It's a Squirrel's life

[Scotti]

I think you are fantastic at being the QMBG ummm sure, fantastic, the best, The TOP. Bet you are really good at QMBGing and "wacking the squirrel" err I mean "wacking the mole". We can all go to Chucky Cheese. I'll get one of those big pizza paddles and when Squirrel gets the pie on her butt, umm well I mean Pizza Pie, Really! Anyway when she gets a pie on her butt, you can wack it off. It'll be educational for me to see how the QMBG keeps the Squirrel in line and obedient. And I am not at all intimidated by New Yorkers, My Mom is from TEXAS.. YEEHAW

More power to "THE" QMBG bring on the TALENT. That's the one that writes the #1 stories. Correct?? Or is it the the other one who makes her write them??? Please further educate me Q.

Scotti

I believe she meant "The Babster" Ms. Streisand.. BARBARA

[Scotti]

oops sorry I forgot the hailing and genuflecting thing. Hope I didn't hurt your feelings Q, erm can I call you Q....Please???

[QMBG]

okay now scotti...first let me say that at first i wasn't gonna let you call me Q...but then i thought about it...and the sucking up you did by genuflecting...and the fact that you understand that i am the power behind the squirrel...i decided to let it go...you may call me Q...but remember it holds the same majesty of QMBG...just because i permitted you to shorten my title doesn't mean my powers have vanished...now that that is said...let me say that i believe you really are scared of the new yorker because you brought out the fact that your mom is from yeehawville...is texas still with the union...i thought you guys were leaving...oh wait you live in central california...what does that really mean...if i knew my geography i would be able to figure that out...but since i'm challenged in that regard...and many others btw...i need you to point me in the right direction...as a matter of fact, i was gonna kick some booty a couple of days ago, but i couldn't find wisconsin...oh well...seems i'll have to pick on my gorgeous-land scotti...do you believe you live in a country where same sex and opposite people can marry...hhhmmmm...can't figure out if your gay or not...but the pizza paddle indicates you is in to BDSM...yipee sign me up to cable...scotti is on...listen...me, squirrel, wolf (my girl) and some friends wanna visit california...can we crash at your place and then eat at chucky cheese...

OH AND LASTLY, squirrel was supposed to set up a new topic for her visit to the Q's homeland...yes that's right, the squirrel is coming to the big city...and unless she puts up the new topic soon...i will beat her till she's senseless...oh wait too late, she's already there...

All hail the Q.

[Scotti]

Greetings, oh Heavenly Q,

Thanks for the privilege btw. Today I feel special (really( . Let's see. Central Coast of California is designated by the location of being between Santa Barbara and San Luis Obispo. Specifically I live in the Grover Beach/Pismo Beach area. As to the visiting thing, I actually work at a small Hotel a block from the beach that is very reasonably priced and is in close proximity to Beach, Restaurants and other local establishments. I could probably provide a significant discount if you wish to visit us. My Mom is the most awesome, loving, funny, and fun person I have ever met!! She scares the sh@t out of me when she wants too. Honestly don't think Texas has much to do with that, but it helps as a indicator of her personality . Well Texas has had a few dark marks against it in the last 8/10 years or so.. But really it's not Texas' fault that the previous C&C was a huge disappointment. I don't think they will be changing the name to "ISBUSHAWEED" anytime soon. Poor Texas, forget the Alamo, its going to be about whatshisface for a while. Anyway. Wisconson?? isn't that the place that smells like cheese and the people have an ummm interesting accent? Never been,. I believe in same sex marriage but I am not sure what "opposite people mean" but hey if it makes you happy then marry away. Good on ya!! I am Gay, queer, around the bend or any other euphemism that may apply. Never had a BDSM encounter but I do get CABLE ... Come visit I know a place that has awesome Pizza, cold beer and very few "little monsters" that pollute the ball pit and hog the "whack a mole" and the Pizza Paddles are plentiful. I hope the Squirrel and yourself let us in on the happenings when she gets to the Big City, I would love to hear all about it..

Hey the only other Q (fictional) i know of is also "Omnipotent" is the Q moniker a godly thing??

[Scotti]

sorry, I'll get the hang of this part...Promise. Still waiting patiently although with quite a bit of excited anticipation for the Squirrel's next contribution to the Talented, Awesome, really really enjoyable stories here on the Atheneaum. Of course all do to the Amazing, Godly instigation errmm I mean Inspiration of QMBG in all her omnipotent perfection...

was that a good suck up statement???

[QMBG]

scotti, my love
first did you just decline to put us up when we get to central coast california...what are we red-headed stepchildren (stole that from the squirrel) i thought we were friends...where did i go wrong...all the effort i've put into cultivating our relationship and you won't put up 3 or 15 houseguests...seriously, i'm disappointed...i haven't a clue where pismo beach is...is that like alka seltzer...i hate that pink stuff...so you work at a hotel a block from the beach...interesting...do you get a commission for bookings...and how far is that block in california terms...1/2 mile...significant discount...how about free...smirk...you know something funny, my mom scared the crap out of me too...i lost her last year...and miss her terribly...be good to your momma...now enough of the seriousness...texas...i think it would be too easy to insult it...sooooo...moving onto another topic...i was poking fun at carrie prejean the miss california and her claim to fame that she believes in "opposite" marriage...i.e. a man and woman...guess you don't read the news...damn...another dumb bunny...anyway...i love pizza...and love to be able to paddle just about anyone...squirrel, me, and my better half will surely have a blast in the big apple...you will hear everything...including the sex parts...and last but not least...yes the Q is godly...so keep up the good sucking...i am really into that...suck strong and hard...smirk...

All hail the Q

[badsquirrel]

jeez you two...get a room

in fact, if you scroll up you'll notice that this thread is called It's a SQUIRREL'S Life

don't know if you are aware, but there's a thread called It's All About the QMBG. no one ever posts there. i provide a space free of charge where ya'll can genuflect and suck up without embarrassing yourselves...but, nooooo. ya gotta do it right out on the street where everybody can see. well, you're scaring the horses.

so, to recap:

It's a Squirrel's Life--talk about the awesome squirrel

It's All About the QMBG--do the whole sucking up thing

that's all i gotta say

p.s. hi wisconsin

[QMBG]

first...if it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have any postings on this forum...
second...it may be called a SQUIRREL's Life, but if you remember correctly, i gave your life meaning, hence, the topic should always be about me...
third...i don't want to go to that thread, i want to go where i want to go...
and as far as genuflecting and sucking up...there should be an unlimited and untettered universe for that...
fourth...i'll do it on the street with scotti and everyone will be amazed at the flexibility of scotti...grin...
fifth...recap: all about the Q...all about the sucking up to the Q...and that's all i gotta say...

p.s. love to the U.K.

All Hail the Q

pss...the love of my life wolf told me how to do the avatar...ain't it cute...

[dinasbran]

*coughs pointedly*

you will do WHAT with scotti, QMBG my love?

*considers suitable punishment for scotti, the temptor of QMBG*

Hmmmmmm, I think a set of saddlebags would be more appropriate given the texan heritage...and handbags get a bit so-so after a while... so, PREPARE FOR LUNG RIPPING!

*evil grin*

[badsquirrel]

and ya'll thought i was kidding

[Scotti]

ummm, did I miss the part about me agreeing to bendy street sex with a God(dess)? I don't even know what "street sex" is. Is it like 80's break dancing sex that you do on cardboard dance floors on the sidewalks of N.Y. with people named Shabba Doo and Little Dickie. Cuz Scottie doesn't like it doggie style but the Dickie (Lucinda) I would of done way back then (80's). Please don't pppunish me for someone else little side bar into fantasy Wolf. Errm not that I have anything against the QMBG, but I think sexual relations with a Goddess is a bit beyond me. Right?? Who would ever have the gutz to wrestle a wolf for her mate.They mate for life right? and that mate being Divinity. No Way, That's just crazy.

Now then, I suck up to the Big Q cuz she has the the RED letters and says she has control over the Squirrel's literary efforts. Since I LOVE the Squirrel's Literary efforts and really want her to produce more said efforts. I will suck up..In Print ONLY!! To whoever is necessary. That being said. Squirrel, can't wait to read any new stuff, please don't fall in the nasty waters of N.Y. Harbor, who knows who is floating around dead in there. And according to Q she might of done it...Or the Wolf got mad at the last huggee of the Q.
oh mighty Q... Please continue to intimidate Squirrell into writing more. OK*** 1 CA block from the Beach, No you can''t stay with me, No not for free but cheap, No I don't get commission. Pepto Pismol is Pink, Alka Seltzer is clear. I don't like sex on dirty sidewalks.My Mom passed a few years back but I still tend to talk bout her in the present tense. Someday I think it would great to meet you, the Squirrel and the Wolf.. Have a cold Beer and a decent Pizza. I have had plenty of laughs so far so I am thinking a few more could be in my future. THANKS!! U all are COOL!!

If y'all are old enough to get the Shabba Doo and the Dickie(Lucinda) ref.. U ARE OLD TOO!!!

[Scotti]

umm right here you go Q

for the Squirrel:

for the Wolf:

for u all

[gheri_b]

Hi Squirrel!

Who are all these nutballs invading and abusing your thread for their own so-called glory?
QM...BS?...Blah blah blah....whatever.

It's all about The Squirrel in Wisconsin.

Love,
Wisconsin

[dinasbran]

Excellent groveling there, scotti, you are obviously a black belt in the ancient art of grovaido - I bow before your skill...



rat - have you not worked out yet that everything is about the QMBG, even if it isn't - believe me there are less bruises that way

did I just say that?

oh cripes

*looks for somewhere to hide*

*fails*

*tries to look innocent*

*fails*

*smiles ingratiatingly at QMBG*

didn't mean it honest, sweetheart...

[QMBG]

no scotti, you didn't miss the agreeing to the bendy street sex...i just put it out there for your consideration...and while i'm older than you, i haven't a clue as to who shabba doo and little dickie are...or dickie a/k/a lucinda...hhhmmm...the 80's are a blur to me...btw scotti, sexual relations with a goddess always grants big bragging rights...can't believe you would pass...

as for wolf mating for life...you are correct...me and the wolf are soulmates that will live out our lives together...if she knows what's good for her...grin...

just because i put a few bodies into the harbor doesn't mean i'm not a good person...and unless you want a long dry spell from the squirrel, i think you would applaud my intimidation efforts...

crap...i guess my joke about 'pismo' didn't go over well...i'll try to be better...

scotti, as an aside...i'm very sorry to hear about your mom...but it brought a smile to my face to know that you talk about her in the present tense...so do i...in fact, sometimes people think i'm nuts cause i'll look up at the sky (because mom is in heaven cause she was an angel down here) and have a conversation with her...she always did give me the best advice...

i think it would be a blast to get together with people who are seriously challenged as i am...thanks for the laughs...you are COOL too...

All Hail the Q

[QMBG]

my little wolfie is very territorial...she sprays me so she can find me in the forest...grin...

All Hail the Q

[Scotti]

I am remiss in the whole Sex w/Goddess consideration. You are assuredly correct. Bragging privileges would abound. However, in deference to the Wolf, who presumably has very sharp teeth and claws and apparently oppositional thumbs. Cuz she stated the whole "ripping of the lungs" from the body thing. Although if she goes from out to in to get to the lungs then thumbs wouldn't be necessary. I digress... umm where was I? Oh yeah, if you were not soulmated and weren't prone to violent watery violence(only when necessary) and if I was not scared stupid of your mate. I'D DO YA!! But since you and I are these things, I'll live in dreams.

Thanx for what you said about Mom. As I said. The women was the coolest women on the Planet (for me). Obviously you feel the same about your Mom too. I think it rocks when people love, like and respect their Mama's. Nuff said.

Shabba Doo, Lucinda Dickie were the stars of the most coolest Break Dance movie in the history of 1984. When NY street dancing (breaking) and Hip Hop was just odd street performers to most people.The movie is Breakin' and the sequel Breakin'2 Electric Boogaloo.. Give it a gander sometime see if it shakes the 80's loose for ya. The production values were off the charts *snicker* . Are you sure you are older than I?? Intimidate, inspire, coerce, beg, bribe with cookies and "set up the squirrel with sex dates" what ever it takes... I wait with excitement and anticipation...... for the STORY..

Wolf musk : You ARE marked Q. Good on ya both!!!

Scotti

[badsquirrel]

well hello gheri_b!

thanks for joining us. feel free to chime in whenever.

for the record, those nutballs are my friends. i am one lucky squirrel. nutballs are my specialty.

of course, i can not officially condone the QM...BS slam. clever, yes, but unwise in oh so many ways. sorry to say, you are on your own with that one.

i've got a friend up there is wisconsin. be nice to her for me if you run into her.

toodles!

[QMBG]

i will take the postings one at a time....ahem...to begin

gheri_b...are you dissing us...cause us nutballs will come to wisconsin and make cheez whiz of you...if you haven't figured it out by now...the Q is a goddess with many powers and will smote you with the mozzarella from rat's behind...and then scotti will paddle you senseless...of course, she doesn't have much to paddle, since you must have lost all the sense you possess by insulting the Q...i will give you a second chance at becoming a minion of mine...be subservient in all future postings and you will be allowed to remain...otherwise...well, i need not elaborate but scotti will tell you about the swim in your future...later from the Q

now scotti...scotti...scotti...don't let a little thing of 'ripping your lungs out' get to you...live on the wild side...even if it's for a short period of time...the wolf has marked me good...i seem to wear the scarlet W on my forehead...everyone who sees it backs off immediately...i think that was her intention...hmmm...but you're right...if it wasn't for the soulmate thing, watery violence, you being scare of the wolf, and the fact that squirrel already has dibs on my body, I'D DO YA TOO...

you're most welcome...i, too, (see rat i learned...inside joke) respect the people who love their moms...they rock...

shabba doo and lucinda dickie...dear god...just how old are you...besides i was break dancing on the streets of new york before it was popular or a movie...of course, the people didn't know that and called an ambulance, but i was doing my thing...too bad that thing wasn't good...oh well...stick to the hustle...you know the music...hit it...

it's a tragedy i didn't see you walk into the sewer...any pictures...

rat...thanks for the support...you are the best there is in the rodent family...we nutballs are lucky to have you at our sides...except when you start chewing on our nuts...but i digress just like scotti does ALL THE DAMN TIME...love to the writer who will have the next number one...that is, of course, when she posts the damn story...ladies get the word out...the squirrel returns...

All Hail the Q

[Scotti]

hailing the Q.. first..I think I am getting the hang of this.

uhh I think I have been BETA'd by the QMBG. My over abundance of digressions have been pointed out by THE Q!! whoo hooo. Is this a significant event!! Its all in my mind isn't it? DAMN. now she is going to point out my delusions as well. *sigh*.

My walks on the wild side tend to be at a much slower place Q. Well, more like at the pace of a amoeba, do amoebas pace? or do they just lay there cuz they have no legs (digressing again?) sorry. My fantasy life is at an Olympic sprinters pace. So I'll get in the Que(well not the "Q") and wait my turn for the privilege of the wild ride with ya! It'll be FAST. I am after the Squirrel, right? Of course YOU being a life mate of the Wolf the fantasy of the ride will have to suffice. ..

My knees and shoulders are older then my mind thinks they are. But my MIND is younger then my knees and shoulders can physically keep up with. BUUUTTT my hands and mouth, are on a strict exercise program. I am of the age of 4zzzzz oh unhh what timz zitt, nodded off there for a sec. Where's my scooter gotta go to the potty again.

Forget health clinics and gyms. Sex is the best cure. One good night of sex and your problems are gone.
-- Grace Jones