Meet and Greet

[vnud29]

Welcome back to F.A.K.E news ladies and gentlemen. The top story this afternoon is just breaking over the airwaves. Let's join our reporter Mary out on the scene. Mary can you hear us clear?

Why yes I can

Would you like to tell our viewers the situation at hand?

Will do Sherry. At around ten a.m this morning four men walked into the blank bank of blank county. Bystanders reported that the men were noticed right away. They did not have any apparant weapons but their appearance was questionable. They were dressed as the Teletubbies. Yes, you heard right. Tinky Winky, Dipsy, Laa-laa, and Po where all at the scene of the crime.

Did I hear you right Mary? The teletubbies have held up a bank?

Not quite Sherry. The teletubbies stormed into the back at Ten and demanded everyone to give them "Big Hugs". Well, that did not go over too well. From eye witness reports, Tinky Winky hobbled over to the on duty security officer and preceded to "hump" his leg repeatedly. The others ran around tackling patrons and squeezing them hard in a hug. It wasn't until an employee set off the silent alarm did the authorities arive to pull them off the helpless victims.

Well I bet BBC did not promote this violent and disturbing act. Thank you so much for the update Mary

My pleasure Sherry. This is Mary from pseudo studios, and I'll keep updating on the scene here at blank bank of blank county.

There you have it folks. The great Tubbiescape. Now for a quick comercial break and we will be back with the late evening news. Goodnight Ladies and gentlemen.


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Hey! I don't have white hair! *pout*

[Sinclair]

hahahaha you guys crack me up! Finally got my internet working again and find out im like 4 pages behind on this forum, lots of reading to catch up on lol. Silver, or do you mind if I call you April? LOVE your goggle ideas...brilliant. Could definately prevent some people from getting the crap kicked out of them by an angry bf/gf if they knew which side the other person was on haha. And the story of you falling on the stairs...that must have hurt, glad you're ok, but damn I couldnt stop laughing because Ive done stuff like that SO many times. Actually, earlier today I was passing by a bunch of people in the hallway of my hotel and tryin to act nochalant I strolled up to the door and pushed it open--only it didnt open, it got stuck so I ended up walking right into the door but since my arms werent expecting that resistence my head slammed into the door. good times. bruised ego to match my bruised face.

I dont have any new jokes, but my friend sent me this message that made me giggle: "Saw a 6-year old girl with a real mohawk with pink streaks and matching pink converse shoes. I fear she may be cooler that I could ever hope to amount to." kids are crazy these days!

I saw the Atlantic ocean for the first time ever last weekend! Random, I know, but I'm really excited and wanted to share. 20+ foot waves on saturday from leftover pieces of hurricane Bill. Ive never seen waves like that before, I pretty much freaked out. Got like knee deep in the water then realized growing up swimming the in Gulf does NOT prepare one for this

Yuri, I dont know if I've asked you this or if you've mentioned it, have you ever seen the atlantic? I know you live in Fl, but I did too and never saw the need in driving 2 hours to the east coast when I had a beach that was 15 minutes away. shame on me.

[Scotti]

I was walking down the breeze way one day in High School. I was chatting to my friend Beth not really paying attention to anything but her. Apparently I ran right into the Pylon and gave myself a concussion. I say apparently because I only remember the Hospital and the Headache. But all this happened during lunch break in front of the entire student body. An ambulance was called and neck brace etc ensued. Just so you all are informed, I was an All State athlete in High School and College (not to brag) but it was humiliating to run into a PYLON in the Quad at LUNCH in front of EVERYONE and knock myself into a different realm of reality. They called me Beep Beep the rest of my Senior Year...

Beat That

Oh , btw, I once wore Red and White stripped under wear under my white basketball shorts for the Cross town Rival game.. No one told me til it was over.. Our team colors being Red and White I tried to play it like I did it on purpose for team spirit...

Scotti

[vnud29]

Hey colz Actually, I saw the Atlantic for the first time in june when I visited my girlfriend down by miami. It's completely different then the gulf. Darker water and harder sand. I didn't like it lol I'm glad you got your internet fixed finally. I know how it feels to have it down and it sucks a whole lot.

Wow scotti....I don't think I wanna try to beat that lol You win hands down.

[silverwriter01]

This is Sherry Fibber for F.A.K.E. News. The tv station has been flooded with milk. Apparently a milkman swerved out of the way to avoid hitting a kitten and slammed right into the station building. We have equipment floating by and every cat in the neighborhood has stopped by for a drink. We'll report more when we find a large breast pump to pump out all the milk.



Lol, sure Colz, you can call me April, or Silver...just don't call me late for dinner

The Atlantic Ocean is way different from the Gulf. Different color, different everything. But I love them equally just the same.

Awww, Colz, I'm sorry about your ego and your face. I'm sure I have a crazy look on my face that's caught between sympathy, understanding, and laughter.

And Scotti... I can't beat that.

Yuri, you just might have white hair. How's your first week of school going?

[vnud29]

*sits on the front desk with a box of chocolate chip cookies. Dips into the milk and eyes everyone scouring for breast pumps. Does not notice the live feed*


______

Well my weeks has been crazy lol I finally got my schedule fixed today. and I love how my Ap Literature teacher gave us barely a week to get a project done on the bible and able to present. Meanwhile, people in my group are dropping out so I've been running around school for the past two days trying to find a group. So I finally found one today with a group of six, when there was only a group of four lol, with a little more work to do for our group. And we are all in different class periods....its so much fun -___- How about you April?

[silverwriter01]

Cameraman zooms in on a pair of female grips skinny dipping in the milk while a leering Ben Deluder looks on. Camera then turns to film a frantic Chuck and Sherry try to work a breast pump before Mary comes over to show them how its done. Camera slowly turns back to the skinny dippers....

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Lol, project on the bible hmm? Only had one project on the bible and even though I did it, I refused to turn it in on count I thought it was wrong to request people to go home and read the bible to do the assignment. I mean not everyone has a bible at home. Could have at least printed it out for everyone.

12 hour days on campus. Let me tell you Yuri, the minute you go to college you'll find out that 8 o'clock classes in college feels A LOT earlier then it does in school. I used to get up at 6:15 and be fine and ready for school. Now I get up at 7 and I grumble all the way to class. My life is proofs, physics, and AIDS (I'm the president of the AIDS awareness type club on campus)

[vnud29]

*thows a soggy cookie at Ben and the Cameraman. Watches them wipe the mush off and look around. Hides cookies in the drawer and whistles. Hops off and helps Sherry, Chuck, and Mary. Nudges Sherry in the shoulder and points toward the skinny dippers. Grins*

Camera #2 zooms in on Yolanda's and Sherry's face. Then pans to Chuck's blushing face holding the pump. Moves lense to the skinny dippers...zooms in...

__________

I agree, they shouldn't be forced to read the bible but I still did it lol But now we have to have a visual presentations made on a specific verse. It's so freakin stressful. hmmmm I wonder why it feels different. I'm not looking forward to early classes lol Right now I'm trying...trying...to finish up my calculus homework. So lost...lol

[silverwriter01]

Good afternoon, I'm Sherry Fibber for F.A.K.E. News. After many hours we were able to use breast pumps to pump all the milk into a giant baby bottle. Do to the major increase in viewers last night, F.A.K.E. News will be showing women's naked swimming from 7 to 8 every night. Myself and Yolanda Liar will be the judges for the competition but more on that later.

Now over to Yolanda for the weather.

Thanks Sherry. Today's weather is hot, then its supposed to rain, then it will get even hotter. Good thing we got all that milk cleaned up before it spoiled. I am pleased to report that the pool where we will hold the naked swimming is kept at a nice, chilly temperature that will keep the women at attention if you know what I mean. Now over to somebody since I have to go watch the women warm up.


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Ah, the good old days of Calculus. You'd be doing limits right now I bet.

[vnud29]

Hi I'm Mary Kidder and due to Sherry and Yolanda's absense for the moment I'd like to report that the giant 30 gallon baby bottle now has a lucky owner. The octuplets' mother! Just twenty minutes ago she held a press confrence in which she expressed her gratitude at the gift. Even bursting into histerical tears/laughs. However, when she saw the bottle she questioned if there was a double. Another bottle for the other eight babies she has hidden in the basement awaiting to be claimed on her taxes. At this very moment authorities are seaching her household from her slip of the tongue.

Let me look on AIM to answer any questions sent to me.

Username boobs4life asked the question: "Is there any fee for tonights naken women's event? and will binoculars be provided?" To answer your question boobs, Yes there is a small fee of 100 dollars per person. Of course, employees here at psuedo studios get in free in case anyone was wondering. Yes that means you chuck, I see you running around the back rooms. As for the binoculars, we will not provide any but you are welcome to bring a pair. Also, security would like me to inform our viewers that officers will be on site to protect the women. However, if you wish to purchase some extra protection, you may come to the security desk at the pool house. Alway's practice safe sex no matter where you are. I have good news and bad news to report as well. Bad news is that due to the influx of customers at Heartburn Paradise, the Margarita sale has now ended. Please let us give it a moment of silence. Good news, I just got paid four hundred dollars from the anti teen mom's activists group for mentioning safe sex. I'm looking on my iphone right now.

On another note, reporters have yet to find Micheal Jackson and Elvis in Louisiana. But never fear, our reporter out there will not stop till she has uncovered the truth. More on this story will be reported as it comes in. This is Mary Kidder, have a wonderful weekend.

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You must be psychic April. You're right! and I'm so freakin lost lol We just started limits, we are moving on to work on using theorems to solve to find the exact limit. How's your day been?

[Sinclair]

Damn Scotti, you do win, that was rough

I've never knocked myself unconcious before by walking into something, but a girl in my ROTC class didnt show up to PT one morning, we called her cell phone and her roommate answered telling us that she had been walking in downtown and texting at the same time and ran right into a telephone pole. Also knocking herself out and getting a concusion. This girl was also very fit and athletic, scored second highest on the physical fitness test and she knocked herself out like that. It happens to the best I guess lol.

And Yuri, she's right, for some reason it is TOTALLY different having early college classes. I also woke up around 6/6:15ish for highschool and was fine then I get to college and realized that I can barely make it to my 10am classes. My first semester I thought I'd be fine due to my high school schedule so I had a lot of morning classes...yeah...didnt really work out too well for me. So be careful siging up for early classes your first semester. I cant believe they made you do a report on the bible?! I went to a catholic school and even they didnt make us do that. sure we had to read some of it in class, but thats as far as it went.

and speaking of spilled milk, my friend has this strange obsession with wanting to see a milk truck crash and spill milk everywhere. one day while we were driving on the interstate she saw one pull up next to us and she did the first thing she could think of to distract the driver in hopes of spilling milk: she flashed him. well, she tried to. but I yelled "what the f*** are you DOING?!" and she stopped. I dont know whats more weird, the fact that she wants a milk truck to spill, or the fact that lifting her shirt was her very first instinct. yeah. I have some crazy friends.

Hope everyone has a good weekend!

[kali_blue]

This is Mona Lot with LATX news. Our station's motto is safety first. If voyeurism is good enough for our viewers it is good enough for us. The Gals at F.A.K.E. news are no longer reporting the news; they have become it. They have lost their impartiality as well as their underwear.

I wouldn't enter that milk bath without a full-body glove. We at LATX news are happy to watch and report from a safe distance.

Late breaking news... The milk wrestling event has been cancelled. I repeat the milk wrestling event has been cancelled.

We overheard Yolanda calling back to the F.A.K.E. station and speaking with a wealthy, but not too stealthy intern. Following up on this lead we noticed the aforementioned intern stopping at all the local markets beween here and their station. Our crack investigative team learned that Yolanda Ben & Mary have bought up all the instant pudding within a 30 mile radius. The gals at F.A.K.E. have been tossing powdered pudding into the mix and stopped tossing cookies.

Chocolate pudding wrestling will take place when things settle down.
We'll be bringing in the Klieg lights as this appears to be a night sport.

Reporting live from the former sight of the Milky Way Gals to what we are now calling the Pudding Palace. This is Mona Lot from LATX no longer the crier over spilt mik but reporting on sticky wickets.


You gals are crazy. Have a great day. Kali

P.S. There is a bit of heatwave in San Francisco. Blue skies and no fog today.

[vnud29]

Yolanda reporting here live at psuedo studios. Welcome back, I'm very happy to inform our dear viewers that not only will there be naked women swimming out back, but also a small pool will be filled with chocolate pudding. I'm sorry men, but this event is only for women, however you may view the swimming at your leisure.

*shuffles papers*

It would seem that an 'anonymous' box of latex gloves and body suits have been delivered to our door step. After extensive researching (looking inside the box), my co-ancor discovered a business card from LATX studios. On behalf of the employees here at Psuedo studios, I'd like to make an announcement. We, at the studio, do believe the reporters there all suffer from OCD. We have scheduled an appointment at the Funny Farm on 12 street drive in order to determine if this condition is true. More on that story later. Let's take it to our new ancor Courtney Bogus for a sports update.

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I will make sure not to pick early classes Colz lol Thanks.
ahahah kali, nice. Have a wonderful day thanks for the add in our little skit here.

[silverwriter01]

I'm Courtney Bogus reporting for F.A.K.E. News and I'm wearing this full body glove because I'll be joining the ladies in the pudding pool soon. I'm here to give an update on the women's naked swimming event. There are 16 women swimming tonight and the event has been sold out. There are crowd favorites such as Bouncing Betty. She has the form of a great swimmer except for her size F breasts. Some people say those will slow her down if she makes it to the Semi-Finals. There's also Leslie Legs who has legs for days. Leslie seems to be having a few fans given her a massage right now. Other women are doing stretches right now and Sherry seems to be going around giving the women a final inspection. Remember to wear a glove Sherry, thanks to LATX. I'm going to go jump into the pool right now and I'm sure one of our anchors will report back later. I'm Courtney Bogus and I am out...and proud.



_______________________
I wrote up another reply and I thought I posted it but it disappeared....Anyway, yes, Yuri, I'm psychic and that's all you need to know for now. My day's been great. No classes on Friday so I've been relaxing and doing a bit of homework.

Thanks Kali, for playing with us. We'd like to hear more from any other news station as well.

[vnud29]

*shifty eyes* real psychic? is my personal information safe? Am I safe?
Yes, Kali you should play with us. Everyone should. It's great for laughs It could almost make a funny story. except, it's not a story. Just a bunch of skits lol It could be more like a SNL thing lol Which might I say would be hilarious.

[Scotti]

Hey Dudes, this is Sunny Galore here at the Desk for LEZBN News in Sunny Funny California. We have an OUT n PROUD siting being reported from the wacked out world of News in Florida. It seems there is a group of women there that are having some sort of sporting event tht includes, NEKKID chocholate pudding wrestling, Big Floater boob races. And some sort event involving LATX water slide races. We don't have any specific details but from the sound of it these women are NEKKID and Friendly, so any of you unattached Lesbians that happen to be in Sunny Hot Florida looking for a good time join the Galz at FAKE and LATX news.. Seems they have turned there broadcast center into a LEZB friends free for all.... I will meet you there..

Later Dudes


You are all NUTZ and I love ya!!!


Scotti

[silverwriter01]

This is Sherry Fibber and I'm reporting live from women's naked swimming competition for FAKE News. The first few races went very well. There was a small catfight between two of the swimmers. Some nipples and hair were pulled but those women cooled down when we dumped them into the pudding pool. The womens 100m freestyle is going on right now and Bouncy Betty is in the lead! Yolanda sit down! You can't jump in the pool with them!

Since the owner of the station says we have to include something serious in our report, now over to Jim Dull at Blank Blank River Bridge with the latest news on bridge construction.

Thanks Sherry. I'm here at Blank Blank River Bridge and something really incredible just happened. A bolt has dropped from the bridge into the valley below and has fallen about 90m. I wonder its speed is when its halfway to the bottom. If you account in gravity and velocity....*static*

Jim, I'm sorry but we've appeared to have lost you. Thanks for that update. Now back to the swimming.

_____________________________________
I don't know if you will be safe Yuri. Soon you will start derivatives.

[vnud29]

Mary: Hey guys...

Yolanda, Sherry, Chuck, Ben, and Courtney:....ILLEGAL NIPPLE PINCH!!!!

Mary: Guys..

Ben walks to the referee.

*everyone turns head annoyed* "what?!"

Mary: Jim just said that a bolf fell off the bridge, isn't that dangerous? It might fall....shouldn't we warn people?

Yolanda: You're right. I'll call LATX and they will cover it. I have one hundred bet on Betty that she'll win this match. My hands are tied. Preferably to her bed.

Sherry: I have one hundred on Leslie.

Courtney: I have One hundred on the bet that Betty and Leslie will make out. So we are all busy right now.

Chuck: And I just wanna watch

Mary: LATX can't cover the story. They are over there. *points to the pudding pool. Camera zooms onto reporters wiping down women with paper towels. Watches their hands roam over certain areas*.

Sherry: Oh....well....uhh....

________________________________

I don't even want to think of that stuff April lol I gotta take it day by day. I'm dreading working on the bible study project. I only have a couple days and it sucks. Too much stress. grrrrrrrrrrrr.

[silverwriter01]

I'm Mary Kidder and this is my co-anchor Jim Dull.

Jim-Hello

Mary- And we'll be covering FAKE morning news. Lasts night naked swimming and pudding pool event went over well, one could say. Our reporters where too busy looking at Bouncy Betty and Leslie Legs making out to notice that one of the contestants was actually Olympic Gold Medalist Natalie Coughlin. Coughlin won the race easily and I was able to get in a quick interview while she dressed and everyone else headed to the pudding pool. She said she was just in Florida for a few days and felt like a nice cold swim.

At the pudding pool, things got a little out of hand. A health inspector showed up but the people from LATX took care of him. Then the FAKE reporters got into a fight with the LATX reporters and a massive pudding fight started. Unfortanely the police showed up and everyone was arrested except for myself. Good news is that Sunny Galore from LEZBN showed up to bail everyone out of jail and took them all out for drinks. Now everyone is hungover except for Jim and Myself. Jim, tell us what happened with the Blank Blank River Bridge.

Jim-It didn't fall down. They put another bolt in.

Mary-Another lives were saved thanks to the quick thinking of that construction crew. I'm Mary Kidder and that is Jim Dull and this has been the FAKE morning news.

[silverwriter01]

Thats the way to do it Yuri, just take it one day at a time. And actually you'll like derivatives better then limits. They make sense. As for the bible study I can't help you. I mean if Colz didn't have to do a report on the bible and she went to catholic school, you're pretty bad off. Just think of it as another literature book, which it kinda is I guess.