Jody stood in the room that Claire had converted into a fairly decent art studio. The psychologist smiled when she saw Claire's 'invention' for drying Amanda's watercolors propped up against the far wall. The attorney had purchased a piece of sheet metal that Wednesday morning, roughly the size of a double bed, and had covered it with a soft, thin cloth. Fastened to the 'board', as Amanda called it, by magnets, were several paintings in various stages of completion. The board allowed her to work on one picture, while an oscillating fan was drying the others. The pull of the magnets was just enough to keep the paper smooth and wrinkle free. It was a simple gesture by Claire but Jody knew just how much little things like that meant to her business partner.

Jody stepped closer to admire the half-finished works of art. Her eyes drifted to the upper right hand corner of the board where a painting done by Claire and Missy was on permanent exhibit. Jody squinted. She couldn't tell who had painted what. Either Claire's an idiot or Missy's a genius. Jody liked both options.

The wavy-haired brunette let out a long-suffering sigh as she clenched a fist. Then she unclenched it and shook it out. I shouldn't have hit Mark so hard. Shit. I shouldn't have hit him at all. Just like Papa, get mad and hit.

The therapist's temper was like a comet -- explosive and scorching -- but it burned itself out quickly, leaving her plenty of time to regret whatever stupid course of action she'd chosen in the heat of the moment. Now was one of those times. She was still angry, to be sure, but she'd stopped seeing red the moment she walked out of the room. Jody sat down heavily on a loveseat in the corner that had been covered with an old pale blue, paint-stained sheet.

Mark, you should have told me, dammit. What kind of future could we have together if you don't trust me?

"Hi." A blonde head poked into the studio. "Can I come in?"

Jody shrugged one shoulder and Amanda immediately entered the room, plopping down next to her friend. They both remained silent for several moments, enjoying the easy camaraderie and the momentary lull in conversation.

The larger woman turned to face her business partner. "Amanda, I don't think we should recommend that game to our patients," she offered wryly.

Jody's comment caused a giggle that the younger woman was unable to censure. Reluctantly, she let the grin that was itching to show itself appear. "No, we probably shouldn't."

Amanda shifted and with her fingernail began scraping at a rough stain on the sheet that she suspected was dried brownie. "That was a surprise, huh?" It wasn't really a question. Both women could tell by the other's reaction that they had been caught off guard.

"Yeeahh," Jody drawled exaggeratedly. "You could say that."

"Are you ever gonna speak to Mark again?"

"I'm still thinking about it. How about you?"

"Yeah, I’ll probably speak to Mark again."

"Smartass!" Honey colored eyes rolled and Jody groaned. "I meant Claire."

Am I? Amanda swung her head back and forth as if deciding. Ahh. Gumby, you make me so crazy. "I guess... I mean... I suppose since I'm crazy in love with her, and since I'm not willing to give her up over something that happened fifteen years ago, I'll have to forgive her. But I intend to make her suffer for a while first."

Jody's expression turned serious. "The sex happened fifteen years ago. The lie happened every time they should have said something but didn't, and that wasn't fifteen years ago. But I do agree about the suffering part."

The blonde hung her head and let out a long, controlled breath. God, I hate it when she's right. Amanda was more hurt than angry and she suspected that no matter how Jody behaved, she felt the same way. "You're right. They should have said something. I'm not making any excuses for them."

"Do you think it happened just that once?"

Amanda's eyes widened. She hadn't even considered that they might have had an ongoing affair. "Shit! Why'd you have to say that?" The smaller woman felt the tendril of jealously that had been licking around the edges of her heart, take a firm grasp. She felt sick.

"PUHLEEZZ! Don't tell me you've never wondered about those two?"

"I mean... sure but not... Why would I wonder about them? They're just friends like we are. We've never slept together," she offered lamely, already anticipating Jody's counterstrike.

"But I'm not gay."

"But Claire is."

"That didn't stop them the first time."

"But..."

"And that doesn't change how Mark feels about her."

For a long second, that remark shut Amanda up. Mark's crush on his best friend was obvious. The fact that Claire had expressed a clear preference for women bolstered Amanda's security in their relationship, but putting herself in Jody's shoes, Amanda was forced to admit that Jody had it much worse.

"Jody, we both know they love each other." But I know in my heart, Claire loves me the way I love her.

The brunette grunted her acknowledgment and tilted her head toward the ceiling as she closed her eyes. I know he loves her.

"But loving someone and being 'in' love with someone are two totally different things, and it's not Claire that Mark is 'in' love with." I hope this is the right thing to do 'cause she needs to hear this now, not later. "He's in love with you."

Jody whipped her head around and stared at her friend. "How can you be sure?" she whispered, looking more upset than she had since storming out of the living room. The doubt in her voice broke Amanda's heart.

I should have let her kill that son-of-a-bitch Chester for planting all these ridiculous insecurities in her head. She covered Jody's hand with her own. "His eyes light up when he talks about you. It's obvious to anyone who bothers to look."

Jody's shoulders slumped forward and she looked away. "Oh."

"Jody?"

"Yeah."

Sorry, Mark… "He told me that he loves you."

"Really?" Years dropped off Jody's face, making her look like a wide-eyed child who wanted desperately to believe in Santa but knew it was a lie.

Why hasn't he told her? "Yes, really," Amanda affirmed in a tone that broached no disagreement. "Jody, I know you're mad about that whole game thing, but that can't be everything that's upsetting you. What is it?" Amanda coaxed, knowing something had been on her friend's mind for a while now.

Jody tilted her head back and closed her eyes again. She wanted to talk, but the vice-grip on her chest was making it impossible to speak. After several moments where neither woman made a sound Amanda tried again.

"It can't be that bad," the blonde encouraged.

"I'm pregnant."

Amanda's jaw dropped, and then a surprised smile lit up her face. "What?! Jody, that's... Why that's..."

"And I'm thinking about not having the baby and I don’t want to tell Mark about it."

Amanda's initial joy at her friend's news deflated like a balloon full of buckshot. Whoaaaa... "I see." Amanda hoped her voice projected a neutrality she didn't feel. She sat there for a moment… stunned. Screw being neutral! "Jody, that's the stupidest idea you've had in a long time."

Jody reached up and rubbed her temples in an attempt to forestall the killer headache that was on its way. "I know," she answered flatly.

"You don't look so good." Even with the light off in the studio, it was clear that Jody's face was pale. Amanda removed her hand from her friend's grasp and pushed aside a tuft of wavy bangs to lay her palm on Jody's forehead. The skin that should have been warm, especially considering Jody's emotional state, was cool and clammy. "Are you sick?" she asked worriedly.

"I've felt a lot better," Jody moaned and covered her eyes with her hands. Even the movement of the shadows was beginning to make her queasy.

Amanda stood up and reached out for her friend's hand. "C'mon, we're going upstairs so that you can lay down."

Jody opened her mouth to protest.

"Shut up and don't argue with me. And don't tell me you feel 'fine' because I'm not in the mood for anymore half-truths!" Amanda winced as soon as the words left her mouth. Shit. Why don't I just kick her while she's down? The hurt look reflected in sad brown eyes made the blonde feel even worse. "I'm sorry. I'm not mad at you. I promise. It's just..."

"Everything?" Jody supplied.

"Yeah, everything," Amanda sighed. "Things didn't exactly go as I had planned tonight... except for me pigging out on Chinese food. I always plan to do that."

Jody smiled weakly and stood alongside her friend. "Is your guestroom ready for a guest?"

Amanda returned her friend's smile, relieved that her harsh words had been forgiven. "You bet. C'mon." The shorter woman grabbed Jody's hand and began tugging her out of the room.

When they reached the top of the stairs, Amanda stopped in front of her bedroom. "Just a sec." She ran inside and opened one of Claire's drawers, pulling out a practically unused, soft cotton nightshirt. She stifled the urge to bring the fabric to her nose, knowing it would smell like roses. God, I'm pathetic. Even when I'm furious at her I'm attracted to her. What's wrong with me?

Next, Amanda moved into the bathroom where she pulled a new toothbrush from the medicine cabinet and began rummaging through a large assortment of pain relievers. Can pregnant woman have aspirin? Does it even matter if she's not going to...?

"Tylenol... I can have Tylenol." Amanda jumped a little at the voice that appeared out of nowhere.

The younger woman nodded. "Can you have something to settle your stomach? You look a little green around the gills."

"I think I'll be fine once I lie down."

Amanda raised a questioning eyebrow but Jody nodded indicating she was sure. "Okay, lets get you into bed."

Amanda clicked off the light and led Jody to the room across from Missy's. Before entering the guestroom, she pushed open the little girl's door to check on her daughter. As she suspected, Missy was curled up in a ball, sound asleep on the floor. The toddler had graduated from a crib to a bed a couple of months before, and somehow she always seemed to end up on the floor by morning. Well, at least she’s not naked.

Jody watched fondly as Amanda picked up the sleeping child and deposited her on the bed. Amanda pulled up the Rug Rats sheet and comforter, settling them tightly under the little girl's chin before laying Missy's Elmo doll on the pillow beside the messy blonde head. The therapist placed a gentle kiss on her daughter's cheek and moved across the hall to join Jody.

"Here." Amanda tossed over the nightshirt. "Put this on and get into bed. I'll get some water so you can take the Tylenol."

I guess I'm staying. Jody knew better than to argue with Amanda tonight. She could tell her friend was on her last nerve and she didn't want to be the straw that breaks her back. Jody knew her own temper was bad, but her business partner tended to let things build until she exploded in a sustained fury that made everyone around duck for cover.

When she finished undressing, Jody slipped on the nightshirt and crawled into bed, pulling up the soft warm quilt with a quiet sense of relief. Before she could get comfortable Amanda reappeared wearing her own flannel jammies and carrying a glass of water.

Jody gratefully accepted 3 tablets and large gulp of water. She wasn't surprised when Amanda crawled into bed next to her.

Jody turned to face her friend. "Are we having a slumber party?"

"Why not?" I'm not in the mood for the company downstairs. They can just wait. "It's been a while since I've had a sleep over of the platonic variety." Amanda rolled onto her stomach and propped her chin up on her forearm. "Spill it. And I mean all of it. I've got all night."

Jody scowled. "There's not much to tell. I assume you're familiar with the birds and the bees."

Amanda narrowed her eyes. "Jesus, could you be more difficult? That's not what I meant and you know it. I take it this was unplanned?"

"No, Amanda, I've always dreamed of getting pregnant, keeping it from the father and then not having the child," Jody said sarcastically. "I listed it as a goal in my high school yearbook."

Amanda silently counted to ten. Just like Claire. Why do I do this to myself? "Okay. It was a stupid question. Suppose I start off with something a little easier? How long have you known?"

Jody's voice suddenly sounded tired. All traces of her earlier sarcasm had vanished. "I went to the doctor about two weeks ago, but I suspected for another week or two before that."

Amanda's eyes bugged out. "Why didn't you say anything sooner?"

"I... I... shit. I don't know. I needed some time to think about what I wanted to do."

"And this was the great solution you came up with?"

"I shouldn't be anyone's mother."

"Since when? And why not?" Amanda asked reasonably. "You're wonderful with Mark's sons Bobby and Keith, and with Missy. You'll make a fantastic mom."

That can't be true. "That's not true. Chester always used to say..."

"What does that asshole have to do with this?" The words were still hanging in the air when Amanda felt a horrible weight settle on her shoulders. "Please tell me this baby is Mark's and not Chester's." PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!

Jody looked at the other woman as if she'd grown a horn out of her forehead. "Are you insane? I wouldn't let that pig touch me with a ten foot pole."

Whew! Thank you. "You had me freaked out there for a minute." Amanda rolled to her side and let out a shuddering breath. "Who cares about anything that idiot ever said. I know for a fact you'll make a good mother." What else aren't you telling me? "If anything happens to Claire and me, you're the person I want to take care of Missy. You know that, right?" She lightly slapped Jody's arm. "You agreed to that even before her adoption was even final. Why is this so different?"

"It just is."

"Jody..."

"Man, you're annoying!"

"Lucky for you! No one normal would put up with you! Now spill it."

Damn! "Okay, for starters, I'm not sure that I even want kids or that I'm capable of raising them without totally screwing them up. My first reaction when things go badly is anger and violence." Brown eyes brimming with tears met Amanda's. "You saw what happened tonight. What if I do that to a child? I couldn't live with myself if I..."

Amanda held up her hand. "Whoa, just a minute. Have you slapped Mark before?"

Jody shook her head 'no'.

"And what about Chester?" Amanda drew out his name like it was a curse.

The brunette shot Amanda a knowing look.

"Okay... Except for when we caught him with 'Ms. Teen Queen' and, I shouldn't say this, but he totally deserved that." A faint grin tugged at the blonde's lips. "When I finally pulled you off him and convinced you to go outside..." Should I tell her? What the hell. "I kicked him in the... well... let's just say his eyes are probably still watering," she admitted sheepishly.

Jody laughed a little, despite the serious nature of the conversation. "I know all about that." She sniffed. "He threatened to have you arrested for assault during the divorce."

"What?" That bastard! "You never told me that."

Jody rubbed her hand along the familiar quilt, knowing it was one Amanda had brought with her from her condo. "He was just bluffing, I didn't think it really mattered. And no, other than that one time, I never hit Chester." Though God knows I wanted to.

Amanda sobered. "So what makes you think you'd hit a child? You've never hit Missy, have you?" She asked the question fully knowing what the answer would be.

"Of course not! I'd never hurt my buddy. I love her."

"But you'd hurt your own child?"

"Maybe." Now the tears began in earnest but Amanda remained silent letting Jody speak at her own pace. "I'm not sure," she finally whispered in anguish.

Amanda swallowed hard, holding back her own tears. She needs me to listen and not start bawling, the younger woman admonished herself.

"Have you ever met Mark's parents?" Jody asked in what appeared to be a manic change in subject.

Pale brows knitted together as Amanda tried to figure out where Jody was leading. "No." Why are we talking about Mark's parents? "But Claire says they're really great."

Jody nodded, her warm tears tracking down the sides of her face. "They are. It's like he's part of a damned Norman Rockwell family. They all get along and have family picnics and parties and they all get together at Christmas. They really love each other."

Jody used her index finger to impatiently wipe away a teardrop from her chin. "After you guys left the hospital last week I called his parents and they were at the hospital within fifteen minutes. They sat with him the entire day and by that night, I'd met three of his brothers and two of his sisters."

"Mark's really lucky," Amanda admitted, hoping she could give Missy a small piece of that. "How many brothers and sisters does he have?"

"I'm not sure. I think his parents stopped counting after six or seven kids."

Jody cleared her throat, not really wanting to continue but knowing it was for the best. "My parents really loved me too. But they were so strict." Her voice had dropped to a barely audible whisper. "'Spare the rod and spoil the child'. If I heard that once I heard it a thousand times. I was literally 'afraid' to disobey them or to have an opinion that was different from theirs."

With sickening clarity, Jody's reluctance toward parenting was starting to make sense. "They beat you?" Amanda asked astonished, feeling the body next to hers stiffen immediately.

Jody's parents had been killed in a car crash several years before the women met. Jody spoke fondly of her younger brother and sister but that was as much information as she’d ever provided about her family.

"No... Yes..." How can I explain this? "We were disciplined with a belt, but it was never done without a reason. The actual whipping wasn't the bad part. The real problem is that it was done as much to humiliate and put us in our places as to punish us for misbehaving. They were oppressive without meaning to be."

There's never a reason good enough to do something like that. "I'm so sorry." Amanda scooted over and gave her friend a hug, which Jody eagerly returned. "You're afraid you'll do the same things your parents did?" she hazarded after giving Jody a few moments to compose herself.

"Partly. Even though my parents were too strict, I know they loved me. They did the best they knew how." Jody wiped her eyes again, wishing she had some tissues. She tilted her head to the side and looked hard into deep green eyes. "Amanda, I can't be perfect like Mark's family… I don't even know how to be like that. I don't know how to make cookies and I don't want to quit my job to stay home and... I... I would end up disappointing Mark, and myself, and if things don't work out with Mark... I... I don't want to raise a child alone."

"Stop right there." Amanda pressed two fingers against Jody's mouth. "No matter what happens with Mark you would never be alone," she reminded, a little insulted that Jody would think she would offer anything less than her full support. "I will always be here for you, just like you've always been here for me." And so would Claire although you're not ready to hear that yet. If I thought you really weren't going to keep this baby, I'd offer to take it myself.

"You're a great friend, Amanda. I'm surprised you haven't offered to take this baby yourself." Damn, if you were a man I'd have snatched you up years ago. Her headache was starting to subside and some of the horrendous stress she'd been feeling was beginning to fade. Things never seemed so impossible after she talked them through with Amanda.

Busted. "Would you say 'yes' if I offered? You know, I’d love to have another baby and I'd love it like my own."

"I know. But that would never work."

Amanda bit her lip, knowing her friend was right. "What about Mark? You can't honestly believe that he expects perfection. He's been dating you all these months and unless I'm mistaken, you’ve been less than perfect up to now." Aww... C'mon, Jody. "Look at the wonderful job he does with Keith and Bobby. I've never seen a better father. His kids are normal, great, peanut butter in their hair, skinned knees, sometimes-obnoxious little kids. They’re anything but perfect."

Jody groaned and brought her hands to her head. "You won't believe the mess I've made of everything. I'm surprised he can even look at me. A few months ago when I could tell he was getting really serious about our relationship, I panicked and I told him, in no uncertain terms, to back off. And every time he tries to edge his way back, I push him away. I think he's about ready to give up. I know I’m throwing away happiness and I can’t seem to stop."

Amanda felt the darker woman’s forehead again, relieved at the warm healthy feel of the skin. "Why are you telling me this? You should be talking to Mark. Give the man a chance. He's a sweet guy who doesn't seem anywhere close to giving up." Amanda could see still wasn't getting through to Jody. Stubborn!

"Jody, he's not Chester. It's not fair to make him pay for another man's mistakes."

"That's not what I'm doing," she replied defensively.

"Yes, it is."

"No it's..." Am I? Jody shook her head as if she couldn't believe it herself. "Is it?"

Amanda shrugged. "You tell me."

And she did. For the next two hours the two friends laughed, cried, and discussed the fears and joys of parenting and being in a committed relationship. They were surprised and comforted to find that their concerns largely mirrored each other.

Jody’s shared some details about her childhood, some bad but mostly good. And Amanda confided that she wanted to discuss having another child with Claire and her own insecurities regarding what her lover’s reaction might be. The talk left them both feeling better and especially gave Jody some much-needed perspective.

The brunette sat up and stretched her shoulders. "I can't believe I'm really pregnant. It even sounds weird just to hear the words."

More confident that her friend was on emotional sure-footing, Amanda let a little of her excitement and natural optimism show through. "I know it doesn't seem that way now, but it really is wonderful news. She smiled brightly, crinkling her nose and the corners of her eyes. "It's about time Missy had a playmate. I can't wait. You know..." Amanda sat up and clicked on the light next to the bed. "...This is an excellent opportunity for you. Mark is gorgeous and intelligent and you're not getting any younger..."

"You just had to throw that last bit in, didn't you? I'm only a few years older than you are," she whined at the much-used tease. Jody tilted her head toward the door. "Do you think they're still here? I haven't heard them for the last couple of hours."

"I'll go check. Do you want me to tell Mark to go home?" Amanda had her fingers crossed.

"Nah. Could you send him up? Now that I've spilled the beans, I might as well go all the way."

Yes! "Great, I'll tell him you're waiting."

"Oh, and Amanda..." the smaller woman paused in the doorway, "...don't be too hard on Claire. I've been thinking... and if it were me, I wouldn't have said anything either." Jody shrugged. "It's a strong silent thing."

Amanda thought about that for a moment. Mark's a fool if he lets you go. Green eyes twinkled. "Just remember you're own advice, mom."

Amanda expertly ducked a pillow that sailed over her head and into the hallway. She stood up, intent on gloating mercilessly, only to be nailed in the face and knocked back on her butt by a second, better aimed pillow.

"YES!" Jody exclaimed in triumph. "You've had that one coming for months! Not bad for a tired old pregnant lady."

"Humph." Amanda smoothed down her bangs, which were now standing straight up. With her other hand she rubbed her sore bottom. She approached Jody menacingly, but then simply deposited the pillows back on the bed. "I'll be getting my revenge in about..." she paused, "...seven months." With that, she retreated downstairs.

Downstairs was dark and quiet. Maybe they did take off. But when Amanda turned the corner to the living room she heard a sound as familiar as her own voice. Claire's snoring.

The psychologist perched on the coffee table in front of the two sleeping lawyers and studied them in detail. They were sitting on opposite ends of the couch, facing each other, with their legs tangled together and bent. A woolen throw covered their feet. Mark had his good arm thrown over his eyes and was breathing long slow breaths.

Even now, Amanda found it difficult to hold a grudge against the big man. He was always there when Claire needed him and that alone was enough to garner Amanda's respect and affection. But above and beyond that, she appreciated Mark in his own right. As handsome as Claire was beautiful, he remained largely oblivious to his boyish good looks where most men would have grown conceited. He was a consummate professional, both kind and funny, and Amanda couldn't fault him for his crush on her mate. She wondered if Claire were straight, whether she’d be bold enough to give him a run for his money.

Claire didn't look nearly as comfortable as Mark, who was taking up far more than his half of the couch. Her neck was resting in an awkward twisted position and her mouth was hanging wide open, a thin line of drool trailing down her cheek. One arm was dragging on the floor, while the other was wedged between her body and the back of the couch. She's going to have such a neck ache in the morning.

Amanda leaned forward and whispered. "Claire, you need to wake up." No response. This time she spoke a little louder. "Time to get up." Mark stirred but Claire remained dead to the world. Amanda reached out and gently shook her partner. "Claire."

Sleepy, somewhat startled blue eyes opened. "Hi, Mandy." She's talking to me! Claire noticed the soft flannel pajamas Amanda was wearing and that she looked far more relaxed than when she left to seek out Jody.

"Hi yourself. Jody wants to talk to Mark and you need to move so he can get up."

"Sure, no problem." Claire removed the throw from their legs and untangled herself. "Ouch." She grabbed her neck. My neck is killing me. "Get up, Marko. Time to go get what's coming to ya."

"Claire," Amanda scolded, trying not to smile.

Mark yawned, looking at Amanda. "We kind of ran out of things to say and got tired of waiting for you guys."

"It's okay," Amanda reassured. "It's getting late and you're still recovering. I know you must be tired."

"Where's Jody?" the tall man asked nervously, looking around Amanda as if Jody might pop out at any moment.

Amanda picked the throw up off the floor and folded it into a neat square. "She's upstairs in the guestroom. Why don't you go up and talk to her? She's waiting for you."

Mark nodded. "Right." He gave Claire a quick look as he moved out of the room, receiving the encouraging expression he was hoping for.

When Mark disappeared, Claire focused her attention on Amanda, who was still sitting on the coffee table. She patted the seat next to her and breathed an inward sigh of relief when Amanda joined her without hesitation. Time to face the music. "Am I sleeping on the couch?" she finally asked.

Amanda cocked her head and regarded her partner. "Do you want to?"

"No. I'd rather sleep with you." Always.

I'd rather be sleeping with you too. "Is there anything going on between you and Mark other than friendship?" she asked bluntly, wanting this to be over.

"You mean romantically?" Claire shook her head and tried not to laugh. "Absolutely not. There never really was. " She entwined her fingers with her partner's. "I’m already where I was meant to be. I don’t need to look anywhere else."

Amanda looked at their joined hands and greedily absorbed Claire’s words. In her heart she already knew it was true, but it still felt good to hear it. "Good. Then let's go to bed."

Claire considered her lover’s offer skeptically. "Aren't you going to make me beg and grovel?" She ran her fingers through the soft blonde hair, stroking the tender scalp beneath.

Umm. Amanda leaned into the touch, trying not to purr out loud. What did she say? Oh, groveling…right. "I was planning on it, but I've decided that I'm too tired, so I'm skipping over that step and going right to the forgiving you part." Amanda groaned, thoroughly enjoying the massage. "Don't get used to it."

The lawyer grinned. "I won't," she swore solemnly, crossing her heart.

If I don’t get up now I’m never moving from this spot. And why is that bad again? "C'mon, Gumby," Amanda encouraged. "Lets get go to bed and you can tell me all about this 'first time' with Mark."

Dark eyebrows shot up and Amanda held up her hand. "But please spare me the torrid details. I'm opened-minded, but not that open-minded. The Cliff Notes version will work for me." I don't think I'd survive hearing the juicy details.

Claire wrapped her arms around the smaller woman and nuzzled her neck as she whispered heartfelt apologies, which Amanda graciously accepted. It didn't take long for the nuzzling to turn into kissing, which quickly threatened to lead to something more. Claire pulled away breathless, tingling from the overwhelming rush of longing and affection she always felt with Amanda.

Although it wasn’t fair to her past lovers, the lawyer couldn’t help but compare the few kisses she'd just shared with her partner against anything else she'd ever experienced... with anyone. To say they were pale imitations of what she felt now was being kind. They weren't even in the same ballpark. She felt more than a connection with her partner-- each glance and every touch was a reconnecting of sorts. Deep down there was an elemental part of Claire that only Amanda could touch.

Claire chuckled as she guided Amanda around the coffee table and toward the stairs. "Mandy, we were both seventeen and had too much spiked punch at a high school dance. We had no idea what we were doing. Trust me when I say it was far more embarrassing than erotic. 'Torrid' is not how I would describe it."

Amanda smiled broadly, her white teeth visible even in the darkness. She wasn't sure why something so trivial could make her feel better. But it did. Her heart was still pounding from her lover's touch and the idea of anyone else making Claire feel that same way irrationally bothered her.

She knew they had both been in love before, or at the very least, in lust. But what she felt with Claire was undeniably different. Love and a raw unyielding want merged in a way that left her weak-kneed, and exposed, yet feeling undeniably safe. It was a gift beyond price, borne of a connection beyond her understanding. And try as she may, Amanda couldn't help keep the jealous corner of her heart from rearing its ugly head. "You're just saying that to make me feel better."

"Did it work?" Claire laid a palm against Amanda's back as they blindly navigated the steps.

"Is it true?"

"Absolutely. Sad but true."

"Then it worked."

Before they could turn into their room, a loud thump sounded from the guestroom. "Uh Oh." Claire muttered as she bolted down the hall. She opened the door to find Mark laid out on the carpet... unconscious.

Amanda pushed by Claire and stood in front of Jody who was looking at the man in utter confusion. "You knocked him out?" the younger woman asked, hoping for another explanation.

"I didn’t touch him! Well, I touched him. But I didn’t hit him. I swear! He just... just... fainted!"

Claire stared at Jody for a long second then began laughing as she knelt down to wake her friend.

"What’s so funny about that?" Jody asked, frustration and fear leaking into her voice.

A dark eyebrow lifted but Claire eyes didn’t stray from Mark as she examined the big man’s head. "You’re pregnant, aren’t you?"

Narrowed brown eyes turned to Amanda who threw her hands in the air, shook her head, and did her best to look innocent.

Claire slapped Mark's stubbley-cheeks. "The last time he passed out was when he found out his ex-wife was pregnant with Bobby. He did it again with Keith," Claire smirked. "That time he fell face first into a Tampax display at Cub Foods."

Amanda and Jody laughed as Claire continued to try to rouse the tall man. The lawyer rubbed her jaw speculatively. "It must short-circuit his brain or something." Mark moaned and slowly opened his eyes, his face immediately shaping into a big goofy grin.

Claire felt Amanda’s warm hands on her shoulders and she turned her head to kiss the fingers. Then she offered Jody a heartfelt smile that lit up her entire face, deeply creasing her cheeks. She clasped the chuckling woman’s arm. "Congratulations, Jody. That’s awesome news."

"Move your ass, Verna!" the young man called out as he quickly unlocked the door and made his way inside. Lazy bitch, after Christmas her ass is fired.

An overweight, middle-aged woman struggled to get her large frame out of the cramped back of the utility van. "I'm coming, Jimmy," she yelled, careful not to dislodge the cigarette nestled between her lips. "Stupid, pig-headed dickweed," she mumbled. Verna looked around nervously, pulling her sock hat lower over her ears. Where are you? I said 10:30 a.m. sharp.

Jimmy had already gone inside the Easton home and was undoubtedly working on the upstairs bathroom. He followed the same ritual in all the houses they cleaned... upstairs and bathrooms first, then the kitchen, and vacuuming last.

Verna tossed her cigarette on the ground. Her eyes darted back to the house. Screw you and your stupid rules, Jimmy. A little trash won't hurt these rich people. With the toe of her boot she kicked a small pile of snow over the smoldering butt. Tired of waiting in the cold, she picked up her bucket of cleaning supplies and began waddling up the driveway.

"Where you goin', Verna?" a voice called out from behind her.

The rotund woman turned around with a smile that revealed tobacco and coffee stained teeth. "'Bout time you show'd up? I told you exactly 10:30, as soon as Jimmy was outta sight. It's 10:35. You tryin' to get my ass fired from this crappy job?" she hissed. Impatient and cold, she got right to the point. "Did ya bring it all?"

The man nodded and handed over an envelope containing ten twenty-dollar bills.

Verna smiled. Real Marlboros tonight! She reached into her pocket and handed over a key. "No extra charge for me makin' the copy. I tossed that in for free."

Stupid bitch. I ought to kill you right now just to improve the gene pool. "What time will you be finished?" His eyes traveled to the window he knew to be Amanda's bedroom.

"One hour... exactly one hour. I gotta go."

Cory pushed the key inside his glove, enjoying the cool metal against his warm palm. "Good." Without a glance back, he disappeared into the thick layer of trees that surrounded the property.

Verna shivered as he slinked out of sight. Ugh. That fucker gives me the creeps. She stuffed the envelope into her coat pocket and shifted the bucket to her right hand. Oooo baby... Mystic Lake Casino here I come...

Cory sat on Amanda and Claire's bed. He had saved the best for last although he still hadn't found what he was looking for. Where are you going, Amanda? Earlier in the month the therapist had rescheduled his counseling appointment that would have taken place next week. You thought you were so clever. But I heard you talking to Jody. I cannot be deceived. You're going on vacation. You thought you could just leave me… that I’d stand for that?

Cory kept getting distracted from his mission. His eyes greedily took in every detail of the room. He pictured himself here with Amanda, living as a happy family. I could make you forget all about Claire and see the error of your ways. In his fantasy, Amanda was properly repentant, serving Him and properly obeying her husband. That's how it was supposed to be! Why did you do this? Why would anyone deny His plan? You were meant for me. But that bitch lawyer ruined it.

Cory had stayed up for hours the night before talking to Him. He'd pleaded that Amanda be spared. Surely, that perverted attorney had enticed her. Amanda can’t really be one of them. But He commanded her death. His will must be done. It doesn’t matter what I want. I serve Him. And he has commanded it be done before the new millennium. I don’t have much time.

The slender man moved into the walk-in closet and clicked on the light. It didn’t matter that he would kill Amanda soon; Cory wanted this time alone with her personal possessions. He pulled a pale blue, soft silk blouse from its padded hanger and fingered the cool fabric. It was the blouse Amanda wore during their first session together. That's when he first spoke to her with his mind. He didn't need to use words. He was the Chosen One and had been given skills above all others.

Cory looked at the clothes with great interest. Half the closet was reasonably neat with the clothes organized by color and type. The other side was a series of unorganized piles and rumpled dry cleaning bags. The dress clothes appeared to be hanging tidily while the casual items were strewn about in total disregard. He looked on with distaste. She doesn't serve you well, does she, Claire? That's because she is not yours. She would serve me. Seeming to ignore that he lived in a pigsty himself, he was appalled by Claire's messy side of the closet. This is unacceptable! He abruptly kicked over one of the piles as he exited the closet and forced his scattered brain back on track. Cory moved over to the computer table in the corner of the room. The table was clean. Dammit. They have a Xerox machine at home? No. A fax machine? YES!

In the paper tray were a map and a message from Iris Parks.

Cory grabbed the sheet of paper and started to walk out of the room, pleased with his cunning and investigatory prowess. He stopped dead in his tracks. Wait. They might notice this is gone. No more mistakes. Cory sat back down at the desk and slipped the map back into the tray. Then he opened the desk drawer and pulled out a blank scrap of paper and pen. He spent the next several moments meticulously copying the map. When he was finished, he crammed his map into the front pocket of his Levis and headed downstairs to make a sandwich, idly wondering if all hunters worked up such an appetite. An odd smile twisted his face. I wonder what I should pack? I’ve never been on vacation before.

"I miss her already."

"We haven't even left yet."

"I know. But Missy has," she replied a little embarrassed, a hangdog expression on her face.

"It's okay, you know. I miss her too. It already seems so quiet in here." She glanced around the bathroom. "But I didn't want to drop her off at Mrs. Fisher's so early tomorrow. The poor woman should at least be allowed to sleep past sunrise. Besides, God help her, she'll need all the strength she can muster to watch Missy on a twenty-four hour basis."

Claire's chuckles sent tiny ripples through the hot bubbly water.

Amanda spared an affectionate smile for the lawyer's softer, sentimental side. "Don't worry, Gumby. She loves being with Mrs. Fisher." Green eyes twinkled gently. "I won't tell anyone how hopelessly she has you wrapped around her tiny little finger." Nobody would believe it anyway.

Claire scowled, knowing it to be completely true, but feeling the urge to deny it nonetheless. "She does not."

Pale eyebrows shot skyward and Amanda reached around Claire and grabbed a bottle of shampoo. "Riiiight," the shorter woman drew out the word. "Like I believe that." The psychologist squeezed out a healthy dollop of the cool liquid into her palms and rubbed them together. She sighed, enjoying the hot bubble-filled water and the private time with her partner. "Turn around." Amanda twirled her fingers in a circular motion. "I'll get your hair."

Claire complied easily, stretching her long legs out in front of her.

"This tub was such a good idea," she groaned as her partner's fingers wove their way through her hair and began their gentle scrubbing. Claire scooted back farther until she could feel the increase in water temperature from her lover's body.

Strong hands moved down and soaped Claire's neck and shoulders, digging into the flesh with firm but gentle pressure. "Are you all packed?" Amanda asked, wondering how much longer Claire would allow her hands to roam freely, before losing control and turning around.

"Umm... I am, I think. I'm just bringing jeans and sweatshirts...stuff like that. I even packed some pajamas in case I get cold."

Ten bucks says they never make it out of her suitcase, Amanda wagered herself. Reaching over to a small shelf alongside the tub, she picked up one of Missy buckets and began rinsing off the silky dark tresses with fresh water from the tap. "Same here." The blonde emptied several more buckets before Claire unexpectedly moved away and settled at the opposite end of the tub facing Amanda. Where in the heck are you going? The therapist didn't hide her look of disappointment.

Claire grabbed a bottle of liquid soap. Smiling, she crooked her finger. Amanda grinned wildly and bounded over to Claire like a puppy sloshing through the surf. The blonde placed a light kiss on Claire's lips before turning around, squaring her shoulders, and closing her eyes. This is gonna be soooo good. She absolutely loved it when her partner washed her hair-- probably because Claire was never content to stop with her hair. Every inch of her body was scrubbed and rinsed with loving detail, either leaving her so relaxed she was near sleep or... Amanda smirked. This is better than foreplay. She gasped as warm hands grazed the sides of her breasts on the way to her abdomen. Emerald eyes popped wide open as every nerve in her body stood up and saluted. Amanda moaned inwardly. This is foreplay.

Claire's hands moved to her partner's hips. With a slight tug she pulled Amanda back to rest against her chest, squeezing out nearly every last drop of water between them both. Both women sighed at the familiar but sweet sensation of skin on skin. Claire brought her arms up underneath Amanda's breasts and wrapped her in a warm hug. She rested her chin on the therapist's muscled shoulder. "You're really happy for Mark and Jody about that baby, huh?"

The blonde laid her arms over her mate's and nuzzled the attorney's cheek. Claire's legs were on the outside of hers and Amanda wiggled her toes, noticing they only came to mid-calf on Claire. "You bet I'm happy. Once the shock wears off Jody's going to be fine." She didn't say anything for a few moments. Then she added, "A baby should always be a thought of as a blessing." Amanda felt Claire swallow and nod behind her.

"You should have seen Marko, this week at work. He was walking around like the cat that ate the canary."

"Jealous?" Amanda teased, expecting a laugh from her partner. She didn't get one.

Claire tightened her grip on Amanda and didn't answer for a long moment. Finally, she sighed. Yes. "A little, I guess."

Amanda cocked her head to the side and turned, trying to see Claire's face. "Why?" she asked, curious.

Ask her. What's the worst thing she can say? "Mandy, have you ever..."

RING. RING.

The lawyer groaned loudly. "Let the machine get it." Claire locked her arms around Amanda's mid-riff to prevent her from leaving.

"Claire..." Amanda squirmed, prying her way out of Claire's grasp. "It could be about Missy or one of my patients," she said sternly, slapping the wet forearms.

The attorney released her instantly, opening her arms allowing her partner to exit the tub. Shit, I didn't even think about that... stupid.

Amanda managed to make it to the phone by the sixth ring. She stood shivering and dripping in the hallway for a few seconds, until she felt the warm slightly rough fabric of her bathrobe being draped over her shoulders and an even warmer body behind it press up against her. "Just a moment, Mrs. Clifford." She put her hand over the receiver and turned apologetic eyes on Claire. "It's a patient," she whispered. "I'll be a little while." Amanda brought her hand up to Claire's cheek. "I'm sorry I snapped, Gumby. We'll talk later, okay?"

Claire nodded and quickly disappeared back into the bathroom. Amanda fought the urge to follow after her, not missing Claire's masked but clearly crestfallen expression. "Damn," she muttered.

"What was that, Dr. Greer?" the voice asked.

Amanda frowned, hating the vague unsettling feeling that an opportunity had just escaped her. "It's nothing, Diane." Amanda did her best to tie the robe around herself one-handed and took a deep breath. "What's the emergency?" she inquired calmly.

It had taken Amanda nearly two hours to calm her patient, and Claire had long since given up on salvaging the evening. Grumpy and bored, the attorney allowed herself to revel in a little self-pity. She had plans for that bath, and while she wasn't exactly angry with Amanda, she was honest enough to admit she was annoyed.

Amanda lifted the comforter and slid into bed alongside her lover. "Claire?" she whispered, wishing the attorney wasn't facing away from her.

Silence.

Amanda sighed and spooned herself against her partner, absently stroking Claire's fresh-smelling hair. She inhaled deeply. Mmmmm. Amanda wasn't at all tired, and enjoyed a moment of peaceful reflection before deciding to call Claire's bluff.

"I know you're awake," she informed flatly. Ooooo, I hate it when you do this and you know it! Passive...aggressive...

Nothing.

"What? So now you're not talking to me?" Amanda asked incredulously, her frustration mounting. "I wasn't gone that long." While the silent treatment never worked on Claire, it was extremely effective against the younger woman.

The attorney grinned in the darkness. "How do you know I'm not sleeping?"

Amanda could hear the smile in Claire's words and despite herself she smiled in return. "Other than the fact that you just answered my question?" She paused and wisely decided that using the phrase 'incessant snoring' wasn't such a good idea. "Your breathing is different."

The younger woman snuggled closer, fitting her thighs tightly behind her partner's. She felt Claire's surprised jerk at the intimate flesh on flesh contact. Amanda usually wore pajamas.

When Amanda spoke, Claire could feel her warm breath against the nape of her neck. "Sweetheart, I'm sorry that took so long," she apologized sincerely. "It couldn't be helped."

How can I be mad at you for something that I've done myself a million times? "I'll live," Claire replied succinctly. She winced, hoping her words didn't sound as cold to Amanda as they had to her own ears.

You think I wanted to leave that nice warm bath? "You're pouting," Amanda said, slightly amused. "Poor, baby." The words were teasing but threaded with sarcasm.

With effort, Claire bit back the acidic reply that was on the tip of her tongue, and chuckled instead. She's right. "So what if I am?" she challenged without rancor and turned to face her lover with a flashing white smile.

"Ohhh, it's okay if you want to pout occasionally, Gumby." A single finger traced Claire's bottom lip. "You look kinda cute..." the finger gently pulled the lip down, "...when you do that," Amanda finished sweetly.

Claire narrowed her eyes, which only served to make Amanda giggle. "I'm glad you find me amusing, Mandy. I feel the same way about you."

Claire drew her palm along Amanda's ribs causing a hitch in the shorter woman's breathing. "Are you sleeping like this?" Meaning nude.

Amanda nodded. "Do you mind?" she asked innocently, leaning forward until her bare breasts were pressing against Claire's.

An involuntary sigh escaped Claire's lips as Amanda's legs tangled with hers and the blonde moved completely on top of her. Not tonight, Mandy... Claire rolled them both over and tucked Amanda securely beneath her. With a single tug she threw off the comforter, fully exposing them both to the chilly night air.

Dark green eyes widened in surprise. Wow. Then the blonde's low moans were swallowed as full soft lips ravaged her mouth while a solid, reassuring weight pinned her firmly to the bed.

After a moment, Claire pulled back and stared at Amanda. "What? Why did you stop?" Amanda complained, panting. The smaller woman's body was already throbbing with need, a delicious ache settling between her legs.

Claire cocked her head curiously. "I'm deciding," she finally stated quietly. The older women shifted her thigh between Amanda's legs and pressed it snugly against Amanda's center. "Give me a minute."

The blonde groaned as if in pain, the leg between hers only intensifying her need. "Whatever it is can wait. Decide later!" she growled.

Claire shook her head, trying not to smile, and gave her partner her most serious expression. "It can't wait."

Amanda rolled her eyes. "Honey, why don't you let me help you decide whatever it is you're deciding so we can get back to..." she let her voice trail off.

The lawyer remained pensive, then barely adjusted her thigh, sending another wave of sensation tearing through Amanda. Ugh. She's trying to torture me! "Please Claire, I'm really good at deciding things." Especially when I'm this motivated.

Claire leaned in and placed her lips alongside Amanda's ear. "All right," came the smooth reply. When the taller woman began whispering, the warm air sent shivers down Amanda's spine and green eyes fluttered shut.

"I'm trying to decide what I'm going to do to you," Claire purred, pleased when she felt the sharp intake of breath in the body beneath hers.

The brunette swallowed hard and focused on Amanda, trying not to get caught up in her own game. Licking her lips she continued, "I've decided to take you, Mandy." The words were spoken in a way that made Amanda believe World War Three couldn't stop her lover. "But what I can't decide... is exactly what I want do to your luscious body."

"Anything... Anyhow... Anyway..." Amanda whispered breathlessly. She had never been more sincere in her life. Wherever Claire wanted to go, she knew she would willingly follow.

Claire shifted and poured her heart into an achingly tender kiss, temporarily abandoning her plan. She trailed a path of light kisses back to her partner's ear. "I know that, love," she murmured softly.

The older woman bite back a groan when Amanda trailed her hands along the muscles of her lower back in unspoken encouragement for her to continue. God, you know I can't think when you do that! Damn, you play dirty.

Determined hands slid lower and cupped Claire's bottom. With a strong pull, Amanda flattened the leg between hers and wantonly began grinding Claire's hips against her own.

Claire could literally feel her partner's arousal and this time she couldn't quiet her body's innate response as a faint hiss escaped her own lips.

Unseen by Claire, Amanda's mouth shaped a small triumphant smile. Claire's muffled hiss hadn't gone unnoticed. If I'm to be tortured, Gumby, I'm taking you with me.

Claire tried to still her hips but Amanda would have none of it. Finally, when she sensed she was completely losing control, she grabbed her partner's hands and pinned them to the bed. The attorney did her best to ignore the pitiful whimper this action drew from her partner. "Stop trying to distract me, Mandy," she growled. "You always want to talk... well, now I'm talking."

"Smartass," the younger woman mumbled causing Claire to chuckle quietly. Amanda was turned on and frustrated. This woman did not like to wait and Claire knew it.

Claire's next words were carefully chosen and spoken in a deep commanding voice that rumbled its way through Amanda's blood, scattering any designs she may have had of turning the tables on her lover. "One more move like that, Mandy, and I will stop. Completely stop. Understand?" The tall woman let go of Amanda's hands.

Amanda nodded, barely hearing Claire's words over her own pounding heartbeat.

"Good. Now I've narrowed things down to two different paths. Would you like to hear about them?" the voice rumbled in a sensual purr that nearly made Amanda swoon.

Amanda nodded again and silently reminded her disobedient hands to remain motionless. She was still finding it inconceivable that her hot-blooded lover, who could let hours pass with nary a grunt between them, had become chatty... NOW! But she knew Claire was serious and that was all the convincing it took.

Claire lifted her head and smirked at her partner. "I knew you'd see it my way." Leaning close she placed an almost chaste kiss on her lover's lips before returning to her former position alongside Amanda's ear.

"I'm torn really..." she began. "Part of me wants to take you, control you..." Claire snaked her hand between them and firmly grabbed Amanda's breast causing the younger woman's entire body to jerk in response. The move was commanding and powerful and this time Amanda did swoon.

"...feel you squirming..." Claire's thigh made its presence known again between Amanda's legs when she slid it to where Amanda was all fire and liquid, eliciting a loud moan.

"...and writhing..." Claire's other hand found its way between Amanda's legs and purposefully drove forward. Amanda gasped then arched into the touch, her body involuntarily moving in tandem with Claire's erotic words.

"Sweet Jesus, Claire!" she cried out as Claire's hand continued to thrust forward, never stopping the barely audible barrage of 'wishes' that were more like commands in her ear. Amanda knew the words alone were enough to send her over the edge, but in combination with the relentless, masterful touch of her lover, she feared things would be over way too soon. Forever is way too soon.

Unexpectedly, Claire's motion stilled and the lips next to Amanda's ear drew so close that Amanda was certain the words were coming from inside her own head. The tip of Claire's tongue traced the pink ear and she inhaled deeply, relishing the smell of clean sweat, Amanda's shampoo, and her lover's skin– ascent she was sure shewould recognize not only in this lifetime but any to come.

"...and begging...," she whispered hotly.

Amanda opened her mouth. Her immediate instinct was to indeed beg. But a tiny kernel of stubborn pride refused to give in and her mouth defiantly snapped shut. She felt the lips next to her ear curl into a broad smile. Oh God. Wrong move, Mandy! The psychologist's heart pounded in anticipation of Claire's next move, and Amanda was already fiercely regretting her foolish decision against instant surrender.

Claire removed her hands from Amanda's breast and between her legs. The profound feeling of loss jolted the younger woman. I knew it! Shit!

"...and pleading...," Claire continued as she suddenly thrust her fingers forward, and cruelly stopped, allowing Amanda a small sample of what her rebelliousness was costing her.

Amanda's inner war raged. She was teetering on the brink of the climax that she craved. Things had escalated beyond mere want... this was about need.

"...for me to taste you."

Amanda's eyes rolled back in her head as she imagined Claire's hot mouth on her and her composure unraveled like a ball of yarn rolling down hill. She gave the hands she had been fighting to still free reign and they grasped Claire's face, forcing direct eye contact. Blazing emerald met intense azure and Amanda swore she could see an arch of sparks fly between them. "I don't care what the 'other' part of you wants. Choose this and choose it now," she demanded with an incendiary kiss.

Then Amanda gave her lover exactly what they both wanted...her complete and unconditional surrender.

Comments or questions to Advocate advocate8704@yahoo.com