Chapter 10

That afternoon when Drew came by to see the kids, she gave Lola a friendly smile as she entered the house. “You’re looking better today.” Lola mentioned. “I was worried about you yesterday. You looked sick.”

“Oh. I just had a terrible headache. I am feeling much, much better. How have the kids been today?”

“Good as always.”

“Great. I was thinking that tonight we could all go out for dinner, you know kind of a family night. What do you think?” Drew suggested testing the waters with Lola’s receptivity for spending time together.

“Yeah. I’m sure the kids would love to do that. Did you have a place in mind?”

“I figured I’d let you pick it. We’ll go wherever you want. I’m going to go say hi to the rascals.” Heading into the living room, Drew greeted all her kids with hugs and kisses as usual before settling down to play with them. A few minutes later Lola joined in as well and soon both of them were laughing together at their children’s antics.

At dinner time the five of them went our for a relaxed meal before the kids convinced them to go by the video store for the latest Disney movie. Once they were back at home, all five of them piled on the couch, Lola and Drew at opposite ends with Jack and Libby between them. Drew held Emma on her lap, and all was quiet as the kids became engrossed in the film. About half way into the movie Emma began to fuss, so Lola took her from Drew, knowing that the infant was probably hungry.

Only a few moments after Lola left the room, Jack turned to Drew and inquired, “Mommy, can we have some cookies and milk?”

“Yeah, Mommy, please.” Libby added.

Drew thought it over a moment before replying, “Okay. I guess so. You both ate a pretty good dinner. You stay here and watch the movie. I’ll be right back.” Getting off the couch, Drew made her way into the kitchen to retrieve the snack when she saw Lola sitting at the table breast feeding Emma. Adverting her eyes she mumbled, “Sorry about that. I didn’t know you were in here.”

“It’s all right, Drew. I don’t mind. You used to love to watch me breast feed.”

Drew shyly took a peek at Emma taking nourishment from the blonde. “It is rather fascinating.” she admitted bashfully.

Lola smiled at Drew’s modest interest. “You once told me that it was the second most beautiful thing you had ever seen.”

“The second?” she inquired curiously. “Did I say what the first was?” Lola blushed as she nodded, but she didn’t answer the implied question to give that information. When Drew saw Lola hesitate, she asked, “Well, what was it?”

“I don’t think I can tell you, Drew. You were a different person when you said it, and I feel fairly sure you wouldn’t agree with it now.”

“Tell me anyway. How am I supposed to come to know myself again if you don’t help me?”

Lola looked away from Drew’s eyes, knowing she couldn’t tell her without it showing how much it affected her. Keeping her eyes focused strictly on Emma, she stated, “You said the most beautiful was me when I would... during sex.”

“When you would what during sex?” Drew inquired with a hint of playfulness, intrigued with this development and Lola’s growing blush.

“You know.” Lola whispered with an embarrassed grin.

“No, I don’t. You better tell me.” innocently Drew stated, even though at that moment she knew precisely what Lola meant. For a spilt second she felt completely comfortable with tormenting the younger woman this way.

Lola sensed the teasing in Drew’s manner and thought that maybe she too could push the envelope with her wife for once. “Well, I’m not going to yell it out, Drew. You want to know you need to come a little closer.” she demanded beckoning her with a gesture of her hand.

Drew took the bait and leaned down to hear what Lola was going to say. Lola leaned up towards Drew’s ear, almost touching it with her mouth as she held the collar of Drew’s shirt in her grip. “You said the most beautiful thing you had ever seen what the sight of me reaching orgasm while you were inside of me.” she whispered sexily.

Drew didn’t even hear the whimper that escaped her lips as Lola’s hot breath tickled her ear. The simple confession shot sexual pulses throughout her entire body as for one moment she imagined what it could possibly be like to see Lola that vulnerable. Clearing her throat of the sudden lump, Drew moved away as she replied, “I see.”

Collectedly Lola mentioned, “Of course, you were a little more romantic about expressing that sentiment.”

Drew just stared at Lola who seemed unfazed as she focused on Emma. However Drew felt a flurry of mixed emotions at the revelation. Before she could comment further however, she heard Libby call from the other room, “Mommy, I want chocolate milk instead.”

“All right. I’ll be right there.” she stated trying to clear her head of what had just transpired..

The rest of the night passed quietly between Lola and Drew. Neither said anything about the incident in the kitchen as they tended to their children. Once Drew had left for the night, Lola pondered the interesting direction she and Drew had suddenly taken and hoped it meant Drew was on her way to remembering their relationship. Lying awake in bed, Lola thought back to the last time she had made love to her beloved Drew. It was the same time Drew had confessed to Lola how beautiful she thought the moment always was between them. Lola allowed her mind to fantasize about her muscular lover and the weight of Drew on top of her as Drew brought her to release. It was her favorite way to be intimate with the sheriff, because she felt totally consumed by the older woman’s larger, heavier frame. Instinctively Lola pleasured herself as she dreamed of Drew’s hands and mouth all over her body until she was exhausted.

When Drew got back to her house that night, she immediately went to the photo albums documenting her life with Lola. The first set of pictures she came to were of Jack’s birth and with it came the recollection of that magical day.

Drew looked down at her wife of less than a year. Lola’s blonde hair was matted around her face and damp with perspiration as a whimper escaped her. Giving her a sympathetic smile, Drew quietly said, “You’re doing so well, honey. It’s almost time. Just try to breathe.”

“It hurts.” Lola whined. “Whose idea was this to have a natural birth? Why didn’t I take drugs when I had the chance?”

“Come on now, Lola. You can do this. Hold on to my hand.” Drew said lending her hand to her wife to squeeze until the contraction passed. She looked around for Lola’s mother, Kate, who was hovering around behind her. The two best friends exchanged smiles.

“How are you holding up, baby girl?” Kate asked moving to the opposite bedside.

“When is it going to be over?” Lola moaned looking pitifully at her mother.

Kate gave a little laugh. “Soon, very soon. Just think, Lola. In a few minutes you’re about to become a mother. That’s what you’ve always wanted. You’re about to make me a grandmother before my prime.” she joked.

“Where’s Natalie?” Lola inquired.

“She went out to wait with everyone else. She couldn’t take seeing the pain.” Kate teased. “She was about to pass out.”

The conversation was abruptly interrupted by the midwife saying, “Okay, Lola, it’s time. Kate, I need you to hold one leg, and Drew, you get the other.” The two older women did as they were told, giving Lola something to brace against. “All right, Lola, it’s time to push. On the count of three. One... two... three...” A loud scream broke through the air as Lola followed the midwife’s instructions.

Drew started to feel nasuated at the sight and sound of Lola’s pain, but she was determined not to faint. Trying to stay strong for her wife, she began to talk to her. “You want to know something weird, Lola? The last time I was in a room with a woman giving birth, guess who it was? It was your mother, and she was giving birth to you. Bizarre, isn’t it?” she said conversationally.

“Oh my, God. That’s right. I had forgotten about that.” Kate mentioned. “How weird is that?”

“Come on, baby. You can do it. You’re doing so well.” Drew stated turning her attention stirctly to her wife. Even though labor seemed to take forever to everyone in the room, the delivery was relatively quick as a wailing baby boy entered the world fewer than ten minutes after Lola had begun to push. As the infant was laid into Lola’s arms, Drew embraced Lola and their baby. “Oh, Lola, can you believe it? He’s here. You did it, love. I love you so much.” she whispered, leaning down to kiss Lola’s wet forehead.

“I love you too, Drew. Thank you for making me so happy. You’ve given me all I’ve ever wanted.”

Drew smiled as she flipped through more photos of their family. Almost every major holiday had been well-documented in pictures and as Drew studied them, she realized that she was recalling almost every event, including the births of their other two children. Even though she was flooded with fond memories of her life after her marriage to Lola, the essence of their relationship still eluded her. She needed to know how they were with each other, and she knew she wouldn’t be able to find that in any pictures.

Sighing Drew wondered if she would ever remember the way it was between them. “Somewhere in my mind is the key. I’ve just got to find it.” she mumbled to herself as she thought about the little blonde..


Chapter 11

That Saturday Drew arrived at the ranch early in the morning. She had planned on surprising the children by making their favorite pancakes for them, but when she got to the house there was an unfamiliar car in the driveway. Using her own key, Drew admitted herself through the side door that led into the kitchen. Walking in she stopped short at the site of Lola and Melissa sitting at the kitchen table.

“Good morning, ladies.” Drew greeted, taken completely back by Melissa’s presence at the ranch at such an early hour.

“Morning, Drew. Can I get you a cup of coffee? What are you doing here?” Lola inquired cheerfully.

“Sure. Thanks.” she replied looking at the doctor, who looked a little sleepy even though she was dressed in riding attire. As Lola stood to go to the coffee pot, Drew took in Lola’s sleeping apparel and suddenly questions arose in her mind as to what was really going on.

Melissa just smiled. “Morning, Drew. How are you?”

“I’ve been better, Melissa. How are you? What time did you get here?” she asked pointedly.

“Actually, Drew, Lola was gracious enough to put me up for the night.” Melissa replied with a grin, intentionally being vague in front of Drew.

“Well, Lola certainly can be a cordial hostess.” she stated before turning to the blonde. “Lola, I need to speak to you about the kids alone for a moment. Do you mind leaving Melissa to her devices for a few minutes?”

“Sure. No problem. Here’s your coffee.” Lola placed the mug in Drew’s hand.

“Thanks.” Drew mumbled leading the way back into what used to be her office. When they were alone with the door closed, Drew scowled at Lola. “What is she doing spending the night here?”

“I invited her to stay. She came over last night to keep me company, and since she was coming back this morning to go riding with me, I suggested she just stay the night. Why? Is that a problem?”

“And just where did Melissa spend her night, Lola?” Drew accused.

“What kind of question is that, Drew? She stayed downstairs in the guestroom.”

“I bet she did.” Drew sarcastically commented.

Lola glared at her. “Are you saying I am lying, Drew Bailey? What is your point?”

“My point, Lola, is that our children think I still live here. For them to see another woman up in her spending the night could be harmful and perplexing to them. Did she spend time with the children last night?”

“Well, yeah. She came over right before I put them to bed. She even read Libby and Jack a story.”

“She read my children a bedtime story? That is unacceptable, Lola. I don’t want her spending time with my children.”

“Our children, Drew, and I think it’s perfectly fine that she be with the kids. They like her.”

“Well, I don’t like her, Lola! The children already have two mothers! They don’t need a third!” Drew yelled slamming her cup against the desk. Coffee spilt over the dark wood. “Dammit!”

Lola scrunched her brow in thought at Drew’s reaction, wondering if the older woman was jealous. Tentatively reaching for the older woman’s arm, Lola asked, “Drew, are you implying that I’m having a relationship with Melissa outside of just a friendship?”

“She wants more than that from you.”

“Well, did you ever think that I didn’t want that? Drew, you and I are the parents to those children. I would never let another woman come in here and try to take your place. Furthermore, regardless of what you may think, Melissa is my friend. She helped me through a tough time when you were in the hospital, and she even helped us at the hearing. How could you think her feelings extend beyond a friendship?”

“Because I see the way she looks at you, Lola.” Drew stated seriously.

“Drew, I love only you. I always have and always will. You may be unable to return those feelings, but I have them nevertheless. It would be impossible for me to be with another woman given what I feel for you. Any advances from Melissa or any other woman would be harshly rebuffed.”

“Okay but do me one favor. Please don’t allow women to spend the night here. I don’t think it’s good for the kids.”

“Fine. I won’t do that any more. Are you happy now?”

“No, I’m not happy, but I’ll deal.”

“Now why are you here so early? You usually don’t come by until later.”

“I wanted to surprise the kids with pancakes. Seems like I picked the right morning. I take it you and Melissa are going out for a ride.”

“Yeah, we were, but if you would like for me to cancel, I will.”

“No. Don’t do that. Actually, I need to go down to the barn myself. I haven’t been there in awhile, and I want our employees to at least see my face, so they know I’m still around. Why don’t I do that, and then by the time I get back the kids will be up.”

Heading back into the kitchen, Lola said she would clean up the mess Drew had made in the office, so Drew headed down to the stables. Running into one of the trainers, Drew greeted him warmly. “Hey, I’ve got a question for you. Has there been a new rider here by the name of Melissa Johnston?”

“You mean Dr. Johnston?”

“That would be the one. How often is she here?”

“Once or twice a week, has been for the last couple of months.”

“Have you ever seen her go up to the house?”

“Yeah, of course, all the time.”

“What about seeing her car up in the driveway without her coming down here? Ever seen that?”

“Sure. I’d recognize that fancy sports car of hers anywhere. Why do you ask? You don’t think Lola is getting cozy with another woman while you’re at work, do you? She’s not that kind of girl, Drew. Lola is the faithful type.”

“I don’t doubt Lola’s fidelity. I just don’t think I trust the good doctor as far as I could throw her. She’s trying to put the play on my woman, and I don’t like it.” Drew grumbled.

“Well, one thing is for sure, Drew.”

“What’s that?”

“Lola is your woman, and there is nothing in the world that can change that. As long as I’ve known that girl, she’s always had her eyes on you. Now that she has you, she’s never going to let go.”

Drew just nodded as she thought about Melissa some more. Having her suspicions confirmed by her employees, left an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach, but somewhere deep inside her heart, she also knew that Lola really never would stray. She would always be available to Drew. Drew went about her business in the office before heading back up to the house. As she came in, she found her kids at the kitchen table.

“Well, Mommy, your crew is up and ready for your special breakfast. If you don’t mind, Melissa and I are going to take off now.”

“No problem. Have a good time. By the way, Melissa, how are you taking to this sport? You getting the hang of it?”

“I think I’m starting to.”

“You getting a chance to do much riding?” casually Drew inquired as she went about her work on breakfast. Drew cast a glance over her shoulder and caught the doctor’s eyes.

“Not as much as I would like.” Melissa answered holding the gaze.

“That’s too bad.”

“Well, hopefully in the future I’ll be making more regular appearances.”

Drew detected the slight challenge in the doctor’s voice. Smirking she replied, “We’ll see about that. You two have fun.”

As the two younger women left the house, Lola cast a look at her friend. “Melissa, I might be totally out of line, and if I am I’m sorry, but I can’t help but think you and Drew are having some sort of ego war. She thinks you’re coming onto me. I assured her that wasn’t the case, but I feel like she still thinks that.”

“Drew’s a smart woman, Lola.” Melissa mumbled.

“What does that mean?” Lola questioned, suddenly concerned that Drew had been right, but she had been too dense to see it.

Melissa sighed deeply. Turning to the petite blonde, she put her hands on Lola’s arms and looked into Lola’s hazel eyes. “Lola, ever since Drew came out of her coma, she’s treated you like dirt, like yesterday’s garbage just thrown to the curb. In the last few months, she’s made no attempt to rekindle the relationship you two once shared. She’s hurt you so deeply, more than you even admit, and I can’t stand to see that. From the moment I laid eyes on you, I was captivated. You are such an incredible woman, Lola, and you deserve to be treated with love, adoration, and respect. It was my job as her doctor to get her to the best health possible, but it was hard for me to see you struggling to accept the new her. You deserve better than Drew can give you now, Lola. You deserve a lover and life partner that completely supports you.”

Lola looked up at the brunette as she contemplated her words. “And you want to be the one to give me that, Melissa?”

Melissa gave a noncommittal shrug. “Only if you want me to.”

“Why did you help us at the hearing if this was the way you felt?” Lola inquired, pulling away from the doctor’s arms.

“Because I knew that’s what you wanted. You wanted Drew to have legal guardianship, and I wanted you to be happy.”

“It’s that simple?”

“It’s that simple, Lola. Isn’t that a good enough reason?”

Lola nodded slightly. “Was every moment you’ve spent with me over the last several months in an effort to get me to leave Drew for you?”

“Lola, I’ve enjoyed your company tremendously. I just thought that over the course of time you would see that Drew would never come back. I was more than willing to wait for you to come to that conclusion on your own.”

“So you were just waiting to pick up the pieces, is that it? My marriage falls a part and Dr. Johnston is there to make me all better? Were all the efforts you made on Drew’s and my behalf at the hospital fake? I mean with getting us counseling and all that?”

“No. At that time I did want you to be happy with Drew if it could work out that way, but over the past few months, it’s become obvious that Drew doesn’t want to come back. Can you really just wait around for something that’s never going to happen? Don’t you want to find happiness again?”

Lola dropped her head and kicked at the ground with her riding boot as she debated the question in her mind. After a moment she answered, “I’m not ready to give up on Drew yet. I don’t know if I’ll ever be. She means the world to me, Melissa. You have no idea how much history Drew and I have. She will never be out of my life, because she is the mother of my children, my mother’s best friend, and my sister’s godmother. There are so many levels in which our lives are entwined, and if for some reason we were to end our relationship, she would still be a part of my life. I don’t honestly think I could be with someone else.”

Melissa stepped in closer to her as she whispered, “What about last night? You see that shows me that you have already given up on Drew.”

“Why? Because I let you put your arm around me while we were watching tv? If it wasn’t you, it would’ve been whoever was there, my mom, one of Drew’s parents, one of the farmhands. I would’ve been like that with any of my friends or family. I needed a shoulder last night, because I was confused about what was going on with Drew. It wasn’t an invitation to make a move on me by any means. I’m sorry if you thought otherwise.”

Melissa sighed as she backed up a few steps. “Lola, are you honestly going to wait around for Drew forever? Can’t you see that she’s not coming back to your bed or your life? For all you know she could already be with someone else herself. She doesn’t strike me as the type to go without female companionship. What if she finds someone else? What if she already has?”

“Stop! Just stop, Melissa! I don’t want to hear any of that! Drew loves me! She just doesn’t remember it yet! She will! She’s not with anyone else!”

“How do you know?”

“Because I know her! She would tell me regardless of how much she thought it would hurt. She respects me enough to give me the truth.”

“I’m sorry, Lola. I didn’t mean to upset you. Obviously this was the wrong time to talk about this. Maybe I should just go for now.”

“That’s probably a good idea.”

“Listen, I know that you think Drew will recover eventually, but there is a chance she won’t. I’m just trying to offer you a better life than pining away for a woman that might never return your feelings. I can make you happy if you let me, Lola. I’ll wait if I have to until you’re ready to accept the facts. Drew’s a lost cause. She hasn’t remembered anything substantial since the accident, and she probably won’t at this point. You need to move on emotionally. You won’t ever be happy again until you try to find someone else.”

Lola looked at the ground again as she felt tears threaten. “I think you should go now, Melissa.” Melissa didn’t say another word as she walked away toward her car. Lola watched until the sports car turned out of the driveway as she thought about the doctor’s words. Even though she wanted to believe in Drew’s full recovery, she did have her doubts about ever being with Drew again. However even if that were the case, Lola wasn’t sure she could ever find happiness with anyone else even if Drew did.

Heading back into the house, Lola leaned down to kiss each of her children’s heads as she passed through the room on her way up the stairs. Drew thought it was strange that she was back so soon, knowing that she hadn’t gone riding by her short absence. Wondering if Lola had gotten into a fight with Melissa, she resolved to talk to her about it after breakfast.

After their meal Drew decided to take the kids out to enjoy the fall weather, so after bundling them all up, they went out into the front yard. Sitting on the porch with Emma, Drew watched her older two as they played in the leaves. They had only been outside a few minutes when Drew heard the front door open. Turning to look over her shoulder, she saw Lola. The blonde came to where she was sitting on the stoop and took a seat.

“You all right? Earlier you looked like you had lost your best friend.” Drew mentioned.

“I lost my best friend months ago, Drew.” Lola mumbled, looking out over the yard. “When you lost your memories, I lost not only my wife but my best friend in the entire world. I know you and Mom refer to each other with that title, but you really were mine over the last six years.”

Drew let the comment slide for the moment as she inquired, “Did you and Melissa get into a fight?”

“No. It wasn’t a fight really, just a difference of opinion. She thinks I should be more realistic about your recovery.”

“How so?”

“She thinks that because you haven’t remembered much, you probably won’t at this point. I just can’t bring myself to believe that, Drew. I know somewhere within you is the secret to unlocking your memories. It’s not even so much for me any more. I just want you to know who you really are again, for the sake of yourself. I can’t help but believe. That’s all I can do.”

“Well, thanks for the support.” Drew answered as she contemplated telling Lola that she had remembered more than she had admitted. Lola sighed as she hesitantly leaned into Drew, placing her head on the sheriff’s strong shoulder. Without thought Drew curved an arm around the lithe blonde in consolation. “It’s going to be all right. You’ll see.”

Part of Lola wanted to tell Drew that she had been right about Melissa’s intentions, but knowing it served no real purpose, she kept it to herself as she just enjoyed the feeling of being wrapped in the embrace of her beloved. “Drew, I want to thank you for putting such effort into the kids. I know it’s difficult for both of us sometimes, but it means a lot to me, and I’m sure it does to them as well.”

“I love my children, Lola. They are my life. Ever since the recollection of their births, I’ve felt that much closer to them.” confessed Drew, knowing that by revealing that information Lola would ask the inevitable question about them.

“You remember that? That’s wonderful. When it come back to you?”

“A couple of days ago.”

“If you remember them, does that mean you remember me?” timidly Lola inquired.

“Lola, I didn’t want to tell you about that, because I knew you would ask me that question about us. Lots of things have come back to me, but the one thing that still evades me is our real relationship. I mean I have memories that include you, but I still don’t know us. I can’t be with you the way you want me to if I don’t know who we are. I only feel friendship for you. You can’t expect me to have a sexual relationship with someone when that’s the way I feel, can you?”

Lola sighed again. She knew she wouldn’t be able to do that, so she shouldn’t demand that Drew try either. “No. I can’t expect that of you. However I guess I should at least feel lucky you don’t feel maternally for me any more. That was a little more than I could handle.” To herself she hoped that if Drew’s feelings continued to evolve they may have a chance at being together once again.

Drew smiled at her blonde companion. She knew that she truly no longer felt motherly with Lola, much to her own relief, because she knew it would be almost impossible to reconcile it with the brief sexual stirring she got every once in awhile when those hazel eyes gazed at her. Changing the conversation completely, Drew inquired, “So, have you got plans for your birthday yet? We only have a week until you’re twenty-nine. It’s the last one before the big 3-0.”

“Don’t remind me, Drew. I’m well aware of how old I’m getting.” Lola joked.

“You old? What does that say about me?” she asked with a smile.

“You’re way over the hill already, hot stuff, but that doesn’t change the fact that you are still the most desirable woman that’s ever walked the face of this earth in my opinion.” she flirted teasingly.

Drew suddenly felt a flush rising to her face at the unexpected compliment. Trying to hide it Drew said, “You’re just trying to get a good gift out of me with flattery. Seriously, what do you want?”

Lola shrugged. In her heart she knew the only thing she ever wished for was to be reunited with Drew. She wanted them to be a real family again, but she wasn’t sure if it was conceivable. Deciding to ask for something more reasonable, she stated, “Well, I’d kind of like to have an evening alone with you for my birthday. Maybe have dinner or something while Mom watches the kids. Would that be within the realm of possibilities?”

Drew shrugged. “Sure. Why not? If that’s what you really want, I’ll take you wherever you want to go. Just name the place.”

“Would you make me dinner, Drew? I’d really like it if you did. We could do it over at your place.”

“All right. Dinner it is. You tell me what you want. I’ll make anything.”

“Let me think about that for awhile.” Looking at the kids, she mentioned, “We should get them back inside. It’s a little too cold to stay out for long. I think we’re having some sort of cold front.”

Collecting the children they all moved into the living room where Jack and Libby convinced the both of them to participate in a rousing game of Candyland. Slipping off her boots, Drew stretched out on the floor on her stomach and braced up on her elbows as she helped them set up the board. Lola took a seat near her cross-legged with Emma sitting next to her on her own, so she could see the game as well. Neither adult spoke to each other directly, but Lola kept a close eye on her wife.

Unbeknownst to Drew, she was stirring the blonde’s libido to life by the way she was sprawled out on the rug. Lola studied the curvature of Drew’s back just being able to make out the definition of her cut shoulders under her tight long-sleeved t-shirt. Lowering her sights she took in the snug seat of Drew’s jeans, perfectly exhibiting the strong muscles that Lola knew were there. Drew’s legs were slightly staggered exposing the seam of her jeans and the treasure Lola recalled hiding just underneath the material. Lola was so close to Drew’s enchanting body that all she had to do was reach out to touch the frame that filled her sexual fantasies. Knowing she couldn’t deny herself the chance to touch the female Adonis, she casually leaned into Drew to support herself against Drew’s leg. The powerful thigh flexed for a fleeting moment as Drew glanced over her shoulder at the blonde, but she only gave a grin that Lola thought was incredibly sexy before returning her attentions to the game.

Drew almost jumped when she felt Lola leaning on her. Drew had been aware of their physical interaction since she arrived that morning. Seeing Melissa at the breakfast table had made her envious, and she knew she could only attribute it to her growing sexual feelings for the twenty-eight year old. Even as much as she denied it, Drew knew her physical attraction to Lola was returning, but she didn’t feel completely comfortable with it given that she couldn’t remember them together that way. Every member of their families kept telling her that she and Lola really were loving and passionate with each other, but Drew could only feel the sexual magnetism mixed with her feelings of friendship. She still didn’t feel the love they had, but she certainly was beginning to understand the blonde’s allure. Idly Drew pondered how long it took the first time to crumble to Lola’s wiles, sensing that regardless of whether she remembered Lola as her wife from the past, her current feelings for the blonde would continue to flourish. Finally trying to clear her thoughts of Lola, Drew focused on the game.

Lola participated enough to make it seem like she was paying attention, but her concentrate was really on Drew and savoring the feel of the sheriff. Even the smell of Drew’s old barn work boots that she normally detested due to their smell was enticing her, because they reminded her of Drew after the gray-haired woman had been strenuously exercising. Her lustful thoughts were broken by seeing Drew’s hand moving seemingly unconsciously over a small spot on the rug. Lola instantly remembered what had caused the stain, the fruition of their sexual relationship, further fueling the desire that had begun run through her veins. Not being able to resist trying to bring that memory back to her lover, Lola inquired, “Drew, what are you doing?”

“Hum? What do you mean?” Drew asked as she moved her blue piece around the board.

“With your hand. What are you playing with?” she prompted.

“Oh, I don’t know. There’s just this stain on the carpet here. It’s got a funny feel to the fibers. It’s weird, because it’s the only spot on this rug, even with all the drinks the kids have had in here. It kind of bothers me.”

“Funny you should mention that. You used to say that you liked it.”

“What? Why’s that? I take it you know what caused this.”

“Actually, I do know, Drew.”

“What?” she asked as she took another card to see where to move next.

“Well, where you and our son are sitting is where we first consummated our relationship.”

Drew shot her a look over her shoulder. “What?”

“You heard me.”

“You mean right here?” Drew questioned thoroughly intrigued.

“Right there, Drew, in front of a fire while it snowed outside on Valentine’s Day my senior year of high school.” Lola told her, hoping that the extra information might spark the memory.

Figuring there had to be more to the story, Drew inquired, “Why the discoloration?”

Lola grinned. Even though she knew her children couldn’t follow the conversation, she took the opportunity of answering Drew to get a little closer to the sheriff. Getting onto her knees, she crawled up to where Drew’s ear was, subtly nestling one of her legs between Drew’s as her breasts rubbed Drew’s back. Leaning into Drew’s ear she whispered, “Because you were my first and only, Drew. I was a virgin.”

Drew felt weak at the combination of Lola’s words and body against her own. Lola’s lips had faintly brushed over the rim of her ear, sparking a yearning for the younger woman. Before she could even stop it, a whine escaped her when she felt the slight grind of Lola’s pelvis against her backside as Lola’s voluptuous breasts pressed into her. Immediately her heart began pound as her breathing turned ragged at the raw sensuality of Lola’s small form on top of her. Not able to form any other words, Drew simply croaked, “Oh.”

Just then the spell was broken when Libby said, “Mama, it’s your turn.” When Lola dismounted, Drew regretted the loss of contact immediately. Looking back to the rug, her fingers ran over the spot again as the moment came to her.

Drew was poised above the eighteen year old that held her hear completely, gazing at her longingly. “I want to make love to you, Lola. I have to feel you. I want to make you the woman you’ve always wanted to be if you’ll let me.”

Taking Drew’s hand, Lola moved it into position so all Drew had to do was slide in. Holding Drew’s gaze Lola softly confessed, “I’m yours, Drew, always have been. Take me. I want to feel you inside of me.”

Drew leaned down to give Lola a deep, reassuring kiss as she made that wish come true. Lola cried out faintly as her innocence slipped away with Drew’s tender entrance. Drew shuddered at the feel of her from the inside and was humbled and honored to know she was the first to touch her this intimately.

“You’re so tight and wet.” Drew moaned. “Let me know if I begin to hurt you. I don’t want you to feel any unnecessary pain.”

Lola nodded clutching Drew’s back tighter as her muscles stretched to accommodate Drew’s gentle manipulation. Drew worked her steadily knowing the worst pain would come when she finally push through the thin barrier that separated Lola from womanhood. Every time Drew pushed against it, even in the slightest, Lola jumped in anticipation. Trying to distract her from it, Drew began to kiss over her bare torso. Lola quickly approached fulfillment, and Drew knew the moment Lola has longed for was at hand. Looking to Lola’s face, she met her hazel eyes to see the love that mirrored her own.

Drew lingered momentarily until Lola urgently begged, “Please, Drew.”

Resolve slipping away, Drew pierced through to claim her as Lola had always dreamed. Drew saw the pain in Lola’s face quickly be replaced with pleasure as spasms rocked her body, draining her. Drew remained deep within her until all the contractions subsided. They were both crying softly as she pulled out. Their wet eyes met.

“I love you, Lola Emerson.” Drew confessed.

Drew jumped, startled at the revelation that struck her. Turning onto her side, she cast a look at Lola, who for the moment was paying attention to the children. The rhythm of her heart had increased exponentially as the feelings of their first encounter overcame her. The mutual devotion and ardor surrounding the moment was overwhelming, shaking her to the core.

“Mommy, why are you crying?” Jack inquired. “It’s just a game. We can play again.” he stated reasonably.

Knowing he thought she emotions were about the end of the game, she gave him a reassuring smile. “Oh, my eyes are just tired. I didn’t sleep well last night. We can play again if you want.” she replied more for Lola’s benefit since she knew the five year old wouldn’t be able to comprehend her explanation anyway.

Lola gave Drew a smile as she patted Drew’s leg soothingly. She knew at that moment Drew had recalled exactly what she had wanted her to by the emotions playing across the older woman’s face. Deciding not to address it in front of the children, however, Lola simply returned her attention to the new game.

That evening Drew stayed for awhile after the kids had gone down for the night. Neither of them talked about what had taken place earlier that day in the living room, but there was a peace surrounding them that hadn’t been there since the accident. When Drew finally got ready to leave, Lola stopped her saying she had a gift to give her. Drew patiently waited for the blonde as she excused herself. Returning a few minutes later, Lola handed Drew a large envelope. Curiously Drew peeked into it to see a video tape that had been labeled, “Happy forty-fifth birthday, Drew. Love, Lola” as well a plastic bag of what looked like pictures.

“What’s this?” she asked.

Lola shrugged. “Hopefully it will help spur something. I didn’t give this to you earlier, because you said you felt motherly toward me, but I think you can handle it now. Let’s just say it’s a more intimate look at our relationship. I don’t want to force you to look at this if you really are against it but just consider it.”

“What’s on the tape?”

“Well, it’s your present from your forty-fifth birthday just like it says, at least the first part is. The second part is your reaction to your gift. It’s not a PG or even PG-13 feature. I’ll just say that as a warning.” Lola admitted with an embarrassed flush. “I don’t want to push you, Drew. I just want you to have the resources to remember us if you want to try.”

Seeing the adorable blush on Lola’s face, Drew caught on to what she was saying. However after what she had recalled that day, she felt safe pushing a little farther. “Would you give it an R rating?” she asked flirtingly as she moved into Lola’s space.

Gamely Lola replied, “More like triple X because of the girl on girl action. Just the way you like it.”

At the moment Drew desperately hoped Lola’s answer meant that the younger woman was the star of the feature. Unsure of whether to stay longer to be with this woman that was quickly pushing her toward arousal or to rush home to see what was on the tape, Drew simply stood there for another moment. “Well, I guess I better get out of here. I’m sure you’re about ready to go to bed yourself. I’ll see you and the kids tomorrow.” Drew finally stated evenly.

“Okay. Sounds good.” Lola replied knowing the sensual moment was over for the time being.

When Drew got back to her place, she put the envelope Lola had given her on the coffee table before going into the kitchen to retrieve a beer. Taking her beverage back to the living room, she fell onto the couch. For several minutes she just stared at the gift Lola had presented her, debating if she was ready to view whatever might be on the tape. Curiously she picked up the envelope and dug out the pictures, figuring it would be safest to look at those first before committing herself to watching the film.

“Oh my God.” she mumbled as she stared at the first photo of her wife dressed in a bikini consisting of small patches covering the most vital parts of her body lounging on their back deck. The next photograph was of Lola sans top grinning wickedly at the camera. Even though Drew wanted to linger on the picture, there were a few more, so she flipped to the next one in which it was obvious Lola was only wearing a brilliant smile even though her legs were strategically positioned to keep from being totally indecent. Moving on the next set, Drew realized they were of Lola in skimpy lingerie lounging on various pieces of furniture in the master bedroom at the ranch.

Drew tried to control her breathing at the sight of Lola’s beauty laid bare in front of a camera. Taking a big swig of her beer, she moaned as she recalled the photo shoots. The one of the bathing suit was the summer just after they were married before either of them knew Lola was pregnant with Jack, but the lingerie was fairly recent, only a month after Emma’s birth while Lola was still trying to recover from the delivery. Drew chuckled as she thought about the occasion in greater detail.

Emma was only five weeks old, and even though Drew and Lola were totally in love with the new addition to their family, Drew was already wanting to venture back into their sexual relationship. Even as much as Lola wanted to as well, Emma’s delivery had been more strenuous than the previous two, leaving her out of commission longer than either of them would’ve liked. However in an effort to give her wife some relief, Lola had suggested Drew take the sensual photographs in order to give the older woman something to fantasize about until they could once again be intimate.

Putting the pictures aside, Drew picked up the video tape. Knowing she couldn’t resist the temptation, Drew put the tape in and turned on the tv. She knew whatever was on there could only serve to further spark her memories of her lover, so she got comfortable on the sofa to enjoy the film. When the movie began, Lola was standing in front of the camera in what looked like her childhood room, but even before there was any action, Drew sensed where things were going when she heard the sexy music. Within moments Drew was riveted by screen as Lola revealed her form to the camera before performing a solo exploration of all of Drew’s favorite features on Lola’s body. Drew felt her own body pulsing with sexual energy as she continued to watch the film. Right before the screen went black, Lola’s last words were wishing her a happy birthday. Drew was tempted to rewind it, but remembering Lola saying something about a second part, she simply waited.

After an extended period of nothing, the screen came to life again. The new location was in their master bedroom, but Drew had to think about the angle of the camera, finally realizing it had to have been on top of the dresser aimed right at the bed. The bedside lamps were on low setting a romantic ambiance, but as Lola suddenly entered the screen dragging Drew behind her, Drew realized she was also a participant. Drew could tell she was hesitant at first, but Lola was persuasive with her promises of how much Drew would later love to watch the film of them together. Even though the camera caught the whole scene on tape, Drew barely even registered it as her mind took her back to the encounter.

Drew was shy about being in front of the camcorder at first, but Lola’s words and kisses were overpowering, making Drew finally succumb to her overwhelming need to possess the woman in her arms. Taking control of the situation, Drew made quick work of their clothes as she pulled Lola down on top of her with their heads at the footboard to optimize the angle of the camera on Lola’s body. Knowing the younger woman wouldn’t be able to resist the urge to straddle her as she often did when they were in that position, Drew hoped the camcorder could at least film her favorite part of their lovemaking, Lola’s face as Drew pushed her over the climatic edge. The more involved they became with each other, Drew forgot about being filmed as she guided her wife to the pinnacle of pleasure several times.

When the sex was over, Drew was about to stop the tape, but she noticed that she gently moved Lola under the covers before joining her, wrapping her strong arms around the petite blonde as they merely talked. They discussed the arrival of Libby and then moved on to considering a family vacation. The tenderness of them lying in each other’s arms talking about life moved Drew more than anything she had seen on the tape, because she finally saw who they really were as a couple. Obviously they had forgotten about the camera, because it continued to roll even when Libby’s cry broke them out of their embrace.

Seeing Lola exit the room, she returned with the little girl a few moments later. Drew had moved to sit up against the headboard and opened her legs so that Lola could sit between them. Lola reclined against Drew as she brought Libby to her naked breast to feed. Drew watched herself adoringly stroke the heads of both blondes whispering endearments of affection and adoration to her girls. Once Libby had been satisfied, Lola returned her to her room and came back to the bed. From there the conversation continued as they gently exchanged kisses before once again becoming totally involved with each other. However the second time Drew noted was drastically different than when they first entered the room and what she was watching was a true expression of her deepest feelings of love for the woman she held in her arms as they touched just to feel each other. It seemed neither of them were looking to bring the other fulfilment and that it was just a byproduct of their caressing. This was not sex like the earlier passionate display but the meeting and merging of two hearts, bodies, and souls.

Drew could feel her eyes begin to water for the second time that day, because after such a long absence she finally remembered her beloved Lola. Inspired by what she had just seen, Drew began to devise a plan to share the news with the love of her life. Picking up her guitar from its case, she began to strum as the words and melody of her heart poured itself out into song.

Continued: Chapter 12