~ An Affair of Love ~
by S. Anne Gardner



Disclaimers: This story contains violence, adult situations, and same sex relationships, which at times are VERY graphic. If this is not suitable for you, please don't read any further. It also contains some bad language (surprise, surprise, surprise!). If one had to put a rating on this story, it would be a definite "R."

All characters found in this story are the creation of S. Anne Gardner and are her property exclusively.

Comments are appreciated. Please email your comments to sanneol7@aol.com.


Part Two

An hour later Gabriella went downstairs looking for Diana.

"Hello."

Gabriella turned around and came face to face with Chaz

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Blayne suddenly felt arms around her and tried pulling away only to give into the need to be held.

Diana held her tightly. Never in her life did she ever imagine finding Blayne so vulnerable and distraught. Her big sister was nothing if not strong and in control all the time. She had come upstairs looking for Gabriella only to find that she was not in her room and when she passed Blayne's door she stopped when she thought she had heard crying.

Diana walked into a scene she would never have imagined or ever forget. Blayne was crouched in a fetal position, half-naked on the floor.

"What happened?" Diana asked gently as she held her sister tightly. "It's okay. You're going to be okay."

Blayne only cried all the harder.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Looking for me?" Asked Chaz with his best smile.

"Umm, no, but I'm glad to see you," Gabriella said amicably. "Have you seen Diana? She wanted to talk to me and I said I would meet her down here."

"She was here earlier. I think she went upstairs to talk to Blayne."

Chaz noticed that Gabriella seemed nervous for a moment then just smiled and walked towards the library. He followed her with his eyes as she entered it and the wheels in his head began to turn. Something is going on here and I am going to find out what it is. If she thinks she can come in here and take a piece of money that should go to us she has some surprises coming.

Chaz went looking for his mother. She would help him. Surely she didn't want to see Arthur's bastard take anything away from her children.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Arthur looked up as soon as Gabriella walked into the library.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I just wanted to get a book."

"No, no my dear, come on in." He gestured for her to get whatever she wanted. "I'm glad you decided to stay. Please, talk to me a while."

Gabriella sat close by. "You said I could ask you questions."

"Yes, of course." He sat down and waited.

"Why now? I mean, I know that you are sick, but why?"

"When you are dying you can't lie to yourself anymore," Arthur said sadly.

"Lie to yourself? I don't understand."

"When there are no tomorrows your life has to be looked at….I guess I finally looked at myself. Of all of them, Blayne was the hardest on me." He smiled and looked away. "She doesn't let me get away with what I did, not even now. And she is right. That's the difference between her and I." Arthur remained silent for a moment before looking at Gabriella.

"And what is it that Blayne doesn't cut you any slack on?"

"Honor."

"Honor?"

"I have been very much aware of that lately. I was a cad where your mother was concerned," Arthur said frankly.

"A cad? Is that what you think you were?" Gabriella got up and turned her back to him. "You promised undying love and you got her pregnant then left her. You were a cad? That is the least of what you were." Gabriella turned around to face him as she finished her accusation.

He looked down in shame. "You sound like Blayne."

"What?" Gabriella was thrown for a moment.

"Nothing. You are quite right. I didn't think of her or you at all." Arthur looked at her without blinking for a moment.

"How could you hurt her? Even now….she wanted to know if…" Gabriella sat down visibly upset. "My mother is the kindest, most loving woman I know."

Arthur sat again. Elena still thought of him. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back.

"Does she hate me?"

Gabriella looked up and stared at him.

He then looked up into his daughter's eyes. "Does she? Does she hate me?"

"My mother doesn't hate anyone." Gabriella saw the pain register in Arthur's eyes before he got up and walked towards the window with his back to her. "How could you hurt her?" She asked him softly.

"I did love her….I want you to know that. She was the loveliest thing I had ever seen. I ….wish things might have been different, Gabriella. I'm sorry," he finished with regret. "You will never know how sorry I am."

"Perhaps I'm not the only one you should apologize to."

Arthur turned around to face his daughter. "Would she see me?"

"Well, you do have a weapon don't you?" Gabriella said sarcastically.

Arthur waited perplexed.

"Send Blayne." She walked out of the library to let him think on what she had just said. Before she walked out she could tell that the last jab had hit home and hurt him.

She was angry. She told herself she had the right to be. All that he had given her up to now was heartache. And she was not about to cut him any slack because he was dying.

Gabriella closed the library door behind her and suddenly it hit her. Her father….her father was dying. Did it matter? Yes, it did. She was more confused then before and more troubled. When she looked up her eyes met with ones filled with anger and accusation.

For a moment Gabriella was frozen on the spot by the coldness she saw in Blayne's eyes. And just as suddenly they turned away from her. Blayne walked towards the breakfast room without even acknowledging her presence. Diana that had been walking closely behind her stopped for a moment when she saw the exchange between them.

Diana saw as Blayne walked into the breakfast room then she walked over to Gabriella. "Everything okay?"

Gabriella looked down at her hands then up at Diana. "Yes, thank you."

"Are you and Blayne fighting again?"

"No, I don't know….Blayne is …." Gabriella trailed off.

"She's really okay. She just seems a little off kilter. Besides the news about father….she's …..I think something is going on with her. So don't be too mad at her. She really is all right. Blayne is Blayne. I think we get angry at her because she is just so right all the time….but when I'm in trouble she is the one I call," Diana said honestly.

Gabriella looked away. "I guess I just looked to myself. I never had anyone to …" She trailed off.

"Well, you do now don't you?" Diana smiled and slid her arm through Gabriella as she pulled her towards the breakfast room. "You have at least one sister."

Gabriella looked at Diana and smiled tenderly at her. "Yes, I have a sister."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

For the next two days Blayne and Gabriella stayed well away from one another and their estrangement did not go unnoticed. Chaz in particular seemed happiest of all not missing any opportunity to be with Gabriella.

Gabriella mentioned over breakfast that she would be leaving early the next morning which inwardly made Blayne breathe easier than she had in the last two days.

"Must you go so soon?" Diana asked as disappointment obviously showed in her demeanor.

"Yes, I've been away from home too long. But, you will come and visit soon, I hope?" Gabriella finished saying with a smile as her hand covered Diana's.

"Yes, I want to meet my niece and nephew," Diana answered excitedly.

Gabriella turned towards Arthur. "I will speak to my children…then I will call you."

Arthur smiled and nodded.

"Well, I hope I am invited to see you soon as well," Chaz said with his most charming voice.

"Of course, Chaz," Gabriella said cordially.

Abigail did not fail to notice, as Arthur did, that Blayne was the only one that had seemed oblivious to their conversation.

"Someday I would like to meet them as well my dear," Abigail said genuinely.

"Yes, I would like that too," said Gabriella honestly. For the last two days Abigail had been so kind to her. It hadn't been what she said so much as how she said it and the honesty of her emotions seemed to come through.

"Does that mean you will be leaving us as well, Blayne?" Diana asked as she turned her attention to her older sister.

"Yes, I have been away from the office for too long. If you all excuse me I have some phone calls to make." Blayne got up and walked out of the room.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Blayne had called her office advising them that she would most likely be in the next day. She went over some correspondence over the phone with her PA and when the knocking on the door broke her concentration the irritation showed in her voice.

"Come in!"

Gabriella walked in slowly and closed the door behind her.

Blayne met her eyes for a moment before continuing to speak to her PA on the phone. "Matt can you hold a moment?" She then covered the receiver and directed her comment to Gabriella who was still standing by the door. "What do you want?" Blayne did not bother to hide her dissatisfaction at being interrupted.

"I wanted…I need to talk to you before…"

Blayne then uncovered the phone. "Matt, I'll call you back." She then hung up the phone and faced Gabriella from the power position behind her desk.

"I…" Gabriella found it hard to speak.

"I don't have all day. Is there something I can do for you?"

"Yes, you can come here and stop making this harder than it is for me," Gabriella said as she began to shake.

Blayne only waited a moment before she got up and started walking slowly to the woman standing nervously only a few feet away from her. She had told herself over and over again that Gabriella would not have the chance to disrupt her psyche again and yet here she was doing exactly as she had been asked, walking towards her. Walking to what? Blayne stood a mere few inches away from Gabriella still fighting to keep some distance. Suddenly, she could see the tears that Gabriella's eyes held and when Gabriella walked into her arms she only resisted for a moment then her arms slowly came up and held tightly to her. A moment later Blayne pushed Gabriella away still trying to find reason in the insanity she knew this was.

"No…" Blayne said softly more to herself than to Gabriella.

It was futile to fight her body, Blayne told herself, as she tried desperately to. As Gabriella's tears silently rolled down her face her mouth came up and when she moaned, "Blayne…" there was no resistance left in Blayne, no resistance at all to the plea. Blayne's mouth came down quickly and took the invitation offered and she was not sure who's moan she heard next Gabriella's or her own.

There was another knock on the door and Blayne pulled away almost as the door opened. Diana walked in and found them looking away from one another. Blayne turned away and walked back to her desk and Gabriella began to wipe her face.

"You weren't fighting again were you?" Diana asked them both in exasperation.

Blayne still had her back to her as she leaned on the desk in front of her. "Diana, please not now," she said shakily. Diana looked in her direction noticing the unsteadiness of Blayne's response. "Diana, I need a moment to speak to Gabriella," Blayne said softly, trying to catch her breath. "Please leave us for a few minutes, please."

Diana looked towards Gabriella. It was obvious to her that something was wrong. Gabriella had indeed been crying since she could still notice the moisture in her eyes and the way her hands shook. "Gabriella, are you all right?"

"For God's sake!" Blayne turned around now filled with anger. "She is fine. Diana please, just give us a moment, all right!"

"I'm not going anywhere until I know that you two aren't fighting again. So don't try and be a bully. It won't work with me big sister," Diana said as she put her hands on both her hips.

"Diana, we aren't fighting. Please, I need to speak to Blayne," Gabriella said softly.

"What is it with you two?" Diana asked in exasperation. "Why can't you two get along…. Gabriella, why are you crying?"

"Diana! Please leave us for a few minutes please." Blayne turned around and faced her.

"Blayne, I am…."

"Diana, please, it's all right," Gabriella said reassuringly.

Diana looked from one to the other. "Diana!" Blayne was loosing her patience.

"Okay, okay."

Diana walked out leaving the door open.

"Close the damn door, Diana!" Blayne yelled.

The door closed immediately. Then Blayne gave Gabriella her full attention but now there was palatable distance between them.

Gabriella was the one that walked to her and held Blayne to her. "Don't be angry anymore, please," she pleaded.

"Gabriella, this is a mistake..."

Gabriella then kissed her knowing that this physical connection if nothing else was the one thing that neither of them could fight against. And Blayne responded, as she knew she would.

Blayne's hands caressed her body as her mouth traveled down her throat. "Gabriella…Oh God, Gabriella."

The phone began to ring as someone knocked yet again on the door.

"Damn!" Blayne growled. As the door was opening she reached for the phone.

This time it was not Diana but Arthur who walked in. Gabriella turned away as Blayne began to speak into the receiver. "Matt? I said I would…." She began to listen.

Arthur walked up to Gabriella who did not seem to want to meet his eyes. He was experienced enough to now know for a fact that there was something going on between them. Of that he was now sure.

"Gabriella dear, I need to speak to Blayne, I need to speak to her alone."

Blayne met Gabriella's eyes as she still listened to the telephone call. "Matt, schedule a meeting with them for next week and call the London office. I want them in this too. I'll call you back within the hour. Good job, Matt." She hung up. "Arthur, Gabriella and I are in the middle of something."

"Your husband called, he needs to speak to you about your dinner party scheduled for tomorrow," Arthur said to Gabriella but the hardest blow of the statement was visible in Blayne's face, as he knew it would be. Blayne turned her back to them as Gabriella walked out of the room without saying a word.

Blayne closed her eyes tightly. I am such a fool, she told herself. She has a husband…whom she runs to. And I am standing here like a…

"Blayne," Arthur waited for her to turn and face him. When she didn't turn around he said her name again. "Blayne!"

"What!" She said irritably as she turned around.

"Stay away from her."

"I didn't….she is the one that ….she's married, as you said Arthur." Blayne repeated as she walked around the desk and sat down. "I need to call the office. Is there anything else you wanted to discuss?"

"I…. No, except that I wanted to see if you might want to go out on the boat with me this Sunday," Arthur asked. They had always gone out on the boat at least once whenever she visited. Their love of sailing was something that they had always shared and he hoped even under these uncomfortable circumstances they would again.

"No, I have to be in LA on Tuesday and I have to get everything ready for a meeting that we are scheduling with London," she said as she picked up the phone.

"All right. Perhaps soon then." Arthur walked out leaving her to her work. He had lost her and he knew it. How had he managed to loose control of everything?

"Arthur? Is everything all right?" Abigail asked him as he walked out of the Library.

"Yes, yes it is my dear."

Two hours later Blayne walked out into the gardens from the Library. She needed to find something to hold onto. Why had she suddenly lost control of herself? Blayne Samantha Anberville had always been her own self-sufficient world. She had loved people but never really needed them. And now someone had appeared out of nowhere and somehow in a matter of hours, because if she was honest with herself, Blayne had to admit that she had been under Gabriella's control after that first moment that they had breathed the same air. And that realization more than anything else in her life made her tremble. Her world was dependent on another human being and she didn't want it to be.

Blayne walked in silence thinking and regretting every step she had taken ever since she had met Gabriella Matheson.

She suddenly became aware of voices and walked tentatively towards them. Blayne came upon Chaz and Gabriella sitting in a nearby bench. She couldn't exactly hear what was being said but when she saw Gabriella quickly rise and Chaz grabbing her by the arm and pulling her towards him nothing else seemed to matter. Blayne felt an unfamiliar heat fill her body and an anger that began to take over her senses.

Why should I do anything? She asked herself. This worked until she realized that Gabriella was not welcoming the attentions that Chaz seemed to be intent on giving her. When Gabriella pushed him away and he refused to release her, Blayne's resolve disappeared and her feet could not get her there fast enough.

Chaz felt the impact of her before he actually saw her coming. He landed hard on his back as Blayne grabbed Gabriella and pulled her to her so that she would not fall as well.

"Are you all right?" Blayne asked as she looked deeply into her eyes. "Did he hurt you?"

Before Gabriella could answer Chaz blurted out the inevitable. "Oh, so that's how it is isn't it? Now it's quite obvious," he said as he started getting up, dusting the dirt from his clothes.

"Shut up, Chaz!" Blayne threatened.

"Or you'll what? Throw me down again? I don't think so. This time you are the one that's going to hit the ground after I take you out, you sick fucking dyke!"

Blayne was about to strike him when Gabriella's hold on her tightened. "Don't let him goad you. Leave it be Blayne, please! Leave it be."

"Hiding behind your dyke friend?" He taunted her.

Gabriella could not hold her as Blayne threw her whole self into Chaz. They both landed on the ground. She managed to hit him hard on the face before he threw her off. Blayne landed hard on her back and for a moment the wind seemed to be knocked out of her.

"Chaz! No!" Gabriella screamed.

Chaz was suddenly above Blayne and about to hit her when his fist stopped in mid air as he heard the anger in Arthur's voice behind him.

"Don't you dare strike her!" Arthur demanded.

Chaz turned at that moment and Blayne hit him hard on the chest. "You son of a bitch!"

Arthur pulled her off Chaz and Gabriella went over to her and held her back.

"Enough!" Gabriella said to Blayne.

"Chaz, go inside. I will talk to you later." Arthur left no room for argument.

Chaz looked towards Blayne. "Sick bitch!"

"Chaz! Go!" Arthur insisted.

As Arthur watched Chaz walking away Gabriella directed her attention to Blayne.

"Are you all right? Did he hurt you?" She caressed Blayne's face softly.

Blayne pulled away from her. She hated herself for what she had just done. She had brawled like an animal over a woman! She ran her fingers through her hair as she walked over to the bench and sat down.

"Blayne?" Gabriella sat next to her and slowly tried touching her again. Blayne moved away slightly.

"Leave me alone," Blayne said softly as she closed her eyes and tried to disappear.

"Did he hurt you?" Gabriella asked again softly.

"No," Blayne finally answered as her eyes opened and turned to the woman sitting next to her. They both just looked at each other as Arthur watched the scene in front of him unfold.

Gabriella's hand again went out and this time Blayne did not stop her. Her eyes closed as Gabriella's hand caressed her face softly.

Suddenly, Blayne got up and looked down at the woman sitting on the bench. "I have to go…"

"I will walk her back." Arthur finally spoke.

Blayne looked in his direction as if suddenly remembering that he was there. She looked down then at Gabriella again. She was about to say something then seemed to think better of it.

Blayne walked away without looking back.

Gabriella watched her as she saw the distance once again growing and growing between them.

"What happened?" Arthur brought her back to the present.

Gabriella turned towards him. "Chaz…he tried to bestow affections that I didn't want. Blayne must have seen him from somewhere and stopped him. They…I thought he was going to really hurt her." Gabriella looked away.

"I will deal with Chaz, don't you worry. Are you all right?" Arthur took a few steps closer to her.

"Yes…No, I …everything seems to be…" Gabriella trailed off.

"You've had a lot of shocks lately. It's understandable. And Blayne's behavior of late hasn't helped."

"Why do you automatically assume that she is to blame for everything?" Gabriella sounded angry.

Arthur surprised her by saying. "Because she is too much like me."

"But, she's not you."

"You're right, of course. Maybe I don't want her to make the same mistakes." Arthur finally admitted.

"She said you two had talked about me. What about?" Gabriella wanted to know exactly what had been discussed and this was the perfect opportunity.

"I told her to stay away from you. Blayne…Blayne is confused right now," Arthur said vaguely.

"Confused?"

"Yes, she is experiencing feelings she shouldn't," Arthur looked at his daughter.

"What feelings?"

"To do with you" Arthur seemed embarrassed.

"Anger is understandable."

"It's not anger."

"Then what?"

"Inappropriate feelings."

"She told you this?" Gabriella stood up.

"It wasn't exactly like that."

"What was it then?"

"Gabriella, I don't think…"

"You started this. What did she say to you?" Gabriella was really angry now. She felt betrayed by Blayne and furious at the audacity of the man in front of her for interfering and making decisions about her life.

"Gabriella, this is not something that I think…"

"You started this. You seem to think you have a right to interfere in my life. You have obviously done so. I don't need you to run interference for me. I am used to looking after myself." Gabriella was furious.

"Blayne had no right to push herself on you. She clearly told me that you did not welcome her advances. She can be very insistent." Arthur tried to explain.

"How dare you assume that I can't defend myself! I have news for you, I have been defending myself without you my whole life. It's too late now, father. Now, I don't need you." Gabriella's eyes challenged him.

"I just wanted to protect you…" Arthur said softly.

"What makes you think I want protecting." Arthur's eyes quickly came up to meet his daughters. Clearly, he had misread all the signs. Gabriella was not a victim, rather it would seem she was an active participant. He had been wrong about this as well. He had naturally assumed that Blayne had been the aggressor, and to some extent maybe she had been but now looking at his daughter it was all too clear. Gabriella was the strong one here. She was more his daughter than even she knew. And Blayne… Blayne would be the one who would be hurt.

"I think it's time I went home," Gabriella suddenly said as she walked away leaving Arthur alone in the garden with yet another realization.

Arthur sat down on the bench. He seemed quite old as he sat there; an incredible sadness began to show on his face. Now he knew what would happen. He knew exactly what would happen.

********************* Gabriella left that night. The cab pulled up to the house and her bags were placed in the trunk. She walked up to the door that the cab driver was holding open for her then suddenly stopped before getting in. She turned and met a set of eyes that held her own for a moment before she turned and entered the cab.

Arthur had stood by the front door and turned to see Blayne standing by the window that Gabriella had looked towards before getting into the cab. She had not bothered to look towards Arthur to say goodbye.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Vivian?" Gabriella opened the door wider to allow her cousin to come in.

"Hi," Vivian said as she passed Gabriella.

"Did we have plans for today?" Gabriella asked as she closed the door and followed her cousin into the living room.

"No," she answered as she sat down.

Gabriella sat on the other end of the same sofa her cousin sat on.

"Well, it's nice to see you Viv."

"How did it go? And why didn't you tell me?" Vivian waited for an answer. "And when were you going to tell me? You've been back over 48 hours."

"How?"

"Tia Elena was besides herself."

Gabriella ran her fingers through her hair.

"I had a lot of…there have been…I'm so confused Viv," Gabriella finally said as she sat down next to her cousin.

"She told me all about it Gabriella…I'm sorry. I think Mom is still in shock."

Gabriella nodded.

"How was he?" Vivian asked as she put her legs under herself facing Gabriella on the sofa.

"I don't know…you can't know anything about someone in a few…" Gabriella didn't finish the sentence. Blayne suddenly filled her thoughts. She got up and walked towards a window. " I mean…you can't make life changing decisions…." She ran her fingers through her hair again in exasperation.

Gabriella turned towards her cousin; her face showing all the fears and uncertainties she was feeling within. "Oh Viv, I met someone."

Vivian blinked twice in surprise then got up from the sofa. "You what? Wait! Wait! You mean…?"

Gabriella began to pace around the room nervously. "Oh Viv, what a mess. I never thought…I mean I…" Her control began to slip.

"Holy shit," Vivian said in a trance. Vivian then noticed her usually composed cousin fidgeting nervously. "Gabriella?"

Gabriella turned towards her. Vivian was surprised to see the tear filled eyes looking so miserable and lost. She immediately walked over to her cousin and put her arms around her. "Oh Christ Gabriella, you're scaring me," Vivian said as she held her tighter.

After awhile they both sat down. Gabriella's eyes avoided Vivian.

Vivian placed her hands over Gabriella's. "Talk to me. You and I have always confided in each other. Remember when I cut math in high school and mom found out?"

Gabriella looked up with a smile as tears rolled down her face. Vivian tightened her hands around her cousin's, encouraging her to talk.

"Oh sweetie, it's going to be okay, tell me," Vivian coaxed.

Gabriella suddenly got up. "No it won't. Nothing will ever be okay."

Vivian tried another approach. "Well, we can't always control our feelings, Gabriella. Why don't you tell me about it."

"I can't…" Gabriella put her arms protectively around herself.

"You are not the only woman to have an affair. It happens." Vivian insisted. "It's not something that women plan on; but it happens."

Gabriella remained silent.

"Look if it's that important…Jesus! divorce your husband. I think he's an asshole anyway."

Gabriella still remained silent.

"This is more than an affair isn't it?" Vivian asked cautiously.

Gabriella looked up at her and again tears ran down her face.

"Oh Gabriella," Vivian realized that this was really serious. Something was really wrong.

"I couldn't stop it, Vivian. It was stronger than I was." Gabriella covered her mouth to control the sob. "Oh my God, what am I going to do?"

Vivian got up and tried to console her cousin again. "Then maybe this is a good thing."

"No!" Gabriella became agitated again and took a few steps away from her.

"Is it only one sided?"

Gabriella shook her head.

"Then you can make it work. A divorce won't be easy but…"

"I can't."

"Why not? If you want him so much and he wants you."

"It's not that simple." Gabriella murmured softly barely above a whisper.

"I know it's not honey. The kids would understand. They are great kids."

"Oh God." Gabriella covered her mouth again.

"Is he married?" Vivian dreaded asking.

"No."

"Does he want a relationship with you?" Vivian couldn't understand so she kept on fishing for answers.

Gabriella nodded. "I wanted just to stay in those arms for the rest of my life." She closed her eyes as tears escaped them. "I've never wanted anyone like…" Gabriella said miserably.

"If he wants you too Gabriella, then why not?"

"There is no he, Vivian!" Gabriella turned and looked her straight in the eyes without avoiding them now.

"I don't understand. You said…"

"Blayne is Arthur's step daughter…"

"I don't understand…" Vivian was really confused. Then suddenly Gabriella could tell that her words had finally hit home.

Gabriella sat down avoiding her cousin's eyes.

Vivian sat down as well opposite her. The news had caught her off guard for a moment and she remained silent.

Gabriella looked up towards her then down again.

Vivian shook her head. "You say she feels the same?" She asked softly.

Gabriella nodded still looking down.

"You said you had an affair…you mean you….?" Vivian trailed off not knowing exactly how to pose the question.

Gabriella got up suddenly and walked towards the window again. She stood looking out.

Where are you Blayne? Gabriella closed her eyes and leaned her head back before saying, "Yes, I slept with her."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Get out of my sight!" Arthur yelled at the top of his lungs.

"Father…" Chaz appealed to Arthur's sense of familial responsibility.

"I'm only your father when it's convenient to you." Arthur put some distance between him and Chaz in exasperation.

"I admit I acted badly. How many times can I say I'm sorry!"

Arthur faced him with disbelief written all over his face. "Bad judgment?"

"Yes, bad judgment. I admit it father."

"Chaz you accosted my daughter and you were about to strike Blayne, your sister, when I showed up! That's more than bad judgment." Arthur ranted as he paced the room. "It's time that you grew up, Chaz."

"Father…"

Arthur turned to face him as he stopped and faced his son. "I won't be around to pull you out of things any more Chaz." Arthur felt and looked tired.

"I can help Blayne in the company."

Arthur looked at Chaz and the surprise of what he had just heard was evident in his face.

"I know that I have to take charge of my life. I have done nothing else but think about what a disappointment I've been to you all night father. I want to try." Chaz implored.

Arthur knew that this was probably some kind of rouse on Chaz's part but he was also hopeful that his son actually might mean what he had just said.

Arthur turned around and walked towards a chair by the fireplace and sat down in contemplation.

Chaz walked up to him and stood next to him. "I won't disappoint you this time father."

"All right, Chaz. I'll talk to Blayne." Arthur finally said.

Chaz smiled. "You won't regret it. I promise."

"All right my boy. All right." Arthur sounded tired. He let his head fall back on the chair as Chaz left the room.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Blayne?"

"Make it fast Diana, I'm on my way out," Blayne said impatiently into the telephone.

"I didn't even know you were leaving."

"I'm sorry…..I should have told you. I had some business come up that I had to take care of immediately. As a matter of fact I'm on my way to the airport."

"Where are you going?" Diana kept the conversation going.

"London." Blayne said as she was going through some papers on her desk.

"I can meet you there," Diana said hopefully.

"What?" Blayne looked up.

"Well, I thought I might meet you there. There is so much I want to talk to you about. You are the only one that I can talk to this about."

"Diana is something wrong?" Blayne asked rushed.

"No, I mean…well, I can't talk to Daddy or Mother. And Chaz…well, you know how Chaz is."

"What is it?" Blayne looked at her watch. She was running late and yet she felt guilty about just hanging up on Diana.

"It's Gabriella…"

"Oh God…can we… I mean….I'm running late, Diana. What about Gabriella?" Blayne sounded more sarcastic than she had meant to.

"Hey, I thought you two had made up." Diana blurted out.

"We…we aren't fighting. It's….what about Gabriella, Diana?" Blayne ran her fingers through her hair.

How can I do this? I can't do this! Blayne's resolve seemed to be quickly vanishing. "Diana, I can't do this right now. Please, give me a little space right now okay?"

Diana could hear the frailty in Blayne's voice and she didn't understand it. Again she was filled with feelings of dread. "Blayne? Are you okay?"

Blayne closed her eyes.

"You can always talk to me you know. You don't have to be the strong one all the time," Diana said softly.

Blayne's eyes remained closed. "I can't…"

"Okay."

"Diana…it's not that…" Blayne tried to say then just trailed off.

"When you're ready."

"Thanks."

"So? London then?" Diana asked hopefully.

"Yes." Blayne smiled. "Yes, London."

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Gabriella found the discussion with her cousin incredibly draining. Vivian had obviously been completely surprised. They agreed to meet again the next day. It was almost a relief to both of them when Vivian had remembered she had planned on having lunch with a friend.

Gabriella went to her studio and uncovered the piece she had begun to working on before leaving. She wet the clay and began to mold it. She never noticed the time; her mind was completely focused on the piece in front of her. Her every touch and was an extension of a part of her and it took her by surprise when her mind caught up with what her hands had begun what seemed like a lifetime ago. The clay had come to life and she as she stared at it she felt the inevitable pull.

"Who is she?" a male voice said from behind her.

Gabriella gasped and turned around. "God, you scared me," she said to her husband as she breathed in deeply.

"Sorry. Who is she?" He asked again.

Gabriella turned to face the image that even now called out to her. "No one you know…" She covered the figure with the cloth next to it and turned to face him again. "Why are you home so early?" She asked as she looked towards the clock on the wall.

"I thought you and I should talk," he said pulling a chair over.

"Talk?"

"Well, you were away for a week. You haven't been yourself since you got back. I want to know what's going on."

"I can't. The kids…" Gabriella said getting up.

"I called your mother. She will be picking them up for you. I told her I would pick them up later." He was firm.

"You always take care of everything." Gabriella could not keep the resentment from her voice.

"I like to have things spelled out. Yes. The dinner part, was a disaster. It was as if you weren't even there. What's going on with you?"

She walked over to a counter and began to wash her hands under the sink.

"I went to Massachusetts to meet my father." She turned around, sat down a few feet away from him. "It's complicated."

"Obviously. I think you should explain, don't you?"

She got up and began pacing stopping abruptly. Gabriella turned and looked towards her husband. Her eyes searched his, looking for something. And then sadly she looked away.

Why couldn't it be you? She thought, shutting her eyes.

"I am the daughter of Arthur Aston-Carlyle." She said sadly and looked towards him yet again.

Say something and comfort me …Take me in your arms and tell me its going to be okay. she thought to herself and waited. Take me in your arms and make me love you. Make me forget.

"You're kidding." Joseph said in disbelief. "The shipping Arthur Aston-Carlyle?"

Gabriella nodded.

"Wow," he said as he got up and walked past her.

Gabriella closed her eyes as he did.

Blayne! Her soul screamed.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Blayne had hung up the phone, after speaking with Diana, and sat down behind her desk.

Gabriella… She thought as she leaned her head back and closed her eyes. Traitor! How could you leave me like this? Damn you! Damn you!

Blayne felt an incredible pain in her chest and breathed deeply. She could almost hear Gabriella calling her name. "I don't want this. I don't want this!" She got up quickly and picking up her briefcase walked out of her office.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"I don't understand. How? I mean…"

"My mother knew him in Cuba," Gabriella said as she looked down. She felt tired and didn't really want to go into all the details now, but she also knew that there was really no choice now. Joseph would not let up until he knew everything.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"It all happened so fast. You were away. I…. I'm still not sure about anything, Joseph. " She trailed off.

"Are you his daughter or not?"

"Jesus! Leave me alone!" Gabriella began pacing. "I'm so confused right now I don't know whether I'm coming or going. Stop! Just stop okay?"

"Gabriella, calm down," he said as he came closer to her. "Let's take this one step at a time."

"Why don't you listen?" She asked sadly. Joseph seemed confused and she continued. "Why can't you know what I need? Why don't you see me?" Tears rolled down her face.

He was completely taken aback by her emotional outbreak. "I…. I don't understand. Of course I understand you. Look, we don't have to talk about his right now if you don't want to."

He walked up to her and she went into his arms with a desperation that frightened her. She buried her face into his chest and searched for that oneness that she so desperately needed. "Hold me Joseph…please hold me. I'm so lost. Please…hold me." His arms went around her and held her closer. Her face went up to him and her lips sought his mouth. Her mouth met his hungrily and opened offering him her passion and when his lips failed to give her what she so desperately wanted she pushed him away from her.

"What the hell is wrong now?" He tried reaching for her and she began crying all the harder. "What's going on Gabriella?"

"Leave me alone Joseph, please. Just leave me alone." She begged as she turned her back to him.

"We can't go on like this." He threatened. "You come on to me then you push me away. We hardly ever have sex anymore. I still want you, Gabriella" he said uncharacteristically.

"I'm sorry," she said softly.

"I'll go pick up the children at your mother's. Shall I pick up some dinner?" The conversation turned as it always did into the normalcy of denial.

She nodded quietly.

He walked out of the studio and left her holding herself. Suddenly all her desire and shame became pain and she doubled over and fell to the floor.

"Blayne…. Blayne…." She cried.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Blayne sat back and let her head fall back on the seat. The flight to London would give her the distance that she desperately sought. Her eyes closed and as they did she held back a word that she longed to say.

She sat up and looked out the window and saw the distance growing and suddenly she could no longer stop from whispering the one word that her heart could not stop saying over and over again. "Gabriella." She said it softly, reverently and she allowed her self to savor it.

She turned on the music in her headphones trying to change her thoughts but was caught prisoner by the melody playing and instead of turning it off she listened. The melody was old and sweet and she brazed herself for the words that she knew would touch her soul.

Yesterday by the Beatles

Yesterday… all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they are here to stay, Oh, I believe in yesterday.

Suddenly…. I'm not half the man I used to be. There is a shadow hanging over me. Oh yesterday came suddenly.

Why she had to go I don't know, she wouldn't say. I said something wrong now I long for yesterday….

Yesterday…… love was such an easy game to play. Now I need a place to hideaway. Oh, I believe in yesterday.

Why she had to go I don't know she wouldn't say. I said something wrong, now I long for yesterday…..

Yesterday…… love was such an easy game to play Now I need a place to hideaway I believe in yesterday

"Gabriella…" her eyes filled with unshed tears, she didn't care who saw her and allowed them to fall down her face. She turned off the music. She closed her eyes and tried to find some peace in the darkness.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Elena pulled out an old box that had been put away years ago. She opened it and allowed herself to look inside. There were old photos and letters that had turned yellow with the passing of time wrapped in a pink ribbon. She opened a book of poetry by Jose Angel Buesa and gently touched the dried flowers folded within. Tears ran down her face as she remembered all the promises made and all the promises broken.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Mother, have you spoken to your attorney?" Chaz broke Abigail's concentration. She had been looking out happily at the garden. There were so many memories in the house. The children had grown up there…Arthur and she had spent most of their married life together there as well. She needed good memories these days. She needed to hang onto something beautiful in view of the sadness that filled her every time she remembered that Arthur would soon be gone.

"Why Chaz?" She turned to face her son.

"Don't you think that it would be wise…. I mean, father is not in a good state of mind right now. And who knows what he might decide to do."

Abigail stared at her son in disbelief. "Your father would not cheat you, Chaz. I dare say he will make provisions for Gabriella and her children but you will certainly be well taken care of. And besides darling, you have your own money that your father left you." Abigail tried to reassure him.

"How can you just allow this? I don't understand you mother. You just let his bastard stroll into this house!"

"Chaz! Your father is dying…please try and remember that," she said as her eyes filled with tears. She walked out of the room obviously distraught.

Chaz saw her leave and sat down in deep thought. Apparently he was the only one that this mattered to. He remembered how soft Gabriella felt when he took her in his arms. And who would have known what might have happened if Blayne hadn't stuck her nose where it didn't belong. She was always there before him, she was faster, smarter; she had all the things that he wanted, even Gabriella. Had they? Yes, Blayne had probably already been in Gabriella's bed. The thought of that infuriated him. She always got there first. But, this time he would be the winner no matter what it cost.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"You must be joking!" Blayne could not believe what she was hearing. "You can't honestly believe that I would agree to this."

"Blayne, I want to try and settle as much as possible. At least he is showing some intent," Arthur argued.

She shook her head in disbelief as she sat down behind her desk.

"Arthur…" she tried a different approach. "Where could I possibly put him so as to cause the least damage possible?"

"Blayne, I want him at the headquarters. Make him one of your VP's. Give him a real chance."

"No!"

Arthur decided not to challenge her at this time. He had been doing everything wrong lately where Blayne was concerned so he opted for caution.

"Why don't we talk about it when you get back," he said.

Blayne took a deep breath as she ran her fingers through her hair. "All right, all right."

"Diana tells me that she is meeting you over there." Arthur changed the subject.

"Yes, yes, we are going to try and spend some time together. At least that's the idea." Blayne laughed a little.

"Why do you laugh." Arthur asked curiously.

"The last time Diana and I tried this we ended up at the Zoo and you remember what happened then," she laughed.

Arthur laughed also. It had been so long since he had heard her laugh like that and at that moment he realized how much Blayne had changed throughout the years.

"Yes, I remember. Diana decided she wanted a closer look at the monkeys and you ended up in the pond." Arthur reminded her.

"She was my responsibility. I had to get her out of there." Blayne laughed at the memory. Diana had always been…. when had she lost that, she suddenly asked herself and the laughter died in her.

Arthur seemed to be keeping pace with her emotions because at that moment he realized that she had seen the loneliness that had gradually taken hold as well.

"Well, I promise no Zoo this time."

"Keep your sister out of trouble," Arthur said to her.

"With Diana there are no promises." She replied distantly.

"Blayne…."

"Yes father?"

"I have always been so proud of you." He said suddenly. "You have always surpassed my expectations. I…I wanted you to know that."

Blayne felt the knot in her throat and tried to control the emotion from overwhelming her.

"I love you Blayne." He could not control the emotion in his voice.

"I …I love you, father," she said softly.

"It's great sailing weather today," he said and as he did his hand went out to her over the miles of ocean that separated them. "When you get back we'll go out to the point. You loved going out there when you were a kid."

She could see the smile on his face without seeing him and she smiled too. "Well, hard not to when you told me all those tales of Sirens and Ulysses."

"Yes." He laughed. "When you get back then."

"Yes, when I get back."

Arthur hung up and smiled to himself again. Blayne had been such a beautiful child when he had married Abigail. She was bright and vital. He remembered all the times they had gone out on the sailboat. It had become gradually something that only they two shared, along with a love of history and his fascination with mythology. She had been a loving child, curious and a dreamer then. It had been so easy to love her. Slowly he had shaped her to one-day take his place.

Arthur looked out into the ocean from his balcony and wished he had perhaps taught her other things as well. He was proud of her. He couldn't have been prouder if he had fathered her himself.

Suddenly he realized he should never have contacted Gabriella. Arthur finally saw the selfishness in that act. What had he expected? He only wanted to appease his conscious where Elena and Gabriella were concerned. He had not only hurt them, he realized, but he had mortally wounded Blayne. In this admission he recognized his arrogance. He had yet again only thought of himself like he had done so many years ago.

He didn't understand Blayne's desire but he saw the pain in her clearly. Blayne had been able to hide things from the world but he had always been able to read her eyes. She was his child. Blayne was the real child of his heart and he had in his thoughtlessness destroyed her. At that moment Arthur's eyes filled with tears. He had been the one to yet again break the heart of someone he loved. Even now he realized she was putting distance between herself and Gabriella. What had he done? And yet he knew that he had to make her understand that it was for the best.

He would do one thing for Blayne before his time was up; at least he would try to teach her a way of attaining some peace. The ocean had been his confessor and in it he had found some solace. In its vastness he had found some sense of oneness. When Blayne got back he would give her that. If nothing else he would try to give her that.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

It had been an incredibly harried morning. Chaz had been working as one of her VP's for the past two months but Blayne was glad to admit that no major disasters had come of it. Arthur was going through Chemotherapy and seemed to be handling better than expected. Her mother was fooling herself that he would get better and they all let her, knowing that it was her way of dealing with the inevitable.

Blayne was so busy that there was no time left for her to give in to the bare facts of her present and the coldness to come of her future. Blayne was clearly a very competent machine when she was focused. Her analytical mind took all in like a sponge and the results were all logical and mathematical equations; emotions just had no place in her life. She worked best when she felt nothing, and lately she seemed to do no wrong.

Diana waltz into her office as she looked up irately at the interruption. Blayne was on an overseas call and motioned for Diana to sit.

Diana looked around the office and waited politely.

Forty minutes later Blayne finally finished her call and turned towards her sister.

"Did we have an appointment?" Blayne asked curtly.

"Do I need one?" Diana said defensively.

Blayne was about to say something then seemed to think better of it.

"All right. Diana, I'm sorry…I just meant…"

"You meant how dare I interrupt you." Diana was clearly upset.

Blayne was about to argue then just smiled.

"Yes," her smile broadened. "I'm sorry. You're right. I was rude. Is there something I can help you with?"

Diana smiled at her sister indulgently. "That's better. No, I don't need anything. I just came to say hello and hopefully take you to lunch…"

The telephone interrupted them.

"I'm waiting for a call…give me a moment okay?"

Diana nodded.

"Blayne Anberville."

"Blayne…"

Blayne froze. She seemed to stop breathing.

"I…I'm here in Boston. I need to see you." Gabriella's voice seemed to infiltrate every fiber of her body. Her eyes closed trying to shut down the reaction.

"Nooo…" was all that came out of her mouth.

Diana noticed Blayne's demeanor immediately.

"I'm staying at the Copley Hotel…I'll be here only till morning. Blayne…come, please." Gabriella begged her softly.

"Nooo…"Blayne opened her eyes and as soon as her eyes focused and suddenly became aware of Diana her body straightened. "I'm sorry that's not possible, goodbye," She said brusquely and hung up.

"You okay?" Diana searched her face. Blayne had gotten very pale.

"Yes…" Blayne looked down at her paperwork. "I'm sorry Diana…but I won't be able to have lunch I'm swamped." She looked up more in control of herself now.

"You look off keel. Sure you're okay?"

"Diana, I'm fine. Just really busy." She started shuffling papers around. "Maybe we can have lunch tomorrow if you're in town."

Diana smiled. "Actually that's even better. Lunch tomorrow then at one okay?"

"Yes, perfect. Where?" Blayne opened her appointment book to add it to her schedule.

"How about Sadrine's Bistro at one?"

"Great, I'll meet you there at one in the afternoon." Blayne made the note on her agenda and mist the totally devilish look that covered Diana's face..

Diana then got up happily. "Great! Well, I better let you get back to it."

Blayne smiled at her sister and nodded. That smile disappeared as the door closed behind Diana.

Gabriella is here… her head fell back on the chair. God please… Blayne closed her eyes in supplication.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

That night Blayne found herself walking down a carpeted corridor. She stopped in front of a door and stared at the floor for a moment. Closing her eyes, she breathed in then looked up telling herself yet again that she was not going to give in to this…then she saw her hand go up and knock. Something inside her tore as she felt the pain of defeat and exaltation.

The door burst open and neither woman knew who had taken the first step towards the other. The connection of the senses overwhelmed and both inwardly breathed in a feeling of oneness that had escaped them for so long. Neither one wanted that moment to end. No words were spoken as mouths met desperately. Blayne moved forward and pushed the door closed behind her.

"Blayne…Blayne." Gabriella said over and over again as Blayne's mouth traveled down her neck.

Blayne suddenly pushed her away from her at arm length. She searched Gabriella's face. She wanted to remember every nuance of the woman that had haunted her every minute of every day and every long night. She wanted to burn that image forever in her mind and soul. Her hand then reached out slowly and touched Gabriella's face lightly.

A tear escaped Gabriella's eyes at the pain she saw in the set of eyes in front of her.

"I'm real…. I'm here and I love you. Please…please let me love you." Gabriella begged her softly as tears ran down her face. "Tell me you still want me, please..."

Blayne closed her eyes and a whimper escaped her as her mouth kissed Gabriella's lips. "Want you?" Blayne's pain was audible in every word as she spoke with her mouth touching Gabriella's lips. "I have never stopped wanting you…. Gabriella, I'm dying for you." Her mouth then covered Gabriella's hungrily.

Words were not necessary…. touches and caresses said it more profoundly than words could have. Their lovemaking was passionate one moment and slow and unrushed the next. It was a joining of something deeper. The union had become more than that of flesh but of minds and souls. Their need was so palatable that there seemed no limit to the depth of the emotions and responses sought and exacted of one another. The need to feel one another was paramount to anything that might have or should have been said before. At the zenith of there love making both screamed out and climbed even higher together. Never for one instance did either woman not touch the other.

Close to the dawn of a new day they held one another covered under pristinely white sheets. Their breathing was steady, both knowing that the dawn would bring in the stark and cruel light of day. The night had cradled them protectively while the light of would probably bring with it the ugliness of a truth neither wanted to face. Both clung to one another saying nothing, refusing to brake the magic that held and bound them to each other.

Gabriella closed her eyes and held Blayne tighter to her. Blayne was what she needed, what she wanted and what could never be.

Blayne stared up at the ceiling as her arms pulled her lover closer to her she leaned down and kissed Gabriella's head as tears escaped her eyes. Tonight Gabriella was hers again, Blayne told herself, and tomorrow was a world away. If she were honest with herself she would admit that she had known from the moment of the phone call that she would come. Blayne knew that the morning would bring recriminations and words that would hurt and cause pain. Both would seek and absolution in accusations and inevitably they would tear each other apart.

But at the moment nothing mattered. Right here, right now nothing mattered to either of them. The only thing that was important was that moment, those hours…those precious stolen hours. For those few hours they had known what the joy of oneness was again. If only for a few hours they had both been happy.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Continued in Part Three

You've read it. Now take the time to tell Anne what
you thought. Sanneol7@aol.com


Till There Was You©copyright May 2002
Property of S. Anne Gardner



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