After All This Time
By Bella Taggart
Part 16
Callie arrived home around 10.00 o'clock. Despite knowing that Erica wouldn't be coming after so long, she hadn't been able to get herself to leave the restaurant earlier. As if to suit her mood, it had started raining. She took off her dress, turned on the shower and got in. She let the water wash away her tears and stood under the hot spray until her skin wrinkled.
She pulled on a pair of grey socks and a long t-shirt to sleep in. It had holes in it, it was so old and worn, but it was comfortable and Callie needed all the comfort she could get for the night.
For a while she contemplated calling some one. Getting together with a friend, having a few drinks and bitching about Erica was an idea, but one that was quickly put away. It was too soon. She wasn't angry yet-though that would come later she knew- she was just sad. Tonight was the night for self-pity. She would let herself have this one night and tomorrow she would get angry. And then she would go out and screw her brains out.
She sighed, feeling tired and drained. So that notion didn't hold her interest as much as it once did. Fine, she wouldn't pick up a stranger then. There were lots of people interested in her, lots of people who would love to be in a relationship with her.
Jane was the first name that popped into her head. Even though she had practically closed that door, she was pretty sure that she could get it opened again. Jane was nice. Jane was good in bed. Jane showed up when she said she would.
So what if it was settling. Lots of people settled for less than their dreams. And they lived, if not happily, then contently ever after. Maybe content was enough. Maybe happily ever afters were only reserved for fairytales.
She upped the speed of the blow-dryer and threw her head down, letting the hot air reach the back of her neck. A shake of her head had her hair moving from side to side, the movement mirroring her thoughts. No, she couldn't do that. It wouldn't be fair to her. If she knew that Callie was just settling for her, she wouldn't want her. Jane deserved better and somewhere in the back of her mind Callie knew that so did she.
She was pretty much screwed then. She squeezed her eyes, fighting the tears that were filling again. She couldn't be with Erica but she couldn't be with anyone other than Erica either.
Perfect.
Hair dry, drier put away, she sat on her bed and waited. Restless, she stayed there for a long time, just thinking. A look to her right revealed her phone staring back at her from her bedside table.
She felt her stomach tense, her breath catch. She couldn't, no, she wouldn't. She absolutely wouldn't. But then again, what did she have to lose at this point?
She picked up the phone and dialed Erica's cell phone.
Straight to voicemail.
"Argghh." She growled into the phone and hung up. Now Erica would know that she had called her more than once. Could she be a bigger loser?
Frustrated, she switched her phone off and threw it across the room. It bounced on the couch, flipped once in the air and landed on the very edge of the leather cushion. She wouldn't pick it up again. A hit to the switch by her side left the room dark. She slumped back on the bed, punched her pillow in an effort to get comfortable, and turned onto her side. "Stupid." She mumbled and closed her eyes.
She couldn't have been asleep for more than two minutes when she was pulled to the surface by the shrill ring of her doorbell. She jumped up in alarm, blinking a number of times, trying to get her bearings. She stood unmoving, shocked into stillness. The bell rang again. Her heart in her mouth she was startled into movement. She pulled on her bathrobe and reaching down, picked up her baseball bat from under the bed. Better safe than sorry, she thought, gripping the handle tightly as she rushed into the living room. A glance at the clock on the wall let her know that it was almost midnight. She cleared her throat, and trying her best to sound intimidating barked out, "Who is it?"
"It's me,"
Unbelievable.
"It's me...Erica."
Callie lowered the bat, took in a long breath in an effort to calm herself.
"Callie?"
Running a hand through her hair Callie finally opened the door.
She didn't know what to say, so she didn't say anything. She couldn't even meet Erica's eyes, so she just stood there, looking at the floor, waiting to hear whatever it was Erica had come to say.
"I am so sorry." Erica croaked, taking a step forward.
The shake of her voice more than the words, had Callie looking up. She gasped at what she saw.
Erica was standing in front of her, soaked from head to toe. Her hair-orange mad hair- was plastered all over her face, dripping rainwater down her cheeks. Her makeup had run down her face, her mascara leaving dark tracks from her eyes to her chin. Her coat and the blue dress under it were completely sticking to her body, and one of her heels was twisted tightly within her white knuckled grip. She looked miserable and almost frozen.
"What happened to you?" Callie cried, her voice rising in concern.
"Can I...can I come in?" Erica shivered.
"Come in, come in." Callie grabbed a hold of Erica's arm and pulled her inside. "My God, you're freezing." She ran her hands up and down Erica's arms trying to warm her up.
"I'm ok, I'm ok now." Erica croaked, shaking.
"Take this off," Callie ordered, taking hold of her coat. The coat was very heavy, weighed down by the water that clung to the fabric. "What happened to you?"
"I, uhm," Erica looked up and noticing Callie's puffy eyes, reached up to touch her cheek with a frozen finger "Have you... been crying?"
"I was sleeping." Callie rubbed her eyebrow, hiding her eyes.
"I'm..." Erica sneezed, "Sorry."
"You're ice cold."
"I...I walked, my car and the rain, and it broke down and I..."
"Sshh. You'll tell me later. Come on, let's get you into the shower."
"I," Erica trembled, trying to continue but then she looked down at herself and nodded, "yeah, okay."
Callie led her into her bathroom and taking a new set of towels from the cupboard, gave them to Erica. "Here, there's shampoo and conditioner and a few bottles of shower gels over here." She motioned towards the metal shelves hanging on the wall of the shower, "everything's pretty much where it used to be."
"Thank you." Erica wheezed, bending down to take off her single shoe.
"I'll be right inside, if you need anything." Callie offered, backing out of the bathroom.
"Callie,"
"Yeah?"
"Can you unzip my back?"
Callie blinked once, "Huh?"
Erica turned around.
"Oh, right, of course."
She put one hand between Erica's neck and shoulder-feeling the goose bumps under her fingers- and pulled down the zipper all the way down to the small of Erica's back, with the other.
Erica caught the dress before it could completely fall off her. "Thank you."
"Sure," Callie croaked, slowly moving back. "I'll put some clothes for you on the bed."
Erica nodded gratefully. Callie smiled softly and closed the door.
She took a moment, shaking her head disbelievingly, resting her back against the door. And then, she went to work.
15 minutes later Erica walked, or rather (be it less than before) limped into the kitchen, wearing the sweatpants and the t-shirt Callie had left for her. She was even wearing the sweatshirt despite the warmth of the house. A head towel was securely wrapped around her hair, Callie- not for the first time- wondered about the orange locks that were peeking from it, though she opted to smile gently, instead of saying anything about it.
"Better?" She asked, holding out a mug.
Erica took it from her hand without questioning. "Much," she nodded, "I feel human again, thank you." She looked down at her cup and raised her eyebrows, "Soup?"
"I figured you hadn't eaten dinner. I can make you something else if you want."
"No, this is good, it's great, thank you."
Pouring herself a cup of coffee, she took Erica by the arm and helped her into the living room. "Come on, you'd better sit down."
"Yeah,"
They sat down onto the three-person couch, next to one another, both sipping their drinks in silence. Now that they were in each other's presence Callie found that she didn't know what to say. She had questions but she didn't know where to start. By the looks of it Erica didn't either, though after a while she was the first one to speak.
"Yang's not home, I take it."
"She moved out."
"Oh?"
"Yep." Callie nodded, "Living with Owen now."
"Owen?"
"Dr.Hunt."
"Oh, right." Erica nodded back.
They kept nodding for a while, and giving each other toothless smiles when they made eye contact.
"When?"
"Huh?"
"When did she move out?"
"Well, about 2 years ago, I think."
"A while then."
"Yes."
Callie took a sip of her coffee, feeling the liquid warm its way down her throat. She watched Erica as she looked across the room, taking in the pictures spattered along the bookshelves. There were a few of Callie in various acts of sportsmanship; Skiing down a black slope in Val d'Isere, scuba diving with Sadie in the San Juan Islands-both looking into the camera under water giving the classic thumbs up pose. There was one of her in her cap and gown with her father and Maria, and one of her mother kissing her forehead when she was just a little girl. And a few others too, of Christina and Mark. One especially nice group photo that was taken in Mark and Lexie's wedding, all of them glowing in their tuxedos and dresses. Callie smiled, remembering that night. It had been one hell of a party.
"Do you like it?"
Callie looked back at Erica, "What?"
"Living alone."
Amused by the line of conversation, Callie shrugged and tipped her head. "Sure, it's okay."
Erica smiled, as though realizing the absurdity of her question and distractedly bent down to rub her ankle.
"You want me to take a look at that?" Callie asked, noticing the grimace that passed over Erica's face.
Erica looked up and hesitated for a moment.
"Let me see." Callie ordered, patting her lap. "This is what I do you know," Callie teased.
"Okay," Erica smiled tentatively, lifting up her leg "Doctor."
Callie gently inspected the foot on her lap, peeling off the sock and touching the slightly swollen ankle. When her fingers touched bare skin, Erica sucked in a breath in reflex. When Callie looked up, Erica simply muttered, "Cold."
"Sorry," Callie lowered her mouth to her hands and in turn to the foot within them and gently blew warm breath onto them. "Better?"
Erica opened her mouth to say something than closed it, swallowed and nodded silently.
"How did you manage this?" Callie asked, hiding her grin.
"I think I strained it, my car broke down and I was walking here and my stupid shoe broke a few miles back..."
"A few miles?" Callie asked incredulously.
"Yeah," Erica shrugged, shaking her head in a 'don't even ask' kind of way. Something about the way she pursed her lips made Callie think that the heel had been the least of her problems.
"I must have stepped on it wrong, I..." she trailed off wincing when Callie prodded a particularly sensitive part.
"Sorry,"
Erica shook her head dismissively. "You must be wondering what happened tonight."
"Well, yeah." Callie tried to keep her voice neutral, "I wouldn't mind hearing about it."
"Okay. Let's see...I left the hospital at 7 as planned, and then...this nurse had told me about this hairdresser that was supposed to be incredible and I had brought my clothes with me to work, I was already dressed, so I thought 'I have a little time, why not?' you know, I wanted to look nice for you."
Callie smiled at that, Erica smiled shyly as well and continued, "Anyway, I got there and this idiot washed my hair and I should have known something was wrong right then cause it burned while he was washing it but hey, he said it was a special product and that my hair was going to glow and be softer than ever and whatever. Blah blah blah, my hair came out green Callie. Like, seaweed green."
"Ouch."
"Yeah, well that was just the beginning. And then he did this conditioner thing that was supposed to counter the effects of the first thing and it just... it didn't work, it just came out worse, as you can see. And then there was this 70 year old man who was having his hair cut who basically collapsed and I had to do CPR."
"Are you serious?"
"Yeah, heart attack. Can you believe it? And then the ambulance didn't get there for 45 minutes because of the rain. And when it did I had to send him to Mercy cause it was closer. By this time it was already 10 and I got into my car and started driving back, but of course this day being today, my car broke down half way through. So I basically left my car on the side of the road and walked here."
"Wow."
"Yeah. Long story short, that's what happened."
"When it rains..."
"Literally."
"Couldn't you find a cab?"
"No cab, no bus. Nothing. And nobody stopped in the rain, it was just ridiculous."
"Why didn't you call a cab from your cell?"
"Didn't I tell you? My battery was dead. That's why I left you the message on your home line, for some reason it was the only number I could remember."
"What message?"
Erica's self berating smile dropped off her face. "You're kidding, right?"
Callie slowly shook her head. "I didn't get a message."
"But I left one. Not even one, two."
" I can't believe this." Callie got up from her seat and walked across the living room, to the answering machine hiding under piles of magazine and papers on the counter. "I haven't used this thing in ages, nobody calls me from my home. I didn't even think to check it." Moving aside the junk, revealed the blinking machine. Feeling like a total shmuck, she looked back at an expectantly watching Erica and nodded. "I'm such an idiot."
She pressed a button and the electronic voice announced, "You have two new messages. Message 1. Friday 7.25 p.m" Then came Erica's voice, " Hi Callie, this is Erica. I'm just calling you to let you know that I'm gonna be running a little late, let's say about a half an hour, just to be safe. Sorry about this and uhm, see you soon."
"That one I left, when I thought I was still going to be able to make dinner." Erica said, looking amusedly at Callie. As the machine announced the second message, she added "this one I left when I realized I couldn't."
"Hey Callie, its me again, I cant talk now but I cant make it tonight. I'll tell you all about it when I see you. Don't worry, everything is fine. I'll call you as soon as I can, or I'll come over. I don't know, anyway don't go to the restaurant. I'm really sorry about this, I'll make it up to you."
Callie sheepishly looked at Erica, "Oops."
"You went to the restaurant." It was more a statement than a question.
Callie nodded, "I did."
"Oh, no."
"It's okay."
"How long did you wait?"
"Not long..."
Erica looked skeptical, "How long is not long?"
"I don't know, just an hour...or two."
"Oh God." Erica frowned.
"No, its okay." Callie sat back down next to her, "I assumed that something had come up, I knew that you weren't standing me up."
"I wasn't. I... I'm so sorry. I wanted to be there, I wanted this date to be perfect..."
"Hey, these things happen."
"But they weren't supposed to." Erica shifted uncomfortably, shaking her head. "I mean, shouldn't it be easier? Maybe the universe is trying to tell us something. Maybe it's a sign that we're not supposed to be together. I mean, I don't know."
Something about the way Erica spoke made Callie think that she wasn't just speaking about tonight. Callie felt herself tense at the notion. Her stomach dropped and she swallowed before asking, "Do you really believe that?"
Erica looked at her for a long moment, her expression not giving anything away. After what seemed like forever, her eyes softened and she finally whispered, "No, I don't."
Callie blew out the breath she had been holding, "I don't either."
They shared a tentative smile as Callie reached over and gently took Erica's hand in hers.
"Maybe it means that, we are willing to do anything. Despite the difficulties, despite missed dates and misunderstandings, that we still want to give us a chance after all this time means that we are meant to be together. Maybe that's what it means."
Erica's eyes were filling with emotion. She squeezed Callie's hand, "Maybe."
Callie interlaced their fingers, "Come to bed with me Erica."
Erica swallowed nervously, "You- uhm, you think that's a good idea?"
"To sleep," Callie jumped in, feeling her cheeks burn. "No funny business. I mean, not that I don't want to, I want to, I really want to, but you're exhausted and in all honesty, so am I and I'd just like to hold you and sleep."
Erica looked at Callie for a long moment, her lips curled up, her eyes smiling.
"What?" Callie asked, after a moment.
"You're cute."
Callie chuckled, "Is that a yes?"
"That's a yes."
They walked into the bedroom hand in hand.
Callie pulled back the covers and taking off her sweatpants slipped into bed in her sleep shirt. Erica sat down next to her.
"Still cold?" Callie asked.
Erica nodded, "hmm, though the sweatshirt might be a bit much."
"Here," Callie sat up, taking hold of the bottom of the sweatshirt, "Arms up."
Erica chuckled and let Callie help her remove the clothing. "Thanks."
"I live to serve."
When she lied back this time Erica lied back with her. Instinctively they both turned to their sides -Callie spooning Erica- and settled into each other as though they had been sleeping together for decades.
Callie's arm wrapped securely around Erica's waist and Erica's hand came to rest on top of Callie's.
After lying there in silence for a while Callie heard a sniffle come from Erica.
"You want some advil?" Callie asked, moving to rise but Erica held onto her and shook her head.
"You really should take something, if your nose is running already Erica," Callie automatically went into doctor mode. There was no point in trying to look invincible. Erica had walked under the rain for close to two hours after all. If it had been Callie, she would have already taken two doses by now.
"I'm okay."
"You're not okay, you're sniffling." She brought her fingers to Erica's face, "Do you have a fever?" Her fingers came away wet. She felt herself tense as she realized that her sniffling wasn't of the flu. She lifted herself up onto her elbow,
"Hey, are you crying?"
"No."
"You are. What? What is it?"
"It's nothing."
"Tell me," Callie begged softly.
Erica shook her head in Callie's embrace, trying to hide her tears.
Callie felt dread fill her heart, "Is it me? Is it this?"
"No!" Erica sharply turned back to look into Callie's eyes. "No, you're great. This is great."
"What then?"
Erica shrugged, wiping her cheeks.
"Tell me," Callie kissed Erica's neck, "please."
After a long moment of silence Erica finally gave in and muttered, "My hair."
"Huh?"
"I know I should be above it and all but..." she sniffled, "I look like carrot top."
Callie trying to hold back her laughter, pressed her lips to Erica's shoulder. "No, no you don't." She said, reassuringly.
"I do. Look at this, it's orange, and look at the roots, the roots are green."
"You're beautiful."
"Ha." Erica chuckled,, "Yes, gorgeous."
"Look at me," Callie touched her chin, making Erica raise her eyes to meet her own. She cupped Erica's face and wiped away the last of her tears. And then she let her eyes travel from Erica's big blue eyes -more defined now after shedding tears- to her strong-be it red- nose, to her rosy cheeks, to the dimples, to the full lips that were slightly open and felt herself melt by the truth of her words. She breathed, "You are beautiful."
Looking up to meet dilated, wanting eyes were her undoing. No longer able to deny her need, she lowered her self to taste the lips she had been longing to claim.
The kiss was slow and tender, their lips rediscovering each other, re-connecting without the struggle of dominance or the rush of leading somewhere more urgent. Though Callie's heart was pounding all the same.
It might have ended that way, all innocent and gentle, but then Erica's hand reached up to run through Callie's hair, and her fingers took a hold of Callie's head pulling her closer and her lips opened to welcome Callie's tongue into her mouth and suddenly they were very much so lost in a place where everything was urgent.
A moan escaped Callie as Erica rolled onto her back and their breasts rubbed against each other. Leaning over Erica, tasting her neck, licking and sucking, listening to the sounds Erica was making, the moans and groans as Callie ran her hands along her body, along her chest to finally cup her left breast, the feeling of touching and kneading and teasing the nipple that was straining against the cotton of Erica's t-shirt was enough to have Callie throbbing.
Erica was clinging onto Callie with all her might, her hands running along her back, pulling Callie closer and closer. Her legs opened on their own and in her haste to get closer to her, Callie filled the gap with one of her thighs. She hissed as Erica's thigh settled against her, and hers settled against Erica in return, putting her weight now almost completely on Erica. Feeling every curve and contour of her body rise beneath hers, was driving Callie so far to the edge that she didn't think she could return from it without falling off.
And yet, she made herself stop for a moment, before completely losing control, stilling the gentle rocking that had just begun between them. Erica made a sound of protest, but Callie needed more confirmation than that. Trying to catch her breath, she looked up, "Are you tired?"
Erica looked at her uncomprehendingly for a moment. "What?"
"Cause I'm losing my mind here and if you're tired we don't have to do this, but you have to tell me now cause if we go any further I don't think I can stop till I have you."
"My God Callie," Erica panted, "Come here."
Rising up to re-claim Callie's lips she took a hold of Callie's nightshirt and in one swift motion pulled it off her. "I want you. I want you to have me." She breathed against skin.
"Oh, thank God."
Callie groaned as Erica's teeth grazed along her neck. As Erica's hands came up to cup her now naked breasts. As Erica bent down to take a nipple into her mouth, as she sucked and nipped. Her eyes rolling back in her head, Callie could feel herself getting wetter and wetter by the second. She wanted to reach down and touch Erica's wetness, feel it on her fingers, taste it on her tongue.
But there were too many clothes still covering Erica.
She couldn't strip her quickly enough. Even as she was pushing the t-shirt up with one hand, helping Erica get it over her head, she was slipping her other through the waist band of the sweatpants, into the pool of heat within Erica's panties.
That first contact tore a moan from both of them. And many more afterwards when Erica fell back onto the bed in surrender, opening her now naked legs in invitation. As Callie settled herself firmly in between them, as she licked her way down Erica's body all the way down to her center. As she took her in her mouth and as she licked and licked, making Erica squirm and thrust, all the while her fingers reached deep within her, first one then two and finally stretching her wide with three. And later right before she went off, when Erica reached down and pulled Callie up to her, to fit their mounds together, as they rubbed and rubbed and pushed and pushed till there was no place left to go, until both were left gasping and grunting and screaming out obscenities like "Yesss" and "Fuck" and "God" into one another. Until they were both falling off the edge into oblivion together, safe in each other's arms.
Continued...