The conversation with Gwen haunted Keegan most of the afternoon. She couldn't come to grips as to why Gwen would hire a private investigator to check on her. Did Gwen think Keegan would try to make a profit off their relationship? Did Gwen turn into a person who no longer knew how to trust? When she knew Gwen, she trusted people, trusted Keegan with all of her secrets. Add on the information regarding using an escort service. Did she live so far in the closet she had to pay someone for intimacy? The Gwen she knew would never hide who she was. Were sponsors and endorsement deals so important to Gwen, she would deny who she was?
Keegan struggled to understand why someone would live their life based on others' opinions. She had gone through too much to ever hide who she was or who she loved. She had to give Gwen credit. She was very up front regarding her choices and let Kee know. The revelation about hiring a private investigator made Keegan's heart ache. No matter how desperate for money she might have been, selling private photographs to the tabloids would have never been an option. If an investigator did come to Detroit snooping around, why didn't Keegan know? It wasn't as if she would have known someone was investigating her. She was in the middle of treatment if her memory served her correctly. Her movements between the house and the hospital were not hard to track. Sarah took her to most of her appointments. There were a number of occasions where she was admitted to the hospital. Guessing the amount of money Gwen spent to keep her private life out of the papers, the investigator hadn't been worth a dime if they never informed Gwen of Keegan's illness.
Dropping her head, Keegan rubbed the tips of her fingers against her temples. She was tired of thinking of Gwen. Silently vowing to let the matter drop, Keegan opened a book of baby names. She looked through the lists, trying to determine the best name for a boy… Blake…. Ryan…. Stan. Bill was a William. Irish names ran through the family. Liam was another possibility. John was another good solid name. The small fire burning in the hearth warmed the den. She stopped reading and glanced towards the door when she thought she heard the door open and close. Looking at the clock, she knew Ash would be at home getting Andy ready for bed. The throw blanket wrapped around her lower body fell to the floor as she got to her feet. Not as swollen today, she shuffled her moccasin covered feet towards the front of the house. Just as she was about to turn the corner, a tall figure with curly hair the color of midnight stepped in front of her.
"Jesus Christ!" Keegan stepped back her hand over her racing heart. Standing in front of her dressed to the nines in an emerald colored jacket and skirt with a black silk blouse underneath was her youngest sister, Meghan. "What the hell Meghan? Are you trying to scare me to death?"
"Sorry, I didn't think you'd be home. I thought you were working." Meghan pulled the three-inch black leather heels from her feet. "God, I hate heels."
"Be thankful you are tall enough not to need to wear them all the time. What are you doing here? I didn't know you were coming home? Does Ash?"
"No, I wanted to surprise everyone and see you." Her blue eyes flashed down to the sweatshirt-covered belly. "You look normal."
"I am normal, you ass." Keegan hit her sister's arm. "What is going on Meg? Last week you were off somewhere." Keegan waved her hand in the arm. Trying to keep track of where Meghan was took a full time secretary.
"Let me change and I'll bring you up to speed on what is going on. I can stay here right?"
"Of course, but your old room is a nursery. Use Ash's." Keegan watched her twenty six-year-old sister take her over night bag and the wardrobe carrier up the stairs.
Opening the door to Ashley's old bedroom, Meg expected to see posters of the Backstreet Boys, Tom Cruise and Johnny Depp on the walls. Instead, Keegan had transformed the room into a suitable guestroom. There was no trace of Ashley's teenage angst remaining. Rose colored wallpaper decorated with a pattern of flowers and greenery covered the wall. A light gray carpet covered the floor where Meghan had spilled an entire bottle of red Gatorade to Sarah's horror. There were small touches of potpourri bowls on the dresser and side table, filling the room with the fresh scent of spring hyacinth. This room felt like more of a home than her tight fitting two-bedroom condo. This was her home.
Her interview with Highland Woods Country Club was nerve racking. Although she was employed by the same parent company, her name was well known in the Detroit area. The interview panel questioned her for hours regarding her game, her philosophy, her family, decisions she had made and the ever present why she did not attend Weston University like her famous sister. Her famous sister was the reason she did not attend Weston. Keegan was a legend at Weston. There was no way Meghan wanted to be compared to her sister. Accepting a scholarship from University of Maryland, she left some of Michigan's universities disappointed. She couldn't follow in Keegan and Ashley's footsteps and attend Weston. Besides, she needed to get away to find out who she really was.
Hanging up the wardrobe bag in the closet, Meghan unzipped it and pulled out the suit she would wear tomorrow for the second round with the club's board of directors. For once she just wished there was a female on the board of a country club, not the stuffy old senior citizens she had been dealing with for the past eight hours. A nice looking female wouldn't be bad either. Although Meghan appreciated her family and friend's attempts to find her a perfect match, she only had eyes for Danielle Martin. The strange turn of events at Christmas changed her relationship with her sister's business partner. A shared kiss under the mistletoe led to their current status of three months of avoidance. Danny stayed clear of her at any cost. She even bypassed a weekend skiing with the company because Meghan was going to be there. Meghan hoped a move home would prompt Danny to at least acknowledge the attraction. Her plan was to secure a new position in Michigan before spring, just as the golf season started. She should have told her family of her plans earlier, but she didn't want to disappoint them.
Smoothing wrinkles on the black brushed silk jacket and skirt, she wanted to make certain she didn't have to touch it up with an iron. The red blouse she brought to wear with it was a bit bold, but she wanted to be perceived as bold and making a statement. She wasn't going to let the club or its members rule her life. She would make no qualms about who she was. When Keegan announced she was pregnant, Meghan vividly remembered spitting the water she was sipping across her kitchen while she talked with her sister. The once gloomy cloud that had hung over Keegan's life was looking as if it was finally dissipating.
When Andy was born, Meghan knew living out of state she would miss most of his firsts. First rollovers, crawls, steps, birthdays, she didn't want to have that again. She wanted to establish a relationship with her sisters and their families. Of course, Jason held Ash away for a number of years and now, her sister was living on her own and running a thriving business with Danny. Jealousy plagued Meghan regarding Ashley's relationship with Danny. It was another reason she left Michigan. She liked Danny, yet there was always this feeling that Danny was pining after Ashley. If Danny and Ashley's friendship developed into a romantic relationship, Meghan knew she would be devastated. Danny Martin was instantly adopted into the Garry clan when Sarah and Bill learned her own family had disowned her once they discovered Danny was a lesbian. The tall redhead's acceptance into the Garry clan was almost as quick as Gwen Lerner's. Gwen if Meghan ever caught that no good SOB she'd give the blonde exactly what she deserved. She knew Keegan could find happiness if she would let the Olympian go and get on with her life.
Throwing on a pair of jeans and a soft cinnamon colored Henley she quickly brushed her teeth and ran a comb through her wavy raven locks. Growing her hair long, it hung at her shoulders. Pulling her hair back was the easiest solution on the golf course and it didn't blow into the eyes when putting. She fixed her hair in the mirror than went downstairs in search of her sister.
When a more relaxed Meghan appeared at the bottom of the stairs dressed in white socks, jeans, and comfy shirt, she looked more like her sister than the imposter with the suit on. Every time Keegan saw her sister, she was usually dressed in a polo shirt and shorts looking like she just stepped off the course.
"That's the Meg Garry I know." Keegan sent the sable hair sibling a teasing smile. "Although you look very nice, you looked very stuffy."
"Stuffy? Thanks. You look great. If I didn't know, I wouldn't guess you were expecting. Nothing but a little bulge. How are you feeling?"
"Me?" Keegan went to the living room couch and sat on it. "I'm feeling good." The living room was rarely used when her parents owned the home. When Keegan took it over, she wanted to make sure every square inch of the house felt comfortable. The room no longer looked like a picture in a magazine. It was bright and cheery. The heavy window treatments were replaced with white sheer material to let the sun shine in. A light blue covered the walls combined with the light oatmeal colored carpet. A soft cushioned multi colored couch and love seat placed in the center of the room created a social area that had never been there before. A large oak coffee table matched the windowpanes and the baseboards that ran through the room. Family photos and little knick-knacks lined the end table and the television stand. A stereo unit was housed under the TV with a speakers system hanging in strategic places through out the house.
"This room feels different. The whole house feels different. Not bad but not mom and dad's."
"Well, I wanted to make it my home. And yet, I still want a piece of the memories we had growing up here. I always remember those horrible couches mom got from grandma."
"With the plastic on them and none of us even sat on them. They smelled."
"My point, we never used this room. I want to use every room in the house. So what's going on? And why didn't you let us know you were coming?" Keegan sat facing her little sister, their positions mirrored each other, a foot tucked under a leg and leaning against the blues, greens, grays, and browns of the couch.
"I've been interviewing. I'm getting to the final stages with Highland Woods. I didn't want to get anyone too excited over the idea until I was farther in the process."
"Oh my god, you're moving home." Keegan reached out and touched Meghan's face with the palm of her hand. "That would be the best thing in the world."
"So you wouldn't mind a roommate for a while if this all pans out?"
"Never. As long as you wash your own clothes." Keegan admonished her sister for acts she tried to pull off as a teenager. "Oh Meg, I hope you do well. Do mom or dad know?"
"I didn't tell anyone. I got in last night and stayed at a friend's." Meghan cleared her throat. She remembered dreaming about spending the night in Danny's bed wrapped in her arms. Instead, she woke up alone in the freezing weather. She would have much rather been engulfed in the warmth of a beautiful woman. "Not the best weather, but hell I can get use to it again. Do you think you can handle me three hundred and sixty five days a year? "
"You'll look for your own place right? And you have to take a vacation sometime during the year." Keegan let her thoughts wander for a moment. When she looked at the mirroring blue eyes, she smiled. "Without a doubt. I've wanted you home for a long time. I'm finally glad to know you are trying to come back to us."
"Enough about me. What about you and this one here?" Meghan leaned over and placed a hand on Keegan's belly. The baby gave a small kick as its mother's space was invaded. "Territorial one, isn't she?"
"It's not a she for sure." Keegan smiled knowing her sister recalled the dream she had when she was under treatment. "Oh, wait a second." Keegan scrambled to her feet and went in search of her purse. "I had a sonogram done yesterday. Gwen and Tony went with me." Keegan handed the black and white photo to her sister. She had stopped by the post office and sent one to her parents earlier.
"Did you say Gwen?" The hair on the back of her neck stood on end as her eyes locked with her sisters. "Please …please tell me it's a different Gwen than the one in the paper?" Meghan saw the photo in a discarded newspaper at the club.
"Meg, you know that there is only one Gwen and blame it on Ashley and Danny they thought about setting up a reunion." The overwhelming feeling of Gwen being at her side was still hard to believe. Keegan craved the warmth of her hands and the reassurance of her strength. When Gwen leaned into her and kissed her on the forehead, Keegan felt as if she was the awe struck young woman again. The attraction for the blonde had not faded over the years of separation. Taking Gwen to the restaurant was a mistake, she should have taken her somewhere quiet and out of the way. Some place where they could talk and get to know each other again. Gwen remembering Momma Rosa's was a restaurant Keegan loved and brought her dessert. It was pretty obvious that Gwen was reaching out to patch their relationship.
Meghan got to her feet and went to the table where a number of unread papers sat. She knew Keegan's weakness for the blonde and didn't want her sister to fall into the web Gwen was weaving around her. Before the sickness, before the Olympics, Meghan loved her sisters girlfriend. She loved how they interacted, how they shared things, how they disagreed but found a common ground. She always wished one day she would be able to have a relationship like that. Then the walls came tumbling down when Keegan got sick and Gwen left her to go on to the glory of the Olympics and play her little games. This sick cover she had with Bob Finch just added to the lengths Gwen was willing to go to in order to have her cake and eat it too.
"Here! Metro cover." Meghan said flatly as she handed her sister Sunday's paper. Watching the reaction of Keegan's eyes, Meghan wanted her sister to realize Gwen and Bobby's relationship was a manipulation. A candid photo of a very private moment between them was published in the paper.
"I know she came to visit him. I also know about DC and you. Bob Finch was here last night and drank coffee." Meghan raised her eyebrow, wanting to give Ashley a good talking too. "We talked a little about them. Meghan, you don't know what I feel and I don't expect you to understand. I barely understand it myself. But she is in my heart, good bad and ugly. There will always be a part of me that will love her. Right now, we are just starting to talk." The scowling look she received from Meg made her repeat. "Talk Meg, that is all. You just don't understand what it's like to love someone with everything you have to give. I had that with Gwen at one time. Because we were stupid, we are separate. I don't want to lose any more time with the woman I considered my best friend and partner at one time." Keegan knew her sister was trying to protect her just as she had during her illness. "Don't hate her Meg. She means a lot to me and so do you."
"I don't want you hurt again Kee. After the Olympics, you were crushed. And not to say what she does is her choice, but she isn't an innocent woman being exposed to wilds of the world. She is a predator who picks out and uses women. She finds the weak ones, has her way and is gone without a scratch."
"Meghan, I don't know who she is now, but I know how I hurt her. I failed her. I turned her away when all she wanted to do was support me. I told her to go away. So if you think she isn't wounded, you're wrong. She is hurt. She's so worried about getting to close or hurt again." Keegan felt as if her energy was sapped out of her system. She wondered what Gwen was doing at this moment. Just coming back into her life just less than seventy two hours ago, Keegan knew if Gwen hurt her this time, she would never recover.
#
In the middle of the room was a huge mound of food set out as appetizers. Shrimp and other former ocean creatures were piled high on top of ice as a dazzling blue lights cascaded down each side of the display. An ice sculpture of an engine was glistening under the ballroom lights. The condensation dripped off the work and was routed away from the cream cheese filled pasty puffs and Italian cheeses. The displayed of gluttony inspiring finger foods was enough to cause the Motors' trainer to scold the younger players about their diet. Gwen knew the temptation of gourmet treats and the pain of working them off the next day. Everything from mini quiche to raspberry tarts were sitting upon raised silver platters on a maroon colored tablecloth would have them running three extra miles in the morning. She didn't need the extra calories and had better things to do in the morning than put in extra road work, especially in the snow. Members of the Detroit Motors surrounded the ballroom. The players were starved. After a grueling practice, they attended the mandatory meeting at the country club with the promise of meal. So far the Highland Woods Country Club only provided them with appetizers. Gwen sipped the Virgin Bloody Mary as her amber eyes searched the room. The spouses who were comfortable in their roles, sat idly in the massive stuffy chairs close to the roaring fire in the intimate sitting area. The girlfriends battled for their men by their enhanced features, implants and latest trendy hairstyles. Some plastic surgeon was reaping the benefits of their work. Closer to the men, but not quite as close as the insecure newly weds. The players talked loudly and boasted about their latest victories, glancing occasionally at their other half to ensure peace at the house when they retreated for the night. Gwen turned to catch Bobby's multimillion dollar smile of as he walked across the room with a couple at his side. The smaller reddish haired man was familiar, but Gwen couldn't place him. At his side was a heavyset woman with blonde-brownish curly hair hanging to mid should in length. The laugh she let cackle loose filled the air and sent Bobby and the other man blushing. Gwen immediately felt the smile form on her face. Their laugher was contagious as the group headed towards her.
"Dear God, I thought this was a dinner?" Brady said as he swiped a piece of shrimp off the monstrosity of a pile. "Looks like Bubba Gump Shrimp Company landed here." Popping the pink crustacean in his mouth, he wiped his hand on his pants before he extended it to Gwen.
"Brady! Where are your manners?" The woman pulled his hand away before the goalie actually touched Gwen. "You can take the Neanderthal out of hockey, but you can't feed him shrimp." The sharp-witted woman responded. "Sorry for my husband, he only gets out a few times a year. Dana Sullivan." She extended her hand. "That beast is Brady. He's not a bad guy, forgets his manners. Not like your guy over here."
"Hi! I found them in the bar." Bobby tucked his arm around Gwen's waist. "I didn't mean to leave you stranded that long."
"Just remember pay backs." Gwen said as she turned her attention to her woman at her side. "It's pleasure to finally meet you, both of you. Bobby talks about you all the time. It's good to put faces with names." The group made their way over to one of the eight top tables and staked their claim on seats.
"The food better be good and get here fast." Brady said as he took a sip of his drink. "Bob says you're here until Thursday morning. Any plans on another visit? This guy was getting awful homesick the last month or so. I really don't think it was for San Jose."
"You are right on that assumption." Bob touched his drink to his lips. "They could have told us what time the food is coming. Heck, we ran from practice to here just to eat."
"Men, all they think about is food and sex!" Dana waved her hand dismissing Bobby and Brady. "What about you Gwen are you staying in San Jose for awhile?"
"San Jose has always been my home. When I get back, I'm heading to southern California than I'm in Boston after that. Ending with trip to Atlanta some where around the beginning of May."
"Such a busy woman. My head is spinning already." The goalies wife sympathized with her. Her head was spinning but it wasn't from her schedule. The last few days had taken her through an emotional roller coaster. The peaks and valleys had her stomach turning, plus the additional pressure the Motors placed on her to appear at tonight's social gathering and yesterday's stunt with the Eisenmann child. She would never complain about the trip to the hospital. The Motors were using her presence to their advantage. If it got the teams name publicity, the Motors were happy. Gwen sighed. She loved the kids and it broke her heart to see them in the hospital. She wished she and Bobby could have gone to visit without all the media hype.
"Wait until you have kids." Dana continued her slew of questions to Gwen. "You do want kids don't you?"
"I haven't given it much thought until recently." She spoke the truth, knowing she was excited about Keegan having a baby. She recalled the feeling of elation she got on Monday morning standing next to her former girlfriend watching the monitor reflect the image of the baby growing in her womb. Later that afternoon, her interaction with the Eisenmann heir was making her question how a child could turn into a total bitch by age nine. There were just some people who should not multiply.
The kids in the hospital were wonderful. Each one of them battling some illness, they were excited by Bobby's presence. When Gwen read the younger children a story, she was fascinated by their reactions to The Diggiest Dog. The parents sat and listened, watching their children find some joy in the presence of the athletes. Gwen wondered how hard it would be to watch your child suffer through an illness. She pondered over what it had been like for Keegan to be in the hospital for treatment. The tomato juice in her hand was not going to be enough. She needed to let out some steam and not think about Keegan for a few hours. She turned and winked at Bobby. She wanted to dance at a club and have some fun. Maybe he would be up for it.
#
The bass line was pumping, filling the air with that heavy beat which made your chest cavity vibrate. The Triangle Club or the Angle as it was referred to by the patrons was an exclusive club for the upper echelon of the community. Doctors, lawyers, politicians, and pro athletes who did not want to go to the main stream gay clubs. Angle guaranteed its patrons that their identities would be concealed. Bouncers heavily monitored the doors and membership was by recommendation or referral only. A former college roommate who frequented the establishment while in Detroit on business referred Bobby. The doorman greeted the couple with a large smile as he opened the door. Gwen swore she heard the man groan as Bobby passed by. "You just made his night." Gwen smiled as she took in the nightclub.
Gwen pulled Bobby on the dance floor, a large area that had recessed lights in the floor. The dynamic light show turned from fast flashing strobes to blinding neon blues, reds and greens. When the black light was turned on, Bobby's teeth turned a bright white as did Gwen's ribbed tank top. For a Tuesday, there were a number of patrons on the dance floor and spread through out the bar and sitting areas. A section of tables cascaded between the bar and the dance floor. On the far side of the dance floor was a raised DJ booth with two people manning the controls.
They danced together to most of the fast songs, with a few breathers between sets. When they walked to the bar together, Gwen felt eyes on her. She knew someone was staring. She had had this feeling too many times before to be mistaken. She lifted her eyes to across the bar and saw the penetrating gaze of Dr. Carrie Micah staring at her. This was not good. Attached to the doctor's arm was the familiar figure of Sonja. Really not good. She tugged on Bobby's sleeve. When he leaned his ear closer to her mouth, she said. "We need to go." Bobby pulled back quickly as he wondered what had changed her mind so quickly. They had been there for close to two hours after the stuffy dinner at the country club and the montage of bullets Dana was sending them about children, houses, PTA and college entrance essays. He agreed with Gwen's need to blow off some steam and get out of the breeder world for awhile.
"Come on G…" He started to admonish her attitude and party pooper life style. "What's wrong?" His eyes landed on Sonja and the large bull doggish woman next to her. "Oh I see." He sensed her uncomfortable state as she spayed out her fingers on the bar.
"No you don't." She corrected him. Seeing Sonja didn't bother her. The woman was good at what she did and had an exclusive clientele. Having Keegan's pseudo girlfriend slash OBGYN throwing daggers her way from across the bar did. "The blonde is Keegan's doctor. The one she is dating or whatever." Gwen threw her hand up in a dismissive manner. Keegan had never said if she was seeing anyone or not. If she told Gwen it was none of her business one more time, Gwen was going to make it her business. Tired of the guessing game Keegan was putting her through.
"You're kidding." Bobby let his eyes gaze over the doctor. She wasn't harsh on the eyes, but there was an underlying storminess her body held. The rigid hold of her head, the hard look in her eyes, this woman's body language expressed anger. "I don't like her." His matter of fact tone brought Gwen's attention back to him.
"You don't know her." Gwen corrected.
"I don't need or want to." Bobby set his drink on the inside lip of the bar. "Let's go." Bobby placed a protective arm around Gwen's waist as they moved towards the club's exit. Just as they were about to hit the door, a clammy hand dropped down on Gwen's shoulder.
"Lerner, didn't think I'd see you here, at least not with Mr. Finch." Dr. Micah's hand slid over Gwen's shoulder to linger a little longer than necessary on her back. "I'm glad to see he is accepting of your choices."
"Carrie. I'd say it was nice to see you but it's not. Come on let's go." Gwen cringed from the feeling of the paw the doctor placed on her. As soon as they cleared the door, Gwen wrapped her arms around her body. The cold March air whipped through the heavy corduroy shirt she wore. She didn't want to bring a coat into the club. Bobby shivered as he opened the door of the BMW for her.
"That was interesting." Bobby said as he slid into the driver's seat.
"You don't even know the half of it. She's going to tell Keegan I was there and make up something so Keegan ends up hating me again..more." Pulling her coat from the back seat, she pulled it on trying to ward off the coldness.
"Gwen, you did nothing wrong. If Keegan doesn't see that, maybe she is not the person for you." He held up his hand to silence the argument that was about to spew from her. "Listen to me. You haven't seen her in years. When you finally do, you find out she was ill. So sick she almost died. I think you're feeling guilty about not being there for her. Guilty for getting on with your life."
"I don't…"
"Yes, you do. If she doesn't trust you, than I don't think this is a healthy relationship for you to be in."
"I'm just trying to be friends with her."
"Who are you trying to kid? Me or yourself?"
#
The smell of sweat mixed with deodorant and disinfectant soap hit Keegan's senses as soon as she walked into the exercise room. Her stomach turned and flopped as if she were on board a boat on the choppy waters. Being pregnant put her senses into hyper drive. If the smell was Momma Rosa's cooking versus the morning work out of the Daves, she might be able to keep from getting sick. Her yoga session on Wednesday mornings followed the work out of Dr. David Vincent and his lover, Dr. Dave Ford. She worked at Weston with Dr. Vincent while Dr. Ford ran his own private dental practice across town.
Wiping off his brow with a fluffy white towel around his neck was her friend and yoga guru, Jonathan Sparks, or Sparky, his nick name from the staff of O'Connor's Gym. Keegan took up mediation and the use of yoga during her illness. When her body was too weak to take on a vigorous workout, she found a substitute.
"Good Morning!" Jonathan waved to her as she walked across the matted floor. "My gosh you are glowing..beaming." He wrapped her up in a hug careful not to get any sweat on her. "You look almost a bright as the Daves when they walked in here this morning."
"Which one of them is pregnant?" She got a vision of Ford with a protruding belly.
"Neither, but Ford looked like he was about to have kittens. I guess they were at the Angle last night and ran into our newest hockey star." He stretched his arms over his head to loosen the joints. "With the wife in tow." Jonathan's smile brightened. "Gay men all over Detroit are rejoicing this morning. Can you imagine…" He stopped and looked at his client. "Sorry I'm as bad as Bingo night at the church hall." He didn't like to gossip but the thought of Bob Finch being gay fulfilled his every fantasy.
"No, I find this very interesting." Keegan rolled out her yoga mat as she sat on the bright orange colored padding. "Were they interacting with anyone?"
"From what Dave said." He sat down next to her on his own mat. "They stayed to themselves. Although they danced together. They didn't make a public display of affection." Placing his legs straight out, Jonathan bent at the waist as he touched his toes.
"Show off." Keegan muttered as she continued to stretch out her muscles. She could touch her toes still but choose not too. She started doing yoga when she couldn't do the over exerting exercise regiment she had been use too. "So maybe they went there to get out of the lime light. God knows the press and media have been swarming around them since she got here."
"America's Sweetheart…she is drop dead gorgeous. Even you have to admit that." He noticed the smile brighten her face. He had been her yoga instructor for a couple of years. Keegan never gave indication she found anyone attractive or even pursued an interest. Class after class, a woman would try to woo the Physical Therapist out on a date. Keegan turned them down with a smile and extended an invitation to be friends. They never really talked about her past or her relationships. He knew she had survived cancer, was close to her family and had a great work ethic. When she told him she was expecting, Jonathan wanted to have a baby shower at the gym for her. Instead, in Keegan fashion, she didn't want the attention and was more interested in private sessions so she would make certain the baby was not harmed. So every Wednesday morning after the Daves, he reserved an hour of time for her.
"She's hot." There was a slight blush creeping up her cheeks.
"Well it's about time you acknowledged some one was attractive." He smiled at her and positioned her shoulders into a straight line. Not that she was that far out of alignment, he wanted to make sure she wasn't slouching and her lung capacity was at its highest potential. "I was starting to worry about you. Vince said that the big dyke OBGYN was trying to hit on her." Jonathan chuckled. "She didn't have a chance Dave said. After they left Dr. Dyke just fumed and slammed a couple of shots."
"Dr. Micah?" Keegan felt the familiar flip of her stomach as if this kid was doing cartwheels. "That's interesting." She needed to relax and let go of all the outside interference. Let her stress disappear. If Carrie saw Gwen last night, odds were favorable that she would try to create some type of friction between them. "So they weren't with anyone else? Just like a couple dancing and having a night out?"
"That's what the Daves said." He shrugged his shoulders. "Okay, start with relaxing and watch your breathing. I can feel the tension oozing out of you." Jonathan let a long deep breath out as he encouraged Keegan to do the same. The tension in the air eased. As he let his limbs turn to jelly.
"Jon, whatcha doing tonight?" Keegan had that playful gleam in her eye. The look was rare but he had witnessed it before.
"Going to Rock's to watch the game. Why?" Rock's, the armpit of the gay bars in the area but it was close to his house and he didn't have the platform cable station carrying the game.
"Would you like to go to it instead?" Keegan watched his composer of Yoga instructor slip to that of a young child on Christmas morning.
"Are you kidding?" The game was sold out and the team was on a hot streak. Their win over Cleveland on Saturday was still running through his head.
"A friend of a friend knows someone at the Motors and offered me tickets for tonight. It's going to be the girls." The "girls" was reference to Danny and Ashley because they never seemed to doing anything without the other. "My sister, Meg is in town as a surprise and Tony. You remember him?"
"God yes I'll go. And Tony …hunky Tony with the long hair and."
"Ssssh.." Keegan scolded when he started to describe her best friend. "I'm mediating."
"Omm….omm" The chant filled the training center as the tension released from her body.
#
"Okay. Are you sure?" He paused a moment listening to the voice at the other end. "I'll tell her. Thanks." Bobby smiled as he flipped closed his cell phone. The smile on his face was priceless. "Guess who that was?"
"Your mother?"
"No, your girlfriend. She asked if it was okay to get six tickets for the game tonight. I don't what strings you pulled with Phil but I'm glad you're with me."
"Is she coming?"
"That my dear is all in your hands." He laughed as he turned the wheel towards the house he was scheduled to view.
Chapter 14
A sea of silver with splashes of navy and emerald floated from the parking lots, through the tunnels and into the sports complex. Public transportation brought thousands of excited fans to the home of the Motors hockey team. Packed like sardines, fans tried to create space, vying to find their seats. The image of Mikey Motor, mascot for the team was everywhere. The bright silver V-8 engine adorned sweatshirts and childrens' faces. Overzealous fans chanted for victory as they tromped through the massive corridors on their way towards center ice. Parents held tight to their children's hand, trying their best not to lose them in the masses while still trying to avoid the expensive souvenir shops and overpriced concessions stands. Who in their right mind would purchase a hot dog for $8.50? The prices the public paid to be at a sporting event. The world of professional sports carried a high price tag. Outside the gates, standing in the will call alcove, Keegan and Meghan waited. Keegan's teeth chattered like castanets every time the outside door opened. Since most of her clothes were tight, she resorted to borrowing a pair of jeans from Danny. They were a bit long, which had her wearing a pair of Timberland boots with a hardy heel. Under her winter jacket she had on a Motors' jersey with Brady Sullivan's number on it with a white turtleneck under it. Jonathan had given her the jersey as a gift for Christmas. She never thought she would actually wear it to a game. She shuffled her work shift with Maurice to give her a little more time between work and the game. Meg was at the house by the time she got home and was confident about her interview. Another gust of winter air was released through the concourse causing Meghan to groan.
"Damn. Is it always this cold in here?" Meghan complained dressed in a turtleneck, sweater, jeans and a heavy barn coat huddled in the corner where the outside air still reached her. "I'm going to have to get a new wardrobe."
"You'll get used to it again. It's in your blood." A big smile formed on her face as she thought of her youngest sister moving home. "There are the boys." Keegan commented as she waved franticly at Jonathan and Tony as the pair walked towards them. "Hey! Did you guys ride together?"
"I took the People Mover and saw this guy. I'm Jonathan." He extended his hand to Keegan's very cold looking companion. Eyeing the huddled figure, he decided that she definitively not a date. He chuckled at the defensive position of her arms or was she freezing? He could see the similarity between Keegan and the dark haired woman huddled in the corner. "The younger sibling?"
"Meg Garry." Meg extended her hand to Keegan's friend. He was very attractive. His chin was covered with goatee a little darker than the brown hair that covered his head, cut in a short attractive style that set off his bright blue eyes. In sharp contrast was the mongrel looking Tony with his John the Baptist look in full swing. Her sister really knew how to attract the men. Now she just needed to put that effort towards the women. "Nice to meet you." Meghan greeted the trainer. "Tony, I see Lent has hit your congregation. I'd really like to see you without all this hair." Meg pulled a lock that hug over his shoulder.
"I'm not a preacher and you should visit in the summer." He said as he wrapped her up and rubbed her face with his whiskers. "What kind of a job is a golf instructor any way?"
"One that pays the bills and gives me ungodly tan lines." She jabbed him in the ribs slightly until he loosened his hold. "Jealous?"
"Of course." He said as he scraped his stubble against the smooth grain of Meg's cheek again.
"Is that a ritual greeting you have or am I missing something?" Gwen asked, standing to the side behind the velvet ropes with a security guard at her side. Tony's head lifted as he hit Gwen with a laser of a smile. He felt Meghan tense as soon as she saw her sister's former girlfriend.
"Ease down tiger. She's important to your sister." Tony murmured in Meg's hair. Kissing her lightly, he let his arms drop and approached the soccer player. "I can give you one if you want?" Tony called to Gwen. He approached her with arms extended and pulled the blonde off her feet and into a bear hug rubbing his beard on her face. Gwen squirmed and laughed.
"Stop..stop it." Gwen called out as she playfully hit him before he set her back on her feet. She took in the party standing in the lobby area. The rangy looking man with the goatee stood close to Keegan. He was dressed impeccably, with a Motors T-shirt over an oxford and fashionable pair of jeans with a heavy leather belt. He looked a little like one of the guys from Queer Eye, the dark haired one who gave men grooming tips. Meghan's appearance was quite a surprise. Gwen didn't realize she would be in town visiting. "You guys ready?" Gwen felt the heavy stare of Meghan on her. When the dynamic duo of Ashley and Danny were escorted to the loge, they didn't mention Meg visiting. The business partners asked to come before the crowds so they could see some of the pre game warm up. Andy was being babysat by a neighbor.
"There's two more." Keegan searched the growing crowd for Ashley and Danny. She tried to avoid looking directly at Gwen, but couldn't help notice the outfit she was wearing. The woman knew how to dress, wearing a black dress jacket over a cranberry colored blouse that was open to reveal the same amount of cleavage as yesterday's outfit. Brush black slacks with a low waist and silver tipped black belt. Silver accents on her ears, her neckline, and wrist. Black leather boots with a full heel finished up her outfit. Keegan felt her heart begin to pound and her body temperature rise. Southern regions which had been dormant for a long period of time were raging. There had been an immediate attraction to the blonde when she joined the national team, even before she made the team. She needed to get her emotions under control. Gwen was a beautiful sexy woman, with a great body. No one would fault her for reacting to that. They were two different people with a history of a relationship. She needed to move forward, not backward. She would not open her life to Gwen so she could be hurt. Gwen would be gone in the morning and Keegan could go back to the way her life was.
"They're already here and in rare form." Gwen assured her as she took in the scowl on Meghan's face. The other man with the ultra bright smile was looked as if he would jump up and down like a Jack Russell. "If you've got the tickets, come on I'll take you up."
With tickets scanned, they were lead into the inner workings of the arena. Keegan had been to games before. This was the first time she had to take a private elevator and be escorted to a suite. She didn't tell Meghan Gwen extended the invitation. She didn't have the energy to argue with her sister. In fact, she hadn't wanted to deal with the situation, so she took the easy way out by calling Bobby instead of Gwen. Inviting Jonathan was a good choice. She knew he was a big hockey fan and would appreciate the invitation. The expression on his face when Gwen called out to Tony was priceless.
"I didn't know you knew Gwen Lerner." Jonathan whispered in her ear as they stepped into the elevator. "Wow…thanks."
"Just have fun Jonathan. I think this is going to be better than Rocks."
"I'm sure it is." The personal trainer's smile lit up his face. He was definitely going to have one up on the Daves. Now if he could meet Mr. Gwen Lerner his fantasies would come true.
Standing next to Tony, Gwen could feel her heart beating against her chest as it echoed in her ears. Her attraction to Keegan had always been there. She was yearning to be in her presence. When they met while on the National Team, Gwen fought the feelings she had towards the fiery player from Michigan. Her number one rule was never ever get involved with a teammate. So instead of acting on it, she fought against it, letting Keegan tease her mercifully with a string of women she dated. Tony gave her a comforting smile. She hadn't seen nor spoken to Keegan since the meeting in the chapel. Bundled up in a winter coat with a faux fur collar, Gwen thought she looked gorgeous. Her hair was pulled back in a long thick ponytail. Gwen wanted to feel the soft long locks with her fingers. A light coating of makeup gave her a classic look. Her blue eyes widened at the comment of the slim man standing next to her. Gwen spayed her fingers nervously, feeling Meghan's glaring blue eyes. She needed to clear the air with the youngest Garry, otherwise there was no moving forward. She wanted to put the past behind them but it seemed at every turn there was roadblock or a detour.
"I heard she bites, but I know her shots are current." Tony whispered in the soccer player's ear as the elevator door opened.
"Ha! Ha! Remind me to call you when I need backup."
"Oh no, you're on your own. I only take a small portion of responsibility for the actions of the eldest. Not the rest of them." As they passed through the doorway to the loge, Ashley came into sight. "My point made." Tony pointed to the awful outfit worn by Ashley. She was decked out in head to toe Motors gear, from the silver pompoms in her hands to the green and blue ribbons braided in her hair. Small silver engines hung from each ear. On one of her cheeks, she had Bobby's number 44 painted with silver glitter, the other was decorated with a green goalie mask. "Who let you out of the house?" Tony's voice boomed as the women stood at the top step of the seating area.
"Look what the cat drug in!" Danny said as she turned to the group entering the loge, her heart leaping into her throat as Meghan came in. Danny was usually prepared to see the youngest of the Garry clan. Tonight, she was totally caught off guard. Her chest pounded, she could feel the blood pouring into her loins. If she had known Meghan was coming, she would've canceled. After three months, she was still not ready to face her. Normally, she held her libido in check, but since Christmas, that wasn't the case. Keeping her feelings for Meghan in check had been a challenge for the past couple of years. The attraction to the raven haired woman hit her like a freight train the first time they met, yet the need to hold tight to the relationship with the Garry family outweighed any attraction. On her own since she was nineteen, Danny's strict Irish Catholic family disowned her. Since the Garrys took her in, she never wanted to be without the support of a loving family again
The last time she saw Meg was over the Christmas holiday and the kiss at Ashley's house. Because of a business dinner Ashley had with a client, she had asked Danny to drop Andy off for Meghan to watch until she got home, Andy, the innocent little boy, tore through the house and into Meghan's arms. Danny followed cautiously behind, dropping his book bag in the foyer. Andy mumbled something and Meg kissed him. Stepping close to Meg, Danny felt the heat rise in her cheeks as blue eyes danced over her face and down her body.
"Kiss! Kiss!" The cry was from the small boy jumping up and down at their feet, pointing at the archway above. Danny looked at the bouquet of mistletoe hanging above their heads. Her gray eyes must have widened as she heard Meg chuckle.
"It's a tradition." Meg's voice was a soft whisper.
"Kiss!" The scream of the toddler filled the air. Danny looked at the curly haired boy who smiled at her with a crooked smile. She lifted her face to Meghan's. Taking in the expressive blue eyes, Danny ran a finger under Meg's chin and tilted upward.
"It's a tradition." Closing her eyes, she lowered her lips to Meg's. Engulfed in the sweet softness of Meg's lips, she touched her hands to her waist and pulled her closer. Unsure of who sighed first, Danny felt Meg's mouth open under her caresses and their kiss deepened. She had dreamed of this moment many times. Meghan's arms wrapped around her neck and held on tight. At this moment, she didn't care about keeping her feeling inside. Carpe diem, she seized the moment and let Meghan know how much she wanted her. Later, she would regret her actions. This emotional connection with Meg had her heart pounding, her stomach tingling and her brain trying to memorize every moment. They conveyed their attraction not through words but through touches. Their bodies pressed closer. Meghan's fingers pulled lightly through Danny's hair. Danny listened to the message Meghan was sending her and it was very clear, the attraction was mutual. Teasing and touching continued as the women went back and forth with their caresses. Listening to the small voice in her head, Danny eased back as the kiss came to the end in the form of small lingering touches.
"Danny," Meghan's voice broke the silence. Danny pressed a finger to her lips preventing any words to be passed between them. Instead, Danny held tight savoring the feel of Meghan's body pressed tight against her. She let her eyes linger in the sea of blue staring back at her questioning. Danny knew she could not let this happen again. She wouldn't be able to survive losing her adoptive family. Danny let her hands fall away from Meg's and stepped away from the warmth that beckoned her heart.
"I'm sorry." Danny murmured as she fled the house leaving an astounded Meghan speechless. Now, ten feet from her, Danny watched as blazing blue eyes took in her figure from head to toe. Heat rose to her face as Danny cleared her throat and threw an unappreciative look Meghan's way.
"MEG!" Ashley's scream caused every canine within hearing distance of the arena to howl. "Oh my God!" The sibling engulfed her sister with tears welling in her eyes. "When did you get in? Why didn't you tell me?" Ashley pulled her younger sister into her arms and squeezed.
"It's called a surprise. You should've seen Keegan last night. I scared her to death!" The words were cut off immediately as both siblings turned to look at their older sister. The room became deathly silent.
"Better!! Remember, no more cancer." Keegan filled the awkward air. She shrugged out of her jacket with some help from Jonathan. "I didn't want to be a buzz kill." Keegan mumbled under her breath.
"It's hard for them. They almost lost you." Jonathan ran a soothing hand down her back for comfort. "I think you're healthier than both of them. But Meg's got a nice tan." His smile twinkled.
"Job requirement. Ask her to show you her tan lines." Turning to take in the loge, she smiled at the fully stocked refrigerator and bar. Spread across the counter was an array of food from chicken wings to a veggie platter. The focal point of the room was two large open picture windows where center ice could be viewed. In front of one of the windows were four stools at a bar overlooking the additional twelve seats cascaded between two rows outside the suite. They were in a private box with enough seats for sixteen people on the second level of the area. The zamboni machine circled the ice, smoothing the surface to a glassy finish. Fans filled majority of the seats as the teams began to make their way back to the benches. Television monitors hooked up to the internal cable system were tuned to the announcer's booth where the Motors play by play person, Huey Carmichael and Sean Mullins droned on and on about the first weekday sell out.
"This sure beats Rock's. How do you know Gwen?" Jonathan asked as he put her coat in the closet near the door.
"We played together awhile back. I'll introduce you." Keegan wished she had a mirror or could discreetly make her way to the bathroom. The winter weather did a number on her hair. Smoothing back the brown locks with one hand, she placed her arm through Jonathan's as she led him towards the couple engaged in a discussion. She checked on Tony, he was at Danny's side teasing the redhead about something in the crowd and she looked a bit frazzled.
"What's up with Danny? She looks like she just got caught with her hand in the cookie jar." Jonathan whispered to his client.
"Meghan, but it's a long story." Keegan commented as she searched for their hostess.
Gwen stood near the bar, speaking to the Motors' Public Relations representative. Phil's clean-shaven head reflected the recessed lights, causing a slight glare off his head. Like most of the Motors management, he was dressed in a crisp black suit and bright green shirt with a Motors button on the lapel. Her week dealing with the front office of the hockey team had been very trying, unscheduled events and press junkets were not what she had bargained for. Phil had just informed her of her payment for the loge, an interview during intermission after the first period.
"You understand our position on this Gwen?" The deep voice thundered in her head. Phil Novak and the Motors had pulled another fast one on her. This time at least it wasn't a spoiled child. Instead it was the adoring public of Detroit, all of Bobby's new fans. "You know you are quite a draw with the fans as well. Our latest demographic shows young women are developing an interest in the Motors and you have eighty-five percent name recognition in the Detroit area."
"That's not in the agreement Phil." Gwen ran her hand through her hair. She hadn't planned on appearing on the air tonight. She wanted a quiet night at the game with her friends. At least in San Jose they treated her with respect. The Motors seemed to be exploiting her. Just as the thought entered her head, the announcing team came on screen.
"We understand that Gwen Lerner is joining our group at the intermission. I can't wait for that interview. Our camera operators have been searching the arena trying to sneak a shot in of the Olympic soccer player. There are even a few signs in the rink proposing marriage to her."
Gwen shot the sweating man a burning look that made him understand that she was not happy about the way this was being handled. The television picture flashed to an adorable little boy holding a sign saying "Gwen marry ME!" As Phil took out his handkerchief to dab the moister off his brow, he mumbled an off the cuff apology to her.
Gwen's uncomplimentary reply was interrupted by Keegan and Jonathan's presence. Instead, Gwen flashed a cordial smile and softened her words. "You need to speak to my agent." She turned her attention to Keegan and her friend.
"Oh, I'm sorry." Keegan said as she sensed the tension between the pair. The black man flashed a big toothy smile. "I just wanted to thank you for the invitation and introduce Jonathan Sparks."
"Phil Novak, Motors Public Relations Manager." The charismatic man interrupted the conversation by extending his hand to Keegan and then to Jonathan. "We are happy to have any associates of Bob's. We are expecting big things out of him this season. It would be best if his friends and family are close to support him." The man's gaze lingered a little longer than necessary on Keegan's face. "Do I know you?"
"No, I think I would remember." Keegan shuffled her feet. "Keegan Garry."
"You're the appendix player from the Greece games. Every reporter in the world was trying to get an interview with you. I got call after call from contacts trying to get a statement from you. You, my dear were not very co-operative."
"Never have been." Keegan responded automatically. She had dodged call after call from every reporter and sports representative.
"Nice to finally put a name to a face. I forgot that you were teammates for a couple of years. Good to see you have friends in town Gwen." Phil commented as he took in the women. "We'll expect you between the first and second period. I'll send a runner for you so you don't get lost." Phil turned to leave when her photo flashed again on the television screen.
Keegan, sensing the conversation was one Gwen didn't want to extend any further than necessary, excused herself. She did not want to talk to the PR manager any longer than necessary. "Come talk when you're free." Keegan nudged Jonathan towards the outside seats.
"If this little inconvenience happens again, when the press asks why I'm not moving to Detroit, I'm going to refer them to the Motors management staff. Am I understood, Mr. Novak?" Phil tugged at his tie trying to get a little more air and nodded leaving the loge. "Fuck." Gwen said as she hung her head. This was not what she bargained for. Tonight was the last night she would have to deal with the Motors front office. Her life was complicated enough. She didn't need the management of the Motors pulling political favors. She stepping into the suite's bathroom she locking the door quietly behind her. Turning on the water taps, she let the stream run for a moment before taking a towel and wetting it. Lifting her head to stare at her reflection in the mirror, she was tired of the games, of the façade she was part of. Her eyes reflected the quiet exterior she wanted to present.
Inside, she was scrambling to figure out how to break down her opponent's defenses without getting burned. Get your head in the game. The reunion with Keegan had her struggling. Even Meg's appearance had her on the defensive. And who was the guy with Keegan tonight? It didn't seem to bother Tony that Keegan showed up with another man. He was a cutie. About the same height as Gwen, he appeared to be fit, not skinny and not overly muscular, very sturdy. She needed to have a heart to heart with Keegan. After her confession in the chapel, she sensed she was loosing ground quickly. If she took a chance and told her how she felt, or if she came on too strong, she may never get another chance. Feeling as if she was robbed of a piece of their relationship, Gwen wanted to know the entire reason behind the breakup. She could not be held accountable for her actions. She didn't have an obligation to Keegan once they broke up. As a single woman, she could do as she pleased. If she didn't know, how was she supposed to act? She did what Keegan asked of her. She left to go play soccer, to win the gold and sleep with whomever she pleased.
The knock on the door brought Gwen out of her train of thought. "Just a moment." Gwen sounded as professional as she could as she patted her face dry.
"Gwen, are you okay?" Keegan's voice called from the other side of the door. Taking in a deep breath, Gwen opened the door and motioned for the small dark haired woman to enter.
Keegan saw the tired and irritated look Gwen's face. A towel was grasped tightly in one hand as the other tried to tame her blonde hair. Her eyes were expressive and for the first time in a long time, Keegan knew her guard was down. "Is there anything I can do?"
Gwen tilted her head to the side and took in Keegan's reflected image. There were a million things she wanted to say. "Not anything at the moment. It's just selling my soul to the devil one more time." Seeing Keegan's eyes widen in shock, Gwen explained farther. "The Motors want me to interview between periods. I have to act like the good little girl and play nice."
"You don't want to play nice?" Keegan's voice dropped an octave as she teased the soccer player. A smile reached Gwen's eyes as she shook her head. Keegan realized she was flirting with Gwen. It had been a long time since she had flirted with anyone, or wanted to.
"Keegan." Gwen turned to face her former girlfriend. She wanted to talk but it never seemed like the right time or enough time. In a bathroom at the Motors arena was definitely not the place or time. "Tonight, after the game, can we talk? Really talk." Reaching a hand out to touch Keegan's arm, Gwen watched as her touch put Keegan's arm hair on its ends. "I leave in the morning and I don't think we've had a chance to really talk."
"Meghan is staying with me. I'm pretty sure neither of you is comfortable with the other." Keegan looked over her shoulder to the closed door. If they didn't exit soon, a discussion would start. "What if I sneak over with you to the interview? Give Mr. Novak a little more to chew on. I can't stand those people."
"What people?" Gwen asked.
"Publicists, journalists." Keegan turned to the door and began to open it.
"You know that is what I'm planning on doing. My interview with SNN is to be a correspondent."
"Gwen it's your life." Keegan opened the door to the glaring eyes of her youngest sister.
"Done?" Meghan's cold voice asked Keegan but her eyes were fixed on Gwen. Keegan slid past her over protective sister.
"Not even started." Gwen challenged back. She wasn't going to let Keegan slip through her fingers again. Even if it took groveling or begging, she would try to get Keegan back in her life.
Jonathan felt as if he was watching a tennis match between the interaction of Keegan, Gwen and Meghan, sensing as if there was a contest going on without anyone knowing the rules. Danny, Ashley and Tony sat at the edge of the divider watching the game having a quiet conversation. An outsider in this family unit he had grown to know over the past couple of years. That is how he thought of the Garry sisters and their group of friends, as a unit, united behind each other, no matter what. He had a feeling Gwen Lerner was a bigger part of this group than he even thought. Keegan had been a shadow when he met her, rail thin with wisps of dark hair starting to grow back. Her workout sessions began slowly. He coached her and let her take the time for rebuilding muscle groups and toning of her body. He had seen pictures of her from college and playing for the National soccer team. She had been stocky if that was possible to imagine. The leukemia and treatments sapped the life out of her. She was a good pupil, trying to understand the concept of yoga and how it could help her recovery. There were times during quiet meditation sessions, he would see tears rolling down her cheeks. He never asked. If she wanted to talk about it, she would. As he shifted from instructor to friend, he knew Keegan kept her feelings guarded, having a quiet way about her that was far removed from the professional athlete she once was. Jumping on a pile of teammates or pumping her fist in high the air, Keegan was a superstar player at Weston. Occasionally, that fiery player would return. As he watched her glare at her youngest sister, he could see traces of her competitive side.
Leaning back in his seat, he concentrated on the game. Sitting in a private suite at the game was much better than the thin padded bar stools and secondary smoke filling his lungs at Rock's. So far a scoreless effort as the Motors took on North Cats of Calgary. Bobby's line was just about ready to come back on the ice when he felt someone sit down next to him. To his surprise, it was Gwen.
"Hello." Gwen smiled as she turned to the left quickly trying to stay out of the camera shot. "Sorry about earlier, I'm just trying to set some boundaries with the Motors. It doesn't seem to matter to them." Gwen explained as she leaned back in her seat.
"But it matters to you." The trainer asked.
"Yes, I try to keep my private life out of the spotlight as much as possible, if you can believe that." Gwen smiled at him. "Most of the public appearances I do are scheduled and planned for a purpose. The Motors are not my favorite at the moment." She leaned forward as a camera swung its lens towards her. Jonathan on her left side blocked the cameraman's angle and the Garry girls blocked the right angle. It was strangely funny to see them sitting together sharing a plate of food. All different shades of hair color, different heights, Keegan being the shortest and Meghan the darkest, yet they had similarities.
"You know if I didn't know they were sisters, I would be able to see it with them sitting together." Jonathan commented as the women laughed at the fifty something vendor trying to hock his "hot nuts" to the section of fans just to the right of the loge.
"They are sisters alright. Piss one off, and you got the whole group on your ass." Gwen sighed, as she knew what it was like to be ganged up on by the siblings. Ash was very receptive to Gwen re-entering Keegan's life. The battle with Meghan was just beginning.
"You know Ashley actually referred Keegan as a client. She and Danny hired me to help whip their employees into shape. IT people get soft middles sitting at the terminal all day. I met Kee during her recovery. She wanted to work out but she couldn't do anything strenuous. So we got together and started a program for her." Jonathan watched the play of emotions over the soccer player's face. "I just met Meghan outside."
"Well, I'm not real high on Meghan's list. You may want to distance yourself from me." Gwen stole a quick glance at the sisters.
"Oh I don't think so. Keegan was smart not to tell me about you and the loge, I would have never shut up." Jonathan began to blush. "I'm a really big fan of your fiancé." He looked at her for a moment. "Really big."
"Stalker like?" She asked. Jonathan laughed as he shook his head. "Good. Keegan has a habit of not giving specific details." Gwen heard the bitterness in her voice and immediately regretted it. "I'm sorry Jonathan. You see I just found out about the leukemia this week. No one told me."
"Ouch." Jonathan offered her some of his wings. "I shouldn't be eating this crap."
"So you offer it to me?" Gwen laughed.
"Always looking for new clients." Jonathan shrugged his shoulders. "That guy said something earlier about Keegan having her appendix out. What was all that about?"
"Keegan and I played on the Olympic soccer team together. She wasn't able to compete in the Greece games because of her appendix."
"She never had her appendix out." Jonathan blurted out then looked at her questionably. He looked at the empty green bottle in front of him. "Do you need anything?"
Gwen shook her head slowly. She was still digesting the fact Keegan did not have her appendix out. Surely Jonathan was wrong. That was the reason she left the team. Her appendix was why she was still in the hospital when Gwen came to see her. The leukemia came later. Jonathan stood up and asked the same of the Garry siblings. Ashley and Meghan took him up on the offer to play waiter.
At the top of the stairs, Tony stood with Danny the pair watched the puck fly across the white surface and into the Cats goal. Horns and buzzers echoed through out the arena.
"Crap, I missed the goal." Jonathan turned back to the ice. His eyes were on Gwen who seemed to be taken back about the appendix. "I'm on a beer run. Need anything?"
"Sure, but I'll get my own and give you a hand." Danny followed the slightly taller man into the loge to the counter area. "Having a good time?"
"You bet. I told Keegan this beats Rock's anytime." After pulling four beers from the mini frig under the counter, Jonathan looked at Danny for a moment. "Danny, I don't mean to pry, but I said something to Gwen about Keegan not having her appendix out." He saw the slight grimace the red head gave. "I didn't mean anything by it."
"Don't worry about it. Keegan and Gwen need to clear the air and maybe it's just what Gwen needed to hear." Danny took the opened beer and titled it back against her lips. "There are too many things unsaid between them." Danny felt the cool liquid soothe her throat.
"I haven't seen you at the gym lately, avoiding me?"
"Avoiding life." Danny grabbed another beer and settled into the seat behind Ashley and Meghan, handing her business partner the beer over her shoulder. Tonight, Meghan was sitting three feet away. She could smell the Envy perfume she usually wore. Danny wished she could ignore the perfume. If Ashley hadn't gotten Meg a bottle for Christmas, Danny would have never guessed the Gucci product. Yet each time she went shopping, she would stop at the counter to smell the sample. Purposely, Danny avoided seeing Meghan, talking to her or even talking about her. When the topic of the Garry girls turned to their younger sibling, Danny retreated to her quiet corner, not wanting to hear about Meghan's. The truth was she was jealous of the women Meghan dated and had a hard time not getting angry. She made a promise never to jeopardize the relationship she had with the Garry family. She had already lost her own family. She couldn't chance losing the relationship with the people she considered her family. She never wanted to be alone again. Her dating history was extremely bumpy. Her relationship with Dory lasted close to sixteen months. The college professor was the last in a long line a women who complained about Danny's inability to commit, the amount of hours she worked and her odd relationship with the Garry family. There wasn't a lack of women vying for her attention. There were a number of women in the community who were trying to pursue and land the wealthy business owner. The latest in the hunt was Robin Frost, an attorney whose firm represented Helping Hands. Danny roused from her thoughts about the raven haired women sitting in front of her. She didn't see the sense in trying to analyze her feelings towards Meghan. She knew she would never act on them. The price was too high to pay. She looked towards Gwen. The blonde had paid a high price without even knowing it. Feeling bad for the soccer player, Danny waved for Gwen to join her.
The blonde stood up to move and immediately the arena spotlight flashed onto her. Followed by a loud cheer and clapping as the cameras flashed her picture on the jumbo screen at the center of the ice. Gwen felt the professional persona take over as she lifted her hand in a wave to the fans and plastered the camera smile on her face. Ashley jumped up and began waving like a freak as her image appeared on the large television in the center of the ice.
"You okay?" Danny asked as the sullen mood emanated from Gwen.
"Sometimes, I just wish I was able to go to the game and enjoy it. I feel like the center ring of the three ring circus." The irritation in her voice rose. "The Motors want me to do a spot during the first intermission."
"Not liking that?" Danny took a long drawn out sip of her beer. Gwen shook her head. "Take Keegan with you. Get her out under Meg's watchful."
"You know, I used to be really close with her." Gwen said as she stared at the back of Meghan's head. "Now she won't even give me a chance to explain."
"She's trying to protect Keegan. She doesn't want to see her sister hurt." Danny whispered. "No one wants to be hurt. What's the saying, life isn't fair?" Danny said as she took a long pull off her beer. Gwen saw the look in Danny's face soften for a moment before it quickly disappeared.
Chapter 15
Bright hot lights illuminated the small commentary area in the Motors broadcast booth. The camera operator pulled back to block the shoot of the three figures being prepared for air. Gwen shifted slightly as the production assistant tried to place a microphone on her blouse. From her spot against the wall, Keegan could see how the young man's hand shook. His fingers reached for and receded as he tried to figure out where to place the microphone near Gwen's cleavage. In frustration, Gwen took the audio unit from him and clipped it to her blouse between her breasts.
As the frightened Production Assistant stepped away to ready the earpiece, Gwen looked up to find amused blue eyes watching her. Keegan leaned against the half wall of the control room, her booted feet crossed at the ankles. Her jeans were a bit long but still fit her well. The Brady Sullivan jersey covered her waistband. Gwen thought it was cute how she attempted to cover her expanding midsection. Gwen smiled back, knowing Keegan found her annoyance with the production crew entertaining. In fact the wet clammy hands of the PA gave Gwen the creeps, but Keegan flashed a reassuring smile that calmed her. She let out a sigh when the man came back and touched her behind the ear.
"You finished?" Gwen snapped the fumbling man. Why do they always send the one who looked like they want to tear her clothes off? His startled face gave a small nod as he handed her the IFB. He quickly moved away from the guest.
"Play nice. He is just trying to do his job." Keegan said as she stepped forward squatting next to Gwen's chair.
"Easy for you to say. He was looking at me as if I was a piece of meat." Gwen argued back. When Keegan flashed a lopsided grin, Gwen felt her cheeks flush. She had seen that grin before and she knew exactly where Keegan's mind went.
"No comment." Keegan laugh out loud at Gwen's uneasiness.
"Laugh it up." Gwen noted as she brushed her hair out of her eyes. "Do I look okay?" They both stopped breathing for a moment as memories came flooding back. Transforming them to an earlier time when Gwen asked Keegan the same question. Over the years together, Keegan's answer had never waivered.
The response "You look beautiful" was on the tip of Keegan's tongue, because she knew it to be true. Gwen was always beautiful. Today, there were too many production people milling about. The Motors' front office was very present in the appearance of Phil Novak and Victor Eisenmann. Instead, Keegan nodded, holding Gwen's soft eyes with her own. At that moment, Keegan knew she was in trouble. She couldn't let Gwen get close. There were too many feeling between them, too much time lost and too many differences that needed work to be resolved. She conceded the fact she would always love Gwen, no matter what. But there were too many changes and too many outside factors to have a relationship with her again.
"How are you enjoying the game, Miss Garry?" Huey Carmichael, long time Detroit area sports announcer leaned towards the women and asked.
"I'd like a bigger lead, but I'll take what we have so far." Keegan shyly answered. She had done multiple interviews with the silver haired announcer over the years. He and a crew from Channel Seven actually went out to San Diego to do a piece on her making the National Team.
"Well, Mr. Finch is a prize addition to the team. Wouldn't you say so?" Huey's sharp eyes were working overtime. "Ms. Garry are you going to join us for the interview?" His deep baritone voice had a way of swaying the audience to his point of view.
"Now Huey, you know I don't do interviews any more." Keegan crossed her arms over her chest closing the subject.
"That my dear is a shame. So is this a reunion of sorts, former teammates?"
"Just friends, Huey." Keegan gave him an award-winning smile. "I no longer play so therefore there is no reunion, not teammates, just friends. Besides, Gwen retired."
"Clamming up like always Miss Garry, but your fans would like to hear from you someday. You're safe, I'll quit with the questions this time." Huey waved a dismissive hand towards Keegan as she faded into the distance as the announcer turned his focus on the retired Olympian.
"Sorry." She said softly to Gwen as she listened to the crew scrambling to figure out what Huey was rambling about. She had kept out of the spotlight on purpose. She was no longer a public figure. Because the university employed her, she still gave her time to Weston when they asked, but they knew better than to push too hard. Her only claim to fame was she had brought home the Division Two - Women's National Championship. She had a few CAPS as she played in International soccer games, including a World Cup, but she never played an Olympic game. She never won a medal. She wasn't America's Sweetheart.
"After one period, the Motor's lead the Cats by a score of one to nothing. Detroit's latest acquisition, Bob Finch has caused quite a stir on and off the ice. We are pleased to be joined by Gwen Lerner, gold medal winner and a close acquaintance of Bob's." Huey waited as the cameras switched to wide shot of the group. Gwen smiled and waved into the camera. "Enjoying the game?"
"Absolutely." The camera flashed a close up of Gwen. "Glad to be here cheering on the Motors. I'm hoping we can hold on to the lead. There is still some time to go before it's over." Gwen let her eyes slip over to Keegan as her words echoed in her head.
"How's your visit to Detroit been?" Sean Mullins the second announcer asked.
"So far great! The people are wonderful, the team has been terrific. The weather on the other hand, what can I say, I'm a California girl."
"I see you have some friends with you in the suite." The loge came on to the screen as Ashley, Jonathan, Tony, Danny and Meghan waved frantically at the camera.
"I've got a few friends in town. They have been kind enough to play tour guide and keep me busy. This past week has been very busy for Bob and I though. The Emerald Banquet at Weston Inn raised over $500,000 for the foundation. We were at the Children's unit at Weston Hospital visiting the facility, children and their families."
"Any children in the future for you?" Huey slid the remark in before Gwen knew it.
"Children?" Gwen leaned back and placed her hand on her chest. She smiled. A week ago, her answer would have been a resounding no. She laughed and said, "Never say never Huey."
"So what is Bob's take on living in the Midwest?" Sean piped in trying to steal any attention from Huey.
"As you should know, Bob is from Hamilton, Ontario and went to university in Chicago. He knows more about the Midwest and winter than I do."
"Still making your home in San Jose?" Huey's eyes studied her closely.
"If I move here to be with Bob, you'll be the first know." Gwen winked at the older announcer who blushed profusely.
"Good to know." Huey chuckled lightly as his shoulders shook slightly. "So what does the future hold for America's Sweetheart since you've decided to retire from professional soccer?"
"There are a few irons in the fire. I want to enjoy my time off. Actually visit places I travel to, not just the airport and the soccer stadium.
"From our vantage point, I see that you have met up with your former teammate and one of our hometown heroes, Keegan Garry." Without warning, the camera turned to Keegan as she leaned against the wall. Keegan felt nauseated as her form was projected on to the screen. The screen was split to a photo of her scoring a goal for Weston. "Do you think she'll honor us with few words?" Huey smirked at the camera irritating Gwen to the fullest.
Gwen had played this game for too long and she wasn't about to let Huey Carmichael bully Keegan into doing something she didn't want too. Leaning forward across Sean Mullins lap, she got everyone's attention as she smiled sweetly at Huey and said. "No." Huey and Sean laughed at the antics.
"Understand, I had to try." Huey held his hands in the air. "So, I mentioned earlier the reference to America's Sweetheart. I'm going to ask the questions we are all wondering. How did you get that flag to stay in place?"
Dirty old man, Keegan thought as she had wondered the same thing many times before.
"Let's just say its amazing what industrial strength double faced tape will do." Gwen stated as the crew began to flash the wrap up signs.
"Thanks for joining us tonight Gwen and we look forward to seeing you in the future." Sean Mullins took the wrap lines.
"Great to be here. Sean, Huey….Go Motors!" Gwen smiled as she shook both men's hands.
"Clear…" Someone in the production crew yelled.
"Nice Huey…" Gwen shot him an off camera look that wasn't so pleasant. "She doesn't do interviews. Don't be surprised if you hear from her attorney for that stunt with the spilt screen." Gwen's hackles rose to protect Keegan from the press. She didn't want her presence to cause Keegan any stress.
"No hard feeling Keegan?" Huey tried to get the former Weston stand out to agree with his actions.
"No feeling at all Huey." Keegan looked at the jumbo screen in the middle of the arena. Plastered on all four sides was a photo of Keegan and Gwen from the national team.
"You look good, slimmed down a bit." His comment was followed by his eyes roaming over her body. "I'm free for an interview."
"There's no such thing as free. There's always a price to pay." Keegan said then followed Gwen's storming figure out the door. Half way back to the suite, Gwen turned to face her.
"I'm sorry he tried that with you." Gwen ran her hand through her hair. "I shouldn't have asked you to go with me." She placed her hand on Keegan's forearm. "I'm really sorry."
"Gwen, you can't control what people do." Keegan studied the worried look in her brown eyes. "Besides, I was wondering about the flag." Keegan continued walking. "Double faced tape, interesting." Gwen fell into step next to her.
"You should have been there when I tried to remove it. Let's just say, I didn't need a bikini wax for quite some time." Keegan stopped her eyes immediately went to Gwen's crotch and shuttered.
"TMI! Ouch!" Keegan grimaced just thinking about the removal from a person's skin.
"Ouch is on the right track, but not even close." Gwen's laugh filtered through the air as she left Keegan standing in shock behind her.
#
White knuckles gripped the steering wheel as the roads with covered with a half foot of freshly fallen snow. The team was held for special closed-door meetings after they let a three-goal lead disappear in the third period. Bobby was off the ice for two of the goals but the Cats got the offense running and tied the game. Neither the coach nor the team was happy. The glaring look Keegan received from Meghan, showed her sister's displeasure when she offered to drive Gwen home. The night was enough to send Keegan in a tailspin. How could she get her sister to understand her connection with Gwen, if she barely understood where they stood? When Bobby got stuck at the arena for an undisclosed amount of time, Keegan didn't want to leave Gwen there alone. Not knowing what time the team would be released and scheduled on an early flight in the morning, Gwen happily accepted Keegan's offer. A pouting Meghan asked Ashley to spend the night at her place so she could spend time with her sister and see Andy first thing in the morning.
Keegan pulled her small SUV into Bobby's drift covered driveway. Releasing the breath she did not realize she was holding. Turing to her passenger, she gave her a wary smile.
"Here you are."
"Was it me or was that just a little scary?"
"Road crews should be out now." Keegan looked at her tire tracks in the blanket of drifts and snow covering the street. Her tire prints were the only ones cutting through the snow. Since leaving the crowd of the arena, her truck was the only vehicle on the road. No signs of any movement as they came into residential areas, no plows or other vehicles appeared as the storm got worse. She looked over her shoulder at the drift forming across the street. She still had a twenty-minute ride back to her house. In these conditions, it would take her at least an hour.
""Keegan." Gwen called waited until her friend turned to face her. "Stay here. There wasn't a plow out. I'd feel a lot better." Gwen could just feel the stress of having Keegan drive out in the blizzard.
"I'll be fine." She said just as her cell phone chimed. Ashley's house number came up on the caller id. "Hello." Keegan answered as she flipped open the phone.
"Where are you?" Meghan's voice demanded.
"Gee, Mom just dropping off my date now." The sarcasm was evident. Covering the mouthpiece, she formed the word "Meghan" to Gwen.
"Funny. Listen we just got home. The roads aren't even touched. Stay at Gwen's-Bobby's whatever. Just stay there, please."
"What?" Gwen asked as Keegan's eyebrows lifted in surprise.
"Can you repeat that?"
"Stay with Gwen." Meghan's voice huffed out.
"Who is this? Surely this isn't Meghan Garry who glared and sent evil scary looks towards her host all night is it?"
"Ha! I love you. Put Gwen on the phone." Meghan demanded. She didn't like being called out on the carpet and having to eat crow at the same time.
"Hang on." Keegan pulled the phone away from her ear holding it out for Gwen. "She wants to talk to you." Gwen was taken back by the request but placed the phone to her ear.
"Hello."
"Gwen." Meghan's voice rang clear. "I want you to listen to me carefully." Controlled anger was just under the surface as Gwen braced herself for the onslaught of Meg's temper. "Keegan is to stay with you. Do Not! Repeat, Do Not let her drive home."
"I agree." Gwen fidgeted in the passenger's seat.
"Good, if she leaves, I will find you and kill you. Am I clear?"
"Meg, I will do as requested, but remember she is just as stubborn as you."
Meghan listened to Gwen's answer as she stood in the middle of Ashley's kitchen. They made it home but the roads were horrible and she was grateful for the Lexus LX570 Danny drove. The luxury SUV had no problem getting through the snow covered roads. Meghan was relieved she didn't have to drive and Gwen was keeping Keegan off the roads. She hit the button on the phone and hung it up.
"What?" Meghan asked as she saw Danny staring at her. "I'm worried about Keegan." Meghan's tongue felt thick. She had managed not to be cornered by Danny all night.
"I am too, but you realize you just threatened to kill Gwen." Danny's auburn eyebrow rose questioningly.
"Not the first time." Meghan shrugged her shoulders. "Won't be the last." She stared at Danny, putting her hand over her heart. "Are you talking to me again?"
"I never stopped." Danny lied.
"Please, you are still freaked about Christmas." Meghan shook her head. "Don't worry I won't interfere with whatever weird thing you and Ash have going on." Meghan stepped closed and whispered. "I won't tell Ash about the kiss." She let out a warm breath on Danny's ear lobe and neck.
Danny felt the heat from Meghan's closeness and wanted nothing more than for her lips to touch her, to brand her skin. She closed her eyes for a moment and imagined Meghan kissing her neck, sucking on her ear, whispering words of passion. Danny quickly pushed the thoughts away as she gently pushed Meghan a few steps back.
"Ashley and I have nothing but a close friendship. Period! As for me not speaking with you, I think your actions here tonight show why I chose not to make conversation with you." Danny started to wrap her scarf around her neck to venture home. "Why don't you cut Gwen a break? She just found out about Kee being sick and she's trying very hard to understand and make sense of the whole thing. We've known this would happen. I didn't think it would take five years for Gwen to walk back into your sister's life, but I knew it would happen. Why can't you be happy for them? At least for Keegan, I haven't seen her happy in a long time." Danny was seething. Meghan was acting like a petulant child.
"Now what are you fighting about?" Ashley came in with a sleeping Andy in her arms. She handed the three-year-old to Meghan. "You're acting like sisters."
"We're definitely not sisters!" Meghan said as she hoisted Andy higher in her arms and took him up to his room.
"Finally something I can agree with you on." Danny called after Meg. Her arms crossed tightly over her chest.
"And get your coat off. You're staying here even if you do have a monster truck. Guest room one." Ashley pointed to Meghan as she came into the kitchen. "Take the blue room." She said to Danny. Mumbling something under her breath she went into the pantry and came back with a bottle of Crown Royal. "Who wants a shot?" The women looked at her for a moment. "I swear you are driving me to drink. Both of you." Ashley pour three shot glasses and slid them towards her overnight guests.
"Jesus.." Gwen shook her head as Meghan's venomous threat echoed in her head. "Stubborn all of you. What is it with your family?" Gwen gathered herself together as she flipped the phone shut. Handing it to Keegan, she purposely let it slip to the floorboard. "Oops."
"Shit." Keegan repositioned her body to gain access to the floorboard, being pregnant and in a winter coat was not an easy task. When she leaned down to grab the phone, Gwen snatched the keys from the ignition and held them tight in her hand. "Hey…" Keegan reached for the keys. Holding the keys above her head in tight in her right hand, with her left Gwen grabbed Keegan's hand.
"Listen to me. You're crazy sister just threatened me with bodily harm if I let you leave. Crazy as she is, I do agree with her. I really don't want the guilt on my conscience if something happened to you, so drop it and get in the house." Gwen opened her door, quickly stepped on the frozen ground, slipped and landed on her back in the snow. "Fuck." Gwen scrambled to her feet as the icy substance slid under her clothing. She felt a piece slide down her back. "Man, that's cold." Taking small steps she made her way to the front bumper and waited for Keegan. "Come on, it's cold and slick."
"I'd rather be home." Keegan stepped from the truck and slipped slightly as she shut the door. No keys had her bending to Gwen's antics.
"Not by yourself." Gwen grabbed a hold of her arm and escorted Keegan to the front door. Sliding the key in, she battled to unlock the front door. Finally the cylinder gave and she pushed it open for Keegan to enter. The townhouse was warm compared to outside temperature.
"I could call Carrie." Keegan regretted the flippant comment as soon as she made it. Gwen looked crushed but she nodded and shut the door.
"If that's what you want to do." She shed her coat and hung it up in the entrance closet. She was not going to get into Keegan's choice of relationships. If Keegan wanted to spend time with Carrie, that was her business. Gwen would not allow it to bother her, yet she was steaming from the comment. How could she like that woman? "The place is pretty empty." Gwen commented, trying to change the subject as Keegan took in the open space of Bobby's home. Slipping off her boots she left them on the rug to catch the melting snow. "He's renting this for the season." Gwen explained as she checked the thermostat. Bobby hadn't done much except for getting a deal on rental furniture that filled the bedrooms, the living room and the kitchen. The walls were painted a stark white with a couple modern cubist paintings hanging the walls.
"It's very…very." Keegan searched for the polite thing to say.
"Unlived in." Gwen blew on her hands trying to gain some warmth. "We went and looked at a house this morning. It's closer to yours. I think Bobby likes the area."
"Oh yeah. I bet he's lonely." Keegan slipped off her coat and boots taking in the open space of the living room. Stacked on the floor next to the television was a stack of DVDs. Keegan felt the cold seep into her veins. She suddenly felt guilty about the comment she made about Carrie. "Gwen, I didn't mean what I said. I don't want to go home. I don't want to be with Carrie either."
"Then why say something like that, Keegan? I'm just trying to establish some type of friendship with you. If that is jeopardizing a relationship you are in." With your gynecologist. "Then I will stop."
"I'm not in a relationship with Carrie or anyone else." Keegan sank on to the couch. She said it to make Gwen jealous. "I'm not sure what you want from me Gwen. You dropping back into my life set off this ticking bomb and I'm not sure what you want." Keegan looked at the digital clock on the cable box.
"A friend back in my life." Gwen said as she sat down on the couch one leg tucked under the other as she faced sideways looking directly at Keegan.
"In a few hours, you'll be back in California and I won't matter any more." Keegan felt the sting of tears in her eyes, just like she hadn't mattered five years earlier. Gwen would just move on without her once again.
"You've always mattered to me Keegan. I'm not sure where our wires got crossed but one day, we're living together sharing a future. The next, you're back in Michigan without telling me, refusing to talk to me or to return my calls. Finally, when I do see you, you break up with me. How am I supposed to feel?" Gwen thought back to hospital visit. The last conversation she had with Keegan.
"Go back to the team where you're needed. I don't want you here." Keegan hit the call button at the side of her bed. When a nurse's form filled the doorway, Gwen glanced down at her hand.
"I don't understand why you are doing this Keegan. I thought we had something special I thought you loved me as much as I love you." Gwen twisted off the ring on her finger. She felt the tears pooling in her eyes. Never one to cry she found that she was doing it quite often since Keegan left. She got to her feet, straightening her shirt out and brushing invisible lint from the front of her jeans. "If you want to find me, you know where I'll be. Maybe I'll understand this some day but I can't right now." The blonde turned and walked towards the doorway.
"Why did you come? You had everything on the line, the Olympics." Keegan's question brought her back to the present as she tried to hide her tears with her hand.
"Because I loved you. You were my life and you left me." Gwen got up and paced the room. She needed a drink. Rubbing her forehead with her fingers she felt the migraine coming on in full force. "Do you want some tea?" Gwen said as she turned to the kitchen, trying to occupy her mind with a mundane task.
Keegan closed her eyes and leaned her head on the back of the couch. Loved was what Gwen had said. Not I love you, but I loved you. She knew the mistake she had made was coming back to haunt her. Tara and Ashley wanted her to be truthful with Gwen. Instead, she thought could control the situation. Maybe that was her downfall, she had just told Gwen tonight she couldn't control the actions of others. Why was she trying to do the same thing? Placing her hands on her thighs, she wiped off the nervous sweat. She stood up and went into the kitchen. She found Gwen standing next to the counter, watching the teakettle as it heated. Keegan wrapped her arms around Gwen's waist from behind, clasping her hands together across her stomach. Leaning her cheek against Gwen's spine she felt Gwen's hands covered her own. "I thought I knew what I was doing. I didn't want you to know about the leukemia until after the Games. Gwen, I didn't want you to miss the Olympics. I thought if I could just keep avoiding you, we could talk after the Games. Fuck." Keegan sighed deeply and pulled away from the warmth of Gwen.
"Tell me what happened. Tell me why you left my room and hopped on a flight to Michigan without one word." Gwen turned to face her former lover. "Not a word. I knew something was wrong. I even asked you." Gwen ran her hands over her face trying to gather some semblance of composer. She waited five years for this conversation and now she wasn't sure she wanted to know.
"After the collision with Shannon." Keegan began she pulled out a wooden chair scraping the legs across the tile floor with a heaviness. "They couldn't get my nose to stop bleeding. Suddenly, Dr. Seng was there and Curtis." She sat down and told Gwen the truth of why their relationship changed.
When the familiar face of Dr. Seng entered the drab white tiled, sherbet colored examination room, Keegan became concerned. The team's doctor of over twenty years, the small Asian woman could intimidate the majority of the team and coaching staff. The silver tuft of hair on the doctor's head stood out against her raven mane. Her uniform white jacket and the rose colored blouse under it were in severe need of ironing. The dry cleaned black slacks were crumbled and the normal pleats along the front were not as prominent. Her ruffled appearance seemed out of place along with the nervous play of eyeglasses hanging from a gold chain around her neck. Very out of character for the stoic doctor, her professionalism seemed to be left on the West Coast. In the years Keegan had been on the National Team, she had never seen the team doctor appear mussed or disheveled. When the doctor pulled a chair along side of Keegan's, she realized something was seriously wrong.
"Keegan," She placed a sun spotted soft hand on Keegan's thigh. "How have you been feeling?"
"Any issues with being tired? Loss of breath?" Moving her hand away from the soccer player, she began to flip the papers on the chart.
"Dr Seng, I'm a soccer player. I'm always tired and the traveling has my system out of sorts." Keegan straightened up in the leathery office chair. Purposely avoiding looking at the physician, her eyes went to the wall, taking in the pastel painting on the wall. A nice seascape that looked similar to the view from the rental home she and Gwen stayed in Provincetown two years ago for vacation. The waves appeared to be crashing against the sand. The small trolling boat bobbed with the waves as the flags on its masts and lines flapped furiously against the wind. The white starboard side gave way to the red painted bottom showing its color as the artist captured the motion of the ocean.
"In some of the tests performed, there were some abnormalities with your blood cell count. The doctors at Jefferson and I recommend further testing." The Asian woman spoke softly tearing Keegan's attention away from the painting.
"What does that mean? Abnormalities? Further testing? I'm getting on a plane in the morning to head with the team to Rome. The Olympics are weeks away. The Olympics." Keegan's voice was rising as she spoke. When she tried to stand up, the doctor placed a firm grasp on her forearm.
"At this time, we can not allow you to continue with the team." Keegan's world stopped. She had been dreaming about this since was eight years old. Her skills on the field landed her on the national teams recruiting radar when she was fourteen years old. Able to attend the Weston on soccer scholarship, she led the university to its first national championship. Making the national team four years ago, she was looking forward to going to the next step, playing in the Olympics. Achieving the ultimate goal of winning a gold medal. The hard work she had put in all these years seemed to be slipping away in front of her eyes.
"You need to see your doctor as soon as you get home." Dr. Seng continued to speak but the shock of information left Keegan's brain swimming. "We can transmit what we have found to Weston University's staff. You are going to go back to Michigan?" The doctor's questioning words echoed in her head.
"Stop!" Keegan held up her hand to the petit Asian woman. "It's just a fucking bloody nose!" As her voice elevated, Coach Curtis walked into the room. His hazel eyes went looked into Keegan's crystal blue ones. "What's happening?" Keegan asked the man who coached her in international play and the world cup.
"Keegan," Curtis took off his hat and ran his large tan hand through the grayish black strands. "Your blood tests came back with extremely high white blood cell count. The medical staff and coaches are not allowed to let you on the field until you are released."
"So you're cutting me?"
"Not cut, medically inactive." Watching the information register on her face, Curtis continued. "You're a fabulously talented player. As policy, you need to be medically cleared in order to continue playing. The staff can't clear you." Curtis watched her face as the realization sunk in. She wasn't going to Rome or to Greece. Her dreams of playing in the Olympics were ending.
"When am I leaving?" She asked, her voice quiet.
"We'd like you to go tonight, but there are no flights. Keegan this is serious. Your health is much more important than any soccer game." Curtis admonished her in a fatherly way. She nodded her head slowly. Feeling as if her heart was stuck in her throat she tried to swallow.
"Are there other tests?" Her question was answered by Dr. Seng nod. "If this is nothing…" Keegan waved her hand absently in the air.
"Curtis," She called to the exiting figure. "I don't want anyone to know about this. I have that right."
"People will know what you tell them." The coach nodded as he left.
"Ms. Garry an abnormal blood count isn't always what it appears to be." Dr. Seng ran her finger over page as she read the numbers. "Sometimes heavy physical stress or infection."
"No, they ran test after test. The leukemia was confirmed a few days before you came to the hospital." Keegan wiped her tears away. "I didn't want to tell you in Miami because I didn't know."
"And when you did know why didn't you tell me?" Gwen leaned a hip on the counter, her arms crossed over her chest waiting.
"The Olympics, I knew how disappointed you were when you brought home the silver. I wanted you to have a chance to win the gold. After the team won the gold, I was going tell you. I just needed time."
"And in the mean time, you break up with me. Hurt me. Scratch that. Devastate me. You knew how much I loved you! Us. We were a couple, a couple who shared everything. But I guess we didn't share everything." Gwen grunted.
"If I had told you I was sick, I knew what you would have done."
"And what would I have done?" Gwen huffed out and let out a squeak as the tea water came to a boil. She quickly turned off the burner and poured the steaming water into the cups with tea bags. "If you knew me so well Keegan what would I have done?"
"You would have given it all up to be at my side." Keegan stared at Gwen's back, her slumping shoulders heaved slightly.
"Since you didn't give me the opportunity to make my own choice, I guess we will never know what I would have done. Instead, here we are. It's hard to make the right decision if you don't have all the information." Gwen straightened up and brought the cup of tea to the table. She set it in front of Keegan and sat down next to her. Her hands neatly folded around the hot ceramic coffee mug. "Is there anything else you want to tell me?"
"I never had my appendix out. It was a way to have the press out of the way without bringing too much attention to the situation." Keegan confessed.
"Thank you but Jonathan told me that factoid earlier tonight." Running her hand through her hair, she took a moment to breathe. To take in the information Keegan was telling her. "Would you do it again?"
The question took Keegan by surprise. She cleared her eyes and stared at Gwen. "No." Keegan realized withholding the truth from Gwen cost their relationship. She wished she hadn't. "I can't change what happened."
"If you could would you?" Gwen was now facing Keegan her back pressed against the cabinets.
"Yes."
"Why?"
"I never wanted to lose you." Keegan felt the warmth of Gwen's hand slip on to her forearm. With the slight reassuring squeeze from Gwen, the tension released from her body. She had held on to the burden of loosing Gwen because she didn't tell her what was happening. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you." Keegan wiped a tear away.
"You're forgiven. Can we move forward from here? I'd like to be friends again Keegan. I've missed you." Gwen confessed.
"I'd like that too." Keegan covered Gwen's hand with her own. There were no promises, no complications, just a willingness to be friends again. The clock on the wall clicked towards the one o'clock hour. "I'll take the couch."
"Absolutely not." Gwen began to protest when her cell phone rang. "Hang on." Gwen flipped her cell open. "Hey there did he finally let you out?"
"Out yes…home no. They are keeping us here or at the hotel attached to the arena. Did you make it home okay? Is Keegan okay?" Bobby's voice was full of concern.
"We are at your house as we speak. I was just protesting to her offer to sleep on the couch."
"Tell her I'd advise against it, from personal experience. I'll be home as soon as I can. Gwen, I don't think you are leaving anytime soon or at least not this morning. They cancelled the Cats flight out."
"Great. I'll call Hannah in the morning to see what I need to do. Stay warm and I'll talk to you tomorrow." Gwen saw Keegan watching her. "He's stuck at the arena and staying at the hotel there. Flights out tomorrow are already cancelled."
"Will that mess up your schedule?" Keegan stood up and took her cup to the sink and poured out the remaining lukewarm contents in the sink. She placed her hands on the small of her back and tried to massage some of the ache away.
"No, I don't have anything to go home to. I have to be in San Diego next Tuesday, but I should be able to get out by then." Gwen followed Keegan's action by dumping her tea in the sink. "Is your back hurting?" She rubbed small circles on Keegan's lower lumbar. "Bobby said not to even attempt to sleep on the couch. I'll sleep in his room." Gwen made sure the house was secure and turning off the lights. Keegan waited for her in the hallway. "The spare room is where I've been staying." She wanted to make sure Keegan didn't have the idea of her sharing Bobby's bed. Gwen opened the spare room and stepped. "I just wanted to grab something to sleep in."
"That's a change." Keegan blurted out as her face turned red.
"It's cold Keegan." Gwen took a pair of sweats out of her suitcase. "I should get you some clothes. Do you want something or are you sleeping in the buff?" Gwen cocked an eyebrow up as she smirked at Keegan's discomfort.
"Like you said, it's cold out." Keegan repeated, her face still burning. She took in the tight lipped grin on Gwen's face.
A sleeping outfit in hand, Gwen stood up to explore the closet and dresser. "Bob's sisters and kids came down a few times maybe they left some clothes that will fit you." Gwen found a pair of sweats for her. "I think it pays to have siblings."
"No kidding. These are Danny's." Keegan pointed her jeans.
"I always thought you wanted to get into Danny's pants." Gwen teased her again and Keegan's face lit up. "You need to relax. I'm kidding." Gwen stepped out the door and gestured to the door across the hallway. "Holler if you need anything."
Keegan gave her a nod and held up the very large sweatshirt with the Canadian Maple Leaf. Grabbing the hem of her jersey she lifted the garment off. Just as the shirt reached her face, a string of profanity came from across the hallway.
"That little shit. What a pig sty." Gwen stood with her clothes still her in hands. The sight before her was pure chaos. The room was littered with clothing from the mound spilling from the closet, to multiple layers covering the floor. "I can't even see what color the carpet is." Gwen complained. Her eyes went to the bed, which was a pile of disarrayed sheets and blankets with pants, underwear and shirts covering every inch.
"Wow…." Keegan stopped at the sight before her. "Guess you didn't expect this."
"I'm not cleaning it." Gwen put a hand on her hip. "Want some company? It will be like old times, but not exactly." They stared at each other for a moment. The fear that gripped Keegan earlier that night came back full force.
"Not exactly." Keegan let out a nervous breath as she headed to the bathroom. Looking at her reflection in the mirror, she felt old. Her face had aged and wrinkled. Her body was slimmer, but still wasn't as toned as she would like. "You can do this." Keegan spoke brave words. Inside she was scared. She should just leave. Run away like she always did. She had left Gwen in Miami and in the restaurant. Things got uncomfortable and she was off and running. She pulled off her clothes and put on the sweat shirt. She smoothed down the material which hung to the tops of her knees. The pants were enormous so she didn't bother with them. Splashing water on her face, she studied her reflection in the mirror. She and Gwen were both adults. They had shared the same bed hundreds of time before. This was not a big deal. So why was her heart pounding against her chest and her hands sweating? She finished up her preparation grateful for the new toothbrush Bobby had in the cabinet. Drying her face, she gathered her courage and left the bathroom.
Stopping abruptly at the doorway to the bedroom, she watched Gwen sitting in the bed waiting for her to return. Her back against the headboard, a magazine opened in her lap as she flipped through the pages. Her blonde hair framed her face and pair of glasses perched on her nose. She had chosen the side of the bed she was familiar with sleeping on.
"I didn't know you had glasses."
"I got them about a year ago. For reading mostly." Gwen set the magazine on the nightstand watching Keegan as she approached the bed taking in her outfit and the absence of pants. "Little big?"
"A little. Look at this." Keegan stepped back to show her how long the shirt was. "Don't even ask about the pants." Gwen chuckled as Keegan slipped into the bed beside her. "I have to work tomorrow so I maybe gone when you get up." Keegan adjusted her pillow.
"Promise me you'll say goodbye before you leave." Gwen whispered. Keegan looked into her eyes and saw the hurt.
"I promise." Keegan lean towards her and touched her lips lightly to Gwen's. "Never again. Okay. I promise. Good night." Keegan nervously sputtered. She settled down and closed her eyes mentally chastening herself for doing what came naturally. She leaned over and kissed Gwen goodnight. Her heart was pounding in her ears and she waited for Gwen to say something. Instead, she heard the light click off and Gwen settle on the bed. A few minutes of Gwen flipping and flopping, she felt the blonde body press against her from behind.
"Keegan, let me hold you." Gwen whispered in her ear. Keegan nodded and shifted in to the familiar spot of her back against Gwen chest. Gwen wrapped arms around her and held her securely. With their legs intertwined and a soft breathe caressing her cheek.
Keegan felt the emptiness in her heart recede. Just breathe, she thought, letting the mantra ran through her head until she fell asleep.