~ Sergeant of the Heart ~
by C. E. Gray


Disclaimer: This is an Uber story, so the characters are mine, and the plot. If you wanna borrow anything, ask first. J All work is copyrighted once you submit it on the internet, but for argument's sake, this work is Copyrighted © by C. E. Gray, 2001

Violence/Language Disclaimer: Yep, definite violence in here. There's a soldier in here with one heck of a temper if you tick her off. She's not afraid of four-letter words, either.

Sexual Disclaimer: Sure! Oh, I mean, yeah, it's in here. Not real graphic, but you get the idea. This does involve the idea (heck it revolves around the idea) that two women are in love, and express that love when given the chance. If this bothers you, I suggest you click back, and find something else to read - it's a big Xenaverse out there, folks.

Last Disclaimer: I have tried to make sure most of the scenes in this story are close to being reasonably realistic. However, to the thanks of my muse, I have brought my creative license into use a time or two.

Notes of Thanks: I'd like to thank my beta-reader and best friend, Amber, for putting up with me through all of this. Also, everyone who's given me responses about Taken, my first attempt at Uber fan fiction - I only know how I'm doing if I get feedback. Another thank you to all those who helped me with the bugs in this thing - I think we got 'em all!

If you like the way it turned out, thank them. If you don't, blame the author. J

You can feed this bard at: Y02Mustang@AOL.com I guarantee a response.

Now, enough of the formal mumbo-jumbo. On with the show!

"Fool," said my muse to me, "look in thy heart and write."

- Sir Philip Sydney


Part 5 (Conclusion)

Chapter Twenty-Two

Kris sighed as she brought in the morning watching the sun come up. The soldier hadn't slept all night, and the butterflies in her stomach had yet to rest, either. The nightmare had returned with a vengeance, seeming to go in slow motion and prolonging the soldier's torture.

True to her word, Kris reluctantly awoke Ryanne, but by the time the blonde was awake enough to listen and Kris was calm enough to talk, the dark images had faded from her mind. The terror was there, but Kris was unable to bring the bloody picture to the surface.

"Do you remember anything?" asked Ryanne, and Kris shook her head.

"Just the fear," she whispered, knowing the small woman was the only one she'd ever let know her deepest feelings, and not have to worry about being "kicked while she was down".

The blonde pulled the woman into her arms, and simply held her close until they both fell asleep again.

But Kris wasn't asleep for long. Deciding not to wake Ryanne this time, the soldier knew any hope for rest was futile. Giving in to her growing apprehension, Kris stared at the ceiling and fiddled with a corner of the blanket until dawn, when Ryanne awoke.

"Have you been up all night?" the blonde asked.

Kris nodded. "I can't go to sleep, Ryanne, I'm too nervous," she admitted. "I'm worried about what Mark will say."

"You don't think he'll help you?" questioned Ryanne, quietly.

"I know he'll help, I just don't know what he'll think if I tell him I need to see a psychiatrist."

Ryanne leaned over and gave the soldier a reassuring hug. "Kris, there's nothing to worry about - I'm sure Mark will understand," she soothed. Reluctantly, Kris agreed, and got up to take a shower.

* * * * *

"Kris, come in," greeted Mark, motioning the woman inside the office, slightly worried when she immediately sat down across from him, and Ryanne followed close behind, standing next to her.

"RC," he acknowledged, and she smiled. "What can I do for you ladies?"

Kris took a deep breath. "I…" she began.

"We," corrected Ryanne, taking the woman's hand.

"We need your help," said the soldier, and Mark was really concerned - what was going on for Kris to feel she not only needed his help, but couldn't do it without Ryanne backing her?

"Of course," he said, right away. "How can I help?"

"I, uh, I've been having these nightmares, but I can't remember what they're about," said Kris, lowly. "I think I need to see… someone."

Captain Bowman was kind and understanding. "I know a good psychiatrist - he's a friend of Beverly's. His name is Dr. Carl Haggis. I can make a few calls, and I'm sure he'll see you this afternoon," he offered, and saw the relief cross his friend's face.

"Thanks, Mark," said the woman, gratefully.

"Sure," he grinned. "Why don't you hang out here, and I'll see what I can do, all right?" Kris nodded, and the man left the room to make his calls, leaving Kris and Ryanne to entertain themselves in his office.

"Ryanne?" Kris asked, after a while of silence.

"Hm?" asked the blonde, absentmindedly rubbing Kris' shoulder.

"I just… I just wanted to say I'm really sorry for hurting you," murmured the soldier. "I never meant to, honest. And Cassidy, too."

Ryanne sighed. "Sweetheart, you've already apologized, and been forgiven," she pointed out, patiently. "I know you feel bad, and I know you didn't want to hurt me or Cassidy. But, you have to let it go, Kris," she said. "You can't keep kicking yourself for this - it's over and done with, and we've moved on."

Kris agreed, and then pulled Ryanne closer, gently pressing her head against the blonde's taut stomach, as careful fingers ran through her midnight hair.

"Are you nervous, honey?" questioned Ryanne, and Kris nodded. "I'll be right beside you, okay? I promise," she added, and Kris pulled back a little to look up at her.

"Thank you," she said, honestly, and Ryanne kissed her forehead, before Mark cleared his throat, announcing his presence.

"Looks like you have an appointment at his office in Houston in a little over an hour, at 11:30. Is that okay?" he asked, and both women nodded.

"Thanks again, Mark," smiled Ryanne, and the man returned the grin, before giving them both a hug, and wishing them the best of luck as they walked out the door. Calling them back to make them promise they'd call him with the latest information of what was going on, he finally let them go, and Ryanne took the keys from Kris, choosing to drive to Houston herself.

"I can drive, you know," said the soldier, sullenly climbing into the passenger side of her truck.

"Oh, I know you can," smiled Ryanne. "I just want you to try and get some rest, okay?" Shrugging, Kris was about to protest that she didn't need to rest, when a yawn sneaked up on her, and a fair eyebrow was raised from the woman across from her.

"Not a word," warned Kris, and the blonde hid her smile as she started the engine.

Ten minutes into the forty-minute drive, Kris was asleep with her head against the window, and Ryanne grinned. It was about time the soldier got some well deserved rest. Unfortunately, it didn't last very long, and the tall woman awoke with a start.

Ryanne reached over and squeezed her hand. "Everything okay?" she asked, softly.

Kris shook her head, and found her throat too dry to swallow, taking a sip from the small blonde's cup of water she had along with her. When she could feel Ryanne's green eyes boring a hole into her, she sighed.

"I had the nightmare again, and I know it was about the war, but that's it," she said, and Ryanne gave her hand a gentle squeeze as she pulled into the parking lot.

"Ryanne?" called the soldier, as they stepped out of the truck and began walking towards the building.

"What?"

"Thank you for being here with me," replied Kris, softly, revealing only to Ryanne just how scared she felt.

"Where you go, I go," responded the blonde, giving her soldier a quick hug before entering the office building of one Dr. Carl Haggis, and his partner, with a long name Kris didn't even want to attempt to pronounce.

The secretary told them to sign in, and that they could fill out a few papers to pass the expected ten minute wait. With Kris' help, Ryanne finished the forms, and returned them to the woman's desk just as she told them the doctor was ready for them.

"Is Ms. Jones the only patient?" the secretary questioned, and Ryanne nodded. "Then she's the only one I need in with the doctor."

"You don't understand," said Kris, placing her hand on Ryanne's shoulder. "Either she goes with me, or I don't go."

"It's all right, Helen," called a deep voice from just behind the door marked with the number one. "Let them both in." With a sigh, Helen opened the door for the two women, and then walked back to her desk to finish her work.

"Hi," greeted Carl, standing up to his full height of nearly 6'0'', coming even with Kris as he shook her hand, as well as Ryanne's. "You must be Kris and Ryanne; Mark told me you seemed to be having a little trouble sleeping," said Dr. Haggis, and Kris nodded, sitting down across from the man, as Ryanne sat next to her, and the doctor began his initial examination, to see what needed to be done.

"I think hypnosis is the best road," he said, after almost three quarters of an hour of questions and suggestibility tests. "You seem to be a good patient for it, and I'd like to see if could help you recall that nightmare, which I'd be willing to bet is just a memory. When did you say you started having nightmares?"

"Just a few weeks ago, when I returned from my trip to Texas," responded the soldier, feeling a little uptight still, but the nervousness had lessened in the past hour. Both because the doctor was kind and patient, and because he didn't seem to mind the supportive grip Ryanne had taken with her hand.

"Okay, let's begin…" said the man, and gently asked Ryanne to move to a separate chair, as he began his work on the tall woman in front of him.

"I want you to listen only to the sound of my voice," he said, evenly, when the woman was hypnotized a few minutes later. "When I ask you a question, I want you to answer me to the best of your ability, do you understand?"

"Yes," replied the woman.

"What is your name?" he asked first, to make sure she would answer him.

"Kris Jones."

He was constantly writing in his legal pad of paper as he spoke. "And what do you do?"

"I'm a soldier with the United States Army," was her reply.

"What rank?"

"Staff Sergeant."

Now it was time to get down to business. "Kris, I want you to think back to your time in Texas, just a few weeks ago," said Dr. Haggis. "Do you remember?"

"Yes," said the woman.

"Good. Listen only to my voice, Kris. Now, I want you to remember what you did there. Did you talk to anyone?"

"Yes."

"Who?"

"Henry Gregg."

Dr. Haggis made a note on his writing tablet as he spoke. "And who is Henry Gregg to you, Kris?" he asked.

"A soldier who was under my command after his commanding officer died," said Kris, evenly, thinking of the young man she'd come to know.

"What did you two talk about?"

"The war," was the simple answer.

"Did Henry ever say anything during your time in Texas that upset you?"

"Yes, once," replied the soldier.

"What did he say?" questioned Carl, keeping his deep voice even and smooth. He was used to asking simple questions, and, little by little, getting to the information he wanted. It was part of his job.

The woman clearly became agitated as she thought about it. "He asked me if I remembered… no, I didn't!" she cried.

"Just relax, Kris," said the man, soothingly. "It's all right, you're okay. Nothing bad will happen when you tell me what Henry said. It'll be okay. What did he tell you?"

"He asked me if I remembered the time we secured the abandoned building that the Vietnamese soldiers used for supplies," she recited.

"Good," said Carl, gently. "Now, I want you to remember farther back, before your time in Texas with Henry. I want you to remember your service in the war. Do you remember?"

"Yes."

"Think back to when you secured the abandoned building the Vietnamese soldiers used for supplies," he said, quoting the woman, making sure he wasn't suggesting any memories to the woman that didn't exist, as sometimes happened if the hypnotist asked leading questions.

"I remember," said the woman, swallowing hard.

"I want you to tell me exactly what you did to secure the building."

Kris sighed, and began her tale…

"We approached the building in formation," she said. "I went a few feet, and then motioned the guys ahead of me, and they moved forward in groups, like they'd been taught."

"Was it day or night?" Carl interrupted.

"Night."

The man continued writing. "Okay, continue," he prompted.

"We wore our night vision gear, and there was a little moonlight, but it was still hard to see very clearly. I entered the first room, and it was empty, so the guys filed in, and then lined up against the sides so I could go through," said Kris, the tensing of her jaw telling Ryanne she wasn't comfortable with the upcoming events to be told.

"I turned into the next room, with my rifle ready, as always. But this time, there was someone in the room with me," she said, her voice beginning to break. "I couldn't tell who it was, but I saw the person raise a gun at me, so I fired. The guys came in and secured the rest of the building, and when they came back, they walked with me to see who had threatened to shoot me," she said.

"Parker put his light on the body, and…" the soldier swallowed, hard, and clenched her hands into fists.

"Just take it easy, Kris," said Dr. Haggis, gently. "It's okay; you can tell me."

"She was barefoot, with dark pants on. She had a gun in one hand, and a stuffed animal in the other. The shot I fired left a gaping hole in her chest, and she was almost dead. Gregg said the strange words she was muttering was some kind of prayer.

"I… I looked at her face, and… she was only a kid," said the woman, a tear making its way down her cheek. "She couldn't have been eight years old yet, and I watched her take her last breath, and die."

Seeing the tall woman in distress, Carl said, "All right, Kris. It's okay, now. When I count to three, you will awaken. One, two, three."

Blue eyes flew open, and Kris wiped at her face, glancing at the doctor and then over at Ryanne. Upon seeing the look on Ryanne's face, the tall soldier felt a rush of guilt as the memories of what she had done flooded her mind. With a strangled cry, she rushed from the office, slamming the door behind her.

* * * * *

Ryanne fought the urge to follow her, but decided to stay and listen to what the doctor had to say.

"That's horrible," she whispered.

Carl agreed. "I can see why it would affect her so," he nodded.

"But, that would be the cause of her nightmares. What's wrong with her; the mood swings, the constant sleeplessness…?" questioned the blonde, hurting for her soldier.

"I'd say she suffers from an acute case of PTSD, or post-traumatic-stress-disorder. By definition, PTSD needs to last at least a month, or it's just acute stress disorder," the man sighed. "However, since she's been suffering night terrors, which include flashbacks, and aggressive behavior, I think it's more than just stress.

"I'm going to prescribe a light sedative to help her sleep," he continued, "as well as a few counseling sessions. Try to help her maintain a positive attitude, and that will help as well. I think we're done here; thank you for coming," he said, handing Ryanne the slip of paper with the prescription, and standing as she walked to the door.

"Thank you, doctor," said the blonde, before hurrying out the door to search for the tall soldier.

* * * * *

Ryanne found the woman she was looking for; Kris was in a small side room, sitting in a wooden chair, facing the window, her back to the door. The blonde could almost feel the intensity of the soldier's heartache as it poured off of her in waves.

"Kris," spoke Ryanne, softly.

"What are you doing here?" asked Kris, her voice void of all emotion.

"I came to see if you were okay," said Ryanne, gently.

"Why do you care?"

Ryanne frowned. "What do you mean, why do I care? I love you, Kris. What kind of question is that?" she asked.

The soldier was quiet for a while, before asking, "How can you love me, after what I did?"

The blonde sighed. "Honey, no matter what you did, I could never stop loving you," she began, and had more to say, but the tall woman cut her off.

"Don't you get it?" demanded Kris, turning to face the small blonde, tears in her blue eyes, shimmering like crystal and falling like the Niagara. "I killed a little girl! She was the same age as Cassidy, and had a goddamned stuffed animal in her hand. I turned around, and she was there. I didn't even think, I just reacted, and I put a hole in her chest. She died because of me."

"Kris, she had a gun," said Ryanne. "You did what you had to, to save your life."

"But what if it had been Cassidy? God knows I'm a trained soldier - what if I do worse than I have already?"

The blonde tried to soothe the frantic woman. "I think now that we've gotten everything out, you'll be more like your old self," said Ryanne. "Besides, those were severe circumstances."

The tall soldier was silent for a moment. "The gun wasn't even loaded," she said, at last.

"What?" gasped Ryanne.

"I checked, after the guys filed out. The chamber was full of fucking blanks, Ryanne," spat Kris, upset. "I fired on a decoy. They sent her there, knowing full well she was going to die, and I pulled the goddamn trigger."

It was just some sick mind game, and I fell for it, she thought, sadly.

Watching the woman lose her composure, as Kris ran a shaky hand through her long hair, Ryanne said, "You know, I believe you were thinking about Cassidy when you fired that shot." Kris looked up, meeting Ryanne's eyes, the look of terror written all over her face. "You were thinking about whether or not you wanted to come home to her.

"Kris, you're the kind of person who doesn't let anything get in your way - you wouldn't let anyone keep you from coming home, from seeing Cassidy again. I think, deep down, you knew that this child was a potential threat to that, and you reacted like anyone in your place would have," concluded Ryanne.

"It doesn't change what I did."

Ryanne sighed. "No, it doesn't," she confirmed. "But, Kris, it was war; even you know you don't have much control over who lives and dies."

"Damn it, I should have thought about what I was doing!" the woman cried. "If I'd have just looked closer, maybe I would have seen she was a kid, or I could have shot to injure…"

"And what if she didn't have blanks, Kris?" questioned Ryanne. "What if she'd had real bullets, and you hadn't pulled that trigger right away? You'd be dead right now, because there's no way she would have hesitated to shoot you."

The soldier nodded. "Maybe it would've been better that way," she muttered, but Ryanne caught it.

"What do you mean?"

Kris sighed. "If I'd have died back there, that little girl would still be alive, we wouldn't have fought, I wouldn't have hit you, and… and I wouldn't have hurt Cassidy," she finished, quietly.

"Is that what this is all about, Kris?" Taking a place beside the tall soldier, Ryanne turned the bronzed face so blue eyes met green. "Sweetheart, if you would have died back there, I'll bet half of the guys who made it wouldn't have. I know for a fact Jenkins and Gregg would have died if it weren't for you.

"As for us here at home… Kris, last Christmas, Cassidy stopped wearing your Army jacket. We were both very upset that you had left us, after you promised to come home. And, had you not been keeping your nightmare from me, I don't think the fighting or the hitting would have happened," said Ryanne.

"But, the point is," she concluded, "without you, I wouldn't be here; not like I am. You're a part of me, Kris, and I love you with all my heart and soul. What I felt when I heard you had died… I don't know how long I would have lasted, had that feeling turned out to be permanent," she admitted, softly. "Don't ever, ever, say it would have been better if you'd actually died, because in losing you, I felt my heart die."

Kris was silent for a minute, absorbing what she had just been told.

"You really mean that?" she asked, after a while of silence.

"Yes."

"So you don't hate me for what I did?" was her next question, spoken so low Ryanne wasn't sure the woman had said anything.

Ryanne instantly put her arms around the tall soldier, pulling her into a strong hug, as she whispered fiercely, "No, sweetheart, not at all."

"I do." Kris cried into the blonde's shoulder as the woman lovingly held her tight, before Ryanne kissed her forehead, and suggested they go home. Kris readily agreed, and the two walked out hand in hand, paying no attention to the strange looks they received. Stopping at the drugstore to pick up the prescriptions, Ryanne drove home, as Kris tried hard not to fall asleep in the truck.

* * * * *

As the weeks passed, Kris began sleeping longer and more peacefully, and her temper greatly improved as a result. The night terrors toned down into nightmares, which frightened her, but weren't bad enough to wake her up. Cassidy helped keep her mind off the bad memories by asking for the soldier's help with her homework, which included writing book reports and working on multiplication.

Finally, after nearly four weeks, Kris decided she was feeling well enough and stable enough with her emotions to go back to work. Calling Mark to tell him she'd be back in on Monday, which also happened to be her birthday, the tall woman spent the entire weekend with Cassidy and Ryanne. The three spent the days going from movie theater to movie theater, park to park, and yard sale to yard sale until they were pleasantly exhausted.

"You never did tell me what you wanted for your birthday," said Ryanne, as she rested her head on Kris' shoulder, as the tall woman lay in bed.

"That's because I don't want you to get me anything, honey," smiled the soldier. "I've got all I need right here. I love you," she said, and kissed the blonde, softly.

Ryanne grinned. "I love you, too, Kris, but you're not off the hook that easy," she replied, and Kris growled. "Come on, there's got to be something I can get you." Little did the tall soldier realize Ryanne had done her gift shopping early, but the blonde decided she would still give the woman a hard time for not giving her a solid answer for the past two weeks.

Kris pretended to think about it for a minute, before shaking her head. "Nope, not a thing," she said, and Ryanne glared at her.

"You're a pain, do you know that?"

The soldier grinned. "Yeah, but I'm your pain," she replied.

"And don't you forget it," smiled the blonde, before kissing her gently and curling up into her arms for the night.

* * * * *

Kris was awakened the next morning by a small bundle of energy jumping on the bed.

"Cassidy, don't wake your mother," she warned, and the girl calmed a little, but wrapped her arms around the soldier's neck in a fierce hug.

"Happy birthday, Momma," she whispered.

"Thanks, baby," Kris grinned, lifting the child from the bed, and setting her on the floor, before following suit, after disentangling herself from Ryanne, who had somehow managed to throw an arm and leg over top of her.

"Let me get dressed, and I'll drive you to school this morning, all right?"

The girl smiled. "Promise?" she asked, excitedly.

The tall woman grinned. "Sure," she said, and ruffled the blonde hair as the girl skirted from the room to get dressed herself. Pulling her nightshirt over her head, she jumped in the shower, and was drying herself with a towel ten minutes later, when the bathroom light was suddenly shut off.

"Hey!…" she exclaimed, which trailed off when she felt soft hands encircle her bare waist.

"Morning," mumbled Ryanne, kissing from the exposed neck across to a naked shoulder. "Happy birthday, sweetheart."

Kris smiled. "Thanks," she said. "You know, if this is the greeting I get, I think I'll get a year older every day." Ryanne chuckled and proceeded to remove Kris' towel, when the soldier reluctantly stopped her.

"As much as I'd love to wake up like this, I promised Cassidy I'd take her to school this morning, before I go to the base," she explained, and Ryanne gently kissed her lips.

"Okay," she sighed. "I'll probably come up and see you later today, all right?"

"I'm counting on it," said the tall woman, drying her hair. "I'm supposed to start off with a new group of grunts today, and the Captain says it's a large group of all men, so it should be fun. Wish me luck," she chuckled.

"Good luck, honey," said the blonde, kissing her again. "Have a good day, and I'll see you later." Dressing quickly, Kris deposited a soft kiss on the small woman's lips before calling to Cassidy, and hurrying out the door with the elated youngster.

"Are you really gonna drop me off in your camouflage suit?" asked Cassidy, happily bouncing in the passenger seat of Kris' large truck.

"If that's okay," she grinned, and the girl squealed.

"Just wait until Nathan sees!"

A dark eyebrow raised, curiously. "And just who is Nathan?" questioned Kris, and Cassidy smiled.

"Nathan's my boyfriend," she declared, proudly. "He told me Friday he likes me, and we play on the playground together." Kris chuckled to herself, as the girl rapidly fired out facts about the young boy she was apparently sprung on.

"Momma, liking a boy is okay, right?" she asked, suddenly, and Kris gave her daughter a concerned glance.

"Of course, sweetheart; why wouldn't it be?"

The girl sighed. "Well, I mean, you like my mother, but you're not a guy," she pointed out.

Kris bit her lip. Oh, boy, she thought, suddenly wishing Ryanne was there to help her with the sensitive talks. "Cassidy, it doesn't matter if the person you like is a boy or a girl, and it doesn't matter if you happen to be a boy or a girl., either. There are boys who like boys, boys who like girls, and girls who like girls," she explained. "There's nothing wrong with any of it."

"So, if a boy likes a boy and a girl likes a girl, that means they're gay, right?"

The soldier began wishing harder. "Yes," she affirmed.

Cassidy was quiet for a minute. "Then why do kids in my school say gay like it's a bad thing, if it's not?" she asked.

Kris sighed. "There are some people who think that it's only right for a man to love a woman, and anything else is wrong," she admitted. "That's called being prejudiced, and that's not a good thing. Those are the people who say that your mother and I shouldn't be together, because we're both women.

"But, the point is, Cassidy, that it doesn't matter who you like or even love, just so long as you're happy," the woman concluded. "Remember that, and don't let anyone tell you different, okay?"

Cassidy smiled, and Kris felt that perhaps she'd said something right. "Okay," the girl agreed, and happily drug Kris out of her truck by the hand, leading her into the elementary school until Nathan was found. After a few minutes of introductions, Kris began to feel like some kind of caged zoo animal to be poked and prodded, and told Cassidy she had to leave.

Waving good-bye to more than a dozen grade-school kids, Kris left a very happy Cassidy in her wake, as she drove on to the base to meet her new recruits.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Kris sighed. Her new group of forty men looked good, and seemed to have no trouble obeying her orders. Still, it was a hell of a way to spend her birthday. She'd much rather be at home, cuddled close to Rainne, but the soldier knew she'd done enough relaxing for a while. Although she still had a few sick days left, she needed to work.

A sharp, "Ma'am!" interrupted her intended command, and she turned to see a private standing behind her.

"What is it, Private… Adams?"

"Ma'am, Captain Bowman requests your presence in the mess hall immediately," he related, standing at attention as he spoke to his superior officer.

Kris frowned. "The mess hall?" she asked.

"Yes, ma'am. And he said your men were to remain in their quarters until your order otherwise." Adams added.

"All right," she agreed, turning to face her recruits, who were still standing obediently at attention, not even glancing at her during her conversation. "Platoon, fall out to your barracks! Wait for my orders."

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am!" they replied, filing out as they were told, going their separate ways, as Kris followed Private Adams and tried to figure out what Captain Bowman was doing in the commissary.

Opening the double doors, she took a startled step back when more than two dozen voices shouted, "Surprise!" Raising an eyebrow at the scene, Kris' blue eyes scanned the crowd, seeing many of her close friends like Parker, Jenkins, Winston, and even Henry Gregg. Her gaze resting on two grinning blondes, she was unable to stop the smile that spread across her face.

"Momma!" cried Cassidy, running and jumping into Kris' arms, the soldier catching the girl with ease. "I helped bake the cake!"

"You did, huh?" The girl nodded, and Kris lifted her into the air, as Cassidy laughed with delight. Upon seeing the rather large cake, Kris smiled. The pastry was covered in thick vanilla icing, the intricate flowers telling the soldier that Ryanne had a hidden talent for decorating, and two candles on top.

Here she groaned, and glanced at Ryanne, who was standing on her right. "It was your idea for the candles, wasn't it?" Ryanne only grinned, as a 3 and ? adorned the cake, to the amusement of everyone.

"And the party," added the blonde, earning her a bright smile and a quick kiss from her soldier.

"Thank you. What are you doing out of school, sweetheart?" she asked Cassidy, still in her arms.

"Mother said I could come to your party if I did good on my math test," she explained. "I got an A!"

"Hey, all right!" exclaimed Kris. "I'm proud of you, pip-squeak."

Tired of all the talk, Parker handed the tall woman the gift he'd brought. He was glad Ryanne had spoken to him several weeks before about the party, so he'd had time to look for a present.

"Open it," he urged, and Kris set Cassidy on the floor, taking the box from him. Taking her time as she gingerly unwrapped the gift, she caught the glare Parker was giving her, and laughed as she tore off the paper, tossing it in his direction. Removing a white T-shirt from the box, she raised a dark eyebrow at the soldier.

Printed on the shirt, in large black letters, were the words: "Yes dear."

"Figured you could use it, and it might help Ryanne out, too," he explained, dodging the playful shove that was aimed at his chest.

"Thanks, Tim," she said, grinning, and the man nodded. Going through the rest of the gifts, Kris laughed at most of them, although a few weren't meant to be humorous. One was Henry Gregg's present - a beautifully hand-crafted statue of two soldiers dressed in the combat uniform, one appearing to lift the other under the arms, pain evident on the soldier's face. Below, on the oak stand, the words "A soldier never leaves a man behind" were inscribed.

Blue eyes met blue. Kris held her hand out, pulling the boy into a strong hug when he took it, and whispered, "Thank you." The soldier nodded, and smiled as he motioned for her to move on to her other gifts. He'd flown out early that morning, and had a flight back home in a few hours, but was glad Ryanne had invited him to the party - it was great to his commanding officer doing so well.

"Here, Momma!" said Cassidy, eagerly handing the tall woman a square box, wrapped in newspaper. Upon opening the package, Kris found a white coffee mug, with a picture of a Palomino worthy of being Wind Dancer's twin. "When you fill it up with coffee, another horse appears!"

The soldier grinned. "Thanks, Cassidy," she said, giving the girl a strong hug. "I love it. I'll use it every morning from now on, okay?" With a big smile reaching from ear-to-ear, the child nodded, thrilled to no end that she'd picked out the right present.

Rainne gave her an envelope; her last gift. "And this is from me," she said, and Kris took it with an expectant smirk. Pulling out a piece of paper, she frowned slightly, and read the letter silently to herself.

Kris,

Sorry, your gift's not in here. You'll have to go to the Robin's Egg Diner at 5:00 tonight to get it. Tell the woman at the front desk who you are - she'll show you where to find me.

Happy birthday, honey!

All my love,

Ryanne

"All right…" drawled the soldier, placing a soft kiss on the top of the woman's head. "Should I be worried?"

Ryanne grinned. "Yes," she replied, to Kris' surprise, and the tall soldier chuckled. "Now, go mingle. I know you haven't talked to some of these guys in a while." Smiling, with one last kiss, Kris did as she was told.

Spending nearly half an hour speaking with everyone in attendance, she thanked them all for coming, and shook everyone's hand as they left. Cassidy giggled when the tall soldier took her hand, as well as Ryanne's, acting very official before, when everyone else had left, sweeping them both into a strong hug.

"Thank you both," she said, kissing the females on the top of their heads. "This has been a great birthday."

"And it's not over yet," winked Ryanne, and Kris grinned, raising an eyebrow at her. "I'll drive Cassidy home, and get ready. You don't really need to change, unless you want to," she added, and Kris took one look at her current camouflage outfit, and decided she wound indeed change clothes.

"I'll at least take a shower," she shrugged. "I'm sure I smell."

Ryanne smiled. "Well, I wasn't going to say anything, but…" She laughed as Kris growled, and chased her around the mess hall before capturing her in a fierce bear hug, and tickling her mercilessly.

"Okay, I give!" she cried, and Kris chuckled as she released her hold, and allowed the woman to walk towards the door, Cassidy in tow. "Oh, Kris?" she called, just as she reached the door, and the soldier turned from her place a few yards away.

"Hm?" The soldier was on her way back to her quarters to take a shower, since she assumed Ryanne wanted to change alone, as the dinner seemed secretive, and she wasn't about to spoil the surprise - for herself, or the blonde.

Green eyes sparkled playfully, as the woman stuck her tongue out at her, and replied, "You smell." Kris gave her a mock scowl, as Cassidy laughed, and the two blondes made their way to the parking lot, leaving a chuckling Staff Sergeant behind.

* * * * *

Kris Jones took a deep breath as she stepped out of her truck, and prepared to enter the world of fine dining. It had been a long time since she'd been in a nice place like the Robin's Egg, and although she was wearing her nicest pair of dark navy blue jeans, a crisp white shirt, and a dressy jacket, she felt strange. She didn't want to wear a skirt or dress, because not only was it just not her, she had no idea what Ryanne had in mind.

Reaching back to ensure the gem encrusted clip that held a portion of her hair back away from her face was still in place, the tall soldier opened the door, and walked up to the front desk. The lobby are was rather large, and several people waited on cushioned benches for their table to be ready, but Kris paid them no mind - the woman behind the counter was who she was supposed to speak with.

"Good evening, can I help you?" greeted the brunette, who was trying to juggle ringing phones, questioning customers, and busy waiters and waitresses.

"I need to see Ryanne Cole, and I was told you'd be the one who would help me," she explained, and the woman nodded.

"That's right. You must be Kris Jones," she said, and the tall woman nodded. "Look, as you can see, I'm a little busy right now, but I'll have John here show you where to go." Motioning to a passing waiter, she whispered in his ear, and pointed to the far end of the restaurant. The blonde man named John nodded, and gestured to Kris that she was to follow him.

The people still waiting in the lobby gave Kris a hard look as she walked past numerous tables, the woman wondering if John knew where he was going. Finally, he stopped in front of a pair of double doors, which led to a large conference room. Leaving her to herself, Kris decided this was where she was supposed to be, and slowly opened one of the large oak doors.

Her jaw nearly hit the ground at the sight that was revealed to her. Various candles had been lit around the room, bathing the room in a soft and gentle glow. All but two chairs had been moved to the back, and those two seats were positioned across from each other at one end of the table, plates of food and wine glasses in front of them. Two more candles were on the table itself, complete with a single red rose in a vase, and somewhere, Kris' mind vaguely acknowledged, a soft country love song could be heard playing into the stillness.

But what really drew the soldier's attention was the small figure, standing just off to the side, watching her intently. Ryanne had obviously gone all out for the event - and not just in candles. The blonde wore a smooth green dress, strapless, that went down to the middle of her thigh. Her earrings were a lighter color than her eyes, almost a clear emerald, but she donned a dark stone on a chain, that rested just above the cleave of her breasts.

It took Kris a while to speak. As it was, she was able to move before she found her voice, and walked over to where Ryanne stood, placing her hands gently on the blonde's shoulders.

"You're beautiful," were the first words out of her mouth, and watched the green eyes she loved light up with delight. "And this place is amazing. Thank you, honey."

Ryanne's smile made the candles pale in comparison, as she replied, "I'm glad you like it. But, you don't look so bad yourself, you know. I like this coat; it looks good on you." Running her hands down said jacket's collar, she came to a stop at the button that fastened the coat together, and leaned forward onto her tiptoes to kiss the soldier, softly.

"Happy birthday. Or did I tell you that already?" Kris chuckled, and led her to the table, making the blonde woman smile by pulling her chair out for her. As she found her own chair, the woman was surprised to find an envelope on the seat. Picking it up as she sat down, she opened it, and read the letter within:

Sweetheart,

I know you told me that I didn't have to get you anything for your birthday, but you know me - since when do I listen?

Here Kris smiled, and glanced up at the blonde, sparing her a quick wink, before going back to her reading..

After all, by the time you told me you didn't need a gift, I'd already finished everything, so you were in for it, anyway.

I know that, even though we try, our times alone are scarce, and I also know how much just being together means to you - I'm kind of partial to it, myself. So, on that note, this whole evening is yours, to be spent as you like. No one will bother us in this room; we have it for the whole evening should you so choose, but enclosed you will find tickets to a night out on Lake Needles; just you, me, the peaceful night, and the canoe.

I know this isn't enough, but I hope you enjoy it, and the only other thing I can offer you is my love - always and forever.

I love you.

Ryanne

Kris looked up from the letter with tears in her eyes. What had she ever done to deserve such a woman in her life? She didn't know, and didn't particularly care, just so long as she kept doing it.

"Ryanne, honey, this is more than enough," she said, honestly. "No one has ever done anything like this for me, much less spent this much time and effort paying attention to what I need. And if you could give me nothing else, but your love, I would still be the luckiest damn woman on the face of this earth."

With that, Kris proceeded to sample the dinner in front of her, and found everything to be delicious. The steak was tender, the mashed potatoes thick and creamy, the vegetable fresh, and, best yet, everything that was supposed to be warm, was.

Suddenly, as her watch beeped, signaling six o'clock, the soldier asked, "Where's Cassidy?" Not that the girl wasn't responsible enough and old enough to be home by herself, the woman just worried about her - she couldn't help it.

Ryanne smiled. "Barry's staying with her," she assured. "He offered when I told him what I had planned, and he said he could even stay the night, if need be." Kris' eyebrow went to her hairline at this possibility, and she grinned.

Since they were finished eating, Kris got to her feet, and, upon hearing one of her favorite songs, asked the small woman to dance. As the women stood in each other's embrace, moving softly with the music, the tall soldier knew she'd never feel the same way about anyone ever again. Nor did she want to.

She loved Ryanne more than she thought was possible, more than she'd ever loved anything in her whole life. Cassidy ran a close second, of course, but it was a different kind of love - one that could never be equaled in its own respect. But standing there, holding the blonde in her arms as they danced, Kris knew nothing ever had, or ever would, make her feel so right, so good, so… whole.

"Hey," smiled Ryanne, gently, looking up at her. "Where'd you go?"

Kris just grinned, and kissed her on the nose. "Nowhere," she replied. "I was just thinking. About you," she added, before the woman could ask.

"Ah, I see. Good thoughts, I hope."

The soldier looked at her like she was crazy. "Of course," she responded. "What other kind of thoughts do you think I have about you?"

The blonde shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe how you're going to pay me back," she hinted, and paused, when Kris held up her hand.

"Shh," the soldier urged, cocking her head up towards the ceiling. "It's raining," she deduced, to Ryanne's dismay. "I'm afraid we'll have to postpone that canoe trip, sweetheart." Seeing the woman's crestfallen expression, Kris was quick to say, "But, since you said no one will bother us, I'd rather just stay back here with you, anyway. I don't feel like sharing you with the rest of the world for a while."

Ryanne brightened, and stopped dancing long enough to press her mouth against the soldier's in a passionate kiss.

"That'd better be a long while," she stated, putting her arms around Kris' neck, pulling her down for another long kiss, this time not letting the woman go until she had to pull back for air.

"I love you, Ryanne," swore Kris, looking deeply into soft jade orbs, and seeing a love as strong as her own reflected therein.

There was no hesitation. "I love you, too. You know what?" she questioned.

"What?"

"I'm glad you showered," sighed Ryanne, as she dropped her head on Kris' shoulder, and breathed the scent that was pure soldier. Kris growled at her, but couldn't keep up the facade, and soon broke into a smile, which widened as she heard Ryanne laugh under her sudden tickle attack.

"Okay, I give!" she cried, and Kris stopped, pulling her into a tight hug as the woman caught her breath. "You know, I hate that you're not ticklish."

Kris grinned. "I know," she said. "But that's what makes tickling you so much fun - I just get to watch you squirm, and you can't do a thing about it."

A fair eyebrow was raised. "Oh, really?" questioned Ryanne, and Kris felt her heart skip a beat. "You," a feather-light kiss to the neck, "don't think," kiss, "I have," kiss, kiss, "any way of," a tiny bite, "paying you back?"

The tall soldier turned into a pile of mush. "Point taken," she said, weakly, and Ryanne smiled, kissing the soft flesh once more for emphasis.

"So, are you gonna challenge me again?" the blonde asked, proudly.

"Oh, yeah…" drawled the woman, leaning down to kiss a bare shoulder. "If for no other reason than I love losing to you."

"Kris," warned the blonde, "don't start something you can't finish."

A playful, "Who said I wasn't gonna finish it?" could be heard, as the soldier moved her kisses to the hollow of the woman's throat.

Ryanne held back a gasp as the caresses were continued over her collarbone. "We're in public, honey," she protested, her resolve weakening.

The soldier pouted as she reluctantly pulled back. "But I wanted to give the people out there something to talk about," she said, and the blonde laughed, however a little disappointed.

"Come on, tiger," she grinned, taking the woman's hand after the candles had been blown out, and both women had had their fill of gentle kisses for a while. "Let's go home, okay?" Kris eagerly agreed, and held the door open for the blonde, walking her out to the parking lot with all the air of a royal guest, even going so far as to bow slightly when she opened the passenger door for her.

"Why, thank you," smiled Ryanne.

"You're welcome," returned Kris, climbing in beside her, turning on her windshield wipers as soon as she started the vehicle. The rain was pouring down steadily now, as it had been for the past hour or so, and the soldier found the visibility to be poor. Turning on her lights, she pulled out of the parking lot, and headed for home.

* * * * *

Another bolt of lightning made its way across the sky, and Kris looked over at Ryanne, who was trying hard not to cower in her seat.

"Hey, are you okay?" the soldier asked, reaching over and taking the small blonde's hand.

Ryanne nodded, and Kris squinted as a car with their high beams on nearly blinded her. Suddenly, with green eyes wide, Ryanne yelled, "Kris, he's in our lane!"

The tall woman swerved to the right to avoid a head on collision on the two-lane road across the bridge, and winced as the large Buick impacted her truck just behind the driver's side door. The driver of the Buick didn't stop, and the tires on Kris' truck did nothing to stop their spin on the slick pavement.

Before she had a chance to try and stop what she knew was coming, the soldier had the sensation of flying, as the car pushed her truck through the guard rail and over the edge of the overpass. The force as they hit the surface of the water was the same as slamming into a rock, and jarred the soldier's entire body.

Gathering her wits, Kris' first thought was of Ryanne. Looking over, she saw the frightened woman scrambling to undo her seat belt to escape the icy water that was lapping around her ankles.

"Are you hurt?" asked Kris, throwing off her own safety belt. When Ryanne shook her head, Kris said, "Stay there, Ryanne. I'll come around and get you, all right? Don't move."

"Be careful," urged the blonde, and Kris nodded as she used all her weight to open the door of her slowly sinking vehicle.

"Oh, shit! That's cold!" she exclaimed, grabbing on to the frame as she climbed along the tailgate - what was above water. Continuing over to Ryanne's side, the women worked together to pry open the door, Ryanne gasping when the cold water rose from her waist to her neck in a flash.

"Take my hand," Kris instructed, determined not to become separated in the raging flood.

"Kris, the truck…"

"Come on," she said, kicking hard to stay above the surface, "we can't stay here - it'll sink." Just to be safe, she wrapped her arm around Ryanne's waist, pulling her along as she let the current move them swiftly down the angry river.

Looking around, she quickly formed an idea. "This way," she suggested, and began trying to swim to the side of the mountainous cliffs that enclosed the nature-made river. "Keep swimming, honey - trust me. There's a cave up here to the right. Keep you head up!" she encouraged, fiercely, as the smaller woman quickly began to tire against the strength of the current.

The river was powerful, and Kris was having trouble making sure Ryanne was okay. She wasn't as concerned with herself, knowing she had a good chance of holding her breath longer, should she be taken under, but her fear was for the woman she loved.

Now the shelter was in sight. Having played on the river when she was young, Kris knew the cave well, and put her all into reaching it. With one final kick, she realized with alarm that while the current would allow her entrance, the force would knock her into the wall.

Turning at the last possible moment, struggling against the Herculean flow, she grimaced as she took the blow with her back, sparing Ryanne but nearly dislocating her shoulder.

"Get up on that rock," she told Ryanne, helping the woman onto the large rock that was, as of yet, safe from the rising water.

"You, too," said Ryanne, but Kris shook her head.

"I'm all right," she said. "You just stay dry."

"It's cold," said the blonde, curling up into a ball in an attempt to warm up, while trying not to let her teeth chatter.

"Yeah," agreed Kris, adjusting her position so only her legs were in the water, still leaving Ryanne room on the protruding stone to stay out of the water. Which was rising. But Kris wouldn't say anything unless she had to.

"How you doing up there?" she asked, after a rather long period of silence. "Ryanne, sweetheart, keep talking to me, all right?"

"I'm just c-cold," stuttered the blonde, as the tall soldier took the smaller hands in her own, and gently blew warm air on the digits.

Kris raised an eyebrow as she questioned, "Hey, you remember what happened the last time you nearly got hypothermia?" The slight blush and small smile was enough to tell Kris she did.

Suddenly, Kris started laughing, and it was Ryanne's turn to raise her eyebrow at the soldier. "W-what's so funny?" she asked.

"Do you have any idea what I was thinking about when you walked into that shower?" Ryanne shook her head. "I was wondering if I'd get in trouble if I got in there with you."

Ryanne was surprised. "You wanted to take a shower with me?" Kris nodded, sheepishly. "Why?"

The soldier swallowed her slight embarrassment, deciding she'd answer honestly, if only to keep Ryanne awake, knowing how much the exertion of swimming had taken out of the small woman. "Because I wanted you," she admitted. "I knew I loved you, I guess I just wanted to show you. I mean, you're beautiful, smart, caring… how could I not?"

Ryanne smiled. "Thank you," she said. She was feeling a little better, but still cold, although her teeth weren't chattering as bad anymore.

Kris decided that while she wasn't one for girl talk, she'd rather trouble herself with expressing her feelings than lose Ryanne. She was about to resign herself to the talk, when she noticed the water was steadily rising, and now soaked her waist.

"Move back," she said, and Ryanne crawled further back into the cave, as Kris pulled herself up.

"But how will they find us back here?" asked the blonde, as Kris moved along side her, and wrapped her strong arms around her freezing frame. If the soldier thought she was cold, in pants and a jacket, however soaked she was, she knew Ryanne had to be worse off in just a dress, her high-heeled shoes having slipped off in the swim.

"I'll get us out of this," said Kris, kissing the top of the blonde's head. "I promise." When the silence descended upon them again, Kris sighed. "Call it my large ego at work, but… when did you realized you loved me? No, let's go back even farther," she corrected. "When did you first start liking me?"

Ryanne smiled. She knew what Kris was doing, but guessed the woman was curious, as well. "I think I was attracted to you when you first walked in the café, but I knew I liked you when I saw you talk to your men and throw Paul out when he grabbed me. That really meant a lot," she said, her shivering lessening as Kris held her close.

"And I realized I loved you when I saw how you were with Cassidy," said the blonde, softly. "Watching you with her, I knew she loved you as much as I did. Did you know she's always come to me - rather than a stranger? That day at the base when she climbed up on your lap; I knew," the small woman concluded.

Kris smiled, thinking of the girl she'd come to think of as her daughter. "Really? I was the only one she did that to?" she asked, happily, and Ryanne nodded.

"Yep," she agreed, and then continued, "you're not getting off that easy, hon. When did you first develop feelings for me?"

The soldier thought about it for only a moment. "I started liking you right off the bat, as we talked in the café that night," she began. "I've never been one for talking, but I found I didn't want you to stop talking, because I like the sound of your voice.

"And I knew it was love when I saw the smile you gave me after I told you I'd let you stay with me, if you needed. God, I'd give you the world to see that smile," she grinned.

"We've been through a lot these past two years, huh?"

Ryanne paused for a moment - had it really been two years? Wow. "Yeah, we have," she agreed, quietly.

The solder took a deep breath, and decided now was as good a time as any to get it off her chest. Gathering her courage, she cleared her throat, and commenced, "Ryanne?" to get the woman's full attention.

"What?"

"You know I love you," she said, and Ryanne smiled.

"I love you, too," she echoed, gazing into nervous and almost frightened blue eyes.

"And I never want to hurt you," the soldier continued.

Ryanne frowned. "Kris…"

"Please," said Kris, wanting to say what she had to before she lost her rapidly diminishing nerve, "let me finish. I never want to hurt you, but I know I have, and all I can do is promise to try to do better. I meant everything I said in that letter, Ryanne - there's nothing I wouldn't do to make you happy.

"I love you with all my heart and soul. You are the most amazing, beautiful, and loving woman I've ever known. You are the best thing that's ever happened to me. I look at you, and I just can't believe how lucky I am. I never want to find out what it's like to wake up without you beside me. I never want to remember you ten years down the road, because I don't want you to be the one I remember.

"You are my only one. As long as I have you and Cassidy by my side, I'll never need anything else. I guess what I'm trying to get at with all this rambling, is… will you marry me, Ryanne?"

Ryanne just stared at her, and Kris' whole being rested on what that tear in those deep green eyes meant.

A loud "Hey!" startled them both. "Is anybody in there?" called the deep voice, and a light quickly scanned the inside of the cave.

"Here!" called Kris, and moment later, an expert water-rescue diver with a harness and rope arrived.

"Take her first," the soldier told him, when he reached for the tall woman.

"I'll come back and get her next," he said, and Kris glared at him.

"No, you won't. You'll take her first, damn it, because I will not leave unless I know she's safe."

The man sighed. "Okay, then. Your ride's here," he said, and instructed Ryanne on what he was going to do, and how to hold on. "I'll be back for you." Giving the signal to the helicopter pilot, Jim Colt ascended with his chilled victim to the awaiting medical personnel in the chopper.

Moving off the rock just for the sake of moving, Kris quickly realized that wasn't such a good idea. She'd gotten stiff, and needed to move just for a moment, but it didn't go as she'd planned. Finding her sore body unable to support her own weight, the tall soldier choked and sputtered as the river claimed her.

* * * * *

Jim Colt prepared to make another jump after turning Ryanne over to the care of the EMTs, when he noticed the dark form being tossed about by the river.

"Shit," he muttered. "We've got one in the water. Take me up ahead of her, and I'll jump there," he told the pilot, using the waterproof mike in his helmet, as the chopper moved forward until it hovered a few yards above the water's churning surface.

"You may only get once chance at this," said Bill, the pilot, and Jim nodded, carefully judging the time of his jump.

"Kris!" cried Ryanne, fearfully, upon noticing the woman's shape.

"I"m going," said the diver, as he leapt out of the helicopter and into the cold water. Thankfully, his partner had just let out the right amount of rope, and the tension kept his head above the water.

Grateful for the spotlight, Jim located the woman easily, and was able to grab her arm as she went by. Hefting her limp form into his arms, he called to his partner to hoist him up slowly, and for the EMTs to be ready - she wasn't breathing.

The medics took Kris from Jim as soon as they were able, and immediately began rescue breathing, since they found a steady pulse. After a few breaths of air reached her water-logged lungs, Kris coughed up the liquid as they turned her on her side, to expel all the water she could.

"Ryanne," she groaned, and the blonde, wrapped in layers of blankets, instantly reached out and took her hand, as the chopper headed towards the local hospital.

"What's wrong?" the woman asked, as Kris' sapphire eyes looked pale and scale, and the soldier squeezed her hand.

"I can't feel my legs."

Chapter Twenty-Four

Kris stretched her legs as she climbed in the back seat of Barry's car with Ryanne, more than ready to go home after a day in the hospital. A day which, thankfully, revealed that Kris' legs were only numb, and her shoulder intact. Ryanne was cold, but other than a few bruises, she was fine.

"Thanks, Barry," said the soldier.

The man grinned. "Don't mention it," he insisted. "I'm just glad you two are okay. Cassidy and I were wondering where you were, but she figured you were out partying and painting the town all sorts of wild colors."

Kris chuckled. "Well, it started out that way," she mused.

Suddenly, Ryanne reached out and took her hand, squeezing it gently. "I'm sorry, Kris," she said. "I really wanted your birthday to go better."

The tall woman was quick to reassure her. "Hey, sweetheart, listen to me. This birthday was one of the best I've ever had. I mean, I got to spend time with some of my closest friends, I had a chance to spend an entire evening with the woman I love, and even threw in a little adventure.

"And there was no way you could have known what would happen," she continued. "So don't worry about it, okay? I had a wonderful birthday."

The blonde smiled, and lightly kissed their joined hands.

Nothing more needed to be said.

* * * * *

Two days later, Kris walked through the door at ten-thirty, having to fill out numerous reports and various recommendations before she could leave. Intent on joining Ryanne in bed, she was startled to find the woman in the living room, wide awake and reading from her place on the couch.

The soldier stopped in her tracks when she realized exactly what the small blonde was reading. Her journal from the war.

"Hi," she said, softly, making the woman jump.

"Oh, hi," echoed Ryanne, quiet as she wondered why Kris suddenly looked pale.

The tall soldier sat down beside Ryanne, and sighed. "Ryanne, I never really meant for you to read that. Unless I was really gone, I mean," she corrected, gently.

"You don't want me to read it?"

Kris shook her head. "I can't stop you, hon. I just… well, there's a lot of unpleasant things in there. I didn't go into detail very often, but I did write down what was going on," she explained. "Don't stay up too late, hm?" Kissing the woman softly on the forehead as she got to her feet, the soldier walked into her bedroom, and soundlessly closed the door behind her.

Ryanne sighed. She hadn't meant to upset Kris, she'd just found the boxes while she was cleaning, and remembered about the journal. It was interesting, though. She was only on the first week, but already was amazed with how much the soldier downplayed about herself. The small blonde was sure the soldiers' commanding officer had done much more than what was on paper.

Deciding to finish the rest later, she put the book down, and silently climbed in beside the tall soldier. Seeing the muscled back turned in her direction, Ryanne put a gentle hand on the woman's shoulder.

"Kris, I'm sorry if I upset you," she voiced. "I just kind of wanted to get a better idea of what you went through while you were away. Really went through, not just what you told me in your letters."

Rolling over, Kris wrapped her arms around the blonde, whispering, "Thank you."

* * * * *

It took Ryanne a week to finish reading Kris' journal. She had to keep rereading entries, because she was sure she had to have read it wrong somewhere along the way. But, each time, it was the same. Kris had really thrown a grenade after being shot in the arm, she had really rescued one of her men, although she had to go through enemy fire…

She was still trying to believe it all, when Kris came home.

"All done, huh?" asked the soldier, seeing the notebook lying, closed, on the coffee table next to the couch. The blonde nodded, and Kris sat down next to her, wondering briefly if she should, or even if she could, tell Ryanne what she knew she had to.

"Ryanne, I need to talk to you," she began, quietly.

"What is it?" asked the small blonde, a little worried that it was bad news.

Kris sighed. "I've been trying to figure out how to say this… uh, do you remember what I asked you last week? While we were in the cave, I mean."

Ryanne nodded, slowly. "I think so," she said. "You asked me a lot of things, but I think I know what you mean."

"I asked you to marry me," reminded Kris. "I was just wondering if you'd thought about it, or if silence was the answer."

The woman was surprised. "I… I thought you were just asking because you thought we weren't going to make it, or something," she admitted.

The soldier shook her head. Come on, Jones - do this right. Sinking to the floor, she took Ryanne's hand in her own, and gazed up at her.

"I asked because I love you," she said, honestly. "God, I've been thinking about how to do this all week, and now my mind just went blank. Okay. Ryanne, when I first met you, I couldn't explain how I felt. It was like something in my heart, something that had been dormant for a very long time, suddenly came alive.

"And I was never one for talking, much less getting people to open up to me," she continued. "But I knew, when you hung up with Ms. Hillman that day, that I had to find out what was wrong. I had to help you. I wanted to help you. And I didn't want to let anything hurt you; or Cassidy, once I met her. I knew I would do everything in my power to keep you two safe, and to love you, even if it ended up I couldn't tell you.

"We've been through so much together, and I can't imagine my life without you. So, I'm asking… with all my heart. Will you marry me?" Reaching into the pocket of her jacket, the tall soldier withdrew a small box, and opened it to reveal a beautiful golden band, with emerald and sapphire stones embedded side-by-side to form the shape of a heart.

"Oh, Kris," breathed the blonde, in awe.

Kris swallowed, nervously. "If you'll have me, Ryanne, I'm yours - now and for the rest of my days." The woman watched as tears spilled over, and Ryanne nodded, still in a state of blissful shock.

With a soaring heart, Kris slipped the ring on the delicate finger, and kissed the small hand with tears of joy in her own eyes.

"Wait here," said Ryanne, squeezing the soldier's hand as she got to her feet, and hurried into the bedroom. Opening the drawer by her bedside, she removed an old and worn small cardboard box, taking it back out to the living room with her.

"Kris, nothing could possibly make me happier than I am right now," she smiled. "I've known from the start that I loved you, but I never really realized how deeply until I almost lost you. But we've made it through together, leaning on each other when we needed it and simply standing nearby when we didn't.

"I have to admit, I thought something was up when a big tough soldier had the guts to go buy a teddy bear for me and my daughter," she grinned, and Kris smiled, brightly. "There is no doubt in my mind that neither Cassidy nor I would be here today if it wasn't for you - thanks to you, we've made it through one of the most difficult parts of our lives. I know I'm not what you were looking for, but I thank God every day that I met you."

Opening the box, she continued. "This ring was my mother's; she gave it to Rachel to wear on her wedding day, my sister being two years older than me, and Rachel gave it to me before she died," said Ryanne. "And now, I want you to wear it. It's not much, but…"

Taking out the small band, which looked more like three thin gold rings entwined into a gentle twist, the blonde couldn't hold back the smile as she placed it on the tall soldier's ring finger.

Unable to hold back any longer, Kris cupped her hands around Ryanne's face, and gently kissed her lips, sealing their promises to each other. Both women knew the state wouldn't allow them to be wed by a priest, so they'd just had their own ceremony - they were married.

"Ryanne?" asked Kris, as she held the blonde in her arms.

"Hm?"

"You were right, you know." The small woman looked up at her, slightly confused. "You aren't what I was looking for. You're more." Ryanne smiled, and allowed the tall woman to take her by the hand, following her wife into their bedroom.

* * * * *

The following day passed by slowly for the tall soldier. It seemed to take forever for lunch to arrive; when it did, she raced to her quarters, and dialed quickly. Ryanne was staying at home, taking care of an ill Cassidy, who'd come down with the flu.

"Hello?" came the gentle answer - the blonde had a pretty good idea of who it was.

"Hi," smiled Kris. "How's Cassidy doing?"

Ryanne sighed. "A little better, I think," she guessed. "Her fever is still pretty high, and she hasn't eaten anything so far, but I finally got some medicine down her."

"That's good. Know what?"

"What?"

"I love you."

The small blonde grinned. "I love you, too, honey. I miss you," she admitted.

"Yeah, I know; I miss you, too. I'll be home in a little while, okay?" The two said their good-byes, and Kris hurriedly ate her lunch before joining her men out on the field again. If they noticed she was distracted, they didn't say anything.

"Hey, Sergeant Jones!" called Staff Sergeant Jenkins, as the woman rushed out to the parking lot. Coming to attention, she turned, and shook his hand as he approached. Being of equal rank, neither had to come to attention for the other, but they did, out of simple respect.

"Where're you going so fast?"

Kris grinned. "I'm going home to my wife," she said, happily, showing him the beautiful ring that she proudly wore upon her finger. Ronald enveloped her in a strong hug, congratulated her, and sent her on her way. As the tall soldier drove down the road, she realized it was the first time she'd ever had a family of her own to come home to.

She'd experience a lot of firsts, no doubt. But she'd share them with Ryanne.

For the rest of their days.



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