Violence Disclaimer: Yeah, some of that in here. Nothing real graphic, I don't think, but it does involve some not-so-nice high school kids.

Language Disclaimer: Okay, so she really tries not to curse, but it just slips out! Definitely some language in here, especially when one of the main characters gets ticked off.

Sex Disclaimer: This is alternative fiction, meaning it involves the idea of two women in love - with each other! If this bothers you, this story may not be for you, although there is absolutely nothing graphic.

Thanks: Thanks to my friends Charlene, Tina, AJ, and Amanda for the support and encouragement. You guys are great. More thanks and love to my best friend and beta, Amber, who puts up (not so patiently! <grin>) with my cliffhangers. Love you all.

Author's Note: For those of you who have noticed that I've been posting a lot of stories lately, this may be my last year to post anything for a while. If my plans for the future go through, I'll be off to college, and probably won't have a chance to post or write much. You can email me at Y02Mustang@AOL.com if you feel the need for the whole story, but I will do my best to complete the works I have in progress before that point. There are a lot of them, so be prepared! Thank you all for your support and feedback.

A clay pot sitting in the sun will always be a clay pot. It has to go through the white heat of the furnace to become porcelain.

- Mildred White Stouven

Part 2

At first, I was hurt. I thought I had made it clear that she could come talk to me, about anything, and for any reason. Why had she decided leaving was a better option? Here I was, hoping our friendship was growing stronger, only to have my hopes shattered by the sight of an empty bed.

It was then that I noticed the note on the bed. There, tucked under my pillow, was a piece of paper, with handwriting that I recognized. Reading it to myself, I could scarcely believe what my blue eyes were taking in. The letter read:

Bailey,

I am so sorry for causing trouble. I know you offered me your bed to sleep in, but I just couldn't accept… I shouldn't have said yes. You will never know how much the offer means to me, but I can't drag you into this… this nightmare.

You say you want to protect me, and keep me safe. If that's true, then, please, Bailey, try to understand why I had to leave. My brother would be angry if he found out his keys were gone, and so was I, and he'd be even more upset if he found out where I was and who I was staying with. If I were to call my parents like you'd said, he would have known from them where I'd gone, and you'd be involved in a dangerous situation. I can't do that to you.

I don't know how to thank you for all you've done… again, I'm sorry for doing this to you. I understand if you don't want to be friends anymore…

MJ

That was it. That was all it took to send me crashing to my knees on my bedroom floor. How…? How could it be that she didn't want to be friends? That took the air right out of my lungs. Had I done the wrong thing by inviting her? Did she think I'd be angry with her for leaving without really saying goodbye? What was going through her mind when she wrote that line?

All that speculating made my head hurt, so I decided to take a long shower, since there was nothing I could do about Mary Jane at that point. She was gone, that's all there was to it. Stepping under the warm spray, I tilted my head and let the droplets pound against my face, the normally relaxing sensation doing nothing to ease my worry.

I was in there for almost an hour, before my dad knocked on the door to check on me, and I reluctantly turned off the flow of water and grabbed a towel. Wrapping it around my body, I walked numbly into my bedroom, my hair dripping down the hall as I went. I dressed slowly, and reread Mary Jane's note a dozen times.

Nightmare… angry… dangerous situation… don't want to be friends… Those words kept popping out at me. She was calling her life a nightmare, telling me she was constantly living in a dangerous situation… that didn't help my concern any. And then to say she knew her brother would be angry when he found out what she'd done… hell, she'd gone right back home to the bastard!

But the last line is the one that really got to me. Kissing my dad on the cheek quickly before I left, not giving him time to ask any questions, I stopped at the local Denny's for breakfast before continuing on to school, intent on finding my friend and demanding an explanation.

As the bell rang, signaling the end of fourth period and the beginning of second lunch, I headed for Mr. Newton's room, hoping to intercept Mary Jane on her way outside.

No luck.

Poking my head in the room, I was in time to see Mr. Newton packing up his things to run out for a bite to eat, but no one else was left in the class.

"Was Mary Jane here today?" I asked, praying she wasn't absent.

The man nodded. "Yes, she just left for lunch," he told me, and I was about to turn around and head for the lunch area, when he continued with, "I haven't seen you lately, Miss Smith. I must say you dropped my class rather suddenly, but I do hope you're enjoying Mrs. Ender's class.

"I know we've had our conflicts, but let me know if you're interested in rejoining the class," he offered, and before I could pick up my jaw and ask the millions of questions that were running through my brain, he was gone.

I was dumbfounded. Mr. Newton was under the impression that I'd dropped the class? That meant he hadn't made a complaint about me to Mr. Heath! The principal kicked me out of the class all on his own; that was why he didn't want me discussing it with my counselor.

While that was a very interesting twist in and of itself, I was concentrating more on finding out what had happened with Mary Jane at the moment, and was trying to find her, when Andrew Turnkey stood in my line of sight and refused to move.

I sighed. "What do you want, Andrew?"

He grinned easily. "I want you to make good on your deal, Bailey. I want a date with your little friend," he insisted, and I could have knocked his block off right then and there for the little sneer he accompanied at the end of his statement.

You can't have her because I want her, I thought, but was able to stop it from becoming real words.

"We never had any deal, Andrew, and you're not going out with Mary Jane."

"Who says I'm not?" he demanded, shoving me in the shoulder.

I growled at him. "I do. I wouldn't set you up with any of my friends, Turnkey, because I happen to like them. I wouldn't submit them to such torture," I snorted, and turned to walk away, only to have him push me forward.

"Watch that step, Bailey!" he cried, laughing as I managed to catch myself before I fell… barely.

I shot him a look over my shoulder. "Watch your back, Andrew," I replied, evenly, and left the irritating little boy behind, making my way out the door, where I saw my friend sitting under her usual tree.

She looked down as soon she noticed me approaching.

Crouching down in front of her, I took a deep breath, and counted to ten. Then I counted to ten again. Then I gently lifted her chin with my hand until she was nervously looking me in the eye.

"Mary Jane, please tell me why you left," I requested, in my quietest voice.

"I had to."

"Why? Why didn't you come and talk to me? I thought you trusted me, MJ… Jesus Christ, you had me scared to death," I admitted, still focusing on not raising my voice. "I didn't know what happened to you before I found the note… I thought your brother had come for you or something!"

"He would have," she said.

I frowned. "I don't care. I promised you that while you were with me, and most certainly while you were in my house, I would keep you safe," I reminded her. "Didn't you believe me?"

"I believe you would have done your best to protect me," the blonde replied, and I nodded. "But, Bailey, you don't understand…! I don't want to put you in a position where you might get hurt trying to keep me safe. Please, I'm sorry I left like that, but I knew Damon would be home soon, and I didn't want him to find me gone."

I was silent for a moment… that was the first time she'd mentioned his name, and it startled me at first. When I recovered my wits, I asked, "What time did you leave?"

"About one-thirty… I… I couldn't get to sleep."

"Was he angry with you?" I hadn't noticed any new marks on her face or arms, but that didn't mean he hadn't hit her.

She shook her head. "I got home before he did, and he thought I walked… he just passed out on the couch," Mary Jane explained. "I put his keys back in his pocket while he was sleeping, so maybe he'll think he was so drunk he just couldn't find them."

"How did you get home?"

"I took the bus… I still had a little bit of money left, and I was the only passenger," she sighed. "The driver let me pay half because it was so late and he said I looked like I was in a hurry… I barely got upstairs before Damon came home."

I had to give her credit for being smart, but that didn't take away from the fact that she had scared the living daylights out of me. And I was still worried about that final sentence of her letter…

"Mary Jane, I… I need to ask you something."

She glanced up at me, alert and on edge. I think it was the first time she'd ever heard me stumble over a word. "What?"

"In your letter to me, you said something about not wanting to be friends…" I swallowed hard. "I need to know what you meant."

My friend nodded, as if she had been expecting that. "I'll understand if you're angry with me for leaving like I did… I shouldn't have done that."

"That's not enough for me to break up our friendship," I assured her.

"But, my brother…"

"Is a royal pain in the ass who will get what he deserves some day," hopefully by my own two hands, I added, silently. "But that's not enough for me to break up our friendship," I repeated.

"I left without telling you…"

I had to admit she had a point there, and I nodded. "Yes, that hurt," I confessed. "I wish you would have told me what was going on, and I feel like you didn't trust me. If anything, that's reason enough for me to try doubly hard for you to place your trust in me," I urged. "Please, MJ, don't give up. I don't want to lose your friendship."

An idea hit me. "Unless, you want to…"

She cut me off quickly. "No! No, Bailey, I like being friends with you… and I do trust you. I just think it will take me some time… I'm not used to having anyone around that I feel that way about," she said, and I agreed.

"You can have as much time as you need, MJ. I'll be here waiting whenever you're ready," I promised, and enveloped her in a strong hug, finally moving from my former position of crouched down in front of her when my ankles began to tingle, and sitting down beside her. Withdrawing a sandwich from my bag, I offered it to her, and we ate in a comfortable silence, just like we had many times before.

It felt nice to have that comfort level once more; all was well, as far as I was concerned. The world could come crashing down from all four corners, ending up in a pile of burning ash, and I wouldn't care. Mary Jane and I were still friends, and she would do her best to trust me and talk to me. Nothing else mattered.

I got to work a little early that day, and decided to jump on the chance to talk to Tina for a while, since she'd already closed down her lane. It was a fairly slow day, thankfully, but I suspected it would pick up around five or six.

Anyway, Tina and I chatted for a little bit, and then she happened to mention, "Hey, you know, my birthday is next Saturday."

I grinned. "I knew that."

"Sure you did, Hot Stuff. Anyhow, I'm having a party -"

"What time?" I interrupted. "'Cause I've got my Karate tournament in the afternoon."

She nodded. "Of course you do, Bailey. Did you think I'd miss one of your Kung Fu fights?" she laughed.

"Karate."

"Yeah, yeah," she chuckled, waving me off, but I knew she was just teasing. She hadn't missed a match since I started eight years ago. "Anyhow, like I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, I'm having a party Saturday night.

"Now, I know I'm turning eighteen and all that, but there'll be no alcohol or drugs, 'cause I don't do that sort of thing, and most of my friends, like you, are underage anyhow. I figure it'll start around seven.

"So, it won't mess up your precious schedule, oh high and mighty black belt."

I rolled my eyes, and gave her a mock shove.

"You're welcome to come," she added, as an afterthought.

I raised an eyebrow at her. "As if not being invited would ever stop me from crashing one of your shindigs, Tina?" I snorted, lightly. "I'll be there," I promised, as I turned to open up my lane.

"Oh, you can bring your friend, too," Tina noted, and I paused.

"Mary Jane?" I clarified, and she nodded, snapping her fingers as an imaginary light bulb came on above her head.

"Yeah, her. If she can go, I mean. I'd like to get the chance to meet the young lady Bailey Smith has finally fallen for," she smirked, dramatically, and I narrowed my eyes at her.

Pointing a finger in her direction, I warned, "Don't you say one word to her, Tina. She doesn't know how I feel about her, and if she finds out, it'll be your head I remove. Slowly."

Solemnly, she crossed her heart. "Promise, not a single, solitary word," she swore, before kissing my cheek and rushing out the door.

"Now, why don't I like that look on her face?" I mumbled to myself, as I flipped the switch and turned the light on for lane six, beginning my work promptly at four.

The week passed by rather quickly. I tried to find some time to speak to Mr. Heath about what Mr. Newton had said, but two things stopped me. First, I wanted to spend my free time with Mary Jane, not waiting in the principal's office, and second, I didn't know exactly what to say. I mean, it's not as if I could just march into his office and declare him a liar… well, I could, I just chose not to.

So, with no further interruptions of any kind, unless you count the dirty looks Andrew kept shooting in my direction, the Friday before Tina's party arrived. Lunchtime found Mary Jane and I outside under the same tree, sitting side by side as she munched on the second ham, turkey, and cheese sandwich I'd brought. It had been a good day, and both of us were in an exceptionally good mood, because Damon was scheduled to be out of town all weekend.

"Bailey?" questioned Mary Jane, grabbing my attention easily with her gentle voice.

"Hm?"

"What do you do at your Karate tournament?" The blonde had agreed to not only go with me to Tina's party, which took some convincing on my part to assure her it would be nothing like the last party she'd attended, but also to watch my tournament. She planned to stay the night Friday and Saturday, and already had her bag in the back of my Explorer, having promised me three times she wouldn't leave in the middle of the night.

Now, it seemed, she was curious about what to expect on Saturday afternoon.

I took a moment to think about it. "Well," I began, "there are a lot of different areas that are open, but I've signed up for the expert sparring and individual specialty kata." Seeing her blank look, I chuckled, and explained, "Basically that means I'll be going up against other students in hand-to-hand sparring, and also get the chance to do a few exercises with a weapon of my choice. I normally use my staff."

"You have to fight with someone?" she exclaimed, her green eyes wide.

The worry that I saw in her gaze, even if it was only in my head, warmed my heart.

"Hopefully with several people, if I advance like I hope I will," I confirmed. The panic in her gaze didn't lessen, so I continued, "Most of the levels wear gloves with some padding over the knuckles, but at the highest skill level, we're supposed to have enough control to pull our punches.

"Now, it is possible for the participants to get hurt, and I've even been bruised a few times, but it doesn't happen very often, and there are no head shots allowed," I assured her. "Plus, the idea is to block any blow. If we can't stop our opponent's move in the ring, than we won't be able to do it in a real fight, and we deserve to be reprimanded a little bit."

Turning to a little better aspect of the tournament, I said, "Both my dad and Tina will be there, so you'll be able to meet them. I don't think either of them has ever missed one of my matches. Tina even tried to make my promotions, if she can."

"She sounds very nice," she commented, and I nodded.

"Yeah, we've been friends since I was about two, I think. I'm sure you two will get along great," I predicted, with a grin. Nothing much was said after that, but I think she was a little nervous about the idea of meeting my dad and Tina. I couldn't figure out why, though.

Thankfully, the rest of the day went by amazingly fast, and before I knew it, I was meeting Mary Jane at the front steps of the school again. We walked to my car in silence, and as soon as we were buckled up, I had to ask.

"Mary Jane, what's wrong?"

She looked down at my dusty floorboard. "Nothing," she replied, and I sighed.

Taking a stab at what was bothering her, I said, "You don't have to worry about my dad or Tina, I promise. There is no doubt in my mind that you'll get along just fine with both of them."

"But… I don't have a gift for Tina."

I smiled at her concern. "MJ," dear God the word 'sweetheart' almost slipped out instead! "Tina isn't expecting a gift from you. In fact, there have been years when I haven't been able to get her anything but a card, and that's fine. Besides, she doesn't know you yet - I wouldn't worry about it too much."

Seeing the pensive look still on her face, I added, "But, if you really want to, you can make her a card on the computer when we get home, all right?" She seemed a bit happier by that suggestion, and there was quiet again for a while, until just before we turned the corner to my block.

"Do they know?" she questioned, and I paused.

"You mean about your brother?" She nodded, and I sighed. "Well, my dad really has no clue who you are at all. But, Tina… she's my best friend and I've known her for more than half my life." I was suddenly afraid Mary Jane would be upset with me for saying anything. "I tell her practically everything, MJ, but she doesn't know everything about the situation… I've only told her a little bit. I trust her, but I won't say anything anymore if you don't want," I assured her.

My friend shook her head. "If you trust her, Bailey… I just don't want everybody to know, you know?" she asked, her voice small, and I reached over to quickly squeeze her hand.

"I understand. So, since I'm off work today, what do you want to do?" I questioned with a grin, and she gave me a look that made me wonder if I'd grown another eye in the middle of my forehead or something. "What?"

"Nothing, it's just that no one's ever asked me that before."

I smiled. "Now they have. And it's up to you, MJ. What do you want to do today?"

We ended up walking over to the park and playing ball with Soda. He loved the chance to run and jump after his favorite tennis ball, and Mary Jane didn't seem to mind throwing a ball covered in dog slobber, so they were happy. As for me, I was content just to sit on the bench and allow the small blonde to lose herself in Soda's excitement for a few hours. The very tips of my fingers tingled at the sound of Mary Jane's laughter when Soda jumped straight up in the air to catch the toy… it was a wonderful sound that went straight to the center of my heart.

I vowed to myself to do whatever it took to hear that delightful noise a lot more often.

With a tired but happy sigh, she flopped down beside me, bringing me out of my thoughts. "He's got a lot of energy!" she exclaimed.

I chuckled, and scratched behind his ears when the object of our discussion came near. "Yeah, he's still pretty much a puppy," I agreed. "It'll be dark soon. We should probably head back," I commented, and Mary Jane stood without hesitation.

"Okay. Thank you for doing this, Bailey. I didn't mean to keep you, and I'm sure you have other things to do -"

Holding up my hand, I stopped her before she could continue. "No, Mary Jane," I said, softly. "I told you it was up to you, remember? If light wasn't a problem, we could stay out here until you wore out my dog," I grinned, trying to lighten the mood. "Please, don't be sorry for relaxing and having fun."

Mary Jane gave me a half smile. "Thanks, Bailey. I guess I'm just not used to having this kind of a day without restrictions," she admitted, and I wrapped my arm around her shoulders as we walked back towards my house, Soda right beside the young blonde artist.

"Do you remember the promise I made to you last week?" She nodded, sure I was going to withdraw it, I'd guess, by the way she flinched. I was quick to put her fears at rest. "Well, now I'm extending it to letting you relax. As long as you're in my home, or around me, you don't have to worry about getting in trouble for staying out late or for wanting to take some time out for yourself, okay? Anything you want to do, you can do it."

She put her arm around my waist in a hug that made my heart pause for a moment. "You really don't know what that means to me," Mary Jane murmured, more or less into my shoulder, and a crooked smile came to my face as I got a whiff of her shampoo. Peaches… whatever she used smelled like peaches. I had to mentally restrain myself from burying my face in the short blonde locks, as I suddenly gained a new appreciation for fruit.

Nothing more was said on the way, but that was okay. Her arm stayed around my waist until we were a block away, and I got the feeling she was nervous again. Even Soda must have sensed her apprehension, because he gently licked her hand, nudging her for a pat on his head.

"It'll be fine, MJ. Trust me," I whispered into her ear, as I opened the door and we stepped inside. Not seeing my dad anywhere, I motioned for Mary Jane to stay put while I looked in the garage, where I found him under the hood of his truck. Not surprising, considering he'd had his stitches taken out two days before, and was anxious to get back to work.

"Dad," I called, and he started, almost hitting his head on the hood.

"Bailey Joanne, don't do that to me!" he scolded, turning to face me, and I grinned a little as I shrugged. "Now, what do you want?"

"I want you to meet my friend." He stared at me, blankly. I rolled my eyes. "Dad, I told you Mary Jane was spending the night, and going with me to Tina's party after the match tomorrow. Remember?"

To my relief, he nodded. "Oh, yeah. That's right. Okay, well, let me wash up real quick. I'll say hi and then start dinner, how does that sound?" he offered.

I smiled. "Sounds great, Dad, thanks. See you in a bit."

As my dad went inside to wash the grease off his hands, I followed, intent on finding Mary Jane, since she was not where I'd left her. Hearing a rapid clicking noise, I entered the living room and found her typing away at the computer, apparently working on the card for Tina that I'd forgotten she wanted to make. It was absolutely unbelievable - her hands were a blur! I'd never seen anyone type so quickly.

"What 'cha up to?" I asked, casually, walking up beside her.

She leapt out of her chair like it was on fire, turning to face me with emerald eyes wider than I'd ever seen, an emotion much like fear radiating from their depths. "I - I'm sorry! I wasn't thinking, and I didn't do what you told me! I'm sorry, I know I'm inconsiderate and disobedient, and all I do is cause trouble, but…"

Her voice trailed off when I put a finger over her lips. I was startled enough by her sudden onslaught of apologies that my hands were shaking a little. "Mary Jane, stop. Stop right there," I told her, firm, and yet my voice was quiet. "It's me; it's Bailey, remember? You don't have to apologize for anything. You're safe here, and no one will hurt you for doing something on your own. Okay?"

Tears of what I assumed was embarrassment at her reaction spilled over and the blonde nodded, readily folding into my arms as I held her close.

"Hey, it's all right," I soothed, lightly rubbing her back. Pulling away a little, to look her in the eye, I continued, "You are not inconsiderate, MJ. You didn't disobey anything and you most certainly do not cause trouble. I don't like hearing you talk about yourself like that… you're none of those things, Mary Jane. You're great with computers, I'm sure you're a very talented artist, and I am proud to call you my friend," I told her, honestly, adding to myself, I'd be even happier to call you my girlfriend, but we won't go there just yet.

"I want you to promise me that if you start thinking like that again, or if someone tells you anything like that, you'll call me. I don't care what time it is; it can be four o'clock in the afternoon or three in the morning, all right? I want you to call me, because no one should have the right to make you think less of yourself," I explained, and she bit her lip as she looked up at me.

"Really?"

I nodded. "Really. So, do I have your promise, MJ? Any more degrading comments, and you'll call me?" I persisted, and my friend nodded.

"I'll try," she agreed, and I pulled her into one last tight hug.

"I can't ask you to do anything more than that, Mary Jane. Now," I sighed, when it became apparent to me that I was enjoying our close proximity way too much, "if my sense of smell is correct, and it hasn't failed me yet, dad has dinner cooking. Come on."

With that, we made our way into the kitchen, my hand discovering a mind of its own and lightly resting in the small of Mary Jane's back for a few moments. I swear, I don't know how it got there. If I'm lying, may lightning strike me dead where I stand… excuse me while I duck for the time being and make sure the lightning rod is in place.

Dinner came and went without a hitch, I'm pleased to say. My dad seemed to take a liking to Mary Jane, even if she was kind of quiet throughout the meal, and the small blonde didn't seem as nervous as I'd expected her to be. She even chatted a bit, shyly accepting my father's request that she call him "Darryl" instead of "Mr. Smith".

"I'll clean up here, Dad. You go to bed," I told him, since whatever bug he'd had the week before seemed to have come back full force. He'd been coughing for the past few days, and it had steadily gotten worse.

With a sigh, he nodded, kissing me on the cheek as he bid Mary Jane and I both a good night. "Sleep well, girls. I'll see you in the morning," he smiled, nodding to my friend. When the door to his bedroom was tightly shut, I turned towards the kitchen, and began clearing the table, surprised to have Mary Jane standing idly beside me, obviously waiting for something.

"What is it, MJ?" I asked, bringing the dirty dishes to the sink, so I could rinse them off before placing them in the dishwasher. We'd eaten boneless chicken breasts, rice, and vegetables, and while it was delicious, it made for a lengthy clean up.

"What can I do to help?"

I grinned. "Sit."

Startled green eyes glanced up at me. "What?" she questioned, frowning a little in confusion; I'll be the first to admit that I found the slight wrinkling of her nose to be especially cute.

"If you want to help, you can sit down and relax," I elaborated.

"Bailey…" she began, but I shook my head.

"Come on, MJ, humor me," I requested, gently. "I don't want you to have to do anything. I get the feeling you do enough at home. Give me the chance to take the burden from your shoulders for a little while, please?"

Taking a deep breath, apparently as surprised by my own words as myself, the blonde nodded. "Okay, Bailey," she agreed. "Thank you. Can I… I'll be on the couch in the living room, if you need me?" It was phrased more as a question, but I'd noticed the way she'd gone from an outright appeal to a tentative statement, and that pleased me. It meant that, at least, she was beginning to try to accept the fact that she was allowed to have her own mind when she was around me. That was what I was hoping for.

I smiled, and nodded. "Sure." Gracing me with a half-smile more beautiful than any my blue eyes had ever seen, she slowly walked into the living room and out of my sight, causing me to inhale quickly when I realized I'd lost my breath. God, she was gorgeous! My small blonde friend had a sexy sashay going on that I'd bet she never even knew she had… but it was enough to make me light-headed for a moment.

"I have got to learn to get a grip!" I scolded myself softly, still so distracted by the very nice picture that stuck in my mind's eye that I ran smack-dab into the refrigerator as I turned around. Shaking my head, I concentrated on clearing the table and filling the dishwasher, managing not to kill myself as I wandered through the kitchen with dirty knives in my hand. Like my dad said, it was an absolute miracle that my clumsiness hadn't been the cause of my own demise as of yet… yeah, he was the optimistic one.

When the kitchen was spotless again, I wandered out into the living room, panic seizing my heart when I didn't see Mary Jane's head over the back of the couch.

Did she leave? Oh, God, tell me she didn't leave! I prayed earnestly, rounding the corner so I could get a better view of the area, only to stop in my tracks. There, curled up on the couch with Soda by her feet, was Mary Jane, sound asleep. The day's events had worn her out, and I was unable to hide my crooked smile as I gently removed her shoes and placed them on the floor, covering her with a light sheet.

Soda glanced up at me as I moved around, and I held my finger to my lips. "Shh…" I urged my dog, whispering low. "Don't wake her up, Sodapop. Let the sleeping beauty rest, okay?" Licking his chops, he offered me a soft snort, and laid his head back down by the young woman's calf.

"Sweet dreams, MJ," I murmured, my heart beating faster as I felt myself leaning closer, placing a soft kiss on her forehead before I could do anything about it. With a sigh of relief, when she didn't wake up, I wandered down the hall into my own bedroom, asleep just as quickly as the blonde in the other room.

I woke up early the next morning, earlier than usual, and quickly changed into my gi. Barefoot, I stepped out of the house and into the crisp four o'clock morning air, standing in the driveway to practice. I always went through a few routines the morning before a tournament - it was like tradition or something.

I don't know how long I was out there, but I was in the middle of doing a kata I'd learned as a blue belt, when I happened to open my eyes. I normally moved with my eyes closed, feeling the flow of the energy in my veins and picturing the attack I was blocking in my mind, but when my eyes focused for a moment, I found Mary Jane watching me, sitting on the front step, the door slightly ajar.

I faltered, I'm afraid to admit, and instantly came to a close. Placing my heels together, I bowed to my imaginary opponent, and walked over beside the small blonde, who was still wearing my Bugs Bunny shirt.

"Good morning," I smiled.

"I didn't mean to interrupt."

I shrugged, and checked my watch. "Nah, I've been at this for more than an hour; it was time for me to take a break for a minute, anyhow," I assured her. "What are you doing up so early?"

She glanced up at me. "I'm used to getting up about this time," she said, and I kept quiet for the time being, choosing not to push as to why.

"Did you sleep well?"

Mary Jane nodded. "Yes, thank you. What about you?" she questioned.

"Pretty good. Well, I don't know about you, but I'm hungry. I'll make breakfast so Dad can sleep in a little while longer. That is, if you don't mind eating my cooking," I grinned, and the blonde gave me a small smile.

"That'll be fine." I was looking forward to the day when Mary Jane would actually be able to return my light teasing; I knew I'd never forget it. To have her accept everything I said without question kind of bothered me… I wanted us to be able to banter back and forth without her worrying about getting into trouble… but I realized that would take time.

I would wait. For however long it took, I would wait.

I made pancakes and hash browns for my dad and Mary Jane, having taken about twenty minutes to convince her that it was no trouble for me to fix something different than what I was eating, since I chose to have oatmeal for breakfast. I wanted something that would last, but wouldn't be too heavy on my stomach for the tournament.

I received praises from both my father and my friend on my cooking, Darryl joining us in the kitchen just as it was ready. He looked a little better than the night before, and swallowed about two glasses of orange juice in an attempt to get some vitamins in his body.

When I was sure my dad was feeling well enough to go to the tournament, I climbed into my Explorer, deciding to let my dad drive while I sat in the passenger seat. I considered allowing Mary Jane to call shotgun, but decided against it, when I realized she probably wouldn't feel comfortable sitting next to my dad for the entire ride.

With that settled, we all buckled in, and we were on our way to the gym of a local high school, which would serve as the dojo, in which I would have one of my most memorable matches ever.

The drive seemed to be even shorter this time around, probably because I was a little more nervous than usual. Having my dad or Tina around watching me wasn't a problem, but knowing that the woman I truly cared about would have her eyes on me was enough to make my palms sweat. You'd think after eight years I'd be used to the feeling of being watched at a match, but this was different.

Stepping out of the passenger side, I opened the door for Mary Jane, and then reached in to retrieve my staff. It was probably about an inch or so in diameter, and when I set it on the ground, it came up to just above my shoulder. The thick wood was worn and scarred, but it fit well in my hands, and, having had it for five years, I could wield the weapon with deadly accuracy if it was necessary.

"Wow." Mary Jane's quiet voice pulled me from my musings, and I found her green eyes staring at all the white-clad Karate students making their way into the gym, various colored belts adorning their uniforms. I spied only a few brown belts like myself, but the majority of them were all white or yellow - the first two ranks. I assumed this was probably their first tournament, and could only imagine how their knees were shaking.

"What do the white ones mean?" she asked, and I was all too willing to explain it to her if she was interested.

"The ranks go like this: white, yellow, green, blue, purple, brown, and then black. At least, in my dojo," I added, knowing that a few orange belts might be seen. If I'm not mistaken, that was something equivalent to about the yellow belt I was familiar with, though the meanings varied between different schools.

She glanced up at me, very quickly taking in the color I wore around my waist. "So, you're almost a black belt?" she questioned, and I nodded. "Wow," she said again, and I grinned.

"Come on," I urged her, seeing my dad make his way inside. "There's no way I can compete standing out in the parking lot. Well, I could, but I don't think the judges would appreciate it."

Mary Jane just smiled, and I was very glad she didn't think she had to apologize for making me stand out there with her while she asked about the tournament, and we walked inside.

There, numerous mats were set up, probably no less than two dozen, I'd say. Two judges sat in chairs at opposite corners of each one, with another judge, who served more as a referee of sorts sitting in the middle. The bleachers were already beginning to be filled with family and friends of the participants, and, for a moment, I was afraid my dad and Mary Jane wouldn't be able to find a good seat.

Then I happened to spot Sensei Moorland near the front row - she was speaking with Tina, which didn't surprise me, since my teacher and my friend had gotten to know each other rather well in the past eight years.

Calling to her, we bowed to one another as she approached, and then I made the introductions.

"Sensei, this is my good friend, Mary Jane. Mary Jane, this is my teacher, Nancy Moorland," I said, and the two shook hands, Sensei Moorland smiling warmly at the small blonde by my side.

"It's very nice to meet you, Mary Jane."

Mary Jane gave her a polite smile. "And you, Ms. Moorland."

My teacher let out a loud chuckle. "Call me Nancy, please. The only time anyone uses my last name is usually when they're one of my students," she explained, and I could tell Mary Jane was swallowing an apology.

"Thank you, Nancy," she said, and I gently squeezed her shoulder.

"Well, I need to get going. The individual specialty katas have been moved to the last event, by the way," Sensei Moorland informed me, and I nodded, pleased. That gave me more time to practice, whether between events or before the sparring.

"Good luck to you, Bailey, though I know you won't need it," she grinned. "It looks like Tina saved you both a seat, so you should be able to see the events just fine." With that, she shook my dad's hand, bowed quickly in my direction, and made her way to the judge's registration table.

"You guys can go ahead and grab the seats with Tina," I told them. "I'm going to go warm up for a few minutes before the first round starts." They both nodded, and then walked over to where Tina was frantically waving, my dad introducing Mary Jane and Tina. I could tell right away that Tina liked her; just by the way she warmly gripped the blonde's hand.

Finding an open spot on a mat not far away, I found an imaginary starting line, and placed my heels against it. Bowing to my non-existent opponent, I went through a quick exercise, pleased when my heels ended up in the same place they started - that meant I had done the moves correctly. It was easy to overstep in practice, but the fact that I had learned it well enough to do it flawlessly made me very happy.

I had just finished when a man's voice came over the speakers, announcing that the beginner's level sparring was about to start in one area, while the intermediate and expert levels would begin in another. Seeing several brown and black belts migrating towards the judges that sat at table eleven, I followed, and obediently sat down at the edge of the mat while the first two were called.

I watched the match with interest - both were good, but I could pick out several flaws with each of them. I knew which was more experienced, and I could tell the other one was letting his nerves get the best of him.

A few minutes later, the one I branded as more experienced was declared the winner, and they bowed to each other, even going so far as to shake hands, before the challenger took his place on the floor. I was glad to see the good sportsmanship that accompanied most tournaments held true.

"Bailey Smith." I was up next. Getting to my feet, I bowed quickly before stepping onto the cushioned blue mat, and then stood in front of the champion. He was a little smaller than me, maybe 5'7'' I'd guess, with blonde hair in a buzz cut and excited brown eyes.

"Face me and bow," said the judge, and we turned, doing as we were told. "Face each other, and bow." We obeyed. "No head shots allowed, anyone caught doing so, or attempting to do so, will be disqualified. First one to three points wins. Ready. Begin."

My opponent was quick to make the first move, and struck out with his fist, but I easily dodged the punch and followed through with a light elbow in his side. The man who acted as a referee instantly called us back to the starting line, waving his arm in my direction, telling me I had gained one point. A flag went up, as the judge sitting in my corner acknowledged a point in my favor for the entire crowd to see.

"Bow," the judge commanded. "Ready. Begin," he continued, stepping back out of our way. This time the guy kept his guard up, circling me for a while, before I had to remind myself this was not a boxing match. Going for a punch that I knew would be blocked, I took the opportunity to swing around and sweep his feet out from under him, swiftly kneeling beside him, my hand coming to rest lightly on his chest.

"Point, Smith." The flag on my side went up again, and a few claps were heard. Called back again, I could see the determination in the blonde kid's eyes… he didn't want to lose. The first win had made him cocky and proud, and he didn't want to lose face on only the second match.

I didn't really feel bad at all about gaining my third point immediately. He wasn't even expecting the sidekick, the word "Begin" had barely left the judge's mouth when I brought my foot off the ground, and I hoped that would teach him to be more aware.

"Point and match, Smith," announced the white-clad judge with a red belt, marking him as a grand master, and a purple ribbon pronouncing him a judge. "Face me, and bow. Face each other, and bow." We obeyed, and I watched the young man swallow his pride as he reached for my hand. I gladly shook it, and gave him an approving nod of my head, acknowledging his effort.

The next four matches went quickly, and fairly effortlessly on my part. One of my opponents got up to one point, but that was it, before I came up with a combination that got me the final point.

Before I knew it, I was facing my final partner, and I recognized him from previous tournaments - his name was Timothy Davis, and he was the same rank I was; a three-striped brown belt, but he had actually been in longer. His dojo had a rule about not becoming a black belt until the student turned eighteen - he'd been a brown belt for three years, or so I'd heard.

Seventeen and about an inch taller than me, he had broad shoulders, and his large gi did nothing to hide the muscles in his torso. There was no question about it - my final round would not be easy.

As we bowed to each other, I noticed a small smirk on his face. He was confident about his own abilities, and the fact that he had watched me for five rounds made me uneasy. He'd had time to study me and the tendencies I might have had, ones I didn't even notice. That wasn't good, seeing as it gave him an extra edge, and I didn't need that against me.

Given the order to begin, I immediately slid my left foot forward a few inches, turning my toes in slightly to form a balanced and strong stance. Bringing my right hand close to my chest and my left hand out in front of me a little further, I was ready to defend myself.

I didn't even have time to blink before Timothy became a flurry of motion. He went through one combination after another, and it wasn't twenty seconds later that the judge was announcing the first point - Davis.

Damn it, I thought, and concentrated harder on watching his moves. I gained the next two points by blocking his attempts, and following through with a quick jab or kick of my own. If we were doing it right, whenever we punched or kicked, the snap of our clothing should have been apparent. As it was, both of us were performing up to par.

A quick glance to Mary Jane, which I shouldn't have done because it revealed that she was watching me with frightened green eyes, and Davis was able to touch my exposed ribs with his foot. Now the score was tied.

Taking a deep and calming breath, I forced myself to think only about the match. Mary Jane would have to wait until later. My dad and Tina would both have to wait until later. The only thing that mattered to me at the moment was my opponent - that was how it had to be. If I got distracted I would lose, it was as simple as that.

"Ready. Begin." I blocked a punch-kick combination, and followed with one of my own, but Timothy didn't let me get through. About a minute passed, neither of us gaining the winning point, and I noticed that his eyes kept watching my right hand… the one closest to my body. I couldn't figure it out. Either he was planning to make a move, which would be stupid considering he'd have to make it past my left hand first, or he realized I led with my right hand more often… no matter what, it spelled trouble.

Shifting his weight, he brought his right foot up into an arc, aimed straight for my head. I was startled, but reacted quickly, and his kick hit my forearm instead of my head.

"Stop!" cried the judge, and I pushed the blonde's foot away from me with a growl. "Warning, Davis. No point. Another move like that and you're disqualified, young man. Ready, begin."

I couldn't understand why he wasn't disqualified right off the bat, but it didn't bother me too much. After all, I didn't want to win by default. I wanted to win because I'd earned it, not because some punk decided to get a little over zealous.

Seeing him try for the kick again, I was ready this time, and grabbed his ankle. Pushing upwards, I forced him onto his back with a thud, and quickly jabbed at his middle, my sleeve snapping with the speed.

"He-yah!" As soon as the move was done, I came back to my defensive position, keeping an eye on him, although I'd already won. The judge in my corner with the flag had seen to that.

"Point, Smith. Match, Smith. Event, Smith. Congratulations," smiled the judge, shaking my hand, after respectfully bowing. I repeated the gesture, and grinned as I bowed to the judge in my corner, and the panel sitting up front. There was no dispute as to who had won, so I didn't have to wait for them to delegate an answer, which was good. I had a while to practice with my staff, and to join my friends and family up in the stands if I so chose, until the awards ceremony.

Timothy bowed quickly, but made no attempt at shaking my hand. I watched him storm away from the mat, heading towards a man I recognized as his father, who didn't look too happy at the cheap shots his son had made, not to mention the poor sportsmanship.

"Doc, you were great!" came a voice, and I turned to find myself folded into the arms of my exuberant and very proud father.

"Thanks, Dad," I smiled, and returned the hug.

Tina was next. "Way to go, Hot Stuff!" she squealed, embracing me around the neck until I couldn't breathe.

"Uh, Tina… air, please." Tapping her arm fiercely, she finally released me, and I turned to Mary Jane. She still looked a little upset, though I think I was the only one who noticed it. I assumed it was because she'd seen me fight, and probably went through some similar scenes at home.

Stupid! I cursed myself. Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why didn't I think! I shouldn't have brought her here. She gets enough fighting at home… now she had to sit there and watch me go through it. Even if it was just a tournament, I'm sure it scared her to death and brought forth a lot of not so pleasant thoughts. Damn it!

She must have seen the apology in my eyes, because she smiled a little and assured me, "You did great, Bailey."

"Thanks," I grinned, promising to really apologize later.

The rest of the tournament went rather well. I took second with my staff, behind only two points. The guy who won used the sais, a weapon with which I was very familiar, but he did excellent, and I was pleased to place so close to him. After collecting my trophies, I bid goodbye to Tina, who said she had to go get ready for the party. My dad offered to take Mary Jane and I our to lunch to celebrate, and I relented, knowing how much my dad enjoyed doing something together after every tournament.

We stopped at a Denny's, my dad not bothering to let me change out of my gi, and when he excused himself to use the restroom, I jumped on the opportunity to talk to Mary Jane.

"Listen, MJ, I'm sorry. I didn't even take the time to think about how the tournament might affect you," I explained, urgently.

She reached over and touched my hand, instantly silencing my ramblings. Smiling warmly, she simply said, "Thank you for inviting me."

Five words and I knew all was well.

Once lunch was over, and my dad had convinced Mary Jane he wouldn't let her pay for her meal, we returned home so I could change before the party. Coming out of my room in jeans and a T-shirt, I found Mary Jane clutching Tina's card in her hand, apparently ready to go. Telling my dad I wasn't sure exactly what time we'd be home, I kissed his cheek and plucked my gift up from the couch, and walked out with my friend.

Little did I know, Tina wouldn't be the only one receiving a gift that night.

As we arrived at Tina's house, a song came on the radio that Mary Jane must have liked - I caught her softly humming along, and turned it up for her with a grin.

"Why don't you stay out here until the song is over?" I offered, putting my Explorer in park. "Just lock it up and bring the keys in with you," I winked, and the blonde agreed. "Great. I'll see you in a few, then."

My first task was to find Tina. It wasn't too hard - not surprising, my friend with a love for food was in the kitchen stealing snacks from her own food tray.

"Hey, Tina," I greeted, throwing my arm around her shoulders. "Isn't that food supposed to be for us guests?"

"I'm the birthday girl, Bailey, leave me alone! Hey, you brought a gift!" Before she could grab it, I pulled the box away.

With an evil grin, I warned, "I wouldn't open this in front of anyone else."

"Should I be worried?" she asked, taking the present and shaking it.

"Very."

One time when we were hanging out at my house, we were both thirteen, we happened to stumble across a box of condoms. I still don't know how they got there, unless one of my other friends or my dad's friends might have left them behind, but even back then my best friend knew my preference was for women. So, it had been a long-standing joke between us that if Tina ever had a guy over and was in an emergency, she'd ask me for a condom, since I would never need one.

Accordingly for her eighteenth birthday, I'd gotten her a box of condoms. I knew she'd remember the joke, I just thought that perhaps her parents wouldn't find it as amusing, nor would her friends understand.

"Didn't Mary Jane come with you?" she questioned, and I nodded.

"She's in the car."

Suddenly, an idea struck her, and her face visibly brightened. "Oh, Bailey, we're playing Spin the Bottle," Tina smiled, and I glared at her.

"Don't you remember what happened the last time you tried to set me up through that stupid game?"

"How was I supposed to know she was only interested in your car? Anyway, this will work - I mean, you know you like Mary Jane," my conniving friend reasoned.

"That's just it, Tina," I sighed. "I do like Mary Jane. A lot. And I don't want to do anything to mess up our friendship. What if she doesn't feel the same way? I'd never forgive myself if I scared her away," I admitted, but that confession didn't faze my friend a bit. That meant she'd put a lot of thought into this… and that frightened me.

"So you just leave it up to her." I paused, confused. "Make it her decision without totally revealing your feelings."

"How do I do that?"

"Duh, Bailey!" Her hand came up to tap me on the forehead, and I raised an un-amused eyebrow. "Tell her you don't know how to play - we're combining Spin the Bottle with Ten Minutes in Heaven, by the way." I groaned, and Tina laughed. "Come on, Hot Stuff. You said she's gone to parties with her brother, right? I'm sure she knows how to play."

I frowned. "And if she doesn't?" was my skeptical response.

"I'll explain it to everyone before we begin, and you'll just happen to be out of the room."

I wasn't comfortable with the idea of lying to Mary Jane, but if it meant a safe way to find out how she felt, I was game. Remember, I said I didn't like lying, not that I never did it.

"You are an evil, evil woman, Tina," I told the brunette. She smiled brightly, and I broke into a grin. "I love you." Laughing, I gave her a hug, and both of us jumped when a quiet voice called my name.

It was Mary Jane.

Jesus, how long has she been standing there? How much did she hear? my mind panicked. Judging by the look on her face, however, she hadn't heard anything major. It looked like I was still in the clear.

"Here are your keys, Bailey," said Mary Jane. "I locked it."

I smiled. "Thanks. I wasn't worried," I assured her, placing my keys back in my pocket as Tina noticed the card in the blonde's hand.

"Oh, you made me a card!" she squealed, giving the startled girl an enthusiastic hug. "Thank you! I love it!" Mary Jane smiled, pleased her meager gift had been so well received.

"Come on, come on, the games should be starting soon. I'm sure Bailey will introduce you to anyone you don't know," Tina promised Mary Jane, and ushered us into the living room. Glancing around, I saw only a few new faces. I knew most of the guests, but one in particular caught my eye.

Grabbing Tina's arm, I hissed into her ear, "What is he doing here?"

Following my finger, Tina shrugged. "Andrew? I don't know; he's a friend of a friend, I think. Why? What's wrong?" she questioned, frowning at the look on my face.

"If you don't want me to snap his scrawny little neck, you'll make sure he stays as far away from Mary Jane as possible," I growled, and released her so I could join Mary Jane, who was standing awkwardly a few feet away.

A few minutes later, Tina announced the games were about to begin, and called everyone into the living room. Standing beside Mary Jane, who'd been doing very well so far, I felt my heart stop when her hand brushed against mine. Was that an accident? Nothing more came of it, and I was finally able to breathe, but I couldn't help wondering.

"Bailey, could you get me a glass of punch?" Tina's question startled me out of my musings.

"Why can't you get it yourself? Legs broke?" I automatically shot back.

Her eyebrow went up higher than I'd ever seen. "No, I just want you to get it for me, since I'm feeling a little thirsty," she stated, fiercely.

Ding! The light bulb went on above my head, and I nodded. "Of course. I'd love to," I smiled, and told Mary Jane I'd be right back. I could hear Tina's voice all the way in the kitchen, and had to chuckle at her words - she was making sure no one would wonder if Mary Jane and I went into the closet together.

"Now, if two guys or two girls happen to be chosen, don't worry about it," she assured her friends. "The girls can gossip for ten minutes, and the guys can arm wrestle or whatever - just don't kill each other. Any questions? Let's get this show on the road!"

I took that as my cue, and came back into the living room, handing Tina her drink. Everyone had formed a circle on the floor, so I found a space not far from Mary Jane, glad to see Andrew had been placed on the almost total-opposite side as her, and joined the players. The first two pairs went quickly, though one girl was tucking her shirt back in when she came out of the large closet Tina had cleared out.

For those unfamiliar with this specific combination, I'll briefly explain the rules. One person spins the bottle, and instead of kissing whomever it lands on, they go into a room with that person, and do whatever they want for the allotted time. Tina had given us ten minutes alone, hence the "Ten Minutes in Heaven".

Mary Jane was next, and I watched her reach out to give the bottle a good spin. I have never prayed so hard in all my life. My heart was in my throat, and when I saw it come to a stop, I had the sudden urge to leap up and do a little happy dance when I realized it was pointing to me.

Thank you, God!

Taking a deep breath so I wouldn't pass out, I got to my feet and followed the small blonde into the closet, hearing Tina comment to everyone that we were just going to gossip.

If there's a God up there with a miracle to send my way, talking won't be the only thing we'll be doing with our lips, I thought, grinning inwardly.

Sitting down on the floor, facing Mary Jane, I decided to go ahead with the plan Tina had come up with.

"So, now what do we do?" I asked, and her green eyes looked startled. "I've never played this before."

I can pinpoint the exact moment she realized the ball was in her court - it was when I heard her swallow. It was up to her, now. Would she tell me what most people did, or would she tell me what Tina had told them? That would be the defining moment.

"Well, um, most of the time when two people are in here, they, uh, they kiss," she managed to stutter out, and, God help me, I think I still looked innocent.

"Like this?" I questioned, leaning forward a bit to lightly kiss her cheek. Delicate skin like no other touched my lips, and I had to force myself to pull away a few moments later, for fear of never being able to move from that spot again.

Mary Jane nodded, and seemed a bit flushed. "Well, yes, but…"

"But, what?" Okay, so I was bad. Yes, I was putting her on the spot. But this was it! I couldn't stand it!

"Well, uh, normally, it's… on the lips." The last part was a whisper, but it was enough to make my heart soar.

Still, I had to be sure. When I leaned forward this time, I considered pausing to ask her if she really wanted this, when our lips met. I'm still not clear on whether I moved quicker or if she just leaned closer to me. Either way, it was the most wonderful, exquisite, and unexplainable experience in my young life. Only my heart can speak the true words worthy of such a feeling… paper and pen don't do it justice, believe me.

When I pulled back, I wasn't sure if it was her heart that I heard beating so fast, or mine. I think it might have been both.

"This is okay?" I murmured, and she slowly nodded.

"Yes."

I kissed her once more, and then drew her into a strong hug, stroking her hair as I kissed the top of her head, softly. We stayed like that for a little while, just absorbing the closeness, before I decided I needed to make our togetherness official.

"I know it might be hard, and I understand if, for whatever you reason, you decide you can't, but… Mary Jane, will you be my girl?" With nervous blue eyes, I waited anxiously for her response; which was to smile brightly and lean her head against my shoulder.

"Yes," was the quiet syllable that changed me forever. It changed my idea of trust, love, and turned my world upside-down… never had one word meant so much.

There was silence for a while, and I saw we still had about seven minutes left. That was good. There was more I wanted to say. I wanted to kiss her again, sure, I wasn't crazy, but I wanted her to know a few things, as well.

"MJ, you know I'm here for you, right? Anything you need," I reminded her.

"I know, Bailey. We used to be a happy family," she said, abruptly, and I realized she had suddenly decided to talk to me. I was silent, allowing her to gather her thoughts. I told her I'd always be there if she wanted to talk, and that meant anytime - no matter when she might decide she was ready. "My mom, my dad, my brother and I. It wasn't always like this… but it's my fault."

"Mary Jane…" I began, but she squeezed my hand, and I fell quiet.

"No, Bailey, it is," she insisted. "We used to go on fishing trips, and camping trips, and go to movies, and watch TV at home together. Just like every other normal family in America. We had Barney, a Boxer puppy we got when I was eleven, and Socks, a cat we've had for as long as I can remember.

"But when I was almost thirteen, my brother found my diary, and decided to be a typical snoop and look through it," she sighed. "He read an entry that told about how I thought I had a crush on my best friend - I was young, but I already knew I was different than most of the girls my age. I didn't care about Jonathan Taylor Thomas; I was more interested in Jodie Sweeten.

"He freaked out and told my parents… my dad got very upset and my mom got very quiet. They knew they couldn't throw me out, but they both decided it would be best if they just ignored the problem. I guess they thought it would go away, but I was the problem…

"My brother, on the other hand, took it upon himself to 'change me back' from being gay." I flinched at this statement. "He thought that if he could keep me away from all girls, and make me hang around with his guy friends, and show me exactly what I'd be missing if I didn't have a man in my life, that I'd stop being gay. When something happens that makes him think I've 'turned', that's when he gets angry.

"So, it is all my fault."

"No, MJ, no," I soothed, pulling her to me. "It's not your fault that your parents don't accept you for who you are, and it's not your fault your brother read your diary. Don't ever think that, okay?" I urged, and then a thought hit me. "Wait… when he sees us together at lunch… when I bring you home… does that make him think you've 'turned'?" I questioned.

The blonde's eyes hit the floor.

My heart followed suit. "Oh, God," I groaned. I felt sick. "Mary Jane, why didn't you ever tell me? I wouldn't have done that if it got you in trouble!"

She looked up at me, green eyes full of tears. "I know," she said. "I didn't want you to stop sitting with me."

"Oh, MJ," I sighed, wiping away her tears with my thumb, before kissing her cheek and gently rocking her in my arms. "I'm so sorry. I want you to tell me the next time we do something that you think might get you in trouble, okay? We'll find a way around it," I promised, seeing that she was about to object.

She nodded. "We'll… we'll have to be careful," my girlfriend (is there a sweeter word?) stated, and I agreed.

"I know."

Tina suddenly knocked on the door. "Two minutes to gab, you two," she called.

"Nothing would make me happier than telling everyone within shouting range," I grinned, "but I know there's a lot of people who wouldn't be nearly as thrilled as I am. Especially at school… we'll have to just be friends, like before." As much as it broke my heart to say that, I knew it was true. That's why Tina had gone through all the trouble to dispel any of the partygoers' suspicions.

"Bailey?"

"What is it?"

She faltered, and I urged her on with a kiss to her temple. "You… you have a nickname for me…" was all she could get out in a rush of breath, and I smiled, gently.

"Do you have a nickname you want to use for me?"

"Can… would it be okay if I called you Bugs?"

I smiled until I thought my face would break… heard that saying 'an ear-to-ear grin'? Well, I think if I smiled any wider I would have been able to kiss my own ear.

"I would love it," I told her, and we kissed quickly, before reluctantly moving apart when Tina grabbed the knob of the door. She gave us sufficient warning that she was coming, so I reminded myself to thank her before the night was out.

Trying to act natural, we returned to our spots. I found myself unable to look away from Mary Jane, however. She seemed even more beautiful now that I could rightfully call her my girlfriend; strange, I know, but it's true.

"All right!" A shout from across the circle grabbed my attention, and I rolled my eyes when I noticed it was Luke, a senior who'd made his crush on me public knowledge, and his spin had brought the bottle to me. With a sigh, and a reassuring wink to Mary Jane, I followed him into the closet.

"Look, I really don't…" I began, but was silenced when his lips crushed against mine, and I even felt his tongue pushing roughly against my mouth, demanding entrance.

Fucking prick! I'm going to have to wash my mouth out with kerosene, now. I didn't think anymore, I just reacted.

He stumbled out with a bloody nose, and I shrugged at the startled onlookers. "He tried to kiss me," was all I said, and they laughed at the poor guy. If any of them thought Mary Jane and I had kissed, those thoughts were probably long gone after that incident… I was glad.

Catching the blonde's eye, I gave her a quick grin, and her green eyes lit up as she nodded. She trusted me to do the right thing, although we had only just gotten together; that was a great feeling.

I growled when I realized who was up next - Andrew. Watching him take his turn very carefully, I willed his head to explode when I saw who the bottle had chosen.

Mary Jane.

My blood boiled. My nose flared. My eyes narrowed. When I saw the little grin on his face I felt the tendons in my neck tighten as I snarled, and I was ready to get to my feet to knock the stuffing out of the ass hole before he could take another breath, when Tina called for our attention. She had been watching the whole thing from the kitchen, bless her heart, and had seen the match between Mary Jane and Andrew.

"All right, I think that's enough games for now! How about cake and ice cream?" she offered, and several people scrambled to grab paper plates and forks. The game was forgotten, and Andrew got to live another day.

Damn.

The party was a success, and other than three guys being thrown out for bringing beer, it went smoothly. Tina got a lot of gifts, mostly gag gifts, and we all got a good laugh when she unwrapped a book entitled, "101 Things to Do With a Useless Man". That even got a smile out of Mary Jane. We were sitting next to each other, and it was so hard for me not to take her hand, but I somehow managed to restrain myself, and we left the party with no one becoming wise to our new relationship.

Well, no one except Tina. She approached me just before we walked out the door, saying, "If you don't wipe that stupid grin off your face, my friend, everyone will think you got laid."

I chuckled. "I can't help it," I responded. "I'm just so happy! And thank you for everything tonight, Tina."

"Not a problem, hon. I'm happy for you, Hot Stuff. Now, go see to your girl before she wonders where you are," my friend smiled, giving me a quick hug before sending me off.

Climbing into the driver's side after opening the door for Mary Jane, I started the engine and that was all I could take. We'd been alone for all of three seconds and I reached out to gently grasp her hand, thrilled beyond words when she interlocked her fingers with my own.

We stayed like that the entire drive home, and I reluctantly drew my hand away to put my car in park when I pulled into the driveway. Turning to face the small blonde beside me, I sighed as I said, "I think it would maybe be best if we didn't tell anyone just yet." Mary Jane agreed. "Okay. How about we go inside and hit the sack? It's already past eleven o'clock."

"Okay. Bailey?" she asked, and my hand stilled on the handle of the door.

"Yeah?"

"Can I… can I wear your T-shirt again?"

I smiled, and lightly kissed her nose, causing her to break into a startled grin that warmed my heart. "I wouldn't have it any other way, MJ," I promised, and the first thing I did when I walked in my room was retrieve the said T-shirt. We both changed quickly, and then she helped me make up the couch, finally realizing she had no hopes of convincing me to sleep in my own bed while she took the sofa.

When the couch was ready, I followed her back into my bedroom, under the pretense of making sure she had everything she needed.

"Yes, thank you. Good night, Bugs," she said, smiling a little.

I laughed softy, finding that I really liked the name as it tumbled from her lips. "Good night, MJ. Sweet dreams." Before I knew what was happening, I felt our lips come together gently, and my hand reached up to caress the side of her face as we kissed. I think I was the one that initiated the meeting of our tongues, but once again, I can't be sure. At any rate, time stopped when I tasted her for the first time.

Not wanting to do too much too soon, I slowly pulled back, the happy smile reaching my eyes as we lightly rubbed noses. God, I had never wanted to be so close to another human being in my entire life. I didn't ever want to leave the warmth of her lips, the depth of her eyes, or the beat of her heart.

"Good night," I whispered, and forced myself to walk out of the room before I got carried away. I flopped down onto the couch with a sigh that brought Soda to my side, gently nudging my arm, looking concerned.

"I'm all right, Soda," I assured the dog, scratching under his chin. "I'm just in love."

The next morning I awoke with a start, and hurried to my room. Although Mary Jane had promised she'd stay, there was still a small part of me that worried her fear of Damon would get the best of her and she'd leave.

To my relief, I found her sleeping soundly, curled up into the cutest little ball under my blankets. I was struck speechless. She was so beautiful, and she looked so peaceful. In her rest, at least, she was free from the troubles of her family. I had the overwhelming urge to just climb in beside her and curl up against her…

"Oh, you're up."

I jumped about a mile, and turned to see my dad, just stumbling out of his room.

"What time did you get in?" he asked, and I willed my heartbeat to return to normal.

"About eleven," I shrugged, and he nodded.

"That's not too bad. What would you girls say to washing the cars after breakfast?" When I agreed, my dad said he'd start cooking if I wanted to wake Mary Jane, and then left me on my own. When I was sure he was occupied in the kitchen, I quietly entered my bedroom and knelt down beside my slumbering girlfriend, careful not to startle her.

"Mary Jane," I whispered, and gently brushed her hair away from her face only to place a soft kiss on her cheek. She groaned, and I realized that, given the chance, she was not an early riser as I had thought. That made me smile, and the idea of letting her sleep in was very tempting, but I knew Dad would have breakfast ready soon.

"MJ, time to get up." It took a few more minutes of coaxing to get her to wake up, and I smiled as sleep-filled emerald eyes focused on me. "Hey, there."

"Morning," the blonde replied.

"Dad roped us in to washing the cars after breakfast," I told her, and she accepted this with a nod. "It should be ready to eat in a little while, if you want to get dressed or take a quick shower."

She took me up on the offer, and soon I heard water running. The only thing that did was make me wonder if I'd get to see her clad in just a towel. Instead of getting myself in trouble by waiting in my bedroom for her to return, I made my way into the kitchen to help cook.

When she walked into the kitchen a few moments later, I very nearly poured the third batch of pancake batter on the floor instead of on the griddle. She was wearing a pair of red shorts with a gray t-shirt, no shoes, and her hair was still damp. I realized this was the most relaxed I'd ever seen her, and it was a wonderful sight.

"Good morning, Mary Jane. You look rested this morning," my dad smiled.

Mary Jane nodded. "Good morning, Darryl," she acknowledged. "I am rested, thank you."

It was hard not to pull the chair out for her, but I had to act natural around my father, or I was afraid he'd suspect something, and I couldn't have that; at least, not yet. Since I didn't know for sure how he'd react, I didn't want him to find out only to discover an angry parent would ruin my new relationship with Mary Jane.

After the pancakes, bacon, and eggs had been devoured, my dad ushered us out front. Hooking up the hoses, I backed my dad's truck out into the driveway alongside my Explorer, and began rinsing the outermost layer of grime from it. Mary Jane started in on my dad's Toyota.

I was just spraying my back window, when I suddenly found myself soaked. Pausing, I turned to see a smiling blonde with the smoking gun in her hand; or dripping hose, in this case. I raised an eyebrow at her, and just as her smile began to fade, and I could tell she was thinking I was really upset, I grinned and hit her in the stomach with a blast of water.

Soon, moments later, we were both sopping wet and laughing hysterically.

Remember what I said about how I'd never forget the first time Mary Jane was able to joke around with me? I was right. That jet of water didn't just start a water fight; it opened the door to Mary Jane's very heart. For her to be comfortable enough to initiate such a playful gesture pleased me to no end.

Reaching for the young woman, I drew her into a strong hug, and quickly kissed the top of her head.

"That was great, MJ," I laughed.

"It was fun," she agreed, and I locked the sound of her laughter into my heart, where it remains presently, clear as day.

When both vehicles were clean, I offered to take her out to the movies, just because. At first she seemed surprised, but then she agreed, and I told my dad the plan after we'd changed into dry clothes.

"What are you going to go see?" he asked, casually, examining the shiny truck in our driveway, pleased with our work.

I glanced at Mary Jane, and she looked just as clueless as I felt. I shrugged. "I don't know, we'll probably just drive by and see what looks good," I replied, and my dad nodded.

"Okay. Well, thank you for washing my truck, Mary Jane - you did a great job!" he grinned, and I gave him a mock pout. "Oh, Doc, your car looks great, too," he laughed, and I grinned. "Have a good time at the movies, girls, and I'll see you later."

We ended up watching Legally Blonde with Reese Witherspoon. It was a pretty good movie; funny, but with some serious parts thrown it. And it was based on a book, as most movies had been lately, so I was happy. There was even a self-proclaimed lesbian character in it, which made for an interesting scene.

All in all, we had fun, but the best part of the movie had to be when I found myself holding Mary Jane's hand. Yep, that was by far the best moment. We were sitting in the back, and there was no one around us, so I wasn't too worried about anyone noticing, which was nice. I wanted to do that all the time, and it was hard to remember that I couldn't take her hand when we were out in public. Not everyone would understand.

"That was a pretty good movie," I commented, and Mary Jane agreed.

"Thank you, Bugs," she smiled, and I grinned widely at the name. "I had fun today."

Well, if my girlfriend liked the movies, then the movies we would do. It became a tradition; every weekend when Damon would go out to his friend's house, Mary Jane would come over on Sunday and we'd go see a movie. For the next three weeks I found myself looking forward to every day of school, because it meant I got to see Mary Jane and eat lunch with her. We were more careful now to make sure she didn't get in trouble - when her brother drove around I would get up and sit at a nearby table for a moment, before coming back to join her. The weekends meant we had the chance to go out together, and I could take her away from her home life for a while. I was happier than I'd been in a long time.

Despite the fact that Mr. Heath was still being a jerk, giving me strange looks in the halls, and the real stalker hadn't been caught yet. It seemed as though numerous crimes were suddenly popping up around our town; the stalker, bank robbers, car thieves… the rumors of embezzlement in several businesses that had been going around were forgotten.

Luckily, Mary Jane had promised to tell me if Damon got angry with her for anything we did, and she said he hadn't said a word about her 'turning' lately. I guess he thought he was succeeding, and while that didn't please me, she didn't seem to be coming to school with anymore visible bruises, so that was good.

Andrew was still being his same old self, however. He had a bad habit of catching me just before I went to sit with Mary Jane at lunch, and if I didn't see him then, I was sure to see him after school. He had a thing about bothering me, and one day in particular really made me upset.

"Oh, Bailey, look what I've got," sang Andrew, as I was walking down the hallway during passing period, trying to make my way to Mary Jane's class so I could walk with her, and I glanced up to see him waving two tickets in his hand. "Two tickets to the movies!"

I smiled sweetly, and swiftly grabbed them both from his grasp. "Why, Andrew, you shouldn't have," I grinned, and the boy glared at me, taking them back.

"They're not for you, Smith. I need to know where Mary Jane is - she has to go with me, now that I've bought the tickets!" he rationalized, and I sighed.

"Come off it, Turnkey."

"I know you guys are friends, so tell me where she is!" he insisted.

I shook my head. "I don't know," I lied.

Andrew's smile turned into a sneer. "Come on, Bailey, this may be my only chance to get her in my car," he explained. "Once I do that, she's mine for the taking!"

"Forget it, Andrew. I won't let Mary Jane go anywhere with you alone."

"You've got to help me out here…" he pleaded, suddenly desperate. "If you won't let her go alone, does that mean you're going, too? I can always take you both. In more ways than one, you know." He brought his hand up to his lips and wiggled his tongue through his fingers, as I fought the urge to rip the damned thing out of his mouth. I was sure it was forked at some point.

"In your dreams, ass hole."

He grinned. "Exactly." I rolled my eyes. "I can find an extra ticket if you change your mind…"

"Leave Mary Jane alone, Andrew. You mess with her and you mess with me, got it?" I snarled. "Unless you want to be breathing through a ventilator tube or traveling in a wheelchair for the rest of your life, you'll back off."

The jerk was quiet for too long, before giving me a sickening smile. "Absolutely, Bailey. Got it," he cooed, walking away, leaving me feeling angry and worried, not to mention disgusted.

I ran into Mary Jane not long afterwards, and I could tell she was excited about something just by the way she greeted me.

"Bailey! What are you doing tonight?" she asked, and I took a moment to think about it.

"I have my Karate class, why?"

She paused. "You know that awards ceremony?" I nodded. "Are you going?"

I shrugged. "I wasn't planning on it. I figure they'll just give me anything tomorrow in class, anyhow," was my response, and I kicked myself when I saw her face fall. Why did I have to speak before I thought? Why?

"Oh. Okay."

"Why, MJ, are you up for something?" I questioned, but she shook her head.

"No, that's okay."

I frowned. "MJ…" I sighed, gently taking her chin in my hands, but she looked away. I let my hands fall to my sides, a bit hurt by the rejection. "I haven't missed a single class, ever. Even when I was sick I managed to go," I continued, evenly.

"I understand, Bailey," she said, quietly. The bell rang, and she turned to leave. "Have a good class," the blonde murmured, walking down the hall.

I felt horrible as I watched her go. Damn it! Now she was upset, and it was all my fault! But, still, I'd made a commitment to Karate, and it was one I had to keep. I mean, a ceremony that wasn't mandatory was no reason to miss class…

I kept that mindset most of the night, and although it was hard, I found myself placing my gym bag in the passenger seat and driving towards the dojo. I had to force myself to keep going, but even though my physical self was going to class, my mind was refuting the choice.

Why am I doing this? Why don't I just turn around and go to the ceremony? I asked myself, angrily. What's one class? I can make it up, and if I get in trouble for it, so what? This is Mary Jane we're talking about, and it's not as if she has a family to support her.

That's it! The thought hit me in an instant. If I don't go, she'll really be crushed - no one will be there for her. Well, that's not going to happen!

It took me all of two seconds to make my decision. Signaling, I moved into the left lane, made a u-turn, and headed for the high school. I had a very important young woman to cheer for, after all, and I'd be damned if I was going to let her stand up on that stage in front of hundreds of people and still feel alone.

Sensei Moorland would understand. She'd have to. Mary Jane was a much more important commitment than any class; it had just taken me a little while to really understand that.

I arrived at the school in about ten minutes, and prayed I wasn't too late. Rushing inside, I quietly found a seat near the center aisle of the auditorium, and glanced around for Mary Jane. I didn't see her, but I knew she'd be called for something.

"And now, the Language Arts Award," announced our vice principal, and began giving a little background on the award. "This is an award that is only given to four students out of each class, and in fact, one of this year's winners has received this award for three consecutive years now. First up, Mary Jane Wilcox."

While everyone applauded politely, I had to cross my ankles so I wouldn't jump to my feet. Watching her walk up there and shake the man's hand… I was proud. I was very proud. Standing up on stage, certificate in her hand, she waited patiently for the other names to be called, and, out of the hundreds of people there, she managed to see me. I gave her as big a grin as I could manage, and a thumbs-up. She smiled, and I could've sworn I noticed her biting her lip - was she crying?

Uh-oh. Tears weren't good.

She also received the school's art award, and this time I couldn't help it. It was the last award of the night, and I started a standing ovation. Okay, so I was one of a few people standing, but hey, it's the thought, right?

The blonde still had that look in her eyes, so I was quick to lead her out the back and to my car, where we could talk.

"MJ, what's wrong?" I asked, concerned by the tears pooling in her eyes. "Talk to me, please."

"You came," she said, and I nodded, with a small grin.

"Well, I couldn't let the best girl in school go up there without a cheering section, now could I?" I replied gently, and she choked back a sob as she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Hey…" I soothed, holding her tightly. "You want to tell me what this is all about? You should be happy, you did so well! I'm proud of you!"

She sniffled, and wiped at her eyes. "No one's ever come to anything like this for me," she admitted, quietly. "I thought you had Karate practice."

"You're more important," I answered, instantly. "I'm just sorry it took me so long to realize that fact. But, I do believe congratulations are in order!" I announced, trying to lighten the mood, and took it upon myself to properly examine the crisp certificates. In just a few minutes, I had her smiling again, and offered to take her home, but she shook her head.

"Damon should be here in about twenty minutes," she informed me, and I stiffened at the name. "He said he'd pick me up after his TV show was over."

I sighed. "Can I stay with you until he comes, then?" I asked, and the blonde nodded, happily accepting my second offer. We talked and cuddled for a little while, and I began to feel thankful that I'd parked under a dim street light that didn't shine through my tinted windows, when Mary Jane said she'd better get outside before her brother showed up and saw her climbing out of my car.

"I'll stay until you leave," I promised, and she tried to talk me out of it, but I told her I wanted to make sure she wasn't waiting too long. If he didn't show up, I didn't want her standing outside all night.

"Bailey?" she called, just before she closed the door.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for coming. It really meant a lot to me."

I smiled. "I'm glad I could be here, MJ," I replied, and she softly closed the passenger door, walking a few yards away to wait for her brother to pull up.

Sure enough, about ten minutes later, a beat up blue Honda Civic came tearing into the parking lot, coming to a screeching halt just before Mary Jane. I was glad most of the other people had left, so there wasn't an accident. Climbing inside, I watched as she handed her brother the certificates she'd earned, and he carelessly threw them into the backseat without so much as a glance at them.

My eyes narrowed, and I had to buckle my seat belt so I didn't walk over there and beat the living shit out of the creep.

She earned those, goddamn it, I thought, angrily. She worked hard to get those awards… how dare you just toss them away like they mean nothing? I'd be picking out frames and praising her, not stomping out her hopes and dreams, you son of a bitch. One of these days, Mary Jane, I'm going to get you out of there. I promise.

One of these days…

Sunday morning I got up to help my dad in the garage, but he told me to relax. I argued with him for a moment, since I felt like I needed to help him - it was my vehicle he was working on after all, but he wouldn't let me.

"Just take the day off, Doc," he insisted.

"Dad…"

"Come on, humor me, Bailey. I know you had a heavy load of work this week, and you took off yesterday so you could rest, but instead you helped me outside. I don't want you working here at home today," was his explanation, and I sighed, but gave in. He was right; I'd stayed late every night to help Jerry, since Patrick was on vacation, so it had been an especially long week of work for me, and I'd asked for Saturday off to rest, only to give my dad a little help on a customer's van.

I grinned. "Thanks." I was returning to my room to maybe get a little writing in, since Mary Jane had called the night before to say she wouldn't be able to go to the movies because her brother insisted that she had to do some work on the computer for him, when there was a knock on the door. Not caring that I was only clad in my boxers and a sports bra, I opened it, only to find my best friend standing on my doorstep.

"Tina!" I exclaimed, giving her a quick hug. "What's wrong?" I asked, when the gesture wasn't returned as enthusiastically as normal.

"Sit down."

I frowned, but invited her in, and sat on the couch as I was told.

"I need to tell you something, Bailey. It's about Mary Jane."

My heart pounded. "Is she okay? God, Tina, is she hurt?" I demanded, scared out of my mind that something had happened.

"No, she's not hurt," she assured me, and I reminded myself to breathe. "She's anything but hurt."

Then I noticed what was different about my friend's mood - the brunette was angry. No, not just angry; totally pissed off. Her eyes were smoldering, and I wondered what could have possibly set my typically cheerful friend off in such a tizzy.

"Tina, what's going on?"

"I just came from the park…"

"And?" I was getting impatient. Tina knew something concerning my girlfriend that I didn't, and it was something that made her mad… I wanted to know what it was!

"I saw Mary Jane… I'm sorry, Bailey, but she was all over some guy."

I swallowed. "What?" I asked, my throat suddenly dry enough to make me have to repeat myself. "What did you say?"

"She was hanging all over this buff blonde guy."

I refused to believe that Mary Jane would cheat on me. "It was probably her brother," I decided. "He makes her do a bunch of sick shit, and she told me he had some stuff he wanted her to do today, which is why she couldn't go to the movies with me."

She looked at me, seriously. "I thought you said he had dark hair - this guy was a very muscular blonde. He could have been a surfer," she added, and I felt my heart sink. That didn't describe Damon at all.

"Listen, Mary Jane wouldn't do that!" I cried, getting to my feet. "I don't know what you thought you saw, Tina, but…"

"Then come with me!" she countered. "They're probably still there."

"Let me throw a pair of jeans on," I requested, and bolted to my room to get dressed. "You'll see, Tina, I'm going to prove you wrong!" I called, as I quickly grabbed my socks and shoes, slipping a shirt over my head as I walked back down the hall.

"I hope you do, my friend," she muttered, telling my dad she was kidnapping me for a minute and we'd be back in a little while. "I sincerely hope you do."

Tina drove, and we arrived at the park in just a few minutes, my blue eyes quickly scanning the people in the grassy area.

"There," she said, pointing towards a few benches placed under a group of trees not far from the playground. "That's where they were when I left."

For the first time in my life, I swear my body was betraying me. My eyes were showing me something that couldn't possibly be true. They told me that Mary Jane was standing next to a tall blonde man, her arm around his waist, laughing occasionally at something her brother or the surfer guy would say, clutching at his hand as though it were the only thing that mattered. According to my eyes, my girlfriend was happily hanging all over this guy, smiling brightly when he kissed her cheek and giggling when he picked her up in his arms for a moment.

I felt sick, and closed my eyes. They were lying to me, anyhow, and my heart was a traitor to have let me fall in love with someone who would only hurt me.

"Hey, Bailey…"

"Take me home, Tina. Please, take me home," I pleaded, quietly, and my friend agreed silently. Pulling away from the curb, I leaned my head back in the seat, and took deep breaths to keep my breakfast where it was.

When we pulled into my driveway, I rushed into the house and headed for the bathroom, kneeling by the toilet in case I was really sick like my stomach was threatening.

"Oh, God…" I moaned as I felt the tears run down my face.

My dad knocked on the door. "Bailey?"

I heard Tina urge him away. "Let me take of her, Darryl. Please, she'll tell you if she's ready," she said, softly, and then she entered the bathroom a few seconds later.

"Bailey, are you all right?"

I shook my head, and leaned into my friend as she put her arms around me, crying into her shoulder like I hadn't done since my mom died. She was there for me that night, too, holding me tightly as I sobbed, having just found out the news from my devastated father, her own parents coming to comfort my dad.

Just like when I lost my mom, I felt like nothing could be worse. There was nothing that could make me feel as bad as I was at that time… the woman that meant everything to me was gone.

"Why, Tina? Why would she do that?"

"I don't know, honey," she soothed, brushing my hair back from my face for me. I was too broken to do anything at the moment… that's the only way to explain how I felt: broken. I felt as though my whole world had been taken away from me in a split second, and there was no way I could get it back.

"But I will hurt her myself because of it."

I shook my head. "No, Tina," I whispered. "Don't. I'll have to talk to her myself… and I will," I decided. "I just don't know how I'm going to do it."

Tina stayed the night, going so far as to sleep in my bed like we did when we were little, letting me sleep with my head on her chest as she cradled me. She didn't even say anything when I angrily threw a pillow at my radio, as it began to play our song… she just pulled me closer.

There really was nothing sexual about it - she was straight, I was gay, and neither one of us had ever felt anything more than friendship towards each other. It just felt good to be comforted by someone in my life I knew I could depend on, and while my dad tried, he finally got the message that I didn't want to talk about it yet, but I knew he was there for me. They both were.

Had you asked me the day before, I would have mentioned Mary Jane in that list, but after what I'd seen…

She left the next morning just as I was walking out the door for school, and gave me one last long hug in front of her car.

"Call me later, okay, Bailey?"

I nodded. "Thanks, Tina. I really appreciate you staying. I know I wasn't much company, but…"

She cut me off. "Hey, I always have a good time with you, Hot Stuff," she joked, and kissed my cheek. "Take care."

I must have been a pitiful sight as I walked into school that morning… my eyes were still red from crying in the car before the bell rang, and I knew I had to have circles under them from staying up most of the night. I felt like shit, and I'm sure I looked even worse.

But I dreaded having to face Mary Jane at lunch. When the bell rang and I started walking in that direction, I felt my heart pound painfully against my chest when the small blonde smiled up at me, and I recalled how she'd done the same to the guy at the park. She looked at him the same way she looked at me…

God, I was going to be sick again.

I sank down beside her with a heavy sigh, putting my head in my hands.

"Bailey?" she asked, concerned, and reached out to touch my shoulder.

I looked up quickly, pinning her with a glare that made her freeze, and she returned her hand to her side.

"Where were you yesterday?" I demanded.

"At the park."

"With who?" The look in her eyes told me she suddenly realized what was going on. She knew I knew.

"Damon and some of his friends…"

"Were you… with any of them? A blonde guy?" I couldn't believe I was asking my girlfriend this… surely she'd tell me I was wrong, it was all a joke of some kind. Surely she hadn't cheated on me. I mean, this was Mary Jane I was talking to, after all. There had to be some sort of explanation… I still wanted to believe in her. God help me, even after all I'd seen, I didn't want to think of her as being anything other than perfect.

Time stopped when she nodded.

"Bailey…" she began.

I stood up quickly, tears in my eyes, my heart breaking and my voice cracking as I snarled, "Fuck you. Just stay the hell away from me." I hurried through the halls, glad I knew the way by heart, since I couldn't see for the tears. Racing to my car, I simply sat there and cried, allowing myself to pound on the back of my seat in my anger.

I had to commend myself for not striking her, but when she confirmed my suspicions, I was too hurt to think about hitting her. All I knew was the pain, and the betrayal. I felt very betrayed…

You forget, Bailey, she's an actress - she has to be, to live with her brother, my mind recalled. It was probably all just an act on her part.

"But, damn it, I wasn't acting," I said, aloud. "I meant it all… how could someone I love so much hurt me so bad?"

It seemed as though the moment I didn't want to see her, she started appearing everywhere. I saw her during passing period, as I walked to my car, at work… I was trying to avoid her, to save myself a small amount of pain, but it wasn't working.

And she didn't want to let me alone, either. She kept calling my house, but when I'd pick up and hear her voice, I'd hang up. We went on like that all week. I'd try to stay away from her, but if I did see her, I'd only send her the worst look I could muster and walk in the other direction, completely missing the hurt I was causing. When she'd call I'd hang up on her, and eventually I just stopped answering the phone altogether.

I hadn't told my dad, yet, and I wasn't sure quite what to tell him, besides. I knew he'd be upset, and I didn't want to do that. Plus, I didn't want to have to relive the emotions and images any more often than I did already… every time I closed my eyes I saw her with the guy, laughing and kissing. And every time I felt that surge of pain in my heart.

On Saturday afternoon, one week after the day I realized my heart was a traitor, I was sitting on the couch doing my homework when the phone rang. I glanced at my dad, telling him I wasn't about to pick it up, so he grabbed the call.

"Doc, it's Mary Jane," he said, a few moments later, and I didn't even glance up from my textbook.

"Hang up."

"She's crying."

"I don't give a flying fuck," I spat, angrily, not caring for the time that I was cursing heavily in front of my father. "Hang up the goddamn phone."

"She says something about how you told her to call if he ever did it again…"

I froze. She was making good on her promise to call me… I'd told her I'd always be there for her, all she'd have to do was call…

Well, none of that mattered now. She'd hurt me terribly, so what the hell did I care what happened to her?

"Hang up," I repeated, hoarsely, and flew into my room.

By dusk I couldn't take it anymore. I told my dad I was going out and drove down the road to Mary Jane's house, convincing myself all along of why I was doing it.

I don't really give a fuck what happens to her, for the most part, but no one should have to live with that, I decided. I was still too hurt and angry to let my traitorous heart tell me I still cared for her, but that didn't mean I couldn't be human. I wouldn't wish that kind of life on my worst enemy…

She must have seen me pull up because she ran outside and climbed into the front seat before I could even get out of my seat belt.

"What happened?" I questioned, evenly, as though I didn't care.

"He just started saying some things… like I was stupid and would never amount to anything… and you told me to call you if he started that again," she explained. "But that's all he did."

"So you're really fine, then?"

"I… I also wanted to talk to you."

My jaw tensed. She was the last person I wanted to talk to at the moment.

"I didn't think you'd come," she continued, when I was quiet.

I sighed. "No one deserves to be subjected to that… even you," I stated, flatly.

My tone must have told her I was really ticked. "Bailey, I'm so sorry!" she cried.

"You certainly didn't look sorry at the park with that guy," I spat.

Damn. She was crying again. "Please, let me explain… I didn't want to be with him, Bailey, but I had to. Damon said if I didn't that he'd know for sure that I was with you, since he'd seen us together, and then he'd hurt you. I couldn't let that happen."

"So you decided to rip out my heart instead?" Oops. I didn't mean for her to know how bad it had hurt. Too late.

She was sobbing, now. "Oh, Bugs, I'm sorry."

"Don't call me that," I ordered. Somebody I loved used to call me that. I wanted to say it, but I didn't. We had never talked about love, and it sure wouldn't do any good to talk about something that could no longer be.

"What I don't understand is why you couldn't just tell me, instead of canceling our movie date to go be with some ass at the park. Why couldn't you have said you didn't want to be with me anymore?"

"Because it's not true!"

I rolled my eyes. "I know what I saw, Mary Jane; you were all over that jerk," I reminded her. "Or were you just acting?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I was only pretending!"

"So how do I know you weren't pretending with me, then?" I roared. "How do I know it all wasn't some fucking act for you?"

"I'm sorry that's what you think," she said, softly. "I thought you knew I trusted you… I did, Bailey."

"And I thought I could trust you," I countered. "But I was wrong." There was silence for a while, and then I took a deep breath. "Look, I won't send you back in there since he knows you've been in here talking to me. You can stay at my house tonight and I'll take you back in the morning."

Without giving her a chance to respond, I drove back home, walking inside without waiting to see if she'd follow. She did, and I threw an old T-shirt of mine on my bed, making sure it was not my Bugs Bunny shirt… I couldn't handle seeing her in that.

"Here," I gestured. "You can sleep in that."

"Good night, Bailey," she whispered, gently, but I just kept walking. Once I was sure she was in my room, and couldn't hear me, I sank into the couch and sobbed into my pillow until I fell asleep. Just thinking about her wearing my Bugs Bunny shirt was enough to remind me of the good times we'd had and the feelings I thought we'd shared…

Too much hurt and conflicting feelings for one day, I fell into an exhausted sleep, only to be awakened a few hours later by my dog.

"Soda, what do you want?" I sighed, as the pup licked my face. Getting up, I went to let him out into the backyard, thinking perhaps his doggie door was blocked, but he just sat down and stared at me, whining.

"What, you don't want to go out? Then leave me alone." I was heading back to the couch when he ran into the back of my legs, making me stumble. "Sodapop!" I scolded, and he merely nudged me again, starting down the hall, stopping and looking back as if to ask if I was coming.

"For crying out loud…" I muttered, and followed my dog into my room, where Mary Jane was having a nightmare. The small blonde was tossing and turning under the covers, looking very vulnerable and sounding very afraid.

I felt my lip twitch as I steeled myself not to care. "No, Soda, it's her problem now," I decided, but couldn't bring myself to leave the room.

"Damn it," I swore, as I gave in and made my way to her side. Still, I tried to distance myself as much as possible. "Mary Jane," I spoke, standing over her. "Mary Jane, it's just a dream."

When that didn't work, I put my hand on her shoulder, consciously keeping it still, refusing to let my thumb stroke her skin or my fingers lightly feel the fabric of her shirt. I didn't love her… not after what she'd done, or so I told myself, and I was doing everything in my power not to let my heart get drawn into that trap again.

Gently squeezing her shoulder, she awoke, and her eyes met mine, showing me just how afraid she had been.

"It was a nightmare," I stated, and decided I would leave now that she was awake, but found myself held by two frantic arms that had suddenly been thrown around my waist. Pulling me close, she lightly cried into my shirt, and I cruelly removed her grip.

"Don't," I hissed. "It was a nightmare, you're fine. Go back to sleep."

"Bailey?" her voice was small as she spoke my name to my retreating back. "Will you stay with me? I… I won't touch you if you don't want, but, please, stay with me."

I growled. I didn't want to accept her request, but my heart was paying more attention to the gentle sound of her voice than the hurt she'd caused me just a week before. Pulling out the chair by my desk, I spun it around and sat down, pointedly meeting her gaze so she'd know that was as much as I planned to do.

"Thank you," she voiced, and lay back down, asleep quickly.

I, on the other hand, was wide-awake. I sat there, staring at her… God, all I wanted to do was touch her and kiss her and let myself indulge one last time on all the things I was missing, but I knew it'd only lead to more hurt. Moving closer, I sat down on the edge of the bed, and remembered all the times she'd laughed or smiled and it had just brightened my whole day. I remembered our first kiss, getting sprayed with the water hose, being able to see her walk up on stage and accept the awards she'd worked so hard to earn… those were the times that I thought my heart couldn't hold any more happiness.

Focusing on those good feelings, I found myself wanting to kiss her… badly. Leaning down, I was a breath away from her lips when she stirred, and turned towards me, throwing her arm over my lap.

Raising an eyebrow at our position, I decided to allow myself one last moment of happiness. I would just wake up before she did, and she'd never know I fell asleep beside her. That way I could hold her in my arms for the last time.

Sliding in beside her, I was careful not to wake her, and had to fight back the tears when she automatically sought out my shoulder as a pillow. Wrapping my arms around her, I pulled her close, and held her as I cried silent tears, knowing this would be the final time I would ever know the feeling of her in my arms.

I awoke the next morning to find a pair of green orbs staring at me.

"Damn," I cursed, realizing that Mary Jane and I were still locked in our embrace, my leg in fact lying over her own.

I began to disentangle myself from her grasp, but she tugged on my hand. "Bailey, what's wrong?"

I was disgusted with myself for letting her know what I'd done. "Just let me up," I said, firmly. "I didn't mean for this to happen."

"What do I have to do to prove to you how sorry I am?" she questioned. "What can I do that will make you believe I was never acting around you?"

I looked away. "You can't."

And then she kissed me. Softly at first, as if making sure I would allow it, and while I did grow a bit rigid at first, I eventually let my pounding heart take over and I melted into the kiss, beginning to lightly return the caress. Then she became a bit more insistent, not pulling back until we both needed air, leaving me breathless and my head spinning from the passionate kiss.

"Please believe me," she requested, quietly, kissing me quickly once more. "Damon told me I had to go with him and his friends or he'd hurt you… I was only acting, Bailey, I swear it."

I sighed. "But how do I know you're not acting with me?" I questioned, the hurt evident in my voice. "How do I know for sure that you really want to be with me?"

She tilted her head at me, gently. "Because I trust you, Bailey," she said, simply. "I… It's been a long time since I've been able to trust anyone. I am more myself around you than anyone, and I think you know that… I hope you know that," she added. "No one else sees that side of me because I'm not comfortable enough. But I feel safe with you, Bailey. I don't know exactly how I can prove it to you, but I don't want this to ruin us - please, give us another chance."

I took a deep breath, and slid out from underneath her. "I have some things I need to think about," I told her. "Breakfast will be ready in a few." With that, I left her in my room, walking out to the kitchen, thinking about what she'd said. I wanted to believe her… God, I wanted to trust her like I'd never wanted anything before in my life, but it was so hard! I couldn't get over the image of her with that guy.

"Bailey?"

Jesus, I didn't know she'd followed me! Spinning around, I found her standing in the kitchen, barefoot, still wearing the long T-shirt I'd given her the night before.

"What?" I asked.

"I think I know a way to prove it to you."

"How's that?"

"Get dressed and take me home."

I was stunned. "What?"

"Come on… it'll only take about five minutes," she urged, and turned around to get dressed herself.

Shaking my head, and wondering what on earth she had in mind, I pulled on a pair of jeans over my boxers and left my old T-shirt on, the one with a bunch of grease stains all over it. I figured we weren't going out anywhere, if I had any say in it, so it didn't really matter what I looked like.

She walked out of my room a few minutes later, as I was tying my shoes, and announced she was ready to go. Shrugging, I left a note for my dad, and we climbed into my Explorer.

"Wait here, I'll be out in just a second," she said, when we pulled up, and I sighed as I waited impatiently for her to return. I had no clue what she was doing, I only hoped Damon wasn't home to intercept her.

The blonde returned a few moments later with a small book, and she handed it to me. "It's my diary, Bailey."

I froze, shocked. "Mary Jane, these are your private thoughts," I began. "I can't read them."

She gave me a pleading look. "Just read the entry dated last Saturday… please."

Feeling extremely guilty, although she was asking me to do it, I did as I was told, and flipped to the page dated May 3rd…

Dear Diary,

It looks like D wants me to go out with more of his friends tomorrow… that means I have to cancel my date with Bugs! I really hate doing that… we have so much fun together, and she lets me really be me. I'm not afraid to laugh when I'm around her, or speak what I'm feeling. I trust her, and I know she won't get mad.

Did I tell you that she went to the Awards Ceremony? I still can't believe she came! I cried when I saw her sitting there… I knew she was there for me. She is so sweet when it comes to things like that. I wish I could tell her why I can't make our date, but I know she'd only get upset… and D said I couldn't tell, besides.

He wants to set me up with another one of his friends… a Clark this time, I believe. I only go along with it because I know it's what he wants and it means nothing to me, but now it's different… with Bugs in my life, I feel like I'm cheating on her! God, I don't want to hurt her, but if I tell D can't go, he'll know that something is up. And if he finds out I'm with Bugs, I won't be the only one in trouble!

Well, I'd guess I'd better call her… D is only going to be gone for another few minutes. Please forgive me, Bugs… I wish it were you. I want to be with you tomorrow, no one else.

Maybe someday I'll be able to tell her what really went on…

More when I can,

MJ (I love it when Bugs calls me that!)

I closed the book slowly. When I glanced up at her, I had tears in my eyes.

"He really made you be with him," I stated, and she nodded, obviously waiting to see if I'd believe it. It was just too personal to be made up, I thought. There was no way she would lie in her diary.

"I'm so sorry, MJ," I said, and gave her back her diary. "Can you forgive me?"

With a relieved smile, she fell into my arms, and happily returned my hug. "If you can forgive me… I didn't want to do it, Bailey!" she insisted, and I nodded.

"I know. I know that, now," I assured her, stroking her hair as I kissed her cheek. "I'm sorry I doubted you. How about we head back, okay? I've still got to fix breakfast and then maybe we can do a little more talking."

We spent the rest of the day sitting on a bench in the park, having taken Soda for a walk, letting him run as we talked about everything that had happened. We both apologized, me more than her, and forgave each other. I promised to let her explain the next time, and she said she'd do her best to tell me what was going on.

I took her home later that afternoon, when she said she was expecting Damon to return in an hour or so, and made sure to give her one long kiss before she left.

"I'll see you at lunch tomorrow," I smiled, and she nodded.

"I look forward to it, Bugs." There she paused. "Can I call you that?"

I swallowed, feeling bad that she had to ask for permission to call me by my nickname. "I would love it, MJ," I told her, honestly, and we exchanged one more kiss before she walked into the house.

Continued in Part 3.