~ Guardian Angel ~
by D
avaliantheart01@gmail.com

Disclaimer: These characters and this narrative are mine, so there is nothing to disclaim in this here story. Besides, if you are still reading my stuff, you already know the drill - you will need an open mind to read it. If you find something you think needs disclaiming, you are more than welcome to let me know. It won't change anything, but it may make you feel better. Ugliness will earn you a smack to the back of your head.

Thanks: To my truly awesome Beta Team - Phil, Mac and Jeanne - they have certainly gone above and beyond for this story... 26 months of reading for mistakes. There was a point when I know each of you thought it was never going to end... because I wondered the same thing . Thanks, ya'll... this would have been much more difficult process without your efforts. You guys ROCK!

Author's Notes: So, it did actually take 26 months of writing to complete this sucker, and it's so much more than I ever envisioned it would be… because I certainly never expected it to be almost 700 pages when all was said and done. Still, I think it was worth the effort - we ended up with a good solid story and some great characters. And who knows? We may see them again someday.

The Storyteller's Cardinal Rule is in effect.


-- Part 2 --

Chapter LX

Charisma watched Kay leave and took a deep breath, then she headed out the other door of the dining room and down the hall to the playroom where the men and the children were currently entertaining each other. She leaned against the doorjamb and simply watched the activity for a moment.

For the most part, the men were gathered around in a big circle talking - news, sports, jobs and occasionally making a comment directed to one child or another - while still keeping an eye on the various activities taking place throughout the room.

The kids had mostly broken down into groups by age and temperament, and Charisma was pleased to see that Adam fit in well with his cousins and their friends even though he was most definitely the youngest among them. Harley, Hunter's oldest, was keeping a special eye out for him, but the rest didn't just dismiss him because he was so young.

At the moment, he was sitting in front of Harley between his legs and playing some sort of racing game on the big screen television. Adam's squeals of excitement made Charisma smile and forget everything but his joy. When a girl she didn't recognize - obviously one of Kay's children - came and sat down next to them, Adam offered her the controller, but she smiled at him and shook her head. Instead she pointed out something on the screen, and Adam nodded his head frantically, before trying to do whatever it was that the older girl had shown him.

Renee, Rocky's middle child and one of the twins, got up from her place on the floor where several of the children were involved in building... something. When she saw Charisma lounging in the doorway, she squealed and ran over to hug her. Charisma smiled and returned the hug fervently, feeling better from the unabashed adoration in Renee's eyes.

"Hey, Sweetie," she said as she straightened, brushing a lock of hair from blue eyes. "What are you guys building?" motioning to the mass of blocks on the floor and ignoring the raised eyebrow looks she was getting from the other adults in the room. As a rule, the girls stayed in the kitchen until dinner was called - the boys went in after dinner to take care of the clean-up. Mostly they didn't cross paths too much until dinner was finished. So seeing Charisma here now set off more than one alarm bell.

"Everything all right, Princess?" Patrick asked when all the adult eyes turned to him. Charisma nodded her head, but kept her eyes on the Legos taking up one huge corner of the room that Renee had led her to.

"Everything's fine, Daddy. I got the table set and realized I hadn't even gotten a hello from some of my nieces and nephews, so I thought I'd come rectify that oversight posthaste."

"You talk funny," offered another kid she didn't know, and she raised an eyebrow at his outspokenness. Then Renee punched him in the arm, and the boy glared at her. "What'd ya do that for? She does talk funny... like a teacher or somethin'."

"Aunt Chari isn't a teacher - she's a Senator. She makes laws and stuff."

The boy's eyes widened and he looked at her with awe. "Do you really?"

Charisma smiled and nodded, liking the kid in spite of herself. "I do indeed... at least sometimes."

"Good!" the boy nodded fervently. "Can you make a law that says I don't always have to be nice to my sisters?"

Charisma took a seat on the floor and reached for a few of the blocks closest to her, carefully putting them together as she considered her answer. "Well, I don't know...." looking at him and then glancing at Renee with a raised eyebrow.

"This is Robert." Charisma nodded her thanks.

"I don't know, Robert. Wouldn't the world be a much better place if we were all nicer to each other?"

He sighed. "I s'pose so. But they drive me crazy," rolling his eyes and shaking his head wildly. Renee laughed and Charisma chuckled. "Always wanting to play my games and stuff," giving a long-suffering sigh. "And Mom makes me share."

"Well, I'll share a secret with you, Robert - brothers and sisters drive each other crazy. But you do learn to appreciate them as you get older. Who knows... you may even end up liking them at some point." Robert looked at Charisma like she'd just grown two heads. She simply smirked and tousled his hair before she handed Renee her completed Lego figure.

"Wow! Thanks, Aunt Chari."

"Anytime, Sweetie. Now I need to get back to the kitchen before Gramma decides I've absconded to warmer territory." Renee wrapped an arm around Charisma and got another hug before Charisma rose and moved away from them towards Harley and Adam.

"I'm telling you, Rennie - she talks funny... not like real people," Robert whispered loudly.

"Robert," Renee groaned dramatically, drawing snickers from the adults scattered around the room. Charisma stopped beside her oldest nephew and put a hand on his shoulder. "Everything all right, Harley? Adam's not too much trouble, is he?"

"Mama! Adam good boy!" Adam insisted, scowling at her. "Love Harley."

Harley blushed, but met Charisma's eyes squarely. "Adam's fine, Aunt Chari. Mich and I were just giving him some driving pointers."

"Mich?"

The girl beside him turned to Charisma and held out her hand. "Hi, Senator Tagherty. I'm Michelle Williams."

"Charisma Tagherty," Charisma responded automatically, accepting the girl's hand and shaking it briefly. "It's nice to meet you, Ms Williams."

"You can call me Michelle, you know. I'm not a Senator yet."

"Do you have political aspirations, Michelle?"

"I would like to be the first female President," she stated unequivocally. "But for now I'm happy to be my class president." She shrugged. "We all have to start somewhere, right?"

Charisma smiled. "You're absolutely right - we do." She hesitated, then plunged ahead, hoping she wasn't cutting off her nose to spite her face. "Look, if you're really interested in politics, maybe you could come clerk for me one summer when you get a little older. It would give you a taste of what politics is really like."

Charisma watched Michelle's eyes light up with enthusiasm and wistfully remembered when she'd felt the same way. "Really? Oh, thank you Senator Tagherty. I'd like that... I'd like that a lot."

"Aunt Chari, if you've finished charming my girlfriend, could I have her back now? Adam and I need her to finish this race."

"Harley!" Michelle exclaimed with embarrassment, slapping him on the shoulder. Charisma just chuckled.

"Remind me to get you a card after dinner, all right, Michelle?"

"Thank you, Senator Tagherty. Thank you so much."

Charisma just smiled and nodded her head before moving over to where four more children were working on a huge puzzle from four different sides. Each child stopped for a moment to speak to her, but mostly, they were too engrossed in trying to fit pieces in to give her more than cursory attention. Instead of interrupting the ones who were reading, she walked around the room and checked on them, smiling when each of them at least paused to say 'hi'.

When she reached the door, Patrick's voice stopped her again. "Satisfied, Little Girl?"

She smirked. "Yes, Daddy. Now let me go see how long until dinner." Then she disappeared down the hallway in the direction of the kitchen. The boys watched her go and Hunter and Patrick exchanged a significant glance. The rest turned back to the discussion... all except Kent. He followed Charisma into the hallway, catching her hand and pulling her to a stop.

Charisma cocked her head in his direction and gave him a half smile, though she left her hand in his. Kent squeezed it lightly, before releasing his grip. "Are you all right, Charisma? You've seemed off-balance since you got up this morning."

"Yes... I'm sorry, Kent. Not sleeping last night really threw me off."

"Anything I can help with?" wondering what had kept her up... especially since he was confident she'd been sleeping well enough until then, even with them being forced to share a bed.

She smiled at him and cupped his cheek briefly. "No. I just need to keep a closer watch on my caffeine intake, I think," removing her hand from his face.

Kent nodded. "I did the same thing the other night," he confided, "when Mama served that molten chocolate cake." He paused, and the silence grew awkward. He cleared his throat. "Speaking of... you'd better get to the kitchen before Mama comes looking for you."

She nodded. "Thanks, Kent." Then she headed back to the kitchen without looking back. Kent watched her go, wondering again what had upset her badly enough to put the pensive look on her face. With a sigh, he resolved to keep an eye on her. Then he returned to the playroom to wait with the rest to be called to the dinner table.

************

"So there really is a difference," Danielle commented softly when Esmeralda was done. "In how you perceive your relationship and how you treat it."

"I believe there is, yes," Esmeralda said softly.

"I'd be tempted to agree with you," Margaret agreed. "Especially given your penchant for studying human nature," her words causing those who'd missed the conversation that morning to look at her. "Don't look at me like that - she's probably a better observer than Kay," causing every eye in the room to turn towards Kay as she straightened up from her quiet conversation with Brianna. She smiled and cocked an eyebrow, sauntering over to join the other women in their discussion.

"That's quite a compliment, Margaret." She focused on Esmeralda. "May I ask what it is you do for a living, Esmeralda?"

Esmeralda met Kay's dark eyes directly. "I'm a custodian in Charisma's and Brianna's Senate Building. I take care of their floor, in point of fact."

"Have you always been a custodian?"

"Since I started working, yes."

Kay smiled kindly and looked around the room with interest. "Margaret is right. I may have the schooling and the knowledge, but Esmeralda has the experience." She turned back to Esmeralda again. "You could probably write a book."

"Again... no thank you. I actually like what I do."

"Order out of chaos," Kay murmured.

"Oh," Theresa moaned. "You must be an angel... or a miracle worker. If you were a freelancer, I'd hire you in a New York minute. - I could use some order in the chaos that having three boys under one roof is." She turned to Okasa. "And can you believe Hunter is talking about wanting another?"

Okasa smirked. "I hope you don't think I wouldn't encourage him. It would be nice to have more babies around here again."

"Not from me!" Theresa exclaimed, garnering laughter from everyone in the room. "My boys are closer to being out of the house than they are to being in diapers. I would prefer to let them and their cousins have the next round of babies in a few years."

"I'm not gonna disagree with Theresa, Mama... sorry," Danielle offered.

"Me either," Cindy piped up. "Sorry, Mama. You're going to be one shy of a dozen in the grandkids department unless Charisma decides to have another baby."

"Or Brianna could," Charisma volunteered as she crossed the threshold into the kitchen, glancing Brianna's way briefly before looking around at the women seated around the table and counter bar. "Because Charisma isn't having any more children. One's enough, thanks."

Her sisters-in-law exchanged rolled-eye glances, but didn't bother to argue the point. Instead, Cindy looked at Brianna. "What about it, Bri? Have you ever wanted kids?"

Brianna blinked and removed her stare from Charisma, wondering what she had seen in those blue depths. She turned her attention to Cindy and her question. "No... no thank you. You've all been kind enough to let me play 'Auntie' to all of yours and that's enough for me. I don't want to be responsible for someone who depends on me for everything twenty-four hours a day until they're grown. It's selfish, but I like my life... even as a temporary politician," she added with a smile, hoping to lighten the atmosphere just a little.

Okasa snorted. "Until they're grown?? Brianna, in case you haven't noticed," motioning around the room, "they still come home when they're grown and they bring more with them when they come," garnering smiles from the girls and a chuckle from Margaret and Kay. "The biggest difference is that at some point they all go back to their own homes until the next visit - which I cherish, by the way... both parts. It's a shame you don't want to be a mother, though - I think you'd make a great one. After all, you've got years of 'Auntie' practice under your belt."

"I miss not having children," Esmeralda offered into the silence and feeling Saphira come up behind her and wrapping her in strong arms. She leaned into Saphira's body and turned to Okasa. "Thank you for inviting us into your home today and allowing us to be a part of your holiday celebration. I can't tell you what it means to both of us to be included like this."

"I suppose now would be a good time to tell you that this is like a lifetime commitment in this family," Charisma said with a smile in her voice. "Just ask the girls - they came home with the boys once and now they're expected here every holiday AND for weekly dinners."

"Yes, but they're family," Saphira said. "We're just...."

"... family," Okasa assured them, reaching over the table to squeeze one of Saphira's hands that was still wrapped around Esmeralda's body. "You may not have been born into it and you may not have married into it, but I like to think that we can choose parts of our family as well. We chose Brianna, we chose Kay and now we're choosing you."

Blue and green eyes widened; Esmeralda tilted her head back and Saphira angled her head down until their glances could meet. The women in the room watched their silent conversation in awe, not surprised when tear-filled green eyes looked back at Okasa a long moment later.

"Thank you, Okasa... all of you," as she met the eyes of each woman in the kitchen. "We can't tell you what this means...."

"You don't have to," Brianna assured them both with a smile. "We know."

Saphira chuckled. "Yeah, I guess you do."

"Well," Okasa said, clearing her throat and beaming. "I think one of you needs to go tell Paddy it's time to carve the turkey," looking pointedly at Esmeralda and Saphira. Saphira tapped lightly on Esmeralda's belly.

"You go get Patrick. I'll sharpen the knife and help Okasa start serving up. I'm the professional, remember?"

"Just be careful not to sharpen it too much," Esmeralda cautioned as she slipped from Saphira's grip. "You know what happened the last time...." Saphira flushed when all eyes turned her way.

"That wasn't my fault," she muttered.

"Be that as it may, please do not give the knife a razor's edge. Not everyone is as proficient wielding a blade as you are."

"I kinda like to hear that story," Brianna said as Esmeralda exited the room to fetch Patrick.

"Me too," Charisma and Kay agreed together. Then Charisma continued alone. "However, I'm not going to ask the knife wielder to tell it. Family or not, I'm not that brave... or that reckless."

Brianna and Kay snorted and it wasn't long before their chuckles caused Charisma to break into laughter as well. The rest started asking for the joke, but they couldn't stop laughing long enough to reply, and looking at one another or Saphira only made them laugh harder. Saphira, who had heard every word, maintained a straight face and just kept sharpening.

It was to this scene that Esmeralda returned with a grinning Patrick in tow. He was thrilled that Okasa had made them officially part of the family. He looked around the kitchen full of cackling women and shook his head. After all, the family could use more laughter, right?

Then he crossed over to where the turkey was resting on the counter and accepted the blade from Saphira. The sooner he was done cutting, the sooner they could eat. And judging by the sharpness of the knife, Saphira knew her business. He nodded his thanks and started slicing, only pausing when he realized everyone had stopped and was watching him intently.

"All right, the lot of you - find something else to do. You're giving me performance anxiety!"

This caused another round of laughter, but several of them took his words to heart and started moving food to the dining room, while the remainder went to round up husbands and children to wash up for the meal. It was finally time to eat.



Chapter LXI

Okasa took care of seating everyone, spacing everyone out so they were mixed together well. Only Adam was seated next to his mother - the rest of the children were interspaced among the adults they weren't related to parentally.

She had put Saphira on her right and Esmeralda with Patrick, which of course put them at opposite ends of the table. It also unintentionally gave them the best unobstructed views they could hope for short of being seated on the end.

Brianna and Kay were seated across from one another in the middle of the table, and Kent was across from Saphira on Okasa's left hand. Adam held that place of importance on the other end, putting him between Patrick and Charisma, sitting in a regular chair with several thick tomes beneath him as he felt he was too grown up to use the high chair any longer.

Francesca - Forrest's youngest child though she was still several years older than Adam - was seated next to Esmeralda. Esmeralda felt her stare all through grace, and as soon as the family repeated the 'Amen', she turned to the little girl, even as she reached for the dish in front of her.

"Is something wrong, Francesca?"

The little girl tilted her head and frowned. "Mommy said Aunt Theresa said you was an angel. You do kinda look like the picture of the angel that's in my Catechism class," narrowing her eyes and peering at Esmeralda closely. She studied her face, then craned her neck to look behind her, then returned her gaze to Esmeralda's face once more. Esmeralda never lost her calm demeanor; she simply arched a questioning eyebrow in Francesca's direction. Francesca giggled.

"You look like Aunt Chari," pointing to the woman across the table. Charisma looked up with a cocked eyebrow and smirked. It was all Esmeralda could do to keep a straight face. Francesca looked behind Esmeralda once more and frowned again. "Where's your wings?" she asked loudly during a lull in the conversations going on around the table.

Cindy blushed and sighed. "Francesca!"

The little girl looked at her with an innocent expression. "Yes, Mommy?"

"Honey, are you bothering Esmeralda?"

"Oh no, Mommy. I just wanted to see her wings."

Every eye turned to Esmeralda who was trying not to squirm under the attention. Cindy just squeaked and covered her eyes with her hand. "Sweetie, why do you think Esmeralda has wings?"

"Because you said Aunt Theresa said she was an angel. And all angels have wings."

"Oh. My. God." Cindy groaned. "Honey, Aunt Theresa didn't mean literally. Angels live in Heaven... not here on Earth, so Esmeralda can't be a *real* angel. What your Aunt Theresa meant was that Esmeralda is *like* an angel... because of what she does."

Francesca looked back at Esmeralda thoughtfully. "You watch over people?" remembering her catechism lesson on the subject.

Esmeralda chuckled. "No, I clean up after them... I make everything neat and tidy."

"OH!" Francesca exclaimed, turning her head to meet Theresa's eyes. "You're silly, Aunt Theresa! That doesn't make her an angel - that makes her Mary Poppins!!!"

The entire table burst into laughter and Francesca looked mightily pleased with herself at the response she garnered. Then everyone turned back to the many smaller conversations they'd been having and Francesca's attention was taken by Lee Williams to give Esmeralda a moment to catch her breath.

She smiled her thanks and took a swallow of water, then looked over at Paddy who was chuckling softly. "That one's a pistol," he commented with a grin, getting a smile from Esmeralda and a vigorous nod from Charisma. He turned to Charisma and smirked. "Don't even try it," he instructed. "She's a lot like another little girl I remember growing up around this house."

Charisma's eyes widened. "I can't imagine what you mean, Daddy," but she couldn't hide the twinkle in her eyes either.

"I'll bet you can't," he said with a grin. Then he turned to Esmeralda to learn a little more about the newest addition to his family.

************

"So tell us a little about yourself, Saphira," Hunter invited as he passed the mashed potatoes to her. "What do you do for a living?"

"I'm a waitress," she offered without hesitation, scooping out a spoonful of potatoes and passing the bowl on to Okasa. Hunter frowned.

"Are you sure?" Eyes as blue as his own met his with a frown and a pointed stare, and he wondered if he and Saphira could possibly be related in some way. He didn't encounter many with eyes the same intense blue that he saw in the mirror every morning. Okasa gave him an incredulous snort, and caused him to turn her sight and his attention to Mama.

"Hunter - just because you're a detective doesn't mean you know better than Saphira what she does when she goes into work every day. If she says she's a waitress, you can be pretty sure she's a waitress." He opened his mouth to speak, and she held up a hand. "I get that people lie to you in your line of work, but Saphira has no reason to lie here. Besides, if she was going to lie, do you think she'd pick something like waitressing?? Most people who like to make an impression would choose something a little cushier... like an office manager or a broker or a model."

Hunter had the sense to look abashed, and turned back to Saphira. "I'm sorry - I didn't mean for that to sound the way it came out."

"Then what did you mean, exactly? I assure you I really am a waitress. Charisma, Brianna and Esmeralda can all vouch for me."

"I have really mucked this up," Hunter muttered, though not softly enough that Saphira couldn't hear him. She smirked and he gave her a wry smile and shook his head. "Let me restart this - a waitress, huh? Where do you work?"

"Angel's Diner. It's how we met Brianna, in fact. She stumbled in the doors just as we were closing one night. She was completely lost, so Es and I help her get to where she needed to be."

"Don't let her modesty fool you, Hunter. She and Es saved my life."

Hunter grinned broadly at Brianna's words and looked back at Saphira. "You fed her didn't you?"

Saphira cocked an eyebrow. "How'd you know?"

He nodded towards Okasa. "Mama did the same thing. Brianna's been part of the family ever since."

Saphira chuckled and Brianna stuck out her tongue, though she couldn't hide the sparkle in her eyes at the good-natured teasing. She had missed this since her last visit - which at the moment felt like it was a lifetime ago. And maybe it had been, she considered silently. There was a different atmosphere present than she had seen here in a long time, and the only difference was Charisma and her family. So maybe it had been a lifetime ago since the family had been complete.

Then Brianna felt a nudge on her ankle, and looked around to find Kay staring at her meaningfully. "Would you like to share?" she asked quietly, not allowing her voice to spill over into the other conversations going on around them.

"I was just thinking how full the table seems this year."

Kay frowned. "You mean like crowded?"

Brianna smiled and shook her head. "No. I mean like complete."

Kay didn't respond verbally. She just returned Brianna's smile and winked, then resumed eating her meal. Charisma couldn't hear what was being said between them, but she recognized the looks as intimacy, and it made her frown. She continued to eat, but while she paid enough attention to give cursory answers to those around her, her mind and her attention were split to keep track of Brianna's and Kay's interactions as well.

And on the other end of the table, Kent watched Charisma.

************

"So can I ask a question?" Saphira queried, turning the tables on Hunter. He shrugged and nodded.

"Sure - given the fubar this conversation could have easily become, I think I own you that much. Shoot - what's up?"

"Well, I was just wondering why you were so convinced I couldn't be a waitress."

"Your vibe is wrong."

"I beg your pardon??"

"Your vibe is wrong." He sighed. "Despite Mama's inference to the contrary, I'm a good detective. And I'm good at what I do because I have a gut instinct that I rely on - it rarely fails me."

"And what does your gut tell you about me?" Saphira asked, smiling when Hunter's brows flew into his hairline. "Just because I serve food all day long doesn't mean I'm stupid, Hunter. I have a mind, and sometimes I even know how to use it," she said with a chuckle, showing him that he hadn't really offended her.

"That's not what I meant at all," realizing he was getting in deeper and deeper, but unsure how to talk his way out of the crater he currently found himself burying himself in. He scrubbed a hand over his face and sighed deeply. "Your reaction just further cemented my gut feeling."

"How so?" she asked, cocking her head in a listening manner. He noticed their whole end of the table had focused their attention on the conversation and silently cursed himself for starting the discussion in the first place.

"You have an... aura for lack of a better word. Your whole presence is one of power and...." He let his voice peter out, at a loss on how to explain himself. "I want you to look around the table - aside from Charisma and Brianna and Esmeralda of course, do you know what any of them do for a living?"

"I know that Patrick and Okasa are both retired and that Kay reads people, which in my book makes her some sort of psych doctor."

Hunter nodded thoughtfully. "Close enough," he murmured. "All right, for everyone else here, having only spoken with them briefly, can you simply look at them, put that with what little you learned about them in talking to them and tell what they do?"

Saphira looked at him like he was crazy, then shrugged. "I can try." She wiped her mouth with her napkin and set it beside her plate, then turned her head to gaze down the long table, letting her eyes rest on every adult sitting around it for a long moment. She turned her attention back to Hunter. "Can I get them involved just a little?"

"How so?"

"I'd like each of them to stand and to smile."

Hunter blinked, not having expected that request. He nodded his head and stood up, tapping his glass to get the attention of everyone at the table. Rocky looked up from his meal and glared at his brother.

"Hunter, we don't do toasts until dessert and I'm not done with dinner, man."

Hunter chuckled. "You can keep eating, Rock. I only need your attention for a minute. I've asked Saphira if she can figure out what each of you do based solely on your appearance and the small bit of conversation she's had with you. She's asked if you would each...." He held up his hand and turned towards Saphira, listening to her request and nodding his compliance. "Saphira has asked if each of you would stand up for a moment - one at a time - and smile."

Forrest snorted. "What did you say to her, brother?"

Hunter held up his hand. "Do this, and I'll explain when she's done." The family looked at each other, and heads nodded their agreement. Then by tacit agreement, Cindy - who was to Hunter's right - stood first, and looked at Saphira and smiled. After a moment, she seated herself and Kay stood, and so it went on around the table until it was Kent's turn.

When he sat down, the room was silent, waiting for Saphira to tell what she'd discovered about them. She gazed at Esmeralda for a long minute, getting the slightest nod of approval before she blew out a breath and stood up.

"Well obviously I'm acquainted with Charisma and Brianna, which leaves them out. And since Esmeralda is my mate, I'm pretty sure that lets her out as well," smiling at the grins she got for that. "I already knew that Patrick and Okasa were retired... if I was going to guess, I'd say Patrick was some sort of blue collar man and Okasa was an office manager of some type."

"Patrick built roads for forty years and I work at the hospital," Okasa commented with amazement clearly heard in her voice. "That's amazing. How did you...?"

"Mama," Hunter cut in. "Let her finish first, please?"

Okasa wrinkled her nose at him, but motioned for Saphira to continue.

"Okay, um... I'm pretty sure Kay is some sort of psych doc and that Margaret has some sort of interest in fashion or modeling. I would guess she's probably pretty high up the corporate ladder in one of those industries. Lee and Danielle are both teachers, while Cindy is another sort of professional - nurse or realtor or something that keeps her busy and on her feet a lot."

Saphira looked around the table again, smiling when her eyes landed on Esmeralda and seeing the pride that sparkled in her eyes. She lifted her glass to her lips and took a sip of water and then another before setting it down and turning her attention back to the table and the people staring at her in amazement.

"I think Theresa is probably a stay-at-home mom. Rocky is a fireman; Forrest is a police officer and Kent is a restaurateur." She turned her head and met Hunter's eyes. "How'd I do?"

"Before I answer that," Hunter said, holding up a hand to keep anyone from replying, "I have to ask - have you always been a waitress?"

Saphira met his eyes. "In this lifetime, yes," she said honestly.

"You're completely miscast. I just want you to know that." She arched an eyebrow at him and smirked. Hunter laughed and shook his head. "Take a seat, and I'll tell you how you did. Then you can tell us how you did it." Applause broke out around the table and Saphira curtsied neatly, then dropped into her chair with a laugh.

************

"You know," Charisma commented to Brianna after dinner was done, "if Saphira and Esmeralda ever decided to use their powers for evil, we'd be sunk."

Brianna nodded and wrapped her arms across her chest a little tighter. She'd come out to the garden area of the yard as soon as dessert was over, hoping a few minutes of peace would settle the weird sensations she could feel in the pit of her belly. She wanted to blame it on the food, but she knew in the depths of her soul that those strange nigglings could only be contributed to Charisma. She took a deep breath and turned to face Charisma. "Yes, we would," she agreed. "But imagine the book and movie deals they could get out of it," she added with a smirk.

Charisma nodded thoughtfully. "I'd have to go see it at least."

"Oh, so would I. I'd want to see whoever was playing me on the big screen." She paused thoughtfully. "Maybe we could play ourselves."

"Maybe you could ghostwrite the book with them."

"Still trying to get me to go back to writing, Charisma?" Brianna asked with a hint of a smile on her lips though it never reached her eyes. She turned and rubbed her hands up and down her arms. She hadn't intended to be out here this long.

Although Brianna couldn't see it, she heard the shrug in Charisma's voice. "It's something you were good at, Bri - and something you enjoyed doing... once you got past the idea of someone else reading it." Charisma hesitated when Brianna didn't acknowledge her words at all. "Why didn't you tell me?" She didn't move from her spot about an arm's length from Brianna, so she saw the stiffening in Brianna's spine as soon as the words left her lips.

It took a moment, but Brianna relaxed, then she turned to face Charisma. "Tell you what, Charisma? You've got to give me a little more than that."

"Why didn't you tell me about you and Kay? I would have understood, Bri. You were my best friend, and I'm not a homophobe - I never was."

Brianna met Charisma's eyes without flinching and Charisma had to bite her lip to keep from gasping at the pain she saw in those green depths. "Kay and I were a couple after you and I... I met Kay at Harvard - she was in her last year of residency when I entered law school."

"I see," Charisma said slowly, and Brianna wondered if she was putting the pieces together or trying desperately to keep them from reaching their inevitable conclusion. "And I guess you didn't know she would be here today?" the non-sequitor a little hard for Brianna to follow. Her mind had been on another train entirely.

"I wasn't sure," she replied honestly. "She and the family have always been here when I was, but today was a little different than normal. I really didn't know what Okasa was going to do."

She held Charisma's eyes, and blue eyes were the first to turn away. Charisma looked out across the yard that had been prepared for the coming winter and shivered a little at the deadness of it. She wrapped her arms around herself to ward off the chill she felt. Without turning her head to see Brianna, she asked softly, "Did she make you happy, Brianna? Did you cry for days when you broke up?"

"She did make me happy, Charisma - it just wasn't enough for either of us. And no, I didn't cry for days... but I did cry. Kay was very special to me - she still is. And I'm lucky... we stayed friends and I count her husband as a very dear friend as well."

"They sound... impossible," Charisma said on a choked breath.

"They're lovely people, Charisma... if you give them a chance."

Now Charisma turned and faced Brianna squarely. "Would that make you happy, Bri - for me to give them a chance?" Brianna nodded but didn't say a word. "All right - I'll give them a chance... for you." Charisma covered one hand briefly and squeezed, then turned and headed inside. Just before she reached the door, she looked back. "You need to come in soon - it's too cold to be out here without a jacket." Then she crossed the threshold and closed the door behind her.



Chapter LXII

It was coming on dark when families started gathering at the door preparing to leave. The children were reluctantly snugged into their outerwear by parents who knew that the chilly day had given way to a frigid evening. Most submitted to it with a long-suffering sigh, and parents exchanged eye rolls as each child was bundled up for the weather.

Esmeralda and Saphira had said their goodbyes earlier, when Esmeralda had started showing signs of exhaustion again. The girls had watched them go with concerned frowns, but Saphira and Esmeralda never noticed. Esmeralda had taken a good nap, and now she and Saphira snuck down to the staircase landing at her behest to watch the proceedings with interest.

The kids saw Okasa and Patrick emerge from the kitchen with containers of leftovers, and they cheered - the older ones stepped forward to relieve them of their burdens and receive a hug and kiss. As they bid their grandparents goodbye, they headed outside to escape the congestion and free up some space in the now overcrowded foyer.

Brianna walked out with them, not wanting them to be outside alone in the near darkness. Harley just rolled his eyes - knowing he was old enough and responsible enough to be left out here alone, but secretly glad Brianna cared enough to help him keep an eye on his siblings and cousins. For all his grumbling some days, he certainly didn't want anything to happen to any of them.

"I hope your friends are all right, Aunt Bri," he offered as he and Michelle came up to stand beside her next to the Williams van. Brianna turned and looked at him with a question in her eyes. He cocked an eyebrow and smirked. "No... no one said anything, but I've got eyes that can see. I saw how upset you and the rest were when they excused themselves and went upstairs early. I figure one of them must be pretty sick... maybe even terminal or something." He shrugged. "I just hope they're okay. They seem like really nice people, and it was funny to see Saphira blow Dad's sock off at dinner."

Brianna chuckled. "Yeah, she did kind of floor him, didn't she?"

"I'll say," Michelle agreed, waving her brother and sister over as her parents stepped from the house. "That was so much fun - and the look on his face...." She reached up and gave Brianna a hug that she gladly returned in equal measure. "I'm glad you were here, Aunt Bri. I've missed you since you went to Washington."

Brianna smirked. "You can still call me there, you know. The phone still works that far away." Michelle stuck out her tongue, causing the three of them to laugh and Kay to question as she walked up beside them.

"Should I even ask?" looking at the three of them. "Probably not," she added with a laugh when they gave her their cheesiest grins. Lee bumped by them with a smile as he started loading the two younger children into the vehicle. Harley held out his hand to Michelle and they made their way to stand at the back of the van to say a semi-private goodbye. Kay turned to Brianna and opened her arms; Brianna stepped right into them and wrapped Kay in a firm grip.

"I'm so glad you were here," Brianna offered somewhat muffled.

Kay returned the hug fervently. "Even with everything...?"

"Even with."

Kay smiled and pulled slightly out of the embrace, enough so she could look into Brianna's face half hidden in shadows. "I don't know what you said to her, but thanks. If Charisma didn't exactly warm up to me, at least she stopped resenting every breath I took."

Brianna chuckled. "That's progress - I'll take it."

Before Kay could reply, there was a commotion at the front door and Adam ran out. Without thought, Brianna released Kay and ran towards him, snatching him up and lifting him into her arms. He struggled for a moment.

"Hey, Little Man... where's the fire?"

Adam stopped trying to escape the moment he heard her voice. Instead he snuggled down into her hold and buried his nose in her neck. "Br'anna good," he murmured.

"ADAM ROCKWELL!!" came Charisma's shouted voice from the doorway as she exited on a run....

... only to discover him in the arms of her erstwhile best friend. She inhaled deeply, struggling to get her temper under control. Adam had scared the living daylights out of her when he'd jerked way from her and run pell-mell outside, and after everything else that had been thrown at her all day long, she had reached her breaking point. Brianna, having recognized the sheer terror in Charisma's eyes, headed her way immediately with Adam still nestled in her arms.

Kent, realizing that Charisma was torn between panic and fury, slid out the door and intercepted Brianna before she reached Charisma. Brianna understood that he wanted to remove Adam from what could quickly become a field of battle, and she moved to release Adam into Kent's arms. Unfortunately for Brianna, that just made Adam cling to her tighter.

She leaned back, tilting his head up until blue eyes met serious green. "Adam, you need to let go - you're hurting me, Little Man."

"Love Br'anna."

"I love you too, but you need to go with Daddy now. You scared him and Mama when you ran off like that. Do you remember the talk we had with Saphira, after you ran in front of my car?" He poked out his lip in a pout but nodded slowly. "This is the same thing."

"No go!" he commanded and frowned.

"Adam, I'm not going anywhere tonight, and you'll get to see your cousins again before you go home, all right?" He held her eyes for a long moment, then nodded, nuzzling back into her neck. "Okay, but for right now, you need to go with Daddy."

"C'mon, son. I think Gramma was getting out some leftovers for you to have a snack. Are you hungry?" smiling when Adam nodded and released his stranglehold on Brianna's neck. Kent lifted Adam into his arms and leaned forward to brush a kiss over Brianna's cheek. "Thank you," he whispered. "If anything had happened to him...."

"I'm glad I was there, Kent."

Kent nodded. "Seems like you've been there a lot for him. Maybe you're like his Guardian Angel."

"God, I hope not," Brianna said with a laugh. "I couldn't possibly keep up," breaking the tension of those around them. The motion that had frozen at Charisma's bellow resumed and Kent just chuckled in sympathy with her. Then he shook his head and walked back inside, pausing by Charisma a moment before returning indoors.

Brianna looked at Charisma, but when she moved to go to her, Charisma shook her head and turned to walk around the side of the house. Brianna watched her disappear into the darkness, not surprised to feel Kay's hand drop onto her shoulder.

"Talk to her, Bri. It's been a hard day for her, and this was her last straw, I think."

Brianna nodded and patted the hand on her shoulder, then turned to embrace Kay once more. "Thanks, Kay. It means so much to me that you guys came today."

Kay let go and Brianna found herself engulfed in Lee's arms. "We were happy to be here, Bri," he assured her. "But don't you get yourself caught up in that whole political scene down in DC, all right? We're all counting the days until you come home."

Brianna chuckled. "Me too," she admitted. "But we'll be here for a couple more days, so let's make sure to put the time to good use. We'll get together again, right?" The rest of the family - brothers and their wives - cheered at that suggestion as they gathered around for their goodbyes, and then they were all leaving one full vehicle at a time.

Brianna moved to stand on the front steps, not seeing Okasa and Patrick come up behind her as she waved goodbye. Only when she turned did she realize they were there, and she was glad for their steadying hands when she nearly took a backwards header off the steps.

"You all right, Little Bri?" Paddy asked when she was steady again. Brianna nodded.

"Yes, Paddy. You and Mama just surprised me. I thought I was by myself."

"Would you prefer to be?" Okasa asked, searching green eyes carefully.

"No, Mama. I love knowing you and Paddy have my back. I just expected you two to be inside with Kent and Adam."

"Oh no," Okasa stated emphatically. "Aside from wanting to make sure everyone got away safely, Kent was going to give Adam a good talking to. Paddy and I would just be a distraction." She looked around the now dark and empty yard. "Speaking of distractions, where is my daughter? I know Adam nearly gave her heart failure when he ran out. I expected her to be the one to bring him in, reading the riot act or something similar."

Brianna smiled sadly. "I think it all got to be too much. But I have a good idea where she went. Do you think I could get a thermos of hot chocolate?"

Okasa smiled and nodded. "Sure. C'mon inside and we'll make it up. It won't take but a minute."

Together they entered the kitchen, only to find Esmeralda at the stove stirring what smelled like homemade hot chocolate. Saphira was busy shaving chocolate into the pot on the stove while Kent was cleaning up a nearly sleeping Adam. As Brianna, Okasa and Patrick entered the kitchen, he hefted Adam from the chair and into his arms.

"I'm just going to go give him a quick bath and put him to bed. I think all the excitement tuckered him out."

Patrick chuckled. "All the excitement tired me out too."

"We'll be up to say good night in a few minutes," Okasa volunteered. Kent nodded and left the room. The five remaining adults in the room looked at each other for a long, silent moment, before Esmeralda shrugged sheepishly.

"I hope you don't mind. It sounded like a good idea with everyone standing around outside in the cold... especially after Kent told us what happened with Adam."

Okasa marched over to the stove and took a spoon from the drawer beside it. She stirred it around in the hot liquid for a moment, then scooped up a portion, blowing on it lightly before letting it flow across her tongue and down her throat. She closed her eyes to savor the flavor, then opened them and stared at Esmeralda sternly. "If you think you're leaving here without giving me that recipe, young lady, you've certainly got another think coming," her face breaking into a smile. "That's amazing." She leaned over the pot and breathed in deeply. "You fixed enough for everyone, right?"

"Oh yes, ma'am. Always make enough to share with everyone - rule number one."

Okasa rolled her eyes at being called ma'am again; Patrick just laughed roundly. Brianna grabbed the thermos from the place it always was... always had been... and passed it to Mama to fill. Okasa did so without comment, then closed the lid and handed it back to Brianna with a small nod. Brianna smiled her thanks and left the kitchen without a word. The rest watched her go, and it wasn't until they heard the back door close solidly behind her that Saphira spoke.

"Is everything okay?"

"I hope so." Okasa replied slowly. "I truly hope so."

************

Brianna walked through the backyard by rote, glad Patrick and Okasa were such stable, reliable individuals. Not much had changed back here in years other than the bushes getting fuller and the trees growing taller. The gardens - even when the flowers changed with the seasons - were still laid out in the same place and fashion as they had always been. So she moved into the darkness with utter confidence in her steps even though she couldn't actually see much beyond her feet. The bare sliver of the moon offered very little light to her path.

Brianna slowed her approach as she reached the largest tree on the property - one that was guesstimated to be more than one hundred years old. It was in this tree that Patrick had built a tree house for his children. At first it had been Hunter's fortress, then as his brothers grew old enough to climb, it became a place for all of them to hide and play and get away from their parents for just a little while.

When Charisma was born, she was forbidden to join them for the longest time... being a girl and all - until Patrick put a stop to that nonsense by informing his male children that either their sister was allowed to play with them or their tree fort would become a tree castle that only Princesses were allowed to utilize.

So they begrudgingly invited Charisma to join them, and for years they shared the playhouse and it served any number of purposes - an army fort; a pirate ship; an airplane; a hideout and yes... even a castle once or twice.

But as the boys grew into adulthood, they visited the tree house less and less, until only Charisma was left. And she continued to use it throughout high school and into college when she needed somewhere to go to think.

She had introduced Brianna to this place on their first college break - when she'd brought Brianna to meet the family. Brianna still remembered that trip with great affection, and she recalled how glad she was that there was a place she could go to get away from everyone when she felt overwhelmed - which in those days had been much more often than not. Finding a family like Charisma's - especially after her own solitary and broken household - was a lot to handle.

Now, as Brianna neared the place she knew instinctively where Charisma had escaped to, she stopped and took a deep breath, trying to center herself for whatever was yet to come.

Before she could try to tuck the thermos into her inside coat pocket, Charisma's tired voice sounded loud in the still darkness. "Brianna, why are you here?"

Brianna gasped at the pain both words and inflection cut through her. Still, she smiled up gamely in the direction she knew Charisma to be and held up the thermos. "I come bearing gifts, Fair Queen," she answered, much in the same manner as she had all those years ago. She felt Charisma's gasp as sharply as she heard it.

"Please don't call me that," Charisma whispered softly. "Just leave me alone."

Brianna's brow furrowed. What on earth had happened between the time Charisma had shown such concern for Brianna's wellbeing and now? Surely Charisma didn't think Brianna had coerced Adam from the house earlier. Brianna came to a decision and straightened, gripping the thermos handle firmly between her teeth before she started climbing the ladder.

Charisma pushed open one of the shutters and stuck her head out, growling when she saw Brianna making her way upwards. "What part of 'leave me alone' wasn't clear to you, Brianna? I've used up all my tolerance for today. So GO AWAY."

Brianna just glared in Charisma's direction, unable to speak until she reached the top. When she did, she set the thermos to one side of the carpeted floor until she could pull herself up the rest of the way and pulled the ladder up behind her. "I'm sure glad Paddy keeps this place in shape," she muttered to herself before turning to face Charisma with a glare in her eyes.

"First of all, Charisma Tagherty, if you'd really wanted to be alone, you'd have pulled the ladder up behind you so I couldn't follow you. And you KNEW that I would - don't even bother to try and deny it. And secondly, I think I have a right to know what I did to set you off, because I can't think of anything I've done to warrant that sort of reception from you... for any reason."

"Brianna," Charisma's voice so low, Brianna could scarcely hear her sitting mere feet away. "It's not you. It's not Kay. It's not Adam. It's not any one thing. It's everything, and I'm trying really hard to get a handle on things. I don't need you here for that."

Brianna tilted her head and reached for the thermos, opening it and letting the scent of hot chocolate waft through the small, enclosed room. She poured a serving into the cup and passed it to Charisma, who accepted it haltingly. Brianna smiled wryly.

"I'm not trying to kill you, Charisma. Es made it... from scratch. It got Mama's approval."

This got Charisma's attention and she raised her eyes to meet Brianna's. Then she took a small sip, closing her eyes when the taste hit her tongue. "Oh wow - we are so keeping her." She opened her eyes again. "Have you tasted?" offering Brianna the cup when she shook her head no. Brianna accepted the cup and blew briefly before sucking in a small swallow.

"Oh man... that is awesome!" She refilled the cup and passed it back to Charisma. "Now talk to me, Charisma," huffing a little when Charisma dropped her eyes to the cup in her hand. Brianna lifted Charisma's chin with her fingertips and waited for blue eyes to tack to hers. "Charisma, we're supposed to be on a path of friendship - learning one another again. How can we do that if you won't talk to me? That was always the most important part of our friendship to me."

Charisma's anger was clear in the fire that it in her eyes. "Really? Then why won't you tell me why you left me? Why won't you tell me why my family... why KAY...." said with a sneer, "has been part of your life for twenty years that we will never have together?? Why were they so much more important than I was??"

"Charisma, no one has ever been as important as you in my life... even when we were apart. I thought of you every single day and prayed for you every single night."

"Even when you were with Kay?"

"Can I ask you a question?" Brianna's sudden interruption disrupting Charisma's line of thought and she nodded almost automatically before she considered it. "If you take my relationship with Kay out of the equation, what did you think of her? And be honest - I know you talked to Michelle about working for you one summer. Try to be that fair to her mother in your response."

Charisma sighed. "I suppose she's a decent sort - the boys seem to love her and so does Mama. That says a lot about her, I guess."

"Charisma...."

"What do you want me to say, Brianna? She's nice enough, but I hate her for the time she got to have with you that I didn't. We were best friends!! It's like having to make nice with my replacement."

"Charisma, Kay never, ever replaced you - not in my life and not in your family." Brianna paused thoughtfully, reaching for the cup of hot chocolate, and wincing when the lukewarm beverage hit her mouth. She purposely took a large swallow then added some that was still hot to it, frowning when Charisma reclaimed it. "How did you find out about us anyway? No one who knows would have shared that information with you unless you had asked directly. And I know you didn't. So spill."

Charisma took a deep breath. They were so focused on their conversation, neither woman heard Kent arrive at the base of the tree.



Chapter LXIII

"So let me get this straight," Brianna said without even a blip of a smile crossing her face. "You overheard Esmeralda and I talking this morning? *That's* what started all this?"

"Pretty much, yes." Charisma sighed. "I got up last night to get a drink of water and I heard noise in the hall. When I looked out the door, I saw you headed downstairs, so I thought I'd join you - have a late-night snack and gab session like we used to, you know?" waiting for Brianna to nod. "But when I got to the kitchen, you and Es were already talking, so I decided to wait for a good time to break in."

"Only you didn't."

Charisma shook her head. "I couldn't. I didn't know what to say to you. So I went back upstairs and crawled in bed." She snorted softly. "I never did actually go back to sleep."

"I did," Brianna confessed. "As soon as Mama threatened me with warm milk, I was out like a light." Charisma chuckled and Brianna smiled briefly before her expression fell. "So what part of our conversation kept you awake, Charisma? Surely my orientation wasn't a surprise to you? It's not like I've ever attempted to keep it a secret."

"Not exactly, though having it confirmed so blatantly was something of a shock. It was a lot of things - finding out that you had a gay ex-lover that was so important to you she was considered part of the family; learning you preferred the casualness of a fuck buddy to a settled, stable relationship; understanding that you didn't really feel at home with my family despite the fact that they've never treated you as less than family to them."

Brianna bit her lip. Given what Charisma had overheard, it was easy to see where she could have drawn such conclusions, but it didn't keep the misconceptions from hurting. "You're wrong, you know. Oh… not about all of it," she added when Charisma opened her mouth to debate. "Kay is an ex-lover that I cared enough about to introduce to your family. I'll be forever grateful to the Tagherty clan for welcoming her and her family with the same open arms they showed me so many years ago."

"But...."

"I'm not done yet." Brianna said a bit impatiently. "What I meant about the family is that it was odd... different for me to be here... in this house again - especially sharing the same roof with you when everything is so different between us. That doesn't make it bad - it just makes it unusual. Never assume that I don't love your family or that they don't hold a very special place in my heart and life like they always have. This just isn't what has been normal for any of us for a very long time and I was trying to explain to Es the difference it made... being here now with you like this."

Brianna took a deep breath and tried to tone down her anger and Charisma waited, recognizing the expression though she hadn't seen it in a number of years. "As for the other," Brianna said slowly, trying not to speak through clenched teeth, "I resent your assumption. Did you ever think that perhaps I hadn't found the person I was meant to be with? Or that I had fallen in love with someone who wasn't available to me? I'm not a home wrecker, Charisma. I would love to be part of a settled, stable relationship, and I'm pissed that you would believe otherwise."

"Now wait just a minute... before you get all sanctimonious with me - exactly how the hell was I supposed to know that??" holding up a hand when Brianna's lips parted. "No," Charisma said emphatically, point her finger at Brianna. "My turn now. It's not like you were particularly forthcoming, were you? All I know of you is what I knew in college, and you certainly didn't want to be tied down then. I didn't even know you were interested in women - I mean you dated your share of men when we double dated. The only other things I've learned I overheard you telling someone else."

"So you just assumed," Brianna accused flatly.

"What else am I supposed to do if you don't talk to me?!? You said talking together was the most important part of our friendship to you," waiting for Brianna to nod her agreement. "It is for me as well, but it's only going to work if we both do it."

"You're right."

"Naturally," Charisma snarked with a grin and the tension flowed out of the tree house. "So we talk from now on??"

"Yes - no assumptions means no misunderstandings."

"And we be honest with one another... no matter what."

"I can be if you can," Brianna replied seriously, catching Charisma off-guard. Charisma nodded slowly.

"My life is pretty much an open book, but I'll try to fill in any holes that are there." She shivered. "Not here, though. It's freezing, even with the blanket," gesturing with the one she had wrapped around her. "And we've got to be almost out of cocoa."

Brianna peeked into the thermos, but before she could confirm Charisma's words, they heard Kent calling out to both of them. They exchanged glances and Charisma responded even as she unwrapped the blanket from around her body and neatly put it back into the chest it came from.

"I'll be all over for the next few weeks," Charisma said as they prepared to leave the tree house. "I have to check in with all the local campaign offices around the state, but I'd like to continue this conversation soon."

"You still owe me a look at your album," Brianna reminded her.

"You're right I do. Let's find a time we can do that soon."

"I'll check my calendar as soon as we get in. I'm sure we can figure something out."

"Sounds like a plan," Charisma said with a smile as she lowered the ladder. "Now let's get back to the house before Kent sends out a search party. He sounded worried."

"Does he not know where you come to escape everything when you're here?"

Charisma shook her head. "No. You're the only person I've ever shared this spot with."

Brianna didn't quite know what to say to that, so she quickly slid down the ladder and waited for Charisma to drop the thermos into her outstretched hands. Then she stood aside so Charisma could climb down. When they were both on the ground, Charisma linked their elbows and headed for the back door.

"Mama O must have told him where you were... or something," Brianna offered as they reached the garden area. "I don't see him out here anywhere."

"I'm sure," Charisma concurred. "C'mon... let's go see if Es has any of that hot chocolate left."

************

Kent had put Adam to bed and his son had dropped off to sleep before he even realized Charisma was missing from their nightly ritual. When Okasa and Patrick came upstairs to kiss their grandson goodnight, Kent was already outside, wondering where his wife had disappeared to in the freezing cold temperatures. His first thought had been to check the garage, but their SUV sat in the same place they had parked it several days before. And the other vehicles were accounted for as well. That only left the backyard, and with determined steps, he headed around towards the back of the house.

His eyes caught movement ahead of him and he immediately recognized the wisps of blonde hair sticking out around the hat the covered the rest of her head. It sent a pang through him to realize this woman who had be missing from Charisma's life for twenty years knew better how to find his wife than he did. So he followed her at a distance, not wanting to be caught, but curious to know what the hell was going on.

He watched Brianna have a conversation with the air, though he couldn't hear the words exchanged, then he saw Brianna get angry and pull herself up the ladder. When the ladder disappeared up the hole in the bottom of the tree house, he slowly made his way towards it, hoping he could hear what was being said. However, his steps were slow and very measured, not wanting the two women to detect his presence. So he missed a bit of the conversation before he ended up close enough to hear them.

He listened carefully, hearing everything that was being said and a lot more that wasn't. Satisfied that he at least understood what Brianna refused to tell Charisma, he backed away from the tree much more swiftly than he'd approached it, getting back to the patio before he called out for Charisma, and after a second thought, Brianna as well.

Almost immediately, the back door to the kitchen opened and Okasa beckoned him inside. Esmeralda and Saphira were seated at the table and he had the passing thought to speculate where his mother and Patrick had gotten off to that they weren't in the kitchen as well. "Mama O?" he asked, wondering what she would say without betraying her daughter.

"They're all right," Okasa assured him, ladling him up a cup of hot chocolate and offering him a few marshmallows as well. Kent shook his head. "Sometimes they just need to do the 'girl talk' thing alone together."

"In this weather?" he cried in disbelief.

"I never said it was a good idea," Okasa countered. That killed the conversation for a minute or two until Charisma and Brianna came shivering into the room arm in arm. Okasa simply looked at the two of them and shook her head, giving a sigh and rising to pull two more cups from the cabinet before filling them with Esmeralda's hot chocolate.

Brianna unraveled her arm from Charisma's and moved over to rinse the thermos she then put in the sink. Charisma placed her hands on Kent's shoulders, giving them a brief squeeze before moving to take the mug Okasa offered her. She wrapped her hands around it, sighing at the warmth and breathing in the scented steam with a smile.

"This is good stuff, Es," Charisma complimented. "Mama did tell you we're keeping you forever, right?" she asked, bumping her elbow against Esmeralda's shoulder. "How're you feeling? You look better."

"I'm good - the nap helped. I'm just not used to quite so much excitement anymore I guess."

"Do you come from a large family, Esmeralda?" Kent asked. Esmeralda nodded.

"Not immediate, but there's a whole host of extended family... you know, aunts and uncles, cousins, in-laws, outlaws," getting a laugh from around the table. She turned back to answer Charisma's question. "As for keeping us forever, we just figured since Mama practically adopted us today, we could share the family recipe. There are a couple really nice adaptations as well."

"Like peppermint schnapps?" Brianna asked hopefully.

"And what's with this 'practically' nonsense?" Okasa grumbled. "I did adopt you - you ARE family."

"Yes ma'am!" they both snapped out as they straightened in their chairs, as though they were in the military.

"Good, now that we've got that settled," Okasa said with a brief glare trained at both of them before her face was wreathed in smiles. "Let's hear about those enhancements."

"If you ladies will excuse me," Kent said as he rose from his chair, "I think I'm going to go check on my son and then see if I can find my mother. Esmeralda, that was exceptional hot chocolate, and anytime you want to share it with me, I'll be happy to drink it."

"Thank you, Kent," she responded, and with a slight bow in their general direction, Kent left the kitchen. Okasa stood as well.

"I'm gonna go find Paddy. When he's been quiet for this long it usually doesn't bode well." She went around the table and kissed each younger woman on the forehead. She saved Esmeralda for last, knowing Charisma wouldn't talk to her with an audience and still seriously concerned about Esmeralda's general health issues. "I put some of my sleeping draught in a container in the pantry with your name on it - it's right by what little is left of those cakes you brought, okay? If you need it, you take it. I don't want to find you in my kitchen at oh-dark-thirty in the morning suffering from insomnia again - not when there is something I can do to help you get a little rest in my house, all right? It's there if you need it, so use it."

"I will Mama; thank you."

"Good girl." She looked around the table. "And the rest of you don't stay up too late either. It's been a busy day and even without shopping tomorrow, I'm pretty sure it's gonna be almost as busy...especially since I distinctly heard plans being made to get everyone together again."

"Yes, Mama," they replied in unison and Okasa smiled.

"That's what I like to hear!" And with a flourish, she left the four younger women alone in the kitchen. They waited until they figured she was out of earshot, then exchanged grins which quickly escalated into laughter. Then they froze when they heard Okasa shout from the hallway, "I heard that!"

Of course, that simply caused them to laugh louder and harder and Okasa smiled. It had been a long time since the house had been filled with laughter like it had today. It felt good.

************

Kent had done as he said - he looked in on his son, smiling at how peaceful Adam was in repose. He pulled the blankets up over him just a little, then closed the door softly behind him before he wandered down the hallway to his mother's room. He stood in front of her door a moment, then lifted his hand to knock when he saw the light on.

He had to wait a long moment, then he heard her crossing the room just before she swung the door open. Her eyes widened. "Kent? Is everything all right, son?"

"That was my question. You kind of disappeared."

"I just needed a little peace and quiet. You know I love visiting here, but it can get a little overwhelming after a while... especially for a woman who lives alone. Besides, I thought you and Charisma might need some time to fix whatever it is that seems to be bothering her." It was a statement, but Kent could see the question in her expression.

He leaned on the doorjamb and Margaret sighed and rolled her eyes at him. She tugged him into the room by his elbow and motioned him to the one chair while she sat in the edge of the bed. "Now talk to me, Kent! What's bothering Charisma?"

Now Kent was smart enough to know that Margaret wouldn't let him get by with claiming nothing - Charisma had been far enough off the grid today that she wouldn't buy that blatant of a lie. However, there was no way he was going to share with her what he suspected the real truth to be. So he decided to try and keep things simple.

"I think she's a little bit like you, Mother. I mean, I think she just needed a little peace and quiet. That's the second time in less than two weeks that Adam has run away from her and into a situation that could have been harmful to him. Imagine what could have happened to him if Brianna hadn't managed to catch him."

"Oh my."

"Yeah, and like I said - it's the second time he's done that to Charisma recently. I'm pretty sure that was her breaking point."

"So where is she now?"

"In the kitchen... drinking some of Es' homemade hot chocolate." He met her eyes. "Did you have some?"

"After that chocolate cake at dinner?" Margaret asked through her chuckles. "No - I'd like to sleep sometime tonight. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be another busy day."

"Maybe," Kent agreed with a shrug, "but let me tell you, you're missing out. This stuff was fantastic. If she makes it again, you need to try it - I don't care what time of day it is."

Margaret's eyebrows went into her hairline. "That good, huh?"

"She could put Starbucks out of business."

"That's quite a testimony coming from you, son. I may have to give it a try. Maybe I can ask for some tomorrow since I missed out on it tonight."

"Just make sure I'm around to get my share," Kent said with a smile as he stood. "I'm going to go get comfortable," motioning to his trousers and dress shoes. "I've been proper long enough for one day. I'm glad you're all right, Mother. I was a little concerned."

"I'm good, Kent. Now go get some rest - you look tired." They exchanged a brief kiss, and Kent returned to his room. Margaret thoughtfully watched him go before she closed her own door, then she returned to her bed and her book.

************

"Everything all right, love?" Patrick asked when Okasa poked her head into his study. She nodded and entered, then shut the door softly behind her.

"Yeah... just a lot of emotion flying around out there today. I needed a break, and figured I'd find you here."

"Yeah - I needed the break as well. How's Charisma?"

"I think Brianna helped bring her back from whatever upset her."

"You *know* what upset her, Okasa."

"I don't think it was Kay... or at least not *just* Kay. But I'm not sure what else it could have been... although I'm sure Adam running off didn't help matters."

"She needs to put a leash on that boy," Patrick offered with a snort.

"I'm not gonna disagree right now - I'm too tired." She extended a hand to him. "C'mon, old man. There's a bed upstairs calling my name, and I want you there snuggled up beside me. The girls can figure things out tonight, and if that doesn't work, I'll see about fixing things tomorrow."

"Sounds like a plan, Mama. Lead the way."


Chapter LXIV

"Well this has to have been one of the more interesting weekends I've spent on the mortal plane since we were cast out together," Saphira said with a wry smile in her voice as she looked at Esmeralda who was currently curled around her pillow while Saphira packed up their bag in preparation for their departure the following day. Esmeralda smiled tiredly and tilted her head slightly.

"Why do you say that, love?" wondering what had brought about the change of heart that allowed Saphira to joke about their exile, however lightly, instead of grumble about it.

Saphira's eyes widened and her eyebrows jumped to her hairline. "You're kidding me, right?" she asked dryly.

"Not at all," Esmeralda assured her with a smile, then held up a hand before Saphira could protest. "On a surface level, I understand - this has been the first real time off we've had together in a very long time. That in and of itself would make it a good weekend for either of us. But I get the distinct feeling that it has as much to do with being here with these people in these circumstances as it does with our time together."

"You're a pretty smart cookie," Saphira commented with a laugh, causing Esmeralda to stick out her tongue. "You sure you're all right?" her tone turning to one of concern. Esmeralda clasped the hand that had covered her forehead and tugged Saphira closer until she was sitting on the bed. As a matter of course, Esmeralda shifted her body from the pillow to Saphira's lap and Saphira naturally obliged her by running long fingers through blonde hair to scratch lightly at the nape of Esmeralda's neck. Esmeralda purred like a pussycat and Saphira chuckled.

"What's so funny?" Esmeralda asked, twisting her body so she could comfortably look up Saphira's torso to meet her eyes.

"You are," Saphira said succinctly, then rolled her eyes when an arched brow and a poke in the belly prompted her to continue. "You're purring like a kitten." She smiled sadly. "You haven't done that in a long time. I've missed it."

"I feel good," Esmeralda offered with a smile. "I mean, I'm really tired after the last few days - even having Ruby and the girls living with us is nothing like this whole family activity thing the Tagherty's have had going on since we've been here. But it's a good kind of tired - the kind of tired that I earned from being busy and doing things instead of just feeling run down."

"That's about the best thing I've heard from you in a long time, Es. I can't tell you...." Saphira's words stopped when Esmeralda covered her lips with a finger.

"Sweetheart, you don't have to. I know, remember? Just like you do." She frowned a moment. "You said about the best thing - should I ask what the best thing is?"

Saphira's grin was broad. "That you love me - that will ALWAYS be the best thing I can hear from you. And I never get tired of hearing it either."

"Lucky for you then, that I never get tired of saying it. I do love you, Saphira."

"I know Es... I love you too."

"So tell me why you think this has been one of our more interesting weekends - aside from the obvious, I mean. I'd like to hear your impressions."

Saphira tapped Esmeralda's shoulder, causing her to lift her upper body enough that Saphira could shift into a more comfortable position against the headboard. When she was sure Saphira was settled, Esmeralda resumed her place on Saphira's lap, and Saphira continued to gently comb her fingers through Esmeralda's hair. Then she cleared her throat and let her eyes focus beyond the bedroom they were sitting in as she tried to put her observations into words.

"I think maybe Brianna and Charisma have finally reached a place where they are truly comfortable together again... a place where they can really jumpstart their friendship and actually move forward. I'm not really sure why it took a confrontation about Brianna's past to make that happen, but it was obviously something Charisma needed to know. I'd like to think that Charisma might finally be able to accept what is really between them, but quite frankly, I don't trust her to know what that is... much less acknowledge it," she said starkly, looking down to meet Esmeralda's eyes where she found nothing but calm acceptance of her words. Saphira nodded and moved her concentration back to the far wall as she thought.

"The boys and their wives are trying their very best not to be involved in the whole situation, beyond supporting both Charisma and Brianna. I know Charisma was thrilled to get some time alone with her brothers while the rest of us went shopping yesterday."

"I wonder if she knows that was Brianna's doing?"

"Excuse me?" Saphira tugged gently on Esmeralda's hair, forcing Esmeralda to open her eyes and look at Saphira. She butted Saphira's belly with her head and closed her eyes, scowling and peeking at Saphira until the gentle scalp massage resumed. She gave Saphira a satisfied smile and closed her eyes with a sigh. Before Saphira could prompt her again Esmeralda spoke.

"Charisma Tagherty may not know Brianna Walker as she is now, but Brianna Walker has a pretty good handle on Charisma Tagherty. In fairness, one reason is because Brianna never lost contact with the Tagherty family - she knows what makes them... and Charisma by extension... happy." She paused to clear her throat and Saphira offered her a sip of water that Esmeralda accepted gratefully before she lay back down and continued.

"Aside from the tension that Kay's presence caused for several reasons, Charisma was just discombobulated by the whole altered dynamic that this holiday was. Even though she wanted Brianna here - invited her even - actually having her here threw off the whole relationship she's used to having with her brothers."

"Not following," Saphira offered tersely. Esmeralda sighed.

"When Charisma first brought Brianna home with her from college, she instructed the boys to treat her like family - Brianna was one of them, and as such, she was part of the sibling gathering at every get together. Brianna and Charisma splitting up didn't change anything as far as the boys were concerned; Brianna was still one of the family and they treated her as such... even welcoming Kay when Brianna brought her home - once Kay had been properly vetted, of course. But they always had time when it was just the siblings - no parents, no children and no significant others. And although they certainly considered Brianna to be Charisma's significant other, they understood that wasn't what Charisma had meant when she'd called Brianna family. So every holiday, there has always been a little while when it's just been the Tagherty's grown kids - the five of them, during Charisma's college years, then just the boys and Charisma or the boys and Brianna once the girls were no longer together. It was quite a shock when Charisma realized that Brianna really was still as much a part of the Tagherty family as she was, and Brianna recognized that. She spoke to Hunter about it before he left on Thursday night."

"You overheard?"

Esmeralda smirked. "Naturally."

************

"Brianna?"

"Trust me, Hunter. As much as I want to be included, Charisma *needs* it to be just the four of you."

"It's not right!" he stated adamantly, and she smiled at him sadly and shook her head in agreement. "You're still part of the family - that's never changed."

"I know... and you don't know what that means to me... what it's always meant. And no, it really isn't very fair, but life rarely is," she said softly. "Be that as it may, Charisma needs the surety of her brothers right now. I'm pretty sure meeting Kay rocked her world... and not in a good way - she wasn't ready for that." A beat. "It's little enough for me to do for her. And I'll come back around to see you guys again... promise."

"You still love her," he whispered, his smile growing as wistful as Brianna's.

"I never stopped, Hunter. You know that."

He nodded. "I did... I do. We all do. I just wish...."

"So do I," Brianna admitted. "But we both know it will never happen. She won't let it. Besides, Kent seems like a great guy... very stable and level-headed. He makes her happy and I would never do anything to jeopardize that for either of them... or Adam."

"No... no I don't think he does." Hunter held up his hands to keep Brianna from interrupting. "Don't get me wrong, Bri - even though we were shocked when Charisma brought him home as her fiancé, we all liked Kent once we got to know him. He is a good man and a great dad. But he doesn't make Charisma happy - he makes her content. There's a huge difference."

Brianna shrugged, knowing Hunter was right. "Maybe, but it's her call to make."

"What about you, Bri? When do you get to be happy?"

Brianna smiled wryly and patted his arm. "I'm happy enough. At least we're together as a whole family again for the first time in twenty years. And there are new friends to boot."

"I like them, Bri," Hunter commented, recognizing the change of topics for the ploy that it was and letting Brianna get away with it anyway. "I really do. Though why Saphira is a waitress instead of a law enforcement officer of some kind...."

************

"No he didn't," Saphira said flatly in disbelief.

"Saphira, why would I make it up? Of course he did. He can't figure out why his instincts... instincts that he trusts on a daily basis to solve crimes and save his life if necessary... were so far off base. It's going to drive him crazy for a long, long time."

"That's a little bit funny," Saphira snickered.

"Yeah, but it's also a little mean. I mean, it's not like you can go around announcing that you were an Angel of Vengeance in another life. Well, I guess you could, but I'm pretty sure it would wind up with you making a one-way trip to the Looney bin."

"I could be the head toon!"

"You already are," came the snappy retort, causing Saphira to start tickling Esmeralda, and Esmeralda to start squealing. They didn't actually realize how their voices carried until Adam came rushing into the room, Charisma hot on his heels.

"ADAM ROCKWELL!!"

"MAMA!" he yelled right back, running towards the bed where Saphira and Esmeralda were now frozen in place, watching as the pajama clad little boy made a beeline towards them. Saphira reached down an arm and scooped him up onto the bed to sit beside her just as Charisma appeared in the door with Kent and Brianna following right behind her.

"Everything okay in here?" Brianna asked, peering around Charisma to one side so Kent could stand behind his wife if he wanted. Instead, Charisma took that as her cue and moved into the room with Brianna beside her. Kent waited in the doorway, a little uncomfortable, but not wanting to leave in case there really was a problem and he was needed.

Before Esmeralda or Saphira could answer, Adam reached over and gently patted Esmeralda's flushed face. "Es 'kay?" he questioned seriously, a deep frown cutting lines between his eyes. Esmeralda caught his hand and squeezed it lightly.

"I'm fine, Sweetie. Why would you think otherwise?"

Adam tilted his head thoughtfully as he worked out what Esmeralda meant in his mind. Then he looked between her and Saphira. "Screamin'," he said perfunctorily.

Saphira chuckled and Esmeralda blushed, though she couldn't stop the smile that crossed her face. "Oh, honey... we're fine. Saphira was just tickling me. I forgot to be quiet. I'm sorry."

"Okay?"

Esmeralda nodded. "Okay."

Adam leaned forward and gave her a sloppy kiss, then threw his arms around Saphira's neck before Kent finally entered the room and scooped him out of the bed and swung him into the air, making Adam squeal this time.

"C'mon, Boy - it's past your bedtime. What say you and me go find a good story to read and leave Mama and Brianna in here to visit with Esmeralda and Saphira for a little while before bed?" smiling when he saw Adam's face scrunch up to argue. "It's a girl thing - men like us don't get invited to girls sleepovers 'cause they do all kinds of girly things... like brush their hair and paint their nails and...." Kent's voice trailed off as he and Adam made their way down the hallway and into the bedroom. The four women left in the other room just looked at one another for a long moment, then burst into laughter.

"Oh he's good," Saphira commented. "I expected a fight." She turned to Esmeralda. "We should hire him - there are a few people I know who could use a handler like him."

"A handler?" Charisma asked distractedly.

"Someone who can manage people who are of an age to be considered legal adults," Saphira replied dryly. "But of a mindset to think that they are still children."

Brianna chuckled. "Hey! That sounds like a lot of people *I* know... most of them in the capital," she added with a smirk. Charisma laughed.

"I think I know some of them as well." She turned to Esmeralda and tilted her head. "How are you doing, Es? We've kept you pretty busy this weekend... especially for someone who's supposed to be resting and recovering."

"I'm good, Charisma... really good. Okasa has made sure I haven't overdone and...."

"Yeah - I probably should have warned you about that," smiling when two sets of eyebrows shot into dark and light hairlines even as Brianna nodded her agreement to Charisma's unfinished statement. "Mama has a tendency to mother everyone. Age doesn't matter in this house - you visit the Tagherty household, Mama keeps an eye on you. You become family. Well, now you have another Mama. And she will always treat you like you're her kid."

"Yeah... I figured that out when she threatened me with warm milk," chuckling at Brianna's automatic wince of disgust. "But it's... nice. It's nice to belong to a family who looks out for one another."

Saphira nodded. "This is a good family to belong to, and we're both glad you invited us to join you this weekend."

"We're glad you came," Charisma assured them both. "But ask Brianna - you're in now, so that means you're stuck with the lot of us for a very long time. Like the rest of your lives long."

"She's right," Brianna agreed with a firm nod of her head. "Holidays, birthdays, oddball get-togethers in the summer - you'll be expected to be here for every single one of them," watching their eyes widen in dismay and wracking her brain for what she could have said to achieved that particular response. Then she nearly slapped herself stupid as realization dawns. "Or as many as you can manage to get here for. We've all missed a few things because of work obligations - Mama understands. She doesn't like it, but she does understand." She sighed as she watched them visibly relax.

"We'll try," Esmeralda said softly. Saphira nodded but didn't say anything, knowing Esmeralda wasn't finished. "I can't tell you what this weekend has meant to both of us. And I really do feel... so much better. Not sure what it is that made the difference or if it has just been the whole experience, but it's amazing to feel... good again."

"So that means when I get back into town, we can have our girls' day, right?" Charisma asked, looking between Brianna, Esmeralda and Saphira. They exchanged glances and shrugged.

"Sure," Brianna said casually. "Why not? Do you know when you want to shoot for?"

"Let me check my calendar tonight and we can set it up in the morning before you three head back." She glanced at the clock. "And speaking of... does anyone want to come down to the kitchen with me for one of the last slices of chocolate cake before bed?"

Saphira nudged Esmeralda into a sitting position, then Charisma took one proffered arm while Brianna took the other. Soon the four of them were comfortably ensconced around the kitchen table with plates of cake and glasses of milk, laughing like nobody's business.

Okasa peeked in on them from the doorway, then headed upstairs with a smile on her face. Maybe everything will finally work out, she thought. She had no way of knowing what was headed their way.



Chapter LXV

Ruby and the others were waiting at the house for them when they returned home, so the next couple of weeks saw something of their normal routine return to Esmeralda's and Saphira's household. Saphira and Ruby went back to their scheduled shifts at the diner and everyone else except Esmeralda took one of the round-the-clock ethereal guardian shifts on Brianna and Charisma. To keep either mortal woman from 'feeling' the presence of someone known to them on the corporeal plane, Brianna's office staff kept tabs on Charisma, and Charisma's staff did the same for Brianna. All except for Ame - who had reported back to her job after the holiday was over and Kent returned to the City; and Mal - who like the rest had been called Home, but had yet to return to her assignment.

Esmeralda wondered what was up with that - she didn't have the staff necessary to keep up with Kent without Mal. She was hoping they would hear something from Mal sooner rather than later. She was getting more than a little antsy, despite what were becoming weekly calls from Brianna, Charisma and Okasa keeping her abreast of a lot of what was going on.

So she was thrilled when, as the third week approached, she opened the front door one afternoon to find Mal on the other side. She smiled when she noticed Mal had remembered her gloves, and when Mal followed her gaze, she chuckled lightly and shrugged. Then she allowed Esmeralda to pull her inside the house and close the door firmly behind her.

Mal stripped off her gloves and hung up her coat, then shadowed Esmeralda to the kitchen, gratefully accepting a mug of hot chocolate. She sniffed deeply before sipping, then met Esmeralda's eyes with a grin. "I have missed your hot chocolate, Es. You must be feeling better. But, um... where is everyone?"

"Saphira's already left for work; Ruby's not home yet; Jade went to pick up some groceries; Coral and Amber are both upstairs asleep; Ame's with Adam; Turq and Jas are out driving; and Indi and Opal are guarding Charisma and Brianna respectively. So it's just you and me here at the moment."

"Good... that's good."

"So what's up?" Esmeralda asked Mal directly, forcing green eyes to meet her own. Mal bit her lip and Esmeralda extended a hand, waiting until Mal accepted it before she pulled them towards the living room. Once they were seated, Esmeralda patted the hand she held. "Tell me."

"I have a question first," Mal stated and waited for Esmeralda to signal her continuance. When Esmeralda nodded, Mal nodded back and took a deep breath. "Have I missed anything... something important? Like something big happening between Charisma and Brianna?"

Esmeralda blinked. "You mean like them...?"

"I mean like them screwing around together or declaring their undying love for one another or something equally momentous."

Esmeralda cleared her throat. "No - not unless it's been within the last few hours. Amber and Coral didn't mention anything, and neither did either Charisma or Brianna when they called."

"Were they together?"

"Excuse me?" Esmeralda frowned.

"Charisma and Brianna - were they together when they called?"

"I'd have to go with no," Esmeralda replied slowly. "For one thing they didn't call at the same time, and for another, Charisma is still out of town as far as I know and Brianna's here." She angled her head slightly and cocked an eyebrow. "What's this about, Mal? What happened? And where is Kent?"

"Jade is keeping an eye on him for me - I caught her on her way to the store," she said in answer to Esmeralda's surprised look. "She's still gonna pick up the groceries; she's just gonna be a little later doing it than she planned."

"Okay - so why are you here, Mal? Something must have happened."

"It did. Give me a minute to explain - it will help you understand." Mal set her cup on the table and rose to pace, running a nervous hand through her hair before turning back to meet Esmeralda's eyes. "When Kent got back from his holiday, he seemed very thoughtful... almost pensive. He still went to work - his performances haven't suffered. He seems to be able to separate his character from his real life. Anyway," waving her hands, "he's going to work everyday and to the restaurant sporadically, but he's been spending a lot of time pacing his apartment and looking out the windows. He hasn't gone home to Washington or the Tagherty's since he returned to the City - no weekends away to spy or stalk or whatever it was he was doing to Charisma before they went to the Tagherty's for the holidays. With me so far?"

"Right beside you," Esmeralda confirmed.

"All right then - so imagine my surprise when today... out of the blue, Kent Rockwell met with his family's lawyer."

"He's getting his will in order because something's wrong?"

"Not exactly. He had separation papers drawn up."

"Excuse me?" Esmeralda blurted, then held up a hand to keep Mal from repeating herself. "I heard you. I'm just processing what you said."

"Trust me," Mal said wryly, "*I'm* still processing what I said. That's why I asked if anything big had happened between Charisma and Brianna."

"No," Esmeralda replied distractedly, pinching her lip between her fingers while she let her mind play over the things she did know and other things she suspected. "Nothing big has happened, but a lot of little things have." She turned and met Mal's eyes. "Did he sign them?"

Mal shook her head. "No. He only asked for them to be drawn up... by the lawyer personally - no secretaries, no paralegals - by the senior partner himself. The lawyer is supposed draw them up and to keep them until such time as Kent requests them."

"So it may be a pre-emptive strike," Esmeralda mused, mostly to herself. Mal recognized the tone and remained quiet while Esmeralda worked things out in her mind. "Then again...." She sighed. "Thanks, Mal. I'm not sure what this means yet, but I definitely needed to know."

Mal smiled. "It was worth it for the hot chocolate. But I better get back so Jade can finish with her shopping."

Esmeralda nodded and rose to walk her to the door. "Mal, if he decides to take another trip this way, make sure I know before he gets here, all right?"

"I'll do my best, Es. Promise."

"Thanks, Mal. That's all I can ask for." Mal donned her outerwear and headed back to the City so Jade could come home and finish the shopping. Esmeralda returned to the living room to think.

************

"Brianna? This is Charisma," the words causing Brianna to roll her eyes and chuckle. She was pretty certain she'd always recognize Charisma's voice, but she didn't see the need to enlighten Charisma to that fact.

Instead, she replied, "Hey Charisma! What's up?" In the days following their long talk at Okasa's, the two had spent a few minutes on the phone everyday... even if it was only to exchange a 'hi... how are you' before heading off again - for Charisma, to the next round of meetings and political gatherings; for Brianna, to reconnect with the friends she had missed during her time in Washington.

"Not much," Charisma replied. "I've got a few more sessions here, then I'm headed back to DC for the next few days. I've got some informal meetings with several different committee members, and then there's that party at Gypsum's."

"You're going to that?" Brianna asked in amazement.

"Yes, and so are you," Charisma asserted. "This is one of those political 'can't miss' things." Charisma heard Brianna's frustrated sigh and softened her tone. "You really don't want to miss this, Bri. Even though you don't plan to be here beyond the next election for that seat, there's no reason to snub the people you have to at least *pretend* to get along with for the next couple years."

"Dammit," Brianna groaned. "I had plans that night."

"Bring your plans with you; I'm sure she wouldn't mind," Charisma said lightly, glad Brianna couldn't see the grimace that crossed her face as the words left her mouth.

"Um... no. Not that kind of plans." Brianna sighed - she had really been looking forward to a night out with the girls. It was unfortunate that two of them were only available the night of Gypsum's party, but she figured she didn't need to go to the Senate soiree as she wasn't in Washington to make friends or influence people. Charisma's words, however, gave her pause. "Guess I need to make a few phone calls," she added dejectedly.

Charisma grimaced. She was dying to know, but refused to let her curiosity run away with her, hoping Brianna would choose to share of her own volition. Instead, she offered. "Well, maybe I can help make it better."

"Oh?"

"We could go to Gypsum's together, then you could come back to the house... stay the night, maybe?" hating that she sounded so tentative. "We could have a slumber party - bring your album and we could look through our pictures... maybe share our memories. Then try to catch up on each other's lives a little bit? I mean, we do have nearly twenty years to fill one another in on."

Brianna's smile could be heard through her voice. "That sounds great, Ri," slipping back into their comfortable familiarity with the thought of spending the night at the forefront of her mind. It would be the most intimate situation they had been in since they'd traveled Europe after college. She felt the nervous fluttering in her stomach, but remembered Esmeralda's words of encouragement - if she wanted this... wanted Charisma's presence in her life... then she was going to step up and be a part of making it happen.

"Good... good," Charisma agreed hastily, battling her own nervousness. After all, it had been forever since she'd allow someone - allowed Brianna - close and she'd been devastated when Brianna had simply walked away. Charisma was taking a risk letting Brianna in again, but she felt good in her decision. "Come over Saturday and pack a bag for the weekend. I'm sure we can find something to do."

Brianna covered her eyes to keep the images caused by Charisma's words from running rampant through her mind. Only partially successful, she chuckled to clear her throat of its sudden huskiness. "I'm sure if we can't manage, Adam will keep us more than a little busy."

"If he was going to be there maybe," Charisma said with a laugh. "Mama is going to keep him. I think she just wants to give Ame a chance to rest a little."

"He running you crazy up there?"

"Well let's just say that if I could bottle and sell his energy, this country's dependency on foreign oil would disappear."

"Wow - you should probably look into that. I mean, it would probably go a long way towards your bid for the Presidency."

"Right?" Charisma agreed with another chuckle as she glanced at her watch. "So we're on for Saturday?"

"Yes. Just let me know when...."

"Whenever you can get there will be fine. I'll be back in town by Wednesday afternoon, so...."

"All right. I'll bring the donuts."

"I'll make sure the milk is cold," Charisma assured, knowing her part in the breakfast scenario. She looked at her watch again and sighed. "I've got to go. Turq is waiting to take me over to the state capital - meeting with the Governor this morning."

"Tell Michael I said hello and that I'm still waiting for him and Jenny to visit."

"Will do. Talk to you later."

"Bye, Ri."

"Bye, Brianna Brianna."

************

"Hey, Old Man," Doug greeted Kent hours later when he was done at the theatre for the evening. Together they walked over to Kent's table and took a seat. "How's it going? How was your holiday? We haven't seen you here much in the last couple weeks," his tone both lightly chiding and curiously concerned.

Kent smiled, more at peace than he had been in a long time. "It's going really well, actually. The show is standing room only and getting good reviews. The holiday was...." He paused. "It was good," he added after a moment. He didn't mention how enlightening it was - there were some things a man just didn't share with anyone else... even his best friend - and overhearing Brianna's conversation with Hunter had settled a number of things in his mind. "Met some new people."

"Anyone interesting?"

"No one famous, if that's what you're asking... aside from that new Senator - Brianna Walker. Charisma invited a lesbian couple from DC," watching Doug's eyebrow arch in interest. "Nice women - they seem to have had a rough time of things though. It was funny watching Saphira give Hunter the run around though. She's a waitress - he was convinced she was some sort of cop."

"How did he miss that so badly?" knowing from previous conversations with Kent that Hunter was a good detective.

"I dunno... maybe because she's got better observational skills than he does. At dinner he challenged her to name everyone's occupation. She didn't miss many and those that she did miss, she wasn't off by much. It was funny to watch Hunter's eyes pop out of his head."

"I would have loved to have seen that," Doug said honestly.

"I'm pretty sure one of the boys got it recorded. I know I saw a couple cameras come out," leaning back as the server set a full plate in front of him. Kent nodded his thanks and put his napkin on his lap before picking up his fork. "I'll see if I can get a copy for you to see," he added as he put his first bite into his mouth. "Man, that's good. Ron in the kitchen?"

"Yeah."

Kent nodded. "I can tell. That is *really* good."

Doug chuckled. "I know. I had the same earlier." He paused then pressed on. "So where ya been?"

"Honestly? I've been going home most nights. I had a couple workshops that were early morning deals, and they made for some very long days."

"So everything's okay then?"

"Everything's fine. Just had to take care of some things that cut my time here short. Sorry I didn't mention it beforehand - they came up kinda unexpectedly."

"Not a problem, Kent. Carolyn and I were just a little worried when we didn't see you. Speaking of... we were wondering if maybe you could come by this weekend."

Kent chewed thoughtfully as he considered. "I could probably come by for a while on Saturday morning. I've got some things to take care of on Sunday," having already decided to slip down to the DC house and pick up a few of his things that he wanted to have with him in Manhattan.

Doug nodded. "Saturday morning would be fine." He motioned to Kent's empty plate. "You want some more?"

"Oh God no - I think I'll explode if I eat another bite. It was excellent though. I'm gonna go thank Ron, then I'm gonna go get some sleep."

"Me too," Doug agreed as he rose and patted Kent on the back before heading towards his office. Kent stretched and stood as well, making his way to the kitchen before heading out the door. He saluted the maître d', knowing she would lock the doors behind him as soon as they closed.

He walked down the sidewalks, still busy even at the darkest part of the morning. He wondered if he was doing the right thing, and realized he hadn't really done much of anything yet. At least things were in place now, though, if it came down to it. And that gave him a measure of peace.

Kent nodded to the doorman who greeted him by name as he held the portal open and he passed through the lobby area of the apartment building, entering the elevator and pushing the button for his floor without pausing. It was time to get some sleep. Everything else would have to wait until tomorrow.

************

"He really filed for separation?" Saphira asked when she and Esmeralda were climbing into bed that evening.

"No - he didn't file for separation. He's just had the papers drawn; he can't file them until he signs them. And once he does that, they'll be served to Charisma."

Saphira nodded slowly. "I wonder what made him decide to have them drawn up."

"I think the weekend at the Tagherty's was enlightening - he had to have seen Charisma's jealousy of Kay; it was obvious to everyone though Kay is the only one that actually called her on it. And I know he overheard what Brianna said to Hunter. I saw him. Other than that...." Esmeralda shrugged. "I don't know, but honestly, that was enough."

"So what now?"

"Now we go to sleep. Things are in motion on every front - there's not a lot we can do except wait and watch and pray."

"Goodnight, Es. Love you."

"Love you, Phira."



Chapter LXVI

Esmeralda looked around the table late Saturday morning and realized the only angels missing were Mal, who was still in Manhattan with Kent; Turq who was currently driving Charisma and Brianna all over the city; and Jade. She looked at Opal and Indi. "I'm gonna just jump right in here and guess that Brianna and Charisma are already together this morning and that Jade is watching them both?"

Opal nodded. "Brianna actually got to Charisma's before Coral and Amber left. We let them know about this morning's meeting and Jade volunteered to keep an eye on both of them so we could all be here. Said she'd call if they split up, but the last word we had was that they were going shopping. That's why Turq is missing as well. Charisma refused to take the Metro if they were shopping."

"Well, with a little luck, this won't take long. I wanted to get each of your impressions on them. However, I would like your uncensored, unbiased opinions. So if you don't want to be unduly influenced by one another, I will speak with each of you privately. Otherwise, we'll do this as a group." Esmeralda waited a full sixty heartbeats, taking time to meet each pair of eyes in the room. Saphira was the last and when she nodded, Esmeralda nodded back.

"Very well. All I ask is that you don't interrupt one another. You can comment once each of you is done, but allow one another to finish before you break in, all right?"

Heads nodded their agreement around the table and Esmeralda took a deep breath, then looked at Coral. "Tell me how Brianna has been." She figured to start with her night crew for two reasons. One was they were much more familiar with their charges as they had not needed to change watch duties because of the holidays. The other, and more obvious, one was that they needed to get upstairs to sleep sooner rather than later. Coral sucked in a lungful of air and proceeded to speak.

"She's been... well, she'd been much like she's always been, I think. I mean, not much in her routine has changed. She's been talking to her friends back home a little more, but I think that is due in part to her recent visit, and also because she had to cancel their dinner together. She was really looking forward to that. Otherwise, it's been like it has since she got here mostly. She spends time looking over legislation - I think she's trying to do the best job she can while she's here and that means a lot of her 'free time' is spent trying to catch up and keep up." Esmeralda nodded, but didn't reply and Coral resumed her discourse.

"Most nights when she's done with her work, she'll take a few minutes to look at her album. She doesn't say anything, doesn't study one picture more than the others - she simply goes through each page slowly front to back until she reaches the end. Then she puts it away for the night and grabs her book to read for a few minutes before nodding off," Coral finished with a light shrug of her shoulders.

Esmeralda held her eyes a moment longer, then nodded in satisfaction and turned to Coral's counterpart. "Amber?"

Amber sighed loudly. "I need alcohol," she joked, looking into her coffee cup. "Charisma is driving me to drink."

"How so?"

"This thing with Brianna is making her nuts, and she's trying to share the love with me, I guess. I dunno!" Amber held up her hands, then raked them through her hair and sighed again. "When she was at her mother's house, it was a little different - she had appearances to maintain... even with Okasa. Here though... especially since she's been alone in the house for the last few days.... It's hard to describe, but she's seriously driving me up a tree."

Golden eyes met green, and Esmeralda encouraged Amber, "Let's hear the details."

"She's... restless, for lack of a better way to describe it. She goes out and does her political thing during the day and you'd never know it. But at night when she's home by herself...." Amber shrugged. "She's restless. She walks around a lot. Usually, she sits at her desk in her office and does her work. Even when that album has made an appearance, she's been sitting at the desk just studying a single picture for however long it takes her to be satisfied."

"This week's been different?"

"This week has been very different. Even when she's working on her political stuff, she's been pacing and prowling around the room. If she's reading, she keeps it in her hands while she walks; if she's thinking, she leaves the work on the desk and just paces. When she wants to make notes, she goes back to the desk to do so, then resumes patrolling the room."

"And does she pull the album out?"

Amber chuckled wryly. "Oh yes... but not in the office. The album has been moved to her bedside table, and every night she goes through it, studying each picture intently. She even squints at most of them, as though that will help bring into focus whatever it is that she needs to ask Brianna about."

"How long does this go on?"

"Until she falls asleep. Usually, she'll nod off, then jerk herself awake. Only then does she set the album aside and settle down to sleep properly... at least until she starts dreaming." Esmeralda's brows went into her hairline, and Amber chuckled again. "It wouldn't be so bad if I could understand her, but she talks and mumbles all night, and I'm not getting one word in ten. I'm pretty sure I'm missing the really good stuff," blowing a raspberry in frustration. Everyone laughed and Esmeralda shook her head at Amber's incorrigibleness.

After a moment, they settled down again and it was quiet while Esmeralda processed Amber's words. When she was done, Esmeralda turned to Indi.

"Talk to me, Indi."

"Well, Es... it's like Amber described. Charisma is perfectly normal in her everyday routine. When she's out in public, she's very conscious of her image and the fact that people could be watching her. She is very put together - if I didn't know she was anxious about something, I'd never guess it from her daytime demeanor."

"What do you see?" Esmeralda asked, tilting her head in question, then smiling when Indi frowned at her. "You said if you didn't know she was anxious, you'd never guess. Since you do know, what do you see?"

Indi sighed and let her gaze go inward thoughtfully before she spoke. "It's an uneasiness, like she's not comfortable in her skin. But I'm not sure if it's because she wants an answer from Brianna or because she doesn't."

"So you think she's finally figured out the right question?"

Indi shrugged. "I'm only guessing, but yeah... I think so. Maybe knowing the question is what's making her so antsy."

Esmeralda looked at Saphira, who nodded. "Either would make sense," Saphira offered, knowing Esmeralda was wordlessly asking for her opinion despite her previous request for silence. "But I'd go with the idea that she's figured out the question she needs to ask. I'd go so far as to say she's probably figured out the answer and that's actually what's driving her crazy. Remember, Brianna's answer is going to change everything for Charisma - everything she knows and has believed for years... especially about herself."

"Do you think she'll ask this weekend?" Esmeralda asked Saphira, forgetting the rest of the room for the moment. The other angels simply watched and listened - rarely did they see the two interact officially as angels, and they were fascinated by the peek they were getting.

Saphira considered her reply, knowing Esmeralda was asking her to respond from a tactical stance. "Given Charisma's capacity for denial, I'd say no. Most of her wants to know because she feels like she's the only one not in on the secret and that's driving her crazy. But part of her isn't ready for the answer she's pretty sure she's gonna get, and deep down she knows that." Saphira sighed. "Considering how much time we've already spent waiting for them to get to this point, I'd be real surprised if we get a resolution today. They've turned procrastination into an art form and given the word a whole new meaning," giving Esmeralda a frustrated glare. Esmeralda chuckled.

"And that meaning is...?"

"Procrastination - how to piss off everyone around you while denying the obvious; making even the most tolerant angel want to pull their hair out, and the rest of us just go postal," Saphira replied with a smirk, garnering her a laugh from the others around the table.

Esmeralda smiled and shook her head. She'd be the first to admit that these two had been among the more challenging of her cases, but she wasn't sure if it was due to them exclusively or if it had more to do with the fact that they were working under so many restrictions. She briefly wondered what would happen if they weren't successful - would Charisma and Brianna be punished?

Esmeralda looked up when she realized that it had grown quiet again and every eye was focused on her. She cleared her throat. "Sorry," she said softly. "I was thinking." She turned to Opal. "So tell me about Brianna."

"Well, whatever happened at Okasa's seems to have helped her. She appears more... stable. No, not stable because I don't think she was ever unstable. But she does seem more confident... maybe a little resigned - like she knows what's coming and is ready for it."

Before Esmeralda could say anything, the phone rang and everyone froze except Saphira who stepped out of the room to take the call. In just a minute, she was returning. "That was Mal," she said without prelude. "Kent is coming down tomorrow." Esmeralda's eyes widened and she waited for Saphira to continue. Saphira just shrugged. "That's all she said."

"Seriously?" ignoring the look Saphira gave her. "That's really all she said?"

Saphira but her lip on the retort she wanted to make, knowing if Esmeralda was pressing for more, there was a reason for it. She closed her eyes in thought to give Esmeralda the message word for word. "Saphira, this is Mal. Es asked me to let her know if Kent was headed your way. He just bought a round trip ticket for tomorrow, so whatever he's got planned shouldn't take him long. I'll let you know if I figure out what he's doing before we get there, but don't count on it." Saphira opened her eyes and looked at Esmeralda who nodded her thanks.

"Does he know that Charisma is home this weekend?" Ruby asked. Esmeralda turned to her.

"I don't think so," looking around the table again. "Ladies?"

Indi and Amber exchanged glances and shook their heads in tandem. "She's only spoken to him twice on my watch since he went back to the city," Indi offered. "She didn't mention coming back to Washington either time."

"She hasn't talked to him at all on my shift," Amber added. "So I'd have to say he expects to find the house empty to do... whatever it is he's doing."

Esmeralda blew the bangs off her forehead. "This just gets better and better. All right, you two," motioning to Amber and Coral, "upstairs. You know how these political parties can get...."

"... and usually do once company manners wear off and the alcohol starts flowing," Coral snarked and turned to Jas. "Are you driving tonight since Turq is working today?"

"I'm not supposed to, but I'll be around to lend her a hand if she needs it."

"I don't think it'll be necessary," Esmeralda offered, "but I'm glad you'll be on standby."

"Right beside her," Jas assured.

"Good. You two," gesturing to Opal and Indi, "get back to Brianna and Charisma. I don't expect a lot to happen before tomorrow, but you never know. You know how to reach us if something does. I'll be here the rest of the day, okay?" waiting for heads to nod. "The rest of you... well, I'm sure you can find something to do to keep busy, right?" she added with a tired grin.

Saphira took the hint and rose, knowing everyone else would start moving if she did. "I need to get ready for work." Then she turned to Ruby as if just realizing she was there. "What are you doing here anyway? Aren't you supposed to be at work?"

"Normally, yes. But Matilda is training a new girl today and asked if I'd mind giving up my hours so she could learn the ropes."

"That's kind of like throwing her in the deep end without a life preserver, isn't it?" Amber asked as she stood and yawned, stretching the kinks out of her back.

"Yeah," Saphira confirmed, "but it's also the best and quickest way to learn. Sink or swim."

Amber made a face of distaste. "Yuck. Seems a little bit cruel. Glad it's not me." She yawned again. "I'm going to bed. Night, everyone." She headed upstairs with Coral right behind her. The rest followed her example and in a few minutes had scattered to whatever tasks were theirs to take care of. It wasn't long after Opal and Indi were gone that Jade came in the door, glad to shed her outerwear and pour herself a cup of coffee before taking a seat at the table beside Esmeralda.

"So how were they?"

Jade snorted. "They were a little bit like - you know what it's like when the putti want to attract the attention of the cherubim without seeming like they're trying to do so?" smiling when Esmeralda did the same as she nodded her understanding. "Right - it was a little bit like that. There was a weird little vibe going on though."

"Tell me."

************

"I haven't had this much fun shopping in ages," Brianna confessed as they seated themselves at a table inside a small café off the beaten path. The woman who had seated them returned immediately with a full coffee pot and waited for them both to nod before she poured. Then she left them alone to look at their menus. Charisma and Brianna both absently prepared their coffee as they settled their various bags around them.

"Oh, I agree. It's gotten to where I use a professional shopper most of the time."

Brianna's brows went into her hairline. "Really? I've never tried one of those."

Charisma shrugged. "I don't like shopping alone. And so often I don't have the time to spend just looking. So this has been a real treat."

"So we can plan to do this again?" Brianna asked, picking up her coffee cup and taking a satisfied sip. "Oh wow... that's good."

"Thank you, ma'am," the waitress replied as she returned. "What can I get for you ladies?"

They quickly turned their attention back to their menus, finally choosing the daily special. The waitress nodded her head and checked their cups, then scooted off towards the kitchen. They watched her go before turning their attention back to their conversation.

"I'd love to do this again," Charisma confessed. "I feel like...." She broke off, unwilling to finish that thought. Instead she said, "It reminds me of some of those weekends in college when we really didn't have money to spend, but we had all kinds of time to look."

"Oh yes - remember how that one store manager used to flinch when we walked into her store?"

Charisma laughed. "Yes - because we were always trying on but never buying. Then the designer asked if we'd be interested in modeling for charity? Did you know Hunter ran a background on the designer to make sure she was legit?"

Brianna's eyes widened. "Are you kidding me?"

"Not at all. Remember how excited I was - I called Mama," seeing Brianna nod. "Mama told Hunter and he had her checked out. I'm not sure what would have happened if he'd found out she was a fraud."

"I'm pretty sure I can imagine," Brianna replied. "C'mon, Ri... your brothers doted on you. Do you really think they'd let anything happen to you if they could prevent it?"

"You too," Charisma returned softly. At Brianna's puzzled expression, she elaborated. "They loved you too - still do, obviously. They looked out for you."

"They did," Brianna agreed. "They still do, sometimes to my dismay, but I wouldn't change it... or them. Thank you for sharing them with me, Ri. You'll never know the difference having them in my life made for me - though I never did try to take any of them shopping," she added, hoping to lighten things up before they got too serious. Though she knew that eventually they would have to talk, Brianna really didn't want anything that personal and private to take place in such a public venue. Charisma clearly agreed with her as she'd given a slightly strained laugh.

"Good choice there. According to each of my sisters-in-law, shopping with any of the boys is a chore beyond imagining. I much prefer to have an experience like we had today." They both sat back as the waitress approached with their food, and they waited for her to set it down and refill their cups before Brianna resumed the conversation.

"I'm just glad I found something to wear to this thing tonight. With any luck we can get in and out without anyone noticing." She took a bite and closed her eyes. "This is good."

"You didn't look in the mirror when you tried that dress on, did you? You looked fabulous, Bri. You're going to knock their socks off," Charisma said honestly. "Oh... no kidding - this *is* good."

"I hope not," returning to their discussion as she continued to enjoy her repast.

"Why not?" curious now.

"Because that would just complicate my life. And I don't need any more complications than I already have. Besides, alcohol makes people stupid, and you know how well I tolerate stupid."

Charisma smirked. "Did that ever get you into trouble in the DA's office?"

"Surprisingly, no," Brianna said with a laugh. "I had a reputation. It served me well. Besides, the cops felt like I did. The running joke was we needed a law against stupid to save ourselves a lot of time and paper work."

"At least we can limit our exposure to it tonight. I figure an hour or two and we can make a break for it."

"Sounds like a plan."



Chapter LXVII

Brianna smirked as she leaned against the doorjamb, watching Charisma dig through her purse for the keys she swore she had. They were just back from Gypsum's party, and it was closer to tomorrow morning than it was to last night. She wasn't sure what exactly they had accomplished by attending, but it had been... interesting. Brianna had learned all kinds of fascinating things through simple observation and listening. It was amazing what you could learn by staying sober when everyone around you was getting plastered.

Brianna turned her attention back to Charisma, a frown furrowing her brow as she wondered how much alcohol Charisma had consumed once they'd been separated. Since it had been a political party that had happened fairly early, as there was wheeling-dealing to be done and pacts to be made with the devil, though Brianna had stayed outside most of that simply due to her very junior status. Because despite the fact the she held a senior Senator's seat, she herself was considered a plebe. So she was free to wander from group to group and observe.

With an impatient sigh, she took the purse from Charisma and tucked it under her arm, then removed the keys from Charisma's hand. Brianna found the appropriate one and inserted it, then opened the door and motioned Charisma to enter with a flourish. Then she turned to wave Turq off as she followed and closed the door behind them.

Charisma set the alarm code, then accepted the keys from Brianna with a smirk, though the color of her skin told its own story. She stepped out of her shoes with a sigh and dropped her purse on the hall table, then headed straight for the kitchen. Brianna chuckled and followed suit, and consented to the water Charisma offered with a nod of her head.

"Man, that's good," she said after guzzling down half the bottle. "I think everything being served to night was at room temperature."

Charisma grimaced. "I think so too. I know my martini could have used a little more ice."

"Martini singular?" Brianna asked, causing Charisma's head to jerk up until Brianna found herself pinned by a bright blue stare. Brianna met her glare for glare and added an arched eyebrow for good measure. "Hey, you were the one who couldn't find the keys in your hand."

"Yes, martini singular," Charisma replied gruffly. "There was no way I was even getting slightly punch drunk tonight. There were too many sharks circling."

Brianna's second eyebrow joined the first in her hairline. "Trouble?" she asked, taking another swallow of water.

Charisma bit her lips thoughtfully as her eyes grew distant, then finally shrugged and brought her attention back to Brianna. "I'm not sure. I mean, I always keep an eye out at these functions - you never know what's brewing until the alcohol starts flowing. But there was a lot of weirdness tonight." She shook her head. "What did you think of your first political soiree?"

"I think these people need to work more and drink less," Brianna replied dryly without a second's hesitation. Charisma's burst into unexpected laughter and Brianna just stared at her with fond amusement. When Charisma was able to contain herself, she put a hand on Brianna's shoulder.

"Don't you ever go changing, Brianna Brianna. I love you just the way you are. Now," turning and scooping up her water bottle, "what do you say to calling it a night? I don't know about you, but I'm beat and ready to get out of these fancy clothes and into bed."

"Yeah... I've been ready to put on some comfortable clothes since I tried this dress on this morning," Brianna said in a slightly higher tone than normal. Though she knew Charisma meant nothing suggestive by it, Brianna's mind had taken Charisma's words as an invitation and gone to town with her libido. She cleared her throat and willed the images away. "Besides, I'd like to get a few z's before the sun comes up in a little while," gesturing towards the clock.

Charisma winced. "On the plus side, we don't have a schedule to keep tomorrow. Do you have anything going on Monday?"

Brianna tilted her head in thought. "Not that I can think of, but honestly, I'm not firing on all cylinders either at the moment."

"I can relate," Charisma said with a yawn. She wrapped her free hand around Brianna's arm and hauled her towards the door gently. "C'mon. I'm pretty sure I hear a couple beds calling our names," stopping to pick up her shoes and purse before maneuvering them up the stairs together. "I'll see you in the morning?" as they reached Brianna's room for the night.

"It won't be bright and early," Brianna chuckled, "But I'm pretty sure I'll be here when you get up."

Charisma hesitated, then lightly squeezed the arm she held before releasing her grip. She crossed the few steps that led to her room, giving Brianna a wave before she opened the door and entered. Brianna watched her go, then went into the guest room Charisma had given her. It only took a few minutes to remove the dress and brush her teeth. She was asleep before her head hit the pillow.

************

Kent entered the house some time later. He wasn't particularly quiet, but he didn't announce himself either as he had no expectation of anyone being in the house with him. He walked upstairs and went straight to his rooms, which were at the opposite side of the house from Charisma's. He looked around with an unbiased eye, recognizing that his space in this place was much like his apartment in New York - it was *his* space. He could still remember sharing space with Charisma, though that had ended once Adam had been born. And now that he considered it, it had been as much his decision as it had been her request. He spent a few minutes wondering why he'd let things come to this without taking some sort of decisive action one way or another.

Unwilling to waste time in pointless speculation, Kent went directly to the closet and grabbed his largest suitcase, opening it and placing it on the bed. Then he turned back to the room and began to consider the things he wanted to take with him to make his apartment more than a stopping point. It was time to make that his home.

He went downstairs to the family room first - there were a few pictures and mementos that he definitely wanted... things from before his time with Charisma as well as those that marked their years together. There weren't many, but there had been some good times, and he wanted something to remember them by.

Keepsakes in hand, he made his way back upstairs to begin his packing.

************

Coral arrived at the house at almost the identical minute that Mal did, having been sent by Amber the moment Kent had shown up to let Esmeralda know what was going on. Surprisingly, everyone was up and gathered around the table eating breakfast when the two of them walked into the kitchen side by side. Esmeralda took one look at both of them and motioned them to take a seat. Without a word, Saphira and Ruby rose and put two plates together while Opal poured them coffee. Saphira topped off her cup as well as Ruby's then they took spots behind Esmeralda leaning against the counters while the rest waited for Esmeralda to speak.

"I'm guessing that Kent is at Charisma's," glancing at Mal, "and Amber sent you to make sure I knew."

"Pretty much, yeah. I stuck around long enough to see him grab a suitcase." Coral turned and met Mal's eyes. "Where were you? We figured we'd see you as soon as he showed up."

"You would have if I hadn't been trying to get a hold of someone here. Is the phone off the hook or something? Because I kept getting a busy signal."

Esmeralda frowned. "I don't think so. Phira?"

"I'm on it," Saphira said as she padded out into the hall. "Oh," she said after a moment's inspection. "It appears we disconnected the phone from the wall jack at some point. Not really sure what that's all about. But it's fixed now."

"Thank you, love," Esmeralda said as Saphira re-entered the room. Saphira gently squeezed her shoulder, but didn't say anything as she resumed her sentinel position behind Esmeralda. Esmeralda looked back at the two newcomers, and focused her attention on Mal once more. "So I take it Amber sent you as soon as she saw you?"

"Pretty much. Said she'd keep an eye on things - that I needed to get here and find out why the phone lines weren't working."

"Did you see anything?" Ruby asked, startling Esmeralda and everyone else seated around the table. "I mean, we know he got out a suitcase - did you see him put anything in it?"

"Just some oddball stuff," Mal offered with a frown. "I was downstairs when I was trying to call you - I knew he couldn't leave without going by me, so I figured I was safe enough there, ya know?" seeing the nods of agreement. "Instead, when he came downstairs he went into the den and gathered up some things... mostly pictures... and headed straight back to his room. By that point I figured someone must be on the phone since I couldn't get through, so I followed him. That's when I met Amber and she told me she'd stay until I could get back to relieve her or Opal and Indi showed up."

"All right, ladies," Esmeralda said with a smile at Opal and Indi. "Go get ready to start your day. As soon as Mal's done with breakfast, you can leave together. I know it doesn't matter when you're ethereal and not using earthly transportation, but I'd feel better if you would all stick together."

"You think something's gonna happen?" Saphira asked, a concerned frown covering her face.

"I certainly hope not," Esmeralda said fervently. "But Mal has been on her own for a few weeks except for her few dashing visits back here while Kent was shadowing Charisma. It won't hurt to let her enjoy a few minutes of company with us... or them," gesturing to Opal and Indi who had stopped at the door when Saphira voiced her concerns. "Besides, I'm fairly certain Charisma and Brianna will spend most of their day indoors after last night. And speaking of which," she added, turning to Coral, "how was that little get together?"

"Brianna could write a tell-all book just on the things she learned last night and she'd be able to retire on the profits from it... let alone the movie rights. Charisma... well, you'll pretty much have to talk to Amber. They got split up almost immediately, and it was only when Charisma went in search of Brianna so they could leave that they were together again."

"Like culling the herd?"

"I'm not sure that's the right analogy," Coral replied slowly. "Charisma was pulled into the movers and shakers who were trying to put together some sort of deal. Brianna was basically left to her own devices - they don't see her as part of them, nor do they think she's a threat. After all, she's only a place saver right? How much damage can she do?"

Esmeralda smirked. "They have no idea who she really is, do they?"

Coral's laughter was contagious and it went around the table swiftly. "No... and I don't think she's going to let them know until it's too late."

"I wonder if Charisma is even aware."

"I doubt it. It's not something her family would have shared before, and they won't share now, thinking it's Brianna's place to do so if she thinks she should."

Saphira cleared her throat and shook her head. "And the hits just keep on coming."

************

It was the sound of a door closing that brought Kent out of the brown study he'd fallen into as he went through his rooms choosing things to take back to Manhattan with him. His brow furrowed and he wondered if he was just imagining things. Charisma wasn't supposed to be home today, was she? He was pretty sure she hadn't mentioned anything to him, but there was a lot of her life he wasn't privy to, he was discovering.

He heard a second door close and went to his door, intending to let Charisma know he was home and see if perhaps she wanted to join him for brunch somewhere later. His packing could wait - after all, he was on his own schedule for getting things moved, and maybe if he and Charisma talked, they might resolve a few things. At least Kent would know for certain where he stood instead of coming to his own conclusions - though he was the first to admit that his conclusions were sound and backed by the evidence of his own eyes and ears.

When he reached the door and opened it, however, he discovered - not Charisma - but Brianna Walker making her way slowly down the stairs. She paused along the way, looking at the pictures hung along its length, and Kent wondered what she thought about them. Most of them were of Adam as he grew, but a few of them were of them as a family.

He watched until she was far enough down the staircase that her head disappeared from view. Only then did he close the door and resume his packing, wondering curiously what would change if he announced his presence in the house.

He let himself contemplate that scenario for a long moment, then shook his head. He had a feeling it would only make them all uncomfortable. So he decided to finish his packing and wait until they were engrossed in whatever they had planned for the day before he took his leave. He doubted Charisma would even notice the rental car parked by the garage unless they went out. And judging from the lateness of the hour, he doubted that would happen for a while. If it did, well... he'd figure it out when it happened. He had enough to consider at the moment.

The scent of coffee wafting up the stairs made his stomach growl and Kent realized he was more than a little ravenous. He turned his attention back to his half-filled luggage - the sooner he was done, the sooner he could get a bite to eat.

************

"Morning," Charisma offered handing Brianna a cup of coffee as she crossed the threshold into the kitchen. Brianna inhaled deeply, a satisfied smile crossing her face before she allowed herself that first fulfilling sip. "How'd you sleep?"

"Ahhhh...." Brianna breathed. "That's wonderful," arching a brow at Charisma's cocky smirk. "What?? It's good coffee - this is made just the way I like it."

"I was hoping I remembered correctly," Charisma said.

"Oh yeah... this is perfect. Thank you, Ri."

"Welcome anytime, Bri... you know that. Now, how'd you sleep?"

"Wonderfully if not nearly long enough. I don't know how you keep this pace."

Charisma snorted. "What pace? We're off as often as we're working."

"Maybe, but even when you're off, there's always something going on."

"Wasn't it that way with the law as well? Especially once you started working for the DA's office?"

"Not like this," Brianna admitted. "There's politics, and then there's POLITICS. And politics doesn't involve nearly as much schmoozing as POLITICS does. However," she added before Charisma could break in, "I'm learning a lot. It's funny thing things you see and hear when you're an observer in a room full of posturers. I could write a book."

Charisma snorted. "I'll just bet you could. Of course, for your own safety, you'd have to live in another country once it was published."

"Yeah, but imagine the made-for-TV movie it'd make."

"You are very, very bad."

"Thank you," Brianna accepted with a smirk. "I've been perfecting my technique for years."

"Well, if worse comes to worst, you can sell it on eBay."

"Oh no you didn't," Brianna stated flatly. Charisma laughed.

"Sure I did. It was easy." She reached for Brianna's coffee cup. "You want another?"

Brianna hesitated for a split second before she nodded. "I shouldn't, but yes, please."

"All right. It'll take a couple minutes. Why don't you go upstairs and grab your album then meet me at my office door? It's the room you found me in that night...." trailing off with a sense of relief when Brianna nodded her head in understanding. "Good... see you in a few then?"

"You betcha. Be right back."

Brianna left the kitchen and headed back upstairs slowly, still fascinated by the pictures that lined the wall. Many of them were of Adam, but there were a few of the three of them - posed studio pictures, but lovely shots nonetheless. Brianna smiled, though there was as much sadness in her heart as there was happiness. She was glad that Charisma was happy - she just wished she had been the one to put the smile on her face. With a shrug, Brianna straightened her shoulders and put her fruitless thoughts behind her. Then she entered the guest room she was using and claimed the photo album that held the memories she still held dear to her heart, and without a backwards glance, ran lightly down the stairs to meet Charisma.

Maybe she could finally lay these ghosts to rest.

************

Kent finished with his packing just as he heard Brianna make her way down the stairs once more. He wondered what was so important that she felt the need to break one of Charisma's cardinal rules and run down the stairs. He was a little surprised he didn't hear Charisma say something about it as even he had been admonished for it a time or two. Of course, Adam didn't seem to be around, so perhaps it wasn't quite as important to worry about setting a good example.

Regardless, Kent looked around the rooms once more, then nodded his head in satisfaction and zipped his suitcase closed. He hefted it with a bit of a grunt, and headed downstairs. With a bit of luck they would be engrossed in whatever and he'd be able to make a clean getaway.

They were neatly ensconced on the couch in Charisma's study, heads bent together over something he couldn't see but that obviously meant a lot to both of them. He stood off to one side of the doorway, realizing that once again Charisma had left the door open thinking she was alone in the house except for the company she was obviously sharing in her private space - bringing home again just how little of her life he actually shared.

He sighed as he watched them, seeing more than they probably realized they showed. There was amusement and adoration and love that flowed between them like a palpable thing, even though nothing untoward was going on. They weren't sitting too close or gazing too long - and yet it was clear to him that there was certainly more between them than simple friendship.

He wondered if he should fight for his wife... for their marriage and family. Then he saw a smile that hadn't graced her face once in the years they had known one another. And he picked up his bag and walked through the kitchen towards the garage. He had places to be.



Chapter LXVIII

Brianna accepted her coffee from Charisma as soon as she reached the bottom of the stairs, eyebrows popping when Charisma put a key in the lock of her study door before opening it and ushering Brianna in ahead of her.

"Adam," Charisma said succinctly, leading the way over to the sofa. She set her mug on the table next to the album she'd moved downstairs the day before, prior to Brianna's arrival. Brianna followed her example, easing the thick book onto the table and placing her cup beside it.

"Adam?"

"You were wondering why the door was kept locked - Adam." Charisma took a seat and motioned Brianna to do the same, smiling when Brianna dropped onto the couch beside her. "When Adam was first learning to get around - crawling and walking - we discovered no place was safe from him." Charisma sighed. "I've always kept this room closed and Kent has always respected that. This is my space - I do a lot of work in here and before Adam was born, I conducted a lot of business with my colleagues here as well. Not as much anymore, but there was a time this place was utilized almost as much as my office on the Hill."

Brianna looked around and nodded. "I can see that."

Charisma laughed. "Oh it was much more pretentious at one time - very awe-inspiring," she added with a dramatic roll of her eyes. "But once Adam came along, I started changing it. I had to. There were times he had to be in here with me regardless of what else was going on around me. And then he started being mobile."

"I take it was a steep learning curve."

Charisma snorted. "I really hadn't thought about it - I mean... he was a baby, right? How much harm could he do?" She shook her head and smiled wryly when Brianna erupted into undisguised hilarity. "I didn't even realize he was big enough or coordinated enough to open the door on his own, but I completely underestimated the force of his determination."

"What did he get into?"

"Fortunately, nothing that could hurt him, and nothing that wasn't fairly easy to replace. It took a week to get all the ink off of his skin, and I did have to replace the carpet in here."

"Which is why it's a nice deep burgundy."

"And why my printer cartridges are currently in a locked drawer out of his reach."

Brianna chuckled. "Would you have believed this? If ten or fifteen years ago someone had told you we'd be sitting here having coffee together, laughing over the antics of your son, would you have believed them?"

"I'd have had them committed," Charisma returned dryly, though Brianna could see the latent pain in the back of her blue eyes. "For any number of reasons," she added as a belated afterthought. "I mean I wasn't even married ten years ago, and you KNOW what Mama would have done if I'd come home pregnant without a husband."

"It would have sucked to have been you," Brianna said sagely.

Charisma chuckled. "No kidding." She leaned forward, snagging her coffee cup in one hand and her album in the other. "C'mon... we need a starting place to begin catching up, and I think the beginning is probably going to be the best place."

Brianna took a deep breath and nodded, then followed Charisma's example - clutching her mug in one hand and grasping the book with the other. Then they leaned back and looked at one another, and as though touched by the same unseen hand, they opened the albums to the first picture... and sat looking in silence for a long moment before exclamations overcame them.

Not surprisingly, the first picture in both albums was similar - them at the airport, arms wrapped around each other waving wildly at the camera. They stared at the photographs, then looked at one another.

"Mama O gave it to me when I went to see her that first time after...." Brianna broke off and Charisma nodded her understanding. "I couldn't say no - especially since it reminded me how happy we'd been setting off on that trip of a lifetime."

"When did you put your album together?" Charisma asked suddenly, her curiosity overriding her prudence. Brianna frowned and pursed her lips in thought.

"Not long after I came home, I guess. I was at law school, and I was... truthfully, I was depressed. Now I'll admit that it was my own fault - I mean, I was the one who walked way, and I'm the one that decided I could suffer three New England winters to get my JD from an Ivy League school - but that knowledge didn't make me *less* depressed. It was after my first family holiday without you, but before Christmas...." Brianna closed her eyes and let herself travel back across the years she and Charisma had been apart. Those first had been the most painful, so they were harder to dredge up.

"Bri... it's not critical if it hurts you to remember," Charisma offered softly. Brianna opened her eyes and gave Charisma a sad smile.

"It does, but I think it's good to remember. I think it's time these memories were purged. Maybe it will eradicate the pain and we can replace them with happier thoughts."

"If you're sure...."

"I am." Brianna scrunched up her forehead. "It was right before finals and I couldn't focus on anything. So I called Mama O. I didn't know whom else to call. I mean I had made a few friends in law school, but it wasn't anything serious at that point. We were all still feeling our way around the whole law school thing and worried about projects and grades and it was just a whole lot of craziness at the time."

"You did make friends, though... right?" Charisma broke in unexpectedly.

"Oh yes," Brianna assured her. "It got easier after the first semester - we had time to do more than eat sleep and breathe the law. I think they use that semester to weed out all the candidates that see big bucks without seeing all the work that goes into it."

Charisma dipped her head in acknowledgement. "I think all the programs beyond a bachelor level tend towards that. Saves a lot of grief if you get out early."

"Saves a lot of student loan debt," Brianna agreed wryly. Charisma laughed, then waved her hand in a 'continue' motion.

"I'm sorry I interrupted. Please go on."

"Where was I?" Brianna asked, rubbing her forehead. "Oh yes - calling Mama O," she responded before Charisma had a chance to react. "I needed someone to talk to before I blew every chance I had of earning my JD to holy hell. So I picked up the phone and dialed Okasa without even hesitating. I don't remember what we talked about anymore - settling in, my studies, the family - I'm sure they were all part of the conversation at one point. I do remember - near the end of the discussion - she mentioned you and told me how you were doing. She knew I needed to know, I guess, but she also knew I was too proud and too stubborn to ever ask."

"What did she tell you? Do you remember?"

"Just that Washington suited you and you seemed to be winning friends and influencing people already... even as a Congressional aide."

"I was, you know. And I made sure to get pictures with all of them... for two reasons."

"Which were?" Brianna asked when Charisma let the silence drag on. Charisma smirked and Brianna rolled her eyes.

"The first was of course for my own benefit - so I could show my brothers that I really did meet Presidents and foreign dignitaries and lesser political beings like Senators and Congressmen."

"And the second?"

"I knew I'd need them for that tell-all book you would write about me someday."

"Uh huh," Brianna drawled out so slowly Charisma despaired of her actually finishing the word. "And you were so sure I'd write that story... despite everything that had happened?"

"Yes," Charisma stated emphatically. "You promised, and I knew that despite everything, you'd keep that promise when the time came. Of course, I have to become President first."

"Never say never, Ri."

Charisma shrugged. "We'll see. I'm not always sure I want it anymore. Adam changed a lot for me."

Brianna held her gaze for a long moment. "I guess he did," was her only comment.

Charisma looked down at the albums and realized they hadn't even turned a page yet. "Good grief - at the rate we're going, my son will have graduated from the Naval Academy before we get done."

"The Naval Academy?" Brianna asked. "Should I ask where that came from?"

"It's Kent's dream for Adam. He always wanted to go, but he didn't qualify scholastically. Adam may not want that for himself, and when the time comes, he'll choose his own path. But for the time being, we can use Kent's dream for him."

"It's a nice dream," was all Brianna said.

"Shall we?" Charisma asked readying the sheet to turn the page. Brianna did the same and bobbed her head, and together they moved to the next picture... and the next memory... in their books.

************

There had been a lot of laughter and a lot of tears as they slowly made their way across Europe through their memories. They were almost halfway when they reached Rome and Brianna shivered in pure reaction when she saw the photo Charisma had in her album. Charisma looked up in concern, then grimaced when she noticed Brianna's unnatural paleness. She rapidly closed the book and set it on the table, then slid Brianna's from her lap. A moment later, she was chafing Brianna's cold fingers between her warmer ones.

"Oh God, Bri... I'm so sorry. I didn't even think...."

Brianna blinked and took a deep breath, then she squeezed Charisma's hands lightly as she met her eyes. "It's okay, Ri. I should have realized you might have pictures of the Coliseum - it is an impressive structure, after all."

"Yeah, but I should have remembered how you reacted to the real thing when we were there and taken that picture out or something."

"Charisma, it's all right. I didn't even think about it; and I certainly didn't expect to react that violently to a photograph."

"Are you all right now?"

Brianna nodded. "I think so. It was like I was there again." She shook her head to clear the thought. "I like it here much better."

"Me too. You want to keep going or do you need a time out?"

Brianna cocked her eyebrow and smirked. "You are such a mom. A time out?"

Charisma chuckled. "At least I didn't offer you the time-out chair," motioning to a kid's size chair next to her desk. "I'm pretty sure you'd be more uncomfortable than Adam is when he sits there."

Brianna looked at the chair and then back to Charisma. "I'm pretty sure my knees would be up around my ears," recognizing Charisma's tactics and appreciating the effort. "How about a bio break and maybe a snack stop before we start again?"

"Sounds like a plan. Meet you back in here in fifteen?"

Brianna wasn't gone that long, but Charisma had removed the Coliseum picture from her album and had snacks out on the table by the time Brianna made it back in the room.

"Better?" she asked solicitously, though a smile graced her features as she noted the color that had returned to Brianna's face.

"Much, thank you. Now where were we?"

Charisma opened her album once more, to a picture of the two of them at the Vatican. A lovely old nun had offered to take their photograph in front of the Pieta. They had been appropriately somber for the picture, in deference to the older woman's serious devotion as well as the stunning beauty of the work itself.

"Is it wrong," Brianna asked in a hushed voice, "that I found that to be the most amazing thing about the Vatican?"

"I hope not. I felt much the same way... as though its sheer simplicity was much grander than the obscene displays of wealth."

Brianna's eyebrows flew into her hairline at Charisma's tone of disgust. "I thought you were a good Catholic."

"I am a recovering Catholic. I have found parts of the religion that do not mesh with my faith. So I don't practice that religion anymore... except to attend holiday mass with the family when we're there. It keeps Mama happy, and I don't think it hurts anything."

"Oooo-kaaay," Brianna drawled slowly, letting her nod communicate that she did understand the intent of what Charisma was saying even if she wasn't quite clear on the details. "So any other pictures of Rome in that book?" she asked.

"Of course," Charisma said with a smile. "Augustus' tomb, the Baths, the Spanish Steps...."

"So let's see them," Brianna goaded with a smile of her own. "C'mon... you show me yours, I'll show you mine."

Charisma imagined and discarded several retorts before deciding to say, "Oh... you sweet talker you. Show me what you've got."

Brianna answered by reopening her album and Charisma did the same. Then they stopped and blinked at the pages that were facing them. Similar pictures this time, but noticeably different as well. They stood in front of Trevi Fountain. In Brianna's they were facing the camera, arms wrapped tightly around one another as they were caught in a moment of laughter after having thrown their coins into the fountain.

Charisma's however....

"I don't remember that being taken," Brianna said softly, keeping her eyes on the page. Charisma glanced at the page, then focused her eyes on the far wall, hoping it would give her the answers she needed. Brianna's voice didn't sound accusing, but it did sound a little lost. Charisma took a deep breath, then started to speak.

"I'm not quite sure when that was taken. You remember the lovely little girl that offered to take our pictures - we gave her our cameras," seeing Brianna's nod out of the corner of her eye. "I *think* she took a picture using my camera first, because I'm almost positive that was just before we turned to throw our coins over our shoulders."

"Did you have two pictures in front of the fountain?"

Charisma shook her head. "No... just the one." She took another deep breath. "I've always felt like it was trying to tell me something, but...." She shrugged. "I don't know." Finally she turned and looked at Brianna whose focus was still on the photograph in front of the fountain.

"Do you think I could have a copy of this?"

"Sure... absolutely - as long as I can have a copy of yours as well." Charisma paused. "That was such a magical night, you know? Everything about that trip was wonderful, but if I close my eyes, I can still hear the hawkers and smell the garlic and taste the gelato... well, not all at once of course," grinning at the mental picture she'd painted. "But I remember so clearly the rushing sound of the water; the lights and the shadows they cast; your smile; our laughter...." Charisma sucked in a breath as truth dawned and recognition bloomed in her eyes. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Charisma?"

"Why didn't you tell me that you loved me?"

"I...."

"Don't!!" fierce and commanding. "Don't play semantics with me about this. You know what I mean. Why didn't you tell me that you were in love with me??" She didn't even give Brianna the chance to respond; Charisma shot off the sofa and crossed to the dark fireplace, absently wishing for flames to gaze into. "Why didn't I see it? I mean..." flinging her arm in the direction of the albums, "it seems so obvious. How did I miss this??" Charisma turned back to the empty grate, keeping her eyes fastened there as though they would give her the answers she sought. When she heard movement behind her, Charisma's head shot up, and she glared balefully at Brianna.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"I was...."

"I'd think very carefully about my answer if I was you." A beat. "You were running way from me again, weren't you?"

"I was just going to give you...."

"This was why you left me before, wasn't it?" Charisma broke in again, running her hand through her hair in agitation. She pinned Brianna with her eyes, and Brianna willingly held Charisma's gaze. "You promised you'd be honest with me - that you'd tell me why you left me that day in Barcelona if I asked the right question," waiting for Brianna to nod. "Did you walk away from me because you loved me?"

Brianna took a deep breath, but never dropped her eyes from Charisma's. "Yes," she replied steadily.




Chapter LXIX

To say the expression on Charisma's face was flummoxed would be an understatement of massive proportions, but to her credit, she held Brianna's eyes while a myriad of emotions swirled in her eyes. Finally, they slowed, though Brianna couldn't rightly read what was left when Charisma took a deep breath before consciously relaxing her shoulders.

"Okay," she said after a long moment of silence, accepting Brianna's confession as the truth it was. "Where do we go from here?"

"Where do you want to go, Charisma? The ball's in your court."

"How do you figure?"

"You know now why I left twenty years ago, and like it or not, it's going to change the way you see me and how you interact with me... if it hasn't already. Do I make you uncomfortable now? Does it bother you to be in the same room with me?"

Charisma studied Brianna for a few minutes, and Brianna kept her eyes focused on Charisma's. If she was going to be judged for who she was, Brianna was going to make damn sure every measure counted. It was hard to hear anything over the thudding of her heart, however, and she almost missed Charisma's response.

"No."

Brianna blinked when she realized that Charisma mouth had moved and sound had issued forth from it. "Excuse me?"

Charisma smiled gently, understanding all too well exactly just how off-balance Brianna felt at the moment. "No... you don't make me uncomfortable and it doesn't bother me to share space with you. I would never have guessed... obviously - I didn't get it for the better part of twenty years, and only then when I was hit in the face with it... so to speak. I'm not sure I get the appeal - after all, you know me better than anyone in the world... or you did then. I'm not sure why you'd want to be with someone like me."

"You're kidding, right?" almost a flat statement.

"Um... no?"

Brianna snorted and shook her head. "Remind me some day, and we'll sit down and I'll explain it to you, all right?" watching Charisma nod slowly, trying to find understanding in Brianna's words. When Charisma's brow crinkled, Brianna continued. "Trust me, Charisma - it's a story best left to another day. When you have a chance to sit down and think about all this, you're going to have questions. And frankly I'd rather not have to go through this over and over and over again as you think of new things to ask me."

"I do have one question I think I need to have answered now," Charisma said, deliberately moving to sit on the couch and patting the seat beside her.

Brianna sighed, having a very good idea what was coming. Still, she took a seat next to Charisma - not too close, but within reach. Charisma gave her a withering look and tugged her closer. "*You're* the one letting this change us, Brianna Brianna, and I won't let you do that... unless it makes you uncomfortable that I know the truth."

"But you still want to know if I still love you, don't you? Even if I'm uncomfortable."

Charisma's eyes widened as her brows slid upwards. "Um... while I would actually like to know that, to tell you the honest truth - it wasn't the question I was going to ask."

"Oh... um...."

"Brianna - it's just you and me here. And like you said, we're going to have to figure out a time and a place to talk about all this. There's a lot that I need to understand and a lot you probably need to share. I'd like to know what the family thinks and what Mama said to you and of course, we still have twenty years of life and memories to catch up on. That being said - what I'd really need to know is why you ran away... why you were running away from me again."

Brianna took a deep breath. Nothing like starting with the tough stuff, she thought wryly. Then she looked at Charisma squarely, figuring brutal honesty was her best bet. Charisma would appreciate the truthful part, if not the manner in which it was delivered.

"I knew the first time... when I figured out that what I felt for you went beyond friendship... I knew that if I put you in the position of having to choose, I wouldn't be the one to get chosen. You couldn't have chosen me then even if you'd felt as I did - too much of your career depends on your image - and I knew in no uncertain terms that you didn't love me the way I loved you. You told me as much point blank." She held up her hands when Charisma opened her mouth. "Please, Charisma - let me finish. This is hard enough for me."

"Okay."

"I also knew I couldn't stay. I couldn't be around you - not knowing that what I felt for you would never be returned. I was unwilling to become a martyr... for my sake as well as yours. Unrequited love is one thing - twisting a knife in it day after day wasn't something I was prepared to live with. And by leaving, I could pretend that we were still best friends - that my falling in love with you hadn't changed things between us."

When the silence dragged on, Charisma spoke. "So you were running away this time because...."

"I really wasn't sure how you were going to react. And while I didn't expect violence, I thought you might need some time and space to process," waving her hand around, "all this."

"I'm sure I will need some time and space to process all this, as you put it. But I'd rather you didn't run away from me again... ever. We'll get through this, Brianna Brianna. I have faith."

Brianna nodded. "I hope so... because I missed having you in my life." She reached forward and closed her album, pulling it into her lap and folding her hands on top of it. "However, I'm going to go now, and give you a chance to think about all this and the differences it will make in your life and your way of thinking. I know we still have to finish going through our albums, and we have a lot of other things to talk about besides. But first I think you could probably use a little time to ponder things. I'll still be around if and when you're ready to talk, and you know where to find me." Brianna rose from her seat and Charisma did the same.

"Are you sure?" biting her lip.

"Aren't you?" smiling wistfully when Charisma's head bobbed her acknowledgement slowly. "All right, then - let me go grab my stuff from upstairs, and I'll get out of your hair."

"I really liked having you here, Bri - it was like old times."

"Yes, it was - I enjoyed being here. Maybe we can do it again sometime."

"I'd like that a lot," Charisma replied before she could censor her words. Brianna disappeared upstairs before Charisma could become embarrassed, and slipped back downstairs almost immediately. "That was quick."

"Practice." She paused a moment, then resumed her speech. "Listen, there's one more thing you should know right now - it's going to be the only way you'll be able to figure things out completely." Brianna put her hand on the doorknob, praying Jas had been nearby when she called and she wouldn't have too wait too long for her arrival. "I do love you, Charisma - I think I always will. But I'm not a home wrecker. So if you decide that we can make this friendship work again, I'll need to talk to Kent. I won't give him a reason to misunderstand our friendship because of my love for you."

Charisma would have answered - if she could have gotten words past her suddenly closed throat. And if she'd had *any* idea what sort of response to make to Brianna's declaration. Or if Brianna hadn't escaped from her home as soon as the words were out of her mouth.

Charisma stood stunned for a few moments, hand at her throat as though trying to ease the pressure enough to draw a deep breath. When she realized Brianna was no longer in the room, Charisma shook her head and yanked the door open....

... only to see taillights at the end of her driveway as Jas readied to pull the car onto the road. Another moment and they were gone. Charisma took a deep breath and closed the door. Maybe it was time to talk to Mama.

************

"So did she call Okasa?" Esmeralda asked Indi some time later. They were all scattered around the living room, though Indigo and Opal had been holding court for quite a bit as she recounted their afternoon watching Charisma and Brianna.

"No... at least not in the remaining time that I was with her. When Brianna left with Jas, Charisma stayed leaned up against the door for a few minutes muttering to herself. When she finally straightened, she walked back into the study and resumed her place on the couch, glaring at the album like it had caused the situation. Honestly, Es... I would have laughed if things weren't as serious as they are." She shrugged. "As it is, she was making me a little seasick."

Esmeralda frowned. "How so?"

"I have a question first," waiting for Esmeralda to signal her to go ahead. "Is Charisma a paranoid schizophrenic or multiple personality?"

Esmeralda blinked so rapidly Indi expected her to take flight. A glance at Opal showed she was plainly shocked by the question by the way her jaw swung unhinged. Esmeralda shook her head. "No, Indi... not at all. Why do you ask?"

"Because," Indi sighed deeply, "her actions this afternoon were beyond what I'd consider reasonable."

"Okay. What did she do that you consider unreasonable?"

"She was like a mad woman, Es. First she cried a little and then she smiled and hugged the album to her like it was a precious child. Then she cried some more and then she got angry - not the good kind of angry either. Then she cried some more and looked through her pictures with that odd little sentimental smile on her face - you know the kind I'm talking about. Then she got mad again, and this time instead of muttering invectives, she paced and ranted and clenched her fists. Then she sat down and cried - and this time the crying was a deluge."

"And after that?" Opal finally asked when the silence had gone on too long for her comfort. She looked around and saw everyone staring at her as though she'd lost her marbles... everyone except for Esmeralda. She nodded her approval of Opal's question, and relieved, Opal turned back to Indi, waiting for an answer. Indi gave her a half-smile.

"How did you know?"

"Because I know Charisma. She may rant and rave and act like a lunatic by herself for a little while in the privacy of her own home - let's face it... we all have to vent from time to time. But she is far too much of a control freak to let anyone or anything wrest that control from her for very long. If she had a good, long cry, she got the release she needed. Even if the situation hasn't been dealt with, she's under control again, and things can move forward."

Esmeralda nodded her approval of Opal's summation. "I agree. A lot of the outcome will depend on how true her words to Brianna were. Because let's face it - Brianna was correct when she told Charisma that the knowledge would change how Charisma thought of Brianna as a person and how she perceived their relationship... even one of friendship."

"Yeah, but I really admire Brianna's tenacity. She didn't back down and she didn't take the easy road out by glossing over things or leaving things unsaid. She laid it all on the line."

"I don't think Charisma expected that," Opal replied to Indi's observation though she was looking at Esmeralda when she said it. Esmeralda cocked her head in a listening attitude and waited for Opal to continue. "I got the impression she figured she'd get an answer to her first question - when she asked Brianna if she left all those years ago because she loved her. Brianna promised to tell her the truth if and when she ever actually asked the right question, and as far as I can tell - except for saying goodbye - Brianna has never broken a promise to Charisma. But she seemed completely overwhelmed by the thoroughness of Brianna's response."

"Could she have done the same?" The question caused all eyes to swing in Saphira's direction. Saphira shrugged. "What??" looking around the room. "It seems like a fair question."

"It is a fair question. I don't think she could," Esmeralda stated quietly. "Given what we know of her history and behavior, probably not... even now."

"So she'll prove Brianna right?"

"I didn't say that," Esmeralda replied to the anguish in Saphira's voice as much as her words. "Charisma has grown and changed in the years they've been apart just like Brianna has. The difference is she has only half-lived - a large part of herself missing and hidden away because she refuses to see what she knows is true."

"I dunno, Boss - you didn't see bewildered look on Charisma's face when Brianna confirmed that she loved her," Indi offered hesitantly.

"But was it because of WHAT she said or the fact that she SAID IT at all?" Esmeralda glanced at all the confused expressions looking back at her and sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose in an effort to relieve the tension headache she could feel building behind her eyes. Without a word, Saphira moved from her spot next to the fireplace and padded over to stand behind Esmeralda. Saphira rested her hands on narrow shoulders and felt Esmeralda relax beneath her touch.

For a few minutes this went on, until Esmeralda reached up and covered Saphira's hands with her own. Saphira stopped her kneading, but didn't remove her hands from Esmeralda's body. She smiled when Esmeralda leaned back into her, and when she tilted her head back to meet Saphira's eyes with her own, the world ceased to exist outside of the two of them for a long moment.

Then Ruby cleared her throat and brought their attention back to the women in the room with them, trying valiantly to look anywhere but at the two of them. Esmeralda colored delicately; Saphira merely raised an impertinent eyebrow.

"I'm sorry to interrupt you two lovebirds," she said with a sarcastic smirk, "but we're obviously missing something that you're seeing, Es. Can you share with the rest of us? 'Cause I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who feels like an idiot at the moment," getting nods of agreement from around the room.

Esmeralda cleared her throat and nodded, then looked first at Opal, then at Indi. "I want you two to concentrate for just a minute. I want you to think about what you saw when Brianna made her initial confession... when Charisma asked if that was why she walked away. I want you to focus on the expression on Charisma's face - did you both see it?"

"I did."

"Me too."

"All right... now think. Was she really surprised by the *answer* Brianna gave? Was she surprised to hear Brianna loved her? Or was she more surprised that Brianna GAVE her an honest answer?"

Opal and Indi let their sight turn inward as they replayed the incident in their mind's eye. Then they looked at one another, and Opal motioned for Indi to speak first.

"I think she *was* surprised to hear that Brianna left her because she loved her because she's refused to see that for twenty years. But I think the flabbergasted look on her face was probably because she actually got an answer... much more of an answer than she ever expected to hear."

"Opal?"

"I think Indi's right. She got caught flatfooted by Brianna's confession of love, but I got the feeling she was more surprised that Brianna admitted to it." She paused and bit her lip; Esmeralda simply waited. "I think she knew - in the depths of her mind or the recesses of her heart or whatever - she knew why Brianna said goodbye. But she was totally sucker punched by the fact that Brianna just put it out there for her to see... even if it was twenty years too late."

"You think it was too late?" Turq asked.

"I think we wouldn't all be here now if it was. But that doesn't mean we won't get our happy ending; it just means we have to work at it a little harder."

Esmeralda waited until she was sure Opal was done, then she turned to Jas. "How was Brianna in all of this? How was the drive home?"

"Stiff," she replied succinctly, running a hand through her hair. "She called me while she was upstairs packing her bag. I was close, like you told me, so when she stepped outside, I was waiting with the door open, ready for her."

"Wait... how'd you get in the locked gates?"

"Kent left and I drove in. I was waiting at the bottom of the drive."

"Very clever," Saphira said approvingly. Jas blushed.

"Well, we're supposed to keep the Angel stuff to a minimum when we're in mortal form. I'm trying to play by the rules."

"You did good, Jas... real good. But how was Brianna stiff? Like she was trying not to cry or she was angry or...?"

"More like she was trying to hold herself together. I don't think she was trying not to cry, but she was shaking like a leaf... like there was a sudden release of tension in her body and she wasn't really sure how to live without it."

"That's probably exactly what it was. Remember, she's lived with this secret for half her life."

"So she's relieved...?"

"And terrified and happy and any one of a hundred other things. It'll be interesting to hear Coral's take on her in the morning."

"I've gotta tell you, Es - except for the fact that you actually look better and more rested because of this time off, I am hating this break thing," Opal confessed. "It was easier to keep an eye on them and things as they happened when we were with them in an office setting. There was consistency there that I could appreciate instead of winging it like we are now."

"Oh Opal... we've always been winging it," Esmeralda offered with a smile. "And you are all doing a great job juggling things around for this holiday. I suspect you and the rest will be going back to work before I will." She held up a hand to stop the concerned mutters around the room. "Not because of my health, guys. Think a minute - even while they've been out of session, most of the House and Senate have been working, right?" seeing everyone nod slowly. "So I figure you'll be going back sooner than expected so that when they 'officially' resume business, they'll be caught up and ready to go."

"I hope it's soon, then," Opal muttered. "This is driving me nuts."

"Short trip," Ruby snarked, laughing at Opal's look of indignation. Still, it was enough to break the tension in the room, and they headed to their rooms to settle in for the night in a much better frame of mind than they'd been in a while. It was a good feeling.



Chapter LXX

"So she knows now? You told her the truth?"

"She knows why I left her all those years ago - she knows that I love her," Brianna answered.

"And what was her reaction?"

"She was pretty calm and rational about it all really, Mama O. Acted like it wasn't that big of a deal...."

"But...?" Okasa hesitated, waiting to see if Brianna would continue her thought on her own. When she didn't, Okasa prodded a little bit. "C'mon, Little Bri... remember who you're talking to. She really acted like you didn't just change the very foundation of her world?"

Brianna bit her lip and shook her head, then realized Okasa couldn't see her through the phone line. "No. I left before it really sank in, I guess. Charisma deserved the chance to think about what I said and how it would change things for her - because despite everything, we both know that it will." She paused. "On the other hand, she did seem a little shocked that I actually told her the truth."

"Did you think she was surprised that you love her?"

"Maybe a little that I still do, but mostly I got the feeling she was more astounded by the fact that I actually admitted it."

"And how are you? How do you feel about all this?"

"Honestly, Mama? I think I'm more relieved than anything else. It's like... I don't feel like a different person, but I do feel like a whole one."

Okasa nodded. "So now what?"

"I don't know," Brianna admitted with the shrug apparent in her voice. "I think that's up to Charisma at this point. There's not a whole lot else I can do until she decides what she wants to do with this information." She sighed. "I did tell her if she chose to go forward with our friendship, I would talk to Kent and tell him the truth about me. I won't come between them, Mama. I won't become a home wrecker, especially not hers. And I'm not going to give him a reason to misunderstand what our friendship is - I'm not going to lie and sneak around about it."

"And if he forbids it? If he feels too threatened by you?"

"We'll deal with it when the time comes."

"Fair enough," Okasa agreed. "What about the letters?" she asked after a brief delay.

Brianna shook her head so vehemently, Okasa could hear the motion through the phone. "No. I'm out far enough on this limb without exposing myself completely. *If* the fact that I have loved her for twenty years despite everything doesn't drive her away and *if* when she gets through with her soul searching she and I are still able to remain friends, then perhaps I will share them with her. But until then? No... I don't think so."

"But they're hers!"

"Technically, they're mine. You gave them back to me before she ever saw them. She doesn't even know they exist."

"Well, that's not *entirely* true," Okasa admitted slowly, bracing herself for the blowup she knew was coming when her words computed in Brianna's mind. It only took a second.

"Excuse me?" the words cold and deadly.

Okasa flinched, but soldiered on, knowing she had to prepare Brianna for what was most likely headed her way sooner or later. "She called me last night, ostensibly to check on Adam, but I could tell something had happened. Her voice was rough... like she'd been crying and she seemed.... I'm not sure how to describe it - confused, but resolute. She wouldn't share anything with me - said there was nothing for me to concern myself over."

"Um hmm... so how does that translate into her knowing about the letters, Okasa?"

"I'm getting to that," Okasa replied plaintively, knowing she was in the wrong, but hoping for absolution anyway. "She had mentioned that you two were going to go to that party together, so I naturally asked how it had gone."

"And?"

"I'm getting there." Okasa sighed. "She said that you two had been catching up." She sighed again and fell silent, hoping Brianna would connect the dots and spare her the need to spell it out.

"Okasa, I think I've been pretty patient here, but you're pushing my limits."

"I'm sorry, Brianna... I really am," Okasa rushed ahead. "I thought when Charisma mentioned catching up, she meant from the beginning... from when you left. I assumed that you let her read... I asked what she thought of them. That's all I said."

"Until she asked what 'them' you were talking about."

"Yes. I thought...." Brianna pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger and blew out a deep breath, cutting Okasa off mid-stream. "I'm really sorry, Brianna. I would've never...."

"I know, Okasa. Nothing I can do about it now except deal with the fallout."

"Bri...."

"I've got to go, Okasa. I'll call you later." Without another word, Brianna hung up the phone and turned it off. Then she moved over to the window where she could just make out the lights of several different memorials. It was amazing how quickly a hand basket went to hell once it started down the slippery, steep slope.

At least it would all be over with quickly - despite Charisma's assurances, Brianna didn't expect to come out of this unscathed. It was just a matter of time.

************

When Charisma had first called Brianna - the Monday morning after Brianna's confession - she'd already gone to her office and was up to her eyeballs in paperwork. And since she never turned her cell phone back on, she never realized Charisma had called until much later in the day. When Brianna had returned the call, Charisma had already left DC to return to Okasa's to check on Adam and meet with more of her supporters in several different districts. So Brianna left a message and she and Charisma began a game of phone tag.

Charisma tried to reach Brianna again, only to reach Brianna's answering service, discovering that Brianna had left Washington and was meeting with the Governor, and from there had meetings with constituents in a few of her districts.

And back and forth they went for the better part of a week - trying to reach each other, but only making the most minimal effort possible. It was easy to blame it on work - they were busy. But both knew that what needed to be said between them needed to be said face to face, so it was easy to make their phone calls brief and impersonal and still keep in touch.

As Esmeralda had predicted, both Charisma and Brianna called their office staff back to work briefly, though much of their work was done more informally than was considered normal. Since they still technically had three more weeks of holiday before the new session resumed, it was mostly going through the mail that had accumulated. Still, it took several days to catch up, and so it was more than a week later before they actually found one another sharing personal space again.

It could have been awkward, those first few minutes together again - would have been... had it not been for the fact that they were both too exhausted to make a big deal of things. Instead, they settled in like the old friends they were - at least to begin with.

************

"Rough week?" Charisma asked as they literally ran into one another in the hall outside their offices. They'd bounced off each other and landed on opposite sides against the walls, and her question made Brianna snort. That in turn made Charisma chuckle. Then Brianna laughed, and soon the two of them couldn't stop - every time they thought they had it under control, one would look at the other and it would start all over again.

The sound brought their respective staffs to the doorways of their offices, and they exchanged looks before turning around and heading back to their work. That just made Charisma and Brianna laugh harder. After a few minutes, however, and a bit of effort, they finally managed to bring themselves under some semblance of control, and Brianna took a deep breath.

"I needed that," she wheezed.

Charisma snorted, but managed not to start laughing again. "So did I evidently," she said as she blew out a breath. "Are you all right?"

"Yes, I'm fine. You?"

"I'm good. Sorry about running you over, though. I didn't even see you...."

Brianna narrowed her eyes. "I *know* you weren't about to make a short joke."

"I can't," Charisma deadpanned. "I'm pretty sure you didn't see me either, and I'm not short," sticking out her tongue just slightly. Brianna glared.

"I know where you live and you have to sleep sometime."

Charisma burst into laughter again, only this time it wasn't the out-of-control giggles she'd had before. "You're priceless, Brianna Brianna. Don't you ever go changing on me."

Brianna tilted her head, the conversation suddenly taking an unexpectedly serious turn. "You really mean that?"

Charisma sighed roughly. "I do." She hesitated. "At least I think I do... I mean, I'd like to. But I'd like to know more about you... about who you are and how you got to be the woman you are today. And I'd like to share the same with you - let you know who I am now and what's happened in my life to make me the Charisma Tagherty that is standing in front of you."

"Are you really so different, Charisma? Are you that different from the woman I knew?"

"I think I am, Brianna. A lot has happened in the last twenty years... for better or worse. And for better or worse, it's changed me."

"Maybe in some things, Charisma - I know I've changed... obviously. Otherwise, I wouldn't be here now doing this job in this place. But fundamentally, I am still the same woman you knew in school... just a little less idealistic. And that's not necessarily a bad thing - it's just part of growing up."

"I suppose," Charisma agreed thoughtfully. "I never thought growing up would be what it was."

"I don't think any of us did," Brianna shrugged. "But it is what it is. You do what you can with what you're given and make the best of it. That's just life."

"And if things are taken away instead?"

"You deal with that too."

"I want to read those letters you wrote," Charisma announced abruptly. "I know I probably shouldn't have a right to them after all this time, but the truth is, I would really like to know what they say... especially since they are addressed to me."

"And if I refuse?" Brianna asked wearily. Charisma cocked her head thoughtfully.

"I don't think you will. You wrote them for a reason, Brianna, and you sent them to Mama for safekeeping. Some part of you wants me to read them... maybe even needs me to. I don't know. But I do know you wouldn't have kept them if they weren't important to you... and to me."

"I'd like to talk first," Brianna said frankly. "Privately. I've put myself out there, Charisma. I'd like to know where we stand before...."

"All right," Charisma agreed without hesitation. "Come for dinner...." trailing off when Brianna shook her head.

"No, you come to my place this time. I'll cook."

"Tonight?"

"Six-thirty."

"I'll bring the wine?"

"Bring bottled water. I want to be sober for this."

Charisma nodded. "Okay. I'll see you in a little while, Bri."

Brianna smiled, but didn't answer. She merely disappeared into her office once more.

************

"So things are going to change between us regardless, aren't they?" Charisma asked as Brianna ushered her into the small apartment. Brianna took Charisma's coat and motioned her to the sofa.

"Yes," Brianna confirmed. "It doesn't mean they'll be bad changes though. But we need to be on more even footing than we are right now. I know you're probably still processing... still trying to figure out what all of this means to you and for you and about you. But I've been left kind of hanging - blowing in the breeze as it were. And I know you've been busy and I've been busy and this really isn't something we want to discuss over the phone in between meetings and strategy sessions and office work. But...." Brianna finally looked up and noticed an amused spark in Charisma's eye and she frowned. "What?"

"I haven't seen this side of you in twenty years, Bri. It's... refreshing. It makes me feel young again."

"Charisma, you *are* young," the words muffled as she hung Charisma's coat in the closet.

"Not THAT young," she muttered, but she was smiling. "It's been a long time since we met in that dorm room and you swept Daddy off his feet. Truth be told...." Charisma broke off brusquely.

"Truth be told what, Charisma?" Brianna demanded when the silence continued, only to be met with a shake of Charisma's dark head and eyes that studiously avoided hers. Brianna crossed to the couch and curled her fingers under Charisma's chin, lifting it and nudging gently until blue eyes rose to meet green. "Truth be told what, Charisma?" she asked again, her voice soft and filled with understanding.

"Don't make me," Charisma whispered. "Please don't make me."

"Charisma, I promised to tell you the truth when you asked the right question. I think I deserve the same consideration." Silence. "If you can't be honest with me, can you at least be honest with yourself about this?"

"Please don't make me."

Brianna sighed. Here then was the biggest reason she had left - the reason she'd never shared the truth with Charisma. As difficult as it was for Charisma to acknowledge the fact the Brianna loved her, she would never be able to accept the truth of the reverse... that she was in love with Brianna and had been forever.

Brianna leaned down and brushed a kiss of benediction over Charisma's forehead, not surprised to feel the stiffening and slight flinch under her lips. She felt the tears gather in her eyes, but bit them back, knowing Charisma had no right to her pain anymore. She took a deep breath and looked up at the ceiling.

"It's all right, Charisma - I won't make you. No one will."

Brianna released her grasp on Charisma's chin, and moved to step away from the couch and towards the kitchen. At least dinner preparations would give her... give them both... a chance to compose themselves. She figured Charisma would try to maintain the status quo they had already established, pretending they were still friends. It would take some effort on her part, but Brianna figured she could manage to pretend friendship for another year and a half or so. Then it wouldn't matter. She would be away from Washington and Charisma and it would be simple enough to disappear from the public eye. And she felt confident that like before, Charisma would be content in allowing Brianna to walk out of her life... because it was easier that way.

All this passed through Brianna's mind in the mere seconds it took her to drop her hand from Charisma's face and take her first step away from Charisma. Then a touch on her hand caused Brianna to freeze.

"Don't go," the words a bare whisper.

Brianna kept her eyes on the kitchen. "I have to, Charisma. I can't stay."

"I can't lose you, Bri... not again."

Brianna smiled sadly. "You can't lose what you never had, Charisma... what you never wanted to have," the harsh words tempered only by the pain she felt. "And we'll always be friends, right?" seeing Charisma shrug uncertainly and knowing she felt exactly the same at the moment. "But right now I'm only going to the kitchen. Dinner, remember? I need to get it started if we're going to eat before it gets too late."

"I'm not really hungry," Charisma confessed, swallowing the lump in her throat.

"Would you like to leave then?"

Charisma shook her head. "I thought I had this all figured out. I thought we could be friends again - go back to the way things were before... before you left. When we were best friends and had the world at our feet and our whole lives in front of us. It wouldn't matter that you loved me because friends love each other, right? Especially best friends. And we could work around the fact that loving someone and being in love with them are two different things because it would mean we had our friendship back again. But that's not going to happen, is it?"

Brianna kept her eyes on the far wall, unwilling to let Charisma see the tears and pain in them. She shook her head slowly, the slump of her shoulders conveying her sadness and defeat.

"No, Charisma - it isn't. I've been as honest with you as I know how to be. But if you can't be honest with yourself, you'll never be honest with me. And without honesty between us, we'll never really be friends again - not like we were before. Oh, we might be able to keep in touch... exchange gossip and Christmas cards and recipes now and then. But it will never be like it was." Brianna paused and glanced down at the bowed dark head. "One thing we always had between us was honesty, Charisma, right until the very end. That lack of honesty is what brought us here."

"Your lack of honesty," the words practically spit out in frustration.

"My lack of honesty with you - your lack of honesty with yourself," was the sharp retort.

"And you think that would have mattered??" Charisma asked with venom, jerking her head up to meet Brianna's eyes with angry blue ones. "You think it would have mattered if I had...??" breaking off her words and biting her lip until it bled.

"If you had what, Charisma?" Silence... again. "If you had what??

"I can't," her voice once again so low that Brianna could barely make out the words.

"Can't? Or won't?"

"Everything changes if I say it."

"Everything has already changed, Ri... and it will change again. It's up to you how it happens. Time to decide whether you live by your rules... or everyone else's."



Chapter LXXI

Charisma drew herself up tall though she remained sitting on the couch. "You haven't been in this business very long, Brianna, so I don't expect you to understand. In your business, it's all about truth - your job is to pursue the truth to the best of your ability and ensure that the truth works for you to put the bad guys away and make the world a safer place to live. But here - we're all bad guys, and the truth doesn't matter. It's all about perception - even a lie is okay as long as it's presented in a way that people find acceptable."

"Image is all that matters."

"Essentially, yes."

"And you'd rather live...."

"I accepted that my reality had to conform to society's standard a long time ago, Brianna."

Brianna held Charisma's eyes for a long moment, then blew out a breath while shaking her head in disgust. "I'm glad I don't have to live like that then." She picked up her cell phone and hit her speed dial, gratified when Jas picked it up on the first ring.

"Yes, Senator?"

"Jas, can you please come pick up Senator Tagherty from my apartment and take her home?" Brianna felt Charisma's head snap in her direction, but she refused to acknowledge her. Instead, she kept her attention on her phone conversation.

"Absolutely, Senator. I can be there in five minutes."

"Thanks, Jas. Senator Tagherty will be downstairs waiting. And she'll have a good-sized box with her as well - you'll need to put it in the trunk and help her get it inside when you arrive at her home."

"Understood, Senator."

"Thank you, Jas. I owe you."

"It's my pleasure, Senator." Brianna thumbed off the phone and crossed over to the closet, removing Charisma's coat and turning to find Charisma still sitting on the couch, unmoving. She placed Charisma's coat over the back of the sofa and picked up the analog phone, dialing a single digit. It was answered immediately.

"Sergeant Orwin? Could you send someone up to my apartment, please? Senator Tagherty is leaving and she's got some stuff to take with her."

"Yes ma'am, Senator. Someone will be right there."

"Thank you, Sergeant." When Brianna hung up the phone, she turned to find Charisma glaring at her.

"You're throwing me out??"

"You could look at it that way I suppose. You stated that you weren't hungry, and I'm now completely clear on where I stand with you. As I see it, that means our business is finished. So you're free to take the letters and be on your way with them. Because you were right, of course - I wrote them to you for a reason, and I sent them to Mama for safekeeping. Some part of me obviously does want you to read them... otherwise I would have destroyed them myself when Okasa returned them to me."

A knock on the door halted their conversation, and Brianna walked over to answer it. "Senator Walker? It's Corporal North. Sergeant Orwin sent me - said Senator Tagherty needed help getting some things downstairs." Brianna checked the peephole, then waited for the young woman to hold up her ID badge. Satisfied, Brianna nodded and opened the door, then motioned to the box she'd tucked under the table behind the couch.

"Thank you, Corporal," Brianna offered as the woman hefted the box.

"Of course, Senator. Anything else?"

"No... that's it. Senator Tagherty will be right down."

"Yes ma'am," waiting for Brianna to open the door, then leaving without looking back. Brianna shut the door and turned back to Charisma who was slowly belting her coat.

"So that's it then?" Charisma asked as she moved to stand beside Brianna at the door. Brianna forced herself not to stiffen as Charisma approached, but Charisma picked up on Brianna's trepidation and lingered just out of touching distance.

"That's it. They're yours now, Charisma - you can do what you want with them. Read them, put them away somewhere safe... hell, make a bonfire out of them for all I care. It doesn't matter to me."

"I... thank you, Brianna. You do understand there's nothing personal about this, right?"

Brianna snorted. "Of course there's nothing personal. There never has been," ignoring Charisma's sharp inhalation.

"So, I'll see you at Mama's for Christmas Eve, right?" trying to get the conversation back to something that they would both be comfortable talking about. She was glad there was still over a week before the holiday rolled around. Maybe she and Brianna would be back on a more even keel by then.

"No, Charisma. You won't see me at Mama's for Christmas Eve. I'll call and make my regrets."

Charisma searched the green gaze, but there was nothing to read in Brianna's eyes. "If you really feel that way," she started to say slowly, only to find herself cut off by Brianna's determined voice.

"I do. I'll make sure Mama understands that it is solely my decision."

"You're running away again??"

"No. This time I'm saying goodbye." Brianna opened the door and Charisma crossed the threshold, feeling a finality about things when Brianna softly shut the door between them. Charisma drew a deep breath and headed towards the elevator, refusing to look back.

************

"So that's it then? We're done?" Saphira asked when Indi stopped speaking. As soon as Charisma had climbed into the limousine, Indi had taken off to let Esmeralda and the rest know what had happened during the confrontation in Brianna's apartment. Even without knowing what had caused Indigo to ask, Jas had given her the go-ahead with a nod, agreeing to keep an eye on Charisma until Indi could get back to watch over her until time for Amber's shift.

Esmeralda motioned her thanks and indicated for Indi to head back before she turned to Saphira. "Not yet," smiling sympathetically when Saphira slumped marginally. "He will decide when it's over and we'll be called home then... or at least the rest will. Ruby will have to make a report and everyone else will corroborate her story by filling in their bits."

"And what about your part, Es? You're still in charge of this.... I'm not sure what to call what this has become."

"All in a day's work, Phira," Esmeralda replied. "As for my part, He'll let me know when He's ready for my report on the mission."

"That's messed up."

"A little maybe - but that's the way things work... or not, in this case."

"So how long does it take to get the call?" Esmeralda frowned, not understanding Saphira's question. "Once He is satisfied with the results... or once the results are deemed final," waiting for Esmeralda to nod her comprehension, "how quickly does the call come?"

"It's almost immediate... at least for the team leader. The others follow pretty quickly though."

"So we're not done yet."

"Evidently not. I'd like to be a fly on the wall when Brianna calls Okasa though. I think Okasa is going to see the District Attorney side of Brianna Walker, and there isn't gonna be room for a plea bargain."

"Do you think Charisma will read those letters tonight?"

"No," said firmly and without hesitation. "I think she'll wait, accepting the time as some sort of penance for having them in the first place. I wouldn't be surprised if somehow in her rationalization about all this, Charisma sees not reading the letters as a form of punishment for Brianna as well."

"That's warped."

"Yeah, but everything else is at this point, so why not her thinking as well? Remember what she told Brianna - it's all about image and perception. She believes that Brianna needs her to read these letters, so if she delays reading them, then she does penance and Brianna is punished."

"For what?"

"Excuse me?"

"For what? Why does Brianna need to be punished?"

"I dunno - you asked if I thought Charisma would read the letters immediately. I was just thinking aloud from there. Given how things have gone so far...."

"My head hurts now."

"Honestly... so does mine. But my heart hurts too. These two seem determined to be miserable apart. Granted, it's more Charisma than Brianna at this point. Denial's not just a river, ya know. Brianna's mostly given up, I think." Esmeralda shook her head. "It's still a lot of speculation on my part of course. Opal and Indi will be able to give us more facts when they get home."

"Meantime, let's go fix a little dinner. I'm not sure Ruby will eat at the diner like we do."

Esmeralda nodded. "And you can tell me how you got the night off while Ruby is working."

************

"Okasa, this is Brianna."

Okasa frowned. There was something in Brianna's voice... something she hadn't heard since that day long ago when Brianna had come to say goodbye. She shivered in reaction, feeling the tendrils of anxiety begin to curl in her belly. Still, she forced a note of cheerfulness into her voice, hoping beyond hope that her premonition about what was coming was completely off base.

"Hello, Little Bri. How are you this evening?"

"I've been better, Okasa," diligently taking pains *not* to refer to Okasa more familiarly. What she was doing was going to break the older woman's heart and she had no desire to twist the knife any more than was necessary to break the ties that bound them together.

"Is everything all right, Brianna?" her tone of concern genuine and caring. Brianna swallowed hard and steeled herself for what was coming.

"It will be. Listen, Okasa," rushing ahead before she changed her mind, "I wanted to let you know that I won't be there for Christmas."

Okasa sucked in a breath. Despite its awkward moments, Thanksgiving had been such a wonderful holiday for Okasa - having the whole family together again after being fractured for so long had soothed her heart. And she'd thought everyone felt the same. Obviously, she had missed something.

"So we should plan to see you...?"

"You shouldn't. Don't make separate arrangements for me - I won't be celebrating with your family anymore."

"Brianna?"

"I'm sorry, Okasa. I should have stuck to my guns and done this twenty years ago - then we wouldn't be in this mess and this wouldn't...." She trailed off without finishing the thought, then took a deep breath and steeled her fortitude once more. "Anyway, just... give the boys a kiss for me and tell them I love them, will you? I'm glad you were all a part of my life - I really do love all of you."

"Then why are you doing this, Brianna?"

"Because it needs to be done."

"But...."

"Goodbye, Okasa," Brianna said, then clicked off the phone and tossed it to the table. She knew it would ring again in a few minutes, but she didn't particularly care. She didn't have to answer it. Besides, she had other things to take care of, and the first thing involved going downstairs to talk to Sergeant Orwin. Then she'd call Indi and go from there.

************

"And you're sure you want her removed from your list, Senator Walker?"

"I'm sure, Sergeant. Is it going to be a problem?"

"No ma'am. A little unusual, but not a problem. Is Mrs. Tagherty the only visitor you need removed?"

Brianna bit her lip thoughtfully. "Actually, I need all the Taghertys taken off my list. It will make things easier."

Sergeant Orwin cocked his head, wondering what had happened in the hour that Senator Tagherty had been upstairs that Senator Walker was ensuring that Charisma no longer had access to her in her residence. However, it wasn't his job to be a busybody - it was his job to make the tenants of this building comfortable and secure. And if Senator Walker wanted their entrance blocked, then he would make sure it happened for her. He thought it a shame, though - Senator Tagherty had always been nice to him, and she seemed to be one of the few friends Senator Walker had here. Then again, it wasn't his business, so he simply nodded his head.

"It'll be taken care of, Senator. Is there anything else I can do?"

"Not tonight, Sergeant. Thank you for your help."

"I'm glad to do it Senator Walker. Have a nice night."

"You too, Sergeant," Brianna offered as she entered the elevator and headed back to her apartment. She had a couple more calls to make.

************

When Indi showed up the second time out of the blue, Esmeralda and Saphira just waited for her to explain. As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Esmeralda and Saphira exchanged glances, then Saphira nodded and disappeared. Indi sighed and dialed Brianna's number on her cell phone, then put it on speaker so Esmeralda could hear the conversation as well. It was answered on the first ring.

"Senator Walker? This is Indi. I'm sorry I missed your call, but...."

"It's all right, Indi. You *are* supposed to be on holiday. I just need your help for a few minutes, and then you can go back to whatever it was that I interrupted."

"What can I do for you, Senator?"

"I've decided I'd like to go out of town for the holidays." Indi and Esmeralda looked at one another with wide eyes, and Esmeralda gestured towards the phone with her head before the silence drew out too long.

"Yes ma'am," she replied. "And you need me to make the arrangements for you?"

"If you could, please. I'm not sure I remember the last time I did something like that. I'm not even sure where to start to tell you the truth."

"It's all right, Senator. That's what I'm here for," booting up her computer. "Where would you like to go?"

Brianna snorted, brought up short by Indi's question. "You know something? I'm not really sure. I'm being spontaneous, so I haven't actually gotten that far in my thinking."

"Okay - how about I ask you some questions and we'll figure it out together." Brianna agreed, and a few minutes later, the arrangements were made. Brianna thanked Indi for her help and the call ended. Then Indi sank back into the chair she was sitting in and sighed.

"I'm sorry, Es - I didn't know what else to do."

"You did the right thing, Indi. At least we'll know where she is. And Opal and Coral should be able to go back and forth to cover her until she returns."

"Es, do you think that's necessary?"

Esmeralda sighed. "I don't think we can afford to think otherwise. We can't let our guard down now."

"You think we're close to the end?"

Esmeralda snorted. "I've thought that several times already and every time I've been wrong," garnering a sympathetic smile from Indi. "However, I refuse to be lax at this stage. I won't fail them as long as I have the opportunity to make a difference for them."

"This one hit close to home, huh?"

"Yeah - I just wish...."

"Es, you've done all you can."

"I know. It doesn't make me wish any less." She sighed. "How was Charisma?"

"Broody. She kept glaring at that box of letters like it had stolen her favorite dolly and was dismembering it in front of her."

Esmeralda's eyebrows shot into her hairline. "That's quite a visual."

"Yeah, well... so was the look on her face."

Esmeralda snorted. "So I take it she hadn't opened the box yet?"

"She hasn't actually touched it. Jas brought it in the house for her and put it on the coffee table in her study. That's where it was when I left - still unopened. And Charisma was sitting at her desk... just glaring at it."

"So I was at least partially correct."

"Es?"

Esmeralda shook her head. "Later. C'mon. Amber and Coral will be leaving in just a few and when Opal and Saphira and Ruby get here we can see where we're at."

"We're behind the eight ball, Es," Amber offered with a smile as she walked by the living room. "Just like always." Esmeralda just smirked and shook her head, waving goodbye to Amber and Coral before they disappeared from sight.



Chapter LXXII

Charisma had glared at the box for a while longer before she headed up to her bedroom. She deliberately ignored the photo album that once again rested on her bedside table, and went straight into the bathroom to run a hot bath. When it was full and fragrant, she stepped into the water with a sigh, closing her eyes and letting the sounds of Mozart lull her into a place of serenity.

But eventually the water cooled and Charisma bathed quickly and wrapped herself in a bath sheet when her feet were firmly on the mat. Then she looked up and caught sight of herself in the mirror, and she walked closer to get a better look.

She dropped the towel and eyed herself critically, noting with a bit of pride that she was still in good shape for a middle-aged woman, especially after having given birth. Not a lot of sagging and still pretty firm where it counted. Then again, Charisma acknowledged to herself wryly, she'd paid good money to that trainer and spent hours upon hours regaining her figure after Adam had been born.

A chill chased over her skin and she watched the goosebumps rise in its path. She reached down for the towel, rewrapping herself then leaning forward to look at her face. There were slight lines around her eyes and mouth that could be attributed to laughter or, in the case of the ones near her lips, considered dimples if one didn't look too closely.

Her lips were full, her eyes wide, her nose straight. There were no gray hairs - regular trips to her hairdresser ensured that her highlights remained natural looking and her grays remained hidden. She tilted her head and stared harder at herself, straining to see whatever it was that had caused Brianna to fall in love with her. Charisma wondered if after the discussion they'd had if Brianna still saw it, and if she would ever share with Charisma what it was.

Charisma sighed - she'd come up here to get away from Brianna and all thoughts of Brianna, and yet they followed her like a spectre. The box of letters sat unopened on the coffee table in her study and even from this distance she could hear them mocking her.

She scrubbed her hands over her eyes, hoping to clear her mind. She grabbed her robe from the back of the door and pushed her arms into it, belting it closed before stepping foot into her bedroom. Charisma growled when she spotted the album on the nightstand, and hastened back out of the bedroom and down the stairs. She was headed to the bar in her study, but abruptly walked into the kitchen instead. She'd told Brianna the truth... just not the whole truth. It was all about image and perception, but behind that was control. And Charisma wasn't going to relinquish her control to anyone - certainly not to alcohol.

She took the milk from the refrigerator and pulled out the smallest saucepan she could find. Then she warmed some milk and added a taste of vanilla and a hint of sugar. When it was ready, she took the mug upstairs and settled into bed.

Charisma deliberately reached over the album, sneering at it before grabbing for the latest thriller that she'd purchased on the recent trip she'd made to Mama's. She didn't get to read for pleasure very often, so she generally stuck with tried and true. This book, however - there was something about the cover that caught her eyes, and the description on the back had clinched it. And for the first time in a very long time, Charisma had been pleasantly surprised by something new.

Now she found her place and relaxed into the pillows as she sipped her milk and immersed herself in the imagination of H.A. Fontana.

It wasn't until sometime later - when her milk was finished and she was snuggled down ready to turn off the light - that Charisma realized she hadn't heard from Okasa. She knew if Brianna had made good her threat to call Okasa and cancel her holiday plans with the family, Okasa would have called her immediately to do something to rectify the situation. Charisma idly wondered if perhaps Brianna had reconsidered giving up Christmas with the family - after all, Thanksgiving had been wonderful. Surely Brianna wasn't willing to miss personal family time with the boys... and everyone else... because of business.

Satisfied that Brianna had come to her senses and would be at Mama's when Christmas Eve rolled around, Charisma clicked off the light and slowly slipped into sleep.

************

It was the smell of coffee that brought Charisma out of a dead sleep. She frowned and blinked her eyes open slowly, trying to remember if she'd set the coffeemaker the night before. A glance at the clock made her sit up sharply, knowing there was no way in the blue blazes of hell itself that she'd set *anything* for five o'clock in the morning. Even when Congress was in session she didn't get up this early. She certainly didn't when they were in recess... especially when Adam wasn't home.

Charisma got up soundlessly and crept to the closet, opening the safe and pulling out the handgun she kept locked inside. Though she seriously doubted an assailant would stop to make coffee, the fact remained that *someone* was in her house who hadn't been there the night before when she'd gone to bed. So she eased down the stairs silently, glad for the time she'd spent training on the range... and the black belt she could fall back on if necessary.

Charisma took a deep breath and raised the gun. Then she eased around the kitchen doorframe and nearly dropped the gun on the floor in surprise when she realized who her unexpected visitor was.

"Mama?! What are you doing sneaking into my house at five o'clock in the morning?" She latched the safety and put the gun on the counter out of sight before moving closer to Okasa's side.

Okasa gave Charisma a sardonic look. "I snuck into your house at midnight... only because you were already in bed asleep I might add. I am making coffee at five a.m. because I couldn't sleep."

Charisma frowned. "Is everything okay?" She held up a hand before Okasa could make a smart retort. "Obviously everything *isn't* okay if you're here and sneaking into my house at some ungodly hour of the night without calling first. Is it Adam?" her voice becoming more frantic. "Mama, what's wrong?? Where's my son??"

"It's not Adam," Okasa reassured Charisma immediately, smiling as she watched the tension flow out of Charisma's body "He's at home with Paddy and Ame where he's supposed to be. But something is definitely wrong. Has anything happened between you and Brianna recently?"

"How do you mean?" Charisma hedged, moving to the cabinet and reaching for a cup so she could keep her back to Okasa. Okasa grabbed her by the shoulder and forced Charisma to turn around and face her.

"Don't play games with me, Charisma Tagherty. You may be a big shot in Washington, D.C., but you're still my daughter and I won't tolerate disrespect from you."

"Mama, I wouldn't...."

"You just did. I'm not stupid. Please don't act like I am. Now," taking a deep breath and continuing only a little less severely, "what happened between you and Brianna?"

"May I ask why you're asking first?"

Okasa sighed. "She called me earlier this evening... or rather, last evening. Told me she couldn't make it for Christmas, and basically stated that we weren't going to be a family... her family... anymore." Okasa felt more than saw Charisma's swift intake of breath, but she ignored it and resumed speaking. "I know things were good at Thanksgiving - I know you two worked some things out. So what happened? What made Brianna call and remove herself from our family, Charisma?"

"Why are you asking me? Why do you assume it's my fault?"

The look Okasa shot Charisma was telling. "Now you're being deliberately stupid, Charisma, and it doesn't suit you."

"Excuse me?" the anger making her face flush a deep, dark red. Okasa held blue eyes without flinching.

"No excuse. But don't worry...." She pointed a finger at Charisma. "I'm not going to burst that bubble you're living in just yet. First I want to know what happened between you and Brianna that got me locked out of the Senate apartment building."

"Excuse me?" Charisma repeated. "What?"

Okasa blew out an impatient breath and picked up her mug. "C'mon... this is going to take a while obviously and I am too tired and too sore to stand around the kitchen at this time of the morning." They went into the family room and Charisma realized immediately that Okasa had tried sleeping on the couch. While comfortable enough for short naps, it wasn't made for long term sleeping and she turned to her mother in consternation.

"You were trying to sleep down here?? Why didn't you go upstairs to one of the guest rooms?"

"You came downstairs with a gun this morning when you smelled coffee brewing," Okasa replied wryly. "Do you really think I would chance sneaking around up there last night when the only thing that would have been announcing my presence was sound?? I like living, Charisma - I still have a number of things left to do on my bucket list before I die. I'd rather not get shot by my daughter because I was creeping around unexpectedly in her home at midnight."

"Well when you put it that way...." Charisma said drolly. Okasa gave her a tight smile. "Mama, why didn't you just call me?"

"Have a seat," motioning Charisma to one of the recliners while she reseated herself on the couch. "I'll start at the beginning of my part of this saga. Then maybe you'll fill in the beginning of yours."

************

"So by the time I was finished talking to the young man on duty and he roused his sergeant to explain to me what Brianna had done and why he couldn't countermand her directive and so forth and so on, it was close to midnight. I did call your cell phone, but when I got no answer I figured you were out at some party or other. It was only once I got here and saw that the house was dark that I realized you were probably in bed asleep. So I let myself in."

"She really had you banned from the building?"

"Not from the building per se - simply from her visitor's list. I couldn't even get the young man to call and find out if there had been a mistake. When the sergeant came in, he assured me that Brianna had spoken to him personally shortly after you'd left. And a short time after that, she'd left for the remainder of the holiday for parts unknown."

"I thought she understood," Charisma muttered.

"Understood what?"

"It doesn't matter - evidently I was incorrect in my supposition."

Okasa glared. "Charisma, what did you and Brianna argue about?"

"We didn't argue, Mama," keeping her gaze steady when Okasa snorted her disbelief. "We didn't," Charisma insisted. "We talked about a number of different things, including the nature of the business that is politics in this town, but we didn't argue. She gave me the letters you told me about and then I left."

"And have you read them? The letters, Charisma - have you read them?"

"Mama, I just brought the box home last night. I haven't had time...."

"Have you even opened the box yet, Charisma?"

Charisma huffed. "No, Mama... I haven't. I do have other things in my life that take precedence over some old letters that were written twenty years ago," her expression defiant. Okasa glared at Charisma with more than a hint of disgust and aggravation on her countenance and Charisma shrugged her shoulders diffidently. "What??"

"You're a coward, Charisma Tagherty, and we raised you better than that. However," she went on, ignoring Charisma's sputtered attempts at outrage, "except as it concerns Brianna's withdrawal from our family, it's not really my business, is it?" Okasa paused. "That's what you were going to say, wasn't it? " A beat. "Charisma, if the letters weren't that important to you, why did you push to get them?"

"Who says I did?"

"Charisma, I *know* what Brianna's reaction was when she found out you knew about the letters. I'm the one who had to tell her you knew!"

"That doesn't mean I demanded she give them to me!"

"She wouldn't have given them to you if you hadn't asked her for them. They were hers to give... or not... and I know for a fact she had no intention of sharing them with you right now - she TOLD me so. But then she's never really been able to deny you very much, Daughter."

"I don't see what the big deal is - they're just some old letters that are addressed to me. Wouldn't you be the least bit curious if it was you, Mama?"

"Yes, probably," Okasa admitted without hesitation. "But then I never treated anyone in my life the way you have Brianna."

"She's the one who walked away, Mama!"

"And you're the one who let her go." Okasa snorted, her mien tainted with more than a hint of sadness. "You'd like to think no one can see past the façade you've built around yourself. But the truth of the matter is - you're the only one who can't... or won't... see past it." She sighed soundlessly and rose from the couch. "Go read your letters, Charisma - or don't. It's up to you. I'm going to go take a shower and then I'm going home."

"But...."

"You said you had things to do. So do I, and believe it or not, they don't involve staying here. The only reason I came down here in the first place is because Brianna refused to answer the phone after she said goodbye."

"Wait - she said goodbye to you?"

"Yes. And this time, I think she intends for it to stick."

"How dare she...!! After all this family has done for her!! I'll...."

"You'll what, Charisma??" Okasa asked kindly. "She's done as much for this family as any other member of it without any real obligation except the one in her heart. And no expectation of it lasting beyond the moment, though I blame her parents for that outlook as much as I blame...."

"As much as you blame me?" Charisma asked bitterly, shocking Okasa with her tone.

"I was going to say as much as I blame anything else in her life, Charisma. Why would you think I'd blame you for that?"

"You seem to be blaming me for everything else," her attitude almost petulant. "Why not this?" Charisma sighed and closed her eyes, willing herself to find the calm center she'd developed for dealing with crises many years prior. When she felt it slip into place, she opened her eyes and looked at Okasa. "I'm sorry, Mama. That was uncalled for."

Okasa wanted to cry. She felt like she'd been making headway, even if it had been inch by battering, bloody inch. And now Charisma's walls were back in place. She nodded and turned her back to Charisma so she could start stripping the couch of the bedding she had used. "No harm, no foul, right?"

Charisma chuckled, though it sounded strained and awkward. "You've been hanging around with the boys too much, Mama, if you're using sports idioms."

"They're the ones I see for dinner every week, Charisma. And there is always sports talk after dinner if not during." She finished folding the blanket and placed it on one end of the couch. "Even the girls get involved in a lot of it."

"That must make for some interesting meals."

"It makes for some interesting dialogue at any rate." Her smile held a hint of embarrassment. "I've already had to put a couple topics off-limits. They came perilously close to starting food fights."

"I'm sorry I missed that," Charisma offered quietly.

Okasa nodded, offering absolution. "We understand, Charisma. We always have. It's why we welcomed Brianna into our home and into our family all those years ago. And why we'll let her walk away from us now."

"Mama?"

"You needed us to make her part of the family. She needs us to let her go."

"I don't want to," Charisma whispered, her distress evident.

Okasa smiled sadly. "Neither do I... none of us do. But it's probably for the best." She turned and faced Charisma, then lifted a hand and cupped Charisma's cheek and tenderly wiped away the tear that spilled from blue eyes.

"How can you say that, Mama?"

"Call it mother's intuition, Charisma. Brianna's lived with this knowledge for a very long time. Maybe with some space from all of us, she'll be able to find some peace for herself."

"So I get a couple weeks to assimilate this whole thought-altering concept that by your own admission she's had years to deal with and she gets to go off to find peace?? How's that's supposed to be fair?!?" Charisma's outrage was overriding her anguish at the way her life was falling apart around her. Okasa shook her head and pulled Charisma's face towards her until she could brush a kiss over her forehead. Charisma squeezed her eyes shut tighter, recalling Brianna performing the same act of forgiveness the night before.

"Oh, Sweetheart - I never said anything about it being fair. Life generally isn't. Besides, it wasn't really that thought-altering for you, was it?? The only alteration to your thinking is that now you have confirmation of what you've always known in your heart. It's just at the forefront of your mind instead of something you can dismiss as your imagination... or wishful thinking."

Charisma's jaw dropped, but she was unable to formulate a response before Okasa kissed her again, then turned and left the room. The shower was running in the guest bath before she pulled herself together and started picking up the things in the family room. By the time Okasa returned, dressed and ready to leave, Charisma had pulled herself together and rejected Okasa's words as frivolous.

"Are you sure you need to rush off, Mama? I could take some time...."

"I'm sure. I know you have things to take care of. I expect you home in a few days," waiting for Charisma to nod. "And you think about what I said," deflating slightly when she saw Charisma had already dismissed her statements as inconsequential.

"Drive home safely, Mama," Charisma offered, giving Okasa a hug and walking her to the door.

"Goodbye, Daughter. See you soon. I love you."

"I know, Mama. I love you too." She waited for Okasa to get into her car and roll towards the gate. Then she shut the door and headed upstairs to get ready for her day, painstakingly avoiding even a glance at the study. She would deal with that later.



Chapter LXXIII

Brianna stretched out on the bed with a sigh of contentment. Notwithstanding the fact that she knew she was running away again, the only feeling she could dredge up about it this time was one of peace. She was tired and she felt as though she'd been buffeted by hurricane force winds for the last few months. At least before, tempestuous hadn't meant she got beaten black and blue on a daily basis. And that's how she felt - in the very depths of her soul. She felt like she'd been beaten with a stick every day since accepting the appointment as interim Senator. She'd expected it to be hard - she hadn't expected it to be deadly.

And despite how melodramatic that sounded, it was how she felt - like she was dying inch by slow inch. Brianna took a deep breath. She hadn't even realized she was suffocating... drowning... until she left... until she arrived in Dubai and felt everything slip from her shoulders. She'd have to remember to do something really nice for Indi - this had been a spectacular choice.

Brianna turned to look at her view and smiled when a school of fish swam past her room. Who knew you could have an underwater panorama if you chose the right resort to visit? She clicked on the flat-screen and perused the choices of activities at the resort. And for the first time in months, felt her creative juices stirring. She might be able to get a novel or two out of this adventure.

But first she needed to call Esmeralda. She had promised to keep in touch, and being half a world away wasn't going to change that.

************

"Brianna - you didn't have to call me from Dubai," Esmeralda said with a tiny laugh. "I can certainly understand wanting to get away from the snow and the cold for a while. I definitely would too, given the opportunity… even without the extenuating circumstances."

"You don't think I'm a coward, Es?"

"Brianna - what I think shouldn't matter. Do you think you're a coward?"

Brianna sighed. "I think I'm tired, Es. I've tried everything I know to try."

"Then take a break, Brianna. Maybe you'll come back with a fresh outlook."

"Maybe I'll finally be able to put it to rest once and for all."

"Maybe," Esmeralda said as noncommittally as she could manage. "I guess this means we won't be seeing you around Christmas though, huh?"

"Not this year, Es. But is there anything I can bring you back from here?"

"Just yourself home safely, Brianna. I'll miss having you around to talk to while you're gone."

Brianna chuckled. "I'll still call you every few days, Es. The phones work here just like they do in Washington. And you have my number if anything comes up, right?"

"I do."

"All right. I'll talk to you in a couple days then, okay?"

"Have a good time, Brianna. Take some pictures and relax."

"I will - talk to you soon."

"Be happy, Brianna."

"Bye, Es."

************

"Es, this is Charisma."

"Hey Charisma! How are you enjoying the break?" having a fairly good idea after hearing about things from Indi and Coral especially, but wondering what Charisma would offer as her truth.

"Staying busy - for some reason the holidays don't mean less work... just different," smiling when she got a chuckle from Esmeralda. "How about you, Es? Are you getting some rest?"

"I'm becoming a spoiled lady of leisure," Esmeralda responded lightly. "I haven't felt this good since... I'm not sure I've ever felt this good actually. I feel almost made over."

"That's wonderful, Es... just amazing. I guess Saphira is thrilled with the turnaround?"

Esmeralda laughed. "I'm pretty sure that's an understatement, Charisma. I haven't seen her this relaxed in a long time - like she's carrying a much lighter burden."

"She is, Es, and Mama will be happy to hear it for both of your sakes. She asks about you every time we talk." Charisma wavered a moment, then pushed on. "Will you be joining us for Christmas?" She almost felt Esmeralda's eyes widen in shock. "You're family now, you know."

"Oh Charisma - that's... it's wonderful of you to say so, but I don't think we can. Even if we had a way to get there, I don't see how we could go this year. Saphira is picking up as many extra shifts as Matilda will let her have, and I wouldn't leave her here by herself even if it was an option for me. But I appreciate the thought... we both do. Make sure to give the family our love, won't you?"

"You know I will," Charisma assured her with a smile that could be heard over the phone. "I expected that answer, but I promised Mama I'd ask. Don't be surprised if I come by the day after with a truckload of stuff for you both though. You know how Mama is."

"I do indeed. You're very lucky."

"Mama reminds me of that all the time," Charisma snorted. Esmeralda laughed again. "Listen Es," Charisma said before the silence could become uncomfortable. "Do you by any chance... have you been in touch with Brianna lately?"

Esmeralda sighed. She'd wondered if she would get out of this unscathed, then shook her head. She should have known better. "Um... yeah - she called me yesterday. Said she'd had enough of the cold and snow and was gonna spend a little time in the sun before Congress resumed in January."

"You didn't happen to ask where she was did you?"

"No... it didn't occur to me to ask," not mentioning she hadn't needed to since Brianna had freely shared the information with her. "Why? Is something wrong, Charisma?"

"What? No - she asked me for a copy of something," looking at the picture of the two of them at Trevi Fountain. It made Charisma want to cry, but she took a deep breath to fortify her nerves - she'd promised Brianna a copy and she was damn well going to deliver despite everything. "But I haven't been able to reach her so we could plan a time for me to get it to her. I tried calling her, but...." A pause. "Do you know if she called you from her cell phone?"

"I don't know, Charisma. I didn't ask. I assumed she did." When silence met her answer, Esmeralda pushed a little, having a very good idea what Charisma was talking about. "Charisma, is it something you could send to her by email?"

"Not really... I mean, I guess I could if I had to. But at the moment it's just a hard copy item."

"Is it something you could scan in or is it like a book?"

Charisma sucked in another deep breath then covered her mouth, pressing hard against her lip to keep the tears at bay. She cleared her throat. "No... it's something I could scan in. It's a picture we had taken together - when we were in Rome years ago."

"Well, if it's important enough that it can't wait for her to return from her trip, maybe you could scan a copy in and send it to her by email. You can always give her a hard copy once she returns," knowing that it was more than important... to both of them.

Charisma slowly released the breath she'd been holding and nodded her head even though Esmeralda couldn't see her reaction. "I suppose I could do that. I may have to make a few phone calls first, though," she added as an aside.

"Charisma?" Esmeralda's voice rising almost as much as her eyebrows.

Charisma gave her a deprecating chuckle. "Es, I turn the computer on and I turn the computer off. For everything else, I have interns and personal assistants." She shook her head. "Sometimes I have interns and personal assistants for that too actually, come to think of it," she added drolly.

Esmeralda laughed. "Well, Charisma - I know your staff is supposed to be on vacation. So if you can't figure it out and you can't get ahold of someone, you let me know. I'll come by and give you a hand."

"You'd do that? Es, that's so sweet. I'll tell you what - is Saphira working tomorrow?"

"Yes, of course."

"How about if I pick you both up about nine-thirty? You can come over and share brunch with me, and if I haven't figured out how to scan this thing in by then, you can help me figure it out... or show me how to do it. Whatever works. We can drop Saphira off at the diner on our way back to your house."

"Are you sure?"

Charisma frowned. "What do you mean am I sure?? Of course I'm sure. So it's a date?"

"You bet, Charisma... it's a date."

************

"The house seems so quiet without Adam," Saphira commented when they were ensconced in Charisma's study after brunch the following day. Esmeralda glared at her and Saphira shrugged. "What?? It's the truth. I miss my little buddy."

Charisma laughed. "It is. And I'm sure he misses you too - my mother still hasn't cured him of streaking through the house naked yet."

"Tell her to turn the heat off," Esmeralda instructed seriously. "After about the third time, that one was cured," gesturing to Saphira who gave an incredulous looking Charisma her best sheepish grin.

"What??" she asked again. "We were all born naked - it's a perfectly natural state."

"So is snow and ice - it doesn't mean I want it parading through the house in the middle of winter. Especially when we've got people living with us... even if they are family."

Charisma blinked and shook her head. "You two continue to confound me, honestly," meeting the twin looks of disbelief that gazed back at her. "What? I'm not kidding. You're both so different from anyone I've ever met. I'm sure I've never known a couple like the two of you."

"Not even in your family?"

Charisma shook her head. "Not even - it's not that they're not all happily married and don't love each other, but you two seem like such a part of one another. It's just... it's hard to describe. But it's very different from anything I've ever known."

Saphira's eyebrows went into her hairline. "Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"

"A little of both, I think. It's a good thing for me because I know you and have gotten to experience something... amazing. It's a bad thing that I don't really know more like you. The world could use more people like you two in it."

"Yeah," Esmeralda agreed as she met Saphira's eyes, love and mischief twinkling out of hers in equal proportions. "A little bit crazy always helps."

"Especially if the crazy fits perfectly with someone else's," Saphira added with a laugh. Charisma laughed with them and shook her head.

"We're going to miss you at Mama's table in a couple days. Are you sure you can't come? I could stay and give you a ride up and back."

Saphira shook her head. "No, Charisma. I don't get off until four on Christmas Eve and I have to be back for a lunch shift the day after Christmas. Thank you though - we appreciate the thought more than you'll ever know."

"If you're sure...."

"We are. So when are you leaving?"

"Well, since I wasn't able to talk you into changing your minds, I guess I'll leave this afternoon."

"I guess we better see if we can make this thing work, then," Esmeralda said. She motioned to the laptop sitting on the desk. "Do you mind or...?"

"Please. It's password protected, so let me know when you're ready for me to do my part." Saphira moved around Esmeralda, hooking up the to the computer and in a few moments they had Charisma set up and ready to go. She just looked at them. "Wait... that's it?"

"That's it. All we need now is the picture, and we'll scan it in. Then you can attach it to an email and send it on its merry way."

"Well, well - I've learned something new today. I guess you really can teach an old bitch new tricks." Charisma snorted at the shocked expressions on her companions' faces. "Please... like I don't know what they say about me in the halls and offices. You can't be a woman in my business and not be a bitch as far as your colleagues and most of the rest of the world are concerned... not if you're going to get somewhere. Now, show me where the picture is."

"We need to scan it in first," Esmeralda reminded her with a gentle smile that held the tiniest hint of teasing. "You haven't actually given it to us yet."

Charisma just shook her head and crossed to the coffee table where the album was resting once more. "One day," she said, looking at them pointedly as she thumbed through the album to retrieve the picture she needed. "One day, you're going to get old... just like me. And while I know I'm politely considered middle-aged by most of society, the fact is that I am getting old. The mind isn't what it once was and neither is the body."

"I don't know, Charisma - I don't think you have much to worry about on either score," Esmeralda offered honestly. "A lot of women pay good money to look as fabulous as you do."

Charisma smirked. "And what makes you think I don't?"

"I've seen your Mama."

Charisma's jaw snapped closed so quickly she almost bit her tongue. She cut her eyes at Esmeralda who returned the look with an innocent expression. Charisma turned her attention to Saphira who was struggling not to laugh.

"You better keep your eye on her, Saphira. She's sneaky."

"And very good at it," Saphira added without missing a beat. She accepted the photograph Charisma handed over. She put it on the scanner, then nodded to Esmeralda, and in another moment, the job was complete.

"There you go, Charisma - all done."

Thank you... both of you. I appreciate the help."

"We were happy to do it. It's a beautiful picture - looks like a precious memory."

"It was," Charisma replied firmly, effectively ending that line of conversation. "So where is the picture?" coming to stand behind Esmeralda.

With a click, Esmeralda showed her and in another moment, Charisma had sent the email winging towards Brianna's inbox. Then Charisma turned and looked at her friends. "C'mon - we need to get going if Saphira's not going to be late for her shift."

Saphira and Esmeralda exchanged glances, then nodded at Charisma and followed her from her study and out to the garage. Obviously they had upset her with their observations.

************

"Did she say anything else to you after you dropped me off at the diner?" Saphira asked Esmeralda much later that evening when they were getting ready for bed. She stepped into the bathroom to brush her teeth and Esmeralda followed her in with a hairbrush, gently pulling the tangles and snarls out of the long, dark hair. Saphira moaned in response and relaxed into the touch, garnering her a smile from Esmeralda.

"She apologized for being so curt - said she was embarrassed because she needed our help for something so obviously simple and basic."

Saphira arched a brow and snorted. "She needs to add denial to the skill section of her resume. Did she really think you would buy something that lame as an explanation?"

"She hoped I would. You didn't see the desperation in her eyes when she proffered her regret."

Saphira nodded, spitting and rinsing before she turned to ask, "Have you heard from Opal or Coral?"

"Briefly. Brianna is enjoying Dubai - she's relaxing, getting out in the sun... seems to be writing a lot."

"And Indi...?"

"Said Charisma made it safely to Mama's. Kent is supposed to be there tomorrow night, so he's there when Adam gets up on Christmas Eve."

"So things are status quo?"

"As far as I know. I haven't heard any differently from Mal."

Saphira stretched and dropped her robe at the end of the bed, then climbed naked under the covers with a sigh. The sigh became a growl when she watched Esmeralda do the same before she slid along Saphira's length.

"Have I mentioned how happy I am that you're feeling so much better?" Saphira asked as her hands began to wander over naked skin. She grinned rakishly when Esmeralda shivered at her touch, then urged her down until her mouth could take possession of Esmeralda's lips.

Esmeralda giggled when they separated for air, burying her face in Saphira's neck and nipping along the tendons until she reached the shell of Saphira's ear. "You may have mentioned it once or twice recently," she whispered, "but I never tired of you expressing your joy on the subject." She bit down lightly on the earlobe near her lips, then found herself flipped on her back with Saphira crouched over her like a predator.

"Well then," her blue eyes flashing fire and her voice causing a thrill to chase up Esmeralda's spine. "Allow me to express my joy again," she commanded, leaning down and capturing Esmeralda's lips in a passionate embrace once more.

"As often as you like, Love... as long as you remember that I get a turn too."

"In that case, Sweetheart, I may need to call in sick tomorrow. Because I plan to take my time with you... all night long." Saphira didn't give Esmeralda the chance to respond verbally, but words weren't necessary to facilitate their conversation.



Chapter LXXIV

"We probably should have slept a little," Saphira commented with a smile as sunlight started creeping into the bedroom some hours later. She and Esmeralda were cuddled up together in the middle of the bed and her hands traced random patterns over Esmeralda's sensitive skin.

"Why?" Esmeralda asked as she leaned up on one elbow to allow her to look down into twinkling blue eyes. "Are you tired?" pushing dark bangs off of Saphira's face. Saphira chuckled and cupped Esmeralda's cheek, stroking the skin with her thumb.

"I have enough energy at the moment to run a marathon," Saphira confessed. "But you...."

"... haven't felt this wonderful in forever, Phira. It's always been amazing for me to be loved by you, but last night it was like we were new all over again."

"For me too, Es. I've missed being with you like this."

"Me too. I think this break has been good for both of us."

"I know it has," Saphira countered. "And having Ruby take some of the workload and since Matilda has hired the new girl...."

"You've had an almost human schedule."

Saphira laughed. "I have indeed. It's been nice... almost restful. Now if Charisma and Brianna would just get with the plan...." Saphira tugged on Esmeralda's arm and waited until she resettled herself before she curled around her. "What did you think of that photograph Charisma sent Brianna yesterday?"

"About the picture itself? I think it's very telling. About the fact that she sent it? I think she wants things both ways, and frankly, I hope Brianna doesn't let her have it."

"Do you think Brianna's strong enough not to give in to her?"

Esmeralda sighed thoughtfully and considered her answer. "I do." She turned so she could see Saphira's profile in her periphery. "You didn't hear her when she called the other day, Love. She sounded so heart sore. And we know she said goodbye this time - to Charisma *and* Okasa."

"You know as anxious as I've been for this to be over with, I'm a little sad coming to the end."

Esmeralda crinkled her forehead and twisted until she could look into Saphira's eyes. "Why do you say that?"

"I'm sad because it looks like all your efforts and that of your team are going to have been in vain as far as Brianna and Charisma are concerned. Because I don't see Charisma leaving the land of denial - she's been there for twenty years and it's known and comfortable for her. And if Brianna has given up, then there really isn't much of anything left, is there?"

"Then why hasn't He called us home... or at least them home? Ruby and the girls are still here."

Saphira shrugged. "Maybe we have to wait until Brianna and Charisma see each other again before it's final. I dunno. What I do know is that I have to get ready for work. Wanna shower with me?"

Esmeralda grinned. "Now when have you ever known me to turn down an offer like that?"

The closing of the bathroom door cut off the sound of their banter.

************

"Kent... come in, come in. No need to stand on ceremony - you should know that by now." Kent ducked his head in acknowledgement of Patrick's words as he ushered him inside the study. "Did you have a good trip?"

"Mercifully short and free from stoppage," Kent said with a smile, nodding his head when Patrick held up a bottle of single malt whisky. He set his bag on one side of the room and dropped his jacket on top of it. "I didn't actually expect anyone to be up this late, but I saw your light, so I thought I'd take a chance and see if you were still awake."

"Just taking a little break," motioning around the room at the different Christmas gifts he was assembling for some of the older grandchildren. Kent winced and took a seat in the chair across from the one Patrick seated himself in

"Would you like some help?"

"I'd be delighted to accept," Patrick replied instantly. "I'm thankful the kids are spaced out enough that I don't have to do all eleven of them at once. Two or three a year is enough."

"It makes me thankful to have one child," Kent said.

"So you and Charisma aren't planning anymore then?" Patrick was well aware of what Charisma had told Okasa and the rest at Thanksgiving, but he was curious about Kent's feelings on the subject.

"No, I don't think so, Paddy. It's hard enough to find time to spend with Adam. I don't see how adding more children to the mix would help." Kent didn't mention the fact that he didn't expect to ever be that intimate with Charisma again, to say nothing of married to her, though he supposed she could surprise him by fighting for their marriage. He didn't think she would though, and he found he wasn't unduly upset by that fact. At least they would have an ending instead of continuing to live in limbo. Kent started when Patrick leaned forward and placed a hand on his arm.

"You all right, Kent? I didn't mean to throw a wrench into things by asking."

Kent chuckled. "You didn't, Paddy. I'm just tired and my mind tends to wander."

"Everything's all right then?"

"Everything's good, actually. The play's doing really well; business at the restaurant is steady." He shrugged. "No complaints, actually."

Patrick smiled. "That's good to hear." He swallowed his whisky and rose and Kent did the same. They moved back to the pile of parts Patrick still had to assemble.

"So I guess I'm the last to arrive?" Kent asked as he grabbed the frame Patrick motioned to and held it steady while Patrick slid the handlebars into place and took the lock nut Kent offered. Patrick chuckled and nodded.

"Yes - Charisma arrived yesterday afternoon and you arrived tonight, or this morning, rather. And since we don't count the boys and their families because they live here, that would definitely make you the last."

"Wait... where's everybody else? I know Mother is overseas. She called and told me she would be in London over the holidays visiting an 'old friend'." Kent looked his understanding of just what kind of friend he suspected his mother was sharing the holiday with and Patrick nodded his understanding. "But where are the rest that were here for Thanksgiving? The new friends we met," not mentioning anyone by name.

"Different things came up, I guess. Kay and her family have never spent Christmas Eve or Christmas day with us - instead they have always come on the twenty-eighth... halfway between Christmas and New Year's. Charisma said that Saphira had to work and of course Esmeralda chose to stay with her." Patrick paused. "Mama really likes them."

"You don't?"

"What?? No, I do too. But you know the old saying, so as long as Mama's happy...." seeing Kent acknowledge the truth of his words. "They seemed like genuine people and it was funny to watch Saphira confound Hunter. Not many do that."

"That's true - I'd like to see the video of that."

"Pretty sure we can accommodate you," Patrick assured Kent with a smile. He tightened the last sprocket on the bike Kent held and sighed. Kent set the finished bike aside, and they moved on to the next one. He waited until Patrick had the handlebars in place before he spoke again.

"What about Brianna?"

Patrick shrugged. "I'm not sure. Mama said... Mama said Brianna was going out of town."

"You don't believe her?"

"No, I do. I just don't understand why Brianna left so suddenly. According to Mama it was a last-minute decision. I'm kind of curious as to what prompted it." Even as the words spilled from Patrick's lips, Kent found himself wondering the same thing. Then he brought his attention back to Patrick who was still speaking. "... hasn't been here for Christmas Eve in a long time, she's always shared part of the Christmas holiday with us."

"You don't think she'll share with you when she gets back?"

Patrick met Kent's eyes, and Kent could see the unhappiness. "I don't think she's coming back, Kent. Not here anyway. She told Mama goodbye."

"I don't understand."

"I'm not sure I do either. I just know what Mama said. And Mama is rarely wrong about this kind of stuff." Kent nodded and they fell silent and focused their attention on the task at hand.

************

Brianna hissed as the masseuse loosened yet another knot in her shoulders. "Dig deep, Ramon."

The big man above her smiled and added more pressure to his efforts, chuckling silently when he got a loud groan for his trouble. "Better, Ms Walker?"

"So much. I can't tell you how wonderful...."

"You do not have to - your body speaks for itself. I do not know what you have done to develop such knots of stress, but I would like to recommend that you endeavor to end such activities."

"Soon, Ramon - a year and a half or so... give or take."

"If I was you, I would give as long as I removed myself from it."

"I'll take your words under advisement."

"You do that, Miss. You will feel better for it." He shifted his attention from her shoulders to her neck and she sucked in a breath at the pain that rippled through her. Ramon lifted his hands and stepped back from the table; Brianna shifted so she could look at him. "I am sorry, Ms Walker. Would you like me to work those out or move on to something less painful for you?"

"Make them go away, Ramon. A little pain now will mean less pain later. But maybe not quite as firmly to begin with?"

He nodded and walked back to the bed, easing her with his touch and feeling her relax again under his ministrations. "So how do you like Dubai, Miss?"

"I like it very much," Brianna replied without hesitation. "It may be my first visit, but I don't think it will be my last." She chuckled and Ramon smiled in puzzlement, though he never stopped his strokes along her neck. "I may have to take you home with me, though."

"Why Miss Walker - what would my wife say?"

"Take me with you?"

This time Ramon laughed aloud and Brianna laughed as well at the joyful sound he made. When he had himself under control once more, he resumed his massage. "You have met my wife, have you?" his voice still full of mirth. "Because that sounded very much like her."

"It's what I would say to you if I was her. However, I'm not going anywhere yet. I have more than a week left here, and I plan to enjoy every single minute I've got."

"Good - you should enjoy the steam room next. It will help keep you loose."

Brianna snorted. "Any looser and I'm going to be a puddle on the floor." She sat up and wrapped herself in the sheet Ramon had covered her with. He offered her a hand to help her stand, then motioned her towards the steam room. She bobbed her thanks. "Thank you, Ramon. I can't tell you how marvelous I feel."

"Come see me again before you leave. Perhaps it will keep your shoulders from mutating into knots again."

"I have scheduled myself with you for an hour at this time every day for the rest of my stay."

Ramon nodded. "Very good, Miss. I will see you on the morrow then." Without another word, Ramon strode from the room and Brianna took a deep breath before heading in the opposite direction for the steam bath that awaited her.

************

Charisma frowned at Kent when he crossed the threshold into the kitchen late Christmas Eve morning freshly showered and shaved. She hadn't heard him come in the night before, and in fact he hadn't been in the bedroom when she had woken some time earlier. He walked over and brushed a kiss over her cheek before accepting the mug of coffee Okasa held out to him. Kent kissed her as well and moved to sit at the table.

"I'm sorry I'm so late, Mama," he started, but she waved him off before he could finish.

"Don't worry about it, Kent. Paddy told me what happened last night." She glanced at the clock. "All things considered, it's not really that late. And since the boys and their families won't be here for another few hours, it's all good."

"Wait," Charisma cut in. "What happened last night?" She looked at Kent. "Why didn't you come to bed? Or are you just now arriving?"

"Take it easy, Charisma. I got in early this morning, but then I helped Paddy put the...." He looked around carefully and didn't see Adam, but he still lowered his voice before he continued. "The bikes and things together. So it was a lot closer to daylight than dark when I finally made it upstairs. I didn't want to disturb you, so I crashed in the guest room Mother usually uses when she's here."

Charisma took a moment to really look at her husband and she frowned again. "Is everything okay?" she asked suddenly. "You look tired."

Kent smiled. "I am tired, but everything is good... really. Work is keeping me busy in a good way, of course and I still haven't caught up from last night." He turned to Okasa. "I don't know how he does that every single year."

"Lots of practice," Okasa offered with a grin. "But you'll also notice he's not downstairs at the moment. He's still in bed. I'll get him up in another couple of hours and he'll be good to go until the party's over, so to speak."

"I heard we don't have quite as many here as we did at Thanksgiving." Kent looked at Charisma. "I'm sorry your friends couldn't make it. I really like them."

Charisma shrugged. "Me too. But I don't blame them for not wanting to make that quick of a turnaround either... especially not with Saphira's job." Charisma turned to Okasa. "I know Matilda is trying to help them out by giving Saphira as many hours as she can, but...."

"It's not ours to question, Daughter. And didn't you say Saphira worked doubles the entire time Es was out sick?"

"Yes, she did. But wouldn't that be a good reason to cut Saphira a little slack now?"

"They may not be able to afford it yet, Charisma. As sick as Es was purported to be, I imagine that wracked up some pretty hefty medical bills. And they don't either one strike me as the type to take charity willingly."

"No I don't think they are," Charisma agreed grudgingly. She turned back to Kent. "Where's your mother, by the way? Mama said something about London?"

Kent opened his mouth to explain and Okasa just watched them, struck by how independent of one another they appeared to be living their lives. She secretly wondered if they actually shared anything other than Adam's parentage. They did seem to care for one another, though, and enjoy each other's company. Kent said something wry and made a face, and they laughed. Charisma put her hand on his shoulder as they continued the conversation and Okasa wondered if Brianna's leaving had made Charisma decide to put more of an effort into her marriage. Then they both turned and looked at her with questioning expressions.

"What?"

"That's what we were wondering," Charisma replied. "You were staring at us with the most peculiar countenance."

"I wasn't actually looking at anything specific," Okasa denied. "I was just thinking."

"About...?" Kent drawled.

Okasa sighed. At least she could remind them that they had asked. "I was just wondering where Brianna was. Whenever she left before, I always knew where she was going and when she'd be back, but this time...."

"You know she'll be back in time for Congress to reconvene - she has to."

"That's when she'll be back in Washington, Charisma. I don't think she's coming back here again."

"Do you know why she left?" Kent asked, curious beyond words to know what he'd missed in his absence.

"She didn't say, and I didn't have the opportunity to ask," Okasa replied truthfully - not adding she was fairly confident what lay behind the defection. Kent nodded his acceptance of her words.

"I hope she'll surprise you and come home soon, Okasa. She seemed like good people to me. And I won't forget how she always kept an eye on Adam when he was around."

About that time, Ame and Adam walked in from the backyard and Adam took off like a shot as soon as he saw Kent. "PA!" he exclaimed. Kent knelt down to receive the hug Adam offered, then swooped him up into his arms.

"Brr!!" Kent said, rubbing their noses together. "You're cold, Boy!"

"Cold outside, Pa. Come play?"

"Let me go grab my coat and you can ride the Big Wheel for me, all right?" Adam nodded wildly, causing laughter to race around the room. Ame stepped up and took him from Kent.
"I'll take him potty while you get ready, Mr. Rockwell. It's why we came in to begin with."

"All right. I'll be ready in a minute." He turned to Charisma. "You coming?"

"Maybe in a few," shaking her head. "You two should have a little father/son time first.

"Okay... you know where to find us when you're ready."

"I certainly do."



Chapter LXXV

"Hail! Hail! The gang's all here!" Ruby singsonged when Mal and Indi crossed the threshold together. They each took a mug of the hot chocolate that Ruby offered them before finding a seat on the floor in the living room where everyone else was gathered.

"Jade is keeping an eye on Kent and Charisma?" They both nodded and Esmeralda turned to Opal with a smile. "Who lost the toss?" Opal chuckled.

"Neither, actually. But since I'm with Brianna during a majority of her waking hours...."

"Fair enough. All right, the reason I called you all here is because I think you all need to be made aware of what's happened in that past few days. It's very likely this assignment will be ending soon." Gasps echoed around the room and the angels looked at one another before everyone's attention refocused on Esmeralda.

"Are you sure, Es?" Amber asked. "Have you heard from Him?"

Esmeralda shook her head. "No. But the way things have played out, I am making an educated guess." She held up her hand to stop the murmurs and muttering before it started. "Let me bring you up to date, and then you can tell me what you think."

So she told them - of Kent's filing for separation papers; of Charisma's discovery about Brianna's feelings and her possession of the letters; of Brianna's defection from the Tagherty's lives.

"So this is serious then," Ruby commented. "It really is the end. But... then why hasn't He called us home to file our reports on this case?"

Esmeralda sighed and rubbed her fingers over her forehead before pinching the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger. "Well, we do still have quite a few loose ends." She turned to Amber and Indi. "I noticed the box of letters wasn't on the coffee table when Saphira and I were there the other day. What did Charisma do with them?"

Indi shrugged. "She didn't touch them when I was with her, but the box was gone two days after she got it from Brianna. So I don't know what happened with them exactly."

"Oh no... I got to watch that bout of craziness," Amber chimed in drolly, causing laughter to ripple around the room. Esmeralda sent up another prayer of thanksgiving for Amber. No matter what they were facing, she always offered a much-appreciated respite from the seriousness that always seemed to surround them, and Esmeralda was grateful. She gave Amber an indebted smile.

"Would you like to share or would you prefer to suffer in silence?"

Saphira snorted. "When was the last time she was silent about anything... suffering or not?" Amber glared at her, then smirked.

"Pot... kettle. It's not like we didn't hear you this morning."

Saphira blushed, but returned the smirk. "Jealous, much?"

"All right, you two!" Esmeralda said, her own skin the color of a Mr. Lincoln rose. "Can we get back to the topic at hand, please?"

"Sorry, Es," Amber muttered. "I want you to know that I was really glad to hear it - aside from the ragging opportunities it gives me," leering at Saphira who promptly stuck out her tongue, "it's just really good to know you're feeling better."

"It's really good to feel better too. However, that still doesn't tell us what happened to those letters."

"Oh, that was something. You know about Okasa's visit," waiting for the nod. "Well, I guess Charisma basically ignored that box the entire day," waiting for Indi to confirm her words. "By the time I got there that night, she was back to glaring at it. She must've scowled at that box for over an hour - personally I was waiting for it to spontaneously combust. Honestly, the plastic should have at least melted she was staring at it so fiercely." Amber shook her head and took a deep breath to continue.

"Finally she crossed over to the table and walked slowly around it several times, still glaring at it. And then she opened it."

When Amber didn't resume her discourse, Esmeralda cleared her throat. "Amber?"

Amber shook her head again. "It was weird, Es. Charisma opened that box and froze. She sat there completely unmoving for the better part of five minutes. A tear slid slowly down her face - a single tear, Es... I'm not even sure she was aware of it. She bit her lip and took a deep breath, and this time when the tears fell, they did so quickly and in mass quantities. Charisma wiped her face savagely; I wouldn't have been surprised to have seen blood follow the action. She was really rough. She slammed the lid back on the box and shoved it off the table, like she was trying to make it go away.

Of course everything flew out of it - she hadn't secured the top and she screamed in reaction. Seriously, Es - Charisma screamed. Not words or invectives or epithets - it was more like a howl of frustration. Then she slammed the box back on the table and began throwing bundles of letters into it. She didn't even look at what she was doing - just threw them in haphazardly as she grabbed them from where they scattered. When she had them all, Charisma slammed the lid back on, only this time, she snatched the whole thing off the table and moved it over to the fireplace where she dropped it with such force I expected to see cracks in the brick.

She flipped on the gas - I guess she wasn't really thinking about the mess that would cause. Honestly, I don't think she would have cared had she considered it. She was really furious - I could feel the anger radiating off her in waves. When she had the flames set high enough, she threw the lid to one side and reached into the box. And then she just... stopped."

"And then?" when the silence started to drag on.

"She looked at them... really looked. She took them out carefully and examined each bundle. Okasa had bundled them together by year, and the oldest stacks were by far the thickest. They decreased considerably after Charisma's marriage, though there were still letters for each of those years as well."

"Did she open them?"

Amber shook her head. "No. She simply reorganized them back into chronological order, then replaced them neatly in the box. When she was done, Charisma took them upstairs and stashed the container in her closet. When she was satisfied with their location, she returned downstairs to shut off the fireplace and lock everything up for the night. She spent most of the rest of my shift that night shifting between glaring at the closet door and staring at the album. Not the pictures... just the album itself."

"So the letters are a definite loose end," Ruby agreed after a few minutes of silence. "What else is still unresolved? Aside from the obvious," she tacked on at the disbelieving glances her words garnered her from the others. "There has to be more."

"There is also the issue of Kent's possession of separation papers. Just the fact that he had them drawn up makes them a consideration for us. Even though he has not served them, and may never serve them...." Esmeralda broke off at the sight of Mal shaking her head. "Mal?"

"I think they are more than a consideration for us at this point, Es. I'm confident that he will be serving those documents to Charisma - if not now, then eventually."

"Even if Brianna is removed from the picture?" Saphira asked before anyone else could speak up.

"Yes." Mal paused and pinched her lip thoughtfully. Then she sighed. "It's hard to explain," holding up a hand to forestall any comments before she could continue. "Kent has changed since I've been assigned to watch over him - grown more serious... more mature, maybe. He's spent a lot of time in New York by himself, and it's brought home some hard truths."

"He shared these with you?" Ruby asked.

"In a manner of speaking," Mal replied. "He was writing a letter to Charisma."

"Wait - you're telling me he plans to break up with his wife by writing a 'Dear Jane' letter??" Opal nearly screeched. "Talk about harsh!"

"I don't think so," Mal replied, running a nervous hand through her hair. "I mean, I don't think he plans to write her a 'Dear Jane' letter. I think he was writing out a letter so he could memorize his lines, so to speak."

"So he doesn't forget anything when the time comes to actually break things off with her?"

"Exactly. He wants her to understand that it's not Brianna that brought this about - that she was just the missing piece in the puzzle." Mal sighed again. "I should have just stolen the letter and brought it with me so you could see it for yourselves," she muttered before raising her voice to a normal level again. "He reminded her that they've always been friends, but rarely been lovers; that they live completely separate lives even on the occasions when they share a house; that though they love one another they are not and never have been in love with each other; and that the only real thing they have in common anymore is Adam."

"What does he say about Brianna?"

Mal shook her head. "He hadn't gotten very far on that part - only that it was her return to Charisma's life that showed him how much they were both missing by pretending. And that they all deserved better than a life of pretense. Kent wrote that pretense was fine for the stage - that was where it belonged, but life was meant to be shared and enjoyed, not simply endured."

"Wow. He could be a writer with that insight."

"So what changed?" Turq asked. "Wait... I get that Brianna returning to make him *admit* this stuff, but the fact is that all the things Mal mentioned have been part of their relationship from the start. He knew going in that Charisma saw him as more friend than lover and that a big part of the reason they were getting married was to give her a child and him an heir, right?" seeing heads nod thoughtfully around her. "Okay, so what made him decide to do something about it now?"

Everyone looked at Mal and she shrugged. "I don't know... honestly. Maybe he's found someone else, but I haven't seen any evidence of that. Since I've been assigned to him, most of his time has been spent at the theatre getting this play off the ground, or going back and forth to spy on Charisma. He hasn't really given any indication of an affair."

"Perhaps his paramour refuses to play second fiddle," Saphira offered, looking at Esmeralda. "It would make sense that anyone wanting to really make a life with him would want Kent to resolve things with Charisma first. Or Kent could even have insisted it be that way," watching Esmeralda nod her agreement. "We know he cares for her - I doubt, especially given the letter that Mal overheard him rehearsing, that Kent wants to destroy Charisma's career with public embarrassment and humiliation."

"They're all good possibilities," Esmeralda agreed, giving Saphira a thankful smile. She turned to Mal. "Try to keep a lookout; I'm gonna send Jade back with you when you go back to the City with Kent. I think things are gonna pick up fairly quickly, and it'll be good for you to have some help there. Maybe between you both you'll be able to discover if he has an angle beyond Charisma's welfare."

Mal nodded. "Thanks, Es."

"Is there anything else that could be considered a loose end?" Amber asked, slumping a little when Esmeralda nodded solemnly.

"Yes, but they are smaller concerns. We have the Taghertys' reaction to Brianna's terminating her contact with them; Kay's response to Charisma; Charisma's and Brianna's return to work...." She trailed off and the rest sat waiting for her to finish. When it became apparent that Esmeralda had ended the thought in her head, Saphira prodded her gently.

"Es? You wanna share with the rest of us?"

"I'm not even sure it's viable," Esmeralda confessed, and Saphira waited knowing that Esmeralda was now processing out loud. Saphira held up a hand to keep the rest from interrupting. "But I was just thinking... what about those tickets?"

"Tickets?" Saphira repeated. "I'm not sure I'm following, Es. What tickets?"

"Six months from now, give or take a week or so, there should be a special delivery made to both Charisma Tagherty and Brianna Walker. Charisma, unwilling to admit that Brianna's departure in Barcelona was really goodbye, told Okasa about their plans to revisit Europe together. Despite her doubts, Okasa made the arrangements - the trip is paid for and the tickets purchased. So unless Okasa has actually canceled things since Brianna's return to Charisma's life...."

"I wonder if that's our deadline," Ruby mused aloud. "It would make sense."

"But we have no real way of knowing," Jas pointed out. "So we just...."

"We just keep doing what we've been doing. This is so far out of our hands anymore it's all we can do."

************

"Kay... Lee... come in, come in," Patrick welcomed several days later as he opened the door to his home. "Everyone else is already here," motioning them towards the large family room that the children gravitated to naturally. The kids raced off to join the rest of the crew that were currently bundling up and preparing to head outside to take advantage of the new snow. Kay looked around carefully, then made sure her brood were well protected against the cold before letting them head outdoors again. She smiled when Harley naturally took Adam's hand with a word of reassurance to Charisma, and thrilled when Michelle automatically took Adam's other hand instead of Harley's.

When the children were outside, Kay turned to Patrick, though her eyes never left Charisma's back as she keep her eyes focused on the children outside the window. Kay lowered her voice. "Paddy, where's Brianna?" Even from the distance, Kay felt Charisma's body stiffen at her low question.

Patrick cleared his throat. "You may want to talk to Mama about that," cutting his eyes in Charisma's direction, but keeping his tone level. Kay drew in a sharp breath and let it out slowly. Then she nodded her understanding and moved around the room saying her hellos, bypassing Charisma as she made her way out the door and towards the kitchen to find Okasa.

Okasa wasn't surprised when Kay crossed the threshold - it was why she'd asked the girls to wait until she called them to come into the kitchen. She took a deep breath and met Kay's eyes sorrowfully.

"What happened?"

Okasa shook her head. "I don't have the details. You'll have to ask Brianna or Charisma to share them. All I know is that Brianna called me a few days ago and said goodbye," tears flooding her eyes, though she blinked rapidly to prevent them from spilling over.

"Whaddya mean - she said goodbye?? Like...."

"Like she was leaving and wouldn't be back."

"Do you know where she went?"

Okasa shook her head again. "She didn't say. She basically indicated that she was severing all ties with us, and that we needed to let her go. She even removed me from her visitor's list at her apartment building."

"Wow... okay. So why didn't you call me immediately??"

"And ruin your holiday too? Kay, there's nothing you could have done... nothing you can do now. Brianna would have called you if she'd wanted you to do something, and I'm guessing that she didn't. Charisma told me she had been in touch with Esmeralda, but apparently she needs some space from the rest of us. Because she hasn't taken any of our calls."

Kay bit her lip. "She didn't take mine either, come to think of it. She returned it, but she didn't answer when I called her."

"At least she returned yours," Okasa said painfully. "She's basically excised the entire Tagherty clan from her life."

"You're wrong, you know," Kay said fiercely as she stood a little straighter. "There is something I can do now."

"Please don't," Okasa asked. "She's been through enough."

Kay snorted. "She hasn't been through anything she didn't bring on herself, Mama O. And this time she's dragging us all along with her. It's time everyone stops pandering to her and someone sets her straight... so to speak."

"You really think she'll take it well from you, Kay?"

"Okasa, I don't think she's going to take it *well* from anyone. But the fact is, I'm about the only one both willing and able to speak on the subject. I'm not particularly worried about the fallout and I warned her to be careful with Brianna."

"You did? When?" Okasa shook her head. "I mean obviously it must have been at Thanksgiving, but how did I miss it?"

"Things were a little hectic around here, Mama O."

"I guess. I just...." Okasa met Kay's eyes and held them, wanting her to see the truth. "Kay, I love Brianna like my own, you know that. But Charisma...."

"Charisma what?" queried a voice from the doorway. Blue eyes looked between them and flashed anger and something much deeper before she pinned Kay with her stare. "Charisma what, Mama?"

"Charisma...."

"I think you and I should take this outside, Charisma," Kay said without missing a beat. "Get your things and we'll take a walk."

"Is that an order?"

"More like a forceful invitation... unless you'd prefer to air your dirty laundry to all and sundry here. And somehow, I don't think you're ready for that - even if your husband isn't among those present."

"Leave him out of this!" Charisma said softly from between clenched teeth.

"But of course. It's not like he's a part of much where you're concerned, is he? Now fetch your coat. It's time we talked."



Chapter LXXVI

"So I'm guessing this is another one of those traditions that I haven't been privy to," Charisma commented once she and Kay were well away from the Tagherty house. They had left by the front door and made their way down the street towards the neighborhood park in silence. Charisma had used that time to collect herself. She released a deep breath and forced herself to relax.

"You could say that," Kay said as they stepped onto the playground. "I'll admit I was a little surprised to see you here," her voice calm and level. "I mean, for the better part of twenty years you've never been anywhere near here after Christmas. So why are you here now, Charisma? Shouldn't you be somewhere putting in an appearance or...?"

Charisma shrugged. As furious as she was at Kay for her presumption, she really couldn't fault her for her concern. And she appreciated that Kay had the foresight to remove them from the house before beginning their discussion. Because judging by the look on Kay's face and the gnawing in Charisma's belly, this had the potential to get very ugly. "Kent had to get back to the city - the theatre never stops, you know. So I decided to take a few days off to spend with the family here. I've been so busy running the circuit this recess that I've had very little time to just sit and regroup." She chuckled lightly. "Despite everything, I miss time with my brothers and their families."

"So it's just coincidence that you're here when Brianna usually joins your family for the holiday?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" bitingly.

"It's a simple question, Senator. Why are you getting so defensive about it?"

Charisma stopped walking and whirled to face Kay, her eyes blazing with a myriad of emotions. "Excuse me?? Just who exactly do you think you are?" feeling her composure fly right out the proverbial window. "What gives you the right...?"

"I'll tell you who I am, Senator. I am the woman who loved Brianna Walker... even though it was never enough to exorcise your ghost. Part of me will always love her, and that part recognizes the importance of your place in her heart and life. That gives me the right! The fact that you've caused Brianna to leave *my* family... HER family... gives me the right!"

"MY family."

"Hers as well, Charisma. You made her part of it, remember? And now you've taken it away again."

"Wait just a damn minute!"

"For what, Senator??" Kay's voice was a calm, cool counterpoint to Charisma's heat. "Are you going to stand there and tell me her leaving wasn't the direct result of her interaction with you? Because I know better. For twenty years you've been out of her immediate circle and she's been part of all of our lives," motioning around her. "Then suddenly you're back and she walks away from everyone... EVERYONE!" Kay huffed impatiently, then took a deep breath. "She would never have said goodbye to Mama O if she hadn't been pushed into it. She's called the Taghertys family for nearly a quarter century, Charisma - that isn't something she would have walked away from voluntarily."

"So of course it has to be my fault! She bears no responsibility at all for her actions - is that what you're telling me??"

"Of course she bears responsibility for her actions... but only some of it. Some of the responsibility and blame for this fiasco lies squarely on your shoulders, Senator, and it's high time you faced up to that fact! You're both culpable here!"

Charisma narrowed her eyes. "You've got a lot of nerve."

Kay shoved her clenched hands into her pockets to keep from doing something monumentally stupid... like shake some sense into a deliberately obtuse United States Senator. She couldn't remember the last time she had struggled so hard to maintain her sense of self-control. Another deep breath, and she spoke calmly again. "I'm going to say something to you, Charisma, and you're going to listen. What you do with the information after that is your own business, but I'm going to tell you something that no one else... not even Brianna... is willing to say to you, because no one wants to put you on the spot or make you uncomfortable or hurt your feelings." Kay cocked her head and regarded Charisma steadily, not surprised to see anger and contempt as the chief emotions reflected back at her.

But it was Kay's job to read people, and she could see so much more in Charisma's eyes. She saw pain and fear and longing, and Kay had to wonder how Charisma could deny such strong emotions. Brown eyes held blue for a long moment and Kay could see Charisma's desire to squirm, but she held firm.

"But you'd take great delight in that wouldn't you, Dr. Williams?" Charisma's words and tone were biting and she steadfastly refused to refer to Kay more familiarly. Kay tilted her head and regarded Charisma thoughtfully.

"Why do you think that, Senator?" offering Charisma the same professional courtesy that had been extended to her, though for different reasons. "Wait," holding up a hand. "I want you to really think about your answer. I want to know why you believe I would get some sort of perverse pleasure out of seeing you in pain."

"Not just seeing," Charisma spat.

Kay's eyes widened. "You think I like *causing* you pain?"

"You already said as much," Charisma said, her timbre suddenly flat and without the slightest hint of inflection.

"No," Kay disputed. "That's not what I said at all." She looked around and spotted a snow-covered bench set under some denuded trees. She gestured with her head. "Would you like to walk around the park or shall we sit for this conversation? I think it's safe to say we're not going to be overheard or interrupted either way," holding her hand out to catch the snowflakes that had just begun to fall.

"I'm fairly certain my wants aren't going to figure into this at all. We might as well walk - at least we'll be warmer." Kay nodded and they set off across the cleared path.

Silence reigned again for a few moments as Kay gathered her thoughts once more. Charisma stayed quiet, refusing to start a discussion she didn't even want to have. The only reason she hadn't left was because she was confident that this woman... this doctor... would follow her to Washington to have this conversation if need be. And as much as she had no desire to hear or interest in hearing what Kay had to say, she wanted her saying it in Washington even less. That town had ears everywhere, and Charisma had the distinct impression that whatever Kay had to say, it was not meant for public consumption. Finally Kay took a deep breath and started to speak.

"First of all - my goal here is not to cause you pain, Charisma. My goal is to be completely honest with you... something everyone around you is afraid to do because they want to protect you... even if it's from yourself. Please let me finish," Kay requested. "I promise I will listen to any rebuttal you would like to make or answer whatever questions you have when I'm done." Charisma clamped her lips together and nodded, crossing her arms over her chest and waiting.

"Thank you. Charisma - you're already in pain. You have been for a very long time... probably since Brianna first left and you realized she wasn't coming back to you." Kay shook her head. "You've been in pain so long, it's become the norm for you - it's one reason you're holding onto it so tightly. It's been your most faithful companion."

"What would you know about it?" Charisma grumbled quietly, as though to herself. Kay smiled sadly.

"I do this for a living, Charisma; I see other peoples' pain every day. But your pain is familiar to me - for as long as I've known her I've seen your pain reflected in the eyes of one I love." Kay waited, but Charisma remained silent and she recognized that Charisma was making an effort to abide by their earlier pact. "Charisma, I want you to be honest with yourself and honest with me. There's no one here to hear us, and everything you say to me will be held in the strictest confidence of doctor/patient privilege. No one - not Okasa, not Kent and not Brianna - no one will know what is said between us unless you decide to share it."

"Even though you're not actually my doctor?"

"Even then - I take my oath very seriously, Charisma." Charisma held Kay's eyes a long moment, then nodded and gestured for her to continue. "How do you feel about Brianna Walker, Charisma?"

"I love her," through clenched teeth. "She's my best friend."

"That's all?"

"Isn't that enough?"

"Completely honest, Charisma. You hate her a little bit too, don't you? For putting you into this position - for leaving you alone and forcing you to live without her... despite everything."

"NO!" A beat. "Yes," in a much more subdued tone. "I just...." Charisma uncrossed her arms and jammed her hands into her pockets so hard Kay fully expected to see them come clean through the material. She waited, but Charisma didn't say anything else. She merely compressed her lips together a little tighter than before. Kay sighed.

"I'm going to tell you some things, Charisma - some truths that I think you know but are unwilling to face. It's probably going to hurt you to hear them, but they need to be said."

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"No, they don't need to be said."

"I think they do. The only way you're going to purge the pain you've carried with you for twenty years... the only way you're going to find real happiness and a measure of peace... is to lance the wound that is still festering in your heart."

"You can't make me listen."

Kay shook her head. "No, I really can't. But I think you know how much you need to, and part of you wants to believe I can do something... anything... to make things better."

"Why do you care?"

"Excuse me?" Kay repeated, wondering how she'd lost control of the conversation again. Her mental lips twitched. It reminded her very much of some discussions she and Brianna had shared - some of them about the woman now glaring at her like she was a two-headed gorgon.

"I said...."

"I heard you, Charisma. Why would you think I wouldn't care? Despite the fact that you and I started on the wrong foot because of who I am and who I've been in Brianna's life, I really don't get off on inflicting pain or watching people around me suffer if I can do something about it. And I care about you by extension because you're important to Brianna."

"So you're doing this for Brianna."

"I'm doing this for you," Kay replied with a hint of exasperation. "If it helps Brianna, that's a bonus I can live with."

"I really don't like you very much."

"I know. Jealousy's a hard thing to overcome."

"I'm not...."

"Yes, you are, Charisma. Complete honesty, remember? You don't just love her... you're *in love* with her, and it galls you that Brianna and I were lovers; it just incenses you to know that I have touched her in ecstasy, tasted her passion, heard her cry out her pleasure...."

"THAT'S ENOUGH!!!"

"Why?" Kay asked reasonably. "It's the truth, Charisma. You can't stand that I've had what you so desperately want. That red-hot burning you feel in your veins right now? That's pure, unadulterated jealousy."

Charisma scoffed, though her eyes told a different story as did her clenched fists. Kay wondered how much more she'd have to push before Charisma took a swing. "Why would I be jealous of you and Brianna as a couple? All I ever wanted for her was happiness."

"LIAR!" wanting to snort when Charisma's eyes widened. "You wanted her happiness WITH YOU."

Wide blue eyes narrowed until Charisma was glaring. "Excuse me?? Just because you couldn't make Brianna happy...."

"I did," Kay stated unequivocally. "We were happy; but neither of us was willing to live with your ghost in the middle of our relationship. However, this isn't about me making Brianna happy except as it infuriates you. Because it does, doesn't it? It's driving you crazy to stand there and pretend indifference to the fact that I've had the one thing in life you really want - the one you could have had if you hadn't denied the truth of your heart...."

Whatever else Kay was going to say was cut off by the stinging slap across her face that Charisma delivered with the flat of her palm.

"That's enough." Charisma's voice was pure ice now.

"That was your one free shot, Charisma. Do you feel better now?" Kay asked calmly as she wiped a drop of blood from the corner of her lip. "Hitting me doesn't change the fact that you are as in love with Brianna Walker as she is with you and always have been."

"That's enough."

"Nor does it change the fact that you are too much of a coward to do anything about it."

"That's. Enough." This time the sound was emitted through clenched teeth and was as sharp as glass. Kay was tempted to look for bleeding wounds, but she refused to give Charisma any quarter - not when she was this close to a breakthrough.

"How does it feel, Charisma? Knowing you could have everything you ever wanted - knowing you could be truly happy - and being unwilling to make it happen. You're a selfish woman, Charisma, and nothing but a coward. Personally, I think Brianna is better off without you in her life."

"THAT'S ENOUGH!!!"

Kay was ready when Charisma swung this time, catching her arm in the palm of her hand and using Charisma's own momentum to turn her until she was standing with her back to Kay's front.

"Let me go," Charisma growled, struggling to free herself from Kay's grasp.

"No." Kay shook her head firmly.

"I am a United States Senator! I demand you release me at once."

"You could get free if you really wanted me to let you go." Kay felt the fight flow out of Charisma's body, but she made no effort to pull away from Charisma and noticed Charisma was doing nothing to escape her clasp either. "You're a woman in pain, Charisma. There's no shame in needing someone... even if that person is someone you really don't want to need."

"I don't need you, Kay Williams," Charisma whispered. "And I can't need her."

Finally, Kay thought. Finally we're getting somewhere. "Why, Charisma? Why can't you need her?"

Kay felt Charisma slump a little further, and she tightened her grip to keep them from sinking to the snow-covered ground. The paths that had been shoveled already had a light dusting of new snow and she had no desire to try and melt it.

"Please let me go."

Kay relaxed her arms and Charisma stepped out of her embrace and wrapped her arms around herself. She kept her back to Kay, and Kay tried to respect that to a degree. It didn't mean she was going to stop pushing.

"Talk to me, Charisma. Why can't you need Brianna?"

Charisma snorted. "I know my family seems to think a lot of you, so you can't possibly be as stupid as you sound like right now. But just in case you need a refresher, let me spell it out for you, okay? I am a United States Senator, and because of that, people expect certain things from me. Like a husband and children - though in my case it will only be one child... singular. They expect...."

"Well, that's your first problem, Charisma - you probably need to come out of that ivory tower you're living in. Maybe you should stop trying to live to other peoples' expectations - none of your colleagues do, or are you really that naïve?? Stop," Kay commanded with an upraised hand when Charisma whirled around to respond to her. "You know the kind of bullshit that goes on in those 'hallowed halls'," her tone mocking and derisive. "It's good to have standards, Charisma. Just make sure they're your own and not everyone else's expectations."

"And what about my family?" facing away from Kay again.

Kay shrugged, even though Charisma couldn't see it. "What about them? C'mon, Charisma... do you really think they don't know... that they haven't known for years? They knew before you did... certainly long before you ever considered it to be more than a passing fancy. It's one reason they welcomed Brianna into the fold so easily - then they did it because they liked her for herself. Even Kent...."

Charisma whirled and raised clenched fists before slamming them to her sides. "Even Kent what??"

"Charisma, Kent is not a stupid man. If he doesn't already know, I'd be amazed. You weren't exactly subtle at Thanksgiving."

"We didn't DO anything at Thanksgiving."

"You didn't have to, Charisma. It's simply part and parcel of who you are together." Kay hesitated, then straightened. "You don't have to accept it, Charisma - you can spend the next twenty years in the same kind of denial and uber contentment that you've lived the last twenty years in. No one but me is going to call you on your behavior and I won't bring it up again. Because it's your choice and your life." She took a deep breath. "But you have a chance for real, genuine happiness - and more than just you would benefit if you choose correctly. You just have to be brave enough to love the one who holds your heart and always has." Kay walked towards Charisma until they were standing side by side, though they both kept their focus distant. "Question is - can you live with yourself if you choose to be happy instead of keeping a code that you don't even really believe in?"

Without another word, Kay walked off the playground and headed back towards the Taghertys. She stopped when she reached the tree where Hunter was waiting.

"Are you all right?" he asked. "I saw her swing, but you shook your head so I...."

"You did the right thing. I'm fine. But you may want to stay here and keep an eye on her... just in case. I'll send someone down to give you a break in a few minutes."

Hunter shook his head. "Just send some coffee. I'll be all right. It'll be like a stakeout." Kay smiled and nodded, and turned to walk away. Hunter clasped her hand. "Thanks, Kay. Thanks for caring enough to say something to her."

"I was the only one that could," she reminded him, then walked back to the warmth of the house.



Chapter LXXVII

"So what happened after Kay said her piece, Indi?" Esmeralda asked. Indi had requested to speak to her alone, and Esmeralda had to wonder what had caused her to make such an unusual demand. One of the things the other angels seemed to appreciate about Esmeralda's management style was her willingness to share information and let everyone see the big picture. It had made her one of the most successful guardians to date. So she was more than a little intrigued by Indigo's petition.

Indi shook her head and sighed. "I'm not... I mean... Charisma's acting weird."

Esmeralda blinked. "I'm going to guess that's not a good thing."

Indi shrugged. "You tell me. After Kay left the playground, Hunter kept an eye on Charisma until Forrest arrived. She was just sitting there... not moving - I'm still not sure what she was focused on. I'm not even sure she noticed her brothers until they actually made physical contact with her. Together they got Charisma wrapped in the blanket Okasa sent and got her back to the Tagherty homestead. The only people still there were Rocky, Okasa and Patrick. Even Adam was gone as Ame had gone with the wives and the Williams' and taken all the kids to Chuck E. Cheese."

"Okay, so what happened?"

"Nothing," Indi growled in disgust. "Okasa took Charisma upstairs - settled her into a bath to warm her up and when she went in to check on her, Charisma was tucked into bed asleep. This morning Charisma was gone - left a note for Ame telling her to bring Adam home tomorrow - he's been having so much fun playing with his cousins that Charisma didn't want to take him away from that any sooner than necessary."

"Did she speak to Okasa before she left?"

Indi shook her head. "She wrote her a note as well. But it was kind of vague and... awkward... almost stilted. Like she really didn't know what to say anymore or how to say it. She thanked her for the holiday and for looking after Adam and expressed a desire to see them again in the near future."

Esmeralda's brows rose into her hairline. "Are you serious? She wrote a perfunctory, polite hostess note to her mother??"

"Pretty much. Okasa was cool about it; she just picked up the phone and called Charisma. When the call went to voicemail, she called Kay to find out about what happened with Charisma in the park. She wasn't happy with the fact the Kay refused to share what her conversation with Charisma entailed, but Okasa stopped badgering her when Kay claimed confidentiality. Okasa then explained her concern over Charisma's discombobulation and Kay assured her it was to be expected."

Esmeralda nodded her head slowly. "So why'd you want to tell me this in private, Indi? You know my policy on keeping everyone in the loop."

"I do, but I thought you might want a chance to digest this alone first. I know everyone basically thinks this mission is over and that we failed our task to bring them together."

"But you don't."

"After yesterday, I think we've just gotten to the beginning of the end. There's so much in play right now... especially after everything that Kay said to Charisma. I think Kay may be the key to this thing getting resolved positively, because she's pushed Charisma out of her comfort zone in Egypt and right into a state of awareness that Charisma is completely unfamiliar with." Indi sighed. "I just don't think we're going to get called home straight away."

"I'm inclined to agree," Esmeralda said with a slow nod. "Thanks, Indi. I appreciate the consideration. I will probably ask you to share everything you just shared with me again.

"I know," Indi smiled. "But at least you won't be taken by surprise by it." A knock on the door brought their heads around just as Saphira stuck her head in.

"Everything all right?" looking between them before meeting Esmeralda's eyes. Esmeralda smiled and nodded, even as she held out a hand to Saphira. Saphira accepted it and lifted it to her lips to brush a kiss over the knuckles. "Opal's here - Brianna just got back into town."

"I'll just...." Indi motioned towards the living room and headed out, closing the door behind her softly. Saphira cocked an eyebrow in Esmeralda's direction.

"Was it something I said?"

"I think our loose ends have started tying up a lot faster than we expected." Before she could elaborate, a knock sounded on the door again, and Ruby poked her head in.

"Es? You're gonna wanna come out here. Mal just arrived."

Saphira and Esmeralda exchanged glances. "Never rains but it pours," Saphira muttered and tugged Esmeralda to her feet so they could go hear the next part of the saga they were enmeshed in.

************

"Well, Brianna's demeanor is in complete contrast to Charisma's," Opal offered when Indi was done sharing Charisma's story. "She spent her holiday relaxing - daily massages, meditation, relaxation therapy even. She did some writing as well. Otherwise, she took advantage of the fact that she was in Dubai sightseeing and such." Opal turned and looked at Esmeralda with a smile. "I'm pretty sure you'll be seeing new pictures grace her walls in the next few weeks. She took a lot of them."

"Do you think she's over Charisma?"

Opal snorted. "I don't think Brianna will ever be *over* Charisma. But I do think she's moved beyond her - not far, but she's taken the first step to putting Charisma in her past."

"Of course," Saphira griped. "Somebody finally switches on a light in the darkness of denial that Charisma's been walking around in for years, and Brianna decides to move on." She looked at Opal. "Can I ask what her step was?" At Opal's confounded look, Saphira sighed and rubbed her forehead. "You said she took the first step to putting Charisma in her past," waiting for Opal to nod. "What did she do that you considered her first step?"

"She deleted the email Charisma sent her, then purged her computer of all the pictures she had of her and Charisma together."

"Does she still have the album?"

"To my knowledge."

"Still, that's a pretty big first step. She's had those pictures on every computer she's had the last twenty years. And we know she wanted a copy of that photograph Charisma sent her - she specifically asked for it." Esmeralda turned her head to one side and let her eyes center on nothing in particular while she pinched her bottom lip thoughtfully. Everyone else remained respectfully silent, waiting for her focus to return to them. Finally, Esmeralda sighed and looked at Mal. "Talk to me, Mal. What brings you back to DC again so soon?"

"Kent." She turned to Indi. "Are you sure he wasn't at the Tagherty's when Kay confronted Charisma? Maybe he snuck back when Jade and I weren't looking??"

"Absolutely. He left on Christmas night - he was there just short of two days. You know that - you left when he did. There is no way the three of us could have missed him coming back to the Tagherty's for any reason."

"Why? What happened?" Esmeralda broke the tableau between Indi and Mal.

"I don't know... honestly. That's what makes me think I missed something significant." Mal scrubbed a hand over her face and into her hair. "This morning Kent called his lawyer and requested those papers. Then he called to ask Charisma to give him some time on Sunday."

"You think he knows what went down between Charisma and Kay the other day?"

"Not unless he's more clairvoyant than all of us combined," Mal said with a shake of her head. "And unless he's got some sort of undercover operative we know nothing about, I'm not sure how he could have heard about it either."

"He may not have needed to."

"Es?"

Esmeralda's comment and Saphira's follow-up question turned all heads in Esmeralda's direction. She bit her lip, then took a deep breath. "I think we can all agree that Kent Rockwell isn't a stupid man, correct? Despite his easy going attitude, he's a pretty sensitive guy, right?" She waited for everyone to nod their agreement. "So why is it so hard to believe that he couldn't pick up the difference in Charisma's behavior from Thanksgiving to Christmas?"

"You think...?"

"Let's consider the things we know - he's been coming back to Washington to spy on Charisma, for lack of a better term, because he recognized something different about her when Brianna Walker came back into her life. He's seen them together in Charisma's home here and he's seen them at the Tagherty's with the entire family. While nothing inappropriate has happened at either location, Kent has identified a distinct difference in Charisma's attitude and behavior in the last few months... especially where Brianna is concerned. And he's also been made aware of just how integral to the entire Tagherty clan Brianna has been... for years." Esmeralda paused and took a deep breath.

"Now, put that together with the woman he's always known - the woman he agreed to marry and have a child with. The same woman who was at the Tagherty's for Christmas because she knew Brianna was essentially lost to her again. It doesn't take a genius to come up with the correct answer."

"So Charisma's life is falling down around her ears?"

"Basically yes. The moment Brianna Walker stepped back into her life, everything started unraveling for Charisma Tagherty. All that remains to be seen is if it's going to be too little, too late."

"I hate this job," Saphira muttered, though it was loud enough for everyone in the room to hear it.

Esmeralda gently squeezed her hand. "Sometimes we all do, love." She turned back to the waiting angels. "All right - everyone back to their posts for now. If and when things change again...."

"We'll just sit back and watch it happen," Saphira said with little inflection in her voice. She met Esmeralda's chiding eyes. "It's the truth and you know it. We're observers at this point. There's not much that you or anyone else can do to influence the way things go."

"Perhaps," Esmeralda conceded. "But that doesn't mean we can be lax in our vigilance. So keep your eyes peeled, ladies. Things should be moving fairly quickly from here on out."

"I guess that means I better get to bed," Ruby stated with a groan. "If we're still working here, I have to be up early to be at the diner tomorrow."

"Us too," Opal said, motioning between her and Indi. "Not for the diner, but the Senators are working through the weekend, so we are too. Everyone wants to greet the new session running apparently." She looked at Indi. "Are you going to be at the office or...?"

Indi shrugged. "We're starting out in the apartment. That's where we're meeting anyway. After that? I guess it depends on how work goes. You?"

"We'll be working from Charisma's house. We've done it enough that we've got it down to a science... even with Adam there. We won't go into the office in the Senate Building until Congress recommences after the weekend."

With that, the meeting broke up and goodnights were bidden as angels scattered to resume their duties... and in some cases, their beds. They all had a feeling they were going to need the rest to get through the upcoming days.

************

They worked for several straight days - just like they would in Senate office, but with the added benefit of casual clothes. Neither Charisma nor Brianna objected to their staff adopting a more informal mode of dress while working the last few days of the holiday. Brianna was as relaxed as she had ever been with her staff, but Indi could clearly see the shadows and shutters in green eyes that had once been clear and open. Still, Brianna was brisk and professional, so Indi had no opportunity to ask after her boss in more than a cursory manner.

Even Esmeralda was unsuccessful in prying much from the brief conversations she shared with Brianna. She was desperately hoping that a return to the office might also mean a return to more personal and friendly discussion. For now, Esmeralda counted her blessings that both of her friends had deemed staying in touch with her was a priority for them. At least she had contact with them on an almost daily basis, and in another few days, it would be daily as well as face-to-face.

Charisma, on the other hand, was at times short and at others longsuffering. Her staff didn't know from minute to minute which boss they might encounter. It made work difficult at best and Opal came home so exhausted, she simply fell into bed face first. Esmeralda recognized the signs and putting those with the brief conversations she was having with Charisma, let Opal sleep for a while before waking her for dinner and a short debriefing before tucking her back into bed.

By the time Sunday arrived, Esmeralda decided to give Opal the chance to sleep in a bit, and Amber, Mal and Jade stayed with Charisma and Kent to watch the drama unfold between them.

************

Charisma frowned when the doorbell rang. She hadn't opened the gates yet this morning because she wasn't expecting anyone but Kent this early. And of course, Kent had a key. Still, it was possible he'd forgotten it; hence she rose from her desk and walked into the foyer. She wasn't surprised to see him standing on the steps when she looked through the peephole and therefore had the alarm shut off before she'd hardly stopped walking.

She opened the door with a smile - which wavered when she realized Kent wasn't smiling back at her. She motioned him in with a question. "Kent? Is something wrong? Did you forget your key?"

"Yes," he replied calmly. "And no."

Charisma frowned. It was too damned early in the morning for riddles and games. She'd promised to give Kent the morning, but there was still work to be done before the day was done. She didn't want to start off being confused by vagueness.

"I'm sorry... yes and no what?"

"Yes, there is something wrong. I think there has been for a while. And no, I didn't forget my key."

"Then why were you knocking?"

Kent sighed. Leave it to Charisma to jump right into things before they even said hello to one another. "Can we go into the kitchen? This will probably take a few minutes, and I'd like a cup of coffee."

"Of course!" Charisma exclaimed, mentally thumping herself on the head. "Let me take your coat, and we'll get you squared away."

Kent handed over his overcoat, though he kept his sports coat on. Charisma shooed him towards the kitchen and he hesitated just long enough to see her head to her office to close the door before he disappeared across the threshold. She was only a minute behind him and she walked into the kitchen carrying a half-empty cup of coffee.

"Did you get your coffee?" frowning again when she realized he didn't have a cup in front of him.

"I thought I'd wait for you," Kent responded, though that was only a half-truth. Charisma nodded and pulled out his usual mug, and his smile was melancholy as he grasped she knew at least that much about him. She prepared his coffee and set it in front of him, then took a seat next to him at the table.

"So what's going on?" Charisma asked bluntly. "I know something is bothering you."

"Do you, Charisma? How can you be sure?" This time her frown was more of a glower as she tried to make sense of what Kent was implying. Coming up empty, she shook her head and Kent sighed. "You're right, Charisma - something is bothering me, and has been for a while. And since we're heading into a new year and all...."

"Kent, we've already started the New Year... several days ago."

"I'm well aware, Charisma," Kent replied wryly. "I was standing above Times' Square when the ball dropped. However, this was the first time this year that you and I could be in the same place together, so work with me here, all right?" with just a hint of exasperation. Charisma nodded, wondering at his vehemence. "Thank you," he muttered. "I wanted to give these to you myself personally," he added, pulling a sheaf of legal papers from the inside of his jacket. Charisma hesitated, then took them from him gingerly, as though gentle handling would change the contents of the documents themselves.

She opened them slowly and let her eyes read though them twice. When she looked up to meet his eyes, she found Kent looking at her - not with pity or hatred or anger but with love and respect and she felt her anger drain away leaving only confusion in its wake.

"Why?"

Kent cleared his throat, but held her gaze without flinching. "When we married, I knew you didn't love me like you could. But you did love me after a fashion and we were good together. And since we were friends and we both wanted a child, I didn't see any reason for us not to get married. It fit into your career goals and it made your mother happy, so what could be wrong with it, right? And I didn't mind because it gave me the opportunity to have a child and made my mother happy as well, with the added bonus that she stopped bugging me about needing a legal heir once Adam was born."

"What changed?"

"You did - or perhaps I should say that we didn't. We never became more than good friends - we've never really shared our lives... only our living space. The truth is that we've never been much more than roommates with occasional and very rare conjugal visits. You're still one of my very best friends, Charisma, and I still love you. But I'm not in love with you anymore than you're in love with me." Kent paused. "If I'd known the truth of your heart years ago when you asked me to marry you, I'd have never said yes. It's not fair to you; it's not fair to me; and it's not fair to her."

"Who?" Charisma asked in a hoarse voice, unable to meet his eyes now. Kent reached across the table and tilted Charisma's chin up until she met his eyes.

"I'm not stupid, Charisma - please don't insult my intelligence. Even a blind man can see that Brianna Walker is the person in your heart - still, I'd say, because if I was a betting man, I'd say she's been there for a long, long time."

"So why a separation?" Charisma asked, shaking the papers slightly. "Why not a divorce?"

"I want you to make the final decision - whether this is a trial separation that will see us together as a couple at the end of it or whether we will go our separate ways on a permanent basis. I want you to take this time and think about things, Charisma... about everything. If I'm wrong, then when this trial separation is over, we need to figure out how to become a real husband and wife... a real family. But if I'm right, I want you to use this time to be honest with everyone concerned - yourself, Brianna and me. The only thing I ask is that you don't restrict my access to Adam. He's the best part of us, and I don't want to miss any time with him that I can have."

"Of course not," Charisma agreed immediately. "You are and will always be his father." She took a deep breath but kept her eyes on the papers as she refolded them neatly. Then she met his eyes. "May I ask why you are so calm and rational about this?"

Kent chuckled, though it was tinged with a hint of sadness. "I've had a while to come to terms with this, Charisma. Besides, like I said - you're one of my best friends and the mother of my son. I'd like to see you happy. And I think Brianna Walker can do that."

"And will it make you happy, Kent? If we're no longer together?"

Kent hesitated, then nodded. "It will give me the chance to find a love like you have with her. Who knows? Maybe I'll get lucky too."

Charisma nodded and rose to refill her coffee cup. "Stay a little while. Ame will be back with Adam shortly, and he's anxious to see you. We'll be working in my office, so you can have the whole afternoon with him if you like."

"I'd like very much," Kent said. "Thank you, Charisma."

She whirled on him. "For what?"

"Understanding." She frowned at him, but nodded. Then they settled in to wait for Adam's return.



Chapter LXXVIII

"PA!!!" Adam squealed and the sound brought up the heads of everyone working in Charisma's study and a sorrowful smile to Charisma's face, though no one commented. Instead, after a brief moment, they returned to their work, and Charisma nodded her head in approval as she refocused herself. In another moment, there was a knock at the door of the study, and Kent and Adam poked their heads in gingerly. "Charisma?"

Again everyone glanced up, but this time it was so brief Charisma barely had time to notice before they had once more been occupied with other things. Charisma rose from her seat, and motioned them back out of her office. "Sorry," she offered. "We've got paper scattered everywhere. I'd really rather not...." motioning to Adam currently ensconced in his father's arms. Kent waved away her explanation.

"Don't worry about it, Charisma. That room has always been sacred - I know that. Listen, would you mind if Adam and I went over to the Mall for a bit? Maybe took in a museum?"

"Kent, he's your son too - you don't need my permission."

Kent shrugged. "Maybe. But I didn't want you to worry when it got quiet around here. We won't be too long. It's still pretty cold out and we don't want Adam catching a chill, do we Boy?" chuckling when Adam vigorously shook his head no. "I thought maybe I could bring pizza back for dinner before I headed off too?" his offer sounding more like a question than a statement.

Charisma nodded. "That would be fine but only get enough for the three of us. I'm going to let these guys go home in a little while."

"Okay - I'll call you before we head back. You can call the pizza order in."

Charisma smirked. "I should have known there'd be a catch. All right - you let me know and I'll make the call." Without another word, she turned and re-entered her study and Kent and Adam got dressed to spend some time in the frigid outdoors.

************

Brianna was sitting on a bench outside the National Gallery when she heard the voice, and she dropped her head and took a deep breath to prepare herself for what was coming. She was more than a little surprised when she looked up and met Kent Rockwell's eyes briefly before finding herself with an armful of Adam Rockwell as he shouted her name.

"BR'ANNA!!" patting her face gently. "Love Br'anna... Br'anna good."

"Hey, Little Man," she greeted with a sad smile, glad for the wind that was blowing. She could blame the tears stinging her eyes on that. Adam cradled her face in his hands and rubbed their noses together even as he laughed aloud.

"Love Br'anna," he said again, then snuggled up under her chin. Brianna kissed the top of his head.

"Love you too, Little Man." She turned her attention to Kent, who stood by with his hands shoved in his pockets, rocking on his heels awkwardly. She nodded to the empty space on the bench beside her even as he spoke.

"May I join you?"

"Please," Brianna responded immediately, waiting until he was settled before speaking again. "This was quite a surprise. I didn't expect to see anyone out here today."

Kent snickered. "There are always tourists... except in the very rare event when the museums are closed. I have to admit that I was equally stunned to see you here. I thought everyone was working today in preparation for the new session."

"I worked most of the last four days - that's enough."

Kent held up his hands in surrender. "No argument from me. I just know how most of the people in your position tend to work. There are only two speeds - really fast and not at all." He snorted. "Most of them wouldn't be caught dead going to the Smithsonian - even if it wasn't the dead of winter."

"I'm not remotely like most of the people who work in this business," with a wry smile. "Remember, this is a temporary assignment for me. I'm not making plans to do this long-term."

"That's true," Kent conceded, marveling at her stage presence. He *knew* she was uncomfortable with him and yet, aside from a bit of stiffness that could be marked down to the fact that Adam was wrapped around her like an octopus, he never would have guessed from her demeanor. Before he could pursue his line of thinking, however, Brianna's voice broke into his thoughts.

"So what brings you boys out to the Mall on this bright, blustery winter's day?"

"The dinosaurs," nodding his head in the direction of the Natural History Museum. "You?"

"The sculpture of Diana. I find it inspiring."

"So you were out here instead of in there because...?"

"It was a little warm in the Gallery," Brianna admitted after a moment's hesitation. "The heat is turned up because it's so cold out here. But when you're dressed for the weather out here, it doesn't take long to become overheated in there."

Kent nodded seriously. "I can see how that could quickly become something of an issue. Just don't catch a chill sitting out here too long. That would be the same problem in reverse." He drew a deep breath. "Speaking of... I'd better get us indoors. I don't want Adam getting sick out here."

"There's just one problem," Brianna responded softly. Kent cocked his head and waited. "He's asleep."

"Oh. Oh dear. I didn't... I'm so sorry."

"Why?" Brianna asked with a hint of amusement in her tone. "He was tired. Obviously you've already had a busy day together. I'm flattered he feels comfortable enough with me to fall asleep when I'm holding him."

"You must have a special kind of magic," Kent commented with a smile. "He really doesn't trust very many to do that on," not mentioning his own difficulties right after Adam's birth. He rose and turned to Brianna, tilting his head trying to figure out the best way to take his son out of her arms without being inappropriate. Brianna returned his look and held up a finger.

Without much effort, she stood and waited for Kent to extend his arms. She deposited Adam gently into the cradle Kent formed for him, then leaned forward and kissed Adam's cheek. Adam sighed and cuddled deeper into his father's embrace. Brianna gave Kent a lopsided smile.

"You may want to rethink that visit to the museum," she suggested with a twinkle. "Not sure how much he'd get out of it in his current condition."

Kent chuckled. "You could be right. It was nice seeing you again, Brianna."

"You too, Kent. Take care," she said as she turned and walked away without a backwards glance.

************

"Thank you for coming, Turq," Kent said as she settled in behind the wheel of the big car. She met his eyes in the rearview mirror.

"It's not a problem, Mr. Rockwell."

"Just for the record, I normally don't do this. But I wasn't sure how I was going to get home on the Metro carrying Adam *and* pizza."

"I know, sir. It's really not a problem. Would you like me to fetch the pizza or watch Adam for you?"

He glanced down at Adam who was still sleeping with his head in Kent's lap, then jerked his head at the pizza joint. "Would you mind?"

"Not at all, sir," accepting the money he passed her. "Be right back."

True to her word, it only took a few minutes and she was back asking for more money. "I'm sorry, sir. Evidently the Senator ordered more than one because of your unexpectedly early return." Kent simply nodded and handed over a wad of bills. In short order, they were headed back to Charisma's house with the pizzas in hand.

Charisma had the gate opened waiting on them, and Turq pulled into the driveway without hesitation. When she reached the portico, she pulled up to the door before shutting the car off. Then she raced around to open the door for Kent who had scooped Adam into his arms once more. Before Turq could ask Kent for his keys to unlock the door for him, Charisma pulled the door open wide and motioned him in.

"Kent? Is everything all right?

"Br'anna?" Adam murmured. Charisma met Kent's eyes with a cross between fear and consternation in her own. She turned her attention to Turq, who had grabbed the stack of pizza boxes from the car.

"Let's get those into the kitchen," Charisma instructed. Kent took Adam and walked upstairs; Turq just nodded and followed Charisma, placing them on the table before stepping back.

"Will there be anything else, Senator?"

"Would you like to stay and share lunch with us Turq?"

"Oh no ma'am... thank you. I had already eaten by the time Mr. Rockwell called."

"Well, thank you for picking him and my son up. I know you're supposed to be off today."

"It wasn't a problem ma'am... really. I'll pick you up at the regular time tomorrow?" Charisma nodded. "See you in the morning then, Senator."

"Thank you Turq - drive safely."

Turq touched her fingertips to her hair in salute and fled back down the steps to the warmth of the big car. In another moment, she and it were disappearing down the drive and out the gates. Charisma's shiver brought her back to an awareness of her surroundings, and she shut the door and remotely closed the gates. Then she went to retrieve her staff from her office.

************

They were almost done with their impromptu lunch when Adam wandered downstairs rubbing his eyes. Kent, being closest to the door and only peripherally involved in the conversation, heard him first. He stood without ceremony and moved into the hallway to pick Adam up. Adam wrapped his arms around Kent's neck and held on tightly. Kent hugged him back and kissed his head, then headed back into the kitchen.

"You want some pizza, Boy?" Kent asked as they crossed the threshold, only just noticing Adam tightening his grip even as he looked around the room.

"There's Mama's big boy," Charisma smiled even as she signaled to her staff to leave the room. They took the hint, being long schooled in reading Charisma's nonverbal cues, and in less than a minute of Adam's arrival, the kitchen was cleared of everyone but him and his parental units.

Adam reached for Charisma and she took him as a matter of course when Kent released him. Then Kent went to pour Adam some milk while Charisma put a slice of pizza on a plate and set it in front of him. Adam grabbed the slice in both hands and lifted it to his mouth. When he had a mouthful, he looked at Charisma.

"Mammma, 'ere's Bana?"

She frowned as she tried to filter out the food in his speech, even as she chided, "Don't talk with your mouth full, son."

He glowered and spit out the half-chewed bite of pizza, then poked out his lip. "Where's Br'anna?" he asked again before shoving the bite back into his mouth. Charisma and Kent made grossed out faces at one another, then turned back to Adam when he screeched, "MAMA!"

"Adam Rockwell!! That's enough from you... now settle down," biting her lip when he teared up at her severe tone. Charisma took a deep breath and softened her voice. "We don't act that way at the table, son. Now I don't know where Brianna is; I haven't seen her."

"Adam saw. And Pa."

"Well that at least explains why he's asking about her," Charisma muttered to herself, though Kent heard her words clearly. She took a deep breath and looked at him. "Should I even ask?"

"It was all perfectly innocent, Charisma. We were walking down the Mall towards the Natural History Museum when Adam spotted her sitting on a bench outside the National Gallery. He took off like a shot." Kent frowned. "We may have to reconsider that whole leash idea - honestly, Charisma... he was gone before I realized what had happened."

"Have you noticed it mostly happens when Brianna is around - specifically when he is trying to get to her?"

"BR'ANNA!!" Adam yelled with a giggle, continuing to stuff pizza into his mouth. Charisma pinched her nose between her thumb and forefinger to avoid looking at his chipmunk-cheeked face. Kent just shook his head and tried to wipe Adam's face while the child squirmed to get away from him.

"I can't say that I have, although now that you mention it...." He let his voice trail off as his mind traced back the times he'd seen Adam run away from him or Charisma in recent days. "I think you're right," he agreed. "I wonder what is so fascinating about her to him."

"Love Br'anna," Adam stated with an emphatic nod of her head. "Br'anna good."

Kent and Charisma exchanged a look. "Well... I guess that explains that." Kent sighed. "I know she's got some kind of powerful magic - he climbed right up into her lap and fell asleep. It's why we ended up back here so early. After discussing mundane things like the museums and the weather, Brianna pointed out that a visit to see the dinosaurs would have been a wasted effort while he was asleep."

"That was the extent of your conversation?"

"Pretty much. She must've been an actor in another life, though."

"What makes you say that?"

"Because I know she's uneasy around me, but I don't think anyone else would be able to pick it up from her actions or her attitude." A beat. "I don't think *I* would be able to tell if I didn't already know."

"Well, she did double major in theatre and the law." Kent's eyebrows went into his hairline and he whistled low in his throat at Charisma's words.

"That would explain a lot. I'd like to hear about it some day. I'd like to hear about a lot of things, actually. Maybe one day we can sit down and talk about some of the things we've missed in each other's lives along the way. In the meantime," he continued before she could formulate a response, "I'll take Adam upstairs and get him cleaned up so you can get back to work."

Charisma sighed. "Thanks. You wouldn't believe the work I should really get done before going back to work tomorrow."

"Yes I would. I've seen this every time you get ready to start a new session."

"Yes, I guess you have," Charisma chuckled. "But I'm about done for the day. Everything else can wait until tomorrow at this point. What time is your train back?"

"Not til late. I wasn't sure how the day was going to turn out, so I gave myself plenty of time to cover all kinds of possibilities."

"Would you... you're welcome to stay in your room."

"No," came the whip shot answer. "Not that I don't appreciate the offer, but we're not going to fall into old patterns if we're going to do this right. I would like to try and spend more time with Adam, but I'm not going to share living space with you when we're separated. It just wouldn't be right."

"If you think it's best...."

"Charisma, I know it is, and so do you. Everything is going to be pretty much like it has been, except that I will be living in Manhattan and visiting DC occasionally, and not the other way around. Oh... that reminds me - I need to get some movers in here to pack up and move the rest of my stuff from upstairs. So if I could keep my key until that's done...?"

"Absolutely. Just let me know when and I'll make sure to be out of your way that day."

"PA!" Adam hollered, breaking the tableau and making them both jump at his volume level. Charisma cleared her throat and rose.

"Just leave everything. I'll take care of it when I'm done working."

"Adam and I'll go get cleaned up, then we'll be in the family room playing... I dunno - something I'm sure he will kick my a... butt at."

With that, Kent picked Adam up out of his chair and held him at arms' length as he made is way back upstairs. Charisma followed them out.

"You may want to lock the bathroom door. Remember he's something of an exhibitionist given half a chance."

Kent snorted. "Good idea," turning into Adam's bathroom. "We'll be out in a few," closing the door firmly behind them. Charisma waited until she heard the snick of the lock, then she smirked and headed back into her office. It was time to wrap things up for the day.



Chapter LXXIX

It had taken longer than she anticipated for Charisma to get all the loose ends taken care of before she was able to send her staff home for the rest of the day. So it was mid-afternoon by the time she was able to lock her study and go into the family room where her son was currently playing some game while Kent sat beside him pointing out various parts that might be helpful. Charisma stood in the doorway just watching them until Kent caught her profile out of the corner of his eye. He leaned down and whispered something to Adam. Adam dropped the controller and ran pell-mell towards Charisma. She leaned down and scooped him into her arms.

"Look Mama! I winning!" pointing to the television.

"I see that," Charisma chuckled. "Good job son!"

"Mama's big boy."

"You sure are." She set him down and he ran back to take his spot in front of the big screen. Kent got to his feet slowly and moved to sit in one of the recliners with a barely contained groan. Charisma smirked. "You sound like you're getting old."

Kent snorted. "There's no 'getting' to it. I'm already there and I should know better than to get down on the floor like that. I have to get back up and that gets harder everyday," shaking his head in disgust. Charisma laughed lightly, though she didn't make any effort to dispute his claim. Instead, she took a seat in the other recliner, and they sat silently watching Adam play his video game - a silence only broken by Adam himself once in a while when he got excited enough to cheer or point things out to them.

This lasted for a few minutes, before Adam's attention shifted to one of his favorite storybooks. Then Kent turned and tapped Charisma on the hand as the silence lengthened and started to become awkward. She started with the touch, then faced him with an eyebrow arched in question.

"I was just thinking," he said without preamble. "When was the last time we just sat together like this? Was it the Christmas after Adam was born?"

Charisma bit her lip and scrunched her forehead in thought. "I think it might have been. We've always been busy, on-the-go people. We've never slowed down for much."

Kent nodded his head in acknowledgement of the truth of her words. Even when they had been dating, very little time had been devoted to just being. When they'd gone out, it was to be seen together and that had lasted until Adam had been born. After that event they'd rarely gone out together in an effort to keep Adam's face out of the press. He glanced to see that their son was completely preoccupied with his book, then lowered his voice and spoke.

"Do you think we'd still be together if Adam hadn't been born?"

"Do you?" Charisma responded instantly. "You're the one that filed for the separation, Kent, so you tell me."

He held her eyes and slowly shrugged his shoulders after a moment's consideration. "I think probably we would, since one of our major reasons for getting married was to produce a child." He paused. "I don't think we'd be any better of a couple though - so probably no happier under the circumstances."

"That's the second time you've mentioned happiness as being a reason for this separation. Are you that unhappy, Kent?"

"I don't think I'm unhappy at all," he replied honestly. "But I'm not happy either. I am...." He hesitated while he searched for the right word. "I'm content - I think we both are. But I'd like to be happy, and I'd like to see you happy too." Charisma nodded slowly. "Not to change the subject," he continued before she could speak, "but why are you still here anyway?" looking pointedly at his watch.

Her eyebrows flew into her hairline and Charisma gave him and incredulous look. "Excuse me?? I *live* here, Kent. This is my home - where else would I be?"

Kent snorted. "Yeah... that didn't come out right. What I meant was - isn't there some sort of party or cocktail hour or dinner you should be attending this evening? There usually is a social mixer you attend this time of day - especially with Congress reconvening tomorrow."

"There are several, actually - two cocktail parties, a dinner party and at least one gathering for after-dinner drinks."

"Okay," Kent finally said when he realized she wasn't going to add anything else. "So you're not going out because...?"

"I didn't make plans to go to any of them. I wasn't sure when I'd be back in town, and I wasn't going to rush my visit with my family. I see them so little as it is." Then she noticed the sad expression in Kent's eyes. "What is it?" she asked, tilting her head.

"We've never done that," Kent replied, taking as much blame as he was placing. "We've never made any kind of extra effort to spend time with one another. That should have clued me in to reality long before Brianna Walker stepped back into your sphere. I guess it was too easy to ignore it just to maintain the status quo."

"So I should blame her for all this?" motioning around the room vaguely, a hint of heat in her tone.

"NO." Kent's answer was firm and vehement. "WE are to blame for what has transpired between us... for better or for worse. Her reappearance was just the catalyst I needed to face the truth of what we are... what we have always been - friends... co-parents... roommates. I want more, Charisma! I want the brass ring - I want everything! Don't you??"

"Mama?" Adam queried from the floor, looking at her with a frown. Charisma opened her arms and he ran into them, cuddling into her just like he'd done earlier with Brianna. Kent sighed. He felt he'd been on the verge of a breakthrough with her, but of course Adam's needs came first. Kent reached for Adam, and Charisma tightened her grip for a moment before reluctantly releasing Adam to his father.

"C'mon, Boy. Pa's gotta go catch the train so I can get back to work. You can walk me to the door, okay?"

"Mama come too?"

"Yeah, Mama can come too," holding out his hand to Charisma and helping her rise from her seat before letting go. Then they headed out of the family room towards the front door. Kent hugged Adam and savored the joy of being hugged back. Then Adam cradled his face and leaned their foreheads together, laughing aloud when Kent crossed his eyes.

"You sure you don't want to stay a little longer?" Charisma invited as she witnessed their interaction. Despite everything, and no matter what happened between them from here on out, she was glad she and Kent had shared enough of their lives together to have been blessed with Adam. She had a feeling he might be their saving grace. "I thought you didn't have to go back until late tonight."

Kent smiled and gave Adam a kiss that he returned wholeheartedly. Then Kent leaned him in Charisma's direction, and Adam shifted into her arms without hesitation.

"I'm sure. We'll set up some kind of schedule for me to visit soon, but I think it's time for me to go for tonight. You've got a lot of things to think about and consider and work starts up again full steam for you tomorrow. Besides, by the time I get to the station and get squared away, it should be about time for my train to leave. Call me if you need me, all right?"

"I will," though they both knew something drastic would have to happen to Adam before Charisma would make that particular call. "And I'll let you know," gesturing in the direction of the study where the separation papers were safely tucked away.

"Take your time and think about it, Charisma. I want you to make the right decision... for everyone involved."

She nodded but didn't answer him verbally. Instead she held the door when he opened it, then whispered in Adam's ear. Adam waved goodbye frantically. "Bye Pa!!" his enthusiasm bringing a smile to both adult countenances.

"Bye Boy... be a good boy for Mama, all right? I'll be back again before you know it."

"Love Pa!" This time the words brought tears to Kent's eyes, but he smiled and traded glances with Charisma.

"Love you too, Boy." Then he was out the door and back in the rental car. Charisma opened the gate for him, and waited for his taillights to disappear out of the drive before she closed it and locked up the house for the night. There was much to consider, but as Kent had pointed out, they had time. And tonight she planned to spend that time with her son. She could worry about the future tomorrow.

************

The knock on the door brought Charisma's head up with a jerk. The first day back at work after the extended holiday was always something of a strain, and this year it was compounded by a number of other factors all pressing into her consciousness for consideration. Still, she and her staff had been kept remarkably busy taking care of the business of the Senate; even now she was engrossed in reading the amendments to several bills that had been presented in chambers that day. So the sound of a knock on her door this late in the evening startled her out of the bubble she'd encapsulated herself in.

"Come in?" blinking rapidly as she tried to orient her vision to the lights that were suddenly flipped on, then smiling in genuine welcome when Esmeralda stuck her head in the door. "ES!!" she exclaimed, rising from her seat and moving around the desk to give Esmeralda a hug. Though they'd spoken on the phone regularly during the holidays, nothing was quite as reassuring as seeing one another face-to-face. Charisma gently grasped Esmeralda's arms when the hug was over, and checked her over carefully from head to toe and back again. When she met Esmeralda's eyes, she grinned in response to the one she was getting. "You look wonderful," Charisma offered. "I guess your time off was exactly what you needed. How do you feel?"

Esmeralda smiled. "I feel really good... like a new woman almost. Maybe whatever was hanging on before is finally gone."

"We'll hope so," Charisma added fervently. "It stayed around long past its welcome. And how is Saphira?"

Now Esmeralda's smile became radiant and her eyes glowed with an almost heavenly light. "She's amazing, as always. Even though she was working hard during most of the holiday season, there's a joy to her now... a peace I haven't seen in her for a very long time."

"A lot of that has to do with you feeling better, I'll bet."

Esmeralda chuckled. "No bet from me. Pretty sure I watched that particular burden slide from her shoulders a little more each day as I've gotten noticeably better." She turned to her cart and began gathering her supplies. "And how are things with you?"

"Kent filed for separation."

The statement was so calm and matter-of-fact that Esmeralda had to reign in the impulse to whirl around. Instead, she finished collecting the things she needed and setting them out in the order they would be used, before clutching her duster and turning to face Charisma. "Okay, then," she offered slowly. "And how do you feel about it?"

Charisma walked around her desk and resumed her seat, propping her elbow on the chair arm and her chin on her fingers as she studied Esmeralda thoughtfully. Esmeralda remained quiet, continuing her work around the office while Charisma pondered the question.

"You know something? I don't think I do... feel anything about it, I mean. I'm mostly ambivalent about the whole thing at this point. I thought about getting angry, but why? Kent made some good points, and as unsettling for me as this is, I'd like him to find happiness. He's a good man and a good father - he deserves to be happy."

"And you?"

Charisma shook her head and though tears flooded her eyes, she refused to let them fall. She took a cleansing breath before she spoke. "I missed my chance for happiness... both times it was offered to me. I don't think there'll be a third opportunity."

"And if there was?"

"I'd grab it with both hands and never let go."

"Just remember you said that, Charisma."

Charisma snorted. "Your faith is far greater than mine, my friend."

"Perhaps. But being optimistic can't hurt, right?"

"I love you, Es. Don't you ever go changing. Oh... before I forget, let's plan to get together again soon. I think Adam misses you both. I know I do."

"You give us a time and place and we'll be there."

"Not this weekend, because Kent is coming back to town so we can work out a schedule for him to visit Adam. He wants to take him to the Natural History Museum. How about the following weekend?"

"As far as I know, we're free. I'll talk to Saphira and let you know tomorrow, all right?"

"Sounds good," Charisma agreed. "Let me get out of your hair so you can get done and go meet her. I'm sure she's anxiously waiting to hear how your first day back was."

Esmeralda laughed. "Actually, she's less anxious now than she was when I returned a few months ago. She can see the difference in my health. But I imagine she is a little less than patient in her waiting. Poor Matilda."

Charisma smiled. "I don't know - I think Matilda probably has a pretty good handle on things."

Esmeralda smirked. "You're probably right." She continued working as Charisma shut down her computer and gathered up the stacks of paper the day's session had earned her. Charisma made a quick call, then picked up her briefcase.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Es?"

"I should be here," she commented with a smile. "Have a good night, Senator."

Charisma stuck out her tongue at the formal address. "You too." She left the office and Esmeralda finished up her work in short order. Then she moved down the hall to Brianna's office. It was completely dark, and Esmeralda moved swiftly through the outer office in the hope that Brianna was simply waiting in the dark for her arrival. When her knock wasn't answered, however, she figured that she was wishing in vain - a fact that was confirmed when she opened the door to an empty office.

Esmeralda turned on the lights and looked around slowly. Everything was in place, except.... Esmeralda frowned. The pictures had been rearranged slightly, as though Brianna was making room for a new set. Esmeralda nodded to herself - Opal had mentioned there should be new pictures from Brianna's trip to Dubai. Otherwise, everything seemed pretty much the same.

She got out the tools of her trade and slowly made her way around the room, straightening as she dusted. It was only when she got to Brianna's desk that she realized what was different.

Aside from the note that rested prominently in the middle of the otherwise empty blotter, the Waterford frame that held the picture of Brianna and Charisma at the Trevi Fountain was gone. Esmeralda found it interesting that she hadn't replaced the picture with something else - instead, Brianna had simply removed the entire memory.

She wondered if Brianna had simply removed it from public view and tucked it into one of the desk drawers. She made a mental note to ask Indi and Coral when she saw them, because she was unwilling to risk the trust and friendship she had established with Brianna to rummage through her desk.

Esmeralda turned her attention to the sheet of paper that had her name across the top in big, bold letters. Obviously, Brianna was eager to make sure Esmeralda found the note. Esmeralda tilted her head and picked the letter up to read it, then smiled.

Esmeralda, (it read)

I'm not here - clearly - but not because I am trying to avoid you. I missed lunch today and decided I needed a piece of Matilda's chocolate cake to fill the gaping chasm my empty belly has become in the intervening hours since dinner last night. And before you start scolding... yes, I will actually have some dinner to go with my dessert. Do you really think Matilda - or Saphira for that matter - would let me get away with anything else? Honestly, sometimes it's like having another Okasa or two in my life - not that that's a bad thing. For a kid who grew up with no real parental interest, having so many at this point in my life is something I consider a blessing... mostly.

I did try holding out until you arrived, but when I felt my blood sugar drop unexpectedly, I decided it would be in my best interest to go ahead and call the day done... especially since I know you'll go straight to the diner when you're done here.

Anyway, I'll be at Angel's when you get there. I have some great new pictures to share with you and Saphira.

B.


Esmeralda chuckled and tucked the note into her pocket. Then she resumed her work, ready to get to the diner.

************

When the bell jingled, Saphira looked at the door as a matter of course... only to rush to Brianna's side when she recognized her face and saw the pallor lurking beneath the new tan she sported. Without a word she led Brianna to a place at the counter and immediately poured her a glass of milk.

"Drink," she instructed, and Brianna did so with alacrity, sighing when the cold milk hit her empty stomach. Then she winced and clutched her head.

"Brain freeze," she mumbled, waiting for it to pass before raising the glass to her lips again and finishing off her milk. Then she sighed in satisfaction again and smiled at Saphira. "That hit the spot. Thank you."

"Good... so what can I get you to eat?"

Brianna frowned. "How did you know?"

"You've got that same hungry look in your eye as you had the night you stumbled in here lost." Brianna narrowed her eyes and Saphira chuckled and held up her hands. "I'm a waitress, Brianna. I know what hungry looks like."

"Smartass," Brianna grumbled, but gave Saphira a smile. "I'll have the special.... wait," she qualified, looking around the small restaurant. "It's not liver and onions is it? I hate liver and onions."

Saphira wrinkled up her nose in disgust. "EW... doesn't everyone?? No, it's not liver and onions - I don't think that's been on the menu since I started working here. Tonight's meatloaf."

Brianna smiled and nodded. "I like meatloaf. I'll have the special and a BIG slice of Matilda's chocolate cake."

"And to drink?"

"I'll stick with milk."

Saphira nodded and slid the order to Joe, then refilled Brianna's glass. "Won't be but a couple minutes," she promised. "And in the meantime, you can tell me why you're really here. I figured you'd wait to see Es tonight."

"That was the original plan, but sometimes plans change," Brianna offered with a sad smile. "Besides, I thought I'd share my latest pictures with both of you together. That way, I don't have to bore Es twice."

Saphira laughed. "Fair enough," turning to grab Brianna's plate as Joe passed it to her. She set it in front of Brianna with the admonishment, "You get started, and I'll be back." Then she moved to check on her other customers, willing Esmeralda to hurry with her work and get to the diner.



Chapter LXXX

"So Dubai was a good choice, then?" Esmeralda asked as she accepted another glass of milk from Saphira. She covered Saphira's hand with her own and squeezed lightly; Saphira lifted their clasped hands to her lips and brushed Esmeralda's knuckles with a kiss. All this was done unconsciously as far as Brianna could tell - they never broke eye contact with her. She cleared her throat to remove any trace of tears from her voice.

"It was a fantastic choice," she enthused. "I don't know what made Indi choose it, but it was fabulous. I tried to bring my masseuse Ramon back with me, but his wife strenuously objected... mostly because she couldn't get away to come with him," Brianna added with a little laugh. Esmeralda and Saphira both chuckled. "I figured he could make a mint with all the tension in this town."

"The town would probably fall apart without it," Saphira mumbled, then yelped when Esmeralda pinched her. "Whaaaaaat?" she added in a whine. "I'm just saying."

"Yes, well *don't* just saying. It would be nice if the world could live without stress and tension for a week - maybe they'd figure out how to play nicer together."

"It's a nice dream, Es, but I don't think real life works that way," Brianna said. "But it's so good to see you're feeling better. You really had us worried there for a while. Guess you just needed some extended rest, huh?"

"I guess," Esmeralda agreed slowly. "Personally, I was beginning to think it might take a miracle, so if that's not what this is, then He provided grace in His own way and His own time."

"I'm glad your faith proved out, my friend. Even though you've been in my life just a short time, you'd have left a big hole if something had happened to you. And what would that have done to Saphira?" seeing the blood drain from both faces. Before she could say anything to make things better, however, Matilda came in from the back, cheering enthusiastically.

"Oh, Esmeralda... when Joe called, I wanted to rush right over. But I was helping my grandson make cookies to take to his school tomorrow - it's his birthday, you know. Stand up... let me look at you," Matilda commanded without missing a beat, spinning Esmeralda around slowly, then circling her again while she studied her up and down. "Look at me - how are you feeling? And don't lie to me - I'll know."

"I feel good, Matilda. Better than I have in a long time."

"So the rest did you good then?"

"The rest did me great, Matilda. I feel made over."

"You look it too. And you," turning her attention to Brianna, "where did the tan come from in the middle of all this cold and snow?"

"The beach," Brianna replied with a teasing smirk. "There are these really cool inventions called airplanes - they'll take you away from the cold and snow and into the warmth of the sun. They'll also bring you back to the cold and snow, but I'm working on changing that."

Matilda laughed. "You, young missy, are nothing but a genuine troublemaker. Now," looking around at the three younger women, "have you three had dinner?" Seeing everyone nod she smiled. "Good - then it's time for all of you to get on home and get to bed... you especially," pointing a finger in Esmeralda's direction. "It's only Monday, and you've got the rest of the week to go before you get another day off. So let's go...." shooing them in the direction of the door. "There's always tomorrow if you want to continue your conversation."

They couldn't really argue - the diner was closed and had been for a while. And no one, including Esmeralda wanted to see her health fail again. So they slowly donned their cold weather clothing and walked towards the door. Matilda took Esmeralda aside for a moment, and Brianna and Saphira moved ahead to give them privacy. Brianna held out a folded bill to Saphira who recoiled sharply from it. Brianna calmly intercepted her hand and curled the money into her palm.

"Saphira, I know we're friends, and I appreciate that facet of my life more than you could possibly understand right now. But I also know that a majority of your income is derived from the tips you make working in this diner as a waitress. Please don't turn down money you've earned because of your pride - if Es is right and He is watching, I don't want there to be a mark against either of us because of something like this."

Saphira frowned. "Why would there be a mark against you? It's my pride."

"And isn't there a Bible verse somewhere that compels us to not be beholden to anyone... to pay our debts? You took care of me again, Saphira - let me make some sort of contribution towards the time and effort that took. The friendship part I can only repay with my own."

Saphira took a deep breath. "That was very sneaky and underhanded," she commented with a wry grin. "We are happy to have your friendship, Brianna - your acceptance of us means so much. As for the money... well, I certainly wouldn't want to be responsible for a black mark on your record, so I will just say thank you and add it to the jar that is going towards paying off Esmeralda's medical bills."

"Are there many?"

"Many what?" Esmeralda asked as she joined them in the doorway. They waved goodbye to Matilda and walked out of the diner together. Brianna had dismissed her car, so they all headed towards the closest Metro station. Esmeralda and Saphira silently agreed to see Brianna home before they went to their own.

"Cousins," Brianna said without missing a beat. "You've mentioned large families, but no siblings."

Esmeralda blinked. She didn't really think they had been discussing their families, but it was a legitimate question. If something else was going on, Saphira would share the details with her when they got home. She cleared her throat.

"Oh... well, yes - there are quite a few actually, although Saphira does have a sister."

"Oh that's right - I had forgotten." She closed her eyes in thought. "Amber, wasn't it?"

Saphira wrinkled her nose. "That'd be her," gently guiding the two smaller women towards the correct platform. Brianna stopped walking and looked at them in bemusement when she realized they were accompanying her instead of going to their own train.

"You know, guys... I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself."

Saphira just held her eyes. "You remember those marks we were talking about earlier? Do you know how big and black the one I'd get would be if we let you go wandering around down here by yourself when it would only take a few minutes of our time to see you safely home??"

"That was very sneaky and underhanded," Brianna commented with a wry grin.

Saphira chuckled. "I know - I learned from the best," sketching a half-bow in Brianna's direction.

"So the two of you are going to share with me exactly what I am missing here, right?" Esmeralda growled....

... only to suck in a breath when a stranger seemed to deliberately run into Brianna. He knocked her off-balance and it was only Esmeralda's swift action in reaching out that kept Brianna from hitting the concrete face first. That was about all he had time to do as Esmeralda's gasp had spurred Saphira to action. Before he could open his mouth to say a word, he was face down on the ground with his arms wrenched so far up his back he couldn't whimper without causing himself excruciating pain. Brianna immediately found a law enforcement officer, and then the real circus began.

************

It was closer to daylight than dark when Esmeralda and Saphira dragged themselves into the house... to be met by every member of their household except for those on duty. They looked at each other and then at the rest, before Esmeralda turned her attention to Ruby.

"Ruby?? Is everything okay?"

Ruby blew out an unsteady breath. "That was going to be our question - are you two all right? Coral gave us a quick rundown, but...."

"She did? When?"

"Just a little while ago - probably right before you left the police station because it was right after Brianna called Jas to come pick you all up from there. I'm still not completely clear on what happened tonight... only that there was some kind of trouble."

"Were you up all night?"

"I started to be," Ruby answered honestly. "When you were late, I considered staying up to wait for you. Then I realized that if something was wrong and you weren't late taking care of Angel business, I could do more good if I got some sleep last night and covered for Saphira today. Don't even," she added fiercely with a look in Saphira's direction. Saphira held up her hands in surrender and Ruby knew whatever had happened, it had been hellacious for Saphira to capitulate so easily. She turned back to Esmeralda with concerned eyes. "So?"

"So, it should already be on the news and in the early edition of the paper. Some punk kid tried to mug Brianna - Saphira put a stop to it."

"Then why does she look like she just ran a marathon in her mortal body carrying a sack of gold bars in each hand?" Opal asked, ignoring the glare she got from Saphira.

"Because the rescue was easy. The paperwork, on the other hand...."

"Hell is not fire and brimstone," Saphira growled, drawing surprised looks from all the Angels who had indeed witnessed the fire and brimstone of Hell. They waited for her to continue. "It's drowning in government paperwork that has to be filled out in triplicate." She looked at Esmeralda. "I'm glad I didn't go with my first instinct and kill that idiot. I'd *still* be doing the paperwork to get out of that place while I suffocated under the weight of it."

The rest laughed at her description and Saphira stuck out her tongue. Esmeralda looked around at them with tired eyes. "Brianna is safe - she refused to stay here saying we needed to sleep and she needed to get ready for work."

Indi snorted. "Is she crazy??"

"We prefer to think of her as dedicated, no matter how nuts we consider her to be at the moment. However, she is going to work for at least part of the day today, so you all will need to be there as well. If you will excuse Saphira and me, we're going to bed as well. I'd hate to undo all that recuperation with one night of excitement, and I'm really tired. I don't need to tell you to keep your eyes peeled and your ears open."

Everyone shook their heads and waited for Esmeralda and Saphira to enter their room and close the door behind them before they stirred... ready to start another day.

************

"Senator? Senator Walker has entered the building." Opal's voice was calm as it came over the speakerphone in Charisma's office. Charisma jerked her head in the direction of her desk and scowled.

"Are you certain, Opal?" Surely Brianna had needed to sleep after the night she'd had.

"Yes ma'am," Opal replied without hesitation. "Turq just called me and said her car had just pulled up. Apparently Senator Walker's driver called ahead and asked for some help to get through the press presence that's gathered around outside."

Charisma closed her eyes and breathed deeply to will herself to calmness. When she had heard the news that morning, Charisma's first instinct had been to rush over to Brianna's to check on her personally. Then she realized that she had lost the right to be so familiar, and she determined to wait until Brianna contacted her. She decided this was close enough to contact for her to show a concerned interest without being accused of hawking over or mothering. God knew the last impression Charisma wanted to make was that of a mother.

Not that she hadn't had her staff do some checking - Charisma knew more than any of the news agencies did at this point... and probably almost as much as the parties involved in the incident did. But it didn't lessen her need to assure herself that her friends were all right. The only reason she hadn't called yet was that she fully expected them all to be sleeping soundly. She wondered what had caused Brianna to choose to come to work instead of getting a little rest. Then she shook her head - that wasn't as important as the fact that she was here and Charisma could now go see how she was doing personally.

"Thank you, Opal," Charisma said and she stood and straightened her clothing. She took a deep breath and walked to the door, opening it with confidence before passing through her outer office without a word. The staff exchanged glances, then simply got on with their day's work. If and when Charisma Tagherty needed their input, they'd be the first to know - until then, they would do their assigned tasks and be thankful for the respite from a moody boss.

Charisma paused outside the door, hearing the cacophony of noise that indicated Brianna and her entourage were headed towards her. So Charisma determined to wait for their arrival.

She watched as Brianna came up the hallway. It was obvious - to her at least - that Brianna was running on adrenaline and sheer grit, and part of her admired Brianna for that. It reminded her greatly of their college days, when they'd been able to stay up for thirty-six or forty-eight hours straight... especially around exam time. On the other hand, Charisma felt more than a twinge of anger at Brianna's lackadaisical attitude towards herself. It took her the intervening time of Brianna's closing the distance between them for her to swallow that feeling and put on a calm façade.

"Brianna?" she asked quietly as the group surrounding Brianna reached her. Charisma saw Brianna's eyes flutter closed for the merest second, then those green eyes met hers for a beat before turning back to her staff.

"You guys go ahead and get started with what I've already given you. I'll catch up to you in a minute." Every member of her team met her look and nodded sharply before they turned as a singular body and headed further up the hallway into their office. Only once the door was closed behind them did Brianna turn back to Charisma and meet her eyes. "Charisma," she greeted cordially, though the smile on her lips never reached her eyes. "What can I do for you?"

"Nothing. I squandered my chances and I know that. I just wanted to see for myself that you were all right."

"You could have called," Brianna chided gently. Charisma just shook her head.

"Not the same thing. Besides, I expected all of you to be sleeping this morning."

"Well, I certainly hope Esmeralda and Saphira are. I have a lunch meeting that I couldn't miss, or believe me... I'd have called in sick today."

Charisma chuckled. "I'm pretty sure your lunch meeting would have understood. After all, you made the paper *and* the news." She paused and searched Brianna's face carefully. "Are you certain you're all right? You know Mama is going to ask me if she doesn't ask you first."

Brianna smiled, though it was as tired and sad as any Charisma had ever seen. "I'm sure she will, regardless of what I told her. I'm fine," she continued without allowing Charisma to comment. "I was never in any danger - Saphira and Esmeralda saw to that. Esmeralda caught me before I could kiss the ground and Saphira had the assailant down and disarmed before Esmeralda and I could even straighten up from the near fall the kid caused. It was over before it got started. I'm fine, Charisma," Brianna reiterated. "Really."

Charisma nodded slowly. "I won't even ask what you were thinking riding the Metro that time of night," holding up her hands before Brianna could say a word. "I'm just glad you had Saphira and Esmeralda with you. Are they all right?"

"Everyone is okay - the worst thing that happened to any of us was the mountain of paperwork we had to deal with at the police station. Honestly, you'd have thought *we* were the criminals the way the cops were acting for a while."

Charisma nodded. "I'm glad you're all right, Brianna." She let her hand rest briefly on Brianna's arm and gave it a slight squeeze before removing it. "I'll...." She motioned in the general direction of Brianna's office before dropping her hand to rest on the doorknob of her own. "I'll let you get to work. The sooner you get done, the sooner you can go home and get some sleep."

"Yeah... don't think I'm not counting the minutes for that little phenomenon to occur either." She turned and headed up the hallway a couple steps, then whirled back around to catch Charisma's eyes following her retreat. "Thanks for asking, Charisma. I think Esmeralda plans to be here tonight if you want to stick around and check on her."

Charisma frowned hard. "Are you kidding me?"

"Not at all. She told me she didn't have any time left on the books - I think part of her time off during her illness was unpaid leave. The only reason she didn't lose her job is because she's well-liked and trusted by the Senators she works for, and she does exceptional work besides."

"That's not right!"

"No, but I suspect it's the truth. I just know she said they can't afford for her to miss any more work for a while."

"I may have to look into that," Charisma grumbled, looking at the ground for a long moment. Brianna watched in silent fascination as Charisma turned her focus inward. Finally, Charisma seemed to come to a decision within herself and when that was settled, she met Brianna's eyes once more. "Thank you, Brianna. I appreciate you stopping to talk to me. I know we're not supposed to be friends anymore...."

"Charisma, we will never be best friends again, but I think we will always be friends - even if it's only casually. And it's all right for casual friends to be interested in each others' lives, especially when something scary like last night happens to one of them. Thanks for being interested enough to check up on me."

Before Charisma could find words to respond, Brianna turned away from her again and made her way down the hall to her office. When the door closed behind her, Charisma released the lip she'd been biting and shook her head while blinking furiously to clear the tears from her eyes before they started rolling down her cheeks unchecked. Then she took a deep breath and opened the door to her office, calling out orders as she made her way back into her inner sanctum. Opal and Luke just exchanged looks - she scrambled to keep up with Charisma's voice and he started making phone calls.

Down the hall, it was much more subdued. Though they all observed Brianna surreptitiously, her staff didn't need any more directives from her. So they watched her sail through the outer office and into her inner one, wondering what Charisma had said to their boss to put the slump in her shoulders. They didn't ask - they knew Brianna would blame it on her fatigue, though the slump hadn't been present before her rendezvous with Charisma in the hallway.

Brianna closed the door softly behind her and crossed to the refrigerator, confidently removing a pint of milk before walking to her desk. Once seated and assured of at least a few minutes of privacy, she shook the milk and popped it open, guzzling half of it before opening the bottom right-hand drawer where she usually stashed her purse. There, face down, was the Waterford frame that had been prominently placed on the desk of every office she had worked in... until now.

She glared at the back of it, as though willing it to get up out of the drawer and walk away from her. She didn't really care where - she just couldn't keep the reminder out anymore and she knew she wasn't strong enough to get rid of it on her own. Without a word, Brianna dropped her purse on top of the crystal, then closed and locked the drawer.

Maybe if she was lucky a good fairy would dispose of it on their own, and she wouldn't have to worry about it. Then she snorted and shook her head. She'd stopped believing in magic a long time ago, and recent events had only reinforced that. Brianna finished her milk and tossed the bottle in the recycle bin. Then she pulled forward the papers she needed to work on before her lunch meeting. Maybe then she could go home and sleep.



Chapter LXXXI

The sound of movement in her outer office brought Charisma out of the haze she'd let herself fall into. Ostensibly, she was working, of course, but the truth was that her focus was much more concentrated on listening for Esmeralda than it was on actually reading what was in front of her. So as soon as she heard stirring in the front office, Charisma straightened the papers on her desk and rose, crossing to the door quickly and opening it.

Esmeralda was already engrossed in her work and with her back towards Charisma, it made it easy for Charisma to study her unobserved. Esmeralda didn't seem to be moving any slower than normal, though there was a tired droop in her overall body language. When she shifted enough to glimpse her face, Charisma was pleased not to see the exhaustion she expected to be there.

After a long moment, Esmeralda stiffened, realizing she was no longer alone. She turned slowly, unsurprised to see Charisma's eyes on her, though her sight seemed to be somewhere beyond the room they were standing in or Esmeralda herself. Esmeralda approached Charisma deliberately, recognizing the exact moment she was once again aware of her surroundings.

"Senator Tagherty?" watching Charisma frown and her eyes narrow. "Charisma... are you all right?" feeling a distinct sense of déjà vu settle over her. Charisma looked her over carefully before offering Esmeralda a wry expression.

"Isn't that supposed to be my line?" she asked drolly. "After all, I'm not the one who was getting attacked in the Metro at oh-my-God-o'clock this morning."

"Well in fairness, neither was I," Esmeralda stated plainly. "But I understand what you mean," she continued when Charisma glowered at her. "We're fine," she continued. "I think Saphira fared the worst of the three of us, and that only because she was nearly buried by the ton of paperwork they shoved at her. And then they wonder why humans are so ad]verse to getting involved when there is trouble - you'd have thought we were the criminals the way they went on there for a while."

"Do you regret it... helping Brianna, I mean?"

"Oh no... of course not. But that was easy - Brianna is our friend. But I'm sure the treatment would have been the same had it been a stranger... maybe even worse. It's very disheartening when you really stop and think about it. I know Saphira was ready to smack some heads together."

Charisma laughed. "I'd have paid to have seen that."

"You wouldn't have needed to - she'd have gladly done it for free. At least it's over with, and with a little luck, we won't have to testify. Brianna's statement combined with ours and the video footage should be enough to put the kid away for a while."

"Did he say anything? Do you know why she was the target?"

Esmeralda shook her head. "By his own admission, he thought she'd be an easy mark. He had no idea she was a Senator, and he never could have predicted Saphira's prowess."

"Well, he should have plenty of time to consider his actions." Charisma paused and cleared her throat. "Listen... are you sure you should even be here tonight? I don't want you having a relapse, Es… none of us do."

"That's sweet, Charisma. But this is my job, and I need to be here." She smiled to take any sting out of her words. "Don't worry - I promise I'm going slow enough to not needlessly tire myself out, and Rick is keeping an eye on me too. I won't overdo and as soon as I'm done, I'm going home and going straight back to bed."

"All right." Charisma nodded. "Fair enough. Help yourself to a chocolate milk or two - I don't want you falling down on my watch either," said in a scolding tone but with a glimmer of a twinkle in her eye.

Esmeralda chuckled. "Aye aye sir... ma'am," she corrected with a grin. "Trust me, Charisma. I have no desire to feel the way I felt before. I'll do what it takes to keep from feeling that way ever again. Oh... and for some reason," rolling her eyes, "I didn't get to talk to Saphira about next weekend last night. I'll try and do it tonight."

"I think I can forgive you the oversight this once," Charisma returned drolly. "Just don't let it happen again, okay?"

"I'll do my best," Esmeralda agreed.

"Good. Let me just pack up and I'll get out of your way for the evening."

Esmeralda nodded and continued on with her work. When she was ready to go, Charisma lifted the phone on her desk and called down to the drivers' room. Then she gazed thoughtfully at Esmeralda.

"I'm headed out for the evening. You get some rest, and I'll see you tomorrow night." She paused and Esmeralda waited. "I'm glad you're all right, Es... you and Saphira both. And thank you... for looking out for Brianna." She took a deep, shuddering breath and dropped her scrutiny to the floor. "I know I don't have any right, but I wouldn't have… well, I can't imagine...."

Esmeralda moved so silently and swiftly that Charisma didn't realize she was there until she turned around and found Esmeralda within her personal space. She stared into green eyes, surprised to find no pity - only compassion - and she let herself relax into the embrace Esmeralda offered. Charisma sighed and soaked up the comfort.

After a long moment, she pulled away in embarrassment. Before Charisma could speak, Esmeralda cupped her cheek and shook her head. "No," she commanded quietly. "Don't apologize for your feelings... especially to me. When you're ready to talk, you know where to find me."

"How did you...?"

Esmeralda chuckled. "Charisma, I know you think I'm a kid compared to you, but trust me when I tell you that I've lived through a lot in my lifetime. And I know what it's like to have an epiphany about yourself that changes everything you ever thought about yourself. I've seen the expression in your eyes before when I've looked in the mirror."

Charisma leaned in for a second and hugged Esmeralda again before totally withdrawing and picking up her briefcase. "Thank you, Es. For so much." Then without another word, she let herself out of the office and closed the door behind her. Esmeralda watched her go, staring at the door for another long moment before she took a deep breath and got back to work.

************

"Wow - she really...?" Saphira set a plate in front of Esmeralda and poured them both a glass of milk before taking a seat beside her at the kitchen table. Ruby had insisted on covering her shift; Saphira had called and Matilda had agreed when she'd heard about the way their previous evening had ended, though she called in the new girl to help Ruby, so Ruby had come home earlier and gone straight to bed. Now it was just the two of them sitting together at the table while Esmeralda indulged in a rare peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

"She did. I dunno, Phira - I don't know what to think about this mission anymore. This has gone so far beyond anything I ever even considered as a possibility. I know we're not done - obviously... He hasn't called us... them... home. But I'm at a loss to know what to do anymore."

"Maybe you're not supposed to do anything at this point." Saphira sighed and wrapped her hands around her glass of milk. "If you're completely honest, this whole project has been one snafu after another. You haven't been able to access the information you need or direct things like you normally would and it's become a complete fubar, correct?"

Esmeralda sighed. "That's probably a little harsher than I would have put it, but it about sums things up, yes."

"Maybe you're... *we're*... just supposed to be here for them. Because Charisma has lived in the closet so long, she's become wallpaper. Her mindset won't change overnight, no matter what happens in her life. Things like last night might help speed her thinking along, but she's going to have to be the one that ultimately changes her life - because that's what this will be for her. Maybe we're just supposed to be there and support them while she comes to the realizations she needs to."

"Maybe," Esmeralda agreed slowly, taking another bite of her sandwich and chewing thoughtfully. "Still, I was amazed by her tonight."

"But what about Brianna?"

"I don't know. I think if Charisma wants, she's gonna have to be willing to risk everything. Brianna won't believe her otherwise." Esmeralda swallowed the last bite of her sandwich and finished her milk before she stood and took her dishes to the sink. "Well, tomorrow is another day. Maybe we'll get a few more baby steps - eventually they might add up to a step forward." She rinsed off her dishes, then did the same with Saphira's glass. "C'mon... it's past my bedtime."

Saphira accepted the hand Esmeralda extended and led them into the bedroom. Tomorrow would come soon enough for them.

***********

The rest of the week passed rather casually for everyone. Brianna and Charisma only met in the hallway twice, and otherwise had no real interaction. Scott Patterson wondered aloud if they'd had a lovers quarrel as neither woman suddenly seemed to have the time of day for the other, but several Senators pointed out they had all been busy trying to get back into the swing of things. Another two had taken him aside privately and reminded him that speculation like that outside his office was likely to get him the kind of press no politician wanted. So he let it go with murmurings and grumblings - and vowed to keep an eye on both women. Tagherty especially was someone he wouldn't mind undermining. She held a chair he coveted for his own. So he sat back to wait... and watch.

For their own parts, Brianna and Charisma were both actually quite busy with work. New sessions always meant restarting from scratch on a lot of things, and they were in and out of committee meetings constantly. For Brianna, it was a relief. It allowed her to settle back into work without the pressure of resuming a more familiar friendship with Charisma. That might happen one day, but it wasn't going to be immediate.

For Charisma, it was an exercise in frustration. Her mind was being pulled in so many directions - not the least of which was her last conversation with Okasa. As predicted, Okasa had called as soon as she'd heard the news about Brianna's attack. And that phone call just kept replaying over and over in Charisma's mind.

************

"Charisma, it's Mama. What's going on down there? Do I need to send Hunter down there to look after you girls? What happened?? How's Brianna? And is someone looking after Saphira and Esmeralda? I'm sure they need...."

"Mama... MAMA - slow down a minute and let me get a word in edgewise, all right? Brianna's fine; I spoke to her earlier today. She came into work for a little while this morning, and then went home to get some sleep. I'll see Es before I go home tonight. She told Brianna she'd be in to work tonight."

"What?? Is she crazy?? That child needs to rest... especially after that kind of excitement. And what about Saphira? I know your brother said she should have been in law enforcement, but what on Earth was she thinking, taking on an armed thug like that?? Don't get me wrong - I'm thrilled she was able to take him out without anyone getting hurt, but my God!! What if something had happened to her... or Esmeralda... or Brianna?? Do you kids have any idea how much I worry?? There's a reason there's more salt than pepper in my hair, you know."

"Yes, Mama - I know," Charisma broke in before Okasa really got wound up. "Do you want me to ask Brianna to call you? You know she would."

"NO." The reply so sharp that Charisma expected it to draw blood. "No," Okasa repeated a second time, though much more softly than the first. "She's asked for space and I'll be damned if we don't give her that. That doesn't mean I'm going to worry any less." She took a deep breath. "You talk to Es and you call and let me know how she seems to you."

"I will, Mama."

"All right, Baby Girl - how are you holding up?"

Charisma snorted. "You know how new sessions are."

"I know I'm glad I never went into politics. You take care of yourself and my grandson. And if you need us, Paddy and I are only a phone call away."

"I know, Mama, and I appreciate it."

"I love you, Charisma."

"Love you too, Mama. Bye."


************

That conversation, combined with the rumors Charisma was fairly sure Scott Patterson had a hand in as well as Brianna's distinct avoidance of her combined to be running her mind in a vicious circle. She idly wondered what Patterson would think if her separation from Kent became public knowledge. Charisma made a mental note to stick around a little late tonight and talk to Esmeralda. Maybe Esmeralda could help her get things straight in her mind... so to speak.

************

"Charisma? Is something wrong?"

Charisma's head popped up at the sound of her name and she regarded Esmeralda with quizzical eyes. "Why would you think something was wrong, Es?"

Esmeralda smirked. "It's Friday night - you should either be home with your son or out having dinner and drinks with your colleagues. Instead, you're curled up on your office couch reading...." Esmeralda tilted her head trying to read the title of the book Charisma still had open on her lap. "Well, I'm not sure what you're reading - I'm pretty sure it's not any sort of legislation though. So either something is up in a bad way or you're waiting to talk to me."

"I want you to know that is still a little freaky to me. No one has ever been able to read me the way you can - I'll be honest... it scares me a little."

"I'm not trying...."

"I know. I'm just thankful you use your powers for good," Charisma offered with a smile. She patted the seat beside her. "Come sit down - because you're right... I was waiting to talk to you. And I'm not sure I can wait until next Sunday."

"Sounds serious."

"It is serious. I...." Charisma bit her lip and looked down at the book still open in her lap. With single-minded focus, she marked her place precisely and closed the book with due deliberation. Once she was satisfied that her bookmark was perfectly even and the book jacket corners were seated correctly, Charisma put the book carefully on the table in front of her. Then she clasped her hands in her lap... so tightly that her knuckles turned white - quite noticeable on her olive-toned skin. She started when Esmeralda covered her fists with a gentle touch and raised confused blue eyes to meet understanding green.

"Talk to me, Charisma - it's just you and me here, and I don't bite unless your name is Saphira and you ask nicely," drawing the laugh she was looking for. Charisma nodded her head and looked down at their joined hands, then sucked in a shaky breath.

"I've messed up, and I don't know how to fix it."

"Do you know what you did wrong?"

"I think so. I think I took too much and gave too little."

"Do you know what you want your results to be?"

"I don't understand," Charisma replied, frowning in genuine bewilderment.

"Yeah... I didn't phrase that very well, did I?" Esmeralda sighed. "Let me lay this out a little and you can tell me if I'm on the right track or not, all right?" Charisma nodded and waited for Esmeralda to continue. "Since Brianna returned to your life, she's bent over backwards for you - trying to make you comfortable with her again; offering you friendship that took you a little while to accept; returning to your family with you because you asked her to. Right so far?"

"Yes, but...."

"Shh," the directive causing Charisma's mouth to snap shut so quickly, she almost bit her tongue. "You were jealous... DON'T, Charisma," before she could deny Esmeralda's words. "I was there; I know what I saw. And I wasn't the only one either. You were almost insane with jealousy. Then you realized why Brianna had said goodbye to you in Barcelona - why she'd walked out of your life. So you decided you could have it all - a husband and son for appearances and the best friend you'd missed like crazy - it was all yours for the taking. Except things didn't quite work out that way did they?" her voice gentle.

Charisma snorted. "Not even close. I don't know... hell, I don't know a damn thing, evidently. My life has gone to hell in a hand basket and I'm not sure what to do to fix it - I'm not sure what I *can* do at this point, much less what I *want* to do. My husband has filed for separation, and every reason he gave was a viable one. He even made it possible for me to have the final say on whether we stay married or not. As for Brianna...." Charisma shook her head. "I'm not sure there's anything I can do to fix the damage I've done there. I don't think she cares anymore."

"What if I told you she does?" Charisma met Esmeralda's eyes in an intense stare. "Charisma, she has done all the giving in this relationship since she returned to the forefront of your life. Don't you think it's time you offered her the same courtesy?"

"Es, you're asking me to be someone I'm not."

"No, Charisma - I'm asking you to be honest about who you are." Esmeralda paused and took a deep breath. "Let me ask you something, Charisma, and I want you to think about your answer. If you're so concerned with your image, why haven't you destroyed those separation papers? I can understand why you didn't shred them right away - if Kent took you by surprise when he served them to you, I'm sure your first reaction was one of shock. But Charisma... if I have this figured right, it's been almost a week if not longer - which tells me you're considering it as a possibility. And what about the letters Brianna wrote you - have you read them yet?"

"How did you...?"

"Don't ask - I promised not to tell. The other I guessed based on when you originally told me about Kent filing separation papers." Esmeralda shook her head to get back on track. "Charisma, I'm not trying to make you feel bad or add to your confusion. You don't like what your life is at the moment, so you need to change it, correct?" Charisma nodded. "Assume you only have this one chance to make your life over into what you want it to be from now on - what kind of result do you want to come from the changes you make? That's the first thing you need to decide. You can't really move forward until you know where you're headed."

"You're pretty smart, Es," Charisma whispered.

"Hard won experience, Senator."

Silence for several long moments. "I don't know if I can do this, Es. I don't know if I am strong enough... or unselfish enough."

"You won't be alone, Charisma, no matter what you choose to do... not if you don't want to be. Maybe you should go home and think about what's really important to you. Decide what will make you happiest. Once you figure that out, the rest should fall into place."

"You make it sound so easy."

"It's only hard if you let it be."

"Was it easy for you?"

"Once I realized what my life would be like without Saphira in it, it was the easiest decision I've ever made. I've never regretted it... even with the hardships we've experienced, because we've been together. And that's enough for me. You'll have to determine what's best for you, Charisma - but regardless of what you choose, you're going to have to learn the art of giving."

"I can't make any promises."

"I'm not asking you too."

Charisma held Esmeralda's eyes. "I have a feeling I'm going to have to learn a good many things."



Chapter LXXXII

Saturday morning Charisma called Ame and asked her to take Adam out for a while. "Anywhere," she instructed, "except the Natural History Museum. Kent is planning to take him there tomorrow."

"How about the Bounce House?"

Charisma cut her eyes at Ame, but nodded her reluctant agreement. "Call Turq. I don't want you riding out there on the Metro. And before you ask, McDonald's is fine for lunch as long as you make sure he gets milk to drink."

"What time would you like us home, Senator?"

"You can come home when you're ready Ame, but if I'm not downstairs, I'd like to ask you to stay here with Adam. Once I come downstairs, you'll be free to go."

"Of course Senator," Ame replied without inflection and Charisma felt the need to apologize.

"I'm sorry for taking so much of your personal time lately, Ame. I will try to make it up to you somehow." Ame shook her head and laid a hand on Charisma's arm lightly.

"It's all right, Senator. I don't have much use for personal time at the moment and Adam and I get along splendidly, don't we?" looking at Adam and smiling. He nodded his head enthusiastically. Charisma chuckled.

"Fair enough," Charisma replied. She knelt to look at Adam eye to eye. "You be good for Ame, okay?"

"Adam good boy," he assured his mother. She opened her arms and he jumped into them, giving Charisma a sloppy kiss and rubbing their noses together before letting go. When he stepped back, Charisma stood and turned back to Ame.

"I'll get him ready, Senator and take care of locking up when we leave. You go ahead and...." trailing off and motioning towards the stairs. "We've got it covered."

"Thanks, Ame," Charisma said. "Bye, son."

"Love Mama."

"Love you too, Adam." Then Charisma turned and headed upstairs without another word. She had one more selfish act to indulge in before she could do as Esmeralda had asked of her.

************

Charisma steeled herself as she crossed the threshold into her bedroom, closing the door and locking it firmly behind her. She leaned against the door and closed her eyes, breathing deeply for almost a full minute. Then she pushed away from the door and moved to her closet, flipping on the light and leaving the door open as she entered. Charisma made her way to the back and pulled out the plastic box Brianna had given her.

She knelt beside it, lifting the lid and closing her eyes as her senses were once again assaulted by memories of another lifetime. She wasn't sure how it had happened - especially considering that Okasa'd had possession of the container until just recently - but she could smell the essence of her life with Brianna in the box. Perhaps it was a lingering trace of her perfume, but there was something quintessentially Brianna in the scent that rose to Charisma's nostrils now.

Charisma let the memories wash over her - one big wave of thoughts and feelings she'd put away when Brianna had walked away from her all those years ago. There would be time and opportunity to examine them one by one later, but for now, she was a woman on a mission.

She removed the thickest packet from the box, knowing it was also the oldest, smiling sadly when she recognized the ribbon Okasa had used as one Brianna had given her. Charisma untied the silky material, rubbing it through her fingers. Then she picked up the top envelope and slit it open carefully. She took a deep breath and slid out the folded paper. Then she flipped it open and let her eyes focus on the handwriting that had once been as familiar as her own before she started to read.

************

Dear Charisma, (it read)

I am writing this to you because Okasa asked me to, and truthfully, I think it may be the only chance I have of purging everything that's inside of me without causing you any undo stress or upset. Here, I can be completely honest... with you, with me, with the world-at-large - because I figure no one but me will ever see these letters. I will certainly never share them with anyone else and unlike Okasa, I'm not some sort of cockeyed optimist - I know you will never ask about me, so you will never know about them. Because you will never want to admit that you know why I said goodbye.

Here Charisma stopped reading, drawing in a shuddering breath before she lay the letter carefully down on the floor and rose. When she returned to the closet, she'd already used one tissue to wipe her face and blow her nose, and she carried a box of them in one hand and a water bottle in the other. She wisely set the water in a corner away from the box, and placed the tissue beside her. Then Charisma picked up the letter and resumed her reading.

You see, I realized something recently - well, that's not completely true. The truth I realized some time ago, but I have only recently admitted it to myself. I love you. There... I said it. I love you, Charisma Tagherty and I am in love with you. There are probably a hundred reasons why, and maybe one of these days, I'll sit down and write them all out for us both here in these pages. But for now, suffice it to say that I do love you - heart and soul.

When I finally acknowledged my love for you to myself, I knew I had no choice - I had to walk away. I'm sure you're angry right now... maybe hurt that I am out of your life. But deep, deep in your heart, you know why I left and that's why I know you won't come looking for me. Because you feel the same thing I do - I've seen it. The difference is you would never be willing to love me, and I won't stay around and be a martyr... I can't. Right now the only way I can protect myself is to be away from you... to erect some walls and barriers against you, so that eventually, you won't matter to me the way I already don't matter to you.

Maybe one day, we'll run into each other again and we can be polite and civilized to one another. We can give each other those fake smiles and hugs politicians and actors are known for, then we can reminisce about the 'good old days'. You'll introduce me to the husband and children I'm sure you'll have by then, and maybe I'll be able to introduce you to my partner and our family. With any luck, though, that will be years and years from now. Because right now, all there is in my heart is you, and I can't see beyond that.

I read back over this letter and saw that I haven't really said anything yet. There is so much inside of me dying to get out, but all I can think of at the moment is how long the rest of my life is going to be without you in it... and how much that thought hurts.

I am going to wait a few days before I try this again. Maybe then, I can channel some of the anger I feel... or some of the pain... or some of the hatred. Because it's all there... in spades. Still, despite everything I know and everything I feel right now, I don't think my love for you will ever change. Maybe I should just write a book.

I love you Charisma. I just wish you could love me too.

B


************

Charisma took a deep breath and reached for her water bottle, drinking down half of it and closing her eyes against the words staring back at her from the page she'd just read. Gently she returned the first letter to its envelope and placed it face down beside her before turning her attention to the next envelope in the stack. Slicing it much as she had the first one, she removed the folded paper from inside and opened the letter and started reading Brianna's next missive.

One followed another in this fashion, and Charisma found Brianna had been very honest about the multitude of feelings and emotions contained within each epistle. Some made her heart hurt; some made her furious; some made her suck in her breath in surprise; and one or two made her smile wistfully. But despite the pain or anger or hatred that Brianna spoke about, she always reminded Charisma that she loved her before she ended each note.

As the letters went on, Brianna started sharing a little more about what was happening in her life and less about what she felt. It was almost as though Charisma became her pen pal - or her diary - though there was very little personal in anything Brianna said. She wrote nothing about Kay or any of the other love affairs she'd been involved in. Mostly she wrote about interesting things that happened or about the cases she was immersed in... almost as though they were college confidantes again. And Charisma found herself laughing aloud at some of the things Brianna deemed fit to share.

Then she reached the letter that was written after her engagement to Kent was announced to the family, and she realized how few letters Brianna had written since then. Slowly, Charisma cut the envelope open and removed the paper from it. Then she steadied herself and began reading.

************

Dear Charisma, (it read)

Okasa called me today - she wanted to tell me about your engagement before it made the news. I'm not quite sure what to say here. I'd like to say congratulations, but I wouldn't really mean it. It's not that I wish you ill, Charisma - it's because I know that you're settling.

Okasa tells me your fiancé is a nice guy that you like and someone you feel will be a good father to whatever children you have together. Oh my God, Charisma… are you kidding me?? Is he aware that all you feel for him is 'like', Charisma? Is he willing to settle for being second, third or fourth place in your line of priorities behind your job, your children and the rest your family? Whatever happened to love, Charisma? What happened to the passionate woman I knew in college... the one who wouldn't compromise what she wanted for anything??

However, I hope you find happiness with Kent Rockwell, Charisma... I really do. But I also think you're a fool for conforming to what you think is expected of you instead of simply being who you are. More fool me for thinking you ever could.

I don't think I'll be writing you many more letters, Charisma. It's been obvious to me for years that you never thought of me as anything more than someone to fill a gap that leaving your family for the first time created in your life. And that time has long since passed both of us by.

I will always love you, Charisma, but I won't allow you to be more than a memory anymore.

B


************

Charisma started to clench her hands before she realized she still held the letter. Prudently, she folded the paper and tucked it back into its envelope, and gently set it back on the pile of untied notes. Then she shifted until she could lean against the wall and wrapped her arms around her knees... and simply cried.

She had no idea how much time had passed, but when the tears slowed, Charisma's face was swollen and her eyes burned. She grabbed a handful of tissues and dabbed at her face, hissing at the tenderness of her skin. Charisma pushed herself upright and eased out of the closet, the pounding in her head from crying so hard making it a difficult process at best.

She made it to the bathroom and ran cool water over her face until she couldn't feel the cold from it any longer. Then she leaned her arms on the counter and stared at the reflection gazing back at her. Charisma flinched slightly - there was no way to hide the crying spell she'd just subjected herself to, and eventually she was going to have to go downstairs if only so Ame could go home and get some rest.

She blew out a breath, weighing her options, then she moved back to the closet. With only a couple more letters to read, Charisma decided to finish them before she took a shower. Maybe that would make her a little more presentable.

Charisma sat back down and picked up the first of the last three letters and realized it had been written shortly after Adam's birth.

************

Dear Charisma, (it read)

I saw a picture of your son today - Okasa couldn't wait to show me her newest grandson... not that I blame her. He's a beautiful baby, Charisma... reminds me very much of his mama. I hope he brings you all the happiness in the world.

B


************

Charisma wondered at the shortness of the letter - surely there was more Brianna had wanted to say about the birth of Charisma's child, wasn't there? After all, it had been the most momentous event in Charisma's life, with the possible exception of meeting Brianna Walker for the first time. Then Charisma bit her lip - of course, Brianna had no way of knowing that... at least not when this note was written. Charisma wondered what Brianna would have said if she had been there at Adam's birth. Would she have cooed over him? Doted on him? Held him and rocked him to sleep? Charisma closed her eyes in silent acknowledgment of the truth of all of those options - of course she would have... she had done as much for each of her brother's children, and all of them held Brianna in as high a regard as Adam did.

Charisma blew out a shaky, frustrated breath and reached for the next letter. She opened it, then froze as the words on the page started to make sense in her mind.

************

Dear Charisma, (it read)

I was in an accident today. Nothing too damaging - after all, I'm sitting here writing to you about it, right? Still, it was enough to freak me out pretty good... it actually scared the bejesus out of me - I'm still shaking. It wasn't actually my fault this time - I wasn't even driving. But some moron ran a red light and crashed into the passenger side of the car I was riding in. Thank God for airbags.

Pretty sure the airbag impact knocked me out for a few minutes, because I remember coming back to myself wondering what the hell had happened and why the hell my head felt like it was being used as a punching bag. My ears are still ringing in point of fact. But aside from some achies and some owies, I'm okay. I'm going to be bruised and sore in the morning, but I'm walking on two good legs and there are no broken bones or a concussion in sight. So really - things could be a lot worse than they are. I'm counting my blessings at this juncture.

I supposed you wonder why I'm writing now... after so much time away, since I don't really count the short note of congratulations I wrote just after Adam's birth as writing to you. While I was trapped in that car trying to get my bearings and praying that I didn't puke all over myself from the nauseating headache that was pounding in my brain, I realized that I kind of missed talking to you like this. After all, here you are still my best friend. Here, you still listen to what I have to say and care about who I am. And since you're never going to see these little missives, the only person missing out if I don't write these letters to you is me.

So I may try writing you again. I have a lot less time than I used to have - working in the DA's office cut into my free time considerably, but nothing like becoming the DA did. What the hell was I thinking when I decided that was a good idea?? I've a good mind to chuck the whole business and just write full-time, but I think I would miss the challenge if I did that.

Still, it's something to think about.

I was on my way to a meeting with the Governor when the accident happened. Guess he'll have to wait until the ringing in my ears stops before we get together. Hopefully it wasn't too pressing.

B


************

Charisma shook her head and noticed her hand was shaking. She wondered how long it had taken Brianna to recover from the achies and owies and if she still felt occasional twinges from the impact. She offered up a small prayer of thanks for the fact that Brianna had not been severely injured or worse, feeling a tremor of terror settle in her guts when she considered how much worse it easily could have been. Then she turned her attention to the final letter in the pile and slowly opened it.

************

Dear Charisma, (it read)

This will be my last letter for a while. That meeting with the Governor? He wants me be a placeholder for a Senate seat. Seems Senator Whitman is in need of some recovery time and he and Michael think I'm the perfect candidate to keep his seat while he does so.

I tried to make them both understand that I'm not interested in politics - apparently *that* is why they chose me for the job. This way, if Richard is able to run again in two years, he won't be running against me... only the candidate from the other party.

Whatever - it's shaping up to be a clusterfuck if you ask me. However, it's only for two years - I should be able to stay out of your sphere for the most part, and I think we could both manage to be cordial to one another if we have to.

Okasa - hell, your whole damn family - seem to think this is a sign from God or something... that I should take this opportunity and make sure you know the whole truth. That would be a big hell to the no!

I will take this assignment because I want to see you again one more time, and I know that the only way that's ever going to happen will be in a professional setting. I can do two years... at least I hope I can do two years. I will see you and talk to you and no one will ever have a reason to question my professionalism as far as you are concerned. They will never know we knew one another before my arrival in Washington from me.

And when my two years is up, I will retire from politics and the law and find somewhere else to be. Because I know as surely as I am writing this letter that you will let me go again, and when I do, it will be for good... mine as well as yours.

I wish things had been different - I wish they would be different than I know they will, but I just don't have that kind of faith anymore. Maybe if I'm lucky, you'll be kind and we can be friendly for the next two years.

But I'm not holding my breath on that possibility either.

B


************

Charisma folded up the last letter and tied the batch back together with that yarn she recognized as being part of a baby blanket Okasa had made for Adam. Without a sound she neatly replaced the bundles in order and closed the lid before tucking the box away and grabbing her things. Then she shut off the light and closed the closet door.

With a deep breath, she moved towards the bathroom. Maybe a shower would help her relax and help her put her thoughts in order.



Chapter LXXXIII

Charisma's shower turned into a bath, and as she slowly relaxed into the hot water, she turned her mind to the letters she'd read. She realized that many of Brianna's shared memories came from time she'd spent with the Tagherty clan and Charisma knew regardless of anything else, she had to give Brianna back the family she'd had with the Taghertys. Too much of their life and too many of their memories were shared and no one else should have to suffer for her foolishness.

Her mind made up, Charisma bathed quickly in the cooling water, then wrapped herself in the fluffiest robe she owned and left the bathroom in search of Adam and Ame.

The house was dark when she exited her bedroom, and she wondered. Swiftly, she crossed the hall to Adam's room, breathing a sigh of relief to find him curled in his bed sound asleep. Then she frowned - how late was it that he was already in bed? And where was Ame?

Charisma closed the door softly behind her and looked around, noting that the door of one of the guest rooms was closed. She bit her lip thoughtfully, then shook her head and went downstairs.

It was dark down there as well with the exception of a few strategically located nightlights. Charisma looked around carefully, noting everything was locked up tight and the alarm had been set. She walked into the kitchen, her eyes nearly bugging out of her head when she realized the clock really did read one forty-seven. Charisma blinked rapidly, trying to reconcile what her eyes were telling her with what she'd thought was reality.

She flipped the light switch, not surprised to find a note on the table.

Senator Tagherty, (it read)

It's eleven o'clock and Adam's been fed, bathed and put to bed. I knocked on your door earlier, but you didn't answer, so I've taken the monitor and gone into the guest room next to Adam's room. If that is not acceptable, please wake me. Otherwise, I will be happy to keep an ear out for him tonight.

Ame


Charisma blinked - she really was going to have to find something amazing to do for Ame soon. God knew the woman had been going above and beyond for some time. However - she covered her mouth as she yawned and felt the weight of her exhaustion suddenly pressing down on her. Anything she decided was going to have to wait until tomorrow - suddenly all she wanted was to close her eyes and let oblivion take over for just a little while. Charisma debated the merits of getting something to eat, then decided she was too tired to chew. With a sigh, she turned off the light and trudged slowly back upstairs. Tomorrow was going to come far too soon, even if she didn't show up until lunch.

Speaking of - she made a mental note to call Opal first thing to arrange lunch with Brianna. Sighing again, she dropped the robe she wore onto the floor and climbed into bed naked. She was asleep before her head hit the pillow.

************

Opal closed her cell phone and looked around the kitchen before focusing her gaze on Indi. "That was Ame. Apparently Charisma asked her to call me - she would like me to set up lunch between her and Brianna immediately. Can you...?"

"She does know today is Sunday morning, right? Very early on Sunday morning - I may not even be able to reach Brianna."

"I don't know. You heard my side of the conversation - Ame was just delivering a message."

Indi sighed, not really liking where this was going. "Personal or professional?"

"Personal," Opal said with a grimace that Indi matched. "But she said it was urgent."

"All I can do is try and set it up. Time?"

"One-thirty. According to Ame, Charisma will probably be running late this morning. She was up late last night reading the letters Brianna wrote her."

"Well hallelujah - progress," Ruby said with a hint of snark. She looked around at the others who were staring at her in disbelief. "What?" she whined plaintively. "Every one of you were thinking it as well, and since Saphira isn't awake yet to say it aloud, I figured someone needed to."

"Speaking of... do you think we need to wake them - let Es know what's going on?"

"No," Ruby replied instantly. "Nothing is going to change what's already happened, so we can wait until they get up on their own. We'll all still be here when they do - it's not like we have to be in a rush to be anywhere this morning."

"Who's rushing where?" Amber asked as she stepped into the kitchen. "What?" she asked when everyone turned and looked at her. "I didn't do anything."

"But you did have an interesting evening, didn't you?" Ruby queried, even as she eased Amber into her chair. "Did Ame send you home?"

"Pretty much. Since she stayed the night, I made sure she slept; so we decided I'd come home now to let Es know what happened last night," accepting the coffee cup Ruby put in front of her with a smile and a grateful nod. "Are they still...?" jerking her head towards the bedroom door.

"Yes."

"Well, I'm gonna wake them - Es needs to know... what?" looking at Ruby when the older woman put a restraining hand on her arm. "Ruby?"

"Amber, don't you think it can wait a little while?"

"What can wait?" Esmeralda asked as she rubbed her eyes. "Good morning," she greeted as she made a beeline for the coffeepot. "What are we waiting on?"

Amber smirked. "You," she teased. "It's been busy since you went to bed."

"Seriously?" Esmeralda looked at the clock. "Is that why you're home so early? Where's Coral? And Ame?"

"That's part of the story, Es. Pull up a chair and I'll bring you up to date on what happened last night."

"And we'll tell you about the phone call this morning," Opal added.

Esmeralda dropped into the chair Amber held for her and looked around expectantly. "All right," she conceded with a nod. "Let's hear it."

************

They all sat silently when Amber finished recounting the events of the previous day at Charisma's home. Esmeralda held her gaze for a moment longer, then turned to Opal who shared the details of Ame's phone call earlier. When she was done, Esmeralda closed her eyes and ran her hands through her hair. After a few minutes of silence, Esmeralda looked up.

"I thought I'd call Brianna about nine," Indi offered. "It's not so early that she'd resent being woken up if she's still in bed but it's not so late that she can't make plans to meet Charisma if she wants to do so." Indi met Esmeralda's eyes. "Would you like to listen in?"

"If you wouldn't mind, yes. I'd like to hear her reaction and her tone as much as what's being said. Sometimes those are more telling than the actual words that are being used." Esmeralda looked around the table. "Thank you, ladies. I know this mission has gone well beyond the scope of anything we've ever done before. Just keep me posted as things happen - I'd hate to be caught unaware if we were suddenly called home."

"Do you think you'll get called, Es?" Ruby asked.

Esmeralda shrugged. "I dunno - I've learned not to try and second-guess Him. But I'd like to be prepared... just in case."

"I don't blame you there," Ruby replied with a smile. "There's nothing worse than being blindsided by something." She turned to Amber. "I'm sorry about earlier. I know you usually function as Es' second, but I... I guess I'm still in mothering mode."

Amber's lips twitched and she wrapped an arm around Ruby's shoulders. "You're *always* in mothering mode, Ruby - it's what you do. That's not a bad thing. Heaven knows we all need it from time to time, and it's probably a big part of what helped Es get back on her feet. We're square, okay?"

"Okay."

"Now that *that's* all settled, I think we all have things to take care of. I'm going to wake up Saphira; Indi, I'll meet you back here just before nine." Without another word, Esmeralda stood and went to the sink to rinse out her coffee cup. Then she moved back to the bedroom and entered it without a backwards glance, closing the door firmly behind her.

Everyone waited until the door was shut, then they moved off to get their day started.

************

"Problems?" Saphira mumbled from her spot with her face still half-buried in her pillow. Esmeralda shook her head and crossed to the bed, crawling to lean against the headboard as she sat beside Saphira. Saphira immediately took advantage and slid her head from the pillow to Esmeralda's lap, sighing in contentment when Esmeralda' started combing her hands through long, dark locks. Saphira purred and Esmeralda gazed down on her fondly.

"Comfortable?" she asked with an indulgent smile.

"Perfect," Saphira rumbled. "No place else I'd rather be," squeezing the thigh her arm was wrapped around before allowing her fingertips to stroke the smooth skin beneath them. "So... problems?" she asked again.

"Progress, actually," Esmeralda replied wryly. "Charisma finally read Brianna's letters."

Saphira went perfectly still for a long moment before she turned enough to look up into Esmeralda's eyes. "Did she?" waiting for Esmeralda to nod. "And...? C'mon, Es... that might be considered progress, but I can't believe that's all that happened."

Esmeralda chuckled and ruffled Saphira's bangs, pushing them out of her eyes. "Actually, that's significant progress, all things considered. Baby steps, remember? But Charisma came to some sort of decision - she had Ame call Opal to set up lunch with Brianna." Esmeralda held up her hand. "All we know is that it's for personal reasons and Charisma deemed it urgent."

"And Brianna?"

"Indi hasn't called her yet. It's still early."

"But if it's urgent...?"

"I think Brianna's definition of urgent is going to differ greatly from Charisma's. Besides, if it was truly urgent, Charisma would have called Brianna directly... or gone to see her. She wouldn't be trying to set up lunch."

"Do you think Brianna will be receptive?"

Esmeralda shrugged. "It's hard to say at this point. If this had happened even a week or two ago, I would have said absolutely. Now?" She shrugged again and absently began combing her fingers through Saphira's hair once more. "I think she's pulled away sufficiently to allow her to begin rebuilding the defenses she set up against Charisma so long ago. Only this time, I'm not sure she'll let them come down... even if it's Charisma doing the breaking."

Saphira held Esmeralda's eyes for another long moment, but instead of making a smart remark, she simply closed her eyes and rolled back over, butting her head against Esmeralda's stomach until she felt the light scraping of fingernails against her scalp. Saphira brushed her lips over Esmeralda's thigh. "I hope they figure it out. I can't imagine choosing to be without you."

"Neither can I," Esmeralda whispered. Then there was no more talking as they simply absorbed the peace surrounding them, appreciating the fact that they were alone together. Both knew their day would have to start for real very soon and that circumstance would change, so they enjoyed it while they could.

Sure enough, sometime later a knock sounded at the door and Esmeralda blinked open eyes that had unexpectedly closed in sleep during their peaceful interlude. She shifted when she felt Saphira do the same, biting her lip to keep from giggling. Saphira turned her head and frowned.

"You were tickling me," Esmeralda replied to the unspoken question. Saphira grinned evilly and returned her head to its previous position, this time deliberately using her eyes and lips to good effect. Esmeralda jumped and swatted at her just as a second knock sounded at the door. "Be good!" Esmeralda hissed with a gentle swat on Saphira's hip. Saphira just huffed and scowled, crossing her arms over her chest but refusing to move from her current position.

"Es? It's Indi. Um... it's nine o'clock and I was about to call Brianna."

"Give me five minutes, Indi, and I'll be right out." Indi could hear scrambling from the bed and a muffled squeal from Esmeralda. She bit her lips to keep from laughing aloud, then cleared her throat.

"I'll be in the living room, Es. Take your time."

Esmeralda glared at Saphira, who leaned back into the pillows with a smug grin on her face. "We will finish what you started later. I've got work to do."

Saphira reached for Esmeralda and pulled her onto the bed before Esmeralda could dart away. Without hesitation, Saphira claimed Esmeralda's lips for a long, passionate moment before she eased back enough for them both to breathe. "I love you, Es. Never forget that."

Esmeralda's gaze softened and she offered Saphira a tender smile. "I love you too, Phira... so much."

Saphira stole another kiss, then patted Esmeralda on the behind. "All right - you've got work to do, and I'm pretty sure there are things I need to take care of as well. Meet you back here later?"

Esmeralda grinned. "You've got yourself a date, lover."

Saphira growled and Esmeralda laughed aloud. Their day was off to a fabulous start.

************

"Senator Walker, this is Indi. I'm sorry to bother you at home on your day off, but I received a call from Senator Tagherty's PA earlier. Senator Tagherty would like to set up a luncheon meeting with you at your earliest possible convenience."

Brianna rubbed her eyes and sighed. Though she hadn't been asleep when the phone rang, she hadn't been awake for very long either - she hadn't even had her first cup of coffee, which was just finishing up its brewing cycle. She stretched and rose, shuffling slowly to the coffeepot, then reached for a cup and poured her first cup of the day. All this was done in silence while she thought over Indi's words, and she waited until she had her coffee prepared and had downed her first swallow before she deigned to reply. Indi, who could hear all the noise in the background, simply waited for Brianna to decide she was ready to answer.

"Did she tell you what it was about, Indi?" Brianna asked, closing her eyes and she savored the next bit of coffee.

"No ma'am - only that it was personal and that it was urgent."

Brianna sighed again. If it had been urgent, Charisma would have taken care of this directly... personally. As it was....

"Okay, here's what I want you to do. When you call Charisma's assistant back, you tell her you were unable to reach me today. Then set up a meeting between us for tomorrow some time. It doesn't have to be lunch, but it can be if that's what's available. If tomorrow doesn't work, try for later this week."

"Yes ma'am."

"Thanks, Indi."

"Not a problem, Senator. It's my job, after all."

"Yeah, maybe, but what time did your phone ring this morning?" Brianna asked with a lilt in her voice. Indigo cleared her throat.

"Let's just say it was dark and I was still sleeping."

Brianna laughed briefly, then covered her mouth with her hand. "I'm sorry, Indi. It's really not funny, but it *is* very typical of the woman I remember Charisma Tagherty to be. Thank you for waiting to call me."

"Yes ma'am. Would you like me to call you back with the details, or should I just let you know when I see you in the morning?"

"Unless it's a breakfast meeting, just give me the details when I see you in the office tomorrow."

"Will do, Senator. Is there anything else I can do for you today?"

"Yes - go do something fun, will you? I'll see you tomorrow, Indi."

"Goodbye, Senator Walker."

"Bye, Indi."

The line went dead and Indi and Esmeralda looked at one another, then turned their attention to Opal who had been waiting in the room with them expectantly. Now she had to call Charisma and break the news to her. She picked up her phone and dialed, then pressed speaker so they could all hear. Then it was simply a matter of waiting for Charisma to pick it up.

Chapter LXXXIV

Charisma came down the stairs putting her earrings on, nearly dropping one of the studs when Kent stepped from the kitchen. She hesitated and frowned. "Kent? What are you doing here? Where's Ame?"

Kent's eyebrows flew into his hairline - Charisma's tone wasn't accusatory, but it was honestly confused. He looked at her carefully and recognized that she was dressed for work and not a casual Sunday at home. "Charisma, it's Sunday. I came down so we could work out a visitation schedule and to take Adam to the Natural History Museum. I sent Ame home when I got here - she said you had a late night. It's why Adam and I haven't left yet."

"It's Sunday?" looking down at herself with a frown.

"Yes, Charisma," Kent offered with a smirk. "I'm not sure how you lost a day - especially one where you don't have to go into work, but...." His voice trailed off and he looked at her closer. "Are you okay, Charisma?"

Charisma pinched the bridge of her nose. "Yeah... I think so. I'm not sure how...." She took a deep breath and met Kent's eyes. "Are you in a hurry?"

He motioned her back up the stairs. "Go change into your Sunday 'relaxing-around-the-house' clothes. We have plenty of time. Adam should be up from his nap in a few minutes."

"Nap?"

Kent chuckled. "We ate brunch, so I decided to let him catch a few zzz's while we waited for you. Maybe we'll actually get to go through the museum today."

Charisma smiled. "You're really excited about this aren't you?"

Kent blushed but held her eyes with his when he nodded. "I am. No matter what you decide about us, Charisma, Adam is a blessing that we will always share. I will never regret our decision to be a couple if only for his sake."

"Neither will I," she agreed, then turned and went upstairs without another word.

************

"MA!" Adam greeted some minutes later when Charisma returned downstairs and joined the rest of her family in the den. He scrambled off of Kent's lap and ran to wrap his arms around Charisma's legs, knowing she would lift him into her arms. He brushed their noses together with a laugh, then threw his arms around her neck. "Love Mama!"

Charisma held Adam to her and kissed his head. "I love you too, son." She loosened her grip and Adam squirmed to get down. Charisma rolled her eyes but released him and Adam ran to the table and picked up a pamphlet. "Look, Mama - 'saurs!"

She took the brochure from Adam's hand and realized it was for the Natural History Museum. "Dinosaurs, huh?" grinning when he nodded enthusiastically. "You ready to go see some dinosaurs with Daddy?"

"YES!!"

Charisma's eyes twinkled and when she looked at Kent, she saw the same expression on his face. "Well then... let's go get your coat on so you can go see some dinosaurs with Daddy. It's still winter and just because it's not freezing at the moment doesn't mean that won't change and change again before you boys are done today."

"Mama come?"

"Not today, Sweetie. Today is just for you and Daddy."

"You're welcome to...." Kent started then trailed off when Charisma adamantly shook her head.

"No. You said it yourself - if we're going to do this... be separated, we need to do this right from the beginning. Besides, you need some time with Adam and I'm waiting on a phone call," her eyes skittering away from his at the last. Kent cocked an eyebrow.

"Oh? Anyone I know?" he asked with an understanding smile.

Charisma shrugged. "I'm hoping to have lunch with Brianna, but...." The phone rang at that moment and Charisma looked at the display with a frown. "Excuse me." Kent nodded though she was already moving away from him. He watched her go, then extended his hand to Adam.

"C'mon Boy... let's go get your coat and go see some dinosaurs."

"And Br'anna?" Adam asked guilelessly.

Kent looked in Charisma's direction. "I don't know about that, Son. I don't know if Brianna will be at the Mall today. But we'll go see the dinosaurs - that'll be fun, right?"

"YES!" Adam declared vehemently, then he took Kent's proffered hand and together they headed upstairs to Adam's room. Kent chanced to look back just as they reached the landing, and saw Charisma's shoulders slump slightly before she straightened and nodded. When she hung up the phone, she went into her office without a backwards glance and Kent and Adam continued on to Adam's room.

Within minutes Adam was kitted out and ready to go, and he dashed down the stairs to find Charisma. Kent followed at a much more leisurely pace, not surprised to see Charisma step from her office and close the door behind her before Adam reached her.

She reached down and lifted him off the ground with a groan. "You're soon going to be too big for Mama to pick you up like this anymore, Son. You go have a good time with Daddy, and I'll see you boys later, all right?"

Adam hugged her tightly, then used her body as a catapult to launch himself in Kent's direction. Only good reflexes kept it from being a disaster, and Kent scooped Adam out of mid-air even as Charisma tried to catch her breath. Kent turned concerned eyes on her.

"You all right?"

She grimaced and nodded. "It's been a while since he stepped there; I think he was still on the inside then and he wasn't quite as heavy as he is now. You boys go have a good time; I'll be here when you get ho... back."

"I take it lunch is a no-go then," Kent spoke as he set Adam down to retrieve his outerwear.

"You'd be right," Charisma replied, not meeting his eyes.

"Pa?"

"I need to get ready, Boy, then we'll go all right? I need to put on my coat and things so we match."

"Kay." Kent looked back at Charisma, and noted her attention was focused on Adam. Kent finished adjusting his coat over his body and flattened his collar, then stepped into Charisma's personal space and lifted her chin.

"You wanna talk about it?"

Charisma shook her head emphatically, driving him to free her chin from his grasp. "No! That would just be... weird. I can't talk to you about this."

He buttoned his coat and pulled a hat from his pocket, pulling it low over his ears, but not so low as to inhibit conversation.

"Why?" He held up his hand to keep her from answering. "Charisma, we were friends first and you are still one of my very best friends, remember? Friends are there for each other and I don't think there are going to be many other people you can really talk to about this - not that will try to understand and support you. I mean, there's Brianna of course, but I don't think it's a good idea to talk to her until you've got things clear in your own heart and mind. There's Okasa, but that could get awkward considering she loves you both like her own. I suppose you could talk to your friend Esmeralda - she does have the advantage of being a lesbian in a long-term relationship. I don't really know her well enough to know if she could offer the kind of support you need though. We won't even go into your political colleagues and acquaintances," smirking when Charisma shivered delicately. "So as I see it, I'm your best bet." He paused when a flash of honest confusion washed over Charisma features.

"Why? Why would you want her to take your place?"

This time he took her face in both hands and forced her to look at him when he spoke. He wanted her to see his sincerity and to know he meant what he was saying. He also wanted her to recognize the truth of his words.

"Charisma, Brianna Walker will never take my place. For years she's had a place in your heart and your mind that I will never touch - she doesn't need mine. So when you get ready to talk and you need someone to talk to, call me. I'll be there for you."

"Why?" she asked again.

"Because you deserve to find real happiness, and you need Brianna Walker to do that."

Kent leaned forward and brushed a kiss over Charisma's forehead, noting her stiffening that melted almost immediately. She covered the hands that cupped her face and pressed them with her fingers gently before releasing it and stepping through the kitchen towards the back door. Kent took her cue and turned to the alarm, keying in the code, then nodding at her. She opened the door, and Kent grasped Adam's hand and together they walked to the SUV. Kent got Adam secured into his car seat, then he pulled out of the garage as they headed out to hunt dinosaurs. Adam turned and waved, and Charisma stood at the door and waved back. Kent just gave her a crooked smile, and it reminded her why she'd married him.

She waited until Kent closed the garage door behind them, then she shut the door and moved back towards her study. It was going to be a long day.

************

One of the nicest things about having a politically-minded wife, Kent Rockwell decided, was having access to a parking garage within the city limits of Washington, D.C. proper. He pulled the SUV into Charisma's space, then removed Adam from all the belts and buckles holding him fast in his car seat. Adam knew to wait for Kent, so he clutched Kent's pant leg until he could take his daddy's hand. Then together they crossed the garage to the elevator and headed out towards the Mall.

The day was cold, but not biting and it was a nice walk across the street to the Mall. Adam held Kent's hand tightly and looked around with wide eyes.

"Br'anna?" he finally asked, recognizing the place where they'd run into her the week before. Kent looked around carefully and shook his head.

"I don't see her, Boy," his shoulders dropping just the least bit. He'd been hoping for luck today - he wanted to talk to her and Kent had the distinct feeling that Adam's presence might be the icebreaker they needed. Still, he wasn't going to go traipsing through the National Gallery looking for her. If he was to stumble upon her here, it was going to have to happen like it did before. Otherwise, he would make it a point to seek her out privately... either at her apartment or in her Senate office.

Kent looked down at Adam. "C'mon, Son." He pointed to another museum down from the gallery. "That's where we're going. That's where the dinosaurs are." Adam grinned and started tugging on Kent's hand, laughing infectiously when Kent scooped him up and spun them around. Then Kent set Adam back on his feet and they raced off across the Mall for the museum.

************

Brianna stood on the steps of the National Gallery, hidden behind a column but still able to see the tableau taking place just below her. She smiled wistfully at the happiness she was witnessing. Then she turned her back and made her way into the gallery itself. Maybe a few more minutes spent looking at Diana would restore a measure of her peace.

************

Charisma seated herself at her desk and pulled her work forward, determined to get something productive done while she waited for Kent and Adam to return from their outing. She assumed it wouldn't be a problem - many were the Sundays when she'd buried herself in her study to work while Kent and Adam were elsewhere. But today she couldn't seem to settle down and concentrate on much of anything. She blew out an impatient breath when she realized she'd checked the clock six times in five minutes.

With a frustrated sigh, Charisma pushed the papers away from her and stood, crossing to the window to stare sightlessly across the yard that still held snow in the shady spots. She glanced at the clock again - despite what Kent had implied earlier, there was actually something she could talk to Okasa about regarding the whole situation. She just had to wait until her parents were back from Mass.

Thankfully, they tended to go to early service, which meant they should be home shortly. Patrick and Okasa always went out to brunch with friends after church, but they were still usually home in the very earliest part of the afternoon.

Charisma decided to go fix herself a cup of coffee to pass a bit of time, and when she returned to her office, she decided to chance a phone call.

The phone rang three times before it was answered and when it was picked up, Patrick was on the other end. "Hello?"

"Hi Daddy."

"Hi Princess," he replied and Charisma could hear the smile in his voice. "How's my baby girl today?" Patrick wondered what was going on. Charisma never called at this time of day... even on Sunday - she was always working.

"Not much. Kent took Adam to the Natural History Museum a little while ago."

"That's nice," wondering any number of things, but mostly why Charisma was indulging in small talk. "Is everything okay, Charisma?"

"Yes, Daddy. I just... is Mama there?"

"She's getting changed out of her Sunday clothes. Hang on a second."

Charisma could hear the rustle of material as Patrick moved, and then there was a low murmur of voices. It seemed like only a minute passed before Okasa spoke into the receiver. "Charisma? What's wrong, Baby Girl?"

Charisma took a deep breath, and Okasa waited patiently. They had a fairly regular schedule that they followed and had for years - it meant they knew when to expect visits and phone calls so they could plan accordingly. So for Charisma to call unexpectedly out of the blue meant something was up.

Okasa suddenly realized that had happened... especially the phone calls... with much greater frequency since Brianna had crashed back into Charisma's life, and she wondered fleetingly if that was what this was about as well. Then Charisma was speaking and she didn't have time to wonder anything except how honest to be.

"Mama, how did you respond when Brianna told you how she felt... about me, I mean?"

There was silence for a moment while Okasa considered her answer. "She never told me, Charisma. I knew. Just as I knew...." Okasa trailed off, not willing to start down that road with Charisma... especially over the phone.

"You knew what, Mama?"

"I knew that Brianna loved you, Charisma."

"That wasn't what you were going to say, Mama," Charisma accused but Okasa remained silent, waiting for Charisma to pursue that line of thought. Instead, Charisma took a deep breath. "Tell me what your reaction was when you discovered Brianna was in love with me?"

"What do you want to know, Charisma? I had a long time to understand what was happening - I watched it take place in front of me over the course of years. It didn't change how I felt about either of you - you're still my children... both of you."

"And how did you reconcile that with the teachings of the Church?"

Okasa blinked. Whatever she'd expected, this hadn't been on the list of possibilities. She was well aware that Charisma only attended church with the family when she was home because it was expected of her. But Okasa didn't know what Charisma really believed or what had turned her away from the Church in the first place. Okasa bit her lips as she considered her words carefully.

"Over the years, there has been more than one occasion when the Church's doctrine and my personal faith haven't meshed for any number of reasons. This would be one of those instances. I cannot believe that the God who loved the world so much He gave His Son for it would condemn love of any kind. Do you remember your Catechism - I Corinthians thirteen?"

"The love chapter," Charisma whispered.

"Yes... the love chapter. Love never fails - so the Church and I go our separate ways on this issue. For me it's a matter of faith... what I believe in my heart."

"And it never bothered you that Brianna was a woman?"

"I never quite understood the desire to be with another woman that way myself. But did it bother me?" Okasa pinched her lip between her fingers while she pondered Charisma's question. "No... I can honestly say it didn't bother me. I know Brianna's heart - she is a wonderful, caring human being. And frankly speaking, she's a beautiful woman. What's not to love?"

Charisma smiled at the truth of her mother's words, then the smile faded and her expression grew pensive. The silence grew so large Okasa was finally compelled to break it.

"Charisma? Are you still there, Daughter?"

"When did you know about me, Mama?" the query so quiet that Okasa had to strain to make out the words.

"Oh, Sweetheart - I told you... I watched it happen over the course of years. I don't know if I could pinpoint a moment when I realized just exactly what Brianna was to you. But I knew Brianna was someone special to you the first time you brought her home. Paddy had told me about her when he got back from the university, and I honestly couldn't wait to meet her."

"Mama, I wasn't in love with Brianna when I brought her home with me the first time. I just... I just couldn't leave her to fend for herself... not after I met her parents," cringing at the memory her words conjured. "She deserved better than them for a family, and I knew that we could give that to her."
"When did you realize you were in love with Brianna, Daughter?"

"I don't... I'm not...."

"Charisma... take a deep breath and let it out slowly. The only one who refuses to see or acknowledge who and what Brianna Walker is to you is you."

"Mama, it's not that simple."

"Sweetheart, you're the one making it hard. Maybe you should sit down and figure out what is important to you."

"What about Kent... and Adam?"

"Sweetheart, we love Kent and he will always be a part of this family no matter what - just like Brianna has always been. I have a feeling when you figure out what is best and right for you, everything else will fall into place... for them and for you."

Silence as Charisma absorbed Okasa's words. Then, "I need to go, Mama. I love you."

"We love you, Charisma. That will never change."

The sound of a dial tone was Charisma's only response. Okasa turned to Patrick who had been standing close enough to overhear the entire conversation. "You think...?"

"I can only hope."



Chapter LXXXV

Charisma sat at her desk the following morning... eyes focused on the work she had to do while her mind remained on the events of the previous day. Opal had informed her that Brianna's personal assistant had returned her call with the news that Brianna was apparently incommunicado, but that they had scheduled lunch for the two of them the following afternoon. Though disheartening, it hadn't been an outright refusal, and that has spurred her into making the phone call to speak to Okasa.

And hadn't *that* been quite the eye opener?? It had also been most distracting, and Charisma had been hard-pressed to get her mind back on track by the time Kent and Adam had returned from the museum. She smiled wistfully - that had been very entertaining, as Adam had felt the need to recount every single moment of his experience.

Like a wind-up toy, though, the moment he'd wound down, Adam crashed and was tucked into bed to sleep the night away. Only once that was done did they sit down and work out a schedule between them. Then Charisma gave Kent back the signed papers, and he looked his question at her. Because while he'd absolutely expected her to sign them eventually, Kent hadn't actually expected eventually to be as quick as this. Charisma had clasped her hands together tightly and kept her eyes focused on them as they rested in her lap. She sighed.

"I think it's for the best... for now," she'd elaborated, not meeting his eyes. "I do love you, Kent, but you're right - I'm not in love with you, and you shouldn't be held back from finding the happiness you deserve because I can't seem to get my act together. This will give you the legal right to start looking without either of us having to worry about the ramifications of infidelity. And it will force me to really examine my life... decide what I want out of it and how best to go about it."

"You've given this some serious thought," he replied as he tucked the papers into his coat pocket.

"I have," Charisma had agreed without hesitation. "It's about all I've thought of this week when I haven't been worried out of my mind about criminals trying to mug my friends. But please don't tell my constituents," she'd added with a hint of a smile.

"Scout's honor," Kent had replied with a grin, holding up three fingers. Then his expression turned serious. "I want you to know that I won't do anything to embarrass you, Charisma. So even if I find someone else to share happiness with, I won't bring it into our home. You'll know first, and then we'll go from there."

Charisma hadn't answered, simply nodded her head, and Kent gave her a brief embrace and brushed her cheek with his lips before he'd left without another word.

Now Charisma sat staring at the documents on her desk, not seeing them. She wondered what she had done to have found a man like Kent. With almost anyone else, there would have been fights and recriminations and scandal. Instead, there was kindness and understanding and thoughtfulness.

A knock on her door brought her out of her brown study, and Charisma jerked to attention and straightened the various bits of legislation on her desk before she slipped her glasses from her face and placed them on the pile. Then she called out, "Come in."

"Senator Tagherty?" Opal greeted as she stepped into the inner sanctum. "Senator Maxwell is here to see you."

"Thank you, Opal. Please show her in. And will you please confirm lunch with Senator Walker and my two o'clock with Senator Phillips?"

"Yes ma'am," opening the door wider for Laura Maxwell to enter Charisma's office. Laura waited for Opal to shut the door behind her before she peered at Charisma through narrowed eyes. Charisma returned the look with an arched eyebrow and Laura smirked before taking the proffered seat in front of Charisma's desk.

"For someone who's doddering, you're looking quite well, my dear," Laura greeted with a smirk.

Both eyebrows shot into Charisma's dark hairline. "Excuse me?"

Laura snorted. "Scott Patterson is making loud noises about becoming the chair of your committee."

"Excuse me?" Charisma leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest. "Why? It's not like it's a major committee. And how is it I'm just now hearing about this?"

"Because it's something he doesn't have and it took it this long to make it to me," Laura replied. "Besides, it's more of the same for most of us as far as he's concerned - not worth noticing. Especially for someone like you, Chari - you're as untouchable as anyone I've ever seen."

"And if I wasn't?" Seeing the confusion in Laura's eyes, Charisma sighed and elaborated. "If I wasn't untouchable... if I wasn't squeaky clean - what would happen then, Laura? Would Scott Patterson be noticeable then? Would I still enjoy the backing I have now?"

Laura frowned. "Stop talking in riddles, Charisma and spill."

Charisma uncrossed her arms and folded her hands on her desk. "Kent and I are legally separated.
He filed for separation several weeks ago - I signed the papers yesterday."

"What? Why?"

"Let's just say he had his reasons and I agreed."

"Is it anything that could be detrimental to you as a candidate?"

Charisma gave Laura a droll look. "Is there anything that couldn't be twisted in one fashion or another to make it a detriment, Laura? The real question is do I care of it does."

"And do you?"

"I don't think so," Charisma replied slowly. "It's nothing I would be ashamed of if it came out, but not something I want to share with the rest of the world, either."

"Charisma - you know nothing stays private in the world of politics for long. If you want this to work out in your favor, then you need to make a choice to share it with the world sooner rather than later. I'm not saying it would be career suicide to let someone else break the story, but your hopes for the White House will pretty much go up in smoke. If you get ahead of the curve, however...." Laura shrugged her shoulders and let the silence speak for her.

"So you think my constituents will be more forgiving of a perceived lapse in family values if I am upfront and honest about it?"

"I think your record will speak for itself and putting the news out there yourself means you're willing to accept responsibility for your mistakes."

"And if I don't believe it's a mistake?"

"The public doesn't have to know that." The pause that followed was thoughtful, and Laura watched Charisma as she considered the words that had been spoken. Finally, Charisma bridged the silence.

"Aren't you going to ask me what Kent's reasons were?"

"Why? They have no bearing on the strategy you need to overcome them and put them behind you."

"How can you know that if you don't know what they are?"

"Because with the right people in your corner, anything can be spun to make you out to be a hero... or a paragon... or the wronged party - whatever it takes to keep you in office."

"You really think it's that easy?"

"It can be - it just depends on how we spin it. As interesting as all this is, however, it's not the reason I'm here. Let's get down to work. We can come back to this later."

"Or never," Charisma offered with a fake smile of interest. Laura just raised an eyebrow.

"Oh no - we're going to come back to this. We're not losing a strong, viable candidate to bad politics." Laura gave Charisma a sharp look. "We're too close to making this dream a reality."

Charisma had to wonder just when her dreams had changed.

************

Brianna looked at her daily schedule and sighed again when she saw that it was time for her to head to the dining room to meet Charisma for lunch. Yesterday this had seemed like a much better idea - and while she still took comfort in the fact that they would be in a professional setting surrounded by their colleagues, she still felt a twinge of distress at meeting with Charisma at all.

Still, Indi had followed her directives to the letter, so with a hint of trepidation stirring in her belly, Brianna rose from behind her desk, and readied herself for luncheon with Charisma. Besides, she reminded herself firmly, it wasn't anything I hadn't already determined to do before I came to this God-forsaken place, with a grim smile on her lips. Of course, that had been before the up and down debacle that renewing her acquaintance with Charisma had become.

However, she had determined this course when she accepted the appointment, so Brianna straightened her shoulders and exited into the public area of her office. Her staff looked up briefly, then most returned to the work they had in front of them. Only Indi stood and accompanied Brianna to the door, waiting for instructions.

"I should be back shortly," Brianna said. "What's on tap after lunch?"

"You have a committee meeting at one-thirty and another at four. And Senator Maxwell has asked for a few minutes of your time as has Senator Patterson."

Brianna grimaced. Though she'd been introduced to Laura Maxwell, she really didn't know her particularly well. However, she had no real reason to turn down her request, and it never hurt to know people. Scott Patterson, on the other hand - he was becoming a thorn in her side and Brianna was loathe to give him the time of day, much less anything of substance.

"Tell Senator Patterson my schedule is full today, but if he'd like to meet me in the dining room when lunch is over, I can give him a few minutes on my way back from there. As for Senator Maxwell, see if she's available to meet after my second committee meeting. I'd like to actually have time to offer her a drink."

"Will do, Senator," Indi said. "Enjoy your lunch."

Brianna rolled her eyes and smirked, but Indi could see the hesitation in her eyes. But before she could comment, Brianna opened the door and headed out towards the Senate Dining Room.

Charisma was walking down the hallway ahead of Brianna, and she didn't slow down or turn around when she heard the door close behind her. Instead, she continued down the hall, almost slumping in relief when Brianna called out to her. Turning, she stopped and waited for Brianna to join her.

"How are you?" Brianna asked casually, and Charisma could have cried at the awkwardness that was so thick between them. She took a deep breath and shrugged.

"I'm not sure, honestly. Ask me again sometime - maybe I'll have an answer by then."

Brianna's brow furrowed. Despite everything - despite herself - it hurt to hear the lost tone in Charisma's voice. She wondered what had happened... besides the obvious that she had been a part of... to have beaten Charisma until she admitted defeat, even in the tenor of her voice.

"Is everything all right?"

Charisma sighed. She supposed it would be better to tell Brianna herself than having her find out through the grapevine or worse - though Charisma knew from experience that the grapevine could be bad enough. Still.... "Kent and I have separated."

Brianna blinked. Of all the things she'd expected Charisma to say, that hadn't even been a consideration. "I'm sorry?" she replied. At that moment, they reached the maître d stand and were shown their table without delay. Only when they were seated and their orders given to the server did Charisma resume their conversation.

"Were you asking me or telling me?" Charisma asked drolly. Brianna scowled, having already put her response out of her mind as she wondered what had happened to cause Charisma and Kent to split... even if it was only separation and not divorce. Charisma smirked at Brianna's lost expression. "You said you were sorry, but it sounded more like a question than a statement."

"Oh." Brianna bit her lips and thought about her response. "I guess a little bit of both. I am sorry about your separation - unless it's something you wanted?"

"I didn't ask for it, but I can't disagree with Kent's reasons for wanting one."

"And is that why you wanted to meet for lunch - to tell me about your separation from your husband?" Brianna's confusion was self-evident.

"Not at all - it just occurred to me as we walked over that you deserved to know the truth before it goes viral so to speak, and I wanted to be the one to tell you. I know what happens to the truth when it comes through the grapevine around here and eventually, this will make its way through the grapevine. The Senate is filled with a bunch of nosy old hens and it's a wonder they can get any work done with the amount of time they spend gossiping with each other."

"Bitter experience?"

"Something like that," Charisma replied with a grimace. "Maybe I'll tell you about it some day."

"Sounds like something that might have to be put in that tell-all book," Brianna said with a wry twinkle in her eyes.

Charisma snorted. "People would never believe most of it wasn't made up out of whole cloth."

"Yeah... there does seem to be an abundance of BS around here."

"Too bad it's not as useful as real cow manure - at least *that* serves a purpose."

Brianna laughed, startling a smile out of Charisma. She covered her mouth when she realized she was attracting attention. "I'm sorry, but that was funny."

"And unfortunately true."

Brianna waited for the server to put their plates in front of them before she looked at Charisma again. "So what did you need to discuss, Charisma? From what Indi told me, you felt it was urgent."

"Why am I not surprised to see the two of you having lunch together?" Senator Patterson commented loudly as he approached the table they were seated at. "I was going to see if you'd be willing to make our appointment a working lunch, but obviously I'm too late. When you finish your business with Senator Tagherty, please feel free to join me." Before either Charisma or Brianna could comment, he sketched a slight bow in their direction and moved to his own table. They watched him go and then exchanged glances.

"Would you rather...?"

"NO! No," a little less forcefully, lowering her volume as well. "As awkward and uncomfortable as this is," motioning between them, "it's not painful. If I have to sit through a meal, things are liable to turn painful... for him." Brianna smirked at Charisma's raised eyebrow. "You know how I feel about politics," waiting for Charisma to nod. Brianna jerked her head in Patterson's direction. "He refuses to understand that. And if he continues to try and schmooze me, bad things are going to happen." She stabbed her fork into her food and began to eat. Charisma raised her eyebrows, but attacked her food with far less vigor.

"Fair enough; he's managed to piss off a better part of his colleagues in the Senate - why not you?"

"Why me? Even if I was *interested* in politics, I am the absolute most junior individual here. The only reason I'm on the committees I am is because of Richard Whitman's seniority status. Even if I was to run for re-election, I wouldn't be on those same committees when I came up for assignment."

"He's trying to bring you onto his side."

"He's a moron, and I don't have time for morons." Brianna focused on her plate for a long moment, chewing slowly as she brought her breathing under control. Finally she looked back at Charisma. "Sorry... I must be PMSing." She blew out an impatient breath. "You want to tell me what was so urgent that we needed to have lunch together?"

Charisma frowned, wondering what had happened to change Brianna's attitude. On the other hand, she'd gotten more friendliness than she'd expected. She pushed her plate away and took a deep breath before speaking.

"First of all, I want you to know that this is coming from me - not Mama, not Paddy and not the boys. They don't know anything about this."

Brianna's eyes widened, but all she said was, "Okay." She nodded her understanding.

Charisma nodded as well. "Good," breathing deeply. "I would like you to reconsider your decision to cut yourself off from the family... or to keep the family out of your life." She held up her hand before Brianna could say anything. "Let me finish please," waiting for Brianna to nod. "My family... our family...." motioning between them. "My family *is* your family, Brianna - don't pull away from them because of me. None of you deserve to suffer through a separation like that."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why would you do this? Why would you care?"

"I know what it's like to not have you in my life - I don't want my family to have to learn that lesson... especially because of me. You've always been a part of them... even when I didn't know it. That shouldn't have to change because of my issues." She paused and Brianna continued to wait, wanting Charisma to have her full say before she spoke. Eventually, Charisma looked up from the table and met Brianna's eyes again.

"This is going to sound... hokey, for lack of a better word. Mama understands - she understands better than I do actually. She's hurt and upset about it, but she understands and she'd never do anything to change your mind. In fact, if she finds out about this conversation, I'm liable to be in for a dressing down of epic proportions." Brianna snickered and Charisma gave her a wry smile. "You know it's true."

Brianna nodded her head in concession. "I'm not sure I think that sounds hokey though."

"I'm not to the hokey part yet."

"Oh," motioning for Charisma to continue.

"So Mama understands and I'm sure she's made sure Daddy and the boys understand too. I know they're not happy about it, and Kay is simply furious, but they're all adults and they 'get it' even if they don't like it. The kids on the other hand... Brianna, you've been part of their lives since before they were born. How do you think they feel about the fact that you've simply disappeared from their lives?" She paused to clear her throat. "Even my son - Adam has only known you very briefly... just a few short months. And already he thinks the sun rises and sets with you. When he and Kent ran into you the other day outside the Gallery, I heard about it for days. And when they went to the Natural History Museum, all he could talk about was getting the chance to see you again."

Brianna pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger and sighed. "Charisma, what's your point?"

"My point," Charisma replied with a hint of impatience, "is that if you mean so much to my son, who has only known you for a few months of his life, how much more do you mean to our nieces and nephews who have grown up with you and known you their whole lives? I understand why you feel the need to separate yourself from me, and by extension, the family. I am asking you to reconsider the family part of the equation. They don't deserve to be abandoned by you in your effort to avoid me. You can continue to see them like you always did."

There was silence for a long moment. Brianna kept her eyes closed and the bridge of her nose pinched. Finally she rubbed her eyes and looked up at Charisma. "Is that it?"

"That's all I had to say, yes."

"Thank you for lunch then," Brianna said as she stood and pushed her chair in. "If it wasn't all pleasant, at least it wasn't all uncomfortable either. Give Adam a kiss for me and tell him...,." Brianna shook her head. "Nevermind - goodbye, Charisma."

Charisma was torn between the desire to follow Brianna and demand to know what she was going to say, and the need to keep the fragile truce they currently had in place between them. Before she could give either course of action much thought one way or the other, Scott Patterson had jumped up from his chair and had joined Brianna in exiting the dining hall. Charisma sighed. She'd done the best she knew to do - the rest was up to Brianna.



Chapter LXXXVI

"Brianna?" Esmeralda asked as she poked her head into the inner office. "Is everything all right?"

Brianna glanced back at Esmeralda just briefly before she returned her attention to darkness of the world outside her window. "Are you a native of this area, Esmeralda?"

Esmeralda frowned, but shook her head. "No. Saphira and I had a friend who was in trouble, so we moved here to help out. But we've been here for a while - why do you ask?"

"What did you think of this place when you first moved here? Were you in awe of its beauty or were you mostly disgusted by the waste? Did you like it or was it barely tolerable? And has your opinion changed the longer you've lived here?"

All Brianna's questions were asked while she still faced the window and Esmeralda studied her stiffened back. She began cleaning and Brianna continued to face the window, knowing Esmeralda was considering her response. After some minutes had passed, Esmeralda took a deep breath to speak.

"Well, I can't say that we were thrilled to be here - except that our friend really did need us and we were able to find employment fairly easily. And we needed that after having given up everything to be together." She paused. "I do like the monuments and museums - they're nice to look at and it doesn't hurt that they are free as well," she added honestly.

"What else?"

"Don't take this the wrong way, because I really do enjoy my job, and I like the Senators I work for. But I don't like the game playing and I don't like the politics. There's too much self-interest here and the people who get hurt by it aren't the ones playing the games."

"What would you do if... if you hadn't come here to help your friend, where would you be? What would you be doing?"

Esmeralda actually stopped cleaning and scratched her head in thought. "I dunno - I never really gave it much deliberation. It wasn't how things panned out so...." She shrugged. "I really don't know."

Brianna turned from the window and uncrossed her arms as she moved behind her desk once more. She seated herself and folded her hands on the desk then stared at Esmeralda intently.

"I want you to think about it... really give it some consideration. If you and Saphira hadn't moved here to help your friend out, what would you have done instead?"

Esmeralda held Brianna's eyes for a long moment, then resumed her work. "What about you, Brianna?"

"Hmm? What about me?"

"Would you still be in the DA's office? You know it's just as political as Washington."

Briana chuckled. "Well, it certainly can be."

"Were you happy?"

"As the District Attorney?" shrugging when Esmeralda nodded. "It had its moments, but I was much happier as a prosecutor in the courtroom."

"Will you go back to it when you're done here?"

"I don't think so," Brianna replied, shaking her head. "I think I'm going to retire from public service and move into the private sector. Maybe I'll teach."

"Would you enjoy teaching?"

"Probably not as much as other things, but I think I'd do all right."

"I'm sure you would," Esmeralda offered with a smile. "You seem to be one of those lucky individuals who always tend to land on their feet."

"Better that than my ass," Brianna smirked. She watched as Esmeralda began to pack up her cart. "So still no answer for me?"

"Well, I really can't say for sure what we would have done. I think it would have depended on our opportunities. I probably would have ended up as a cashier at the local discount store because of my lack of education. But," she added, holding up her hands before Brianna could speak, "if we'd been given the chance, I think Saphira would have gone into law enforcement. Hunter wasn't that far off the mark where she's concerned."

"And you?"

"Me? I... I don't think I have any...."

"C'mon, Es," Brianna cut in. "You had to have wanted to do something when you were a kid - doctor, lawyer, Indian chief?" Esmeralda raised an eyebrow at the last and Brianna smirked in response. "Okay, maybe not the Indian chief. Teacher, writer, astronaut?"

"Now you're just being ridiculous," Esmeralda offered, but she gave Brianna a smile so she'd know there were no hard feelings. "I really didn't think about it much. My life was pretty well set from the time I was a child - I wanted to be Saphira's mate. Everything else?" She shook her head. "It is what it is, and I can't regret it as long as I have Saphira."


"I'm not sure I understand your thinking, Es, but as long as you're happy, I guess it's all good."

"It is," Esmeralda agreed. "What brought all this up anyway, if you don't mind my asking?"

Brianna turned her attention to her desk and started shutting things down and gathering things up in preparation of leaving for the night. "Any number of factors," she answered. "I'm sure you heard about my luncheon with Charisma today," looking up to see Esmeralda nod. "And I know you've heard about Scott Patterson's ambitions." Another nod. "Then we have Laura Maxwell who appears to be grooming Charisma for her run for the White House - I don't know really. It all just converged and got me to thinking."

"Does it bother you?"

"Excuse me? Does what bother me?" Brianna gathered her belongings and walked to the door. She opened it and motioned Esmeralda to go through ahead of her even as she waited for Esmeralda to clarify what she was asking. Esmeralda continued pushing her cart to the outer office door, leaning against it as she spoke.

"Charisma running for the White House? Or Laura Maxwell being the one to propel her there?"

"Es, Charisma Tagherty has had her eye on the Presidency for longer than either you or I have known her. She had already been working for it for years by the time that I met her. I can't really comment about Laura Maxwell - tonight was the first time I've exchanged more than passing platitudes with her. But if she's able to make Charisma's dream of being the first female President a reality, then I say more power to her. Maybe government would work better if it was run like a household instead of a country club."

"So you don't mind...?"

"Es, I appreciate that you understand the real situation between Charisma and me more than almost anyone else in the world. I love her... I always will. But you need to let go of the idea that I have any sort of undue influence on her actions or that whatever Charisma does has the least bit of impact on my life any more. I have, and that's not going to change."

"You really believe that? No matter what?"

Brianna motioned her to back up just slightly so she could get between the cart and the door. Then she pulled the door wide and waived Esmeralda out ahead of her.

"I know it to be true, Es. No matter what. I can't pretend anymore. Coming here taught me that."

Esmeralda shook her head slowly. "I'm sorry to hear that, Brianna - I truly am." She cleared her throat and looked back at Brianna who had started down the hall towards the elevator. "Goodnight, Senator Walker. Have a good evening."

Brianna turned and gave her a jaunty little wave. "You too, Es. I'll see you tomorrow."

Esmeralda continued back up the hall, wondering what Charisma thought of the whole situation, but a knock on her office door showed her to already be gone, so Esmeralda finished up her work so she could go talk to Saphira.

************

"How's it going, Joe?" Esmeralda asked when he poked his head into the window opening separating the kitchen from the counter.

"Can't complain, Essie. You're looking better."

She smiled. "I'm feeling better every day." She leaned against Saphira when she wrapped an arm around Esmeralda's waist from behind. "Hey, love."

Saphira gave her a light squeeze and brushed her lips across Esmeralda's cheek. Then she patted Esmeralda on the behind and nodded her head towards the counter stool. Esmeralda frowned at the lack of vocal response.

"Everything all right?" she asked quietly, catching Saphira's hand in her own. Joe peeked out from the opening again when Saphira padded into sight.

"She's all right, Es. Some kid clocked her across the throat earlier, and this is the first chance she's had to really rest her throat." He chuckled and Esmeralda cocked a questioning eyebrow in his direction. Saphira just glared and shook her head. "I wish you could have seen it, Es - one minute this kid was screaming bloody murder and the next he'd popped Saphira right in the voice box. I don't know what she said to him and his parents, but that brat didn't make another sound the rest of the time they were here. And not only did they not try to skip out on their bill, I'm pretty sure they left a hefty little tip."

Esmeralda turned a look on Saphira, who had the decency to look sheepish. Esmeralda just shook her head. "What am I gonna do with you?" she asked with a wry smile.

"Love me for the rest of your life?" whispered.

"How about forever?"

"I like the sound of that," Saphira replied, brushing a kiss across the knuckles of the hand she still held in her own.

"All right you too... enough mush. A man could drown in it around here if he wasn't careful, and I got plans with my girl tonight. Now grab your food and sit up to the table and eat. I'm almost done back here, and it's getting on to time for you girls to head home."

"Thank you, Joe," Esmeralda said prettily. Saphira just rolled her eyes and took the plate, releasing Esmeralda's hand and grabbing two empty glasses and filling them with milk. Soon they were digging in and Joe smiled as he watched them from the kitchen. Neither of them was speaking, but plenty seemed to be getting said anyway.

It didn't take long for them to finish up and Saphira passed him the dirty dishes. Then he walked them to the door to lock up behind them, and they were on their way home.

Esmeralda shared her conversation with Brianna as well as the gossip she'd heard about Charisma. Saphira didn't really have any comment to make on either issue - even if it hadn't bothered her to talk - though she winced when Esmeralda shared Brianna's renewed determination to keep herself out of Charisma's orbit.

"I know there's nothing else we can do at this point, but honestly, all it feels like we're doing is marking time," Esmeralda said plainly. "I wish I knew what He was waiting for. The sense of impending doom is hanging over everything like a pall at this point, and the stress of it is gonna drive me crazy."

"You're already crazy," Amber stated with a rakish grin as they entered the house. Saphira reached out and smacked her in the back of the head. "Hey!" glaring, but stopping her retaliation when Esmeralda stepped between them.

"That's enough... both of you," she commanded, looking back and forth between them. Her gaze settled on Saphira. "Go get a hot shower, Sweetheart. Maybe that will help relax your throat. And you," turning to Amber. "What are you doing home this time of night?"

Amber looked closely at Saphira, noting a slight bruise mark on her neck. "You okay?" Saphira nodded, but moved to follow Esmeralda's directive. The truth was, it hurt a lot and she was tired on top of everything else. Amber made a grab for her arm, but Esmeralda intercepted it.

"I'll tell you all about it," she told Amber. "Go on, love. I'll just be a minute."

Saphira went into their bedroom and closed the door. Amber put her hands on her hips. "All right... so?" Esmeralda gave Amber a brief overview of Joe's accounting of events. Amber laughed. Esmeralda crossed her arms and waited for Amber to take a deep breath and shake her head.

"I'm not laughing that Saphira got hurt, but I do wish I had been there to see her in action. It's been a long time since I've seen that part of her."

"I know. I miss it too. Now - why are you here instead of keeping an eye on Charisma?"

"She's still with Opal and Turq... apparently she's resumed some of her after-hours schmoozing."

Esmeralda's eyebrows went into her hairline. "Well, that explains why I didn't see her tonight. I wonder if this was already on her agenda."

"I don't think so. I went to the house earlier when Ame was putting Adam to bed. Opal had called to let her know they were going to be late. Ame's supposed to call me as soon as Charisma gets home. Because she's gonna need to sleep even if she stays at the Tagherty house."

"Right... of course," glancing at her watch. "Although maybe you should go on over there - as late as it is, she should already be in bed. Otherwise, she'll never be able to keep up with Adam tomorrow, even with a half-day of school." Amber's eyes widened when she checked the time and nodded frantically. Esmeralda smiled. "Okay, I'm gonna go take care of Saphira. Let me know if...."

"I will, Es, but you know we're so far out of this all we're doing is babysitting at this point."

"I know; it doesn't lessen our responsibility, though."

"I suppose," Amber shrugged. "Now go look after Saphira before she comes looking for you." Esmeralda nodded and turned, entering the bedroom without a backwards glance. Amber waited until she closed the door behind her before scrubbing her hands over her face and heading out towards Charisma's house. With a little luck, Ame was already in bed asleep and all Amber would have to do would be wait for Charisma to arrive home.

************

Saphira was already curled up in bed with her eyes closed when Esmeralda finally entered the bedroom to stay. Saphira had still been in the shower when she'd originally stepped inside the room, so Esmeralda had decided to fix Saphira a cup of hot tea with plenty of lemon and honey. She didn't think it had taken *that* long, but....

"You gonna bring that over here?" Saphira whispered hoarsely into the dark, "or you gonna make me get up and get it myself?" Saphira gave Esmeralda a crooked half-smile and Esmeralda grinned back as she moved towards Saphira's side of the bed.

"I thought you might be asleep already. You didn't stay in the shower very long."

"Too tired."

Esmeralda frowned and set the mug on the bedside table, then leaned forward and brushed her lips over Saphira's forehead. "You don't feel feverish. You sure you're all right?"

"Just tired... and sore."

"All right," kissing her lips softly before standing and moving to the other side of the bed. "Well, if you think you can drink the tea, it should help with the pain and the swelling. Otherwise, give me five minutes and I'll join you. Sleep is probably the best thing for you," shaking her head when she heard the deep, rhythmic breathing that signified that Saphira was already asleep.

Esmeralda quickly went through her nightly routine, absently giving thanks that she was once more able to provide help and comfort when it was needed as opposed to being the one constantly in need of it. She eased her side of the covers down and slipped into bed next to Saphira, smiling when Saphira naturally turned and tucked herself into Esmeralda's embrace.

Then she closed her eyes and joined her mate in the land of Morpheus.

************

The next couple weeks followed the same pattern - except for the luncheon meeting between Charisma and Brianna. There were committee meetings and legislation and votes, but Charisma and Brianna managed to remain off each other's radar. It wasn't hard, really - there was so much work to do, and since Charisma had returned to making connections in the evenings at least once or twice a week, they had very little opportunity to run into each other.

Brianna still hadn't called Okasa. It wasn't the fact that she didn't believe Charisma - she did. Charisma had never been able to lie to Brianna, even when they had first met. No, it was more that Brianna wasn't certain she was willing to risk everything again. She missed the Tagherty family, but she was adjusting to life without them in it. She didn't want to have to get used to it again.

So things went along as they had been, until one evening when they both happened to be in the Senate office building when Rick came upstairs looking for Esmeralda.



Chapter LXXXVII

Brianna's day started the same way they had since coming back from the holiday break - early into the office to read over whatever legislation was on tap for the day, followed by committee meetings and personal meetings and voting roll calls.... The list went on and on. She always tried to wait for Esmeralda to show up, though. There was always something of interest to discuss, whether it had to do with what Brianna was currently engaged in or their past histories or their plans for their little bit of leisure time.

Charisma was also on a routine very similar to Brianna's, though she did not always remain in the office in the evenings anymore. Laura had convinced her to get out and mingle with her colleagues more often, for although Charisma had the backing of several of the major players in the Senate, if she was serious about making a run for the White House, she was going to need more movers and shakers in her corner when the time came. Still, she made time to be on hand two or three nights a week to talk to Esmeralda. She found her days and weeks tended to go much smoother when they shared a bit of girl talk together. It wasn't as though they talked about anything pressing or important, but just having that time with one another gave Charisma immeasurable comfort.

So it was that several weeks after Charisma's talk with Brianna in regards to her involvement with the Tagherty family, both Senator Walker and Senator Tagherty were waiting in their offices for Esmeralda to arrive. Though Esmeralda was quiet, she could be heard making her way along the hallway slowly if you knew what to listen for, and both Brianna and Charisma did. And they were both in their offices, patiently waiting, when the sound of a ruckus brought them out into the hallway.

Esmeralda had completed almost half the offices on the floor, when Rick emerged from the elevator almost running, and calling out her name far louder than the decorum of this place demanded. Esmeralda turned to shush him, but one glimpse at his face made the blood drain from her own face and her legs shake. She grabbed the cleaning cart for support and waited for Rick to reach her.

By that point, not only had Brianna and Charisma made it to their hall doors, but so had the other few Senators who were also working late. They all stood back waiting to see what had brought Rick, who up to that moment had been a quiet, by-the-book individual, running and yelling through the halls of the Senate office building. He didn't even notice them he was so focused on Esmeralda.

When he reached her, she clutched at his arm with one hand, knowing whatever he had to say didn't bode well for her. Then the words came out of his mouth, and only his grip on her kept her from falling to the floor.

"Es, it's Saphira. She's...." He stopped and shook his head, willing the tears not to come. She gripped his arm tighter and he struggled not to wince at the pain. Instead he focused on what he needed to say. "I don't have any details - all I know is she was just rushed to the hospital at Georgetown. Es... they don't expect her to make it."

Esmeralda stared at Rick like he was speaking a foreign language - a fact that should have been funny given the number of languages she was fluent in. But it wasn't funny and it didn't change the fact that she was having trouble processing what he had said.

Fortunately, Charisma and Brianna recognized the signs of shock and took charge as a team much in the same manner they had done during their college years. Charisma called Turq to pick them up immediately while Brianna called for a police escort to get them to the hospital as quickly as possible. One of the other Senators had gotten Esmeralda a glass of water and another brought out a chair for her to sit in. Charisma called Matilda and Brianna called the hospital and as soon as Turq beeped that the car was out front, they got one on either side of Esmeralda and headed for the elevator. "Rick, you'll take care of things here?"

"You don't be worrying none about that, Senator Tagherty. We'll take care of this business. You just look out for Es and let us know...."

"We will," Brianna assured him as the doors closed.

They were seated in the back of Charisma's limousine with Esmeralda between them when the startling sound of sirens brought Esmeralda's head up. There were no tears - there was nothing at all. And that look scared both Charisma and Brianna, causing them to exchange worried glances.

"What did Matilda say?" Brianna asked.

"Not much - it was hard to make sense of what she was saying. Apparently Saphira just collapsed... no warning, no nothing. Joe called the paramedics while Matilda called Rick. What did the hospital say?"

"Only that things looked grave."

"Why this?" Esmeralda whispered, so softly both Charisma and Brianna nearly missed her words. "Why now?" She looked up, eyes unseeing on the roof of the car. "You can't need her more than I do - You don't love her like I love her!!! WHY??" almost screaming. "Why are you doing this??"

Brianna grasped Esmeralda's hands and Charisma cupped her face. "Es... ES... ESMERALDA!" blowing lightly into Esmeralda's face to force her to take a deep breath. "C'mon now - you need to stay with us here. We'll be with you every step of the way... no matter what. But you need to stay here with us now, all right?"

Esmeralda looked between them and blinked, then looked between them again, actually seeing them this time. Brianna gently chafed some warmth back into her ice-cold hands and Charisma's thumbs gently traced over her cheekbones. Esmeralda looked at them a final time before closing her eyes and swallowing hard. "All right," she whispered.

Then they were pulling up into the emergency room entrance, and that started a whole new commotion.

Their arrival, precipitated by the police escort, caused an immense amount of confusion and upset and angered a number of medical personnel. That in turn caused the nurse at the desk to refuse to give Esmeralda any information, claiming her right to be recognized as Saphira's mate was irrelevant. Even protestations from both Brianna and Charisma did nothing to get them the information they needed.

In something of a daze, Esmeralda left them arguing with the desk nurse while she went to sit in the waiting room. The charge nurse had just come out from the back and noticed the lost, forlorn look Esmeralda wore and put the chart she was looking at in its appropriate spot before walking around the commotion at the desk and wandering over to take a seat beside Esmeralda on one of the hard chairs.

"You okay?" knowing it was a stupid question, but needing something to open the conversation with.

"No," Esmeralda replied starkly. "She's gone and they won't even let me see her to say goodbye."

The charge nurse covered Esmeralda's cold hands and turned to face her more directly. "Who?"

Esmeralda turned and met the nurse's compassionate brown eyes with empty green ones. It was all the nurse could do to contain her gasp. "My mate... Saphira."

"Are you Esmeralda?" The blonde head nodded. The nurse made a decision. "Come with me," rising and offering Esmeralda her hand. Esmeralda looked at her a long moment before comprehension dawned. She took the nurse's hand and let her lead her to the back.

Meanwhile, Charisma and Brianna had tired of dealing with the bigotry of the desk nurse and they'd each placed a phone call that caused the hospital switchboard to light up like a Christmas tree. Only once they were off the phone did they realized they had somehow lost Esmeralda, but before they could cause even more of a disturbance, the charge nurse returned and took them both by the elbows... despite their protests.

"Do you know...?"
"Who do you think...?"

"Before either of you finish those thoughts, Senators," the nurse said firmly, "I'd like to remind you that this is a hospital and there is such a thing as bad publicity in politics." They exchanged glances and immediately deflated. "Thank you."

"I'm sorry, Nurse...." Charisma paused and looked at the woman's nametag. "I'm sorry, Nurse Walters," Charisma apologized with Brianna nodding her affirmation. "Nurse Ratched over there is being impossible about letting Esmeralda back to see Saphira and on top of that, we seem to have lost Esmeralda as well." Charisma pushed her hands through her hair and took a deep breath in an effort to bring herself under control. Brianna reflexively placed a calming hand on Charisma's back and the effect was instantaneous as both women perceptibly relaxed. Nurse Walters noticed but didn't comment, focusing instead on easing their minds in her own way. But first....

"May I ask how you two are related to either Esmeralda or Saphira?"

Brianna and Charisma looked at one another before Brianna said, "They are very dear friends... almost like family."

"They ARE family, if you ask my mother," Charisma added when Nurse Walters frowned.

"Then perhaps you should be making phone calls instead of upsetting the entire trauma department." Walters held up her hands before they could object. "I understand you're just looking out for Esmeralda, but she's already in the back with Saphira... saying her goodbyes," she added when they opened their mouths to speak. "So maybe you might want to start taking care of the things that need to be done... to ease Esmeralda's burden a little." And with those parting words, Nurse Walters turned and headed to the desk, ready to remind the nurse there what being a caring professional entailed.

Brianna and Charisma stared at one another, equally ashamed of the uproar they'd caused and dismayed at the fact that Esmeralda was suddenly without her other half. Still, the charge nurse had made an excellent point - there were others that needed to be called and made aware of the situation and there were any number of things that could be taken care of without Esmeralda's input.

"I'll call Mama," Charisma offered quietly. Brianna nodded.

"I'll try to get in touch with Ruby, then see if I can locate Matilda and Joe. I thought they'd have been here by now." Brianna looked around. "C'mon... we're really not supposed to use these in here and there's not really a reason to upset the applecart any more than we've done already. Besides, I'm sure Nurse Walters will come find us if Es comes out before we're done and I need some air."

Charisma nodded. "I'm with you." They turned and together walked out the emergency room doors. Charisma took a deep breath, then winced at the scent of oil and gasoline and stale cigarettes. "Do you really think she will?"

Brianna looked up, frowning. She'd been engrossed trying to figure out where to call next if Ruby didn't answer at Esmeralda's home. "Do I think who really will what?" she finally asked, shifting her attention back to Charisma and the conversation at hand.

"Do you really think Esmeralda will really leave Saphira's side before she's made to - even if she's already... you know, gone?"

"I think when the time comes, we're going to need every ounce of persuasiveness to get her to leave, so make your call. We're going to need everyone on our side we can get."

Charisma nodded her agreement and pressed a button before lifting the phone to her ear. This was one phone call she'd never expected to make. Then Okasa was picking up the receiver and Charisma turned away from Brianna to relay the wretched news to her family.

Brianna meanwhile had dialed Esmeralda's, hoping beyond hope that Ruby was home and awake... or at least close enough to a phone to answer it. She still had no idea where else to try if Ruby wasn't home. Then all her worries were invalidated when a sleepy voice picked up the receiver.

"'lo?"

"Hello, Ruby? This is Brianna Walker."

The change in Ruby's voice was abrupt and Brianna could hear her throwing the covers back and rising from the bed. "Senator Walker?" her voice was calm, though Brianna detected the slightest hint of a tremor. "What's wrong? Has something happened to Esmeralda?"

"Es is fine," Brianna assured Ruby, hearing her sigh of relief. "Ruby... it's Saphira. We're here with Es at Georgetown University. I don't have any answers yet, but it doesn't look very good at all. I thought you'd want to know, since you're their family."

"You're right... I would," wondering why Turq hadn't called. "It's going to take me a little while to get there, but I'll be there as soon as I can."

"I'll have Jas come and pick you up, Ruby; don't you worry about that."

"Thank you, Senator. I'll see you soon." And the line went dead before Brianna could respond. Ruby looked around her room, filled to its tiny brim with nosy, concerned Angels.

"Ruby?" Indi asked. The older Angel held up a hand and shook her head, silently asking for a moment. Jas' phone rang and she answered it, her replies brief to the barked out instructions on the other end. When she was done, she hung up and all eyes turned back to Ruby.

"You wanna tell me what *that* was all about?" Jas asked looking at Ruby.

Ruby shook her head. "I'm as in the dark as to what's happening as the rest of you. Apparently something has happened to Saphira."

"That was Brianna," Jas continued, pointing to her phone. "I'm supposed to take Ruby to the hospital as soon as she's ready." She looked down at herself. "I better go get dressed," said as she left the room.

"What about the rest of us?" Opal asked.

"I think it would be perfectly acceptable if you all showed up," Ruby offered as she stripped out of her pajamas and slid into some of her rare 'civilian' clothes. "I mean, it would be natural for Turq and Jas to have placed a call to Brianna's and Charisma's personal assistants to let them know that something was going on, right? Just use the Metro or a cab and don't show up together."

"Speaking of...." Opal growled. "Why didn't Turq call us? Or why didn't Amber or Coral...?"

Ruby glowered as she stepped into her shoes. "I dunno," she bit off fiercely as she finished buttoning her coat. "But I certainly intend to find out!"

Jas reappeared at the door just then and Ruby nodded approvingly. Then the two of them made their way downstairs and outside. It was only when they heard the outer door close behind them that Opal and Indi exchanged glances.

"I'm a little confused," Indi said as they headed back towards their rooms to get dressed.

Opal laughed, though there was no humor in the sound at all. "Only a little?"

"For now," Indi replied seriously. "Does this mean the Father really made them mortal when he took everything away from them?"

"It certainly looks like it," Opal said grimly. "I wonder what happens to Angels when they die."

"Opal, what's going to happen to Es? Being separated from Saphira briefly nearly killed her. This will...."

"I know. C'mon... let's get there. I'm sure we'll be sorting this out for days."

************

Matilda and Joe came rushing towards the emergency room exit, slowing when both Brianna and Charisma extended an arm, signally them to wait until the Senators were no longer on the phone. Matilda saw the tears beneath the surface on their faces and automatically reached for Joe who clutched her outstretched hand in support.

"No," she whispered brokenly. Charisma and Brianna both nodded. "Oh no... no. What happened?"

Brianna shrugged. "We don't know yet. It's only due to the compassion of the charge nurse that Es was even allowed into the back to say her goodbyes."

Matilda's eyes hardened. "Excuse me?"

"Let it go, Matilda," Charisma instructed firmly. "Nurse Walters made sure she got back there and we have other things to concern ourselves with at the moment."

"What's more important than making sure...?"

"She's right, Mama," Joe replied before Matilda could finish her question. "We need to do what we can for Essie right now. We can worry about the bigots later."

Matilda let out a frustrated sigh - she knew they were right, but it did nothing to dim the righteous indignation she felt. She made a mental note to find out what had happened and have a word with somebody later. For now though....

"Okay... you're all right," taking a deep breath and pushing the tears she felt burning to the back of her throat. "What can we do?"

"Wait," Charisma said. "I've called Mama and she's going to inform the rest of the family, but it will take some time for them to get here."

"Jas is on her way with Ruby, and I called Rick and let him know that Esmeralda would be out on bereavement leave. The only thing we can do right this minute is wait for Es to come out from the back and be here to support her when she does. If we're lucky, maybe someone will tell us what happened to Saphira, but it's not like we're actually entitled to any answers."

"And tomorrow we'll do what we can to ease Es' burden," Charisma added.

"I don't think that's gonna be possible," Ruby spoke as she approached the small group. "The only time Es has been without Saphira, it nearly killed her, and that was simply banishment... an enforced separation, not something as permanent as death." She sighed. "I'm gonna go in and see what I can find out," she added with little hesitation. As one body, the rest turned and followed her in.

No one was particularly surprised when Nurse Walters appeared at the desk when Ruby asked for information. Walters motioned her around the desk and through the double doors she'd taken Esmeralda beyond some time earlier. They had just disappeared when Turq and Jas entered the waiting room, each taking a seat with the small contingent. In another few minutes, Opal stepped in from the emergency entrance and then Indi came around the corner from the direction of the main doors. Rick was the last to arrive while Ruby was still in the back with Esmeralda and the nurse, and he took his place within the silent group.

Then they waited.

************

"I think she's still in shock," Nurse Walters told Ruby in a hushed voice as they approached the small alcove Saphira's body had been placed in to wait its trip down to the morgue. "She hasn't said a word or shed a tear that I can tell, and we're going to have to move Saphira's body to the morgue soon. The ME still has to do an autopsy to determine the cause of death."

"Must you?" Ruby asked with distaste and a hint of apprehension.

Walters nodded. "Unfortunately, yes - it's the law in sudden death cases like this. I've tried to give Esmeralda time to say goodbye, but...."

Ruby shook her head. "I don't know if she can, but I'll do my best." Then they reached the alcove and stopped at the sight that met their gaze. Esmeralda had crawled onto the gurney and curled herself around Saphira's body, gently tracing her features. Nurse Walters and Ruby exchanged alarmed looks, then walked swiftly towards the heartbreaking tableau, knowing the next few minutes were going to be extremely hard and hoping to be the support Esmeralda would need to get through them.



Chapter LXXXVIII

"Es?" Ruby asked quietly. "Es," she repeated a little more firmly. "It's time to say goodbye to Saphira so she can rest."

"She's already resting, Ruby," Esmeralda replied, her eyes never leaving Saphira's still face. "See? I'm just gonna stay here with her."

Ruby bit her lip. This was going to be harder than she'd expected, and she'd expected damned near impossible. "Honey, you can't stay with Saphira now," she offered gently. "She's gone to see the Father and you can't go with her. You have work to do here, remember?"

Nurse Walters frowned at the words passing Ruby's lips. As comfort went, they left a lot to be desired. And they didn't seem to have the necessary effect either; Esmeralda simply closed her eyes and clasped Saphira's cold hand tighter.

"I'm done, Ruby. There's nothing left for me to do." She flinched when Ruby laid a warm hand on her chilled skin, but there was no way to pull away from the touch without disturbing Saphira. And Esmeralda was loath to do that - it would make this whole situation all too real.

"Es...."

"No, Ruby. Just leave me alone. Please - just leave me alone," the last a bare whisper.

"Oh honey... I can't. We have to let the doctors take Saphira to find out what happened, and you need to come with me so...."

Esmeralda opened her eyes and Ruby felt the flames sear her even as she strove not to flinch away from the raw fury she could feel emanating from them. She'd never seen Esmeralda truly angry before... not even when she and Saphira had been separated the first time. So she held on and met Esmeralda's stare, hoping beyond hope she could keep Esmeralda grounded.

"I *know* what happened, Ruby. He took her from me - He took her from me and now she's gone!!"

"Don't you want to know why?"

"No," the voice dead. Ruby watched the fire in the green eyes extinguish itself, leaving only emptiness behind. "It doesn't matter why; it only matters that she's not here anymore." Without another word, Esmeralda closed her eyes and turned her face back into Saphira's neck. She didn't even have a chance to register the pinprick as Nurse Walters administered a sedative. And she never felt them move her to another gurney. They got her settled, and the nurse motioned to the interns who had been standing down the hallway waiting for her signal. One took charge of rolling Saphira's body to the elevator to take her to the morgue; the other started pushing Esmeralda towards a cubicle in the emergency room area. Nurse Walters took Ruby by the arm.

"C'mon - let's go tell your friends what's going on, then you can come back and sit with Esmeralda until she wakes up if you like."

"What happens then?"

"Well, once Esmeralda is awake, you can take her home. As soon as the autopsy is complete, someone will be in touch to find out where you'd like the body to be delivered in preparation for burial or cremation."

"Will we be told what happened? What the cause of death was?" Ruby clarified at Walters' frown.

"Yes. In fact, the attending should be out to talk to everyone before you leave. I think she had some questions."

Ruby nodded. "All right. I'll wait with the rest to talk to the doctor, then I'll come back and sit with Es. Can any of the rest come?"

"They're not supposed to - family only, you know. But I'll see about giving them a minute to look in on her. I think she's gonna need all the love and support she can get to make it through this."

"I'm not sure even that will help," Ruby mumbled, but before Nurse Walters could question her further, they were stepping through the double doors into the waiting room. As soon as they appeared, one whole section of the waiting area rose to their feet as though propelled by springs. Walters patted Ruby on the arm.

"I'll go find the doctor for you."

"Thank you, Nurse Walters - you've been a treasure."

Walters gave Ruby a smile and headed over to the nurses' station. Ruby took a deep breath and walked towards the small knot of people clustered together for moral support.

"Es had to be sedated and she's currently in one of the little rooms in the back. The nurse said when it wears off we can take her home. They've taken Saphira's body down to the morgue for autopsy," seeing every Angels' eyes widened with a number of unhappy emotions. "Apparently it's the law in circumstances like this. The doctor is supposed to come out and talk to us briefly as soon as the nurse locates her."

"Can we go back and see Es?" Matilda asked, wiping her eyes.

"The nurse is gonna try to give everyone a chance to, but no promises," Ruby said. "We've already created quite a stir here tonight and it's not fair to the other patients and their families. Truthfully, I'm not sure Es is in a place to recognize anyone, much less acknowledge them."

"Is she going to be all right, Ruby?" Brianna asked softly.

Ruby shook her head. "I don't know, Senator... I really don't know."

"And if you were to guess?" Charisma inquired.

Ruby sighed. She didn't want to get into this, but.... "Senator Tagherty, just being separated from Saphira made her so sick, she nearly died from it because Es thought it was going to be a permanent situation. But at least she had the assurance that Saphira was alive - she had a sliver of hope and it still nearly destroyed her. What do you think knowing Saphira is never coming back will do to her?"

"I think we'll be keeping an eye on her," blinking the tears from her eyes. Heads nodded all around, then a throat clearing behind them caused them all to turn. Standing behind them was a petite brunette woman, compassion plain in her tired brown eyes. She looked at the group of people standing in front of her, noting the disparity of social classes represented. It made her wonder, but she tucked the thought into the recesses of her mind to consider later. For now, she needed to talk to the family of the woman who had died so suddenly in her emergency room.

"Is one of you family to either Saphira or Esmeralda?" she asked, a slight drawl evident in her soft voice. Ruby stepped forward.

"I am," extending her hand. "Ruby Angelo. You're the doctor that took care of Saphira?"

"I'm Dr. Terrell," nodding as she took Ruby's hand and briefly covered it with her left one in a gesture of sympathy and comfort. "I'm so sorry for your loss."

"Thank you, Dr. Terrell. Do you know what...?

"We're not sure, but.... Did Saphira fall recently? Or take a blow to the head?"

Ruby frowned. "No - she got hit in the throat several weeks ago...."

"She hit her head then," Matilda broke in. "When that little boy hit her, she stumbled and slipped... hit her head pretty hard, but she said she was fine. There wasn't any blood, so I took her word. Are you saying...?" covering her mouth in dread at the implications.

"We're not sure at this point - we won't know for certain until the autopsy report is done - but I suspect she suffered from a brain hemorrhage." The doctor watched the horror dawn in Matilda's eyes and continued. "There was nothing you could have done - you wouldn't have necessarily even noticed that there was anything wrong. As I said, we're not even sure that's what happened."

"But you believe it is, don't you, Doctor?"

Dr. Terrell nodded her head. "Yes, I do." She gently squeezed Ruby's hand and released it. "Are you going to sit with Esmeralda?" Ruby nodded. Dr. Terrell looked at everyone else. "The rest of you need to go home. There's nothing else you can do here tonight, and I don't need you filling up my waiting room. Esmeralda will probably be out of it until much later today, and she'll need you to be there for her then. So go get some rest." No one moved and Dr. Terrell put her hands on her hips. "It wasn't a suggestion, ladies and gentlemen. Ruby can stay, but the rest of you need to go home."

Brianna and Charisma looked at one another a long moment, then turned to the others. "You heard the doctor," Charisma instructed. "Everyone out. Make sure Brianna or I have your contact numbers and as soon as we hear something, we'll make sure everyone else is notified." She turned to Ruby. "You'll call one of us first." Not quite a command, but not a polite request either. Ruby nodded her acquiescence.

"Of course, Senator."

"Jas, you remain here to take Ruby and Es home whenever they are ready to go," Brianna instructed. Jas nodded and moved back to take a seat in a quiet corner of the waiting room.

"All right," Charisma said. "Does anyone need a ride home? It might be a tight squeeze, but I think we could all fit."

"Joe and I drove over," Matilda said with a shake of her head. "But thank you for the offer. You'll keep us apprised?"

"As soon as we know, Matilda, so will you."

"Thank you, Senator." She turned to Ruby. "You'll tell Es...?"

"I will," Ruby promised. Matilda nodded, then she and Joe headed for the exit. Rick offered Ruby his hand briefly, then followed Matilda and Joe out the door. Charisma motioned to Turq.

"Will you bring the car around, please?" she asked wearily, then looked at Brianna, Opal and Indi. "Can I offer you ladies a lift?"

"Thank you, Senator," Opal replied. "Is there anything you need for us to take care of?"

"Nothing that won't wait until tomorrow. Brianna, would you like a ride?"

"I'd appreciate it, Charisma; thank you," her voice beyond exhausted. She turned to Ruby. "Go be with Es, and if there's anything we can do... anything you need...."

"Thank you, Senator... Brianna. Thank you all. I'll be in touch as soon as I can."

They nodded and Ruby turned and followed the doctor back to where Esmeralda was ensconced. Then they made their way out of the emergency room and into the limousine that Turq had pulled to the door. A moment later they were leaving the hospital parking lot.

It was silent in the vehicle; everyone was too drained to do much more than stare out the window or swipe at the occasional errant tear. Turq dropped Indi off first, then Opal. Neither Brianna nor Charisma had the presence of mind to notice that Opal and Indi didn't enter the buildings they were dropped in front of and Turq pulled away as soon as the car door was closed. When the car was out of sight of the building, they disappeared completely.

Turq turned the car towards Brianna's apartment building, knowing Opal and Indi were back at the hospital with Ruby keeping an eye on Esmeralda. She was headed there herself as soon as she got the Senators home.

Brianna and Charisma didn't say a word until Turq pulled up in front of Brianna's building. Then Brianna turned to Charisma and patted her hand for just a moment before drawing away and gathering her things. "Thank you for the ride, Charisma."

"It was my pleasure, Brianna, though I wish the circumstances were different."

"Charisma...."

"Brianna, I hope we can be real best friends again one day, but not at this sort of cost. I would never have had this happen to anyone - especially Esmeralda and Saphira - not even if it meant it would make things right between us. That's not what this was about."

Brianna blew out a shaky breath. "I know, Charisma. You'll call me if you hear from Ruby?"

"First thing - you'll do the same?"

"Of course." Brianna stepped from the car, leaning down into the door Turq kept open for her. "See you later today, Charisma."

"Goodnight, Brianna."

************

Charisma walked in the door to her silent house, closing the door and setting the alarm before trudging up the stairs. She paused for several long minutes in Adam's room, letting the peaceful rhythm of his breathing soothe her aching soul. When she finally got her tears under control, she crossed the room and pulled the covers up over him and kissed him goodnight. Then she left his room and headed to her own, only to be stopped by the sight of a disheveled Ame standing in the doorway of what was quickly becoming her room in Charisma's house.

"Everything okay, Senator?"

Charisma shook her head. "No - rough night, and the next few days will probably be equally as bad."

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

"No, Ame - you're doing enough already. Just keep looking out for my son."

Ame smiled. "It's my pleasure, Senator... most of the time, at least," garnering her a tragic smile. "I'll let you get back to...." Ame motioned vaguely around. "Whatever you were headed for. Goodnight, Senator."

"Goodnight, Ame," Charisma said, turning as Ame closed the door again. She glanced at her watch. She could probably reach Kent now, knowing it would have been a futile effort before. Besides, her family should be arriving soon - no point in trying to sleep before they did. Charisma grabbed her phone and started dialing Kent's number, wondering if she'd get to see the bed before the sun came up in just a few, short hours.

************

"So what's the story?" Ruby asked as Turq finally made her appearance in Esmeralda's tiny enclosure. Opal, Indi and Jas were already there, though only Ruby was noticeable to the human eyes that periodically checked on her and her charge. As far as they knew, Ruby was talking to Esmeralda in an effort to provide comfort.

"None of us knew what was going on until we got here, Ruby. I got bits and pieces in the limo, but nothing I could really report on. I tried to call to see if you could find out what was going on, but I couldn't get through."

"I was supposed to be waiting for a call to pick Brianna up," Jas chimed in. "She sent me out on some errands earlier, then told me to go home and wait for her to call. It's why I was at home instead of at the Senate Building. I think she'd been planning to go with Es to the diner."

"What about Coral and Amber? Surely they knew...."

Turq shook her head. "Amber said they found out when Es did, but they were forbidden to notify any of us. They were physically unable to do anything but stay with Brianna and Charisma."

"That means that Ame, Mal and Jade are probably out of the loop as well."

"Well that just sucks!" Opal snarled, and the rest looked at her wide-eyed. "Oh, don't any of you look at me like that and pretend that you don't think the same thing." She focused her attention on Ruby. "So what are we supposed to do now?"

Ruby shook her head. "I don't know, Opal. First we have to get through the next few days."

"You think she'll survive it?" Jas asked quietly.

"She'll survive for a little while," Ruby said confidently. "She'll get through the funeral. After that...?"

"What about the autopsy, Ruby?" This from Indi. "Won't that show the anomalies of Saphira's angelic nature?"

"Indi, you know nothing will show up that He doesn't will first. But why are you assuming there would be any evidence of anything that wasn't human? Angels don't die, and yet, Saphira is dead... just as though she had been born a human mortal. I'd say that points to the sheer humanity of her nature."

"I thought one reason Esmeralda refused continued medical treatment was a fear of someone discovering she was... well, for lack of a better description, abnormal."

"That's true - until today we had no reason to believe that He had removed their immortality when He banished them from home - especially since Es did survive her illness. We all know that could have easily killed her," watching heads nod. "But a big reason for her refusal was the cost involved; they simply did not have the means to pay for more than she had already received. As it was, a majority of the therapy Esmeralda took was provided free of charge by a friend."

"What a cluster," Turq offered with disgust.

"Worse than before," Ruby confirmed, "and it was completely snarled before this."

"So we're right back where we started, which is... what now?"

Turq snorted. "I think if we knew the answer to that, we'd have gotten our happily ever after ending already." She looked around at the assorted machines standing quietly waiting to be called into service. "Had anyone else here wondered if maybe Brianna and Charisma weren't actually the real clients in this case? After all, it's not like they've been treated like any case *I've* ever worked on, and I'm betting the rest of you would say the same."

"You think Esmeralda and Saphira...?"

"I think He's got a lot to answer for at this point."

"Careful, Turq," Ruby warned. "That is dangerously close to insubordination. Lucifer was kicked out for less."

"I'm not sure I care anymore, Ruby. I'm not sure I can keep doing this... not sure I want to - not if He's going to play games with people's lives like this."

Before Ruby could formulate a reply, Esmeralda blinked her eyes open. She didn't move or speak, but she couldn't stop the silent tears from rolling down her face. One by one, each of the Angels in the room with her kissed her forehead, then shimmered out of sight until only Ruby remained.

"What say we get out of here, Es?" Esmeralda sat up without a word while Ruby rang for the charge nurse. The sooner they left the hospital, the better for all involved.



Chapter LXXXIX

The house was silent when they entered and Ruby chanced to wonder if the others had gone straight to bed when they arrived home. She wasn't concerned, however; she was much more focused on getting Esmeralda to her room and settled before she collapsed. Because that is exactly what Ruby expected to happen - she'd seen what separation had done to them before. Ruby sighed and walked beside Esmeralda until they reached the bedroom door. Then Esmeralda stopped and Ruby was forced to stop as well... waiting for Esmeralda to give some indication of what was going on.

When she didn't move... didn't speak... for several minutes, Ruby finally took the bull by the horns and gently grasped Esmeralda's jaw in her hand, urging Esmeralda's eyes up until she could look into them. Ruby bit the inside of her lip to keep her reaction from becoming visible. Instead, she took a deep breath, then whispered softly, "Es? C'mon, honey... let's get you tucked into bed."

"No, Ruby," her voice so low Ruby had to focus on the movements of her lips. "I have to do this by myself. Don't... please," cutting Ruby off before she could begin to formulate a response. "Nothing is going to make this better. Please... just leave me alone."

Ruby stared into dead, gray eyes - the color sucked out of them when Esmeralda's inner light was snuffed out - and it took all she had not to shiver against the chill that set into her bones. "All right, Es. We'll be here if you need us. We'll talk about the arrangements later?"

Esmeralda just shrugged and opened the door to the bedroom she had shared with Saphira since their exile in this place had begun. It more than anywhere else had been their home and Ruby watched as Esmeralda stiffened her shoulders before crossing the threshold. Then she closed the door behind her without a backwards glance and Ruby shook her head. She turned and headed towards the kitchen - despite her exhaustion, she needed a few minutes to recoup before heading upstairs to try and get a few minutes of rest before starting what promised to be one of the hardest days she had ever known. And she knew they were going to get worse before they got better.

She wasn't completely surprised to find the rest of the household there ahead of her - what did surprise her was the utter silence they were sitting in as well as the fact that *everyone* was there... including those on watch duty as well as Ame, who had been woken out of a sound sleep by Amber as soon as Charisma had gotten her family settled and crawled into bed herself. Now all eyes turned to Ruby, but before anyone could speak, she held up a hand.

"I know we need to talk; I just need a few minutes...please."

In answer, the rest turned back to their coffee. Amber poured Ruby a cup and set it down in front of her, squeezing her shoulder in support and understanding. Then she took her place leaning against the counter once more and waited for Ruby to speak.

************

Esmeralda leaned against the door, her hand over her mouth... though whether it was to keep from screaming or throwing up, she couldn't have rightly said. She breathed in, a sob settling in her chest as the aroma that was them settled into her lungs and on the back of her tongue. She wanted to rail and rage and scream at the unfairness... at the injustice of His action in taking Saphira away from her again despite everything. Instead, she shed her shoes and climbed into their bed, covering herself in Saphira's robe and wrapping herself around Saphira's pillow. Then Esmeralda closed her eyes and let the tears flow, never realizing when she fell asleep.

************

Okasa wasn't surprised to find Charisma in the kitchen when they finally arrived in Washington an hour or so before daybreak. It only took a glance to know that Charisma hadn't been to bed yet, but no amount of coaxing from Okasa was able to convince Charisma to lie down for just a little while. Finally, Patrick stepped in.

"Princess," garnering a small smile at the memories that moniker invoked. "You need some rest if you're going to be any good to anyone. Mama and I will be here if Adam gets up before Ame gets here and…. What?" asking when Charisma shook her head.

"Ame is already here."

"Of course... of course," Patrick agreed. "I wasn't thinking. However, we'll still be here when Adam and Ame get up. I'm pretty sure we can handle things for a little while so you can get some rest."

"Daddy...."

"Charisma, please don't be difficult about this. Mama and I will catch a little nap later today - while Adam is at school or when he gets a nap here... whatever," waving his hand dismissively. "Let us do this. We'll be there for you so you can be there for Esmeralda."

"Kent should be here shortly."

"And he knows how to find his way around, I'm sure," Patrick said with a teasing smile that Charisma couldn't begin to return. He wondered, but not enough to push at the moment. Instead, he put a hand on her back and gently guided her out of the kitchen and towards the stairs. "Go. We'll call you if we hear anything."

"What about the boys?"

"They'll be here for the service... as soon as we know when it is. Now go."

Charisma gave them one last look before she nodded, heading back upstairs to at least take a shower. Maybe that would help her feel a little more like a human being. She wondered how Esmeralda was doing and if Brianna had heard anything. She shook her head, knowing that if Brianna had heard something... anything, she'd have called. Despite their falling out - for lack of a better description - Charisma knew Brianna well enough to be sure of that.

Then she stripped down and stepped into the streaming water and put everything out of her mind for just a few minutes. Maybe it would make more sense if she just stopped thinking about it for a little while.

************

"Are you okay?" Kay asked Brianna as soon as the door was closed behind them. Brianna nodded and rubbed her itchy eyes. Every time she closed them, all she could see was the deadness she'd witnessed in Esmeralda's. It made her shiver again and Kay caught the slight movement. Without a word, she wrapped her arms around Brianna and held her while she cried.

Kay maneuvered them to the couch and they collapsed on it in a tangle of limbs. It was nothing they hadn't done before, but it wasn't anything they'd shared once they were no longer intimate. And though it felt a little strange and kind of awkward, it was also comfortable and familiar and Brianna took solace in the gesture.

In a few minutes, her tears slowed, and Brianna and Kay shifted until Kay held Brianna much as she would one of her children. She brushed a kiss over Brianna's brow and murmured, "You ready to talk about it now?"

Brianna snuggled her head under Kay's chin, and Kay tightened her arms reflexively. Brianna played with the tissue Kay had given her. "I'm not sure what there is to talk about, Kay - Saphira's dead."

"I know. And as sad as that fact is, I'm not sure I understand why this has made you as upset as it seems to. Is there something about you and Saphira that I should know?" Brianna jerked upright, nearly taking Kay's head off with her own in her haste. She glared at Kay, who visibly flinched at the fire being directed out her from Brianna's green eyes.

"You know me better than that, Kay - or at least you should. I don't date other peoples' wives. I'm not a home wrecker!!"

Kay held up a hand in surrender. "Hey! It was just a question; you're reacting pretty strongly for someone who was just a casual acquaintance. I'm trying to figure out how to help."

"She wasn't just a casual acquaintance, Kay - she was my friend... she and Esmeralda both. They treated me like family from the moment I met them." Brianna took a deep breath and the fire in her eyes was extinguished. "I think I'm mostly crying for Esmeralda. They were everything to one another, Kay. You didn't see how dead her eyes went when we discovered that Saphira was already gone."

"We'll be there for her as much as we can, Bri. But there's nothing we can do to make this better for her. This is something Esmeralda is going to have to learn to live without for the rest of her life... unless she decides that she is willing to settle for less than her mate."

Brianna shook her head. "She won't, Kay - you know that as well as I do after Thanksgiving. I'm not even sure she will live without this for very long."

"You think she's suicidal?" Kay asked with alarm.

"Not like you mean, no," Brianna responded sadly. "But I don't think the will to live will last for very long either. You haven't seen her, Kay - something in Esmeralda died when she got the news... and we didn't even know Saphira was dead yet."

"But Esmeralda did."

Brianna nodded. "It certainly seemed that way."

Kay bit her lips thoughtfully, then finally shifted until she and Brianna were standing side by side in front of the couch. "Lee and the kids will be here as soon as we know when the service is. But for now, I'm gonna tuck you into bed so you can get a little rest. Work will wait," Kay assured Brianna when Brianna opened her mouth to speak. "It's not like it's going to go anywhere and if it's urgent, someone will call. I'm perfectly capable of explaining there's been a death in the family."

They entered Brianna's bedroom and Kay tucked her in tenderly, brushing a kiss over her forehead before reaching to turn out the bedside lamp. Brianna stayed her action with a gentle grasp on her wrist and Kay looked at her with a question in her glance.

"Will you stay? Just until I fall asleep?" Brianna hated to appear so weak, but more than anything, she didn't want to be left alone. Without thought, Kay slipped off her shoes and lay down next to Brianna. She wrapped Brianna in a spooning embrace, then leaned forward to whisper in her ear.

"Go to sleep, Bri. I'll keep the bad dreams away."

"Thanks, Kay," Brianna answered on a sigh, and fell into sleep. Kay lay slightly beside her... keeping watch.

************

Ruby kept her eyes focused on her coffee cup as though it held the answers to all the questions she'd ever had about anything. Finally, though she blew out a breath and began to speak quietly. "I know everyone here is angry and frustrated and in mourning. So right here, right now, I'm offering every one of you the chance to speak without censure or prejudice. Once each of you has had your say, I'll say what I need to say and we'll move on. We have to," Ruby continued when she sensed their desire to argue. "Despite what we want or believe or feel at the moment, we still have a job to do. And there is NO WAY," looking up and pinning each of the others with a glare before she returned her gaze to her coffee cup, "Es is gonna suffer through this and us not finish what we started out to do."

"You really think we can?" Amber asked wearily, scrubbing at her eyes with the heels of her hands.

"I think we're so close, I can see it."

"Ruby, no offense, but we been this close for a while, and nothing has happened except one or the other of them walking away. Why do you think anything's going to change at this point?"

"I don't know that it will, Opal. But I can't just quit now. If I do... if *we* do, everything we've done, everything we've been through has all been for naught. And despite everything I'm feeling at the moment - and believe me, there's as much anger as there is sorrow - I have to believe it's got to count for something."

"And what about free will - *their* free will? They're the ones who've chosen this path. They don't want to be together! We can't MAKE them choose otherwise."

"No, we can't, Turq. But we can stay and do our jobs here until He calls us home. At least we'll be able to say we did everything we were supposed to... everything we could."

Amber chuckled sadly. "I can't believe I'm gonna say this, but Saphira was right - we should have just smacked their heads together to put some sense into them and been done with this months ago." The rest smiled wryly and nodded their agreement. "But Ruby is also right, much as it pains me to admit it. If we quit now, everything we've put up with will be wasted effort. Saphira will still be dead, Es will...." Amber looked down at the table and sucked in a shuddering breath. "I don't expect Es to survive this... I don't think any of us do." She looked up and met the eyes of each Angel gathered in the kitchen, seeing the truth of her words reflected back at her. "But even if she can't finish this assignment, it somehow feels like we'd be letting her down if we just quit now." She held up her hands before anyone could comment. "I know everyone here is frustrated beyond belief. And I know everyone would have preferred any number of things to have been handled differently... including His handling of Es and Saphira. Wanting doesn't change what is or what has already happened."

"So we just go on like what, Amber?" Turq asked with more than a hint of ire in her tone.

"We mourn Saphira - we remain steadfast for Es. We go on just like we have been - you keep driving; I'll keep watching; Opal will keep assisting and so on. When all is said and done, we'll be able to say we did our jobs. He won't be able to find fault with us."

"I'm not finding a lot of comfort in that right now."

"None of us are, Turq," Mal returned quietly. "But Es won't be able to find us lacking either, and for me, that's pretty important."

Ruby looked around the room and saw the silent agreement. She cleared her throat and waited until everyone was focused on her. "Well, Amber covered about everything I had to say. Does anyone else have anything they want or need to get off their chest about this?" Silence followed her query and Ruby nodded in satisfaction. "All right then - we've all got work to do. Amber, Coral and Mal - I think you should get back to your charges for now. I doubt anyone's going to be going anywhere this morning. The rest of you - go on upstairs and get some rest. If your bosses call, I'll let you know."

"What about you, Ruby?" Jade asked.

Ruby passed a hand over her eyes and shook her head. "I'm gonna stay down here and keep an ear out for Es. Matilda said the diner would remain closed until after the funeral."

"Wow," Jas commented softly. "Can they afford to do that?"

Ruby shrugged. "I wasn't gonna ask. She said they would do it for any death in the family." She sighed. "C'mon, you lot. Nothing is going to make this better. To bed with you," gesturing to one half of the Angels, "and back to work with the rest of you. Ame, are you...?"

Ame nodded. "I have to, since ostensibly I am already there. You'll let me know...?"

"Yes. The only reason I didn't call last night is I had no real information to share and Adam had to come first."

"I know, but finding out the way I did - I could live with never being caught flatfooted like that again."

"I think we all could agree with that. I certainly never expected...."

"Ruby? What are we going to do about Saphira?" Amber asked, causing everyone on their way out of the kitchen to stop in the doorway and wait for Ruby's reply. But before she could answer, Amber continued her question. "I mean... is Es gonna be able to plan a service for her?"

Ruby sighed. "I don't know, Amber. It's one of the things I need to talk to her about. If she can't, would you want to...?"

"Yes," the answer quiet but emphatically stated. "Saphira was my sister and that makes Es my family even beyond this," motioning around the room. "Even though I never expected to have to think about something like this, I would be honored to accept the responsibility if Es can't bring herself to say goodbye. We won't leave folks hanging, Ruby."

"All right. Come see me when you get back from Charisma's and we'll start making some decisions if Es can't."

"She can stay," Jade offered. "I'll go in her place."

"Would you...?"
"Are you sure?"

Jade nodded and smiled sadly. "Yes, I would and yes, I'm sure. I haven't done much during this mission except pick up the slack when I can, which hasn't always been a lot. This, however... this I can do, and make a difference."

"Thank you, Jade," Amber said sincerely. "I can't tell you...."

"You don't have to." She looked at Mal, Coral and Ame. "C'mon, guys... we've got work to do." They waved to the rest and disappeared from sight. Turq, Jas, Opal and Indi watched them go, then bid goodnight to Amber and Ruby, leaving them alone in the kitchen. They turned to the process of cleaning up, using the time to give them some semblance of peace. They'd shoulder their burdens directly, but it was nice to have a few minutes to settle themselves for the tasks ahead.

************

Kent wasn't at all surprised to find Okasa in the kitchen with Patrick when he crossed the threshold into Charisma's home. He was a little more surprised when he was directed upstairs to get some rest, but figured he could at least take the opportunity to check on Adam and get a hot shower.

He looked in on Adam, smiling when he saw his son sprawled in the abandoned sleep of the innocent. Kent pulled the blanket up over him a little higher and kissed Adam's cheek before letting himself back out of the room. He started towards his suite, then decided to check on Charisma as well.

A knock at her door went unanswered and he pushed the door open silently before crossing the room to stand beside the bed. He noted how young Charisma appeared when she was asleep and felt a wash of love for her sweep through him. He pushed her hair off her face, and Charisma blinked open sleepy blue eyes at him.

"Hi," Kent said softly.

"Hi. How was your trip down?" Charisma asked, blinking her eyes and unsuccessfully trying to stifle a yawn.

"Long. I just wanted to see how you were doing."

Charisma teared up, but refused to let them fall. She shook her head. "Ask me again when I've had more than an hour of sleep."

Kent nodded. "I'll let you get back to it then. I'm sorry this happened, Charisma. They seemed like such a lovely couple."

"They were. All I can think about is how Es is going to get through this. What I would do if...." Charisma broke off, realizing what she was saying and to whom she was saying it. "I'm sorry, Kent. I shouldn't... I mean I...."

He gave her a wry smile. "Why? Charisma, I knew the truth before you did, remember? Maybe you should take this as a sign... maybe you both should. We only have this day... this moment... this breath - what gives us the right to waste it as though we were entitled to the next one?"

Charisma took his hand in hers and squeezed it. "You would have been a great lawyer, Kent. Maybe I should have you plead my case to Brianna," closing her eyes and rubbing her forehead. The action caused her to miss the speculative gleam in Kent's eyes.

"Maybe you should go back to sleep for a little while. Government business will wait a few more hours. Do you know if any arrangements have been made?"

Charisma shook her head and snuggled further into the covers. "Ruby promised to call when she knew something."

"All right. Go back to sleep. I'll be downstairs with your parents when you get up, okay?" She nodded, her breathing deepening. He brushed a light kiss over her hair and stood up. "Goodnight, Charisma," he offered, then he slipped out the door and closed it silently behind him.



XC

It was close to noon when Brianna stumbled from her bedroom in search of Kay and food. Fortunately, she found them together in the kitchen and she smiled at the happy memories the scents wafting through the small room brought to her mind.

"Is that really...?"

"Yes," Kay said without turning from her task at the stove. "And we need to seriously discuss your food situation here, Bri. Fig Newtons, milk and wilted celery - are you kidding me?"

Brianna laughed and Kay shifted just enough to give her the stink eye. Brianna held up her hands in surrender and tried to get her emotions under control. "I'm sorry, Kay, but you sounded just like Okasa then... all 'Mama Bear'."

Kay raised an eyebrow. "That would probably be the 'Mama Bear' personality that I've been working on since Michelle was born. How'm I doing?"

"I'd say you were well on your way to becoming a professional. A little more practice and you could be an All-American." Brianna smiled at Kay's rolled eyes. "Thank you for coming down, by the way," she added seriously. "You didn't have to, but I'm glad you did."

"When I got your call last night, I wanted to be here for you and for Esmeralda if I could. Lee and I talked about it and we decided it was the right thing to do. My secretary isn't particularly thrilled, but when has she ever been?" asked with a knowing smirk that caused Brianna to shake her head.

"I can't believe Roscoe hasn't left you for greener pastures," Brianna commented as she moved to set the table.

"You calling her Roscoe always used to drive Lisa crazy, you know," Kay commented with a huff.

"Of course... that's why I did it," filling two glasses with ice and water. She put them on the table, then moved out if the way for Kay to set the hot skillet between them. Then they took their seats and began serving themselves.

"How are you?" Kay finally asked when the first of their hunger was sated. "You look more rested, but.... What's bothering you, Bri? I get that you're upset about a dear friend dying... that's perfectly natural, after all. But this is something else... something beyond that." Brianna glared and Kay covered her hand. "This is your friend and ex-lover asking, Bri - not Dr. Williams."

"Kay, you will *always* be Dr. Williams - you can't help but. She's as much a part of you as Fontana is a part of me. But I understand what you mean and I appreciate the concern."

"Then talk to me, Bri. I want to help if I can."

Brianna sighed. This really wasn't something she wanted to get into with her ex-lover, but Kay was probably the only person in the world in a position to understand. "I don't think there's anything you can do, Kay. I just... I keep seeing the expression on Es' face... the deadness in her eyes... hearing the anguish in her voice." She took a deep, shuddering breath and let her green eyes meet Kay's brown ones, the tears shimmering. "I can't imagine, Kay - if something like that happened to Cha...." Brianna broke off and shook her head. She would have stood and walked away, but Kay's hand kept her in place. She kept her focus on the table and chuckled mirthlessly. "I don't even have the right to think that way."

"Why? Why don't you have the right to wonder, Bri? When death hits close to home like this, it causes us all to rethink and wonder - to put ourselves in Esmeralda's place." Kay waited a minute, and when Brianna didn't reply, she took a deep breath and resumed her line of thought aloud. "Brianna, even though you and Charisma have never consummated the love between you, it doesn't mean that you love her less. If anything, Esmeralda's loss simply highlights what you've never been allowed to share with her. It certainly doesn't change the fact that you've loved her for half your life."

"It doesn't change the fact that I walked away from her either." This time when Brianna tugged on her hand, Kay let her go, understanding the anxiety Brianna felt. She watched as Brianna walked out of the kitchen and moved to stand in front of the windows in the living room. Kay took her time cleaning up the kitchen, noting Brianna kept her attention on what was going on outside, though Kay would have bet good money Brianna's thoughts were much closer to home.

When the kitchen was spotless, Kay walked out of the tiny room, crossing to stand just behind Brianna without touching her. "It doesn't have to stay that way, Bri."

Brianna was quiet for so long Kay wondered if Brianna had even heard her speak. She opened her mouth to reiterate her words when Brianna's soft whisper cut her off. "I don't know, Kay." She swiped at her face and turned back to meet Kay's eyes. "I'm going to go check on Es. Would you like to come with me?"

"Yeah. You want to shower first?"

"Go ahead. I'm going to call Ruby and let her know we're coming - see if there's anything we can bring."

"All right. I won't be but a minute." Then Kay headed for the bathroom and Brianna walked to the phone to make her call.

************

"MAMA!!" Adam greeted Charisma when she stepped into the family room where they were all gathered. She set her coffee cup down quickly to catch him in her arms and hug him close - so close that Adam started to squirm. "Mama... too tight!" pushing to loosen her grip.

Charisma loosened her hold and kissed Adam. "Sorry, son." Adam rewrapped his arms around her Charisma's neck and kissed her.

"Love Mama... Mama good."

"I love you too, son. Did you go to school today?" watching him shake his head. Charisma turned and met Ame's eyes, then looked at Kent for an explanation.

"We decided to keep him home today since his grandparents were in town," Kent replied. "I thought maybe he and Paddy and I could go out for a little while this afternoon." Charisma just nodded.

"Has anyone heard anything?" seeing negative shakes from every other adult in the room. "All right. I'm going to call Ruby and see what I can find out. Mama, would you like to go with me if Ruby thinks we could check on Es?"

"Yes, absolutely." Charisma nodded.

"Okay... let me make my call and we can go."

"You need to eat something first," Okasa chided. "And don't stand there and even think about arguing with me. It won't take but a minute to make you up a plate from lunch."

"Fine," Charisma grumbled, knowing any debate would be met with more aggravation than she was in the mood to tolerate today. Okasa headed to the kitchen and Charisma set Adam down. He ran back to Ame, taking the controller from her and returning his attention to the learning game she'd put in for him to play.

Charisma watched him for a moment, then turned and headed for her office to make her call. Patrick and Kent watched her go, then looked at one another. Patrick cocked an eyebrow. "Would you like to take that walk now?"

"I think that's a good idea."

************

Esmeralda felt the bed dip, but she kept her eyes closed. She assumed she was still dreaming, and saw no reason to leave a place where she could still feel Saphira's warmth surrounding her. Then the arms around her tightened and she felt the weight of Saphira's wings drape over them. Esmeralda released a trembling breath and shivered when she felt lips ghost over her neck.

"Where do Angels go when they die, love? Did the Father let you go home?"

There was no answer, but Esmeralda hadn't expected one. Instead, she willed herself to slip back into deeper sleep - into a place where she and Saphira were home together again. She never felt the bed shift when Amber stood, nor did she hear the door close gently behind her.

Amber looked up when Ruby cleared her throat; she crossed the threshold, then let her body slump and shook her head when Ruby cocked an eyebrow at her in question. Before either woman could speak, the phone rang and Ruby picked up the receiver. She shared a very brief conversation with Brianna and hung up the phone. Then she turned to Amber.

"That was Brianna - she asked if she could come by for a few minutes."

"Why? It's not like there's anything she can do."

"She wants to check on Es... see for herself how she's doing."

"She's dying, Ruby! What's to see?"

"Amber, it's how humans mourn - you should know that. How many years have you been doing this job?"

"Ruby, don't. Don't act like there is some sort of protocol involved here that we're supposed to be following. This is nothing like anything we've ever dealt with - Angels don't die and we've only ever had one other occasion to mourn."

"I know, honey, but this is something we have been witness to for years."

"Somehow witnessing didn't prepare us for the reality of how this feels."

"You're right, Amber... it didn't. So maybe we should let the mortals show us how to bear this... how to grieve. Maybe we can help each other."

The phone rang again and Ruby snatched it from the hook before it could ring twice. Another brief conversation and she was hanging up the second time, this time rubbing her forehead and releasing a long breath.

"Let me guess - Charisma is coming over too?"

"Yes. She and Okasa will be here shortly." Ruby paused and tilted her head towards the stairs. Amber frowned.

"Something wrong?"

"I don't hear anyone moving around upstairs. I'd have thought Jas and Turq would be getting a phone call... you know, to go pick up their respective Senators."

"It's not official business, Ruby."

"Not like that's always made any difference." Ruby waved her hands in dismissal and shook her head. "It doesn't matter - we need to get the rest of the girls up. They can't be wandering around here in corporal form."

"I'll take care of it," Amber said. "I need to get a little rest." She took a good look at Ruby. "So do you," gently cupping Ruby's face.

"I will, Amber. As soon as Brianna and Charisma have had their visit, I'll go lay down. I'm sure one of the girls not covering Brianna or Charisma will be willing to sit Shiva with Esmeralda for a little while."

"Any of us will, Ruby," Indi said from the doorway. "We heard the phone ring; figured we better come down and see what was going on."

Ruby quickly filled them in, and in only moments they had scattered to get dressed. Shortly after that, the house was empty, save Ruby in the kitchen, Esmeralda in the bedroom and Amber tucked away upstairs.

************

Brianna and Kay arrived first, scant minutes after the Angels disappeared around the corner. Ruby accepted the hug that Brianna offered and took Kay's hand when they were introduced. She led them into the kitchen and Brianna set down the sandwiches she'd brought with her.

"How are you, Ruby?" she asked solicitously. "I have a very good idea how Es is doing," she stated, "and I intend to check on her as well in just a few minutes. But you're the one that's going to have to be her rock until she can't do this without Saphira anymore. And knowing what's coming doesn't make it any easier. So... how are you?"

Kay blinked, clamping her jaw shut to keep her mouth from swinging open. She was amazed to see this rarely exposed side of Brianna's personality knowing Brianna didn't like the vulnerability this kind of caring placed on her. Kay watched silently and let Brianna comfort Ruby, knowing it was something Brianna needed to do for her sake as much as Ruby's.

"I'm tired," Ruby stated plainly. "I'm tired and I'm angry and I hurt. I hurt for myself because I'll miss Saphira, but I'm aching for Esmeralda too, and that makes the hurt worse." Both Brianna and Ruby were so focused on their conversation that they didn't hear the light rapping on the front door, but Kay did. She moved through the hall, knowing that anyone coming by today was either a friend come to offer comfort or someone that would need to be turned away until a later time. Either way, it was something she could do while Ruby cried a little of her distress out on Brianna's shoulder.

Kay reached the front door and recognized Okasa and Charisma immediately. She would have cursed under her breath but Charisma raised her hand to knock again, so she yanked the door open instead, putting her finger to her lips.

A flash of surprise followed by a look of resentment crossed Charisma's countenance for the split second it took for her to get her political mask in place. Kay idly hoped one day they could work past that, but now wasn't the time. Kay gestured them inside, and motioned towards the kitchen.

"Ruby is in there with Brianna. We haven't seen Esmeralda yet."

Charisma and Okasa nodded silently, then followed Kay into the kitchen. They removed their coats and placed them on an empty chair; Kay and Okasa stood back in unspoken support, even as Charisma moved forward to embrace Ruby on the side opposite Brianna.

For a few moments, there was just the sound of Ruby weeping; then she straightened and wiped her eyes. Charisma accepted the tissues Kay passed her with a grateful nod, and gave them to Ruby. Ruby wiped her eyes and reached a hand out to cover first Brianna's, then Charisma's. At that gesture, both women took a seat at the table again, one on either side of her. When Ruby remembered there were others in the room with them, she cocked an eyebrow at Brianna in question.

Brianna introduced Okasa, and Ruby invited them to sit. The stillness was awkward and unnerving and Charisma cleared her throat to break it.

"How is Es, Ruby?"

"Not well. She went straight to bed when we arrived home this morning, and she hasn't moved since then. I've been in several times to check on her, but she's still sleeping."

"Have any arrangements been made?" Brianna asked softly.

"I've spoken to Saphira's sister, Amber," seeing Brianna nod in recognition. "We're still waiting to hear from the hospital about the autopsy results, but she called them earlier. They should be able to release Saphira's body to us by tomorrow morning at the latest. I have already been in touch with the local funeral home. Saphira will be cremated, and we'll have a small service in two days."

"We'll let people know on our end," Charisma said. "I know there are a number of Senators who will want to be there for Es' sake. They were there when Rick came up to tell her the news." She paused thoughtfully. "I never realized so many on our floor stayed late - I never saw them."

"I doubt they saw you either, Charisma," Brianna offered with a smile. "After all, you were in the inner office working out of sight and sound of the rest. They were probably doing the same thing. I know I did. It's the best time of day to work and actually get things done - no schmoozing."

"And it's the only time of day to sit and chat with Es."

"This is true," Brianna agreed, then turned back to Ruby. "Is there anything we can do? Phone calls? Arrangements? A wake? Sitting with Es?"

"Oh Brianna - you don't know how much the offer means... all of it. But I wouldn't know who to call, and the arrangements won't take too long. The service is mostly so people can say their goodbyes to Saphira and speak to Es. As for a wake...."

"Let us do something, Ruby," Okasa piped in. "We would be honored if you'd let us take care of the wake."

"It's not that I don't appreciate the offer," Ruby replied slowly. "It's just that I'm not sure Esmeralda would attend."

"Ruby, if you'd like to have a wake, we'll get Esmeralda there and stand by her for as long as necessary," Charisma said. "But it's totally up to you; we're here to help... not to make things harder."

"I am grateful to all of you - you didn't have to be there last night and you certainly didn't have to come over here today. I can't ask you to stop your lives for this."

"What if we want to, Ruby? What if we choose to be here to support Es the only way we know how?"

"I won't say no," Ruby answered. "But I have to tell you not to expect much - I don't think she's said a dozen words to me since she woke up in the hospital earlier today."

"I don't think anyone here is expecting to exchange banter and dialogue, Ruby. It would be enough to be there for her... so she knows she's not alone," Kay said. "This is the hardest time to grieve - when it starts to set in that this is reality now. If we can make her burden easier to bear...."

Ruby smiled sadly. "Have you been through this yourself, Kay?" she asked. Kay shook her head and the sadness deepened. "Then you have some sort of training - a doctor or healer?" Kay nodded.

"I'm a psychiatrist."

"No offense, Doctor, but you have no idea what you're talking about. She is alone now - her mate is gone. There is no way to make that fact any easier to bear. That being said, I don't think there is any harm in keeping her company for a little while. Maybe she'll respond to one of you in a way she doesn't seem to be able to respond to me."

"How about if you go get some rest?" Brianna offered Ruby after an uneasy pause. "There are enough of us here to keep an eye on Es and answer the phone if it's needed. You need some sleep, and you've got friends here willing to help."

"Yes," Okasa said, jumping on the bandwagon. She stood and extended her hand. "C'mon. I'll make sure you get tucked in comfortably. Kay can go sit with Es for a little while and Brianna and Charisma will take care of notifying the people they need to contact. After that, we'll take turns keeping an eye on Es until you get back up again, all right?"

Ruby blinked. She was sure she should be arguing about this, but at the moment she was simply too tired to think clearly. Instead, she caught Okasa's hand in hers and let the other woman pull her to her feet. "I appreciate this," she admitted softly. "You don't know how much."

"I do," Okasa confessed. "Now let's get to it." She turned and looked at Kay. "I'll join you shortly. You two," motioning to Brianna and Charisma, "go into the living room to make your calls. No reason to disturb everyone with your talking. C'mon, Ruby - let's get you settled."

Brianna, Charisma and Kay watched them go then traded bemused smiles at the way they'd been maneuvered by Okasa. But without argument they split up to follow Okasa's directives. At least it was a positive contribution they could make while they waited.



Chapter XCI

Charisma and Brianna stepped into the living room and pulled the heavy door to without shutting it completely. Then they went to opposite corners to keep from disturbing one another as they began making their calls.

Brianna called Matilda first thing, wanting her to be the first to get the news. Then she called Indi followed by Jas, keeping the promise they had made to everyone at the hospital. When she was done with those three calls, she waited for Charisma to finish hers before she interrupted. Charisma simply cocked her head and waited and Brianna felt a bittersweet wave of memory wash over her.

"Brianna?" Charisma finally called softly when it appeared as though she wasn't going to speak. Brianna blinked and her focus sharpened as she returned to the present.

"What can I do for you, Charisma?"

"Well, that's what I was wondering actually. You seemed to want my attention, but then yours just kind of wandered off somewhere."

Brianna blushed slightly. "Oh... sorry. I was just trying to figure out whom to call next. I thought you might have a list of the Senators we needed to notify."

While Charisma believed Brianna was telling her the truth, she wasn't convinced it was the whole truth. Still, there were things to take care of before they could delve into anything else, so she merely nodded her head and looked at her phone.

"Do you have the numbers of the Senators on our floor in your phone?"

Brianna's eyes widened and she shook her head vehemently. "Are you kidding? I only have the numbers of those Senators that I deal with in committee and those only under duress. To be perfectly honest, I'm still not quite sure which Senators are *on* our floor."

Charisma laughed, and though it seemed a little out of place in the sepulcher quiet of the house, it didn't feel at all disrespectful. Instead, it was more of an emotional release, and they both knew that Es more than anyone would understand the need for that.

"Don't feel bad. I *do* know who is on our floor, but I've had years to learn. On the other hand, I don't have most of them programmed in to my phone either. So let me give Opal another call. She'll have to go to the house, but I do have a complete phone book there."

Charisma made her call, then it was just a matter of waiting for Opal to get to her home and call her back with the information they needed. The silence was a little bit awkward, so when Charisma cleared her throat, it caused Brianna's head to snap up. Charisma's blue eyes met Brianna's reticent green ones, holding them momentarily before she allowed hers to drop to her clasped hands.

"I read the letters you wrote," Charisma said softly. "I never thought... I never understood...."

Brianna shrugged, her discomfort acute. She moved to the window, feeling the cold of the glass as a welcome touch on her overheated skin. "Now you do," she finally replied when it became clear that Charisma was waiting for some sort of rejoinder from her.

"Now I do," Charisma conceded without hesitation. "If I had known - no, that's not fair. If I had been strong enough to acknowledge what I knew... or at least what I strongly suspected...." She sighed. "So much would be different, Bri." She saw Brianna's back stiffen in response, and Charisma bit her lips to keep the tears from spilling over onto her cheeks. Brianna never moved from her spot by the window, and Charisma took a deep breath. "I read your letters and they broke my heart, Bri - to know I was so close to having ev...." She broke off and shook her head. "And then to watch Es literally start to die in front of my eyes... knowing that Saphira's death is going to destroy her." Charisma paused, then decided she had nothing to lose by gambling everything. "All I've been able to think of is what if it had been you? What would I do if you were gone?"

Brianna sighed, her voice a bare whisper when she spoke. "You'd be all right, Charisma. You've lived without me before."

"But I was never happy, Bri, and I wouldn't want to - I don't want to ever again."

The ringing of Charisma's phone cut off the silence that dragged on with Brianna's lack of response. And by the time Charisma hung up, the moment was over and Brianna had reverted back to her polite, professional persona. It made Charisma want to cry; instead, she handed Brianna half the list and they set about making the necessary phone calls.

************

Kay took a moment to lean against the door and take in the room in front of her. There was a certain amount of natural curiosity, but much of it was in a professional capacity. It might give her some clue on a way to help Esmeralda. Because she couldn't dismiss the fact that everyone seemed convinced that Saphira's death would devastate Esmeralda, and if Kay could manage it, she would love to find a way to prevent that. So she looked around her, eager to find something she could use to relate to Esmeralda, because the closest she could come was her break-up with Brianna, and she knew that wasn't even in the same league as far as heartache went.

So she was caught completely by surprise when the bed emitted a raspy sounding voice.

"Would you like to come in or are you just gonna hover in the doorway?"

Kay's eyes immediately latched onto the green eyes just visible in the light of the afternoon sun that squeezed into the room via cracks in the curtains and blinds. Only years of practice and schooling allowed Kay to maintain the façade of polite interest and not reveal the sympathetic pain she felt at the agony Esmeralda's eyes revealed. She pushed off the door and broached the bed, stopping beside Esmeralda without touching her.

"How are you, Esmeralda?"

Esmeralda studied Kay for a long moment before she shifted and patted the space she'd just made. Kay cocked an eyebrow and Esmeralda just patted the space again. Kay took the hint and took a seat, waiting for Esmeralda to speak.

"You are Brianna's best friend, aren't you?" When Esmeralda spoke again, her words were unexpected, and Kay frowned hard as she processed them. Then she tilted her head, wondering why Esmeralda wanted to know such a thing now. Surely she had other things on her mind... things she'd rather talk about and remember. Kay jerked out of her brown study when she felt soft, warm fingers massage away the wrinkles on her forehead. She returned her eyes to Esmeralda's who managed to give her a sad smirk. "I'm not asking you to cure cancer," Esmeralda reassured Kay quietly. "I just want to know if you're Brianna's best friend - if you're someone who looks out for her best interests despite herself."

"I try," Kay sputtered. "I'm not always successful."

"No one is," Esmeralda informed her. "Not even Saphira and I could manage that all the time."

"Would you like to talk about Saphira, Esmeralda?" Kay asked compassionately when she was silent for a few minutes. Esmeralda shook her head.

"There's nothing to talk about, Kay. She's gone, and this time there's no possibility of her coming back to me." She smiled weakly. "I appreciate the offer though... even if it was done from a professional perspective."

"Maybe a little," Kay shrugged. "It is what I do after all. But mostly it was done as a friendly gesture. I know we don't know one another all that well, but Brianna loves you and considers you to be a good friend, and we take care of our friends... just like they were family. So if you ever want to talk and need someone to listen...."

"I won't," Esmeralda said so softly that Kay had to lean down to catch her words. "But thank you."

Another few minutes passed and Kay cleared her throat, waiting for Esmeralda to meet her eyes. "Why did you ask about Brianna? About my friendship with her?"

"You know the story - about her and Charisma?" Kay nodded her head. "Don't let her miss an opportunity to be happy, Kay." That was all Esmeralda said, then she closed her eyes and rolled over to put her back to Kay. Kay sat there for a few minutes longer without moving; only when the door opened did she shift and only enough to see Okasa poke her head in the door.

Kay rose from her seat and trod lightly to the door, gesturing with her chin and following Okasa back out to the kitchen.

"How is she?" Okasa inquired softly. Kay shook her head.

"It's hard to say, Mama O. She seems to have already accepted Saphira's death, but the depth of her sorrow is staggering. I can practically feel it emanating from her very being." Kay paused and pinched her lip while she contemplated her words. "I don't think she is suicidal, but I now understand why everyone is so concerned with Esmeralda surviving this loss. There's no will to live there."

"Can I see her? Can I talk to her?"

Kay nodded slowly. "You can try." She placed a hand on Okasa's arm. "Don't be surprised if she doesn't really respond well, Mama. She's withdrawing into herself. I've never seen grief like this before... so all-consuming."

Okasa bit her lip. "I wonder if that's because of the way they saw themselves."

Kay angled her head to one side. "Because they saw themselves as mates and not merely partners?" seeing Okasa nod. "You may be right. Esmeralda is behaving like part of her is missing... the part that kept her going throughout her sickness... a part she needs to be able to survive, much less live." Kay held up her hands. "I know that when half of a couple dies, the other half suffers. When you've been part of someone's life for that long, something *is* missing." She shook her head. "But this is more - like when the soul has left the body and only the shell remains... not even realizing that it's already dead and just waiting to catch up."

"Kay...."

"I know. I know it sounds weird, all right? Trust me... I'm not real comfortable trying to articulate this out loud... even to you, Mama. But you need to understand how serious I think this is." Kay took a deep breath and swallowed hard. "If something was to happen to Lee or Brianna or you, I would be heartbroken because you've all been a part of my heart and life for nearly twenty years - and for Lee it would be even more true because he is my husband and the father of my children."

"As it would be for me, Kay. What's your point?"

Kay glared. "My point," she complained with a growl, "is that while I would be heartbroken... devastated, even... I would survive. First I would do it for my kids, but then I would do it for me. I don't think Esmeralda has any desire to do that. The will to live is gone, replaced by unfathomable pain."

"And yet you don't think she is suicidal," Okasa commented flatly.

"No, I really don't. I don't think she needs to be - her soul is already gone, Mama. She just needs for her body to recognize that fact."

Okasa rubbed her fingers over her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose as she blew out a frustrated breath. "For mercy's sake - that is simply wretched. And there's nothing we can do to make a difference?"

Kay shrugged and shook her head. "I don't think so. But it can't hurt to give it our best effort either. Talk to her, Mama. Maybe she'll listen to you."

"What did you say to her, Kay?"

"Nothing, really," blowing out an impatient breath. "She didn't really give me a chance to. She told me not to let Brianna miss an opportunity to be happy, then she turned her back."

"That's it?"

"That's it," Kay confirmed.

Okasa blew out a breath. "All right. Let me see if I can do something to help. If Charisma and Brianna get done with their phone calls...."

"I'll ask them to wait until you come back out," Kay offered.

"Thank you," Okasa said, and tapped lightly on Esmeralda's door before letting herself into the room.

************

Charisma finished up the last of her phone calls before Brianna did, so she sat quietly in her corner while Brianna shared the news with the last Senator on her list. When she was done, she leaned back and closed her eyes as she blew out an exhausted breath.

"That's everyone on my list. Everyone is planning to be at the service. They were asking what they could do."

Charisma leaned back in her chair and stretched. "What did you tell them?"

"I started to tell them to talk to you about it, since you're the senior here and all," Brianna replied as she sat up and focused her gaze on Charisma. "Then I figured since Okasa was planning to host the wake at your home, maybe I shouldn't add any more responsibility to your load. So I asked Stephen and Elizabeth to take up a collection. We'll have an arrangement sent and give the rest to Es. If she feels it's too close to charity to accept it for herself, we'll donate it in her name and Saphira's to whatever charity she chooses."

"That seems reasonable."

"I can be, on occasion."

"I seem to remember that," Charisma offered with a smile. Brianna averted her eyes and gathered up the paper she'd been using, folding it carefully and sticking it into her back pocket to dispose of later. She was confident none of the Senators listed there wanted their private information floating around and Esmeralda didn't have a shredder she could run it through. Not that she expected Esmeralda to use them of course, but she couldn't simply throw them away either. All this was running through her mind as she rose and started to make her way out of the living room. A hand on her elbow caused Brianna to jerk out of her inner thoughts and nearly clock Charisma in the head.

Brianna blinked. "Hey... you all right?"

Charisma blew out a shaky breath. "I'm going to hope that was a reflex and not directed at me specifically," she said with a smile, though Brianna could clearly read the doubt in her gaze.

"Yeah... sorry. I was thinking." She shook her head, though she didn't say anything else. "Should we go see if we can talk to Esmeralda?

Charisma frowned. "Are you avoiding the question, Brianna?"

Brianna's brows shot into her hairline. "Um... what question?"

"Do you think we could...?" Charisma looked down at her clenched hands, then back at Brianna. "Look, Bri - all this has really thrown me for a loop. Seeing what Saphira's death has done to Esmeralda in just the few short hours since she died; all that keeps running through my brain is what if it had been you? What would I do if something like this happened to you?" She held up her hands to keep Brianna from interrupting. "I know what you said - that I've lived without you before and I could do it again. But the truth is, I wouldn't want to... I *don't* want to. I just... I'd love if we could just let bygones be bygones and start over," seeing the walls coming up in Brianna's dulled green eyes. Charisma paused and looked at the ground before taking a deep breath and forcing herself to meet Brianna's shuttered expression. "I know this whole situation is my fault - I'm willing to accept the blame for our entire separation. Can't we be friends again?"

"I told you, Charisma... we will always be friends...."

"You lied!" Charisma accused, and Brianna flushed as anger swept through her body.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me - you lied. You said we would always be friends, but you pulled away from the family... not just ME, but the entire family! Do you know how upset the kids were when they found out Auntie Bri wasn't coming for Christmas?? Do you know the riot act I got read by your ex-lover for upsetting everyone because I caused your disappearance from the family??"

"Charisma...."

"No, Brianna - you weren't there. You didn't see the kids' disappointment or have to try and explain to your brothers why someone whom they'd treated as family for nearly twenty-five years had simply tossed them away like yesterday's garbage!! You didn't have to see Mama act like her heart wasn't broken by someone she considered to be another daughter to her. So no, Brianna - you don't get to stand there and try to take the moral high ground with me!"

"This is how you win friends and influence people, Charisma?" Brianna snorted and Charisma refused to give her the satisfaction of responding. "You should probably work on your technique."

"You think this is funny?" Charisma asked, the pain apparent in her voice. Brianna's features hardened.

"This was never funny to me, Charisma. Don't you dare make light of what this is to me - what it was to me for almost twenty years. And regardless of the nobility," said with more than a hint of a sneer in her tone, "of your actions in trying to accept responsibility for the fiasco our interaction has become, the fact is we share the blame equally. I was the one that bolted, Charisma; you were the one that let me go. And no amount of wishing and hoping is going to change those two little facts. I'm not finished," Brianna said fiercely when Charisma opened her mouth to interrupt.

"I can't just forget that, Charisma - I can't forget that I fell in love with you and you fell in love with me and still we couldn't be together because of your need to adhere to the moral code of people I don't know and couldn't care less about! I can't forget that even now you can't admit that you love me... not even to yourself! And I certainly can't forget that you refuse to be honest with both of us." Brianna paused for a breath. "I could live with the fact that we can't be together, Ri... I already have for almost half my life, and I told you before that I'm not a home wrecker. But I can't and I won't pretend what I feel for you isn't real. And that's basically what you're asking me to do. NO. I won't do it. You don't get to have it both ways any more, Charisma."

"Would you two like to tone it down before you wake up Ruby and Esmeralda?" Kay asked, sticking her head through the narrow opening of the door. "I know you've got things to settle, but here and now may not be the best option available. Don't," she commanded. "Either one of you. Right now, you should be focused on what you can do for Esmeralda. The rest you can worry about when she's taken care of, all right?" Kay held their eyes impassively when they both glared in her direction. "Don't bother - I have teenagers. AND I have Mama on my side." She almost chuckled when their eyeballs widened comically. "Now, settle down, and go see Esmeralda. We'll talk about the rest later," holding up a hand and pointing when they would have argued.

Brianna and Charisma exchanged looks, then moved as one into Esmeralda's room. Kay waited until the door was closed before she allowed herself to slump just slightly. Okasa walked up behind her and patted her back.

"Good job, Kay."

Kay shrugged. "Jury's still out on that. C'mon... let's go check on Ruby."



Chapter XCII

Charisma walked around to the side of the bed that Esmeralda was facing and knelt down beside her. Brianna followed at a slower pace, but chose to stand behind and to one side of Charisma. Charisma reached out a tentative hand towards Esmeralda, lightly brushing the hair away from her face. To their mutual surprise, Esmeralda didn't even react to the touch. Charisma turned her head until blue eyes met green, and she took comfort in the wash of emotions she found there.

"Es?" Charisma whispered, wondering if Esmeralda had finally gone to sleep and found a measure of peace. That thought was dismissed, however, when Esmeralda blinked open her eyes... revealing a depth of pain Charisma could hardly comprehend. "Oh, Sweetheart," she murmured, cupping Esmeralda's face gently.

Esmeralda covered her hand but offered nothing else. Brianna stepped forward and placed her hand on Esmeralda's. "I know there's nothing we can do or say to make this better for you, Es. But we're here."

The smile Esmeralda tendered was achingly sad, but it was far preferable to the dead expression that had resided on her countenance previously. "That means everything," she replied, her voice so low that they had to strain to understand her words. When they did, it brought tears to their eyes.

"Would you like us to stay?" Charisma asked. "At least until you go to sleep?"

"That might be a very long time," Esmeralda answered honestly. "I close my eyes and all I see is emptiness. She's not in my dreams, and she promised me forever. She should be in my dreams."

Esmeralda's vehemence was astonishing and it stunned Brianna and Charisma into utter stillness. They exchanged glances, silently debating which of them was going to tackle the minefield Esmeralda had just laid out in front of them. Finally, Charisma turned back to Esmeralda, stroking her thumb over the planed cheekbone beneath her hand.

"Why do you think that, Es? Once we die, the soul moves on - it doesn't have a choice."

"Not Saphira," Esmeralda insisted. "She promised," her voice hard and firm.

"Even if she promised, Es, she still has to figure out how to find you. You need to give her a little while," Brianna said. "This is all new for her too, and I imagine she's got a lot to learn before she can visit your dreams."

"You really think so?"

"I really do."

"I hope so, Brianna. I miss her so much."

"I know you do, Es. I miss her too, and she was only my friend." Charisma tilted her head and motioned with her eyes, and after a moment, Brianna took the hint she was fairly certain Esmeralda hadn't seen. Brianna lifted the hand on Esmeralda's and pulled Esmeralda's hand into her own. Charisma smiled her thanks and began to gently scratch Esmeralda's scalp. Involuntarily, Esmeralda's eyes closed and Brianna nodded her approval. "Go to sleep, Es. Maybe the reason she can't find you is because you're not really sleeping."

"I s'pose," Esmeralda mumbled, forcing her eyes to open briefly despite the low melody she could hear buzzing in the background of her hearing. "Do you really think she'll come, Brianna?" eyes closing again against her conscious wishes.

"I really do, Es... but you've got to go sleep first. I'm not saying anything will seem better when you wake up, but at least sleep will give you a respite." Esmeralda didn't answer and Brianna turned her gaze to Charisma, who was still combing through Esmeralda's hair as she hummed a soft lullaby. "Is she sleeping?"

Charisma didn't stop the sound of her voice or the motion of her hands, but simply nodded her head. Her agreement notwithstanding, Charisma kept up her activities for another few minutes and Brianna remained still, holding Esmeralda's hand lightly. When they were both assured by her deep, measured breathing that Esmeralda had truly fallen asleep, they eased away from her and moved silently to the door. Only once they were standing outside the bedroom did they speak.

"You're really good at that," Brianna commented softly. Charisma shrugged.

"Lots of practice with Adam. Sometimes he gets so wound up by the day he's having that getting him to sleep can be challenging."

Brianna's eyebrows arched into her forehead. "Really? I thought he just kind of dropped off when the excitement stopped."

"Usually he does, but some days he just can't seem to wind down fast enough. Those days, when I'm home, I tuck him in and sing to him while I rub his back or scratch his head." She shrugged again. "It's what Mama always did for us when we were kids. I figure if it worked on a pistol like me, it would probably do the same for my son." She paused. "What about you? You seemed to know just what to say to Es to give her some comfort... however briefly."

Brianna shook her head. "I don't know. Maybe it's the conversations I've had with the nieces and nephews over the years. Or maybe it's just the writer in me coming out."

"Have you given any more thought to that, by the way?" Charisma pressed. "About our nieces and nephews, I mean." Brianna growled.

"Charisma...."

"Brianna, please. You don't have to do it for me or Mama or you even. But the kids...."

"Charisma...." Brianna blew out an impatient breath to keep her voice from rising in anger. Charisma remained prudently silenced by the ire that Brianna turned in her direction. After another moment of contemplation, Brianna's gaze softened and she resumed her quiet modulated tone. "What about the kids, Charisma... especially Adam? Have you thought about what any of this would mean to him?"

"In what way, Brianna? The only difference is you'd be in his life more - he'd have another adult in his immediate family that loved him to distraction. I'm not really sure where you think there's a downside to that particular situation."

"That's not what I meant, Charisma. Please don't play stupid - it doesn't suit you."

Charisma glared at her. "Spell it out for me, Brianna... so I'm perfectly clear."

"Fine. With you and Kent separated, even on a trial basis, you've left yourself wide open for all kinds of rumors and innuendo. You know the things that Scott Patterson was saying when we were simply trying to be friends on the Hill - lunch together was enough to start conspiracy theories running rampant. Now, if I was to step forward and become a more prominent part of Adam's life, if only in a friendly capacity, what do you think would get said then, Charisma? I'm not exactly in the closet."

"I don't...."

"And what of Laura Maxwell, Ri?" Brianna continued as though Charisma hadn't even spoken. "You know and I know that she's heading the team that is grooming you for your run for the White House in a couple years. She told me as much without actually committing to anything. Are you seriously ready to give up that dream forever? Because you're the one who told me image is everything."

"I'm not sure I'd have to," Charisma said slowly, though Brianna couldn't tell if it was because she was unsure or simply thoughtful in her answer. Brianna gave Charisma a look of complete disbelief.

"Charisma, I don't know what has gotten into you, but in case you've forgotten, down here on good old planet Earth? In your world, even a hint of impropriety could cost you everything you've worked your whole life for. As far as your constituents and the country at large are concerned, there can't be a hint of scandal near you or you're out. It doesn't matter if it's true or not, and you and I both know that. And I refuse to get back into the closet, Charisma... even for you." Brianna paused, then asked in a quieter tone, "Does Maxwell even know the truth about us?"

"Yours or mine?" Charisma replied bitingly, still stinging from Brianna's words. Brianna just shook her head, and stepped back and around Charisma.

"That right there pretty much says it all," she commented. "Please tell Kay I needed some air. She'll know where to find me," and without another word, Brianna left the house, ensuring she closed the door silently behind her.

Charisma sat stock still, torn between fury at Brianna's presumption and veneration at Brianna's consideration. It was a long time before she moved into the living room to wait.

************

Kay and Okasa stood on the stairway listening to the harsh whispers that emanated from just outside Esmeralda's door. Neither of them could make out the words, though both knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Brianna and Charisma were at it again. They traded looks, wondering what the hell had set them off *this* time. When they heard the front door close softly behind Brianna's retreating form, Okasa turned inquisitive eyes to Kay.

"Where would she go?"

Kay shrugged. "Here? Any number of places are possible. She's spent a lot of her off time exploring the sights around town. But," holding up a hand when Okasa's lips parted to speak, "if she didn't go home, she's probably at the National Gallery. She's particularly fond of the representation of Diana that's housed there."

"Well, if she went home, I can't get in to talk to her anyway. But if she went to the Gallery...."

"Okasa, are you sure this is a good idea? Maybe I should...."

"Kay, please. I can't reach her any other way. She's shut me out of her life and I'm trying to respect that... really. But at least if we meet in a public place, she might let me say goodbye properly."

Kay pinched her nose between her thumb and forefinger. She wasn't completely convinced that letting Okasa do this was a good idea, but she understood the older woman's need for closure. She nodded her head slowly. "All right, Mama. I'll try to find her and let you know where she is. Just...."

"I know, Kay. Thank you." She squeezed Kay's arm and bundled up, then headed out to find her wayward daughter. Kay shook her head and picked up her phone, hoping she was doing the right thing for everyone.

************

"Where are you?" Kay asked brusquely as soon as Brianna answered her call. Brianna had debated for several very long seconds before deciding it would be prudent to answer, if only to put Kay's mind at ease. Now she was questioning the wisdom of that decision. She sighed loudly.

"I told Charisma to tell you - I needed some air."

"So you went to the Gallery?"

Brianna frowned. "Yes, I went to the Gallery. Kay, I know you mean well, but I just need a little time to myself at the moment. Can I call you back in a few?"

"Let me say my piece, Bri, and then you can call me back when you're ready." Kay waited, then took Brianna's silence for the acquiescence it was. Kay mutely gave thanks for the years of trust and understanding they had between them that allowed them to appreciate one another like they did. She sighed and then blurted, "Okasa is on her way to you," wincing when she felt Brianna's gasp. "We saw you storm out the door and she asked for a chance to say goodbye to you... get some form of closure to the snarl your relationship has become. I told her where I suspected you would go - either home, where you couldn't be reached, or the Gallery. I called to let you know so you could make a decision."

"I see," Brianna replied flatly. "Thank you, Kay. I have to go." And then all Kay heard was dial tone.

"Well, I've done all I can do at the moment. Maybe I should go check on the people still under this roof in need of care." She closed her phone and headed back towards Esmeralda's bedroom.

************

Brianna debated for several very long minutes on the information Kay had shared with her. Her finger was actually poised over the speed dial key for Jas when she instead locked her phone and shoved it into her pocket. Despite her desire for a clean break from the Taghertys, it seemed she was destined to keep encountering them... at least casually. There was no reason not to allow Okasa the chance to say goodbye if that was truly what she desired to do. And if it wasn't, Jas was just a phone call away.

Brianna moved to stand in front of Diana, marveling as she always did at the strength and beauty the artist had infused into the sculpture. Even as she stared, she felt a peacefulness roll through her - her shoulders relaxed and she could feel her tension dissolving. She only had to do this for another year and some months and then it wouldn't matter. And until then, she had Diana when she needed a little strength.

Brianna heard the footsteps approaching her, but she didn't take her eyes from the statue or turn to face the sound. The steps became hesitant, but they didn't stop until Okasa was standing by her side.

They stood together looking at the art, and Brianna found it didn't bother her to share this private space with a woman who had been more mother to her than her own had ever been. Just as she was ready to break the surprisingly comfortable silence, Okasa spoke.

"What do you see... when you look at her?" never taking her eyes off the sculpture.

"I see strength and beauty and possibilities." Brianna turned her head and looked at Okasa. "What about you?"

Okasa chuckled mirthlessly. "I see what men wishes she was. She has no flaws - a mere human woman could never compete."

"Mama...."

Now Okasa turned and met Brianna's eyes, shaking her head even as she laid a hand on Brianna's arm. "Don't, Brianna... please. I know how impossible this situation has become for you, and I don't blame you for needing to create a place without Taghertys in it," giving Brianna a sad smile. "Despite what I would like to see happen...." Okasa broke off and shook her head again, dropping her gaze to the ground. Brianna didn't interrupt. "That doesn't matter. What does matter is that I wanted you to know that we all understand your reasons for saying goodbye, and if circumstances ever change that allow you to come back to the family, we will always welcome you with open arms."

"Mama...." tears pooling in Brianna's eyes.

"Shh, Sweetheart. I know. Just know that we love you, all right?" squeezing the arm beneath her hand before attempting to remove it. Okasa froze when Brianna covered her hand with her own, and she looked into green eyes again, catching her breath at the depth of sadness that was revealed to her. It reminded her very much of Esmeralda's and when Brianna opened her arms for a hug, Okasa stepped forward with alacrity... thrilled at the opportunity being offered.

For a while they just stood together, gently rocking back and forth. Finally, Brianna loosened her grip and took a step back. She raised a hand to Okasa's face, tenderly wiping away the tears that had escaped from Okasa's eyes before swiping her own away hastily.

"I love you, Mama. I love all of you. I just... I can't."

"I know, Sweetie... we all do." Okasa sighed. "I think we spoiled Charisma when she was growing up," chuckling at Brianna's smirk. "Okay... so I *know* we spoiled Charisma when she was growing up. Unfortunately, now she thinks she's entitled - that if she wants, she can find a way to have."

"Not this time, Okasa."

"I know, Brianna... not this time. It's well past time she was honest with herself... with you... with us." Okasa bit her lips momentarily, then sighed. "However, that is neither here nor there, and really isn't of any concern to you any longer. Thank you."

Brianna frowned. "For...?" when Okasa didn't continue.

"In part for not running away when you knew I was coming to find you, because I am fairly confident that Kay called you the minute I left the house. But mostly, thank you for allowing us to be your family… to be in your life for the last quarter-century. You're an amazing woman, Brianna Walker, and I'm proud to say that I know you... and that I knew you when."

Brianna leaned forward and brushed her lips across Okasa's cheek and Okasa did the same in return. Then without another word, Okasa spun on her heel and walked away... never looking back.

Brianna watched her go until even the clack of Okasa's shoes could no longer be heard ringing over the marble floor. Then she headed out the opposite door without so much as a glance in Diana's direction.

************

Kay found Charisma staring sightlessly out the window when she entered the living room some time later. Ruby was still sleeping peacefully, but Esmeralda had her a little concerned. And though loath to disturb whatever thought process Charisma seemed to be focused on, Kay needed to ask her a few questions. So she stepped closer to Charisma, only to find herself pinned by lost blue eyes before she was within touching distance.

"Something I can do for you, Doc?" her exhaustion clear in her tone.

"I wanted to ask you about Esmeralda," Kay replied after a long hesitation. Though that had been her original intent, she now wondered what had happened to make Charisma's defeat so apparent. However, she could only tackle one issue at a time, and Esmeralda had to be the priority. Once she was taken care of, though....

Charisma's eyes sharpened. "What about her?"

"Did she go to sleep when you were with her?"

"Yes... why?"

"Because I think she has gone beyond sleep now, and I'm concerned."

"You checked on her?"

"Just now. And if I didn't know better, I'd swear she was in a coma."

Charisma sucked in a breath and grabbed Kay's hand, pulling her unceremoniously towards Esmeralda's room. "Come on. It's up to us to do something. I don't know what, before you ask, but we've got to try."

"All right," Kay agreed. "Lead the way."



Chapter XCIII

Esmeralda let the sound of Charisma's voice and the feel of fingers combing through her hair ease her into a place she couldn't seem to find on her own anymore. She never realized when she fell asleep, and she had no way of knowing how much time had passed before she slipped into a deeper rest - one that would allow Saphira to find her... if she was able to look.

She felt the warmth on her face first and she smiled at the memories it recalled to the forefront of her mind. Esmeralda blinked her eyes and looked around carefully - things seemed so familiar, and yet she was willing to bet she had never actually been to wherever HERE was.

It reminded her a little bit of home before they'd been expelled. Not *their* home necessarily, but just HOME.

It was bright and clean and airy - noticeably so. There was no smell of gasoline; no tang of pollution; no stench of burning or mildew or garbage. There was only clean, and it made Esmeralda take a deep breath. She sighed in appreciation and took another look around, noting the green of the leaves on the trees and the scent of the flowers that covered the meadow she was currently ensconced in. She looked up and saw the blue of the sky and the puffiness of the white clouds that moved slowly across its surface, propelled by a gentle wind.

This wasn't home, however... at least not as far as she could tell. There were no other living beings from what she had observed - no animals, no Angels of any order and no Father. So where was HERE? And why was she here instead of home... or at least in the home she and Saphira had shared during their time as mortals on the human plane? Because she knew that was where she'd been - she distinctly remembered their life together there... her assignment. She even recalled Charisma and Brianna putting her to bed before she came... well, wherever here was. She wondered if she should be more concerned about where here was and how she'd found this place, and then decided to enjoy the respite for what it was. All too soon Esmeralda knew she'd have to return to the reality that was now hers... with Saphira dead and her left alone to finish a mission she no longer believed had any chance of succeeding.

Right here, right now, she could be the Esmeralda she had once been. She could be home again, an angel fully restored to her birthright and position waiting for Saphira to return from whatever errand she'd been sent on. She rolled from her side to her back, wincing a little at the brightness that momentarily blinded her but smiling again at the warmth that she could feel soaking into her bones. She felt like she hadn't been warm in so long.

Esmeralda spent some time simply watching the clouds, finding pictures and stories in the shapes that floated above her. It had been something she'd spent an endless amount of time doing in her other life when she was waiting for Saphira to return to her, and she enjoyed the opportunity to indulge herself again... even if it was only some sort of make-believe. Eventually, however, the warmth made her drowsy and she closed her eyes and turned to lay on her side. And when her reality shifted again, it was even better than the one she'd been in previously.

She felt Saphira surround her... in the most literal sense of the word - she felt the warmth of her body; the weight of her wings; the strength of her embrace. Esmeralda kept her eyes carefully closed, unwilling to lose this feeling again as she had when Amber had tried to offer her a semblance of comfort before. Esmeralda relished the sensations - unlike before, everything just felt right about this. Then she inhaled deeply... and froze.

The spicy scent that Esmeralda had always associated with Saphira filled her nostrils and she bit her bottom lip to keep from crying out... though whether it was in pain and frustration or relief and gratitude she couldn't have rightly said.

She didn't move; she didn't cry out. Instead Esmeralda squeezed her eyes shut tighter and simply concentrated on breathing. But she couldn't stop the shudders that traveled through her body and she felt the arms around her tighten in an effort to help stabilize her reaction.

After several long moments, Esmeralda felt the tremors slow and the warmth begin to radiate around her. It was only then that she heard the slow, steady pulse of a heartbeat and she couldn't stop the gasp that escaped her lips. And when the whisper of breath caressed her ears, Esmeralda couldn't stop the tears that slid down her face.

"Open your eyes for me, Es," Saphira commanded in a low tone. Esmeralda shook her head. "C'mon, baby... open those beautiful green eyes for me. I need to see them."

"No," she whispered. "If I open my eyes, the dream stops. And I don't want that to happen; I need this to be real."

"It is, Sweetheart. Trust me - open your eyes."

Again Esmeralda shook her head, biting her lip until she felt soft, warm fingers gently trace it. Then she couldn't halt her response.

Esmeralda released her lip from her teeth, sighing when Saphira continued her ministrations. Slowly, much slower than she would have allowed herself to believe possible, Esmeralda's eyes fluttered open.

At first there was nothing to see - she was still in the meadow with the flowers around her and the blue, cloud-studded sky above her. But she was turned on her side and behind her.... Behind her she could still feel Saphira's body tightly hugging her own. She could feel the calloused fingers tenderly tracing her swollen lip. But more convincing than either of those two sensations was the scent that surrounded her - one that she had only ever known to belong to Saphira.

Esmeralda took a deep breath. "Saphira?"

"Hello, love."

Esmeralda's eyes slammed shut again, not quite willing to believe her ears. Saphira sighed and gently lifted her body away from Esmeralda's just enough to roll Esmeralda onto her back. Saphira tucked her body into Esmeralda's letting one wing cover Esmeralda's body even as she started brushing light kisses up Esmeralda's neck. Only when Esmeralda's hands came up to her shoulders and pushed her away did Saphira cease her attentions and frown. This certainly wasn't the reunion she had pictured for them.

With her eyes still squeezed shut, Esmeralda took a shuddering breath. Saphira remained still, realizing her hasty actions had thrown Esmeralda's mind and body into something of a quandary. So she stayed quiet, allowing Esmeralda a chance to acclimate herself to the reality of this time and place.

"Saphira?" came the whispered word at long last.

"Yes, beloved?"

"Is it really you?" the sound tearing at Saphira's heart.

"Yes, beloved. Open your eyes for me. I promise... it'll be all right."

Esmeralda took one deep breath and then another, trying to get her thundering heartbeat under control. Saphira recognized the tactic and placed a hand over Esmeralda's heart. That touch made the tears well behind her eyelids and Esmeralda blinked rapidly to keep them from falling. When her vision finally cleared, the first thing she saw were deep blue eyes filled with love gazing back at her.

Immediately, she tucked her head into Saphira's neck and held on tightly. Saphira wrapped Esmeralda in her embrace, and for an endless time there was nothing but them.

After a while, Esmeralda looked up from the safest place she'd ever known and smiled into the blue eyes regarding her with honest, pure affection. "How...? Where...? Saphira...?"

Saphira's eyes never lost the love that shone from them, but with Esmeralda's words, they became tinged with sadness. "I'm sorry, love. I never expected... never thought...." She sighed and folded her wings back into her body before rolling over onto her back and bringing Esmeralda to lie on top of her.

"Saphira?"

Saphira sighed once more, deciding to try a different track. There were so many things she couldn't share with Esmeralda yet, but she couldn't bear the agony so plainly written on Esmeralda visage. "I'm not sure where HERE is either. It reminds me of our meadow back home and yet it's different."

"How did you find me if you don't know where here is?"

Saphira shrugged. "He allowed it. There is still work for you to do, Sweetheart. You can't mourn yourself to death."

Esmeralda stiffened in Saphira's arms, and it was only an eternity of knowledge that permitted Saphira to keep her there when Esmeralda would have bolted. "What did you say?" Esmeralda growled, the flames in her eyes searing.

"You can't mourn yourself to death, love. There is still work to do," knowing reflexively it was the wrong tack to take, but not sure what to say to make Esmeralda understand the importance of things without saying too much.

"I don't care," Esmeralda stated firmly. "He took you from me. There is nothing left."

Saphira sighed. She didn't understand *why* He'd placed the restrictions on her He had, but there was nothing to be done for it at this point in time. Things had to play out to their logical conclusion. She tenderly cupped Esmeralda's face in her hands, stroking the fine cheekbones with her thumbs and watching Esmeralda's eyelashes flutter beneath her touch.

"Es... I want you to listen to me. I know this is hard for you - I KNOW, all right? It's killing me too... here," placing a hand over her heart. "And here," touching her temple. "But I also know... KNOW, Es, beyond a shadow of a doubt that when this is over we'll be together again. But you have to finish the job first, love - you can't leave Charisma and Brianna hanging like this. They deserve better."

"Give me your sword then - I'll go knock some sense into them."

Saphira laughed and Esmeralda's eyes welled with tears again at the sound. "Oh Es - if that would work, you'd be out of a job. And frankly, I'd never get done with mine." Saphira squeezed Esmeralda tight when she felt her light chuckle turn to harsh sobs.

"I can't do this, Saphira. I can't do this alone... not without you. Not knowing you're...." She growled and pushed up and away from Saphira. "How could you do this to me?? How could you just up and die and leave me here to do this by myself??"

Saphira rose to stand behind Esmeralda, close enough to touch, but not quite doing so. "It wasn't my choice to die, love. I'd never have chosen to leave you like that." She paused briefly. "Es, you're not by yourself - not on Earth and not in your heart. I'll always be there. And when you really, really need me, I'll be here too. We can't stay here," cutting Esmeralda off before she could voice that as her chosen option, "but we can spend a little time here together when you need to until your work is done."

"And when this assignment is finished?" knowing that He would determine her need.

"We'll see what happens when the time comes, Es. But I will always be with you… never doubt that."

Esmeralda stood stock still for a very long time, able to feel Saphira's warmth behind her as a tangible thing though they weren't sharing any physical contact. "I don't think I can do this, Phira. I don't think I can go on without you."

"You won't be, Es. Think of me as *your* Guardian Angel. You won't see me; you won't always feel my presence. But I will be right beside you until the job's done. And when you really, really need me, I'll be right here," she reiterated, needing for Esmeralda to understand and accept what she was saying.

"Saphira, I've never not needed you. I tried not to need you when you were simply banished, and it nearly killed me not to have you there. How is you actually being dead going to make this easier to bear? It just means there's no way for you to come home to me... ever again."

Saphira swore she could hear her heart breaking. She hadn't realized what a crisis of faith this was going to be for Esmeralda. She took a deep breath and slowly reached forward, allowing Esmeralda the opportunity to pull away. Saphira was gratified when Esmeralda purely melted into her.

They stood together like that for a while, absorbing the love and comfort they gave to each other. "Es, I want you to listen to me, all right?" waiting for the head tucked under her chin to nod. "Good, now - I don't know what His plan is exactly," smiling when she felt Esmeralda snort against her chest. "I know, but it had to be said because in my line of work I usually have some idea of what's going on and how things are supposed to play out, right? Right," Saphira answered herself immediately. "But, I do know that I get to keep an eye on things... and on you. I really am going to be your Guardian Angel until this mission is over with. But Es... you can't quit, okay? You can't just give up."

"Saphira...."

"Es, you're not alone. You still have Ruby and all the girls helping you out on the earthly plane and I'll be on call. You should know that this case has drawn quite a bit of attention elsewhere as well."

Esmeralda pulled back far enough that she could look Saphira in the eye. "How do you know that?"

Saphira shrugged. "I've talked to a few people."

Esmeralda growled. "I wish I knew what this whole thing was really all about. There has to be more to what's going on than what I've been told. Because I've never been handed a case like this in all my years as a clean-up angel."

Saphira tilted her head. "What makes this one different?"

"Everything!" came the gruff exclamation. "Nothing has been done like it should have. And you dying...." Esmeralda's voice trailed off. "How did that happen, Phira? You were an Angel of Vengeance - how did you die?? Why did you leave me??" her voice growing louder and more frustrated.

Saphira's lips covered Esmeralda's for a long time and Esmeralda clung to the strong body that held her. When Saphira felt Esmeralda relax against her, she gently eased the intensity of the kiss until they slowly separated without losing contact with one another.

"Es…."

"I'm sorry, love. I know you didn't choose this. I just... I don't understand it; I don't think I understand anything anymore."

"Maybe it's not about understanding, Sweetheart - maybe it's all about faith."

Esmeralda stood so still then that Saphira scrambled for the words to say to make Esmeralda breathe again. Before she could come up with anything suitable, however, Esmeralda sucked air in on a gasp and shook her head. "Do you really think it's that simple?"

Saphira shrugged. "I think it can be... if we let it."

"And we'll be together again when this is all over?"

"Once He determines things with Charisma and Brianna have reached their conclusion... whatever that may be at this point... yes. We will be together again."

Esmeralda sighed. "I'm not going to remember any of this when I return to the earthly plane, am I?"

"Not here, I'm afraid," touching Esmeralda's forehead with her own. "But here?" covering the strong heartbeat with her hand. "I think you'll have a measure of peace in your heart even if you don't know exactly why."

"I don't suppose you have any idea how much longer this is going to take do you?" frowning when Saphira shook her head. "Or what the outcome will be?" This time Saphira chuckled, and Esmeralda growled, even though Saphira could see a slight twinkle in her eye. "It's not funny."

"No, it isn't," Saphira agreed. "Not even He knows what the outcome will be at this point. Apparently, He didn't think that whole 'free will' thing through all the way before He gave it to humanity."

"Do you know how long we have here together before you have to go?"

"Until you understand. He'll let me know when it's time."

Before Saphira knew what was happening or could formulate a protest, she found Esmeralda in her arms taking them to the ground. Bemused blue met ferocious green as Esmeralda leaned down into Saphira's body.

"I understand enough. I understand that you're here and I'm here and everything else will wait for just a little while." Then she captured Saphira's lips and there was no more talking.

************

Charisma and Kay stood just inside the door listening to Esmeralda's slow, shallow breathing. They exchanged glances and Kay cocked an eyebrow. Charisma shrugged.

"Her breathing is a lot more shallow and a lot slower than it was when Brianna and I were in here a little while ago. If I didn't know better, I'd say she was dying. But I'm not a medical expert - what do you think, Doc?"

"I'd guess you were right. I told Okasa something like this was likely, but I didn't expect it to happen so soon. It thought she'd at least make it through the funeral... maybe even for some time after that. But this...."

"Wait - what do you mean you told Okasa? What exactly did you say to my mother?"

"Do you remember Esmeralda telling us about her and Saphira being mates?" waiting for Charisma to nod impatiently. "Right - well, as far as Esmeralda is concerned she hasn't simply lost a spouse; her soul is broken. A large part of what kept her going every day is no longer there. So she has very little reason to live; if the will is not there, it will only be a matter of time before the body realizes that the soul is gone and follows it."

"You're saying she'll choose to die? She'll will it?"

"I'm saying I have never seen a bond like that before. I'm not sure she can survive it broken."

"Is there anything we can do?"

Kay shrugged. "I don't know. Try talking to her. We know the unconscious can hear the world around them. Maybe knowing people love and care about her will give her a reason to endure for a while."

Charisma nodded but bit her lip. "I wonder if that is fair to her," smiling sadly when she saw the confusion cross Kay's face. "Is it fair to ask her to survive and exist, knowing that she won't really be living?"

"I don't know, but either way it'll be good for her to know that she has friends and family around who love and care about her enough to let her decide what she needs to do."

"All right," Charisma agreed. "I'll do what I can. If Mama comes back, will you send her in?"

"Absolutely," Kay agreed, then stepped from the room, giving Charisma a bit of privacy to speak to Esmeralda alone.



Chapter XCIV

"... days, Es. It took days before his skin wasn't tinted black and blue. The only saving grace was that he wasn't enrolled in daycare or school at that point as I probably would have had a hard time convincing anyone I wasn't some sort of ritualistic cultist or something. I think the only reason Ame didn't question things was because she saw the state of the study after it happened." Charisma bit her lip in thought. "I think I still have pictures."

Charisma gently pushed the hair off of Esmeralda's face, then she caressed Esmeralda's cheek before surreptitiously checking her neck for a pulse. Esmeralda's breathing had become so slow and shallow that Charisma was reassured by the steady heartbeat under her fingertips. Still, there was no other palpable response to her words or her touch and Charisma sighed and resumed speaking.

"Of course, the fact that the child *smelled* like ink... let me just say that I'll take the smell of his first birthday party over that smell any day. I haven't told you that one, have I?" waiting for a reaction that wasn't happening. She sighed again. "You never got to meet my Grammy - she died just after Adam's first birthday. But she was the one to introduce each of her great-grandchildren to the wonders of chocolate icing." Charisma chuckled. "I have video of that - I'll have to show you."

The sound of her voice was soft, and even though Kay couldn't understand the words being spoken, she appreciated the soothing cadence Charisma had adopted. She motioned Okasa inside, then jerked her head towards the kitchen. "I'll be just outside the door if either of you needs me for anything."

Okasa placed a hand on her arm and Kay hesitated, leaning down so she could hear her words without disturbing the one-sided conversation Charisma was carrying on with Esmeralda.

"Did Brianna return?" feeling the slight shake Kay gave. "Have you spoken to her?"

"Not since I let her know you were headed her way," Kay said with a hint of apology. Okasa's smile offered clemency and Kay released a breath in relief. She didn't want to lose the Taghertys from her life, but Brianna would always come first if she was forced to choose.

"I'm glad you did, Kay - she deserved the warning, and knowing that she chose to wait for me.... I can't tell you the hope that gives me that all this may still work out."

"Okasa...."

"I know I shouldn't get my hopes up, but is it wrong for me to want my family to be whole again... to be happy?"

"Wrong?" Kay asked, shaking her head. "No. Likely?" She sighed again. "Probably not. However," she continued before Okasa could protest, "your daughter is waiting for you."

Okasa looked at the tableau taking place on the bed, then turned back to Kay. "Do you think this is helping?"

"I think it can't hurt. Esmeralda needs to know that there are people around her that love and care about her. It may make things easier for her until...."

"You still think this is going to kill her?"

"I have no reason to think otherwise at the moment, but I'd dearly love to be proven wrong."

"All right," Okasa replied. "Let me see if I can do anything to help keep her with us." Okasa patted the arm under her hand, then made her way to sit opposite Charisma on the bed. Kay watched them for another long moment before turning and making her way back to the kitchen.

************

"BR'ANNA!!" The yell across the Mall made a number of heads turn, but only one was important as far as Adam Rockwell was concerned. He pulled loose from both his father and his Papa and hurtled in Brianna's direction. Fortunately, Kent had seen Brianna exit the Gallery at almost the exact time his son did, so Adam only ran two steps before Kent had scooped him up in his arms. "PA!!" Adam screeched in frustration. He pointed at Brianna. "GO!!"

Kent looked around, noting that the few who were paying attention were chuckling at Adam's enthusiasm and insistence. He turned towards Brianna who had stuffed her hands into her pockets, but stood waiting patiently for him to decide how he wanted to handle this encounter. Patrick as well, simply stood back and waited for things to unfold. Kent turned his attention to Adam.

"Son, you can't just run off like that."

"But Br'anna...."

"Brianna hasn't moved, Adam. But that's not the point. You CANNOT keep running off like that - I don't care who you see. You could get hurt very badly, and that would make us all... Mama, me, even Brianna... very sad. We don't want anything bad to happen to you, all right?" He paused when Adam's lower lip quivered. "You're not in trouble for wanting to see Brianna, but you can't keep running away from Mama and me like that anymore either. Do you understand?"

Adam tucked his head beneath Kent's chin and nodded solemnly. "Okay. Should we go see Brianna now? I think she's waiting for us."

Adam's head popped back up so quickly he nearly clocked his father in the chin. As it was, only Kent's swift reflexes kept him from a sore jaw or worse. But it was hard to fault Adam's smile or his eagerness when he nodded his agreement rapidly. Kent laughed and headed them towards where Brianna Walker still stood watching them. Patrick followed along docilely behind them.

"BR'ANNA!!" Adam squealed once more as they approached, leaning out of his father's embrace as he reached for Brianna. Automatically she opened her arms and accepted Adam, letting him wrap around her in a firm body hug. It only lasted a moment before he pushed back enough to put his hands on her cheeks and rub her nose with his. Then he giggled. "Love Br'anna. Br'anna good."

"I love you too, Little Man. Are you out seeing the dinosaurs today?"

"Actually, we've only made it as far as the Mall," Kent replied with a smile, causing Brianna's attention to turn to him. "Hello, Brianna."

"Kent... Paddy," nodding at each of them slightly.

"So what brings you out here?" Patrick asked bluntly. "Aren't you supposed to be working?"

"Not today, Papa - not after what happened last night."

"So why aren't you there instead of here?" not unkindly.

"I was. It just got a little crowded and I needed some air."

Kent frowned. "How is she? Esmeralda, I mean."

"About like you'd expect, I imagine," Brianna said quietly. "I've never seen anyone as devastated by something like this. It's hard to explain. I've seen people suffering with the loss of a loved one. I remember when my grandmother died... my papa was completely distraught by her death. But it didn't destroy him - he managed to live for a number of years after she was gone, and if he wasn't as fulfilled as he had been when she was still with him, he was able to find a measure of peace and happiness in his life again."

"You don't think Es will be able to do that?"

Brianna shook her head slowly. "No. It's hard to explain unless you know them... unless you see it for yourself. But something happened to her last night. It was more than heartbreak - it was as if something in her simply died with Saphira and I don't know if she can live without it."

Adam squirmed and Brianna turned her attention back to him even as Kent spoke.

"Do you think it's still crowded at Esmeralda's?" he asked cautiously.

Brianna furrowed her brow at his words even as she kissed Adam's fingers when they tickled her lips. She felt certain Charisma was still there, which made it more than crowded in her mind. This wasn't about her, however, and she wasn't going to allow herself to be selfish any longer. Esmeralda had been a friend to her from the moment they'd met, and she'd do her best to stand beside Esmeralda for as long as she'd allow it.

"I think I've had enough air if you boys would like to come back to Esmeralda's and sit Shiva with us."

Kent and Patrick exchanged glances, then turned to Brianna. "We'd like that very much." Together they walked to the Metro and headed for Esmeralda's.

************

Kay made her way upstairs, idly noting the number of closed doors before she reached the one Okasa had assured her was Ruby's room. She knocked lightly, not surprised to hear a tired voice beckon her inside. Kay crossed the room and took the proffered seat on the bed.

"Have you gotten any sleep?"

Ruby shook her head. "I can't. Every time I close my eyes I see Es lying on that pallet next to Saphira. It just breaks my heart."

Kay bit her lip before she spoke. "Listen, I don't normally do this, but would you like a prescription for something? I'm only offering because you seem to be Esmeralda's main support right now, and it's not going to do anyone any good if you run yourself into the ground with exhaustion."

Ruby patted Kay's hands and shook her head. "You're sweet, really, and if it continues, we may revisit this. But right now I just can't."

Kay nodded. "I understand. Just know the offer's there if you need it."

"I appreciate it." Ruby closed her eyes and swallowed hard before taking a deep breath and refocusing her stare on Kay. "How's she doing?"

"Not good," Kay responded honestly. "She seems to have withdrawn inside herself, and I don't know if there's anything we can do to keep her from staying there. Charisma and Okasa are with her at the moment, but I don't know that they're making much headway. I'm sure wherever Esmeralda's head is at right now, it's probably a much more pleasant prospect than what her reality here is. I just wish there was something...." Kay stopped talking when Ruby patted her arm.

"Kay, you're doing as much as anyone could and more than most would even bother with. I mean, it's not like you really know either of them well, do you?" smiling when Kay shook her head. "Most folks wouldn't make this kind of effort for practical strangers."

"Glad I'm not most people then," Kay muttered. Ruby chuckled.

"So am I," then she tilted her head in a listening pose. "Is someone knocking on the door?"

Kay stilled and focused her attention on listening outward. After a moment, she blinked and looked at Ruby. "I don't know how you heard that, but let me go take care of it. You try to get a little more rest, okay? I'll let you know if anything changes."

Ruby held Kay's gaze for a long moment, then nodded tiredly before closing her eyes in exhaustion. In another minute she was sleeping and Kay headed downstairs to see what was going on. Somehow she wasn't at all surprised to discover Brianna had returned, but she was more than a little stupefied to see that she'd brought Patrick, Kent and Adam with her.

Still, as the de facto hostess, Kay took it upon herself to let them know what was going on. "Charisma and Okasa are with Esmeralda," she commented for Patrick and Kent's benefit. "And Ruby is still upstairs resting," she added for Brianna.

"Has there been any change?" Brianna asked as she removed her coat. She took a squirming Adam from Kent to allow him to do the same as they waited for Kay's reply.

"Not for the better, no. Esmeralda seems to have slipped into... well, if it's not a coma, it's something of an unconscious fugue state. She doesn't appear to be aware of anything around her. Charisma has been talking to her, hoping to reach her, but the last I checked, she hadn't made a lot of progress on that front."

"Mama?" Adam asked, looking around even as Brianna struggled to remove his jacket. "Br'anna, where's Mama?"

Brianna took the chair she'd spotted next to the phone table, easing Adam into a place on her lap as she slipped his arms from the jacket sleeve. "Mama is in with Es, Little Man. Something bad happened and Es is really sad right now. Mama and Gramma are trying to help her feel better... make some of the hurt go away."

"Adam help too," he declared fiercely.

"I don't know if you can, Little Man, but I'll tell you what - you promise me you'll be gentle and loving with Es and we'll go check on her, okay? You can hug her neck real tight and tell her you love her."

Adam grinned. "Love Es. Es good." He cocked his head at Brianna. "Where's Phira?"

Tears welled in Brianna's green eyes, but she didn't allow them to spill down her face. "Saphira had to go see God, Adam. It's why Es' heart hurts so much. God needs to keep Saphira with him now."

"Phira's an angel?" he asked, brows furrowed as he tried to understand the complexities of death. Brianna just nodded.

"Yeah, Son - Saphira's an angel now."

"Good," he declared emphatically. "Phira 'tect Es."

Brianna seemed as startled as the rest of the adults in the room at his insistence, but she didn't have the heart to crush that idealism. Instead, she gave Adam a weak smile. "Yeah... Saphira can protect Es now. She'll be watching over her and all of us like a Guardian Angel."

"Good," Adam stated once more. "Love Phira."

"Well, let's go see if we can help Es feel better, okay?" She turned to Kent. "We shouldn't be too long if you want to wait in the living room. Kay can show you. I just don't think there's room for all of us in the bedroom."

"It's fine," Kent assured her. "Go on," dipping his head towards Adam who was showing signs of restlessness. Brianna just nodded and walked away. Kay waited until she and Adam entered the bedroom, then gestured towards the living room. Kent and Patrick took the silent hint and together they turned towards the living room to wait together.

************

"Br'anna?" Adam whispered harshly, causing Charisma and Okasa to look towards the door simultaneously. "Why's it dark in here? Where's Es?"

Okasa's hand on Charisma's kept them both in place while they waited for her answer as Brianna shut the door silently behind her.

"You remember I told you how Es' heart hurt because she missed Saphira so much?" feeling him nod against her. "Well, the dark makes Es feel closer to Saphira right now. But we're going to try and help her back to us, okay?" Adam nodded again.

During her explanation both Okasa and Charisma had silently risen from the bed, each stepping back until they were shrouded in shadows. Okasa motioned to Charisma that she was going to go check on Ruby, and that Charisma should remain. Charisma nodded absently - she had no desire to leave. Aside from her concern for Esmeralda, she was curious to see what Brianna had in mind for Adam.

"Br'anna?" putting his face right next to hers when Brianna turned in his direction. "Hug Es?" Brianna bit her lip, then sat down slowly next to Esmeralda's still body. She kept a firm arm around Adam even when he squirmed and after a moment, he understood her unspoken directive and settled on her lap. He studied her pensive expression carefully. "Br'anna?"

"Adam, you can hug Es, but remember what I told you, okay? Be very gentle because Es hurts a lot right now."

"'Kay," he agreed solemnly. Brianna set him next to Esmeralda, keeping a light hand on Adam's leg. For his part, Adam didn't notice - he was too intent on being cautious as he snuggled into Esmeralda's body. He put his head on Esmeralda's shoulder and wrapped a thin arm over her waist. "Love Es," he murmured, not even noticing Esmeralda's visceral reaction as she tenderly returned his embrace. But Brianna saw... as did Charisma. Both heaved a small sigh of relief, but kept their attention on the scene playing out in front of them. They had no way of knowing the difference Adam was making for Esmeralda.

************

On another plane, Esmeralda was curled up naked into Saphira's equally naked body... both of them only covered by one of Saphira's massive wings, content to simply breathe in one another's essence. Finally, though, Saphira sighed. "I need to go, Love, and so do you."

"I don't want...."

"I don't either, Es, but we don't have a choice in this now. We have to...."

"I don't *have* to do anything, Saphira. I have absolutely no compunction about staying here until we are together again for real," anger in her tone.

"No, Es... if you stay here, I won't be allowed to come back. And we don't have any assurance that we'll be together if you choose this. Wait," Saphira added, holding up a hand before Esmeralda could make a retort. "Sweetheart, I love you with all that I am and everything I have. And given the choice, I'd have never picked this for us. But it's only for a little while... and then we'll be together again, I promise. And nothing will separate us again."

"You can't know that, Phira."

"Es, if you can't trust in us, what's left? Hmm?" Saphira waited, knowing that Esmeralda wasn't fighting because she didn't believe in them; instead, she was resisting the separation she knew was necessary between them. "Besides, you've got people worried about you out there. Don't you think you need to reassure them? The adults probably understand a little of how you feel, but I doubt Adam does. And he's waiting for you."

Esmeralda glared. "You fight dirty."

Saphira chuckled. "You've known that for an eternity. Are you just now figuring out what that means?" Esmeralda slapped at her, only to have Saphira catch her hand and bring it to her lips. "Es, it's not forever."

"Do you swear?"

"Angel's honor," Saphira offered. "And until then, I'll be right beside you... even when you can't feel me there. I'll be watching over you."

"I love you, Phira."

"I love you too, Es... always."



Chapter XCV

The change was so slow it wasn't even noticeable at first. But Charisma and Brianna were both looking for it, so when Esmeralda's breathing started to deepen, they noticed. For several minutes, they kept wary eyes on her, only relaxing when her breathing settled into the steady cadence of sleep. They watched for a few more minutes, then when they were satisfied that both Esmeralda and Adam were sleeping comfortably, they moved to stand next to the bedroom door together.

"Did you know...?" Charisma whispered, her breath teasing the shell of Brianna's ear when she spoke. "Did you know Adam would make a difference for her?"

Brianna pulled back slightly before she could shiver in reaction to Charisma's proximity, then shook her head. "No. How could I have known something like that? That was pure, dumb luck or the grace of God or Fate intervening... take your pick."

"Then where...?" motioning towards Adam.

Brianna sighed. "I ran into him and Kent and Paddy while I was out. They wanted to come back here and Adam wanted to make Es feel better."

"I'd feel a lot better if the two of you just kissed and made up already," Esmeralda mumbled from the bed, not awake enough to realize she could be clearly heard in the otherwise complete stillness of the room. Her words had an effect, however - causing Brianna and Charisma to flush and back away from one another as they jerked their attention to the bed. "Right now," Esmeralda continued in a slightly louder voice in an attempt to ensure they heard her without disturbing Adam, "I'd settle for a little peace and quiet before you wake up Saphira's little buddy."

Charisma and Brianna studiously avoided looking at each other as they moved back to their places on opposite sides of the bed. Brianna took a tentative seat on her side, combing back Adam's unruly hair before covering the hand Esmeralda was cradling him with.

"He's fine, Es... sleeping soundly. How are you... seriously? You had us all worried."

"I'm not good, Brianna, but I can almost feel Saphira watching over me now. It... it comforts me in a strange way, as much as it hurts to know she's gone from me."

"Adam said she would," Brianna offered, getting looks from both Esmeralda and Charisma. She shook her head. "I don't know where it came from, really. Sunday School, maybe?" She shrugged. "I told him that God needed Saphira and he asked me if she was an angel now. When I told him she was, he said she'd protect you." Brianna bit her lip. "It was all a little bizarre...."

"Out of the mouths of babes," Charisma said softly. She looked at both Esmeralda and Brianna before turning the focus of her awareness to her son. She moved closer to the bed, only taking a seat when Esmeralda patted the narrow patch of bed that was still unclaimed. Charisma seated herself gingerly, glancing at both Brianna and Esmeralda again before running her fingers through Adam's thick hair. "Sometimes I think they're aware of things we've forgotten about - can see things we can't because we gave up believing in them."

"Well either way, I hope Saphira is looking out for you Es," Brianna said. "I know it doesn't make much difference in how you feel about her being gone, but it gives me a measure of peace to know she's watching over you. And who knows... maybe she'll be keeping an eye on the rest of us as well. I'd kinda like that... knowing she had my back."

Esmeralda didn't comment, but her watery smile spoke volumes. Brianna just squeezed the hand she held, gratified when Esmeralda returned it... however lightly.

Charisma placed her hand over Esmeralda's other hand - the one that had covered Adam's hand on her stomach - and waited for Esmeralda's eyes to track to her. Impulsively she leaned forward and brushed a kiss over Esmeralda's forehead, then pulled back enough to see into green eyes.

"Es, Mama and I would be honored to host a wake for Saphira after the service if you think you'd be up for something like that. It would give people a chance to let you know how much Saphira meant to them, and how much you still do." She paused when there was no reaction, then plowed on, determined to finish her offer to Esmeralda. "You don't have to, of course, but we'd really like to."

Esmeralda's brow furrowed. "Why?"

The question caused Charisma's brows to shoot into her hairline as she scrambled for a good answer to share with Esmeralda. Finally, she settled for simply telling the truth. "Saphira touched a lot of lives, Es - and so have you. There's nothing we can do to make this better... nothing we can do to make it go away. But at least this might give you some peace when you see just how many people really do care... about you and Saphira. And it might offer some closure as well."

"I don't want closure, Charisma. I want Saphira back with me."

"Oh Es... if I could give that to you, I would in a heartbeat." Charisma turned to meet Brianna's eyes, grateful for her immediate agreement. "Any of us would if it was in our power to do so. But Es...."

"I know," Esmeralda whispered. "Thank you both," squeezing the hands covering hers, "but please... I just need to be alone right now."

"I don't think that's true," Brianna countered, "but I think you want to be, and I don't blame you for that. Is there anything else we can do for you?" rising from the bed without releasing her hold on Esmeralda's hand.

"Should we take Adam?" Charisma cut in.

"Adam is fine for now," Esmeralda uttered faintly. Charisma nodded and stood.

"All right, Es. We'll go, but we'll be just outside the room if you need us for anything. Just remember you've got a lot of people who love you, okay?"

Esmeralda nodded and closed her eyes. Charisma and Brianna stared for a moment longer, then by mutual, unspoken consent, they walked silently to the door. Only when it was closed behind them, did either of them release a sigh. Then they turned to each other as a feeling of awkwardness fell over them for the things Esmeralda had said, and all the things between them still left unsaid.

Fortunately, they were saved from having to break the strained silence when Patrick crept into the room. He stutter-stopped, not actually expecting to see them leaning on either side of the bedroom door looking so drained. He didn't draw attention to it, however; instead, he continued towards the coffeepot that had been his original destination.

It didn't take much effort to locate the things he needed and soon Patrick had a pot of coffee brewing. Only then did he turn his attention back to the two women still leaning against the doorjamb.

"Everything all right girls?" crossing his arms over his chest and his feet at the ankles as he leaned against the counter. "How's Es?"

"She woke up for a little while, Daddy."

"But...?" waiting for a long moment for a response before he proceeded to speak again. "C'mon, lasses," his brogue coming to the fore as it always did in times of stress. "You'd not be looking quite so exhausted if somethin' troublesome hadn't happened in that room." He glanced around. "Where's Adam?"

"Adam's fine, Papa," Brianna replied. "He's taking a nap with Es. It seemed to bring her comfort and since he wanted to help her feel better...." She shrugged.

"So something happened betwixt the two of ya then?" seeing color rise in one face and drain from the other.

"Daddy!" Charisma choked out. Before he could comment further, the coffee finished making and Patrick turned his back to them to prepare a cup for himself and one for Okasa as well.

"I'm not gonna ask," he said quietly as he picked up both cups. "But maybe the two of you should figure this out before ya lose yer chance to do so." He didn't give them the chance to reply; he simply walked to the door and back towards the living room.

Almost the moment he disappeared from view, Kay stepped into the room, as though she'd been waiting just outside the door. With an effort at nonchalance, she grabbed two more coffee cups and poured them full, then looked at Brianna and Charisma.

"If you two would like to join us in the living room, we'd like an update on Esmeralda if you have one." Without giving them time to comment, she followed Patrick's footsteps back to the living room.

Charisma and Brianna spared one another a quick glance, then moved towards the coffee pot. Charisma grabbed the cups as Brianna picked up the pot, falling into a rhythm they had found with one another in a time long past. Charisma added sugar and Brianna poured the cream and in moments their coffee was ready. Only when that chore was done did they look at each other again.

"So do you want to talk to them or shall I?" Brianna asked, lifting her cup towards the people gathered in the living room. "Most of them belong to you."

Charisma snorted. "All but one belongs to me, and all but one belongs to you. I'd say it was pretty well even." She met Brianna's disbelieving stare. "Oh come on, Brianna - Mama and Daddy belong to you as much as they belong to me. However, I'll go talk to them. You'll let us know if anything changes?"

"Of course," Brianna replied as she pulled a chair out from the table. Charisma nodded and walked out of the kitchen. Brianna placed her coffee in front of her and folded her hands so she could prop her chin on top. Then she focused her gaze on the tabletop and waited.

************

"Es?" Adam said sleepily, yawning and stretching against her. He sat up carefully, strangely mindful of where he put his hands. Brianna had told him Es hurt, and Adam didn't want to be the one that brought more pain to her... however accidentally. He leaned over until his face was over hers, then he raised one hand and patted her cheek gently. "Es? You 'wake?"

Esmeralda blinked open heavy eyes, wondering why she still felt so exhausted. Then she met Adam's bright blue eyes and smiled even as tears flooded her eyes again. "Hi Adam," she breathed out quietly, afraid anything louder would cause the sobs to start. And as much as she may have needed that release, she refused to traumatize Adam with the depth of her grief.

Adam smiled then grew grave, reaching up to tenderly wipe the tear the spilled from Esmeralda's eye without her conscious permission. "Es hurt?" Esmeralda nodded, the motion causing even more wetness to slide down her cheeks. Adam sat up further and jerked a thumb at his chest with a determined air. "Adam kiss... make better."

"Oh Sweetie," Esmeralda replied softly. "I wish you could." She put a hand over her heart. "I hurt on the inside, Adam. I hurt in the place where Saphira was."

Adam put his hand on top of hers, closing his eyes and furrowing his brow in consternation. It would have been amusing if Esmeralda hadn't already been trying to hold herself together by sheer grit. As it was, she couldn't even appreciate how adorable he looked for fear of losing the last tether she had keeping her from simply losing control. She closed her eyes and focused on modulating her breathing. When she opened her eyes again, Adam was staring at her with a peculiar look on his face.

"Es?" he said calmly. "Phira's still there," patting the hand still resting on her heart. She blinked at him stupidly.

"Adam, how do you know that?"

"Phira told me," he responded matter-of-factly. Esmeralda sucked in a breath as though she'd been sucker punched.

"She told you?" asked in a hoarse whisper that was all that she could manage.

"YES!" he affirmed bluntly with a smile on his face, then pointed to the corner of the room closest to the head of the bed on Saphira's side. "Ask her!"

Esmeralda blinked dumbly, then turned her head. But to her dismay, there was nothing for her to see - no one in the corner Adam was indicating. Surely if Saphira was nearby, Esmeralda would be able to see her, wouldn't she? But she knew better than most that sometimes the heart and mind hide what they are unwilling or unable to acknowledge. And she also recognized that children are able to see and appreciate many things that most adults no longer accept as possible.

It occurred to her briefly that this was like a test of faith for her, and she realized if that was truly the case, she was failing miserably. Esmeralda closed her eyes again and decided to accept that as a possibility and act accordingly. She took a deep breath to center herself, feeling a peace settle over her she hadn't felt in a very long time. Now she didn't *almost* feel Saphira's presence - she truly felt Saphira beside her and within. The feeling made her eyes well with tears and this time she made no effort to stop them or the sobs that accompanied them.

Adam had been watching Esmeralda carefully, and when the tears started flowing and her shoulders started shaking, he looked to the corner for a long moment before sliding from the bed to the floor. He ran to the door and opened it with effort, then nearly ran smack into Brianna. He didn't hesitate, but took her by the hand and pulled her back into the room.

Brianna, who had heard Adam's thump when his feet hit the floor, had risen from her chair and moved towards the bedroom door. She reached it just as Adam jerked it wide, and she willingly let herself be tugged into the room at his urgent behest.

"Br'anna fix - help Es," he commanded pointing a finger towards the figure crying on the bed. Brianna felt her own eyes welling up, but she nodded and walked to Esmeralda's side, taking a seat on the bed and rubbing the other woman's back in the only gesture of comfort she could offer.

She noticed Adam move to a corner of the room and wondered what held his attention. Then without any visible cue, he came back around to stand beside her, and Brianna smiled down at him gently.

"Es okay now?" he asked with a voice full of concern.

Brianna cupped his face in her free hand. "I think she will be, Sweetie. Can you go ask Mama to come in here for a minute? I promised her...." But before Brianna could finish her explanation, Adam had taken off in a little boy run to find Charisma. Surprisingly, though, he didn't yell - he just ran.

In another moment, Charisma was being led back into Esmeralda's room by her son's hand, and they were being followed by Okasa, Patrick and Kent at a much more sedate pace. Brianna chanced to wonder where Kay was, but before she could ask, Charisma volunteered the information.

"She had to take a call."

Brianna nodded her acceptance of Charisma's explanation and turned back to Esmeralda who was still crying. Charisma picked Adam up with a groan and walked back to where the rest waited in the doorway.

"Son, I want you to go with Daddy and Gramma and Papa for now, okay? I promise, Brianna and I will take care of Es, but ...."

"S'okay, Mama," Adam said, patting her face. "Love Es."

Charisma smiled and tilted Adam towards Kent, who immediately shifted to lift Adam into his arms. Adam went willingly, and Charisma and Kent exchanged small smiles before Kent turned and walked back towards the living room. Patrick followed him without a word. Okasa hesitated a moment.

"Is there anything...?"

"I don't think so, Mama. If there is...."

"... you know where to find us." Okasa patted Charisma's arm. "Good luck," she added before she too walked back to the living room to wait.

Charisma closed the door and turned back towards the bed, but she didn't approach it. From where she stood, she could see that Esmeralda was no longer wracked by sobs and though there still appeared to be tears sliding down her cheeks, she was talking to Brianna in quiet tones. Charisma leaned against the door and crossed her arms over her chest, content to wait.

************

Brianna had kept up the soothing motion on Esmeralda's back, not sure what else to do. She'd spared a glance at Charisma and the rest when they'd stopped in the doorway, tacitly recognizing Charisma's explanation of Kay's absence before turning back to Esmeralda. She felt more than saw Charisma removing Adam from the immediate area, focusing her attention on Esmeralda. Though she felt the shudders subsiding, Brianna continued to rub Esmeralda's back slowly, hoping to contribute a sense of calm to Esmeralda, if not actual peace.

When Esmeralda was able to get her hiccups under control, she rolled over just enough to meet Brianna's eyes. "Thank you," she offered quietly. "I...."

Brianna shook her head. "No need for thanks, Es. I can't begin to imagine what you're going through right now."

"You don't have to, Brianna. You've already been there... in a manner of speaking."

Brianna shook her head. "Not even close, Es. It doesn't even compare. At least I could have confronted Charisma. It wasn't like she was gone from me completely."

"But she was, Brianna. Oh, maybe not in a permanent way like death." Tears rolled down her face but Esmeralda didn't break down again. "But she was still completely out of your realm."

"Maybe... but it was my own choice, Es - she wasn't taken from me."

Esmeralda smiled sadly and shook her head. Brianna didn't want to believe what Esmeralda knew to be true and there was no way to convince her at the moment. "Well, thank you anyway, Brianna. You and Charisma have been godsends to me... but especially now."

"I for one am glad I could be, Es," Brianna said, clutching one of Esmeralda's hands in her free one and simply holding it. She turned and caught Charisma watching them from the door and motioned her over with a wrench of her head. Charisma pushed off the door and circled to the other side of the bed, taking a seat and covering the hand Brianna still held with one of her own. Brianna didn't move, but it took everything in her not to flinch or jerk away from the unexpected touch. Charisma squeezed lightly, and kept her eyes locked on Esmeralda's face.

"Thank you," Esmeralda repeated quietly. "I told Brianna - you both have been godsends in my life, but especially now. I don't know how I'll ever repay...."

Charisma shook her head. "Don't let Mama hear you say that. There's no repayment needed when it comes to family... old or new."

"Then as family, I'm gonna say something, and I want you both to let me have my say without interruption. Then I want the two of you to go and take the rest of the family and go home for today. I promise you'll all be welcome to come over again tomorrow, but I need to be alone for the rest of the day... please."

Brianna and Charisma exchanged looks, then turned to Esmeralda and nodded simultaneously. "Would you like us to ask Ruby to come with us as well?"

"Is she sleeping?"

"She was."

"Then no. As long as she's resting, she's fine here. But I may ask her to call you if she starts stirring around."

"She'll be more than welcomed, Es," Charisma said, and Esmeralda nodded her acceptance. Then she took a deep breath and spoke softly.

"Brianna, I know you're angry - you're angry about the situation you and Charisma are in; you're angry at Charisma for allowing it, but you're mostly angry at yourself." She held up a hand and shook her head before Brianna could interject. "Charisma, you're scared - you're scared of what people will think... of what this will do to your career.... But mostly you're scared you can't be what Brianna needs you to be." She paused for breath. "I want you both to think about something - I want you to understand one thing regardless of what you do with your anger and your fear." Esmeralda tilted her head up to look at the ceiling, blinking rapidly to keep the tears from spilling down her face once more. She took another deep breath and shook her head. "As badly as I hurt right now... as much as I miss Saphira, the only regret I have is the time we spent apart. Not that it was my choice or hers to be separated, but the time we missed together is my one regret in sharing my life with her. I didn't have all of her that should have been mine. Don't let anger and fear rob you of what you should have - it will only leave regret in its wake."

Esmeralda closed her eyes when she finished speaking. Brianna gently withdrew her hand from beneath Charisma's and stood, and Charisma slowly followed her from the room. Esmeralda sighed. She'd done what she could and far more than she should, and she imagined there'd be hell to pay for it eventually. But she couldn't make herself care about the possible consequences, and at least she'd given them their best chance... finally. It would be up to them to take it... or not.



Chapter XCVI

"Ruby? What are we doing here?" Opal asked for the rest, looking around at the waiting room they'd been placed in as soon as they'd arrived home. The call had been unexpected and without warning had jerked all of them out of their attempts to make themselves scarce from the house they shared with Esmeralda and Saphira. They knew they couldn't stay while Brianna and Charisma et al were there trying to offer Esmeralda support as she grieved her loss of Saphira. Ruby shook her head and scrubbed a hand over her tired face before running it through her hair.

"I don't know, Opal. I was sound asleep when I got yanked, so you know as much as I do at the moment." She glanced around at the other Angels currently quarantined with her, noting they were still dressed in their earthly garments and not their heavenly robes. "If I was to guess, though, I'd say it has something to do with our assignment. Was anyone with either Charisma or Brianna while they were at the house?"

Indi was the first to speak. "No - we didn't expect to be needed there... not with you and Amber there, Ruby. Especially since they were there to be with Es."

Brows furrowed, then Turq uncrossed her arms and pushed off the wall she'd been leaning against. "You don't suppose this is about her instead, do you? I mean, we've all seen how this is affecting her; maybe we're gonna get some directives on how to help her cope with all this or something."

Amber shook her head. "The only thing that's gonna help Es cope with this is for Saphira to not be dead anymore, and I'm pretty sure there's nothing we can do to change that particular situation."

"So then why are we here?" Mal asked. "I don't know about the rest of you, but things still aren't resolved that I can tell."

"Why don't you let me be the judge of that?" Michael asked as he strode pompously into the room.

"How about you tell us why we're here first and then we'll decide what you get to be the judge of?" Amber snapped. Michael frowned. Amber had never been so short with him before, not even before they'd become involved with one another. He couldn't fathom a reason for her to do so now. Slowly, he let his gaze wander around the room, meeting each Angels' eyes before moving on to the next, and what he found there was startling.

Every woman in the room met his eyes squarely... unflinchingly - a surprise in itself. Generally speaking, all Angels - male or female - briefly lowered their eyes out of respect for the office he held, but not this time. Yet beyond that lack of respect was a weariness... a frustration and anger that he had never witnessed singly - much less in a group so large and diverse. He silently questioned what he had not been told about what was going on.

"Amber?" he finally replied, choosing to direct his comments to her in an effort to show her that he wasn't the enemy.

"Why are we here, Michael?" she asked resignedly, losing all traces of venom in both her voice and her posture. Instead, she dropped into a chair with her head down and her hands clasped loosely between her knees - the textbook picture of defeat. Michael tilted his head and looked around the room again, seeing discouragement and disillusionment reflected back at him. He carefully eased into a seat and folded his hands on the table in front of him.

"Tell me about Esmeralda," he instructed softly, keeping his eyes on his hands. He felt Amber's head pop up, but he kept his eyes down, wanting to hear what she had to say without reacting to what he was sure was anger. Most had been unhappy about the Father's decision to cast Esmeralda and Saphira from heaven, but only Amber had actually said so to Him at the time despite Michael's admonition that she'd be wiser to hold her tongue. Her rash actions had caused them to be separated for months and Michael had missed her. This certainly wasn't how he'd pictured their reunion.

"What do you want to know?" Amber replied, her voice a whisper, but the bile in it burning into his heart. He didn't answer and Amber took that as her cue to continue. "She's dying, Michael!!" ignoring the gasp her words drew from Michael as well as the way his gaze wrenched up to meet hers. "Saphira is dead and the rending is going to kill Es as well. So you tell me exactly what it is you need to know."

"Wait... WHAT?? Saphira is.... No. What??" He looked around the room. "Saphira's dead?? Is this true?"

Amber sighed and scrubbed a hand through her hair. "Guess they don't tell you anything either, huh?" She met his eyes again. "Michael, I've never lied... to you or anyone else. That's what got me into trouble in the first place, remember? I couldn't keep my mouth shut. Why would I make something like that up? By earth time, Saphira died late last night. Her funeral is the day after tomorrow."

Michael covered his face with his hands and breathed in deeply, holding it in until he could blink away the unexpected tears. Then he released it in a shuddering stream before looking back at Amber. "That explains a lot," he muttered. "Can you fill me in... bring me up to speed on what happened? Then I'll tell you why you all were called home so unceremoniously."

"As long as it's quick, Michael," Ruby supplied. "We have to get back to Es."

Michael shook his head. "I'm not sure that's going to be possible." He held up his hands to silence their protests. "It's not up to me, and you know that."

"We'll give up our wings, Michael," Amber said with confidence. "Every last one of us," seeing every head in the room nod in agreement. Michael's jaw dropped and he looked stunned.

"Now, ladies... let's not be hasty."

"This isn't hasty, Mike," Turq replied, smirking at the riled up expression in Michael's eyes at her address of him. "This is us being sick and tired of the politics and bureaucracy that has been constantly thrown at us during this cluster of a mission. Nothing about this whole cock-up has been handled right, and this was the last straw."

"So you're staging a coup... like Lucifer did?"

"Not at all," Opal said. "We don't want to take over the place," gesturing around them vaguely. "We simply want to support a friend who needs us, and if we can't do it as Angels, we'll do it as humans."

"Okay, wait... all of you stop! Just hold on a minute!" Michael clutched his hair for a moment, the ephemeral pain giving him something else to focus on briefly. Taking a deep breath, he closed his eyes and meditated, and only when he felt a sense of calm return did he open his eyes. "All right. Amber, start from the beginning, and don't leave anything out. I can't help you if I don't know what the whole story is, can I?"

Amber blew out a frustrated breath and nodded. Maybe telling the story to Michael would help them to see something they missed.

************

Michael sat slack-jawed for several long minutes before finally closing his mouth with an audible click. He took a deep breath and released it slowly, trying to organize his thoughts into something more coherent than the chaos that was currently swirling through his brain at an alarming rate. The rest just sat back and took in his reaction, wondering what was going on. Eventually, Michael pulled himself together and cleared his throat.

"Well, that explains... so much." He looked down at his linked hands a moment before bringing his eyes up to meet each and every pair now focused solely on him. "This morning, by human standards, Esmeralda told Brianna and Charisma to do something," he paused, shaking his head. "She told them to make a choice concerning one another, and that their best choice WAS each other." He felt the other Angels' jaws swing open and he wanted to laugh. He didn't - this was serious. But he was more than a little gratified to know that he wasn't the only one who reacted so gobsmacked by the whole situation.

"So," Ruby started slowly, bringing all eyes to focus on her. "We were brought here because Esmeralda finally gave Brianna and Charisma a shove in the right direction?"

"She broke protocol," Michael responded, not thrilled with the looks of disgust that followed his accusation. He sighed. "You were brought here so we could find out if she acted on her own."

"It doesn't matter, Michael. We're standing with her on this." This from Amber.

"All of you?"

Amber let her eyes study each of her comrades in turn, saving Ruby for last. Ruby merely nodded and Amber turned back to Michael. "Yes, Michael. All of us."

He sighed again and rose from his seat, keeping his eyes on something beyond normal sight. "I can't really blame you, I suppose - not given what you've shared here. I'll make sure you are sent back to give Esmeralda the support she needs, but I don't know how long it will last."

"Make sure He understands we'll be there for as long as Es needs us, Michael. She didn't deserve what's happened and her reaction to Charisma and Brianna shouldn't have been unexpected."

"I'll do what I can," he offered without looking at them again. "Take care of her... and yourselves. I'm sure I'll see you all again soon." And without another word he walked off in the direction he'd come from, disappearing into the mist.

They waited for him to be swallowed up and remained silent for several minutes beyond that. At Amber's nod, they took seats around the table and settled in to wait.

************

"I don't like it," Kay said above the protests that were given by the rest of the family gathered in Esmeralda's living room when Charisma finished explaining Esmeralda's request to them. "She's too unstable - this is a very dangerous time for her to be left alone."

"We don't have to like it, Doc," Charisma said with barely a bite in her tone. "But we should respect her wishes."

"Even if it puts her in harm's way?" Kay ground out.

"Even then," Brianna suddenly spoke, causing all eyes to turn towards her. "Es is going to have to find her own strength... her own will to live. We can't do that for her. If she really wants to die, she'll find a way." She felt Charisma's indrawn breath, but refused to meet her eyes. Instead, Brianna stared at Kay and willed her to see what she was unable to say aloud. Finally Kay nodded.

"All right. I'm not happy about it, but Brianna's right." She turned to Charisma. "Should we try to rouse Ruby... let her know what's going on?"

"I don't think so. Es was fine with her staying in the house as long as she was sleeping. Maybe we could leave her a note to call one of us...?" looking at Brianna.

"I think that's a good idea," writing a brief note and adding both their numbers at the bottom. Then Kay snatched the missive out of her hand. Brianna glared. "Kay! What the he...?" cutting herself off abruptly when she remembered Adam was still in the room and listening.

"I know where Ruby's room is. Be right back," she added, heading up the stairs.

Meanwhile, Patrick and Okasa had gathered everyone's outerwear together and brought it into the living room, and they started sorting it out so they could leave as soon as Kay was ready.

When Kay reached Ruby's room, she hesitated, then quietly opened the door and let her eyes adjust to the dimness she was surrounded by. She guessed the older woman had finally fallen asleep, so she tiptoed across the floor and propped the note in front of the clock, sure it was the best way for it to be noticed. Then without making a sound, she retraced her steps and closed the door silently behind her. When she arrived back in the living room, it only took a moment for her to don her outerwear, and then they left Esmeralda to her grief.

************

"Oh Es," Amber said as she gently pushed the blonde hair away from Esmeralda's swollen face. "What have you gone and done, hmm?" Esmeralda didn't respond at all and Amber surreptitiously checked to assure herself that Esmeralda was still breathing. When she found a faint pulse, she released the breath she'd been holding and sighed. This was a lot harder than she'd expected it to be, and she'd expected the worst. She looked around at the other Angels who were in the room as well. Ruby gestured for her to continue talking, and Amber rolled her eyes, but resumed her one-sided conversation as a single tear escaped its confines and slid down her cheek.

"You know you put heaven into quite a tizzy - I know you knocked Michael for a loop with what you said to Brianna and Charisma. He was scandalized by it." Amber chuckled. "It was kinda funny to see, actually." She gazed around the room again, then jerked her head, waiting for the others to join her.

One by one the Angels stepped close, until they were right beside the bed, and they reached out to one another and held hands. Amber remained sitting on the bed beside Esmeralda, but she offered one hand into the circle. Ruby and Opal, one on either side of her, took it so the chain would stay unbroken. And they waited for Amber to continue.

"We're all here for you, Es, and we're not going anywhere. We told Michael we'd give up our wings before letting you go through this alone." She paused and swallowed hard - Amber had never realized how difficult it was to keep up a running discussion by yourself. She took another deep breath.

"I know you're hurt, Es. I know you're dying inside. It's killing me, and she was just my sister. And I know that us being here doesn't really help take the pain away, but we're at a loss to know what to do - for you... for us... for them. So we need you, Es. We need you to wake up and give us some sort of direction - to tell us what we can do for you." A pause. "Please, Es."

Esmeralda's eyelids fluttered and slowly her eyes blinked open. She looked at each Angel and they met her eyes unflinchingly, despite the depth of sorrow in them that made them ache for her. Finally, she let her eyes hold Amber's eyes, not closing them even when Amber gently cupped her face.

"What are you doing here, Amber?" Esmeralda asked. Amber frowned.

"Where else would we be, Es?" She tilted her head. "You really think we'd leave you alone at a time like this?"

"I expected you to have been called home," Esmeralda replied quietly. She had anticipated that ending, anyway. She had wanted nothing more than to return to sleep in the hope that she would once more find Saphira in her dreams. Less than twenty-four hours had passed since Saphira had left and all Esmeralda wanted to do was join her. And she was honest enough to know that the women currently surrounding her and offering her their unwavering strength and support would do their damnedest to make sure that didn't happen.

"We did. And we told Michael we weren't staying." Esmeralda couldn't stop her involuntary reaction - her eyes widened and her brows went into her hairline. Amber gave her a tiny smirk and nodded. "It's true. We told Michael we'd give up our wings before we stayed there."

"Why?"

Amber glared. "Because I'm selfish, Es. Because I can't watch you just give up and die... no matter how much you want to right now!" She took a deep breath and lowered her voice. "Because I promised Saphira I'd keep an eye on you."

Eyes that had been a flat gray suddenly burned with a fire that made the green flash. "You promised Saphira?? You knew...? She knew...?" Esmeralda jerked away from Amber's touch and scooted up until she was partially sitting against the headboard.

As glad as Amber was to see the spark back in Esmeralda's eyes, she was a little afraid to see that kind of anger turned in her direction. She felt Ruby and Opal squeeze the hand they held in support, and she forced herself not to flinch under the weight of the accusing stare Esmeralda was directing at her.

"No, Es - I didn't know about this." She blew out an unsteady breath. "I made my promise to Saphira a long time ago."

Now Esmeralda sucked in air, clenching her hands together until the knuckles turned white. "When?" her voice soft and broken.

Amber placed a gentle hand on Esmeralda's foot - the only place she could reach in their current positions - and didn't move even when she felt the shudder tremble through Esmeralda's frame. "When she left the first time... when she was banished."

"This isn't the same thing, Amber."

"I know, Es," Amber agreed with a nod. "This is so much worse. But that promise didn't have a time limit, and it's my privilege to look after you."

"I'm not a child, Amber! I don't need 'looking after'!" Her voice dropped to a bare whisper and Amber had to focus on Esmeralda's lips to hear her words. "I just need Saphira."

Amber tugged her hand from Ruby's and Opal's grip and they clasped their hands together when Amber slipped from them. She crawled up the bed and took Esmeralda in her arms, holding tight when she struggled against Amber's embrace. It went on for several minutes before Esmeralda collapsed into the warm body holding her and Amber just held her as she cried.

"I can't do this, Amber."

"Es, you don't have to do this alone. We're all gonna be here for you for as long as you need us. And when the time comes...." She shrugged and Esmeralda tilted her head back to look into Amber's golden eyes. Amber met Esmeralda's eyes seriously. "When the time comes, I promise to let you go," drawing a gasp from the Angels still stationed around the bed. Amber and Esmeralda didn't take any notice of the rest. "But until then, take the strength you need from us, all right? Let us help you get through this so we can go home knowing we did everything we could do."

Esmeralda studied Amber's eyes, then nodded her head. "I'll try, Amber. It's the best I can promise."

"I'll take it, Es. You've never broken a promise to me." Amber looked around the room. "Now, let us tell you about our morning, and then you can tell us what you said to Brianna and Charisma and why. After that...." She shrugged her shoulders.

Esmeralda looked around the room and frowned. "Who's watching them?"

"No one. This was more important."

For once, Esmeralda didn't argue. She simply nodded and closed her eyes as she leaned into Amber's shoulder. "So what happened this morning?"

Amber looked at Ruby, and she started telling their tale.




Chapter XCVII

Amber sat at the table, coffee cup lifted to her lips though she wasn't drinking. Instead, she was simply breathing in the scent as she let her mind wander over the events of the previous two days. The rest of the household was scattered about - some back to watching their charges; the others elsewhere in the house. So for the moment, she had the kitchen and the coffee to herself.

She let her thoughts slide by the announcement of Saphira's death and their subsequent encounter with Michael and focus on the talk with Esmeralda that came after.

Esmeralda had by turn, appeared distant, resigned, angry and depressed, but Amber felt somewhat confident that Esmeralda would at least make an effort to finish their assignment. She did have to question what Esmeralda's methods would be like, however. Given what she had done the day before, Amber figured pretty much everything was going to be fair game in an effort to get Charisma and Brianna to make whatever choice was necessary to wrap things up soon.

A hand on her shoulder startled her, and Amber hissed as hot coffee splattered her hand. She set the cup on the table forcefully, though not hard enough to allow spillage again. She turned baleful golden eyes at the intruder, then accepted the ice that Esmeralda handed her with a gracious nod.

"You all right?" Esmeralda asked with concern, though her voice was a bare whisper.

"Yeah. I was just thinking and you caught me by surprise." She cleared her throat. "How are you?"

Esmeralda shrugged. "Numb, I think. If I think about this too long, I'm gonna get angry, and that's not gonna do any of us any good at the moment." She shrugged again. "Maybe when this is all over...." She poured herself a cup of coffee despite Amber's scowl and took a seat at the table. "Let me see," she demanded, tugging lightly on Amber's injured hand.

Amber rolled her eyes, but released her hand to Esmeralda's tender care. She waited until she was done, then gave Esmeralda a droll smile. "Everything okay, doctor?"

Esmeralda cut her eyes at Amber, but couldn't stop the slight twitch of her lip. "I think you'll be all right, Amber, but you should probably be a little more aware. It's not like I was being particularly quiet." She took a deep breath. "What were you thinking about so hard anyway?"

Amber gave Esmeralda an unbelieving look, but when Esmeralda didn't look away, she shrugged. "I was thinking about all the angles."

Esmeralda cocked an eyebrow and Amber snickered at the familiar expression to keep the tears at bay. "The angles?"

"Yeah. Trying to see if there's something we've missed - because it's obvious that we're not getting all the information we should have." She looked down at her coffee, studying the steam as it rose. "None of us are, Es. Even Michael's not in the loop on everything."

"Maybe it's a test," Esmeralda offered with a vague hand motion.

"Maybe," Amber agreed after she'd finally taken a sip of her coffee. "But of what? And whom? And why?" She sighed. "I dunno, Es. Seems like a selfish thing to do." She shook her head and took another swallow from her mug before she dragged her eyes up to meet Esmeralda's. "Is there anything you'd like to do today? Or would you prefer to stay home and rest up for tomorrow?"

The sigh Esmeralda released was shaky, but her eyes were steady. "I would prefer any number of things that just aren't going to happen," she replied wearily. "But I think we will probably have visitors sooner or later." Amber's eyebrows climbed into her hairline, and Esmeralda snickered just the tiniest bit. "When I sent everyone home yesterday before you guys showed up, they said they'd be back today. I doubt they're going to wait too long to make good on that threat."

Amber's eyes widened. "Is that what you see it as... a threat?"

Esmeralda rolled her eyes. "It *was* a threat, Amber - no matter how politely worded it was." She lifted her mug to her lips and grimaced slightly as the bitter taste hit her tongue. "Who's watching?" she asked.

"Coral and Indi are still assigned to Brianna; Mal and Jade are trading off with Opal since Charisma and Kent are currently sharing household space." Esmeralda blinked and Amber nodded slowly. "Yeah. They decided it would just be easier on everyone if they were together for the next couple days. I think Jade said something about them breaking the separation news to the family after the wake."

Esmeralda shook her head. "I know I should be glad that something positive is coming out of this whole fiasco. But I can honestly say I just don't care. Don't get me wrong," she continued when Amber opened her mouth to speak. "I do hope it works out well for them. After all, we've invested a lot into this mission, and they deserve to find happiness together after all this time. On the other hand - it's cost me everything. I just want it to be over now." Esmeralda took a deep breath and blinked rapidly to keep the tears from spilling. Amber remained silent. "I'm gonna go get cleaned up."

Amber nodded. "I'll wait down here until you're done in case someone shows up while you're gone."

Esmeralda rose and put her half-full cup into the sink. She passed behind Amber, squeezing her shoulder briefly before she disappeared back into her bedroom. Amber watched her go and sighed, rubbing her eyes to rid them of the harsh stinging. She couldn't wait for this to be over.

************

Ruby wandered into the kitchen a few minutes later, stopping at the threshold when the sound of running water caught her attention. Amber looked up and waited for Ruby's eyes to find hers, then she motioned towards the coffee pot.

"I think there's enough for one more cup," she offered.

Ruby nodded her thanks and crossed to the coffeemaker, pouring out a cup and starting a new pot. She noticed the half-full cup in the sink, and turned to look at Amber.

"How is she?" straight and to the point. Amber shrugged.

"I'm not sure. I'd almost call her unfeeling at this point - except you and I both know the entire problem is she feels too much." A knock sounded on the door before Amber could elaborate and Amber motioned for Ruby to stay put. "I'll go," she offered. "Es is expecting them."

A moment later and Amber returned with Charisma trailing behind her. Ruby offered her a cup of coffee that was accepted, then they all took a seat at the table. Before the silence could grow too awkward, Charisma cleared her throat to speak.

"How is she?" looking between Amber and Ruby. Ruby gestured to Amber and Charisma focused her attention in that direction.

"She's up," glancing at the clock. "She should be out here shortly. Other than that...." Amber shrugged. It was hard to explain what Esmeralda was going through - not only had she lost her mate; she had lost the mate she'd had every expectation of sharing eternity with.

"And how are you?" Charisma asked compassionately.

"I'm fine," Amber replied brusquely. "Saphira was only my sister - she was EVERYTHING to Es."

Charisma cleared her throat again. "I can only imagine how devastated Es is because I have never seen two people as much a part of each other as they were; they had something amazing together. But I know that if something like this happened to one of my brothers, I'd still feel the loss very sharply. So please don't feel you need to downplay your own loss in this situation." She hesitated, then took a deep breath to continue. "I know we really don't know one another, but I counted your sister as a friend, and if you want to talk...."

Amber nodded rapidly. "If you'll excuse me," rising from her seat, "I'll go check on Es." She spun around and knocked on the door behind her before letting herself in. Charisma turned to Ruby who patted her hand.

"Don't worry about it, Sen... Charisma. She's trying to deal with something she never expected to. I'm sure she'll appreciate the offer once she has the chance to think about it."

"It's fine, Ruby," Charisma offered with a wave. "It's not like we actually know one another. I just... feel so helpless. I wish there was something I could do."

Ruby stared into her coffee cup and shook her head. "We'll be there for them, Charisma - it's all we can do... sad as that is to say."

"Will it be enough, Ruby?"

This time Ruby shrugged. "I don't know," she replied honestly, lifting the mug to her lips. Before she could take a sip, there was another knock on the door and Ruby set her cup on the table and rose with a quiet excuse. Charisma frowned as she glanced at her watch. Surely her time wasn't up already. Then she heard two sets of steps headed towards the kitchen and turned to find Matilda walking in behind Ruby carrying a box. Charisma immediately rose and took the box from Matilda when Esmeralda crossed the threshold into the kitchen. Matilda opened her arms and Esmeralda stepped into her embrace, though she made no effort to do more than give Matilda a polite hug. Matilda frowned and released her, but before she could comment on Esmeralda's lack of participation, Charisma had maneuvered around her to offer Esmeralda the same. After only a moment, Charisma eased back as well, her expression confused.

"Es?" wondering where the grief-stricken woman of the day before had gone. She almost preferred the outpouring of emotion - even crippling grief - to the apathy she and Matilda were facing now.

"Charisma," Esmeralda answered softly. "It's nice of you to come. You too, Matilda, though you needn't have brought anything with you. I'm sure we have plenty."

Matilda cocked her head. "Es? Honey, I had to do something, and this is what I'm good at," motioning to the food Ruby had emptied from the box. "I promised Saphira...."

Esmeralda's eyes blazed. "You promised Saphira?? What the hell does that mean??" her profanity causing eyes to widen as much as her anger. "She promised me forever!!" She gulped in air and her eyes flashed fire. "Promises are just empty words - they don't mean anything!!"

"Honey...."

"NO!!" Esmeralda closed her eyes; when she opened them, they were once more flat and gray. "No, I appreciate that you feel some sort of obligation to be here, and you're certainly welcome to stay. But we're not going to talk about Saphira... at all."

"Es...."

"I mean it, Charisma. As far as I'm concerned, we can sit quietly. After all, silence is my new companion; I suppose I should get used to it."

Matilda and Charisma exchanged glances, and without another word, they took a seat at the table, hoping to think of something Esmeralda might be willing to talk about. Unfortunately, with Saphira off limits as a topic, there wasn't much they had in common to talk about and it didn't take long for the weather to be exhausted.

As the silence lengthened and became uncomfortable, Charisma looked between Ruby and Matilda. "Matilda, Ruby - would you mind if Es and I excused ourselves for a few minutes?" Ruby and Matilda both answered in the negative, and Charisma rose, holding out her hand to Esmeralda. Esmeralda studied her for a long moment, then accepted the proffered hand, allowing Charisma to pull her to her feet. Together they walked out of the kitchen and into the living room, unaware of the drama already playing out in that room.

************

Amber had done as she'd said - she had checked on Esmeralda and let her know that Charisma had arrived and was waiting for her in the kitchen. But when she left the bedroom, she'd gone out the hall door with the intent of going up the back stairs to her room. Instead, she'd run straight into Michael, and it was only his hand over her lips that kept her from crying out. She glared and jerked her elbow out of his grasp, eyes widening and jaw dropping when she realized just who stood in front of her.

He held out his arms, wings spread wide behind him and she clasped his hand, pulled him into the living room and closed the door behind them. Whatever had brought him here, it was a good bet no one else was supposed to be aware of his angelic presence.

"Michael?? Is this the start of a coup or something?? I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to be here."

"I'm pretty sure you're right."

"Then why...? Why risk? Weren't you the one that told me...?"

"Yes," he said with a long-suffering sigh. "But this is important." He took a deep breath and met Amber's eyes. "Amber, it's Saphira's fault she died."

Amber instantly frowned. "Michael, Saphira's death was an accident caused by a child."

"The circumstances of her death may be accidental, but her death itself isn't."

"Michael, you're not making any sense."

Michael ran his hand through his hair and sighed deeply. "Can we sit? This may take a few minutes, and I feel like I'm running on empty." Amber took a good look at his face and nodded. She hadn't seen him this exhausted since Lucifer had been tossed. Michael sighed again in relief as he sat, feeling his body relax a little. Amber sat down beside him and covered his hand with her own.

"Michael, what's going on?"

"Do you remember when He cast Saphira and Esmeralda from Heaven? Do you remember His conditions to allow them to come home again?"

"Of course - Saphira had to admit that her actions were wrong and she had to sincerely mean it," Amber replied without hesitation. Michael nodded, but didn't elaborate and Amber frowned again. "Michael, what does that have to do with anything??" Michael continued to remain silent and Amber gasped. "She didn't!"

"From what I have been able to find out, Saphira went to the Father several months ago."

"Then why...?"

Michael placed a finger over her lips and Amber quieted, though she gave him a look that should have turned him to cinder. "Let me finish. Apparently Saphira went to the Father and confessed her wrongdoing with the understanding that Esmeralda be healed from whatever was plaguing her. She was dying, Amber." Amber parted her lips and Michael glared. Amber sighed and crossed her arms over her chest, motioning for him to get on with it. "In asking for forgiveness, Saphira's punishment was over. But Es still has a job to finish."

She waited, and when he didn't continue, she jumped from the couch. "Are you telling me Saphira has been called back home? That her death is a hoax??"

Michael shook his head. "I don't know where Saphira is. There's no trace of her in Heaven, Hell or on Earth. It's like she no longer exists."

"This just gets better and better," Amber mumbled. "Michael, do you understand how detrimental Saphira's death has been to Es? She's dying, Michael... AGAIN. Whatever bargain Saphira made was useless, because this is killing Es just as surely as before." She dropped her head into her hands and propped her elbows on her knees. "Even if she survives long enough to finish this assignment, she's not going to live... she's going to exist. And I wouldn't put odds on her existing much beyond the conclusion of the mission. Es is broken, Michael, and if she finds out that Saphira's actions are what caused this...." Amber let her thoughts trail off and silence reigned for several moments. "Do you think Saphira knew about this? Do you think she expected this outcome when she capitulated?"

Michael shook his head. "I can't believe she did, Amber. For as many volatile run-ins as we've had, she's never neglected to do what it took to take care of Es."

Amber nodded, knowing it for the truth. Before she could reply, she heard Charisma and Esmeralda just outside the doors. Taking Michael's hand, she closed her eyes, and with that blink, they disappeared upstairs to her room.

************

Charisma had held her tongue, wanting to speak to Esmeralda privately. Just as they reached the doors to the living room, the phone rang, and Esmeralda excused herself to answer it. In a moment she was back.

"I'm sorry, Charisma. That was the funeral home. I need to go, but if you'd like to wait here...."

"Let me take you, Es. We can wait to talk until we return if you'd be more comfortable, but I have my car here. I would feel better if you'd let me take you. Don't say no," she added when it looked as if Esmeralda was going to refuse. "I can go in with you or I can wait in the car; just let me get you there and back safely."

Esmeralda shook her head, but didn't object aloud; she merely went to the closet to don her coat. Charisma followed suit and in minutes, they were headed for the funeral home.

The ride was quiet as Charisma had promised and when they arrived, Esmeralda turned to face her. "Thank you, Charisma. If you don't mind...?"

"I'll be right here when you get out," Charisma promised, cupping Esmeralda's face and brushing a kiss over her forehead. Esmeralda nodded and slipped from the car like a ghost, and Charisma pulled her phone out to let the others know where they had gone, then she settled in to wait.

************

She gave her name to the receptionist, and the woman immediately put a call in to the director. It only took a few seconds, and he was cradling Esmeralda's small hands between his much larger ones. "I'm so sorry for your loss," he offered, and Esmeralda acknowledged the platitude with a nod. She didn't want his words - they meant nothing to her. Seeing her reaction, the director cleared his throat and continued speaking. "Saphira has been prepared for cremation; I thought you might want an opportunity to say your final goodbye."

He winced when her hands tightened painfully around his, and he strained to hear her reply. "Thank you," she replied in a whisper. He nodded and released her hands to motion towards a short hallway to one side of the chapel.

"This way, please." Esmeralda walked beside him and he stopped at a thick wooden door and opened it. "Take all the time you need, Esmeralda. Just let Ms Ross know when you're ready to leave."

"Thank you, Mr. Prescott." The man watched her a moment longer, but she wasn't looking at him and he left quietly. Esmeralda kept her eyes focused on the still face in the wooden casket, unaware of the steps that brought her to Saphira's side.

For several long moments she stared, as though memorizing Saphira's features. Finally she raised her hands to gently touch Saphira's cold skin, shivering instinctively, but refusing to remove her hands from Saphira's face. Only when the cold began to seep into her bones did Esmeralda shift her hands, brushing the dark hair from Saphira's face then tucking her hands into her coat pockets once more.

"I'm not sure what to say, Saphira. We were never supposed to be here. And I really don't think dreams and wishful thinking will bring you back to me." She sighed, her breath shuddering as she struggled to keep the tears from falling again. "I hope the Father forgave you, Phira - I hope you'll find peace in whatever afterlife fallen Angels get. I love you, Phira."

Esmeralda stared a moment longer, hoping that her words would engender a response... just like they always had between them from the moment they'd recognized their bond in their youth. When Saphira remained still and silent, Esmeralda turned on her heel and walked out without a backwards glance.



Chapter XCVIII

"Everything all right?" Charisma asked when Esmeralda climbed back in her SUV. "I mean besides...."

"About like you'd expect," Esmeralda answered wearily. "Thank you for the ride, Charisma."

"Thank you for letting me help, Es. I know it's not much, but I can't not try to do *something*," glancing over to offer Esmeralda a smile, only to find her focus was completely taken by something outside the window. "Es?"

Esmeralda didn't move her gaze, but she responded, "What did you want to talk about, Charisma?"

"Huh?" trying to catch up to Esmeralda's thought process. "Oh!" just as Esmeralda opened her mouth to reply. "You mean when I pulled you away from Matilda and Ruby?" seeing Esmeralda nod. "I was wondering," feeling herself blush. "Why did you say what you did yesterday... to Brianna and me? How did you know?"

"Which do you want to know?" Esmeralda asked, her eyes never moving from the widow.

"I can't know both?" receiving silence as an answer. Charisma sighed. "All right... why?"

"Because you're both acting like jackasses and I'm tired of it."

Charisma pulled to the side of the road and turned the vehicle off. "Excuse me?" more than a little put out with Esmeralda's bluntness. She was a United States Senator - no one spoke to her with such total disregard of who she was... not even her family.

Esmeralda never moved her eyes from whatever they were focused on beyond her sight. "What part do you need me to explain to you, Charisma?" Charisma didn't respond and Esmeralda sighed. "I'm not trying to disrespect you, Senator Tagherty. You asked why - I gave you the truth. If you're completely honest with yourself, you'll see that I'm right."

Charisma sighed loudly and crossed her arms over her chest. "How did you know?" she finally asked, not refuting Esmeralda's previous words, but unwilling to acknowledge the truth of them of the either. "And why do you care... really?" Esmeralda was quiet so long, Charisma sighed again. "Es? Please?"

"I know because you both talk to me... you talk to me when you should be talking to each other." She grew quiet again, but this time Charisma waited, instinctively understanding that whatever Esmeralda had to share was harder... because it probably involved Saphira in some way. After a bit, Esmeralda took a deep breath and continued, though her voice was so low, Charisma was forced to concentrate to understand her words.

"I told you our story - Saphira's and mine," angling her head to so she could see Charisma's agreement. "Your story is similar to ours - including your reactions to the pain you're going through, and it kills me that you're choosing to be miserable."

"Do you understand what you're asking us to risk?"

"Do you understand the reward is worth the risk?"

"You're assuming everything's just going to work out... like it was some kind of freaking faery tale that always has a happy ending!"

"And you're so afraid to be happy that you won't even try!"

There was no more conversation the remainder of the ride back to Esmeralda's.

************

Charisma dropped Esmeralda at home, innately understanding that a little space would be appreciated, and still prickly over Esmeralda's accusations. Besides, it wasn't like there wouldn't be a steady influx of visitors during the day; everyone had sat down together the evening before and worked out a schedule between them to ensure that Esmeralda would have a stream of company throughout the day. So Charisma waited for Esmeralda to close the door behind her after she entered the house, then turned her vehicle towards her home, knowing no one was expecting her back so early, but unable to stay any longer with Esmeralda's words echoing in her ears.

Esmeralda wasn't surprised to find Matilda and Ruby still ensconced in the kitchen when she finally made her way into the room, but she was a bit startled by Amber's presence. Not that Amber didn't have every right to be there or that Esmeralda didn't appreciate it more than she could say, but Amber tended to shy away from interacting with mortals on the Earthly plane. She said it messed with her Guardian mojo, but Esmeralda knew it had more to do with making their punishment too real.

So she smiled slightly when she saw Amber sitting at the table, making small talk with Ruby and Matilda. She walked up behind her and slipped her arms around Amber's neck, whispering "Thank you," softly into her ear. Amber pulled away just enough to look into Esmeralda's eyes, gently cupping her cheek and studying the myriad of emotions swirling through the flat gray.

"Everything okay?" she asked, knowing Esmeralda would understand what she was really asking. Nothing was even close to okay in their lives anymore, but Amber needed to know if something more had happened, or if Esmeralda had somehow overheard Michael's news. Frankly, Amber didn't want to be anywhere near ground zero when Esmeralda made that particular discovery. No one and nothing would be safe.

"Mr. Prescott called. Charisma drove me over to say goodbye," Esmeralda answered without emotion as she slipped into her chair at the head of the table. Amber's brow furrowed.

"Why didn't you say something, Es? I'd have gone with you."

"I know, Amber, but I needed to do this by myself. I needed to say goodbye... without an audience."

"Charisma didn't go in with you?" Matilda queried.

Esmeralda shook her head. "I asked her to wait in her truck."

"Speaking of... where is the good Senator?"

Esmeralda shrugged, not willing to disclose in front of Matilda the words she and Charisma had exchanged. "I dunno - to work, I guess. The government doesn't stop just because my world came to an end, Amber."

Ruby held up a hand before Amber could open her lips. "I'll bet she headed home so someone else could visit," giving Amber a significant glance, implying knowledge of fact. "People were tripping over one another here yesterday, and she came by herself this morning. I wouldn't be surprised if we had a steady trickle of visitors all day."

As if to confirm her words, there was a quiet knock on the front door, and Ruby excused herself to answer it. Matilda turned her attention to Esmeralda. "I know you don't want to talk about Saphira and I'm going to respect that; but I would like to stay a while longer."

Esmeralda gave Matilda a sad smile. "Matilda, you're welcome to stay as long as you'd like to."

"You realize I'm gonna feed you, right?"

Esmeralda chuckled lightly. "I wouldn't expect anything less of you, Matilda. You've been feeding me almost since we met."

"Well, I have to do something, honey. You were so thin...." She gave Esmeralda the once-over, even though half of her body was hidden by the table at which she was seated. Matilda cocked an eyebrow. "You still are, despite my best efforts, but we'll just keep working at it," she continued without giving Esmeralda a chance to protest. "Joe will be here around lunchtime with a pot roast, and I expect you to make a good effort," she instructed.

Before Esmeralda could response, Patrick crossed the threshold and walked directly to Esmeralda, kneeling in front of her and taking her hands in his. He didn't speak, having been instructed by Ruby about Saphira being off-limits - instead, he simply gazed at her, conveying all the love and sorrow he felt. Esmeralda loosened a hand and cupped his cheek, giving him a small smile.

"Thank you, Patrick," she offered softly.

He nodded. "Anything we can do to help," he stated unequivocally. He squeezed the hand he still held before releasing it. Then he stood and took a seat between Esmeralda and Amber and began to fill her in on when the boys and their families would be arriving in town.

Before he was done, there was another knock on the front door, and once more Ruby excused herself to answer it. And so it went throughout the day - as she had predicted, there was a steady stream of visitors that came to offer their condolences, and though no one stayed long, Esmeralda was exhausted by the time the last one was ushered out hours later.

Amber had long since given up and Esmeralda had nodded her blessing - she understood only too well how overwhelmed Amber felt having to maintain her mortal, human state for so long... especially around so many Earth-born humans.

Ruby, on the other hand, had been a rock. She'd been in the business for longer than Esmeralda, and was well used to dealing with all types of humanity while in her corporeal form. Still, she was more than a little happy to be ushering Okasa out and locking the door behind her. She returned to the kitchen to find Esmeralda with her head resting on the arms she'd folded on top of the table.

"Es? Sweetheart?" frowning when Esmeralda visibly flinched.

"Please don't call me that, Ruby," she asked in a hushed tone. "It hurts."

"Oh Es..." Ruby said, shaking her head. "I'm so sorry. I didn't even think...."

Esmeralda gave her a weak smile. "It's okay, Ruby. I didn't either... until I heard it." She sat up slightly and ran her hands through messy hair. "I'm so tired, Ruby, and we haven't even gotten to the hard part yet."

"I know, Es, but we'll all be here for you, and we'll support you as long as you need us," leaving unspoken the fact that they could already see Esmeralda withering away from them. "I wonder where Brianna was?" she mentioned, changing the subject.

"Kay said something about her trying to put out some kind of fire on the Hill. I think she's still angry because I called her and Charisma out yesterday," Esmeralda added casually.

"So you think Kay was lying?"

"Not at all. I'm sure that's what Brianna told her. Whether Brianna was telling Kay the truth, though...." Esmeralda shrugged. "I'm sure if something really did go down on Capitol Hill we'll hear about it in the news... or one of the others will tell us about it," she added, scrubbing her face with hands that ached from the tension in them. "Where is everyone, by the way? I know they're not all watching now."

"Mal is watching Charisma and Kent, and Jade is watching Brianna. Mal is going to watch through the night and Coral will be taking her regular shift with Brianna. Opal and Indi will be with us tomorrow. After that...? It will depend on our needs."

Ruby watched as Esmeralda ran her hands over her face again, and reached out a tentative hand to offer support. "Es, why don't you go on to bed? It's already been such a long day, and tomorrow is going to be another just like it."

"Only worse," Esmeralda muttered. Ruby nodded her agreement.

"Only worse. Jade will be in soon, and we'll know if Brianna was telling Kay the truth or if she's still put out with you. But somehow, I don't think that would have kept her away from you. She's never struck me as petty like that."

Esmeralda sighed. "Me either, but you didn't see how angry she was yesterday. It may have been too much." She pushed her hair from her face once more, and leaned her shaking arms on the table to help her to rise from her chair. When she was certain that the floor was going to remain beneath her like it was supposed to, she turned to Ruby. "You'll let me know...?"

"If it's something important, Es, you'll be the first. But I'm inclined to let you sleep - you need the rest, and I don't think anything is gonna happen between them tonight or tomorrow at any rate. They love and respect you too much for that. However," Ruby hastened on before Esmeralda could speak, "if it's important, I'll wake you, all right? Trust me... I've been doing this a long time, kiddo."

That address got Ruby the barest sliver of a smile, but it was enough for her to feel a measure of success. She gave Esmeralda a tiny smirk in return and offered her an arm of support. Esmeralda grabbed it and squeezed lightly, then leaned forward and brushed a light kiss over Ruby's cheek.

"Thanks, Ruby. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Ruby patted Esmeralda's hand and opened the door to the bedroom before nudging Esmeralda inside. No words were necessary between them, and Esmeralda was tucked into bed in minutes. Ruby swept the blonde hair off Esmeralda's face, carding her hands through it gently in an effort to relax the tension she could see and feel. Only when Esmeralda's eyes remained closed and her breathing evened out did Ruby halt her ministrations and return to the kitchen. She hoped Jade would report in soon... with news.

************

Brianna had spent the day at the office - part of it anyway - but it wasn't for something that was going to make the news or be read about in the papers. And if Laura Maxwell had her way, none of what had transpired would ever see the light of day.

Brianna's phone had rung early - not that it was an issue. She'd been up for a while thinking about a lot of things... Esmeralda's words rolling round and round again in her head, until Brianna had decided that sleep was an elusive commodity she wasn't going to see that night. Instead, she slid from the bed she was sharing with Kay and pulled on her thick robe before leaving the room. Once the door was closed behind her, Brianna moved straight to the kitchen and heated up water for tea, letting it steep a good long time before she took it to the living room.

She couldn't have said how long she sat there curled under the afghan her grandmother had made staring into the flames made possible by the gas fireplace when she felt Kay tugging at a corner of the cover. Without a word, Brianna opened the blanket and Kay crawled in beside her and waited for Brianna to snuggle into her for warmth. After a long moment, they both sighed and Kay gently hugged Brianna to her.

"You all right?" she asked sleepily. "I know you haven't actually slept yet."

Brianna shrugged. "I keep thinking about what Es said. Part of me is angry and part of me is sad and a little of me is even afraid." She stopped and Kay just waited. "But the biggest part of me just hurts, Kay."

"Why?" Brianna blinked and turned her head to look at Kay disbelievingly. Kay just arched an eyebrow. "It's a legitimate question Bri. Why do you feel the way you feel?"

"I'm angry...." Brianna took a deep breath, closing her eyes as she released it slowly, then breathed in again slowly as she opened her eyes and met Kay's. "I'm angry because she called me out in front of Charisma - and because she was right. I'm sad because seeing Esmeralda like this... Kay, I've seen death - you know that. I've seen what happens when half of a couple is gone. I'm sad because I know what this means for Es... even if it doesn't kill her. She'll always been lonely, even when she's surrounded by people she loves." Brianna paused and Kay just waited, knowing there was more.

"I'm afraid because she was right, Kay; Es was right. I'm furious at Charisma, and I don't know if I can get past that. Sometimes, I'm not sure I even want to try anymore." Kay nodded, but she didn't speak, and Brianna tilted her head in question. "No comment?"

"They're your feelings, Bri. What would you like me to say?" Kay held Brianna's gaze, and after a moment, Brianna just shook her head. "Tell me the rest, Bri."

"I hurt, Kay - I've hurt for a very long time, but I've always been able to keep it in the background, you know? Something I was aware of, but not really conscious of, if that makes any sense. Like I knew there was always a place that belonged to Charisma, but as long as we were out of each other's lives, it was just a dull ache... something I didn't notice unless it got poked."

"And now?"

"Now it's harsh and burning and... I don't know how to describe it, Kay. It just hurts." She laughed grimly. "Funny, huh? A writer with no words."

Kay cupped Brianna's face tenderly. "I have never thought it funny to see you in pain."

Brianna closed her eyes and leaned into the touch; she sighed softly. "What am I going to do, Kay? Everything I've tried has been an abject failure. I can't ignore her anymore; I can't just be friends; I refuse to be the other woman. What's left?"

"Maybe you should try talking together."

Brianna's eyebrows flew into her hairline. "Are you kidding me?!? That's it?? That's all you've got?"

Kay's brown eyes flashed fire and Brianna's widened in response. "Brianna, like it or not, you've been all over the place about her... with her... since you arrived here. You need to sit down and decide what's best for you." Kay sighed and looked at the fire that still crackled merrily along. "As I see it, you've got two basic choices - you either sit down together and talk this out from the beginning until you reach a resolution you both want and can live with...."

"Or?" when the pause went on too long.

"Or you call Michael and tell him to appoint someone else in your place and you walk out of her life - out of *their* lives - forever." Kay took another deep breath. "It's not fair to either of you otherwise, and you can't keep living like this - neither of you can. I know that you've lived with this pain for a long time, lover - it's time to let it go."

Brianna smiled sadly. "Been a long time since you called me that."

"Been a long time since we've been that, but I do still love you, Bri. A part of me always will, remember?" She yawned and stretched, then stood so she could stretch again. Then she turned and tucked the afghan around Brianna's shoulders once more. "I'm going back to bed. It's still dark out, and I need all the sleep I can get before my brood shows up this morning."

"Thanks, Kay," Brianna whispered as Kay walked around the couch. Kay leaned down and brushed a kiss over the top of Brianna's head.

"Anytime, Sweetie. I'll even give you the family discount," she added with a smirk. Brianna snorted.

"Good thing - it's the only way I can afford you." Kay chuckled and continued her trek back to the bedroom, closing the door, but not shutting it completely. Brianna remained on the couch, though her thoughts were a million miles away. It was only when her phone rang a couple hours later that she was pulled from her brown study, only to frown when she saw the name on her screen

What on Earth could Laura Maxwell want with her at six o'clock in the morning??



Chapter XCIX

Brianna had glared at her phone once the call was over, as if it had instigated the entire fiasco she could feel brewing like a hurricane. Instead of tossing it into the nearest wall, however, Brianna merely turned it off and placed in on the nearby table. Then she stretched out, enjoying the sensation of relaxtion as it stole over the length of her body. She closed her eyes, but Laura Maxwell's words continued to echo in her mind until Brianna was growling out loud.

"Who does that bitch think she is?"

"Which bitch?" Kay asked through a yawn. "And why the hell is the phone ringing at six a.m.?" Brianna sat up, smiling sympathetically at the petulant expression Kay was giving her as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. Brianna extended her arm and Kay sat down next to her, pulling the afghan around her shoulders to help retain the warmth Brianna had created.

"Laura Maxwell."

Kay waited patiently, but when all Brianna did was frown, she poked her in the ribs. Brianna squealed and glared at her, but Kay simply returned the glare and shrugged her shoulders. Brianna huffed.

"The phone ringing was Laura Maxwell. It seems she has decided she has an issue with me after all."

"I don't understand."

"I'm not sure I do yet either," Brianna stated. "We don't serve on any committees together, so I've only met the woman once that wasn't in passing, and she didn't appear to have a problem with me then. But if she feels the need to call me before God and the birds are awake for the day, I'd be willing to wager she's found something to bitch at me about... especially since she *demanded* my presence in her office this morning."

"She DEMANDED?"

Brianna snorted. "Oh yes - it was definitely an order. I think she's under the impression that she's a general in the great war of life, and we are just lowly foot soldiers awaiting her bidding."

"So are you going to acquiesce to her demand?"

"I am going to meet with her at the time I told her I was available to be there, but only because I am going to explain a few things to her."

Kay laughed. "I'd love to be able to sit in on that meeting - what time is it scheduled?"

"This morning at eleven. She wanted to meet me at eight; I refused. I want to be here to at least say hi to your family when they arrive, and I've got a couple things to take care of before I'm supposed to be at Es'."

"Are you still planning to go?" Briana looked at Kay like she'd grown a second head. "You said last night...."

"Kay, I would never let something like Es' honesty keep me from standing by her as her friend at a time like this... especially after what she and Saphira did for me when I first got here." She sighed. "Either way, I'd rather she be honest... however embarrassing and painful it is - there is usually less drama in the end. So unless Laura Maxwell keeps me tied up for several hours talking about God knows what in this stinking town, I'll be at Es' this afternoon."

"You don't know what she wants?"

"She refused to say over the phone. But I'll give you a guess."

"Charisma?"

"That's my thought."

************

It was still early when Lee and the kids arrived in town, but Brianna and Kay were waiting for them in the lobby of the hotel they were staying at for the remainder of their time in Washington. After exchanging hugs and salutations, they made their way upstairs to the rooms Kay had already secured for them. The kids followed Kay directly to their room to take care of their things and Lee turned a judicious eye towards Brianna as they walked into the second room. He immediately began to unpack.

"Who pissed you off so early?" he asked without a hint of apology in his voice for either his nosiness or his tone as he hung his suit in the closet. Brianna just smirked.

"That obvious?"

Lee snickered. "Bri, I've known you long enough to see through the political façade bullshit." He stared at her a long moment. "So the question remains - who pissed you off so early?"

Brianna shook her head. "Ask me later. Then I'll know if I have more reason to be angry than simply being woken up before daybreak this morning."

Lee winced. "Ouch." He turned to Kay as she crossed the threshold into their room. How's Es?"

Kay shook her head. "I don't know, honestly. She seems to accept what's happened, but there is something in her eyes.... It's…." She shook her head again. "I don't know," she repeated.

"Are we going to see her today? Or is there some sort of viewing...?"

Kay shook her head. "No viewing - Saphira is supposed to be cremated today. The service is tomorrow morning at ten, and then there will be a gathering at Charisma's for folks to offer their condolences." She glanced at her watch. "Charisma should be with Es right now - we set up a schedule last night so someone would be with her at all times today. You're welcome to go with me, if you'd like." Kay turned her attention to Brianna. "Are the boys going?" Brianna shrugged and Kay shrugged back before looking back at Lee. "It's up to you, sweetie. Whatever you're most comfortable with."

Lee nodded. It wasn't like he knew Esmeralda well. "Let's just play it by ear. A lot depends on the kids."

"I'll try to get back here to watch them if you want to go, Lee," Brianna offered as she glanced at her watch. "I need to get going though. I've got some things I need to do before it's my turn to stay with Es, and some of them can't wait apparently," she added with a growl. Lee's eyes widened and he cocked a brow at Kay who simply shook her head at him. He nodded his understanding and turned back to Brianna as she picked up her purse.

"You have my number if you need me," she reminded them.

"You have mine as well," Kay replied, knowing Brianna understood what she was saying.

"Yes, thank God. Because I'm pretty sure killing stupid people is still considered murder and I really don't look good in orange," Brianna added with a wry grin. She stepped forward and claimed a hug. "Thank you, Kay. You don't know...."

"Yes, I do. Give me a call later - just to let me know how things go. We can talk about it or not as you feel like it."

Brianna kissed her cheek. "Thanks," she whispered again as she pulled back from their embrace. Then she turned to Lee and opened her arms. Without a word, he lifted her up and squeezed her tightly, but with a gentleness belied by his frame. "Thank you for sharing her, Lee," kissing him as well.

He didn't answer except to kiss her back, then he gently put her on her feet. "I want the whole story later," he instructed. Brianna gave him a shaky smile.

"As soon as I can," she promised. Then she called out to the other room. "I need some goodbye hugs," causing a commotion of stomping feet as the kids ran as a group to bury her in hugs and kisses. Then Brianna was out the door and headed to the Mall to meet her first appointment of the day.

************

Charisma was still seething over Esmeralda's words as she pulled back into the garage of her home. But if she was completely honest, she wasn't as angry at Esmeralda as she was at herself. Everything Esmeralda had said - had *accused* her of - was completely true, and that rankled as much as being called out on her behavior. She shut off the SUV and leaned her head on the steering wheel and closed her eyes. The rapping on the window made her jump, and Charisma turned to glare at the disturbance. Kent gazed back at her with concern. She sighed and rolled down the window.

"You all right?"

She thought about the myriad of replies she could give to that question and shrugged. "I will be," she finally offered. "What's up?"

"That's what I was going to ask. You're back early, and you've been sitting here for almost ten minutes."

Charisma shook her head. "I'm trying to figure out if I'm the windshield or the bug."

Kent's eyes went into his hairline. "It's kind of early to be having that kind of a day."

Charisma smirked. "I know," opening the door as she rolled up the window. Kent stepped back to allow her to exit the vehicle. "And yet all indications are it's going to be a bug kind of day."

Kent winced. "Ow. Oh, did you turn your cell phone off?"

Charisma slumped. "Yes. I turned it off when I got to Es'. I guess I forgot to turn it back on. Why?"

"Laura Maxwell's been trying to reach you for the last couple hours. She said it wasn't an emergency, and she refused to leave a message other than that she called, but the phone was ringing every twenty minutes like clockwork. If it wasn't for the fact that your brothers were coming into town today, I would have unplugged it."

Charisma frowned. "Was she rude?"

"Not really rude, per se... but definitely annoying. I realize you need her backing if you want to make a run for the White House, but her people skills leave a lot to be desired."

"You do understand she's one of the most powerful women in America right now?" Charisma asked as she headed towards the house.

"You do understand that doesn't make her any less annoying."

Charisma chuckled and Kent smirked. "It probably makes her moreso."

"Well, whatever - please call her back before you do whatever else is on your schedule today. She already woke Adam up early, so she's not among my favorite people at the moment."

"Where is he now?" Charisma asked as she crossed to the coffee machine.

"In the family room with Okasa. She's going to keep an eye on him for a little while, and then try to put him down for a nap before his cousins arrive."

"Are you going somewhere?"

"Yes. I have an appointment. Bad timing, I know, but it couldn't be helped. I'm going to go straight to Es' from there."

Charisma nodded slowly, hoping Kent would elaborate. When he didn't, she sighed silently and pulled the phone from her purse. "Well, I've turned the phone back on if anything comes up."

"I will. Go take care of your business; I'll be back later." He headed towards the garage, then faced Charisma again as she pulled the fresh coffee from its spot. "Is there anything you need me to pick up on the way back?"

Charisma sipped slowly, letting the air cool her tongue as she savored the taste. "Call me when you leave Es' house. We'll see who's here and what's going on."

"All right," Kent nodded. "Now go call that infernal woman before I have to take out a restraining order," he said with a grin. "Oh! And make sure you call her private line - she was adamant about that." Charisma just stuck out her tongue and waved him off. She waited for Kent to crank the SUV before she headed to her home office, determined to discover what Laura Maxwell needed from her.

************

"Where have you been??" Laura practically screeched in Charisma's ear as soon as she picked up the call. "I've been trying to reach you all morning!"

"I heard," Charisma replied drolly. "Did we declare war somewhere?"

"No... why would you...?"

"Is the threat of nuclear destruction any greater than it normally is?"

"No," sounding a little more impatient.

"Is there a crisis that has shifted us into a Def-Con one status?"

"Well, no, but...."

"Then whatever you're calling about could have waited until a later hour, Laura."

"Even if it's going to affect your Presidential campaign?" Dead silence, and Charisma could hear Laura's smirk in her tone when she spoke again. "That's what I thought."

Charisma pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger as she blew out a frustrated breath. "Laura, I have a friend who passed away and left a distraught wife behind, and you woke up my son with your incessant phone calls this morning. I can honestly say that any type of campaign is pretty much the last thing on my mind right now."

"I heard about the custodian's... partner," Laura enunciated with a hint of hesitancy. "I understand it was unexpected, but we can't let it derail years of work and planning."

"Laura, if taking a couple of days to take care of a friend in her time of need is enough to wipe out all the work I've done and overturn the years of time and effort I have put in serving the constituents of my state, there isn't any amount of power or influence that will make a difference in my campaign for the Presidency."

"Charisma, please don't be stupid. This isn't about you being friends with a custodian - on the contrary, that is something we could easily spin...."

"NO!!" The word wasn't shouted, but the whisper was biting enough to cause complete silence for thirty full seconds. Charisma took a deep breath. "No, Laura. This is not something we're going to spin; this isn't something that is going to be brought up at all. Are we clear?"

"All right, Charisma," Laura replied calmly. "I never said we were *going* to; I simply said that we *could*. However, that is not the reason I've been trying to reach you this morning."

"Which is...?"

"Your rather innocuous announcement of your separation from Kent is stirring up talk and speculation. We need to get out there and be aggressive about this, Charisma."

"Why?"

"What?"

"Why, Laura? What exactly do you expect me to say that I haven't already said? Kent and I have amicably separated by mutual agreement."

"Is that the only reason, Charisma? Are you certain there isn't more to this than an amicable separation?"

Charisma frowned and her voice took on a sharper tone. "What are you implying, Laura?"

"Nothing, Charisma. I'm asking a question."

Charisma frowned and bit her lip. "Laura, Kent and I did agree to separate and we have done so without losing the friendship we've always had. I'm not going to say anything more than that. I refuse to share what are private matters between my husband and myself. And I'm not going to allow Kent to accept sole blame for this situation because it's not his fault." She paused a moment. "It's no one's fault, Laura. It's just something that happened."

Laura blew out a frustrated breath. She knew there was a lot more to this story than Charisma was telling her, but she also understood they had hit an impasse. Charisma wasn't going to tell her anything more than she had already shared. It was fortunate for Laura Maxwell that she had long ago learned to plan for any number of contingencies. She felt positive she would get a better result from the appointment she had scheduled with Brianna Walker. Some days, it paid to keep a private investigator on your personal payroll.

"All right, Charisma," Laura acquiesced quietly. "You know I'm just looking out for your best interests here, right? We can't have anything coming back to bite us in the ass about this later."

"I understand you're doing what you think is best, Laura. But I refuse to deal with any of this until after the service and the wake tomorrow. If it can't wait until Monday, I'll just have to deal with the fallout as it happens."

"I think we can probably release a statement to buy us some time until then, Charisma, but you're going to have to meet with me so we can release a statement to the press as soon as possible. We've worked too hard to get to this point just to let it go due to a lack of diligence on our part. There are too many people counting on us to make this happen."

"I know, Laura... I know. But it's going to have to wait until after tomorrow."

"I understand, Charisma. Oh," Laura added quickly, "I don't really understand *why* you feel this is more important, but I get that you *do*. So let's plan to get together first thing Monday morning, and we'll work up what we need for a press conference."

Charisma sighed. "Fine. That sounds reasonable. I'm going to go check on my son."

"About that - I'm sorry for waking him up. I didn't even consider the fact that he would be home sleeping."

"Fortunately, he's resilient, Laura. He won't even remember it by the time his cousins arrive. I'll talk to you Monday."

"Goodbye, Charisma."

Charisma hung up the phone and sat at the desk for a long moment staring at it before heading out of her office and towards the family room to see Adam.

************

Kent parked the SUV in Charisma's reserved spot, locking it securely then slid into his jacket. The wind blew across him as he stepped out into the open was cold and he spared a moment to shiver as he searched for his appointment. When he found what he was looking for exactly where he expected her, Kent strode forward without hesitation. He reached the bench in front of the National Gallery quickly, and gestured to the empty space.

"May I join you or would you prefer to walk?"

Brianna looked up and nodded towards the seat. Kent sat down and clasped his hands between his knees. Then he took a deep breath, and started to speak.



Chapter C

"Charisma and I go back a long time," he began quietly, "though not as far as the two of you. We met when she was still in the House, so probably three or four years after you...." He felt her nod her understanding and he cleared his throat. "It was casual at first... our acquaintanceship, I mean. We were in some of the same circles because of some of our shared charity interests, so we'd see one another at various dinners and fundraisers and we'd share a bit of casual conversation. But that was the extent of our contact for the first couple years we knew one another."

Kent spared a moment to look at Brianna, but she didn't return his gaze and she didn't speak, so he breathed out slowly and resumed his narrative.

"It wasn't until after Charisma became a Senator that things changed between us, and I have to admit to being a little surprised by it all. Don't get me wrong - we had developed a good, solid friendship by that point. We could talk to each other about practically everything, and we were pretty honest about things." He paused and shook his head. "Most things, anyway." Kent turned and faced Brianna, waiting for her to turn and meet his eyes. "I want you to understand that I didn't know about you, Brianna. If I had...."

She smiled sadly at him. "If you had, it wouldn't have made a difference, Kent."

"I'm not so sure about that."

"I am. Besides, whatever else has happened, you got Adam out of your union with Charisma, and even I can't fault either of you for that. He's a great kid."

Kent chuckled. "He's a handful all right. He's also the reason we decided to get married."

"I don't understand. I thought you got married for Charisma's image."

"We got married because we both wanted a child, and for Charisma's sake, we needed to be married to share that. We cared about one another... still do, actually - but we never loved one another passionately or completely. We loved each other without ever actually being in love." He sighed. "It was a mutually satisfying arrangement whose time is over."

"How can you say that? You still have a child to raise together, and if Charisma wants to make a bid for the White House...."

"Brianna, we can still raise a child together without being married."

"Kent, I'm going to ask you something, and I want you to be honest with me." Kent nodded and Brianna nodded back before looking back over the Mall. "If I hadn't come back into Charisma's life... however peripherally... would you and Charisma have separated?"

Kent offered her a small smile. "Brianna, we were separated long before you came back into her life. We've been living different lives for most of the time we've known one another. Except for a few months when we first married, Charisma and I have been roommates more than husband and wife."

"Why are you telling me all this?"

Kent gave her an embarrassed smile, then dropped his eyes to the ground beneath his feet. "Charisma and I have always been good together - we're friends and enjoy a lot of the same things when we actually spend any quality time with each other. And we learned to be content with what we had together, because it meant we had someone on the occasions we needed them." He paused and Brianna waited. Kent looked out at the Mall, the ghost of a smile crossing his face. "But I had never seen her genuinely happy... until I saw her with you."

Silence reigned for several long moments while Brianna considered his words. Finally... "Why are you so willing to give up everything, Kent?"

Kent shook his head. "You're looking at this the wrong way, Brianna. I'm not giving anything up... except the pretense of a relationship that has served its purpose." He hesitated. "Think of this as coming full circle. The difference is now we're part of one another's circle as well."

"You're assuming I'm willing to do something."

Kent growled and clapped his hands together. "Women!" he muttered, running his hands through his hair before turning his head to look at her. "Brianna, I can't force you to do anything - I wouldn't dream of trying. But Charisma and I are separated, and nothing you do or don't do is going to change that fact. Would it really be so bad to be happy?" Brianna didn't answer and after a few minutes, Kent slapped his knees and rose. "I need to get going. I'm supposed to be at Es' in about fifteen minutes." He gave her a look. "Are you going to be all right?"

Brianna nodded her head, but she refused to speak. Kent watched her a moment longer, then made his way back to his truck. He had places to be.

************

"I'm sorry Brianna wasn't able to come by," Kay offered as she wrapped her scarf around her neck. "I know she was going to try; I guess her meeting with Senator Maxwell ran long."

"Did she really call at six o'clock this morning?" Ruby asked.

Kay nodded and pushed her hair out of her eyes. "Yes. Woke me out of a somewhat sound sleep."

"Any idea what she wanted?"

"She wouldn't tell Bri, but I know that Brianna wanted to be here. She wanted Es to know that her friendship and her honesty were more important to Brianna than Brianna's own anger was. Because that anger is purely self-directed, you know."

Ruby smiled gently and patted Kay's shoulder. "Oh, I know. I've seen a lot in my lifetime. We'll see you at the service tomorrow?"

"Yes. The family arrived this morning. We'll all be there."

"Thank you, Kay. It means a lot."

Kay squeezed Ruby's hand briefly before exiting the house and closing the door behind her. Ruby waited until she heard the car pull out of the drive, and then headed back into the kitchen where they had been receiving people all day.

"Well," she said slowly. "That's everyone except for Brianna and Okasa." A knock sounded on the door and Ruby's head dropped just slightly before she moved back to the door to admit Okasa into their midst. At least this should be the last for the day, and Ruby would be able to send Esmeralda to bed, and find out what was going on with everyone else.

************

Brianna had remained on the bench outside of the National Gallery for a number of minutes after Kent's departure before realizing she was starting to freeze into place with the lack of activity. A glance at her watch told her that she had a few minutes before she needed to leave for the Hill and her appointment with Laura Maxwell. So she mounted the steps and made her way to the Sculpture Galleries, walking briskly until she was standing in front of Diana. She idly wondered if the goddess had ever given up someone she wanted because it was the best choice for the one she loved.

The angle she stood at made Diana's features resemble Saphira and her thoughts turned to what Esmeralda had said to her. And she understood that as far as her friends were concerned anything was worth losing as long as they had one another. Brianna offered up a short prayer for Esmeralda, then turned her footsteps towards the door. She had a meeting to attend.

************

"Senator Walker... please come in. Can I offer you some refreshment?"

Brianna looked at Laura as if she'd grown two heads. "Senator Maxwell, can we please cut to the chase here? You called me at six o'clock this morning DEMANDING I meet with you immediately, so I'm assuming you felt some sense of urgency."

Laura gave Brianna a look of bare tolerance as she gestured for her to take a seat. "It doesn't mean we can't at least attempt an effort at civilization," pouring herself out two fingers of malt whisky before seating herself behind her desk.

"You probably should have thought of that before you called me at oh-dark-thirty this morning. Now, do you want to tell me what was so urgent it couldn't wait or shall I go? I actually do have more important things to do today than sit here and play politics with you."

Laura studied Brianna for a long moment, tapping her fingers against the crystal tumbler. She took a sip and wrapped her hands around it protectively, then leaned forward. "Why are you here?"

Brianna blinked. Whatever else she'd been expecting to hear, this wasn't even a possibility. Her eyebrows rose into hairline. "Are you kidding me?? *This* was your emergency??" She stood up. "I don't have time for this."

"Sit down, Senator Walker."

"Or what, Laura?" dropping the honorific, and smirking at the surprise on Maxwell's face. "What exactly do you think you're going to do to me? I am here by an appointment of the governor of my state because he asked me for a favor. I'm not running for re-election. The only thing of relevance in my being here is doing the best I can for the time I've been assigned. I'm going home when this is over - I have no interest in dealing with the nest of vipers that inhabit this place!" She paused for breath and modulated her tone. "So what exactly do you think you can threaten me with?"

"Charisma Tagherty."

Brianna didn't even blink, and Laura had to give her kudos for her poise. Obviously those acting classes had given her a good foundation, and years in the courtroom had only perfected her technique. Still, Brianna didn't move away from the door, but she was no longer threatening to walk out of it. She tilted her head and cocked an eyebrow.

"How exactly is Charisma Tagherty a threat to me?"

"She's not. You, on the other hand, are an enormous threat to her."

"You might want to ease off on the Scotch, Senator. It's starting to impair your judgment. Charisma Tagherty and I are nothing but old college roommates who fell out of touch years ago. We're merely acquaintances these day."

"I don't think that's true. And I want you to stay away from her."

"Strangely, I'm not particularly concerned with what you do or don't think, Laura. And I'm not going to change my relationship or lack of one with Charisma Tagherty because of your wants."

Laura Maxwell carefully set her glass in the center of her blotter on her desk before using both hands to push her up from her plush desk chair. She glared at Brianna, infuriated at the smirk she was receiving in return. She leaned forward and hissed, "Do you know who I am?"

Brianna grinned widely. "As a matter of fact, Senator Maxwell, I do. But I'm pretty sure you have no idea who *I* am. So before you get your panties so far in a bunch that shit starts running out your nose, I'd suggest you take a real good look at that file your private dick gave you. It might help you find a little respect."

"Why you...!" Brianna held up a finger and Laura Maxwell stopped speaking.

"Don't say anything you can't spin your way out of later, Senator. I'm just a guest on your turf at the moment, but I won't be nearly as forgiving of your attitude once I leave here and return to mine. As far as Charisma Tagherty is concerned, she's a grown woman and she makes her own decisions. I'd suggest you leave her to it. But I promise you I have no influence over anything she says or does. I haven't even offered an opinion to her in years."

"So I'm just supposed to trust that you'll stay off the radar. Senator Walker... she can't afford to have a liability like you around."

"It's funny how she's never mentioned me as a liability."

"Please, Brianna," trying to appeal to her sympathetically. "This is for the good of her campaign."

"Senator Maxwell, I've never interfered with her campaigns before. I have no reason to start now. What Charisma Tagherty does is her business."

"So you'll stay away from her? Brianna, I know what she means to you... or what she meant at one time. Do you really want the world to know?"

"Do you?" Brianna snapped back. "Because if they find out about me, they will certainly find out about Charisma. And without her, your dreams of getting anywhere near the White House go up like so much smoke. It's not like I'm in the closet, Laura, and if you can dig it up, how many others do you think will do the same thing? Maybe instead of trying to intimidate me, you should be more concerned on formulating a campaign strategy so that whatever friendship Charisma and I once had isn't even part of the platform."

"You make it sound so easy."

"You're making it into something impossible. Charisma and I have a history - we were best friends once. But we are merely acquaintance friends now." Brianna sighed and turned back towards the door. "Your detective should have done his homework better." She opened the door, then turned to look at Laura once more. "Don't call me again."

The door behind her shut with a firm click before Laura Maxwell could even think to make a response.

************

Brianna strode from Maxwell's office, and though she knew she was supposed to go see Esmeralda, she recognized she was in no state to visit someone in mourning. The fury that was coursing through her veins at the woman's presumption was making her blood boil, and Brianna knew she needed to calm down. A phone call to her massage therapist got her an immediate appointment, and it wasn't long before she was lying naked on the massage table.

Michelle poured the warm oil into her hands before she started, cringing when she touched the rock hard planes of Brianna's back.

"Should I even ask?" she queried softly as her hands dug into tight, tense muscles. Brianna flinched at the amount of force that was being wielded against her, but shook her head.

"No. But go as hard and deep as you can. I need to be a good friend tomorrow, and right now I'm angry enough to...."

"Hey... relax," Michelle instructed as she ran her fingertips gently over Brianna's bare back. "I'll get you there, but you need to do your part. Focus on your breathing, all right? Put everything else out of your mind."

Brianna nodded and closed her eyes. "Okay, Michelle. And thanks."

"It's what I'm good at, Senator. Now listen to the music, and slow your breathing down to match. Then let me take care of that hard part."

Brianna closed her eyes and hoped Esmeralda would understand why Brianna needed to be in a good place herself before she could be strong for anyone else.

************

Coral had been gone for some time before Jade finally arrived back at the house and Opal, Turq, Jas and Indi were downstairs in the living room with Amber and Ruby when she arrived. She had only just gotten her plate from the warming oven and was sitting down to eat when Michael arrived... sans wings and fanfare. The women in the room just looked at him. He sighed.

"I wanted to let you know - you're all going to be called home tomorrow after the service is over. Your assignment's been completed."

They all looked at him stupefied, the silence ringing loudly in the interim. Finally Amber spoke, "Excuse me? Michael, we told you we were staying with Es for the duration... for however long she needed us. Why are we being recalled again?"

"The mission is over. He's satisfied with the results apparently. You're done here."

"No."

Michael blinked. "You don't get to say no," he stated, though there was a hint of confusion in his tone. "He's the one who decides when an assignment is complete."

"Oh, I'll agree about the assignment - whatever it really was. We've been over that whole concept for a while now. But we're not leaving Es here alone with no support and no family. You can have my wings if you think I'm going to leave her here to fend for herself."

"And do what, Amber? The only person here that has a human job that is hers is Es. You, Coral, Mal and Jade are all non-corporeal entities here. These guys," motioning to the other women seated around the room, "are all holding jobs that will go back to their real life counterparts on Monday. Turq becomes an Amazon woman, and Jasper becomes a large black man. Opal goes back to being a fifty-five year old grandmother and the rest revert to their original states as well! Even Ruby loses her status. How exactly are you planning to manage??" the frustration clear in his voice.

Ruby cleared her throat and all eyes whipped in her direction. "Michael, what happened to cause Him to mark this case as closed?"

Michael shrugged. "He didn't tell me. I was just there when it happened?"

"How long ago was it?"

"A few hours by your time - why?"

"It must have been Brianna," Jade said. "She had talks with both Kent Rockwell and Laura Maxwell today. She took Maxwell down like a dog." Jade's brows furrowed, "I'm still not clear on what either of them were trying to accomplish there, to be honest. But Kent gave her his blessing."

"For...?"

"For Brianna and Charisma to be together."

Silence for a few moments as each of them considered the implications of Jade's words, then Amber turned to Michael once more. "Have you found Saphira?" The rest looked at her like she was crazy, but they waited for an answer. Amber never did anything without a reason.

"Do you really think we need to discuss this now?"

"They're gonna find out sooner or later, Michael.

"Find out what?" from Jas.

"Saphira is missing. She's not in heaven or in hell or in any afterlife I can find. It's like she's simply vanished."

"Did you ever consider that she might have? Angels don't have souls."

"Angels don't die. And humans have souls."

"I'm beginning to think we've all been played," Turq said. "And I don't really like that feeling."

"But to what end?" Opal asked. "What good has any of this done?"

"I bet if we figure that out, we'll know the secret to life," Indi offered with a smirk. "But in the meantime, we need to get to bed. Tomorrow's going to be a hellishly long day."

"Only Monday will be worse if we have to fight to stay here," Amber offered. Everyone nodded. "All right then... everyone off to bed," watching as they waved their goodnights as they headed upstairs. She turned back to Michael. "Thank you, Michael. I know you took a real risk coming here again."

"Maybe. But it was worth it. Take care of each other okay?"

"You too," brushing his lips with hers before he vanished from sight. Then she finished locking up and stretched out on the couch. Tonight she was watching over her own household.



Chapter CI

Esmeralda was glad to take Ruby's advice and escape to the privacy of her bedroom. Even with all the memories of Saphira that permeated the space, it still gave her a measure of comfort. Besides, she was beyond exhausted with the events of the past few days and wanted nothing more than to simply close her eyes and not be for just a little while.

She could hear the rest of her team moving quietly around the kitchen; she was even fairly sure she heard Amber's voice among them. The disturbance didn't last too long, and she figured they had moved into the living room. Just as she finally felt herself slipping into sleep, she thought she heard Michael, but she was too far beyond caring to bother to check. Instead, Esmeralda slid back into the private dell where she'd found Saphira once before, and let herself try to relax.

Esmeralda looked around slowly, surprised to be back in this place so soon. As much as she knew she needed Saphira in her life like she needed air, she honestly hadn't expected that the Father would see things the same way. It made her wonder what was behind her presence here now. But then she caught a whiff of Saphira's distinct scent, and she let her concerns roll to the wayside. There would be time for them soon enough again.

Saphira didn't speak; she simply spooned up behind Esmeralda and covered them with one massive wing. For the longest time they simply lay there curled into one another while Saphira's hand gently stroked Esmeralda's smooth skin. Eventually, however, Saphira broke the silence.

"How are you, love?"

Esmeralda chuckled, but tears leaked from her eyes at the absurdity of the question Saphira posed. She shook her head, refusing to face Saphira while she answered.

"You were cremated today. It was...."

"I can't begin to imagine," was the whispered reply. "You're doing remarkably well, Es. I don't think I would have managed half as much if I was in your place." Saphira snorted. "I'm *not* doing half as well, and all I'm doing at the moment is sitting around marking time. You're still getting things done in the mortal realm." She hugged the body in front of her tightly, feeling Esmeralda return the embrace as much as she could. "I'm proud of you, Es - I love you so much."

"How much longer, Phira?"

"Oh Sweetheart... I wish I knew. It'd be now if it was left up to me; you have to know that." Saphira reached up a hand and brushed some wayward hair out of Esmeralda's eyes. "I do know He closed the books on your mission today. He's pulling the girls off the assignment. He says their job is complete and it's time for them to come home." She paused. "You need to make sure they do."

Esmeralda moved away from Saphira's embrace, rolling until she could stand up and look down at her mate. "Excuse me? Shh...." she cautioned before Saphira could respond. "Let me rephrase - why?"

"I don't know," Saphira offered honestly. "He just gave me time with you in exchange for delivering the message. And I wasn't about to turn that down."

"So you really don't know anything?"

"I know that He closed the file on Brianna and Charisma this morning; that He wants the girls home; that He expects you to make sure they return... even though this is going to be nothing more than a pleasant dream as far as you're concerned. Other than that...."

"So what happened?" Esmeralda asked quietly as she reseated herself next to Saphira. Saphira reached up a hand to help her, and proceeded to pull Esmeralda into her lap. Esmeralda went with the motion, wrapping herself around Saphira's body and simply holding on. She tucked her head into Saphira's neck and relished the light touch that traced up and down her back. Finally, Saphira blew out a breath, though the motion never ceased.

"I dunno, honestly. I'm not sure anyone but He knows to tell you the truth. No one else has His access, and I'm so far out of the loop, I don't even register on the radar at the moment. You probably have a better chance of finding out from whoever's been watching them lately."

"I wonder if they're together then."

Saphira shrugged. "Hard to say anymore, but it seems a little rushed if they are... I mean given Charisma's reluctance to be gay and Brianna's reluctance to trust."

Esmeralda brushed a kiss over the skin of Saphira's neck and smiled when she shuddered against the action. "Well, we can hope for the best while we prepare for the worst again." A sigh. "Does this mean I'll be going home soon as well?"

"I hope so, Es. The only reason you were cast out was to be with me. Since I'm no longer being punished, you shouldn't be either."

There was something about that statement that tickled uncomfortably at the back of Esmeralda's mind, but before she could analyze it, Saphira's touch changed from teasing to something much more intimate. And they put aside their concerns and questions to revel in being together again.

************

When Esmeralda woke she felt comforted, and she smiled, knowing in her heart that Saphira was watching over her. Then her smile fell, because she knew today they would lay Saphira's ashes to rest, and she couldn't fathom anything beyond that.

She stepped from her room to find the kitchen full but silent, and she accepted the cup of coffee Amber handed her without a word. Everyone kept their eyes fastened on the table, and finally Esmeralda cleared her throat, drawing all eyes to her.

"What did I miss?" looking around the table and finding anger and sadness in every pair of eyes that met hers. When she reached Ruby, Esmeralda closed her eyes and sighed. "He's called you home, hasn't He?" wondering why she was so sure about this.

"How did you...?"

"It doesn't matter," Amber cut in. "We're not going. Not without you."

Esmeralda smiled gently, the sadness in her eyes cutting deeply into each of them. "Yes, you are, Amber. When He calls, you go. No," she said, holding up a hand to keep Amber from commenting. "I am still in charge of you until He releases you from my supervision. He can't do that until you go home. So you're going to go home and make your reports and whatever else He asks of you, because I'd like to know you'll all be there if I ever need you again."

"You need us now."

"Amber, Saphira is dead, and nothing you or I can do is gonna change that. I have to learn to be alone. You have to continue to do His work so you can keep an eye on me now and then. If you give up your place, then who's gonna keep an eye on me, hmm?"

Amber scowled fiercely and crossed her arms over her chest. "I don't like you very much right now. You cheat."

"And she's right," Ruby stated softly. "We can do more for her from there than we can from here. As much as we'd all like to stay, if Es wants us to go, we should respect that - it's her call. And it's not like we can't come visit, right?"

"Right," Esmeralda agreed with a watery smile. "Please, Amber. Do this for me if you won't do it for yourself."

Amber continued to glare at Esmeralda. "You don't play fair at all."

"I'm not playing, Amber. This is my life now... my reality. There's not much you can do for me on the mortal plane, but if you're on the heavenly one.... Who knows?"

Amber sighed deeply. "Fine. But I expect you to make some serious effort into surviving here... into living. You have to take care of yourself, Es. No starving yourself or giving up and dying. I will haunt your afterlife if you put me through something like this again."

"I'll do my best, Amber, but remember... I'm human now. And I will die."

"Me first," Amber muttered. "No more coffee then - milk and water only."

"Chocolate milk?" Esmeralda bartered.

"Fine. But no adding extra syrup to the ready-made stuff." She glared. "I know you. I've seen what happens to the chocolate syrup when you think no one else is looking," attempting to lighten the atmosphere with her levity.

"Deal," Esmeralda said solemnly. Then she looked around the table. "Thank you... all of you... for the time and effort you've each put in on this project. I can't say it was worth it...." She looked at Ruby. "Was it worth it?"

Ruby shook her head. "We can't tell. Jade said there was conversation, but none of us can figure out if it actually means anything or made any kind of difference in the outcome. As far as we know, they are still not together."

Esmeralda nodded. "Still, I appreciate everything you've all done to bring this mission to whatever conclusion that's been reached. I know it's not the kind of ending we like, but...." She shrugged. "I'll make sure to commend each of you for your efforts in my report. You're proficiencies shouldn't suffer because of this assignment."

Turq snorted. "Pretty sure none of us are worried about our proficiency ratings, Boss. You sure some of us can't stay here and...?"

"No, Turq. I appreciate it - more than I can express to you. I'm hoping after you all make your reports, He'll call me home. But I'm confident He won't let me go home before then."

"She's got a point," Ruby commented softly. "But the fact remains that if Es wants us to go home now that we've been called, we have an obligation to go." She looked at her watch. "However, if we're all going to go to the service, we need to start preparing. Jas and Turq first, as I'm sure they'll be called upon to drive today."

The two nodded and rose, each pausing behind Esmeralda to offer a silent condolence, then they headed upstairs to their bathrooms. It was time to start what promised to be a very long day.

************

The service itself was rather short - both Charisma and Brianna spoke briefly, and Amber gave a beautiful eulogy. What caught Esmeralda by surprise was the number of Very Important People that attended. Every Senator from her floor was there, as were many of their staffers and drivers. Combined with Charisma's extended family, Kay's family, Matilda and Joe, her entire team and a few Angels who'd descended just to offer her their unspoken support, the chapel was full to standing room only capacity. She was certain she'd even seen Michael in the back once, but when she turned to look for him again, he was gone.

When the service was over, Brianna took Esmeralda, Amber and Ruby in her car, and they followed Charisma's car in what became a massive processional to Charisma's home. Then it was a matter of greeting everyone and accepting their condolences. For Esmeralda, this was actually harder than sitting through the service had been. The only thing harder that she'd experienced to date was actually being forced away from Saphira's body the night she had died. Like then, it simply brought home the fact that Saphira was permanently gone from her life. And though she knew Saphira would watch over her when she was able, that fact offered little comfort to Esmeralda.

Still, she bore everyone's words with good grace. She knew they meant well, and in the mortal scheme of things, many of these people were considered above her. So she accepted their condolences with a sad smile and either a handshake or a brief embrace, knowing that most of them would never understand what this loss felt like to her.

Once she was done receiving everyone, Esmeralda looked at Charisma who flanked her on one side due to her hostess status. Charisma's eyes wandered over Esmeralda's face, taking in the exhaustion and sadness. Without a word, she took Esmeralda's hand and tucked it into the crook of her elbow, finding Okasa's concerned gaze and nodding towards the stairway. Okasa nodded her agreement and assumed the hostess reins. Charisma led Esmeralda upstairs.

They reached the master bedroom, and Charisma went in first, flicking on a light and crossing to close the curtains. Then she went to the closet and pulled a blanket and pillow from the shelf before turning back to Esmeralda who was now regarding her warily. Charisma gave her a small smile.

"I'm playing the 'mom' card, Es. You're exhausted," motioning to the bed. Esmeralda sat down automatically, but looked at Charisma with confusion.

"But...?" gesturing to the floor and the downstairs area where so many people were still socializing.

"But you need some rest." She knelt and removed Esmeralda's shoes before lifting her feet onto the bed; she smiled when Esmeralda lay down as a matter of course. "I can handle the people downstairs for a little while, and I promise to come wake you before the mass exodus," pulling the cover up to Esmeralda's chin and rubbing her shoulders carefully until the green eyelids fluttered shut. "Trust me to take care of things, Es. It's my job - I'm really good at it." Charisma brushed the back of her hand over Esmeralda's soft cheek. Esmeralda caught the hand in her own.

"Amber?"

"I'll keep an eye on her as well, Es. Or do you want me to send her to you?"

"Thank you, Charisma."

Charisma squeezed the hand she held, then released it and left to find Amber.

************

It wasn't hard - with Esmeralda's departure, the gathering had broken along expected lines. The Senators, except Brianna and Charisma were gathered in Charisma's study. The drivers and office personnel, aside from those who were part of Esmeralda's team, had assembled in the formal living room. Charisma's adult members of extended family and Kay's family were ensconced in the kitchen and Amber and the Angels were in the family room with the kids.

Charisma didn't garner the first ounce of attention when she crossed the threshold; even Adam didn't look up from where he sat on Amber's lap. Charisma chanced to wonder what sort of magic Esmeralda's and Saphira's family had that they could mesmerize those around them so easily. Then Amber saw her and her words ground to a halt as she turned to look at Charisma.

"Senator Tagherty?"

"Charisma please, Amber. Es has asked for you." Amber frowned, and Charisma continued. "She's upstairs laying down. She was so tired...." Amber nodded.

"Thank you, Sen... Charisma." Amber set Adam on his feet, and he ran straight to Charisma.

"Mama? Go see Es?"

Charisma lifted him with a groan. "Maybe you can help me wake her up after she has a little bit of a nap, Sweetie. Es is having a really bad day and we need to let her rest for a little while, okay?"

Adam stared at her for a long moment before nodding his agreement. "'Kay! Can we go find Br'anna?"

"I think Senator Walker went outside for some air," Opal offered. "Maybe Adam and I could go look for her while you and Amber take care of Es?"

Charisma and Adam exchanged a look and then Charisma set him on the floor so he could run to take Opal's hand. "C'mon, Op. Let's go find Br'anna," tugging her towards the door. Then without warning he dropped her hand and ran back to Amber, who knelt down to meet him at his level. Adam threw his arms around her neck. "Love Amber - love Es."

Amber hugged him back gently. "I'll make sure to tell her, Adam." He grinned and ran back to Opal, taking her hand and pulling her from the room. Amber and Charisma turned to leave the room when Harley spoke up.

"Is there anything we can do Aunt Chari?"

Charisma motioned around the room that was filled with behaving, quiet children. "You're doing it, Harley. Thank you." Then she and Amber left the room and headed upstairs.

************

Charisma led Amber to her room and then excused herself to tend to the rest of her guests. Amber waited until she was down the stairs before she opened the door, glad her vision allowed her to see in the near dark. She walked swiftly towards the bed, sitting on the edge and letting her hand rest on Esmeralda's back. Then she settled herself in to wait.

************

Opal had to slow Adam down long enough to put a coat on him before they left the house, but as soon as that chore was accomplished, they headed out into the backyard. The pool was covered, and the garden was only partially visible - the greenery was in place, but much of the color that was so obvious throughout the spring and summer months was yet unplanted. It made it easy to see that Brianna wasn't in the immediate vicinity. It made the pool house the most logical choice of locations, but Opal hesitated to trespass. Then Adam took the decision out of her hands.

"BR'ANNA!!" yelled at the top of his lungs.

Brianna stuck her head out of the pool house door and looked first at Adam, then Opal, before turning her attention back to Adam again.

"Adam? Is there a problem, Sweetheart?"

He shook his head. "Found Br'anna. Love Br'anna."

Brianna smiled. "I love you too, Adam." She looked at Opal. "Was there something...?"

Opal shook her head. "No, Senator Walker. Adam wanted to visit Es, but she's resting, so he decided we needed to find you. I volunteered to help him." She paused a moment, then spoke again. "Is everything all right, Senator? Is there something I can do?"

"No, Opal - thank you. I just needed a little air. I'll be in to say goodbye shortly."

"NO!" Adam exclaimed. "Br'anna come now."

"Adam...."

"Br'anna come," he pleaded, tugging on her hand. "Please?" giving her a beguiling smile. Brianna and Opal swapped eye rolls, then turned their attention to Adam.

"How do you say no to that?" she asked, extending a hand to Adam who took it with alacrity, bouncing on his toes in excitement. "Come on, Adam. Let's go see if Gramma has any hot chocolate on the stove. It's cold enough out here to need some, don't you think?"

He nodded vigorously and took Opal's hand as well. And together they made their way back into the warmth of Charisma's home.



Chapter CII

Amber wasn't sitting by Esmeralda's side for very long before the green eyes fluttered open. Esmeralda remained still for a long moment while Amber continued to gently rub her back; when she was coherent enough to recognize the touch, she deflated just slightly, then turned on her side to meet golden eyes with her own. Amber let her hand fall to the curve of Esmeralda's waist, only her thumb stroking the flesh beneath it.

They held one another's gaze for a number of minutes - silently communicating so many things. Finally, Esmeralda lifted a hand to cover the one resting at her hip and Amber looked down at the warmth enveloping her hand. She sighed.

"I suppose it's time?" a question, but said more like a statement.

Esmeralda nodded although Amber was no longer looking at her to see the motion. "I think so. You know you're gonna have to go first; the rest won't go otherwise."

"This sucks."

Esmeralda gave her a miserable smile and nodded. "It does." No platitudes and no gilding of the truth - just plain, unvarnished facts.

Amber clutched Esmeralda's hand in hers and just held it tightly for a moment. "I want you to know - I'm going to ask to be assigned to you for a while... either as your Guardian or in human form."

"Amber...."

"Es, I can't not do *something*. Please don't ask me to."

Esmeralda sighed and shook her head. "I won't Amber - it would be akin to trying to stop a flood with a bucket and paper towel. But," she added more forcefully, causing Amber to look at her, "if He says no, I expect you to abide by His answer."

Amber huffed, but nodded her head. "All right."

Esmeralda studied her expression, seeing the resignation that meant Amber would keep her word despite her desire to do otherwise. She nodded. "Thank you," she offered quietly, tugging gently on the hand she still held. Amber frowned and put her other hand on the bed to keep from being pulled off-balance.

"Es!!"

"Amber, I want a hug before you go."

Amber's eyes went to her hairline. "Oh. In that case...." She offered Esmeralda her other hand and pulled her into a sitting position. Then she pulled her into a tight hug and held on for dear life for a long time. Eventually, though, Esmeralda pulled back enough to brush a kiss over Amber's cheek. Amber released her hold around Esmeralda's waist to shift her hands to cup her face instead. She kissed her forehead then leaned their foreheads together.

"I know I'm not Saphira, Es, but I love you, okay? So please don't make me have to go through this again for a really long time, all right?"

Esmeralda smiled tenderly. "I'll do my best, Amber... promise."

"Best I can ask then, I guess." She pressed her lips to Esmeralda's forehead once more, then sighed and stood. "I'm sure the girls will stop by to say goodbye before they leave." Esmeralda nodded. Amber looked around the room awkwardly and ran a hand through her hair. "Right," she mumbled and straightened her shoulders. Esmeralda watched as Amber's human clothing melted away to be replaced by her angelic garb. Once the robing was in place, Amber stretched out the wings that had been put away for the short duration she had appeared as a human after Saphira's death. "Ahhh...."

Esmeralda chuckled. "Better?"

Amber snorted. "I'd say you have no idea, but that wouldn't be true. I don't know how the rest of you endure that like you do. The only happy part of it is when it's over."

"True, but in fairness, I think our wings work a little different."

"Ow," Amber grumbled when something popped she wasn't entirely sure was supposed to. "I certainly hope so. One more hug before I go?" she asked, opening her arms and spreading her wings to their maximum reach. Esmeralda nodded and stood.

"I'm gonna miss you, Amber."

"Same here, Little Sister. Love you."

"Love you too. Now go home." And with that, Amber disappeared from sight and was gone.

Esmeralda stood still for another long moment, then drew in a deep breath. She couldn't say it didn't hurt to have to send her family home with no indication of being able to return herself in the near future. But she knew she was right about them leaving her behind. She'd manage - she just wasn't sure what she expected her outcome to be... and she wasn't sure it mattered anymore.

She crossed back over to the bed and folded up the blankets she'd been using, then took it and the pillow and placed them neatly on the chair near the bed. Esmeralda stepped into her shoes, and headed downstairs.

************


"GRAMMA!" Adam cheered as they crossed the threshold into the kitchen from the backyard. It caused every family member in the kitchen to look in their direction and smile when they realized that Adam had managed to reclaim their lost sheep. Brianna tried to appear nonchalant about the whole business, but it was difficult when she was surrounded by the family she felt she had abandoned for the sake of her sanity. And then Okasa was approaching her and Brianna offered a tentative smile. Okasa squeezed her arm briefly before turning to Adam.

"So what brings you to the kitchen?" knowing she would need to go check on the plates of hors d'oeuvres and finger foods that had been set out for the numerous guests still occupying Charisma's home, but glad to be out of the melee for the moment.

"Hot chocolate," Adam said with a grin. "S'cold outside."

Okasa chuckled lightly. "I'd heard rumors to that effect, actually. All right, but you're going to have to be my helper - I don't have any ready."

"Adam good helper," he assured her as he started pulling at the buttons of his coat. Brianna took pity on him and knelt in front of him to remove his outerwear. Almost as if that was some sort of sign, several people started moving around the kitchen. The girls went to take more plates of food into the dining room and two of the boys and Paddy went to check on their various guests. Only Brianna, Okasa, Adam, Opal and Hunter were left in the kitchen. Opal immediately excused herself, citing a need to check with Charisma before she took her leave.

Brianna rose from her knees as Adam took Okasa's hand and walked to the big stove to start preparing enough hot chocolate for the entire family. She watched for a moment before deciding that having Adam's coat in her hand was reason enough to leave the kitchen; from there she could either slip upstairs and keep an eye on Es or simply leave. Brianna knew that was the coward's way, but she was so tired.

Before she could move, however, Hunter stepped up beside her to gain her attention, then waited for her eyes to meet his. He could see so many things swirling around in the depths of her gaze, but he was counting on twenty years of being friend and family to her to outweigh all the negative things he could literally feel her struggling with. When her shoulders slumped, he knew he'd been offered a reprieve, and motioned towards the foyer.

"May I walk with you?" asked politely.

"Br'anna?" Adam asked, cocking his head curiously and nearly enveloped by the apron Okasa had swathed him in. "Hot chocolate?" She gave him a weak smile.

"I'll be back, Little Man. I need to hang up your coat and check on Es, okay?"

"'Kay!" he agreed emphatically, turning his attention back to stirring the milk. Just then, Harley entered the kitchen holding Michelle's hand, and Adam's attention was immediately directed towards them. Hunter and Brianna escaped out the other door, seeing the rest of the grandchildren start streaming in from the family room.

Brianna slowly walked up the stairs towards Adam's room, and Hunter kept pace right beside her though neither of them spoke a word. They entered the bedroom and Brianna smiled in reflex at how perfectly 'Adam' it was. She crossed to the closet, giving Hunter a look.

"Can you please say whatever it is you need to say, Hunter? I don't mean to be rude, but this weekend has already been years long, and I'm not sure how much more I can take."

He gazed at her thoughtfully, though he maintained his respectful attitude. As much as he wanted to offer her comfort, Mama had given them all strict instructions about keeping their distance and allowing Brianna to instigate any familiarity between them.

"Is there anything I can do to make it better?" he finally asked. Brianna's chuckle was weary.

"I wish a hug would make it better, Hunter. I really do. But I gave up believing in faerie tales a long time ago." She shook her head and sighed. "I'm sure that's not what you were going to ask."

"I wasn't going to ask anything, actually. I was elected to reiterate what Mama said to you the other day." He held up a hand. "Mama sat all of us kids down and told us what you did and why. She asked us to respect your decision. We talked about it and just wanted you to know that we'll do our best to abide by your wishes. But if you should ever change your mind...."

"I... thank you, Hunter. I wish it didn't have to be like this, but I don't know what else to do at this point. I can't keep...."

This time, he opened his arms, and Brianna stepped willingly into his embrace. "We understand, Bri - probably as much or better than you do. That's why we agreed to do as you asked."

She nodded her head against his chest and gave another brief squeeze before pulling out of the hug. It was harder than she'd ever expected. "I'm going to go check on Es, and then Ill be back in the kitchen. I promised Adam, and I'd like to say goodbye to everyone since they're all here."

Hunter smiled and wiped at his eyes unashamedly. "They'd like that - they all would." He motioned her out of the room in front of him and closed the door behind them. "Would you like some company or should I wait for you downstairs?"

But before Brianna could give him an answer, the door to the master bedroom opened, and Esmeralda exited. Immediately they flanked her on either side.

"Es?" Brianna asked as she looked her over carefully. Esmeralda didn't appear any more rested than she had before Charisma had brought her upstairs, but there was a calm resignation in her demeanor that made Brianna and Hunter frown.

"I need to get downstairs so everyone will leave Charisma's home, and you can all get back to your normal lives."

"Es, if you need to rest a while longer, Charisma is perfectly capable of dismissing everyone here without twitching an eyelash."

"It's okay, Brianna," Esmeralda replied, giving her a small smile. "I need to do this. I need to say goodbye."

Brianna and Hunter exchanged alarmed glances, then Brianna took Esmeralda's hand in hers. "All right, Es... all right. We'll go downstairs together, then Hunter will let everyone know you want to say goodbye, okay?"

Esmeralda nodded jerkily, and Hunter headed downstairs instantly. A whistle brought his brothers running, and in another minute, the family had scattered throughout the house to let everyone know that Esmeralda wanted to say goodbye to them.

For most, the pleasantry was perfunctory at best, and they were glad to be done with it so they could return to normalcy tomorrow. Though they liked Esmeralda and appreciated her efforts on their behalf, none of them really knew her beyond greetings and casual talk at work. And though they were all glad they had taken the time to offer their support of her in her hour of need, they couldn't fathom the sense of loss she radiated from the depths of her soul. So it was with a great sense of relief that they bid her adieu and left Charisma's home to go back to their lives.

Only the Angels were different. And they were different for so many reasons beyond human, though no one but they and Esmeralda knew the truth about that, of course. But they chose to be the last to go, and they took a little more time to say goodbye, knowing it was going to be the last interaction they had with Esmeralda for the foreseeable future.

She watched as they changed from human to Angel, and wondered that no one commented on the differences in either their appearance or their demeanor. Only Turq and Jas remained as they still had responsibilities to fulfill that evening. They would transform once they had been dismissed at the end of the day. Still, the lack of reaction left Esmeralda a little confused; it was only when Ruby leaned forward and reminded her that no one could see what they didn't want seen, that Esmeralda realized she was beyond much lucid thought.

Then Adam scooted from the kitchen and stopped short, gaping at the sight in front of him. "Angels," he commented, reaching out a hand to brush against Ruby's robe. "Br'anna... Angels," speaking to the woman who had stayed by Esmeralda's side. She looked at him even as the Angels exchanged exasperated glances. They had forgotten they could hide from everyone except the innocents and Adam was still young enough to be such.

Fortunately, Brianna simply agreed with his assessment of the group of women saying their goodbyes to Esmeralda and she turned to them with a tired smile. "I think we should probably go find Mama and see how that hot chocolate's coming along. Es, will you be all right for a few minutes?" not wanting to leave her alone, but confident that Esmeralda wasn't up to Adam's energetic enthusiasm either. Esmeralda nodded.

"I'll be okay, Brianna. Thank you for keeping me company."

Brianna nodded. "Come to the kitchen if you get done before I get back. I promised I'd have hot chocolate and say goodbye to everyone before I left, and I'm giving you a ride home," her tone brooking no argument. Esmeralda simply bobbed her head in acknowledgement and Brianna sighed in relief. Then she lifted Adam into her arms with a groan and turned back towards the kitchen. The Angels waited until they were gone, then Ruby stepped forward and wrapped Esmeralda in a hug.

"Amber already gone?" she asked, tucking a stray strand of hair behind Esmeralda's ear.

"Yes. I sent her first. I knew she'd be the hardest." The rest smiled.

"We'll miss you Es," Opal chimed in, claiming a hug for herself.

"You know where to find me if He lets you visit."

"We do indeed," Indi agreed.

"We'll be watching," Mal offered. Jade and Coral didn't say anything - just took their hugs behind Mal. When each Angel had had her turn, Esmeralda stepped back slightly.

"Go now. And thank you all... for everything."

They bowed their heads to her for a brief minute, and then they were gone. Esmeralda stood in the foyer for another long moment gathering her strength, then she turned and headed in the direction Brianna had gone.

************

Charisma stood in her empty study, appreciating the silent respite even while she knew it couldn't last but a minute. She and Kent had decided to tell the family about their separation, and she was fairly confident that it was going to create an uproar... even if it was only of miniscule proportions. Because while she knew her family would support whatever decision she made... especially if it brought Brianna back to them... she wouldn't have them blaming Kent for ruining her career. And she knew as well as she knew she was a United States Senator that they would try to blame him.

So she stood in the silence simply breathing, trying to muster her courage for the upcoming ordeal. She jumped when a hand landed on her arm and she cut her eyes at the intruder. Then Charisma chuckled when she realized it was Kent standing by her side.

"You all right?" asked with concern.

"Yes. Just trying to prepare myself for the inevitable fallout."

"Charisma, I think you're overestimating their reaction - I mean, if I figured out about you and Brianna in just a few months, do you really think the people who have known you both for twenty-five years are really going to be surprised?"

"It's not that - well... not *just* that." Kent smiled at her.

"I don't mind being the scapegoat, Charisma. After all, I *did* have the papers drawn up."

"NO!" Charisma replied forcefully. "I'm not going to lie about this, Kent. You may have drawn up the papers, but this is on me. I was the one who wasn't totally honest."

"And tomorrow? When you talk to Senator Maxwell?"

Charisma sighed. "She's not going to like it, but she's going to need to know the truth."

"If it makes you feel better, Charisma, I think you might actually find real happiness with Brianna."

"Only if I get another chance, Kent, and I'm not sure she's willing to give me one," shaking her head to hide the tears even as she smiled for him. "You, on the other hand, should definitely be able to find your heart's desire now."

"Yee-eah," he drawled, scratching his chin idly. "It might help if I knew what that was."

Charisma laughed. "At least you have the opportunity to figure it out. C'mon," she sighed, tangling her fingers lightly through his. "Let's go do this." And together they left the office and moved towards the kitchen... united in purpose one more time.



Chapter CIII

The entire Tagherty clan was in the kitchen when they entered - even the children. It was obvious they were all bidding Esmeralda and Brianna goodbye, and though loath to interrupt their limited time with Brianna especially, Charisma knew she would regret not seizing this opportunity if she let it pass her by. Besides, if it worked out the way she hoped it might, Brianna would be back in their lives on a more permanent basis, so saying goodbye would become a moot point.

Charisma felt Kent squeeze her hand fleetingly before releasing it and urging her forward gently. Charisma stepped further into the room and cleared her throat, drawing all eyes to her. Kent stayed just behind her, offering his support while maintaining his distance.

Charisma looked around the room slowly, meeting the eyes that were staring back at her. The kids - all of them - were mostly confused; her brothers and their wives questioning; her parents hopeful. She chanced to wonder about that reaction, curious to know if Kent had spoken to them privately beforehand, but before she could settle into that line of thought, her eyes caught Esmeralda's and she flinched at the loneliness and pain reflected back at her. She took a deep breath and finally looked at Brianna, who was courteous enough to hold her gaze, even though her eyes were shuttered against Charisma's. She winced at the pain that lanced through her at that truth, but she kept her eyes firmly focused on Brianna and stayed the course of action she had chosen.

"Kent and I have something to say, and I want all of you to understand that he is not to blame for this. This was a mutual decision, but I bear the responsibility for the outcome." She paused and sucked in a nervous breath, never breaking her stare with Brianna. "Kent and I have decided to separate, and will in all likelihood be proceeding to divorce in the near future. It is completely amicable." Here her eyes left Brianna's and traveled around the room to meet with each adult member of the family. "I don't want him treated like some sort of pariah - he is still Adam's father and part of this family."

"And what about your career?" Kay asked and Charisma smirked. She'd expected the doctor to be the one to bring that up no matter how much the rest wanted to know. Though they had only known one another very short time, Kay had never been one to pull her punches, and Charisma appreciated the honesty that came with that approach. She shrugged, eyes locking on Brianna's once more.

"I am learning that some things are worth fighting for and that others aren't as important as I once believed." Brianna finally dropped her eyes to the floor and Charisma shifted her gaze to Kay. "If the voters I have worked twenty years serving cannot accept my honesty with myself despite everything...?" She shrugged again. "I guess I'll be looking for another job when this term is over."

"Does that bother you?" Esmeralda asked quietly.

Charisma looked at her thoughtfully, and the rest waited to hear what she had to say. After all, the Presidency had been her dream for as long as any of them could remember and she'd worked her whole life towards that singular goal. "Not like you'd expect it to. Laura's probably going to have a fit - we've been working together towards this for years. But at the end of the day...? I'm not sure it's all been worth it."

"And what of you, Son?" Patrick queried, shifting everyone's attention to Kent. "How do you feel about all this?"

Kent cleared his throat. "I think it's a good thing. I believe Charisma will eventually find happiness," giving Brianna a pointed look, "and I couldn't ask for more than that."

His words seemed to be a catalyst and the room was suddenly alive with a cacophony of sound and movement as most of the family began shifting their attention away from Charisma and Kent and back to what they had been engaged in beforehand. Patrick claimed Kent and Okasa collected Charisma and without realizing what had happened, Charisma looked up to find Brianna gone and Esmeralda on her way out. She looked at Mama, who just nodded her permission. Charisma clenched Okasa's hands, then scooted towards the kitchen door as rapidly as she could manage. She didn't notice how the room quieted behind her when she crossed the threshold into the foyer.

Brianna was just opening the door for Esmeralda when Charisma caught up to them.

"Brianna!!" seeing the slight slump of shoulders when she called out and feeling pain of that reaction cut into her again. Steeling herself, she took a deep breath and lowered her voice. "Wait... please."

Esmeralda and Brianna traded stares for a moment, then Brianna nodded to her once. Esmeralda put a comforting hand on her arm and squeezed it affectionately, then she turned to face Charisma. Charisma forced herself to look away from Brianna, knowing Esmeralda would recognize the naked longing in her eyes and not caring. More than anyone, Esmeralda would understand and forgive her for it. She opened her arms and Esmeralda stepped into her embrace.

"Thank you, Charisma... for everything. I would have said something earlier, but you and Mama were so deep in conversation, I hated to interrupt. I just figured I'd tell you tomorrow."

Charisma pulled back enough to cup one hand around Esmeralda's cheek. "Thank you for letting us do something for you, Es. Though we'd rather there never have been a reason, you know?"

Esmeralda nodded and whispered, "I know."

"As for interrupting... you wouldn't have been. And if you need someone to talk to or you need to get out of the house for a little while - day or night, you call me, okay? You're always welcome."

"Thank you, Charisma." They hugged again once more, then Esmeralda was out the door and into the waiting limo, leaving Brianna and Charisma standing awkwardly alone in the foyer. Brianna finally broke the uneasy silence.

"Was there something you needed, Charisma?"

Charisma studied Brianna, seeing so much swirling in the depths of her eyes. She bit her lip and nodded. "I need you to know that what happened between Kent and me was not your fault. Your coming here may have been the catalyst that spurred us to actually take action on the situation, but you did nothing to influence the decision we reached. Our marriage as an intimate relationship was over long before you ever stepped foot in Washington, D.C.."

Brianna blinked slowly and sighed. "Why are you telling me this, Charisma?" an underlying hint of sadness in her tone.

"I know I've made a complete mess of everything between us - from letting you walk out of my life twenty years ago to being an ass towards you when you got here to thinking nothing had to change between us once I knew your truth to rushing the pretense of a friendship that we both managed to ignore until it was gone. So many things I've done wrong where you and I are concerned." She dropped her eyes to the ground and shook her head, hoping to clear her eyes of tears before she looked up again. "If I could go back...."

"If wishes were horses," Brianna muttered.

"Beggars would ride - exactly," Charisma finished with a soft chuckle. "However, I know the only way through is straight ahead... no reset button, right?"

Brianna snorted, knowing Charisma knew that reference strictly due to Adam. "Right," she agreed.

"Right," Charisma repeated. "So, um... I know that you've already given me a couple chances to get this right, and I keep screwing things up left and right and sideways. But I've spent the last few months trying to come to terms with things about myself that I've spent a lifetime denying. I still haven't gotten through most of my issues - it may take me the rest of my life to work through them all. But I am trying now and I was wondering if you might be willing to offer me one more chance... because as much as I don't want you and the family to break-up, I'm self-aware enough to acknowledge that I don't want to give you up either... not again. I'm selfish that way." She paused and Brianna waited, recognizing the signs that indicated that Charisma wasn't finished.

"Esmeralda was right, you know - at least as far as I'm concerned. I AM scared - not so much of what people will think... or even of what this could do to my career." She saw Brianna's brow cock derisively and shook her head. "I am a little scared - politics is all I've ever known... all I've ever been a part of my entire adult life; I'm not sure what I would do instead, but I imagine the family is already working on ideas," seeing Brianna reflect the smirk that crossed her face, "and knowing they'll be behind me regardless...." She drew in a breath. "But I AM scared of letting you down... of not being what you need me to be... because my track record where you're involved is abysmal."

"Charisma...."

"Brianna, please," she pleaded, tilting her head towards the ceiling so Brianna wouldn't see the tears slide down her face.

"Charisma, look at me." Charisma closed her eyes and released a shaky breath before bringing her hands to her face to wipe her tears. Only then did she turn her gaze to Brianna. Brianna sucked in a breath of her own and bit her lip - she'd never been able to stand to see Charisma cry, and to know she was ultimately the cause of this particular breakdown....

"What exactly are you proposing?"

Charisma couldn't stop the hope that flared in her eyes, but she replied calmly, "I'd like us to start over... really start over. I know we can't actually unlearn the things we know about each other, but it seems like maybe if we go back to how we were in the beginning... when we were getting to know one another, that perhaps we could learn about the people we are now."

"And the fact that I love you...."

Charisma took an uneven breath. "I am still trying to understand that about us, because I'm pretty sure I...." She stopped speaking when Brianna's fingers covered her lips.

"No," she instructed with a shake of her head, rushing forward when she saw the tears flood Charisma's eyes once more. "No, I don't want you to say it until you're sure - until you absolutely mean what you're saying and are prepared to live with all the consequences and commitments it brings." Brianna removed her fingers and Charisma stared at her momentarily before clearing her throat.

"Are you saying...?"

Brianna held up a hand and Charisma stopped. "Did you know Laura Maxwell called me into her office yesterday?" seeing Charisma's eyes widen in shock. Brianna nodded. "Mmhmm - she told me to stay away from you... said I would be detrimental to your Presidential campaign." Now the blue eyes darkened in anger.

"Oh no she didn't," Charisma growled. Brianna nodded again.

"She did, in fact." Brianna chuckled. "It was almost entertaining, actually. Made me feel like I was in the middle of a badly written soap opera." Charisma snorted. "I told her you were a big girl who had been making decisions on your own for years and you could take care of yourself."

"You're probably the only person to stand up to her in forever."

"Yes, well... she needed a little comeuppance. I was just the one lucky enough to be able to give it to her," Brianna said, making a little face. "Still, I know however misguided her intentions were, she is your friend and councilor... especially in regards to your future ambitions concerning the Presidency. Maybe before we make any decisions here, you should talk to her."

Charisma glared at Brianna, blue eyes almost glowing in her irritation. "Did you not just two minutes ago tell me I could make my own decisions? I will talk to Laura - we already have a meeting scheduled for first thing in the morning to put together a more detailed press release regarding my separation from Kent. But *she* has nothing to do with *us*. *I* want you here... in my life. I want to know if you want that enough to give me one more chance to get it right."

"Charisma....

"Brianna, I can't not try.... not after seeing what Es has gone through these last few days. I don't want to have any more regrets than I already do. I don't want to waste any of the time we have left together."

Brianna scrutinized Charisma for what felt like forever before she nodded once. "I'm willing to try, Charisma, but...."

"Brianna, all I'm asking for is a chance."

"All right," Brianna agreed with a sigh. "But I need to go. I need to get Esmeralda home."

Charisma nodded. "Go. And call me when you get home... please?"

Brianna nodded and put her left hand on the doorknob before turning back and extending her right to Charisma. "It was nice to meet you, Charisma."

"You too, Brianna Brianna," Charisma assured her as she clasped the smaller hand in hers. Then they released one another and Brianna opened the door and was gone. Charisma waited until she heard the car pull away and head down the drive. Then she blew out a nervous breath and braced herself to return to her family in the kitchen.

************

Jas opened the door for Esmeralda when she reached the bottom of the steps. "Thank you, Jasper," she acknowledged in a faint whisper, then slid into the seat. Jas looked at the front door that had closed again as soon as Esmeralda exited, then she climbed into the back to sit beside her for a minute. Esmeralda turned tired, questioning eyes towards her and Jas shrugged.

"Everybody but me got to say their goodbyes inside before they left. I figure I should grab my chance now."

Esmeralda smiled and clutched the fingers resting on Jas' knee. "I'm glad you did."

Jas used the hold Esmeralda had on her hand to pull Esmeralda into her, and they hugged for several minutes. When she finally eased back, she brushed a light kiss over the blonde hair, not quite surprised to see some silver threads woven into it now.

"I'm gonna miss you, Es."

"I'll miss you, Jas. Thank you...." stopping when Jas shook her head.

"We were glad to do it, Es. We volunteered, you know? We weren't going to leave you stranded with just anybody."

Esmeralda smiled. "Well, I was glad it was you guys... despite how screwy the assignment went."

"Speaking of," Jas segued with a frown, jerking her thumb over her shoulder in the direction of the door. "What's going on?" Esmeralda shrugged.

"Best guess? I think Charisma might be finally stepping out of the closet… or at least peeking out of an open door. The real question is if Brianna will be willing to give them the opportunity to be happy together."

Jas shook her head. "I don't know why anyone would choose to be miserable, but even after centuries of working among mortals I have to admit that I still don't understand them."

"I don't think they understand themselves most of the time, Jas - I think that's part of the problem."

"That would certainly explain a lot. Oh," pulling out of her loose embrace with Esmeralda and sliding to the door. "I think the boss is headed this way. Time to play chauffer one more time." Jas opened the door and stepped from the vehicle, then bent down so she could say goodbye. "Love you, Es."

Esmeralda gave her a small smile. "Love you too, Jas." Then Brianna was approaching and looking between the two of them with concern.

"Is everything okay?" Esmeralda nodded.

"I just wanted to offer Es my condolences," Jas spoke before Esmeralda could. Brianna saw Esmeralda's agreement and bobbed her head.

"Thank you, Jas. Let's get Es home, all right?"

"Yes ma'am." Jas closed the door behind her, then climbed in behind the wheel, and they headed away from Charisma's home. Brianna was pensively quiet, and Esmeralda sighed. Despite the fact that her job here was finished, she couldn't stop caring about the two women who had become friends to her. She moved her gaze from the window to Brianna's troubled countenance.

"Brianna?" wincing when her neck popped as she jerked her head around to face Esmeralda. Brianna tilted her head in question. "Are you okay?"

Brianna chuckled wryly. "Pretty sure I should be the one asking you that, Es. I'm... I'm not really sure what I am, actually. Did I understand you correctly when you spoke to Charisma - that you plan to be at work tomorrow?" Esmeralda nodded and Brianna shook her head though she didn't make any comments as to her thoughts on that particular subject. "Ask me again tomorrow. I'll have the chocolate milk chilled and waiting."

"I'd like that," Esmeralda agreed. The two were silent for the rest of the ride home.

************

Charisma steadied herself as she approached the kitchen, easily noting the relative silence throughout the room. When she reached the threshold, she realized that at least part of that was due to the fact that the kids had once more left the building - quite literally from the sounds of it. If she didn't know better, she'd swear they were all running around in her back yard. The adults, however, still sat gathered around the table and all eyes turned her way as she walked into the room. Kent was the first to break the silence.

"Everything okay?"

Charisma looked at him and saw the hopeful twinkle in his eyes and the tremulous smile on his face. She smiled back at him.

"I think so. She's agreed to give me one more chance to see if I can get things right." She felt the release of tension in the room as a palpable thing and chuckled.

"Does this mean she's part of the family again?" Forrest asked hopefully.

"That will be up to her, Orrie. She and I are going to start from the beginning again - try to learn about the people we are now and be friends again. So it may be a little while before she's comfortable being part of the family again... I don't know. Just be ready to welcome her back when she's ready."

"Not a problem," he assured her. "The kids wouldn't stand for anything else anyway." Hunter laughed.

"God that's the truth. That's all we've heard about since she missed Christmas."

"If it makes you feel better," Kay cut in, "She's missed you all terribly. But don't pressure her... please. There are things she has to make peace with too." They nodded their agreement and let their attention turn to figuring out what they were going to do for dinner. Kay approached Charisma, who simply waited for her with a sardonic smirk.

"What's up, Doc?" she asked when Kay was close enough to hear her without Charisma needing to raise her voice. Kay rolled her eyes, but let a smile cross her face even as she examined Charisma's body language. She nodded in satisfaction.

"You've changed," watching a dark brow shoot into an equally dark hairline. "You're more settled... more at peace with yourself - even since yesterday."

"I am. I realized Es was right, and I was a coward to choose misery."

Kay nodded. "I hope it all works out, Charisma. It would be nice to see you both happy."

"You mean that."

"I really do. Just take things slow - I think you'll be fine." Charisma inclined her head, but before she could respond, Kent wrapped an arm around both of them.

"C'mon, ladies. Mama's calling and reserving an entire section of Outback for us. She figured they deserved some warning."

Kay looked down at her funeral garb and frowned. "Are we going like this?"

Kent shook his head. "Everybody's headed upstairs to change. Theresa said she's about your size if you want to borrow something - first door on the right at the top of the stairs. Just meet back here in fifteen minutes." Kay nodded and headed upstairs and Charisma realized she and Kent were the only ones left in the kitchen. He extended his hand, and tugged on hers briefly when she caught his. "C'mon, Charisma. Harley's watching Adam until we can get upstairs to change him." A beat. "I'm pretty proud of you, Charisma," releasing her hand to guide her up the stairs ahead of him. She smiled.

"I'm pretty proud of you too."



Chapter CIV

"Charisma, please... have a seat," Laura Maxwell commanded as soon as Charisma stepped into her office. "That's all, Jess," dismissing her assistant with a negligent wave. Jess nodded and closed the door. Charisma continued on until she was sitting across the desk from Laura. She had the distinct impression this was not going to go well and sighed. It was too damn early in the morning for DRAH-MAH, but better that they get this over with now.

Laura leaned her weight on her hands against the desk as she studied Charisma silently. Charisma didn't squirm or appear uncomfortable - she simply returned Laura's gaze with an arched eyebrow and the slightest hint of a smirk.

Laura sighed - she wasn't looking forward to this, but it needed to be done, so without a word, she took her seat and folded her hands on top of the desk. "It has come to my attention that we have a serious problem that needs addressing." Charisma cocked her head, but didn't speak. "Brianna Walker needs to be removed from your life."

Both eyebrows flew into Charisma's hairline. "Excuse me?" her voice calm, but Laura could see the fury stirring in the back of those blue eyes. She cleared her throat delicately.

"Brianna Walker could easily become an issue in your campaign... especially with your separation from Kent. We need to make sure she stays at the periphery of your life if not completely outside of it."

"No."

"Good. Next order of... wait - what?? What do you mean, no?"

"What part of no is not clear, Laura? I'll be happy to explain either the 'N' or the 'O' to you. I've become quite adept with Adam."

Laura could feel her blood pressure rising, and took a deep breath before saying something she could not possibly take back. Because unlike her meeting with Brianna, she and Charisma were on the same page about a good many things - all she needed to do was remind Charisma of that.

"Charisma, I'm quite serious. Need I remind you of how long and hard we've worked to get to this place? I can spin the separation from Kent - the voters won't be thrilled, mind you, but they'll accept the fact that you have outgrown one another... especially since you've indicated that you'll still be raising Adam together. Spinning your past with Senator Walker won't be that difficult either... as long as she stays in your past, Charisma."

"No."

Laura slapped her hands on the top of the desk and huffed out a breath. Charisma flinched, but held her ground. Laura ground her teeth together before leaning back with a grimace, crossing her arms over her chest and sighing.

"Why are you being so difficult about this? Do you know anything about who this woman is now?"

"I know what I need to know, Laura."

"Oh really? You know she's a lesbian."

"Old news, and not even news worthy to be honest. I don't think the world cares if my best friend is gay," not seeing Laura flinch at her slip of the tongue. "And frankly, if that's all they've got to worry about, then I'm going to be out of a job anyway - we'll be living in Paradise. There are far more important issues to be concerned with."

"And if she's gay for you?"

"That's between her and me."

"Are you really that naïve, Charisma?? It may not be news, but it will certainly derail your campaign... especially if people believe you're gay for her as well."

"If that's all it takes to stop this campaign from moving forward, then it's not really going anywhere to begin with, is it? Laura, I'm not removing Brianna Walker from my life. As long as she's willing to be a part of my life again, and let me be a part of hers, she's staying. End of discussion."

Laura growled. "Why the hell did she have to come back now, anyway? Why couldn't she have just stayed the hell away from you?"

Charisma narrowed her eyes at Laura for a long moment, then rose from her seat. "I think we're done here. If you decide that we actually need to work on an expanded press release about my separation from Kent, let me know and I'll put something together. But stay away from Brianna Walker, Laura. She's off limits to you."

"You're serious."

"As a fucking heart attack," her words causing Laura to cringe noticeably. Charisma walked to the door, stopping when she heard Laura's voice again.

"Did you know she's a writer? Or has ties to the Mob?"

Charisma sighed. "She was a writer in college, Laura. She could have made a living at it if she'd chosen to go that route. As for the Mob... I met her family. She can't help what she was born into, but she can be damned proud of who she became in spite of them."

"She did."

"Excuse me? She did what?"

"Made a career out of being a writer." Charisma turned and met Laura's eyes, which were smug with confidence in her knowledge.

"I beg your pardon."

"You don't have to beg, Charisma - just ask. Or better yet, go ask your supposed best friend why you never knew she's the writer known as Heather Athena Fontana. And when you're ready to get serious about this campaign again, call me."

Charisma didn't respond - she simply left Laura's office and headed for her own.

************

Charisma's day passed quickly enough - there was always something going on and it was enough to keep her busy and her mind off the conversation she'd shared with Laura. So when Esmeralda knocked on the door much later that evening, she was startled to realize just how late it had gotten. She glanced up as Esmeralda stuck her head in the door, then waved her forward.

"Come in, Es," standing and crossing from behind her desk to offer Esmeralda a hug. The embrace was strong but brief, and Charisma leaned back to look into tired green eyes. "Can I interest you in chocolate milk?"

Esmeralda bit her lip. "I'm supposed to have some with Brianna in a little while, but I don't suppose a little more will hurt me, will it?"

"Well, it hasn't messed me up yet," Charisma offered with a smile, "though I think Kent was expecting Adam to come out that color I drank so much of it when I was pregnant."

Esmeralda snickered. "Because, of course, chocolate cows give chocolate milk so chocolate milk drinkers give birth to chocolate colored babies."

"Of course," Charisma agreed drolly as she passed a bottle to Esmeralda and took one for herself. "How are you doing, Es?" sitting next to her on the couch.

Esmeralda released a shuddering breath and slowly shook up her milk. "I'm... I'm taking it one day at a time - sometimes one minute at a time. Sometimes I feel her so close to me that I think...." She sucked down a mouthful of milk and shook her head. Charisma moved closer and put an arm around Esmeralda, smiling sadly when the blonde head came to rest on her shoulder for a moment.

"Have you received her ashes yet?"

"Mr. Prescott delivered them first thing this morning."

"Would you... are you planning to scatter them? Do you need...?" trailing off when Esmeralda shook her head vehemently.

"No... thank you, Charisma. I'm not planning to scatter them. I'm pretty sure the Father is not happy about the fact that I... I had... that I had Saphira cremated, but I couldn't bear to put her in the ground. She was too much of a free spirit to be so confined."

"She really was, wasn't she?" Charisma asked with a smile, chuckling when Esmeralda nodded her head. They stayed that way for another minute before Esmeralda sat up and met Charisma's eyes.

"I supposed I should get to work, and I'm sure you probably have other things you need to be doing as well." She paused. "Thank you, Charisma." Charisma's brow furrowed.

"For what, Es?"

"Being a friend," Esmeralda replied. Charisma brushed a kiss over her forehead and stood, offering her hand to Esmeralda and pulling her up as well.

"You were a friend first, Es. And you were a friend when I needed one the most."

"I'm glad."

"Me too... even when I was angry with you," smiling when Esmeralda's eyes widened. "I was angry because you were right, and because you had the guts to say something to us about it in front of each other."

"And now?"

"Now I'm wishing you had kicked us in the backsides a long time ago - because she gave me that other chance, and I'm determined to try."

"I think you might just succeed," Esmeralda said as she moved back to her cart and began removing her supplies and tools.

"I hope so," Charisma replied softly. "I would like to be happy again, and I would love to be the one that makes her smile for the rest of her life."

Esmeralda's eyes widened, but she kept them on the duster as she moved around the room. "That um... that sounds pretty serious, Charisma."

"Especially from someone who's been living in Narnia for twenty years?"

"Well... yeah - exactly."

"I'm not ready to say the 'L' word yet - either of them. I'm pretty sure that's going to take me a while... just like looking into a career that isn't politics is going to be a slow-moving process for me. But I've had time to regret a number of things in my life, and in the past few months, I've come to accept a few hard truths as well. I don't want to be the cause of her pain anymore, Es."

"If it makes you feel any better, Charisma, I think this is gonna be a good thing for both of you. And of course I'm willing to listen any time you need to talk."

"That goes both ways, my friend," Charisma answered. "Now let me get out of your way. I need to get home and make sure the family hasn't toilet papered the inside of my house," laughing aloud at the expression on Esmeralda's face. "Trust me... they've done it before - it's not pretty."

"I'm not even gonna ask."

"Good choice. OH - before I forget - Mama said to tell you that she expects to see you this week before everyone heads home. They're leaving Sunday afternoon."

"I'll try."

"Hard, Es," Charisma warned with a finger pointed at her. "You don't want to know what will happen if Mama has to come looking for you."

"Probably not," putting the dusting materials away and unwinding the cord on the vacuum. "Go check on your family. And I want pictures if they've redecorated the interior of your home."

Charisma rolled her eyes. "I'll see what I can do." She packed away her laptop and shouldered her briefcase, then gave Esmeralda a wave and left her to her work.

************

Brianna glanced at the clock when a knock sounded on her door, a little surprised. Esmeralda must be ahead of schedule tonight she thought, and called out, "C'mon in, Es." She was therefore more than a little surprised to see a dark head and blue eyes peer around the doorframe.

"I'm not Es - can I come in anyway?"

Brianna chuckled and shook her head at Charisma's playfulness - this, like the phone call they had shared the night before, reminded her so much of why she and Charisma had become friends in the first place. She motioned Charisma in.

"What can I do for you, Charisma?" Brianna asked, the smile lingering on her lips.

"I won't stay but a minute, Brianna, because I know you're waiting to talk to Es. I was just wondering if you'd give me a call when you got home tonight."

"Didn't I do the calling last night? Isn't it your turn to call?" her voice alight with a hint of laughter.

"It would be... if I wasn't going to be home well ahead of you with no idea of when you will be arriving."

Brianna nodded slowly and looked at her watch. "How about you call around eleven-thirty? I'll be home and we should both be winding down by then."

"Fair enough," Charisma agreed. "I want to talk to you about H.A. Fontana."

Brianna winced and scratched the back of her neck. "Oh you've heard about that, have you?"

"Laura was quick to inform me this morning. I'm not mad - except at myself for not catching on to it sooner. She's one of my favorite authors, you know."

"Really?"

"Um hmm - she's always made me feel like part of her stories."

Brianna couldn't stop the smile that crossed her face. ""Mission accomplished then."

Charisma couldn't stop the slight blush that crept up her cheeks and she cleared the throat. "I'll just let you get back to it," she said, motioning around Brianna's office. "Expect the phone to ring at eleven-thirty." Then she was out the door and closing it behind her before Brianna could say a word.

"Well... all righty then," Brianna offered to the empty room, then turned her attention back to the work on her desk.

************

"So how are you doing, Brianna?" Esmeralda asked as she accepted the bottle of chocolate milk Brianna offered. Brianna drank a deep draught of milk, swishing it around in her mouth before swallowing. Then she shrugged.

"I'm trying to decide if I'm an idiot or just a fool," smiling slightly when Esmeralda frowned. "Despite my best intentions - despite myself... despite everything - I agreed to trying again with her... to starting over and seeing what that could be for us. Do I love her so much that I'm willing to do anything to see that she's happy?

"Isn't that part of loving someone, Brianna? Doing what's best for them even if it's not what's best for us?"

"This will break me, Es - if it doesn't work, it will... I'm not sure...." Brianna sighed.

"Do you think it won't?"

"Do you think it will? Es, I don't know what to think anymore. I'm not sure I can trust my judgment because I want this so... so much. I thought I could walk away again... that things would be like they were before and I'd adjust to her not being in my life once more. But I couldn't stay mad and now...."

"Can I tell you something?" waiting for Brianna to nod. "It's okay to be scared, Brianna. You've been on the wrong end of a bad situation for a long time. But I've seen how she looks at you - it's the same way you look at her - the same way Saphira and I looked at one another." She paused to draw a shaky breath and she sipped on her milk so she wouldn't choke when she tried to swallow down a swollen throat. "The fact that she wants to start over from the beginning... to get to know the person you are instead of who she remembers or imagines you to be - that's significant progress. I think it will lead to happiness for both of you if you'll let it."

Brianna smiled. "Always the optimist, Es?"

"It makes my day better than if I focus on the negatives, Brianna. Besides," she added as she glanced around the room until her eyes landed on the crystal frame that was once again displayed prominently on the desk. "I'm pretty sure you're an optimist too."

Brianna chuckled deprecatingly. "Maybe a little. Maybe I just want... a lot."

"It's okay to want, Brianna. And if it helps, I'm wanting for you too."

"I'll take all the good vibes I can get at this point."

"And if you want to talk...."

"That goes both ways, Es. I'm pretty sure I would have gone screaming back home before I even got settled here if not for you and Saphira, so don't hesitate to ask if you need anything, all right? I'd like to think I can be the kind of friend that doesn't forget about their friends no matter what else is happening in my life."

"Thank you, Brianna. You'll never know how much...."

"That's okay - I'm pretty sure you won't either. But I'll always appreciate it. Now c'mon. It's time to get out of here."

"But my work...."

"... will wait until tomorrow. It's not like I'm an exceptionally messy person, and you've done enough for one day. I'm sure it will all be here tomorrow for you to take care of, and if it makes you feel better...." Brianna lifted the shredded trash and dropped it into Esmeralda's cart. "There - all done."

Esmeralda laughed and shook her head. "All right, Senator. I can take a hint. You must have a hot date tonight."

Brianna flushed. "Not quite, but I am looking forward to a phone call," matching Esmeralda's smile with one of her own. "And I'm not leaving you here alone tonight. So let's go... chop, chop."

Esmeralda couldn't argue, so she laughed and put things away, then together they walked out of Brianna's office. Tomorrow would definitely be another day.



Chapter CV

Brianna was comfortably propped up in bed, sipping a cup of hot chocolate and looking over some notes from her editor when the phone rang. She couldn't stop the smile that crossed her face when Charisma's name flashed on the screen. Still she was careful to greet Charisma warmly without giving away a hint of the racing heart she could feel beating in her chest.

"Hello, Charisma."

"Hey, Brianna Brianna. You wouldn't happen to want to help me dispose of the dead bodies that will soon be occupying my house, would you?"

Brianna's brows popped into her hairline, but she couldn't halt the snort of laughter that escaped her throat. "Do I even want to ask?" hearing Charisma shut a door and wondering where she was that she was just closing everyone out.

Charisma sighed. "My brothers - you remember them right? Tall, annoying... law enforcement personnel - yes, well they decided that the family needed a little levity after the funeral and wake yesterday. So they utilized those illegal skills they have acquired as police officers to pick the lock on my office door," moaning slightly when she stretched out on the bed.

"Oh dear," Brianna murmured. "Toilet paper?" she asked sympathetically, remembering when the boys had decorated their apartment like that after having helped them move in senior year.

"If only," Charisma lamented and sighed again. "Silly string."

Brianna laughed even as she groaned aloud at the visual. "They didn't!"

"Oh yes they did. Mama is standing in the doorway with a broom as we speak, directing their clean-up of the mess. I'm pretty sure they're going to have to replace a couple pieces of furniture."

"Yea for Mama," Brianna commented, setting her cup on the bedside table and pushing her editing to the far side of the bed.

"Yes, and speaking of...."

"I'll try," Brianna cut in.

"You don't know what I was going to say."

"Sure I do, Charisma. We may be just starting to learn about one another again, but Mama hasn't changed in twenty-five years... not about some things anyway. You were going to tell me that I need to try to come over again before the family leaves."

"Too damn smart for your own good," Charisma mumbled, smiling when Brianna's chuckle came across the line. "So tell me about H.A. Fontana."

"There's not much to tell, really - I found that giving up writing was harder than I thought it would be. I was... distracted from my day job because of the stories I wanted to tell. And losing you - Fontana was a way for me to remember without it being too personal, because I could make the stories about the characters instead of us. And it fulfilled my need to write."

"So Mac was right then - you should have become a writer."

"Mac was right," Brianna agreed with a smile in her tone. "I wrote and told him about it a long time ago. He was gracious about it - he never said 'I told you so'; he just asked for a first edition of each book and tickets to the premiere when... *if* it goes beyond the book."

"Do you think they will?"

"There's been talk," Brianna admitted. "But talk is all it's been for a while. It doesn't matter right now though. I don't have time for it to be more than it already is."

"Maybe someday?" Charisma's voice a little wistful.

"Maybe."

"And your pen name? That came from our European trip, didn't it?"

"It did indeed - some of my fondest memories are tied up in that name."

"Mine too," Charisma confessed. "Did you talk to Es?" feeling Brianna's hesitation. "I know she's a wonderful confidante, Brianna, and I'm not asking you to spill secrets. I was wondering how you thought she was doing."

Brianna tilted her head thoughtfully even though Charisma couldn't see the action. "I think... you know, I'm not really sure. Part of me wants to believe she's going to get through this despite everything, and another part of me wonders if that's even possible. I've never met two people so in tune with one another before."

"Neither have I. But I didn't get the same sense of despair I felt right after Saphira died. I just wish I knew if that meant she was dealing with her loss or if she's just numb to it all."

"This close in, I'd have to go with the numb theory myself," Brianna stated. "I don't see how she could make peace so quickly," thinking of her own experience with Charisma.

"Good point," Charisma agreed. "Well, we'll try to keep an eye on her. Would you be interested in going to Angel's after work one night this week? Maybe we could get Es to go with us - I don't think she'll ever go back there alone and Matilda's going to want to look after her as well."

"Sure," Brianna agreed. "Wednesday night, maybe? I think that is pot roast night, and Joe does a killer pot roast."

"Sounds good." Charisma yawned. "Your turn to call tomorrow night."

"You betcha," Brianna said with a laugh. "Get to bed, Charisma. Tomorrow is another day."

"Thank you, Scarlett," Charisma replied drolly before she yawned again. "Night, Brianna Brianna."

"Happy dreams, Ri."

************

A storm broke that night and with the falling of the rain, the cold of winter became the chill of spring, and no one was happier to see that change than Esmeralda. It gave her hope that she might one day soon get to see the blooms of home once more. She looked for Saphira in her dreams, hoping she might know when that might be, but Esmeralda drifted into a deeper sleep without ever finding their dell. She wondered when the Father would deem her need for Saphira necessary to fulfill again.

So it wasn't hard to get Esmeralda to agree to go to dinner with them - Brianna called Matilda who in turn called Esmeralda to let her know she was expected. Esmeralda wanted to be mad at the interference from both of them, but she was so lonely with the house empty and everyone gone that she accepted the mandate without argument. And Brianna and Charisma carried on so that she couldn't fault them or Matilda for being so obvious.

The first weekend, both Brianna and Esmeralda spent most of Saturday at Charisma's house at Mama's behest. The children were thrilled to have Brianna among them again, and claimed her almost as soon as she walked in the door. Mama, on the other hand, took possession of Esmeralda and the rest simply followed behind.

That day was renewing for Esmeralda, and if she couldn't find Saphira at all in her dreams, at least she had the love and caring of the human family that had adopted them. And the love and attention they lavished on her that day reminded her that there were still good things in the world to be thankful for. Seeing the looks on their faces knowing that Brianna had returned to them - watching the shy glances stolen between Brianna and Charisma when they thought no one was looking was a bonus; it made her heart glad that there was good coming from the tragedy that had befallen her.

Esmeralda had always looked forward to the evenings she worked - it meant conversation with her colleagues and the Senators she worked for. But now it was her lifeline... practically the only interaction she had with others, and she appreciated it in a way she hadn't when Saphira had been her life. The nights were the hardest because that's when she was alone, and many were the nights that she cried herself to sleep, hoping to find Saphira in her dreams, and always being disappointed when she wasn't to be found.

Still she tried to keep the faith like she had promised - wondering what was behind this whole debacle and hoping the Father had gotten whatever conclusion He had been looking for.

************

In the next few weeks after the Tagherty family returned to their homes, things settled into something of a routine for Charisma and Brianna. At least one of them stayed late every night to talk to Esmeralda, and some nights both of them did. Wednesdays they all went to the diner to share a late meal with Joe and Matilda and Esmeralda always hugged them all before leaving. It wasn't the same as hugging Saphira, but she craved the contact just the same and was thankful beyond measure that each of them was willing to provide her with such comfort.

Brianna and Charisma spoke on the phone every night - sometimes briefly, like Wednesdays when they were together until late. Sometimes they talked for an hour or more, gossiping and giggling about things they had seen or heard during the day. But they took turns calling - it was like their own inside joke - the only person who knew how much they both anticipated this interaction was Esmeralda.

Their days were filled with work, and though they saw one another at some point during the day several times a week, things were no longer forced between them. They had yet to share lunch, but that was due mostly to conflicting schedules than them trying to avoid one another. They were hoping to find time to schedule lunch together before they finished this session, but they had already determined to let it happen instead of making it.

Laura Maxwell seethed over their interaction while Scott Patterson watched with interest. Something had changed between them, and he wanted to know what it was.

************

"So what's the story?" Patterson asked Brianna as he sidled up to her one afternoon on the way to yet another committee meeting. Her eyebrows went into her hairline and she looked at him in confusion.

"I'm sorry - what's the story about what?" shifting the papers she'd been reading until they were clutched against her chest.

"You and Tagherty. There's a weird vibe... not like before, but just...." He let it lie, hoping she would take the hint and answer without him having to elaborate further. Brianna just shrugged.

"I don't know what to tell you, Scott. Charisma and I are friends."

He snorted. "You were friends before, but you could cut the tension with a knife. Since she and her arm candy husband separated, however...." His eyes widened and his jaw dropped and Brianna would have laughed at the picture he made had there not been a ball of dread growing in the pit of her belly. "You two are screwing around together, aren't you?" laughing aloud at the delicious irony of it all. This knowledge - true or not - would make impossibly easy to unseat Charisma from the untouchable golden throne she occupied. His laughter was cut off in conjunction with his stumble as Brianna jerked him by the arm into a quiet corridor. She sent her staffers ahead with a nod of her head, and his followed without hesitation. Patterson chanced to wonder how someone of her stature had managed such a feat, then his attention was taken by her words.

"Mr. Patterson," Brianna's voice low and deadly. "I'm not sure what your issue with Charisma Tagherty is, and I frankly don't care. Charisma and I are friends and that is all you need to know and understand. We have been friends since we were roommates in college. Anything more than that would be sheer speculation on your part and I don't like it when rumors start floating around about me." She gave him a look. "Are we clear?"

"And what's to stop me from...?" he gasped out, only to choke when her hand tightened around his arm painfully and she poked him hard in the chest with her other hand, causing him to wince. He wondered how it was that there was no one in the hallway to witness this assault. At that moment, she released him unexpectedly and went about straightening his tie while he tried to read her fierce expression. Then his attention was taken by her words once more.

"Mr. Patterson, if any kind of speculation or hearsay was to come out about this from you - and believe me... I'll know where the leak comes from - I guarantee you'll never see re-election. I have tried being polite and cordial while I've been here because I don't want to make enemies I don't have time to deal with, but if you want to play hardball, bring it. Just be aware that the gloves will come off and I don't play fair - I do, however, play to win."

He looked at her askance. "Did you just threaten me??"

"Not at all, Scott," picking up the papers she'd let fall when she'd needed to make her point more forcefully. "But if you think I'm going to let you destroy something that Charisma has worked her whole life for because of your petty jealousies and insecurities, let me just remind you of Trevor Carlson," smiling in satisfaction when Patterson's face went ghastly pale.

"How do you...?"

"I told you - all bets are off. So you need to think very carefully about how important your career and your marriage and life as you know it is to you. I will ruin you."

"You're bluffing," straightening his stance until he could look down at her. She smirked at his power play and stepped right into his personal space.

"Wanna bet?" she asked with a smile. Then her phone rang. "Gotta go," she threw over her shoulder as she headed back towards the committee room. "Yes, Indi?" was the last thing Scott Patterson heard before she walked out of hearing. He leaned against the wall for a long moment trying to calm the thrumming of his heartbeat, only to jump in surprise when he felt his phone vibrate against his chest. He grabbed the device from his coat pocket and pushed off the wall to head back towards his office.

"I know I'm late, Murray. Tell them to start without me - something's come up. Take good notes for me." And he pushed the off button and jammed it back into his pocket, missing the days when he could slam a cover closed or a receiver into its cradle. It would have been a much more satisfying way to relieve some of the stress he suddenly felt.

************

"You're quite the celebrity," Esmeralda commented with a small smirk when she entered Brianna's office much later that evening. "I don't know what the Senators have heard, but the lower echelon is buzzing about you putting Senator Patterson in his place."

Brianna scrubbed a hand over her face and sighed. "What're they saying?" watching as Esmeralda started her cleaning routine around the office.

"Just that it was about time someone gave him his due - he's not particularly well-liked by the lower levels because of his superior attitude. Most of them are dying to know what you said to him to make him cower."

Brianna frowned. "If they don't know what was said, how do they know what happened?"

Esmeralda turned and met Brianna's eyes. "His staff and yours were both aware of the altercation that took place in the hallway this afternoon; and apparently he missed the rest of his day sitting in his office brooding. Talk is that you um... handed him his ass... is the quote I got the most."

"I told him to mind his business." Brianna swiveled to face the crystal frame, staring at the picture she had replaced the original with. It was Charisma's shot of the two of them in front of Trevi Fountain and the feelings she'd felt that night shot through her again. "Do you think I'm crazy, Es? Trying to protect her from rumors and speculation? We've only been working at being friends again for a few weeks... a couple months at most and people are already talking."

"Let them talk," Charisma instructed from the doorway, startling Brianna and Esmeralda from their conversation. Charisma pushed off from the doorjamb and sauntered into the room. Esmeralda continued working but moved to the periphery so she was only an observer. Brianna leaned back in her chair and studied Charisma as she leaned against the desk facing her.

"Charisma...."

"Brianna," Charisma replied, crossing her ankles and leaning back on her arms. "I knew when I asked for this chance with you that there was every likelihood that people would start talking about us sooner or later. They did in school for a little while too, remember? Eventually no one even thought twice about it and just assumed we came as a matched set. We're friends, and even if... *when* that changes to something more... we're not doing anything wrong, are we?"

"No... no - of course not," reaching out a hand and twining their fingers together when Charisma extended her own. "I just don't want you to resent me when... *if*… your career falls apart over this. And it's hard for me to believe that you'd be willing to give up everything you've worked for...."

"...after living in denial for twenty-some odd years?" Charisma asked with a sad smile, closing her eyes when Brianna nodded her head as tears sparkled in her eyes. "I considered this possibility, Brianna, and even though it took me twenty years to get here, I'm willing to take the risk because I want...." She paused and glanced at Esmeralda who had continued to clean. "Es?" watching the blonde head pop up and green eyes focus on her. "Do you remember when you first came back to work after your illness - right before Brianna came to town?"

"Of course, Senator. It was right before I met Adam for the first time."

"Do you remember asking me when I'd been happy last?" waiting for Esmeralda's head to nod. "What did I tell you?" Esmeralda scrunched up her face in thought before she started speaking.

"I think it was after my college graduation. I took a trip to Europe with the very best friend I had in the world," quoting Charisma word for word. Charisma nodded her agreement.

"I haven't been truly happy in such a long time, Bri. Every decision I've made since I was five has been for the advancement of my career, and for a while that was enough. But when you left - when I let you go - the most I ever found in my life was contentment. Nothing made me genuinely happy. I want to be happy again. Please don't let this give you cold feet."

"I just want you to be sure, Charisma."

"Oh Sweetheart," loosening their fingers so she could cup Brianna's face in her own. "I've had twenty years to make sure. And a family that will ensure neither of us ever doubt again."

Brianna covered the hands caressing her cheeks with her own, pulling them away so she could hold them. "Yea for the Taghertys!" Brianna replied. "I only want what's best for you, Ri."

"How lucky I'm holding it in the palm of my hands," Charisma said as she squeezed the hands she was clasping. Their eyes met and they started laughing, relieving the tension that had come from their conversation. "That was incredibly cheesy, wasn't it?" Charisma snorted through her giggles.

"Yes!" Esmeralda complained before Brianna could say a word. "Thank you for letting me be witness to that. It made me happy."

"Good!" Charisma responded emphatically. "Since it was your kick or six in the butt that got us to this place, it seems only fair that you got to see the denouement." Esmeralda shook her head and Charisma and Brianna exchanged worried glances. "No?"

"No, Charisma - this wasn't a denouement, because it's not the end of anything. This is a new beginning."



Chapter CVI

Esmeralda was right of course, when she told Charisma and Brianna that their conversation that day was a new beginning for them, though there was nothing overt about it. They were still old friends who had lost touch with one another, then been reconnected by a strange twist of fate. From the outside, no one could see the difference in their relationship - mostly because it didn't change publicly. It couldn't... not for a while yet. Brianna refused to do anything that would make her a home wrecker, and while Kent and Charisma were separated, they were still legally married. So while things did become a little more intimate between them privately, they were still slowly working their way towards rebuilding a strong foundation they would eventually be able to expound upon.

Their phone conversations became less gossip sessions about the people around them and more about who they were and where they had been in life and what they thought and felt about a vast array of subjects. That isn't to say they didn't gossip - though both of them would have denied the accusation to their graves. And they did still talk about family - Kent and Esmeralda and Kay and ALL the Taghertys, but that was to share things of interest the other may not have been privy to for whatever reason.

They did continue their Wednesday night dates with Esmeralda - for her sake as well as theirs. She needed the interaction and since Matilda had insisted she keep in touch, this was the best way to accomplish that for everyone involved. And since Brianna and Charisma were adjusting to being together again - even as simply friends - having Esmeralda as a buffer made it easier to just be.

Esmeralda, for her part, was happy to be included. She was never made to feel like a third wheel or an add-on, but felt more like a member of the family. She was able to watch their friendship slowly strengthen and blossom, and it gladdened her heart just a little... which given her circumstances was more than she expected to feel ever again.

For whatever reason, none of her angelic teammates had been back to visit... not even Amber. Esmeralda had begun to wonder if they had been forbidden to return to her or if they had been immediately reassigned to another case or if she had simply been wiped from existence as far as they were concerned. Saphira remained elusive in her dreams and it was wearing on Esmeralda in a way she couldn't explain to anyone. She didn't need to, however. Everyone could see that despite their best efforts, Esmeralda was slowly wasting away in front of them.

Charisma and Brianna tried to include her in more of their lives, but other than their Wednesday evening meals together, Esmeralda adamantly refused, citing their need to learn how to be a couple together. After spending nearly two hours on the phone discussing their options, they decided to call in reinforcements.

So Charisma placed a call to Mama and Brianna rang up Kay. And after just a few minutes of explaining their dilemma, Kay and Mama agreed to come in for the weekend to see if they could help.

************

Since Esmeralda wouldn't come to them, the four women decided to go to her instead. Kent was in from the City to spend some time with Adam, which Charisma believed was fortuitous timing.

She met him at the door, and led him immediately to her study where Brianna, Mama and Kay were currently ensconced with Adam. Kent looked surprised, but hid it fairly well, barely getting out his greetings before being mauled by his son.

"PA!" jumping into Kent's arms for a hug and giving his father a sloppy kiss. Kent returned the embrace fervently and laughed aloud at Adam's exuberance.

"Hey, Boy! You ready to have some fun with your old man?"

Adam frowned and shook his head. "No, Pa. Go fix Es." Kent turned and looked at Charisma.

"What's wrong with Es?"

"She's not doing well," Charisma replied, unwilling to elaborate more in front of Adam, but Kent was quick on the uptake and he nodded his understanding. "We thought we'd go visit her this morning while you and Adam were out having fun. Then maybe you could stop by to say hello."

"I think we could do that. Whaddya say, Adam?"

"Go fix Es?"

"Well, Mama and Gramma and Brianna and Kay are going to go see if they can make Es feel better first. Then in a little while, you and me can stop by to cheer her up. Sound good?"

"We bring ice cream?"

The women listening to the conversation chortled softly, but Kent nodded seriously. "I think that's a good idea, Son. Ice cream will help cheer Es up."

"'Kay! We go now," Adam replied imperiously, pointing towards the door.

"Well, how about we go see the airplanes and rocket ships for a little while? Then we'll go pick up some ice cream before we go to Es' house."

"Yes! Bye Mama!" he called out, waving as he urged his father forward. Now Kent laughed and turned towards Charisma.

"Give Mama a kiss, Son," Kent instructed, holding onto Adam's bottom half while he leaned into Charisma's embrace and kissed her. "Call me if you need anything," Kent offered to Charisma in a whisper. She nodded her thanks and walked them to the door. She waited until they were out of sight before closing the portal, then went back to her study to collect the rest so they could head out to Esmeralda's.

************

Esmeralda was surprised to see them on her porch when she opened the door at their knock, but her good manners held and she invited them inside. The place was spotless and smelled of cleaning fluid and each of them wondered if she did anything besides clean when she was home. Before she could lead them to the living room, Brianna headed for the kitchen, putting the bag she carried on the table and smiling when the others followed suit. Esmeralda stood in the doorway and watched bemusedly as they started unloading the groceries they'd brought with them.

"Is this an intervention of some kind?" she asked with a hint of sad humor in her voice.

"You could call it that," Charisma replied softly. "We're worried about you, Es. You're dying in front of us, and that's not acceptable! And we're going to do whatever it takes to change that."

Esmeralda could hear the tears Charisma was biting back and she crossed the room and placed a hand on Charisma's arm. Charisma's motion stilled at the touch and the rest of the room halted their work in deference to that lack of movement. Esmeralda smiled sadly at Charisma and shook her head.

"There's nothing you can do, Charisma. Without Saphira...." She shook her head.

"C'mon, Es," Brianna begged softly. "You have to want to live... you have to try. Don't you want to see Adam grow up? Don't you want to know how our story turns out?" reaching out a hand to Charisma who took it without hesitation. "After all, you're at least partially responsible for us getting this far."

"Adam is going to become a wonderful man - he is such a precious child, and with so many brilliant adult role models, I have great faith in his future. As for you two, I have to believe that in choosing happiness, you have finally discovered that your true path in life lies in being together no matter where it takes you. The only thing I'm responsible for is calling it like I see it - you two are responsible for the rest."

"Es, is there anything we can do?" Kay asked, confident of the answer, but wanting to hear Esmeralda's explanation. It might help the others to accept the truth of what Kay knew to be true.

"I don't think so, Kay. It's not that I want to die - I just don't want to live very much. There's nothing left for me here." Esmeralda held up a hand before the protestations could start and they respected her unspoken request to remain silent. She took several deep breaths before expelling a sigh and resumed speaking. "It's not that I don't love all of you or appreciate your places in my life. I will never be able to convey what you mean to me. But Saphira and I were always a part of one another... from the very beginning. I felt what she did; she knew my pain and my happiness. We started together and we were supposed to be together forever - we were promised forever. And yet, I haven't seen her... haven't felt her near since the night before her funeral service. I thought she was going to watch over me...." Esmeralda shook her head. "It doesn't really matter what I thought. The fact is that when she died, so did I. It's just taking my body longer to catch up to that truth."

"Bullshit!!" Charisma and Brianna exploded together, drawing startled looks from two of the other women in the room. Esmeralda didn't flinch - she merely held their gaze with her own sad one. "You're choosing this, Es. You're choosing to die!" Brianna accused.

"No... I'm really not. If I was choosing death, it would already be over. And I promised Amber I would do everything in my power to not put her through this again. But my heart is broken, and the only thing... the only person... that could have fixed it is no longer around to do so... not even in my dreams."

"So you're dying from a broken heart?" Okasa queried.

"Essentially, yes," Esmeralda replied. "I felt it fracture before I got the news of Saphira's death. And when I said goodbye to her in the hospital...." She looked at the ceiling and blinked back her tears. "I felt it stop beating." Charisma and Brianna snorted.

"I don't believe that," Charisma scoffed. "I don't think it's possible."

"It *is* possible," Kay confirmed, drawing a glare from Charisma that she ignored, choosing to focus on Esmeralda instead. "It's rare, but it's completely conceivable - especially between partners who are mated and have spent a lifetime together. Can we help make it easier, Es?" taking Esmeralda's hands in her own and clasping them gently.

"I don't think so," Esmeralda returned quietly. "I'm just taking things one day at a time." She turned to look at Charisma and Brianna who were clutching one another's hands, knowing that their anger was due in large part to the guilt and helplessness they felt. Kay released her hands, and Esmeralda cupped each of their faces with one hand, forcing them to raise their eyes to meet hers. "Please don't," she pled softly. "Please don't feel guilt over this and please don't refuse to be happy now. The only thing that has given me any real joy since Saphira's death is knowing that the two of you have finally found happiness together. Please don't take that away from me."

Charisma covered the hand covering her cheek, and smiled through her tears. "You don't play very fair at all," she grumbled. Esmeralda laughed.

"Of course not. I live in a political town - I play to win," causing the other four women to snicker.

Brianna took Esmeralda's hand from her face and enfolded it between hers. "We don't want you to go, Es. What'll we do without you?"

"The same thing you've always done, Brianna - live. I promise to stay with you as long as I can, and I'll be watching over you once I'm gone."

"Like a Guardian Angel," Charisma whispered, fingers touching the pin she wore every day that Esmeralda had given her those many months ago.

Esmeralda nodded. "Exactly like a Guardian Angel. Now how about we make some lunch?"

"Good idea - especially since Kent and Adam will be by with ice cream soon." And with that, they stood and began preparing the food that had been brought.

************

"Es?" Brianna asked as they cleaned up the kitchen sometime later. "What happened to Amber and Ruby? I expected them to stick around for a while... especially Ruby since she came here to help you out to begin with."

"They both had other responsibilities, and Ruby being here was creating a hardship for other members of the family, I think. I couldn't justify asking either of them to stay when they had so many other obligations they were accountable for."

"That kinda sucks," Kay commented as she dried a pan and passed it to Esmeralda to put away.

Esmeralda shrugged. "Life does sometimes. We just have to appreciate the good when it happens."

Okasa put a hand on Esmeralda's arm. "Is there any way I can convince you to stop working and come stay with us for whatever time you have left?"

Tears welled in Esmeralda's eyes, but she refused to allow them to fall. "Oh, Okasa... you have no idea how tempting that sounds, but I can't. I still have medical bills and funeral debts that have to be taken care of. I can't leave that for Amber to worry about. It's going to be hard enough for her to deal with my death."

Kay tilted her head curiously and Esmeralda proffered her full attention. "If your dying will bother her so much, why isn't she here spending time with you while you're still alive?"

Esmeralda studied Kay's expression, finding nothing but compassion and curiosity in her gaze. "I don't think she can be. For one thing, she's still trying to deal with Saphira's death - she was less prepared for that possibility than I was. For another, I don't think the Father will allow it."

"I don't understand."

"Saphira and I were banished from our home - disowned, if you will. She basically had to demand the right to attend Saphira's service with me. I think the Father has refused her permission to return."

"And she's incapable of defying Him?"

Esmeralda chuckled unexpectedly, and the sound drew smiles from everyone. "Oh no - she's quite capable of defiance. She could be a professional. I asked her not to. I won't be the cause of her being banished as well, and I'd prefer she stay in His good graces... just in case I need her."

"And I thought *my* family was screwed up," Brianna mumbled, causing the rest to laugh. Before Esmeralda could question, a knock sounded at the door, and she excused herself to answer it. Then Adam had thrown himself into her arms and Kent had entered behind him carrying yet another grocery bag. Esmeralda just squeezed Adam for all she was worth and shook her head at the amount of food that was suddenly occupying space in her house. Then she led the way to the kitchen so she could share ice cream with people she was proud to call family.

************

"Mama?" Adam asked hours later when Charisma was tucking him into bed. She cocked an eyebrow at him and he giggled and traced it with his finger. Then he frowned seriously and tipped his head to one side. "Es all better now?"

Charisma bit her lip and closed her eyes briefly. "I think we made Es happy today, but I don't think she's going to get better, Sweetie. She misses Saphira too much."

Adam threw his arms around her neck. "Love Es, Mama."

"I know, Son - we all love Es. But part of Es is missing with Saphira gone, and she needs that part to be all better again. None of us can fix that."

Adam considered her words carefully, then nodded and hugged her again. "Love Mama."

Charisma smiled and returned his embrace. "I love you too, Adam... so much. Sleep now with happy dreams, okay?" feeling him nod against her chest. She laid him down on his pillow and pulled the covers up over his shoulders. He yawned once and closed his eyes, nodding off before Charisma could rise from the bed. Then she made her way back downstairs where everyone else was assembled.

"He asleep already?" Kent asked. He hadn't put their son to bed because Adam had specifically requested Charisma, and though he was a little hurt by it, Kent understood that some things a boy sometimes needed his mama for. Charisma nodded and made a beeline for Brianna, curling up on the couch next to her and taking her hand without conscious thought.

"Yes. He wanted to know if Es was all better," feeling the wince that went around the room.

"I wish there was more we could do for her," Brianna said. Kay shook her head.

"The most important thing any of us can do is to share our happiness with her... especially the two of you," watching Brianna and Charisma blush and exchanging smirks with Okasa and Kent. "I know you're taking things remarkably slow, but I think knowing she played even a small role in seeing you happy together has eased her pain somewhat. Be thankful you could do that much."

The room fell silent and Charisma allowed her thumb to absently trace over the soft skin on Brianna's knuckles. Kent chuckled and rose from his chair, walking behind them and dropping a hand onto each of their shoulders. They jumped but didn't shift from their positions. Kent leaned forward until his head was on a level with theirs and took their joined hands in both of his.

"I just want to say I'm glad to see this," squeezing the clasp lightly. "I know it's only been a few months, but really, it's been a couple decades. So if you're going slow because of my feelings, please don't. I know I made the right decision. However, if you're going slow for each other, I suppose that's all right then. Just be happy, okay?"

Brianna and Charisma swapped startled glances, wondering about everyone's seemingly sudden need to ensure they were happy. Then they realized it could be much worse and decided to take whatever small blessings they could find - especially since they had be given almost unwavering support from those that meant the most to both of them. Mischief sparkled in their eyes briefly, then they both leaned forward to brush a kiss on either side of Kent's face, smiling greatly at the blush that followed their actions.

"Thank you, Kent," Charisma said sincerely as she met his eyes. He nodded and cleared his throat.

"You betcha," he replied with a smile. "Just remember you owe me an invitation to the wedding when it happens," he added as he dropped their hands and stood. "Gotta go - I'll be back tomorrow," and without another word, he saw himself out, not bothering to look back at the two flushed faces still sitting stunned at his parting words. Kay and Okasa looked at one another then immediately away in an effort to keep their laughter in check. After another moment, Okasa cleared her throat, forcing Brianna and Charisma to glance up at her. She noted they avoided each other's eyes though their hands had tightened convulsively around one another's. Kay spoke before Okasa could.

"Lighten up, you two. We all know it's going to happen eventually - but it's totally up to you when it happens though and how public it becomes."

Blue and green eyes flew to Kay's face, observing the smirk she wore. They couldn't help but chuckle at her words and demeanor, and with that, they relaxed. Okasa snorted.

"Now that we've got that settled, I need to know what you want to do about your trip to Europe in a couple months." Startled eyes jumped back to hers and she cocked an eyebrow. "Did you forget you asked me to take care of arranging that twenty years ago?"

"I didn't think...."
"I didn't expect...."

"Everything was taken care of years ago - except the flight. I decided to hold off on that in case you were both successful enough to travel first class this time." Her words garnered smiles all around and Okasa shrugged. It was the truth, if not the entire truth. "So you two need to talk and decide what you want to do."

Finally Brianna and Charisma looked at one another, holding their gazes for a long time before turning back to Okasa. "Yes, Mama," they replied in unison, knowing they would talk about it when they were alone. Okasa nodded.

"I'm going to go say goodnight to my grandson and then go to bed. It's been a long day."

Her words were like a catalyst, and everyone rose from their places and exchanged hugs, then watched Okasa head upstairs. Brianna turned back to Charisma. Charisma just covered her lips with a finger and shook her head; Brianna leaned her forehead against Charisma's and neither of them noticed when Kay slipped from the room to wait in the hall.

"Call me when you get home?"

"Of course," Brianna assured her, kissing the finger still resting lightly on her lips. Charisma shivered and closed her eyes. "Goodnight, Ri."

"Goodnight, Brianna Brianna."



Chapter CVII

When Esmeralda closed the door behind her guests, she did so with a melancholy smile on her face. It was the second time the four women had visited her as a group, and she appreciated their efforts on her behalf. Despite the fact that the growth in Brianna's and Charisma's relationship was exceptionally slow, it was good to see they *were* making progress at last... even if it only meant they had just reached the public handholding stage. At least it was something she could recognize as genuine headway. Still, it wasn't enough to alleviate her own sense of loss. What she had said to Kay at their first visit had been the absolute truth - it wasn't that she wanted to die... it was simply that she had no will to live. And the happiness and love they had brought into her life that day couldn't begin to touch the loneliness and despair that was the gaping maw where her heart and soul had once resided - a cavity that only grew a little greater every single day she was apart from Saphira.

She glanced at the calendar, noting with a hint of surprise that this second 'intervention visit' had been four months to the day since Saphira's passing. Esmeralda felt her hands start to shake as she raised them to cover her mouth. A few slow, deep breaths and the tears were pushed hack behind her eyelids again. In some ways it had been forever, and in others it felt like it had only just happened.

She locked up the house tightly, and crossed into their bedroom... her bedroom now, she supposed idly - closing the door and moving straight to the bathroom.

Even though spring had sprung and summer was literally roaring in with both barrels, Esmeralda never felt warm anymore. And the cooler air in the evenings tended to give her a genuine chill that made her shake down to her bones.

She ran the water as hot as she could stand it, sighing in relief when she stepped under the spray. Esmeralda stood there for long moments, letting the warmth flow over and around her until she felt the shivers subside. Then she bathed as quickly as she could, drying off and dressing in the overheated little room before stepping back into the cooler bedroom….

... only to stop short when she realized she was no longer alone in the house.

"Hello, Es," Amber offered as she folded her wings neatly behind her until only the feathered arches peeked over her shoulders. She opened her arms, stunned when Esmeralda didn't immediately move into her embrace. "Es?"

"Hello, Amber," Esmeralda replied coolly, clenching her jaw to keep the tears at bay once more.

"Es? Aren't you glad to see me?"

"Of course I am, Amber. I'm just not sure you're real. Unlike my earthly family that has kept in touch with me almost daily since Saphira's death, it feels as though my heavenly family deserted me for the last four months. I'm not convinced you're more than a figment of my rather vivid imagination." Her voice wasn't accusatory - it was resigned.

"Oh Es - this is the first time I've been able to get away. I badgered Michael until he secured permission for me to come." She sighed and her wings drooped behind her. "I've been trying to do like you asked," Amber said in a near-whisper. "I've been trying to stay out of trouble so I could be here when you truly needed me to be."

"And I need you now more than I have since Saphira died?" her voice a mixture of hurt and confusion.

Amber shrugged. "I dunno. I just know the minute I got the go-ahead from Michael, I came. We've missed you, Es. Everyone has been trying get back here - Turq managed to wind up on probation from her efforts."

"Should I ask?" Esmeralda asked with a chuckle, despite the tears in her eyes.

Amber blushed. "Probably not. I'm pretty sure it's going to be a while before Heaven recovers."

The tears spilled down her cheeks and Esmeralda covered her mouth. "Oh Amber...." waiting until Amber looked up before she leaped into her arms. Amber braced herself for the impact, then hugged Esmeralda as tightly as she dared. With her enhanced senses, she could easily feel the frailty in the human form she held, and Amber felt the tears roll down her face.

"You promised me, Es - you promised me."

Esmeralda gathered her courage and took a deep breath. Then she leaned back so she could meet Amber's eyes... the gold dimmed to a washed-out brown. Esmeralda leaned forward just enough to brush her lips over Amber's forehead.

"I've been trying too, Amber. But my heart - it's broken and I just don't know how to fix it. I don't know how to make it better. I miss her, Amber - I miss her so much."

Now it was Amber's turn to lean forward, and she did so until their foreheads were touching - keeping her arms wrapped snugly around Esmeralda. "I was afraid of this," she whispered. "I told Michael...." Amber broke off and pulled away just slightly. "It doesn't matter - I didn't want to be right about this."

"If it makes you feel better - I didn't want you to be right either. I just... I can feel myself slipping away, Amber. And I don't know how to stop it - I'm not sure I really want to." Esmeralda sighed and left Amber's clasp, shivering as soon as Amber's warmth was gone. Without a word, Amber tugged Esmeralda to the bed and tucked her in, then went around to the other side and clambered under the covers to share her warmth once more, wincing only slightly at the discomfort she felt when her wings contorted slightly to accommodate her position. Esmeralda sighed contentedly and Amber smiled. It wasn't much, but given the rest, she was happy for small blessings.

There was silence for a time, then Esmeralda shifted until she could look up at Amber's face. Amber felt the movement and glanced down. "Es?"

"Amber, has anyone... has anyone located Saphira?"

Amber sighed and shook her head. "No. And that alone makes me curious. The last time someone couldn't be found, it was Moses, and He hid Moses because He willed it so. I'm beginning to wonder if something similar happened to Saphira. The only thing I don't understand is why He would feel the need to keep her away from us."

"Do you think He's afraid it would become another rebellion like Lucifer led?"

Amber shrugged. "I dunno. It's just peculiar, and you know how that grates on me."

"I know," Esmeralda offered through a yawn. "Sorry."

"Why?" Amber inquired affectionately. "I know how much sleep humans need, and it's probably worse for you with everything that's going on. Sleep. I'll stay and watch over you for as long as I can."

Esmeralda yawned again and snuggled deeper into Amber's hold. "Love you, Amber."

"Love you too, Es."

************

"Wake up, Es," the voice prodded gently, causing a frown to mar Esmeralda's otherwise angelic features. "C'mon, Sweetheart - wake up and let me see those beautiful eyes." Esmeralda blinked, but scrunched her eyes closed when the bright light nearly blinded her. It had just been coming on to dark when she'd lain down with Amber. Had she really been asleep that long? Then she took a deep breath and stiffened, even as she felt darkness fall around her. The warmth and scent of Saphira surrounded her and the low, husky voice was her undoing. "Es?"

"Phira?" shivering when strong arms tightened around her. She turned in Saphira's arms and tucked her head beneath her chin, greedily inhaling the smell that encompassed her. "Oh God, Love - how I have missed you so!" Then she cuddled into Saphira's embrace and just cried.

"I've been here, Sweetheart - just waiting for you," Saphira whispered.

Saphira just held Esmeralda and let her cry, praying that the sobs wracking her body would give her the relief she sought. Saphira could feel Esmeralda's pain, and it was nauseating. Tears escaped blue eyes while Esmeralda cried and Saphira let them fall unchecked as she rocked her mate.

After an incalculable span of time, Esmeralda calmed and though Saphira refused to release her hold, she did ease back just enough to determine if Esmeralda had in fact fallen asleep. What she found was a pair of green eyes swirling with pain and anger and love and devotion staring back at her. She brushed a kiss over Esmeralda's forehead, only a little surprised when Esmeralda pulled her head down until their lips met.

The kiss wasn't angry or passionate, but full of love and reassurance and they let it linger for long minutes. Finally, though, Esmeralda pulled back, sitting up and pushing Saphira over until she was laying flat on her back. Esmeralda leaned over her, studying her blue eyes and resisting the touch that was urging her to meld their bodies together and just forget everything for a while. She shook her head and Saphira blew out a frustrated breath, but relented.

"What is it, Es?" she finally asked, breaking the uncomfortable silence that had fallen. Esmeralda bit her lip, and let the anger that had been stirring fade into the background as her sadness moved to the forefront of her countenance.

"Why did you lie to me, Saphira?" seeing the shock widened blue eyes as the accusation rang in her ears. "Why did you tell me you didn't choose this? Don't," she commanded softly when Saphira looked like she was going to erupt. "You told me you had taken care of everything - that implies you made a choice to ensure I would be all right. You told me you were no longer being punished for your actions - that means you were reinstated and moved home while I was left on Earth to suffer alone without you." She took a breath and allowed resignation to underscore her tone. "What I don't understand is why - why the charade? Why rip my soul apart making me believe you were dead? Why, Saphira? What did I do that was so horrible that you couldn't be with me anymore?" Saphira wrapped her arms tighter around Esmeralda's body, forcing them together while holding on for dear life. "Saphira... I can't breathe," Esmeralda gasped. Saphira loosened her hold without giving Esmeralda an opportunity to move away.

"I didn't lie, Es. I didn't choose this - not to die or to be separated from you. Es, you weren't getting better... you were still dying. I was desperate to make sure that wasn't gonna happen; all I wanted to do was make sure you were gonna be okay. I didn't know this would be a consequence of my actions."

"Maybe not at first, but you knew afterwards - when I met you here right after...." She shuddered and shook her head, trying to clear it of the myriad of thoughts and feelings that rippled through her. She couldn't stop the memory, however. It was still too fresh and Esmeralda let it roll to its conclusion before she met the guilt in Saphira's eyes. This time when she tried to pull away, Saphira let her go... but only far enough that she could look Esmeralda squarely in the eye.

"I didn't lie, Es," said through gritted teeth. "I have *never* lied to you." Saphira raked a hand through her hair almost viciously, welcoming the pain as a distraction from the agony she could feel tearing them apart. "When I talked to the Father - when I accepted responsibility for the mistake that got us both tossed from home, it was with the understanding that He would make you well again. I couldn't... I can't live without you, Es and watching you continue to suffer for my actions...." Saphira shook her head. "I expected it meant that He'd heal you and eventually we'd get to go home again when your mission was complete, but I never thought it would mean I had to die first... certainly not leave you behind." She bit her lip, but a single tear still rolled down one cheek, and she wiped it away savagely. "When He brought us together here, I was given strict instructions on what I was and was not allowed to reveal to you. I still don't know why - He hasn't seen fit to share much with me since my return," the last stated with more than a hint of bitterness.

"So you're alive? And you're home?"

"Not exactly," Saphira replied with a huff. "I did die - the human me did anyway. When that happened, the Angel part of me was brought here... wherever *here* is. I am waiting for you to join me before I can be truly alive again. Until we're together, I am simply existing... marking time."

"Then who were the others you talked to - to know that Brianna's and Charisma's case was so well known? Amber said no one knows where you are... and you know she's asked around."

"She probably hasn't asked the cherubs though. You know how crazy they make her just on general principle… and then you add in their dangerous target practice and all, it's not surprising she hasn't found me. They're the only ones who stop by occasionally - I think He sends them periodically to check on me because no one else has been by which indicates He doesn't want me found yet." Saphira shrugged. "And they always tend to show up when I least expect them to."

"So you're a prisoner here?" Esmeralda's voice almost screeching.

"More like a tenured guest. It was indicated to me that this is only temporary, and though I don't have any outside contact with anyone other than the sporadic cherub visit, I can still watch over you from here. That's enough for me. He promised we would be together again - I have to trust that. And until then, I get to watch over you."

Saphira reached for Esmeralda again, gratified when Esmeralda fell into her arms. THIS had been the reaction Saphira had been waiting for and the joy she felt resonated through her soul and into Esmeralda who shuddered beneath her touch.

"Oh Saphira," Esmeralda whispered, clinging to her mate's warm body and committing her faith to Saphira's strength to keep them upright. "I'm sorry...."

"No," Saphira replied fiercely. "No - I should have told you that I talked to Him. We could have talked about what it meant to both of us - maybe made a few contingency plans."

"I should have given you a chance to explain before I accused, but I was so angry when I thought about it."

"I guess we both could have done things a little bit differently, but Es, I don't blame you for being angry with me. Truth is - I was pretty furious at myself when I realized what had happened, but by then it was too late."

"I love you, Phira... so much."

"I love you too, Es," Saphira reassured her with a smile. "And nothing about that is ever gonna change... except that I'll love you more every day."

Esmeralda blushed, but couldn't stop the sly smile that crossed her face. "That was pretty corny, Phira. I think you were human too long."

"Without a doubt, Es," Saphira agreed with a snort. "But that doesn't negate the truth of the sentiment and the feelings behind it."

"Show me, Phira," Esmeralda growled aggressively. "I want to feel it - I want to feel you."

Saphira didn't need any other enticement and Esmeralda followed her to the ground. Then there was no more talking - only feeling.

************

"If you have been here this whole time," Esmeralda contemplated aloud sometime later, "why couldn't I find you? I've searched every night since you...." Saphira held her tighter and Esmeralda snuggled into her embrace.

"I dunno, Es," Saphira answered. "I'm sure He had a reason."

"Of course I did," a deep voice replied, and Saphira automatically shifted them so she could cover their modesty with her wings. He allowed them to settle before He stepped into view and both Angels lowered their eyes in respect. The Father took a seat beside them, in their periphery but without making them feel as if He was scrutinizing them. "It's good to see you again, Esmeralda." Esmeralda bit back the retort she wanted to make and simply nodded her acceptance of His words. He chuckled lightly. "I know you're angry, Es. I'd be worried if you weren't. I'm sorry you had to go through this, but I needed to know you were ready - both of you."

When He didn't elaborate further, Saphira blew out an impatient breath, but her tone was the epitome of patience when she spoke. "Ready for what?"

"The one request both of you have made of Me - aside from the welfare of the other." Esmeralda and Saphira looked at one another, their expressions a conundrum of confusion. Finally, they both looked back and Him. He smiled. "I think it's time for you to come home, Es. It's time you both resume your rightful place in the hierarchy." He offered with a smile. Esmeralda's eyes widened.

"What about Brianna and Charisma, Father?"

He nodded, not at all surprised by Esmeralda's compassionate nature. "You did well with them, Es. They're on their way to happiness together. But it's up to them now. They have to be willing to take the steps to claim it. If they do...." He shrugged. "I have high hopes for them."

Esmeralda sighed and Saphira hugged her tighter. "You did good, Sweetheart. I'm so proud of you."

The Father laughed, the sound a rumbling thunder in the quiet of the meadow. "I'm proud of both of you. You far surpassed my greatest expectations and you'll be well-rewarded for it."

"I'd be happy just to come home again," Esmeralda murmured. "I'm so tired."

"I know you are, Es," the Father said benevolently. "Close your eyes," noting that Saphira did the same even though He hadn't instructed her to do so. "Close your eyes and relax, Es. When you open them again, you'll be home. Your health will be restored and you will be among my Chosen again."

"And Saphira?"

"Saphira's been waiting for you, Esmeralda. When you return, so will she." With that assurance, Esmeralda closed her eyes and waited for the world to shift around her.

************

"NO!! No, Es! C'mon... you can't do this to me! You promised!" Amber screamed when she felt Esmeralda slump against her lifelessly. "C'mon!!" she pled. "What am I gonna tell the rest?? Don't do this!!" shaking the body leaning against her none too gently.

"Amber...."

Her head jerked in the direction of Michael's voice, but she couldn't see him for the tears in her eyes. He stepped forward and put a hand on her shoulder. She flinched, but didn't pull away; she knew he wasn't to blame, but it was hard not to react.

"Amber... it's all right. The Father called her home is all."

"She's not...?"

"No. And apparently neither is Saphira. He sent me to fetch you home." He grinned and Amber couldn't help the small smile that etched itself onto her face. Michael didn't smile often... much less grin and she wondered what could be better than to know Saphira and Esmeralda were alive. Then he spoke. "He's restoring them. They're resuming their places in the Family."

"Oh Michael - seriously?"

Michael laughed aloud. "Seriously. And He has an announcement to make as well. So c'mon. We don't want to miss this."

"What about....?" motioning to Esmeralda's lifeless body still tangled with her own.

"It's just her human shell, Amber, but we need to leave it for someone to find. It will give closure that her simply disappearing from their lives won't. He's sending someone to both Charisma and Brianna to give them the idea to check on her. When they do, they'll find that she passed in her sleep. I imagine you'll be getting a phone call shortly thereafter, so c'mon. We don't want to miss the proceedings before you have to return to being human again for a little while, right?"

Amber untangled herself from Esmeralda and reverently laid her on the bed, pulling the cover up and brushing a cheek against already cooling flesh. Then she stood and took Michael's hand. "It still hurts, you know."

"I know," he replied sympathetically. "But it's not real, I promise."

Amber nodded. "Let's go. I wanna see this for myself." And in a blink, they were gone.



Chapter CVIII

Esmeralda kept her eyes closed and her hand clasped tightly in Saphira's even when she realized they had been whisked from the meadow. Without seeing, she could tell that they had been shunted directly into their home, and she kept her eyes closed for another moment, absorbing the scents and sounds she had missed for an eternity. Then she felt Saphira's arms slide around her middle and she naturally leaned into the strong body behind hers.

"Open your eyes, Es," Saphira whispered directly into her ear. "Open your eyes - we're home."

Esmeralda sucked in a deep breath, causing a smile to settle on her lips as the combined scents of home and Saphira filled her lungs. She let her eyes blink open and meet Saphira's, unable to keep a few tears from slipping down her cheeks.

"Tears, Sweetheart?"

Esmeralda chuckled and cupped her hand around Saphira's jaw. "Happy ones, Love." They both started when the Father cleared His throat nearby, gently reminding them of His presence.

"I'll give you a little while to clean up and prepare yourselves, but reacquainting yourselves," gesturing around the home they stood in, "will have to wait until after the announcement." He waited until they nodded their understanding, then He smiled and glided to the door. "I'll send a cherub for you shortly."

"We'll be ready, Father," Saphira assured Him and Esmeralda bobbed her agreement. Without another word, He left them alone.

For another moment, they simply stood still - soaking in the change in their reality. "We're home, Es. We're really, *finally* home."

"We're together again, Saphira. Everything else is just a bonus as far as I'm concerned. An amazing bonus, but...."

"... still just a bonus. I know," Saphira confessed with a grin. She slid her arms down Esmeralda's body until she could clasp her hands. "C'mon. I don't know how much time we've got, but I don't think it's gonna be a lot. And I really don't want to attend His party naked. That might be okay for the cherubs, but it's not appropriate for an Angel of Vengeance."

Esmeralda turned and brought their bodies flush, loosening her hands from Saphira's and winding them around her neck instead. "I don't care if it's appropriate for an Angel of Vengeance or not. You're mine and I don't share."

Saphira threw her head back and laughed aloud, even as she pulled Esmeralda tighter into her. "I seem to remember that about you," Saphira stated factually. "You've always lived up to those green eyes, but then... I'm not known for sharing either. Now c'mon - before we get caught naked by a cherub." And together they disappeared to prepare for their reception.

************

Michael had been correct if not accurate about someone alerting Charisma and Brianna about Esmeralda's passing. Jade had been delegated to the task of ensuring they felt the need to check on her - Jade chose a more direct approach.

Knowing that Brianna and Kay were staying the night with Charisma and Okasa - they had hoped to coax Esmeralda to join them, to no avail - Jade went directly to Charisma's home and made her way into Adam's room. It only took a few minutes of stroking her fingers through the dark hair before Adam's blue eyes blinked open sleepily... then widened when he saw an Angel sitting beside him on his bed. He reached out a hesitant hand, and Jade grasped it gently.

"Are you a real Angel?" he whispered, looking her over carefully. "You look kinda like Phira."

Jade blinked, but otherwise gave no reaction to his words. Instead, she offered him a small smile. "I am indeed a real Angel; Saphira was my friend. And our Father sent me here on a special mission, but I need your help."

"I get to be a Angel?" he asked, head cocked to one side as he gave Jade a beguiling smile.

"You get to be an Angel helper."

Adam studied Jade's eyes for a long moment, then nodded, satisfied with what he found there. "'Kay."

Jade grinned. "Good boy," messing up his hair slightly. Adam just laughed and Jade laughed with him before she sobered and met his eyes seriously. "Adam, what do you think would make Es happy again?

"Phira," he replied without hesitation. "Es misses Phira."

"You're right. And Es misses Phira so much that she needs to go find her and be with her again."

"Es is going 'way?"

Jade nodded. "Es is going away so she and Phira can be together."

"And Es will be happy again?"

"Es will be happy again."

"Good. Love Es - love Phira."

"And they love you. You were a very special blessing to them, and they will always hold you very dear in their hearts." Adam frowned and Jade waited while he considered her words carefully. Only when he nodded his understanding did she speak again. "Close your eyes." He scowled and crossed his arms over his chest. "Adam, you have to close your eyes so I can tell you how to be an Angel helper. It won't work otherwise." He pouted, then relented, closing his eyes so tightly they were crunched shut. Jade smirked and began running her hands through his hair again, feeling him relax into her touch. Just before he fell back into sleep, Jade leaned down and whispered into his ear. "When you wake up, tell your mama about your Angel dream."

"'Kay," he mumbled sleepily. Jade waited another minute until she was certain he was asleep again, then she left as silently as she'd come.

************

"So do you think the Father's announcement is about us being restored to the Family?" Esmeralda asked as she extended her wings fully for the first time in ages. The groan she made was almost orgasmic, but Saphira understood it was simply relief in being able to unfurl a part of her that had been tucked away for so long, Esmeralda had forgotten what it felt like. She stretched them to their fullest until they shook with the effort. Only then did she let them fall naturally behind her and turn to face Saphira directly. Saphira shrugged as she adjusted her robes.

"I guess. I'm not sure what we both requested. The only thing I ever really asked for that I can think of was for you to be restored to health. As much as I wanted to come home, I never asked for it." She shrugged again. "I guess we'll find out in a few minutes."

Esmeralda tipped her head to one side. "You don't seem very excited... or very curious, for that matter."

"I'm not. Don't get me wrong - I'm glad to be home and thrilled about being restored to my place in the grand scheme of things, I guess. But I've done without both, so it's not something I HAVE to have anymore. I have you again, and as long as I never have to ever be without you again, it's all good."

Esmeralda reached up and brushed a kiss over Saphira's cheek. "I love you," she said simply.

Saphira lifted her up and Esmeralda automatically wrapped her legs around Saphira's waist. "Good thing," Saphira stated, smiling when Esmeralda tangled her hands in long, dark tresses. "I love you too," urging Esmeralda closer....

... only to freeze when an embarrassed cough sounded from the doorway. " If the two of you can pull yourselves away from one another long enough to join us, the Father is ready and the rest of heaven is waiting."

Saphira and Esmeralda exchanged a long glance as Esmeralda slid back to the floor. Saphira extended her hand and squeezed tightly when Esmeralda clasped hers. "Fine, Rudy," Saphira said with a smirk and a hint of exasperation in her tone... though her eyes were twinkling in merriment. "If everyone is waiting on us, I suppose we should go," shooing him ahead of them. "Lead on," she commanded when he hesitated. "We don't want to keep everyone waiting."

With a nod, the cherub scampered out in front of them, and then they were heading to the Father's throne.

It was a soundless walk - apparently Rudy hadn't been kidding when he said the rest of heaven was waiting for them. No one was out - the streets of gold were empty; the choir loft was silent; no cherubs were at practice... even the saints had apparently retired to their mansions. Saphira and Esmeralda looked at one another, but they didn't have any answers and Rudy was intent on getting them into the Father's presence as quickly as possible.

In another moment, they were standing in front of the second set of Pearly Gates - these guarded the throne room instead of the entrance to heaven. Rudy came to a stop and turned to face them. "Wait here - and no funny business. I need to announce you."

"But He knows...."

"Of course HE knows, but the rest don't. Now wait here." Then he disappeared inside the gates.

Esmeralda frowned and looked at Saphira who was scowling hard enough to peel the opalescent finish from the gates. "He's awfully bossy for a cherub."

Saphira couldn't stop the snort that escaped her and they both snickered. "This is probably the most important task he's ever been assigned. I suppose I can't blame him for taking it so seriously."

"Maybe... but a please would have gone a long way."

Saphira snickered, biting her lip to keep it from becoming full-fledged laughter. "Maybe you should ask about instituting manners training for those that don't interact with mankind like you do. I don't think they appreciate the niceties like you do."

"A little courtesy doesn't hurt."

Saphira held up her hands in surrender. "No argument from me, Love. The world would be a much nicer place if everyone felt the same."

Before Esmeralda could make any kind of retort, the gates pushed open and Rudy was beckoning them inside with a broad smile. "Welcome home, you two," he said quietly. Then they crossed the threshold and entered a cacophony of sound that was nearly deafening. Their hands tightened around one another and moved forward together. It was time to return to the Family.

************

Their laughter wound down and Charisma looked around. "I'm glad we did this again. I just wish we could get Es to join us. I think it would do her a world of good."

Kay sighed. "You know she's not going to get better, Charisma - right?"

"You can't know that," Charisma ground out, trying desperately not to lash out at Kay in anger. If Brianna was going to remain in her life - and Charisma was determined to make that a permanent fact sooner rather than later - then she needed to stop resenting Kay and try to be friends with her. But it was really hard... especially now when Kay was the voice of reason telling Charisma something she definitely didn't want to hear. And despite what she'd told Adam only a couple weeks before, Charisma didn't want to believe that Esmeralda was dying.

"I can... and I do," Kay said with resignation. Some days she hated her job, and today was the epitome of that emotion. "I don't want to be right, but this is what I do for a living, Charisma. And Es is so honest she's an easy read. Her will to live died when Saphira did - it's simply a matter of her body catching up with her soul."

"That's not...."

"Fair? Right?" Kay asked sympathetically. "Maybe not from our point of view. But we're selfish and want to keep Es with us for as long as possible. But from her point of view it's not right or fair that she's had to be apart from her mate for so long. The best we can do is spend as much time with her as we can manage so her last memories are of being with family who loves and cares for her."

"That's hard when most of us are in another state," Okasa commented. Kay nodded her concurrence. "We'll do the best we can... keep doing these bi-weekly get-togethers for whatever time we have left with her." She looked at Kay. "Do you have any idea...?"

Kay shook her head. "There's no way to tell. Unlike a physical ailment, there aren't any monitors we can hook her to or any reading we can take. It all depends on how strong her will is, and I don't think Es' will is very strong as far as this goes. She's been worn down by so many other things for too long."

"I wish I knew how to contact her family - Amber and Ruby. They just disappeared after the funeral, and although Es was understanding about it, I know it hurt her," Brianna said.

"Maybe we should ask for her contact information when we see her again - you know... just in case. If something happens, we need to be able to get in touch with them," Charisma remarked and the rest dipped their heads in accord.

"Do we want to go over again tomorrow?" Okasa asked. "We don't want her to feel like we're smothering her."

"Mama?" The voice from the doorway caused all four women to snap their heads around and Brianna patted Charisma's hands and rose before Charisma could move. She walked to the doorway and knelt next to him. Adam threw his arms around her neck and she lifted him into her arms and stood.

"Hey Little Man - aren't you supposed to be in bed?" He yawned and rubbed his eyes furiously. "Did you have a bad dream?" He shook his head as much as he could with it tucked under her chin and Brianna frowned. "Then what's wrong, Son?" not noticing the smiles her choice of address brought to the three faces watching in concern.

"Angel said...." He yawned again and smacked his lips. "Angel said Es with Phira now. Es happy again," he reported, snuggling deeper into Brianna's embrace. She tightened her hold, even as she turned her alarmed gaze to the others in the room. They stood almost as a single unit and approached her from all sides. She leaned her head down and whispered into Adam's ears.

"Adam? Son, can you hear me?"

"Love Br'anna," he mumbled, but didn't open his eyes. Brianna sighed, but a nod from Charisma made her whisper again.

"Adam, when did you talk to the Angel?" But the only answer they got from him was the soft, even breaths of sleep. She looked at Charisma and shook her head. Charisma looked at Kay and Okasa before returning her attention back to Brianna.

"I think we should go check... just in case. How about if Kay and I go?" Brianna started to object, then realized Charisma might want to talk to Kay privately. And as nervous as that made Brianna, she knew they needed to form their own friendship outside of her if they were ever to become truly comfortable together - something she and Kent were going to have to work on as well.

"All right," she acquiesced. "Okasa and I will tuck Adam back into bed. Call when you get there?"

Charisma leaned over and brushed their lips together without thought, then froze. She hadn't intended their first kiss to be so casual... or in front of an audience. "Um...."

"Go," Brianna commanded. "We'll talk about that when you get home."

"Um...."

Kay snickered and turned Charisma towards the door. "C'mon, Senator. I'm pretty sure you want to have that conversation as soon as possible - in great length and with enthusiasm. The sooner we get your brain cells back on track and see about Es, the sooner you can come home and try that again without your son between you and an audience around."

"Kay," Brianna said sternly. "Stop teasing Charisma and go check on Es. One of you call us once you know something."

Kay frowned but bobbed her head as she and Charisma made their way to the garage. "I'd forgotten how bossy she gets," she muttered as she climbed into the passenger seat. Charisma chuckled.

"It's good to know some things never change." Then she pulled out of the garage and turned the SUV towards Esmeralda's house.

************

The house was dark and silent when they arrived, and they stared at one another with apprehension before exiting the SUV and walking to the door. Charisma knocked and rang the bell, but there was no response. Kay took her phone out - they could hear the phone inside ringing, but there was no sound to indicate anyone was home to answer it. They looked at one another before Charisma lifted the potted plant neat the door to swipe the extra key.

"Are you sure, Charisma?"

Charisma nodded. "Yes. Something's not right - we both know that. If Es is just sleeping deep, she'll forgive us; if not, we need to know."

"All right," Kay said, stepping aside. "You want me to...?" Charisma shook her head.

"No. I think this is something I need to do," sliding the key into the lock and opening the door. "Es?" she called out. "Es? It's Charisma. It's Charisma and Kay." They poked their heads into the living room and the kitchen before reaching the bedroom. The minute Charisma opened that door, they knew. But they crossed to the bed so they could check to be sure, tears welling when they saw the smile that graced Esmeralda's face in death.

"I think she found Saphira," Kay commented as she put the phone to her ear. Charisma nodded but didn't answer, then Kay's attention was taken explaining the situation to Brianna. "Don't speed," Kay cautioned Brianna. "We'll be here, but you need to get here safely, all right?" nodding when Brianna replied in the affirmative. Kay hung up and turned to Charisma. "Okasa is going to call the authorities in a few minutes and she's going to stay with Adam. Brianna is on her way over, and I'll head out when she arrives. I figure the two of you would like to say goodbye alone."

"Thank you," Charisma said quietly. "Thank you for understanding, and for.... I want you to know that I'm trying, Kay. I know you're important to Bri and that makes you important to me. I would like to try to be friends, but you're going to have to be patient with me. I'm selfish sometimes and I don't share very well - I never have. And I don't always like being told the truth... even if it's something I need to hear."

Kay smiled. "Do you love her, Charisma?"

"Heart and soul, Kay."

"That's all I need to know. The rest we can figure out as we go along." She saw bright lights turn into the drive. "Gotta go." She walked down the steps and intercepted Brianna, taking her keys and whispering something before getting into Brianna's vehicle and leaving. Brianna met Charisma in the doorway, and they embraced for a long moment before Brianna stepped back slightly and grasped Charisma hand.

"C'mon. Time to say our goodbyes before this place becomes a circus."



Chapter CIX

They walked to Esmeralda's bedside still holding hands, then Brianna dropped to her knees and Charisma released her hand, though she kept a hand on one shoulder. Brianna put both hands over Esmeralda's cooling ones, shivering when the reality of her death settled in the pit of her stomach. A tear rolled down her cheek, and Brianna let it fall, keeping her focus on the happiness and peace so clear on Esmeralda's face.

"Hey, Es," she said softly. "I know you're with Saphira - I can tell by the expression on your face. You look really happy to be wherever you are, so I hope we're not interrupting anything, but we wanted to say goodbye privately." Brianna paused and inhaled slowly. "You and Saphira were good friends, Es, and I'm not really sure I would have survived very long in this place without your friendship in my life. So thank you - thank you both so much. You were amazing, and I'm glad I got the chance to know you both." She sniffed and blew out a shaky breath. "Be happy, Es. We'll miss you."

"Thank you, Es," Charisma whispered before Brianna could shift from her position on the floor. She clenched the shoulder under her hand slightly, feeling Brianna cover that hand with one of hers and smiling at the warmth that followed. "For everything - your friendship; your faith; your encouragement and your love. You'll never know the true difference you made in my life - in the lives of everyone you touched. But we will, and we'll never forget. God bless you, Es. I hope you and Saphira enjoy happiness together in whatever eternity you share."

Brianna stood slowly and Charisma slipped behind her and slid her arms around her waist. Brianna didn't hesitate, but leaned into Charisma and covered her arms in a kind of reverse hug, sighing silently at just how right this felt. And she wondered if Esmeralda could see them - if she was happy for them. She looked at the smile again that Esmeralda wore and knew it for the truth.

"Kay thought Es must have found Saphira too," Charisma whispered into Brianna's ear. "Despite everything, that makes me happy... knowing they're together again. Because I know how wonderful that feels - to be reunited with the one you're meant to be with forever."

Brianna stiffened slightly, but before Charisma could react to her response, Brianna turned in Charisma's arms, and Charisma locked her arms around Brianna's waist. Not tightly, but enough to prevent her from leaving Charisma's embrace prematurely. To Charisma's surprise, Brianna didn't hesitate or try to pull away - instead, she wrapped her hands together behind Charisma's neck.

"Do you mean that, Charisma?"

Blue eyes studied green intently and the gaze was returned stare for stare. Charisma leaned their foreheads together so their eyes were forced to cross to keep one another in focus. "So much, Bri. I know it's taken me forever to get here, but the last few months have shown me so much I refused to see before - how much I missed you when you were out of my life; how glad I am to have you back... even as just my best friend again; how amazing you are and how much we have both grown while still remaining at our cores the women we were in college. But mostly I've learned how very much I love you, and just how right that feeling is." She lifted her head and looked in the direction of the bed where Esmeralda still rested in the peace she'd found in death. "If it was anyone else, I'd probably feel very weird about making this kind of confession by their deathbed, but it seems right that Es be witness to this. After all, she bears some of the responsibility for bringing us back together." Charisma looked back at Brianna, and wondered how she could ever have missed the look of love and devotion staring back at her. "I love you, Brianna Walker... so much. I'm sorry it took me so long to get to this point, but thank you for being patient with me. Thank you for giving me another chance."

She leaned her head down as Brianna tilted her head up, letting their lips come into full contact this time. It remained chaste - just a light touching of lips over and over as they made promises in front of the one witness who deserved to see them. And it was so new that they wanted to savor the sensations flowing between them with just the barest of connections. They understood... and knew Esmeralda would too.

After a moment, they eased their lips away from each other, chests heaving until one would have believed their interaction had been much more promiscuous. They met one another's gaze and grinned.

"Wow," Charisma whispered, unwilling to break the momentary peace that had settled over them. "That was...."

"It was," Brianna agreed. "And it's only going to get better, but not now. Right now we need to see if we can find a way to contact Ruby or Amber. And the police should be here...." The sound of cars pulling into the drive caught their attention and they stepped back, automatically straightening their attire. "Right on schedule," Brianna grumbled. Charisma smiled and took Brianna's hand.

"C'mon. Let's go let the police in and see what we can do about the other. We'll talk more about this later?"

"Of that you can be sure," Brianna promised, and they left Esmeralda lying in state with the smile still etched on her visage.

************

"Welcome home, my children," the Father's booming voice echoed across the throne room above the raucous cheers of heaven's inhabitants. Saphira and Esmeralda glanced around in awe - they had never expected such a grandiose celebration. Naturally, their hands tightened around each other's and they soaked in the happiness that was apparent on every face before looking at one another with questions writ large over their expressive countenances. The Father just chuckled and the sound brought their attention back to Him.

When they reached the bottom of the throne, they stopped and bowed their heads, waiting for whatever the Father had planned for them. They were more than a little surprised when they felt his gentle hands raise their eyes to meet His and realized He had left His throne and moved down the steps to greet them. His actions garnered even louder applause, and He let it roll for several moments before signaling for silence. Only then did He begin to speak.

"Before we get started with the official proceedings," He stated in a loud, clear voice over the soft hum that remained, "I think you should be aware that heaven almost had another uprising because of you two." The hum dropped to utter stillness and He rolled His eyes before He looked out at the gathered assembly. "People... hello? Omniscient here, remember?" shaking His head at Saphira and Esmeralda who simply bit their lips. He cleared His throat.

"Anyway, once everyone recalled how poorly the last revolt turned out, things settled down and we watched and waited. I want you to understand - the choices and decisions you made were all your own, as were the consequences that came with them. But there was a reason for everything that happened."

"Father?" Esmeralda interrupted quietly. "Brianna and Charisma - were they a real assignment?"

The Father smiled and nodded. "They were indeed. But they were also part of your testing, and you far exceeded every expectation," He added, lifting His hand and revealing a massive screen that showed their conversation with her and each other by her deathbed. "They still have things to work out and obstacles to overcome, but they got their second chance together. And from the sounds of it, they could actually make it work this time."

A buzzing sound interrupted His speech and He looked directly at Amber and motioned for her to answer the call. Saphira looked at Esmeralda. "When did we start getting cell reception up here?" asked out of the side of her mouth. Esmeralda shrugged; then her eyes grew wider when the Father beckoned Amber forward. She bobbed her head in respect, then put her hands on her hips and glared at both Saphira and Esmeralda.

"I am so angry with the two of you...." holding up a hand to cut off their outbursts. "I don't have time to deal with this at the moment. I have to return to Earth and take care of *your* final arrangements," poking her finger at Esmeralda. "But I'll be back, and when I am, we're going to sit down and discuss just what is and is not pertinent information."

"But...."

"Not a word," Amber cautioned. "We'll discuss this later." She looked at the Father. "If you'll excuse me," jerking her head in affirmation when He nodded once. Then Amber disappeared and He turned his attention back to a shell-shocked Saphira and Esmeralda.

"Perhaps we should get back to what brought us all together here today," He proposed with a smile, and was once more met with cheers and applause.

************

"Did you reach her?" Charisma asked as she dropped onto the couch beside Brianna. They had decided that Charisma would deal with the authorities, as she had actually been the one to find Esmeralda's body. So Brianna took responsibility for contacting Amber. She nodded.

"Yes. She didn't sound upset, though. It was weird."

"It's very possible that she was expecting this," Charisma responded. "Maybe she's like Kay and can see that kind of thing. And even though we know she hasn't been here, per se, it's entirely possible that she's been in touch with Es daily."

"Still, it was a little strange that she wasn't shaken up by this."

"Why?" Charisma asked reasonably. "We weren't. If anything we're sad for ourselves, but happy for Es... because she's finally regained peace."

Brianna narrowed her eyes. "Have you always been this... oh wait - I remember now. You have. It was one of the things that used to drive me crazy about you."

"And now?" asked coyly.

Brianna smirked. "Now, I'm just crazy about you period." She looked around at the quiet comings and goings of the various personnel that had been called to the scene. "How long do you think they need us to stay?"

Charisma shrugged. "I think it's mostly a formality - so there's someone here who can take responsibility for the house and all until Amber arrives. Once they've moved Es to the morgue, we should be able to go."

Brianna nodded and they settled in to wait.

************

Amber had jerked her head at Ruby as she left and without hesitation Ruby rose and followed her from the throne room. "Will you come with me? As far as the humans know, we are all the family that Es had. I think it might be best if we came together. Especially since they think we kinda suck for leaving her alone in the first place."

"We had no choice!" Ruby hissed in irritation. "He called and she insisted."

"I know that and you know that. But I'm pretty sure they don't know that and wouldn't understand the implications of it if they *did* know. I'd just like a little back-up if they're gonna jump on me."

Ruby nodded. "I've got your back, Amber. C'mon - the sooner we finish there, the sooner we can come back here. I want to know what His big announcement is."

"You mean there's more than them being restored to the Family?"

"I think so, because that was making the rounds as soon as Es' human form died and her spirit left the Earthly plane. But we won't know for certain until He says - you know how He likes the theatrics of a grand production. Remember creation? So I can't believe there's not something more to all this," motioning behind them, "than simply bringing them home again." Ruby shrugged. "My two cents, anyway. C'mon," she urged again, taking Amber's hand in her own and tugging her down the golden streets towards the entry gates. "Let's go lay Es' human body to rest. Then I think I'm gonna ask for a vacation."

Amber chuckled. Ruby had been using that threat for eternity and had yet to actually act on it. They waved to Peter as he managed the Book at the front of the gates, and headed back to Earth one more time.

************

"Thank you, Senator Tagherty, Senator Walker. I'm sorry it took so long."

"It's all right, Sergeant Archer," Brianna said. "Will someone let us know when the body is released?"

"Are you the next of kin?"

"No, but we've contacted her. She should be here shortly."

"Someone will contact her, then. I'm sorry. If she doesn't show up to claim the bod... um, her... I'll leave your contact information with the ME so he can get in touch with you."

"Thank you, Sergeant," Charisma said as she offered her hand. He accepted a handshake from both of them and with a tip of his hat, strolled out into the darkness. Brianna and Charisma looked around, then met each other's glance.

"Do you want to wait here?"

Brianna shook her head. "If we knew when to expect Amber, I'd say yes. But I feel like we're intruding now, and Amber didn't say when she'd be arriving. I think we should leave her a note with our phone numbers on it and wait for her to call. She may want a little time alone with Es first."

Charisma nodded. "You write it up - I'll go lock everything up. Then we'll go home and wait with Mama and Kay." They separated to take care of their tasks, and in a few minutes, they were walking out the door. Amber and Ruby remained hidden out of sight until the SUV disappeared down the road, then they entered the house that had been Saphira's and Esmeralda's.

Ruby turned and looked at Amber as soon as they crossed the threshold and had locked the door securely behind them. "You wanna tell me why we waited until they left to come inside?"

Amber sighed. "Because I don't want to deal with them tonight, Ruby. I'm sure the next few days are going to be filled with mortals again... and those two in particular. I'm not quite ready to deal with the questions and accusations that are going to be flying about where we've been and how we neglected her." She looked at Ruby, and Ruby could see the exhaustion in those golden eyes.

"This is really bothering you, isn't it?"

Amber dropped onto the couch that Charisma and Brianna had so recently shared and let her head fall into her hands. "Ruby, I was with Es when her soul left her body today. And for a few minutes, I thought Esmeralda was truly dead and I was never going to see her again... just like Saphira. I just need a night of peace before storming the lion's den, okay?"

Ruby sank onto the couch beside Amber and wrapped a strong arm around her shoulders. "Oh Sweetheart - I'm so sorry. I had no idea...."

"I know, Ruby. It's okay. Let's just... let's just get some sleep and see what we can see in the morning, all right?"

"Sounds like a plan," Ruby agreed as the stood and pulled Amber up along with her. "C'mon."

"I'm coming." Amber grumbled. "I hate this part of being human. What a waste of time."

"Maybe," Ruby said nonchalantly. "But we need it worse than they do at this point. I don't know about you, but I've been going non-stop since He called us back home. At least this should put paid to the assignment once and for all."

"I hope so," Amber replied, and followed Ruby upstairs. Tomorrow would come soon enough.

************

"We should call Matilda," Brianna commented as they pulled through the iron gates that guarded Charisma's home. She nodded.

"We will... as well as letting our fellow Senators know. But not tonight. Tonight I just want to spend a little time being thankful."

"For?"

"Esmeralda and what she meant to us... what she changed for us." Charisma pulled into the garage and shut off the engine. "I can safely say she played a large part in forcing me to take a good look at my life and recognize a number of truths about myself. Between her and Kay...." Charisma shook her head. "I'm glad we had friends looking out for us. I would never have found you again without them - at least... not in this sense," lifting their linked hands to eye level and brushing a kiss over Brianna's knuckles. "I would have settled for contentment and in doing so made sure at least three people never found real happiness."

"And now?"

"Now? Now I'm happy." Charisma held up her free hand even though Brianna hadn't made any attempt to speak. "Oh, I know we're going to have to work at this, and it's not going to be all moonlight and roses - we've lived together before, and this time there is the added element of being in love with one another and physical intimacy. It's going to be hard and I'm sure sometimes it's going to be ugly because we're both strong, dominant personalities, but I want this, Bri. I *want* to work on this... to see what we can be together."

"And your campaign? Despite Maxwell's claims, I don't have any direct ties to the Mob, but I am still going to be a liability."

"I don't see that," Charisma retorted. "But we should discuss it. If it's going to make you uncomfortable, I won't run."

"Charisma - this has been your dream since you were five. I can't be the reason you give it up. I don't want you to resent me five or ten or twenty years from now when you discover...." Fingertips on her lips made her stop speaking and Charisma leaned their foreheads together and blinked a tear into her lashes. She hadn't understood until this very moment how very fragile her friend... her lover... really was - especially about anything concerning *her*. She slid her free hand from soft lips and laced it into Brianna 's blonde hair.

"I want you to listen to me, Brianna - I want you to understand and believe everything I am going to tell you," waiting for Brianna to nod. "Good. Brianna... dreams change. And although my entire life has been geared towards becoming the first woman President, it's not my only focus anymore - it hasn't been for a while. Now, while I would be absolutely thrilled if at some point we decide to pursue a Presidential campaign with you at my side, it's not the be-all and end-all for me anymore."

"How can you know that?"

Charisma chuckled. "Because I've had years to realize what that single-mindedness cost me, and I'm not willing to settle for contentment anymore." She tilted her head enough to capture Brianna's lips, and this kiss wasn't chaste. It was hot and passionate and Charisma used her lips and tongue to convey every bit of feeling she possessed. Brianna responded as though she'd been granted her greatest wish - fervently and aggressively. Charisma smiled at the reverence Brianna managed to radiate within her desire and eased back until they could look into one another's eyes again. "Got it?"

Brianna smiled shyly. "You might have to remind me from time to time."

"It'll be my pleasure. Now let's go inside before Mama comes looking for us. It's not that I'm discomfited about making out, but being caught in the car by my mother would just be embarrassing."

Brianna laughed and they exited the car. "Is it wrong to feel happy... considering Es, I mean?" squeezing Charisma's hand when it captured hers.

"I don't think so. Es would understand, and she'd be the first to congratulate us. I just wish she'd lived to see it."

"I'd like to think she still can."



Chapter CX

"Senator Tagherty? This is Amber. You left a note for me to contact you...?"

"Yes, Amber. Thank you for getting back to me so quickly. Hang on while I put you on speakerphone." A beat. "How are you?"

Amber scrubbed a hand over her face and sighed. "Surprisingly, I'm okay. I'm angry at Es for dying, but at the same time, I know she's happy again, and it's hard to blame her for wanting that... even if it meant she had to die to find it again."

"So you think she's happy?"

Amber smiled, and although they couldn't see her expression through the phone line, they could definitely hear the truth in her voice. "Oh Senator... I *know* she is. She and Saphira have been together since their inception practically, and I know the first thing Es did was hunt Saphira up." She chuckled, and the sound caused Charisma to smile even without knowing the reason for it. "I kinda wish I'd been there at the beginning of that reunion. I'm betting Es gave Saphira an earful."

Now Charisma and Brianna laughed, having both been on the receiving end of getting an earful from Esmeralda. Kay and Okasa were a little more perplexed, but let it slide in the interest of moving things along. "I'll just bet she did. Saphira's ears are probably still ringing," causing Amber to snort. Charisma cleared her throat. "Amber, have you made any arrangements?"

Amber looked at Ruby who had remained silent during the whole exchange. Ruby shrugged and Amber sighed. "Not yet, Senator. I'm still waiting to hear back from the medical examiner saying they're releasing her body." She cleared her throat awkwardly - even though she knew the truth of both Esmeralda's and Saphira's deaths now, the terror she'd felt in those first few moments after Esmeralda's passing was still fresh in her mind. "I know she wanted to be cremated."

"Are you planning to have a service?" Brianna asked quietly.

"Um... no? I haven't really given it much thought. We just got back into town late last night."

"We?"

"Ruby's here with me."

Brianna nodded, even though Amber couldn't see the motion. "Well, if you don't feel comfortable planning something, would you allow us to? I know she was your family, but there are a lot of people on the Hill that called her friend and they'd probably like the chance to say goodbye."

"Will this be like Saphira's service was?"

"Similar," Charisma offered, "except that we won't hold the wake afterward unless you want to accept condolences from folks. We did it for Es because we wanted her to know how much support she had here."

"Would you excuse us for just a moment?" Amber queried and Charisma gave her affirmation. The line went silent for a few minutes except for some rustling background noises, and Charisma and Brianna stayed quiet while Amber and Ruby had a bit of private dialogue. When they were done, the rustling disappeared and was replaced with Amber's voice.

"We'd be happy to have your help planning a service like Saphira's - if you could get the word to those who you think need to know, we'll let you know as soon as we can make the arrangements. We'd rather not do the wake thing - although it's great to know that Es was appreciated by the people she worked for and with, it really doesn't make much difference to us in the long run," Amber stated bluntly. Okasa opened her mouth to retort, but a shake of Charisma's head made her jaw snap shut before she could comment on what she perceived to be Amber's rudeness. "I don't mean to sound harsh," Amber continued as though she sensed Okasa's objection, "but we're on a very tight schedule. The Father expects us to wrap things up quickly and return home."

"I'm not sure I like the sound of your Father," Brianna commented candidly. "Why exactly isn't He here? I mean... He's partially responsible for what happened to Saphira and Es since He's the one who disowned them and all."

Amber pinched the bridge of her nose between her thumb and forefinger while Ruby rubbed her back in an effort to alleviate the stress she could feel building. "It's not quite that simple," Amber replied with a sigh. "And Es and Saphira would be the first to understand why He was unable to be here."

"Explain it to me," Brianna demanded. "I'd like to understand."

"I can't," Amber said simply. "We don't have that kind of time."

"Make the time!"

"Brianna," said Charisma softly.
"Senator," Amber responded at the same time, her tone a plea. Brianna sighed.

"I'm sorry, Amber. I know it's none of my business, really, but you know...?"

"It's all right, Senator. I do understand how you feel. I wish there was a simple way for me to explain it so that you'd know what I know. But it's just not possible."

"You'll call us as soon as you hear something?" Charisma asked when the silence threatened to drag on too long.

"Of course, Senator. If you could call the funeral home...."

"Absolutely," Charisma assured Amber. "We'll be in touch."

"Thank you, Senator," Amber said and hung up without another word. She turned back to Ruby and blew out a breath, making her bangs flutter in the aftermath. "Well, I think the hard part is done. They will feel better being able to be a part of saying goodbye, and we have time to take care of the rest of the stuff that needs to be done."

"We can't just dispose of stuff like we normally do, I suppose."

"You know better. Unlike the rest of us, Es and Phira were human beings... not stand-ins like everyone else and not non-corporeal like Coral and I were. They existed as themselves on this plane - so we need to pack up their things and pay the remaining bills and whatever else needs taken care of so we can go home."

"All right," Ruby agreed. "Where do you want to start?"

"Let's start at the top and work down. We can clean as we go." Ruby nodded and they walked up the stairs and fell to work with a will.

************

Charisma called the funeral parlor and spoke to Mr. Prescott while Brianna took the responsibility for speaking to Matilda. Matilda was upset of course... especially as it seemed there would be no one to cook for, and cooking was her panacea for everything. Still, she knew she needed to respect the wishes of the family, and was glad she had been notified of Esmeralda's passing... regardless of the sadness it brought to her heart.

Once those two calls were completed, Brianna contacted Indi and Charisma called Opal and both Senators gave instructions for their assistants to inform the other Senators on their floor of what was going on. Then they leaned back with a sigh of relief and waited for Kay and Okasa to finish the phone calls to their respective families. Into this stepped Adam, rubbing his eyes and yawning as he crawled in Charisma's lap.

"Good morning, Son," she greeted with a brush of her lips over his forehead. He hugged her neck and held on tightly. Charisma looked down in concern. "Adam?"

"Why did Es go 'way, Mama?" he asked, tilting his head back to look into her eyes. She glanced at Brianna in shock. Brianna shook her head. No one had told him of Esmeralda's death.

"How do you know Es is gone, Adam?" Brianna asked.

"Angel," he replied succinctly, snuggling back into Charisma's neck. "She said Es went to Phira and Phira went away. Why did Es go?"

"Because she needed Saphira, Son. But remember... you told us Es was happy again. That's a good thing, right?"

"Miss Es," he grumbled.

"Oh Sweetie... we'll all miss Es. We just have to remember she's in a much happier place with Saphira now. And you know something else?" feeling him shake his head against her. "I'll bet Es and Phira both will be keeping an eye on you - you know... like Guardian Angels."

Adam's eyes widened and he craned his head back again so he could look Charisma in the eye. "Really?"

Charisma and Brianna both nodded seriously. "Really. It just seems like an Es kind of thing to do."

"'Kay," he agreed. "I hungry, Mama."

Ah, the resilience of children, Charisma thought, chuckling when she met Brianna's eyes. "Well... let's get you fed. I have it on good authority that your daddy will be here in a little while."

"We go see 'saurs?"

"Maybe," Charisma hedged. "We can ask Daddy when he gets here, okay?"

"'Kay!" he agreed enthusiastically, then pointed towards the kitchen. "Bre'fast?"

"Sounds like a plan, Little Man."

************

"Thanks for coming early, Kent," Charisma said as she invited him into her home. He crossed the threshold and nodded, clapping his hands together in an effort to keep from touching her. On the one hand, she was his almost-ex and it would just be awkward... at least for a little while. On the other, she was the mother of his son and had just lost someone she counted as a dear friend.

"Of course, Charisma," turning as she closed the door behind him. "Thank you for calling me." She led him into her study where they could talk privately for a moment. Brianna was with Adam in the kitchen and Okasa and Kay had left to meet their families at the train station. "What's up?" he asked with only a hint of surprise in his voice at being admitted into her private sanctuary.

Charisma sighed and motioned him to take a seat on one couch while she sat across from him on the other. "I wanted to let you know what was going on with Adam, so you don't get blindsided by things if he brings them up." He looked concerned, but just nodded for her to continue. So she told him of Adam's recent 'Angel' experiences, and when he looked at her skeptically, she sighed. "I wouldn't have believed it either, Kent... but he's the reason we went to check on Es last night. Somehow - whether it was divine interference or whatever, he *knew* Es was dead."

Kent held up his hands in surrender. "All right, Charisma... all right. I believe you. Do you think he's okay?"

"He seems to be." She cleared her throat. "You should also know that he and Brianna seem to be bonding... more than before, I mean," seeing him smirk. "He went right to her when he got up last night to tell us about Es. And she called him 'Son'."

"Good," Kent replied emphatically. "So he'll have three parents that love him... maybe four."

"Kent?"

"Look, I was going to give these to you the next time I saw you - I didn't think it was going to be before another funeral. I thought about saving them, but after what you said, I think you're probably ready for them," placing a stack of legal papers on the table between them. Charisma glanced at them and then back at Kent before reaching for them, absently noting that she wasn't particularly surprised to be holding a decree of divorce in her hands.

"I thought you were going to wait for me to decide...." trailing off when he cut in.

"I was. But I've seen you and Brianna together, and you just assuaged my last real concern - Adam obviously idolizes her and she's already been so good for you. I don't want you to miss an opportunity because we're still legally together."

"Is there someone new in your life, Kent?"

"Maybe," he replied honestly. "But we've done nothing more than share a cup of coffee once or twice. I won't embarrass you, Charisma - I promised that. But I would not be averse to pursuing something more once I am unattached."

"I appreciate your candor," Charisma said, rising from her spot and moving to her desk. She flipped through the paperwork, glad she understood legalese. "Are you sure about this, Kent? That's a very generous settlement for Adam. I don't need...."

"I know, but he's my son and I want to do my part in supporting him. Start another college fund for him - who knows... maybe he'll find someone to travel the world with after school and he'll be able to travel in style."

Charisma snorted, but couldn't stop the tears that welled in her eyes. "Only if he's really lucky," she murmured. "Are you sure every other weekend is enough?"

"I thought we could be flexible - if I can spend more time and you're willing to let me have it...."

"He's your son too, Kent - whenever you want to spend time with him is a good thing... as long as it doesn't interfere with his school schedule."

"Of course. And if you need someone to look after him when it's not my turn to have him, you only have to ask. I'll be on the next flight down. I would like him for at least one whole month in the summer."

Charisma nodded. "How would you feel about taking him for the whole summer this year... or at least most of it?" signing her name to the documents with a flourish.

"Are you campaigning?" rising to take his copy of the papers and tucking them back into his pocket.

"I don't think so," Charisma said, shaking her head slowly. "Laura is more than a little put out with me about this whole business, and she was furious that I refused to remove Brianna from my life."

"Okaaaay," Kent drawled in obvious confusion. "So why...?"

Charisma sighed. "Twenty years ago, Brianna and I made our epic trip to Europe - it was the last time we spent together until she came to Washington last summer." Kent nodded and waited for her to continue. "On that trip, we agreed to do it again in twenty years... unless I was already the President. I was so far in denial about her having walked out of my life for good then, I even had Mama arrange things. We haven't really talked about it yet, but if she's willing...."

Kent smiled. "Good for you, Charisma. Consider Adam taken care of for the summer."

"She hasn't said yes, yet."

"Maybe," Kent shrugged. "But she hasn't said no either. Have a little faith."

"I still don't get why you're being so cool about all of this."

"Because I want you to be happy, and Brianna does that for you just being in the same room. And I'd like to find that for myself."

"Keep reminding me," Charisma said as they exited the study and she pulled the door shut behind them. "One day it might sink in."

Kent snorted. "We'll all be in the nursing home by then," ducking her swat with a laugh, "but I'll do my part. Make sure you pay attention, okay?" Charisma just gave him a dirty look, and his laughter preceded them into the kitchen. Adam looked up from the matching game he'd been playing with Brianna.

"PA!" standing on his chair and jumping into Kent's arms. Kent caught him and swung him around, making his giggles echo throughout the kitchen.

"Hey, Boy!" Kent exclaimed when they stopped spinning.

"Pa, we go see 'saurs?"

Kent looked at Charisma, who just shrugged and nodded. He looked back at his son with a grin. "I think that sounds like a fine idea, Son." He set Adam down on the floor, keeping a hand on his shoulder so Adam wouldn't run off. "Why don't you tell Mama and Brianna goodbye, and then you and me'll go see some dinosaurs - ROAR!"

Adam laughed again. "Funny Daddy," he snickered, but turned dutifully to the two women in the room. He ran to Charisma first, wrapping his arms around her legs and waiting for her to pick him up with a groan.

"You're getting so big, Son. You're going to have to start picking Mama up instead." He laughed and threw his arms around her neck, leaning forward to plant a big kiss on her cheek.

"Love Mama," he exclaimed. Charisma grinned.

"I love you too, Adam. Be a good boy for your daddy, all right?"

"'Kay!" came his emphatic agreement. Charisma set him on his feet and he ran and crawled into Brianna's lap just as she set the memory cards aside. He put his hands on either side of her face and leaned forward until their noses brushed together. "Love Br'anna."

She hugged him tightly. "Love you too, Little Man. Have a good time with your daddy."

"Yes!" he agreed, before scrambling off her lap and running to Kent to take his hand. "We go see 'saurs now?"

"We go see 'saurs now," Kent said. "Bye ladies," he offered with a wave, then turned and walked out of the kitchen with Adam in tow. Then Charisma turned to Brianna.

"C'mon," she said, extending her hand and pulling Brianna from her seat at the table. "I want to talk to you before the family gets here. Or before Amber or Mr. Prescott call back."

"Sounds serious," Brianna replied.

"It is... a little. But only because it's about us and our future. It's nothing bad, I promise. But if we're going to do this, we have to communicate - we have to be able to talk about everything."

"That sounds eerily familiar," Brianna said with a small smile.

"It should. Now c'mon. It's a beautiful day - will you walk with me?"

"Anytime, anywhere," Brianna answered without hesitation. Charisma just beamed as she led her out the door into the backyard gardens.



Chapter CXI

"So Kent and I just signed our divorce decree," Charisma volunteered without preamble when they were some distance from the house. "He did it for himself as well as us. He indicated there might be someone new in his future soon as well."

"Are you okay with it?"

Charisma squeezed the hand she held and gave Brianna a blinding grin. "I'm more than okay with it. Now he can look for the happiness he so richly deserves. And we can move forward and start making plans for us." She was met with silence and a furrowed brow. "I mean... if you want to," Charisma hastened on. "Brianna, you've been very subdued about everything since offering me another chance - letting me make all the decisions for us. I don't want to do that. I want *us* to make decisions... together. This is *our* life... not just mine."

"Maybe," Brianna agreed with a shrug, "but your future will be the most affected by us... no matter what kind of us we are."

"That's enough!" Charisma roared, though she never raised her voice. "I won't do this on my own, Brianna - I can't! So you need to decide whether you're in or out... because I need you all the way committed to this."

Brianna inclined her head until she could look into Charisma's eyes. They stood perfectly still while green studied blue... searching for any hint of doubt or hesitancy. When she was satisfied with what she found, she nodded her head and smiled.

"All right, so..." Brianna said as she started walking again, pulling Charisma along with her. "I know that your plans called for you to be running for President in the next election," seeing Charisma smile softly and nod her agreement. "Right. Would you be opposed to postponing them just a little while?"

"What are you proposing?"

"If you'd be willing to wait until the next election cycle, it would give us time - time to become an us; time to get our footing; time to formulate a strategy that doesn't strictly focus on your perceived lack of family values... meaning your recent divorce from Kent or our involvement with one another. I know both of those things will be a consideration no matter when you run, but at least we will have been a family for a while by then, and there will be less for your critics and opponents to mock."

"You really have been thinking about this."

"I have. I don't want you to give up your dream, Charisma - I believe you could make one hell of a difference in that seat of power. And I think you'd have a much better chance of winning the election if we weren't so new together. Right now - it will be all they'll want to talk about. You'll never get to talk about the issues or your platform. In a few years, though...."

"Would it surprise you to know I've been thinking along those very same lines?" chuckling when Brianna smirked and shook her head. "Okay, so we've decided what to do about the Presidential election. What do you want to do about our European trip? Kent has already assured me he'd love to have Adam for the summer. I think he wants to get him into the City to show him there is more in the world than dinosaurs."

Brianna laughed. "I remember there being dinosaurs there too."

"I haven't pointed that out to Kent. Adam will figure it out soon enough."

"As far as Europe goes, since I'm not running for re-election, I don't have to get out and campaign and glad hand during the summer break. I'd like to go back and see how different it is with you as a real adult."

"Hey! We were adults when we went. We got drunk on more than one occasion, as I recall."

"Since the legal drinking age in some of the countries we visited starts at sixteen, you're really not making much of a case for yourself, Ri."

"Not the lawyer here, Brianna Brianna. Still, I say we do it. We only live once, and I feel like we've lost too much time and too many opportunities already. So I'll tell Mama."

"I don't think she'll be surprised."

Charisma smirked. "I know she won't."

************

Amber and Ruby slowed to a stop outside the attic, clearly able to hear sound coming from within, but unable to distinguish what was making it. Amber shrugged as nonchalantly as she could manage. "Whatever it is, it's not like it can really hurt us, right? I mean, we're still full-fledged Angels." Ruby nodded and gestured towards the door. "Right," Amber agreed. "Let's do this."

So saying, she opened the door forcefully, causing the noise to drop into stunned silence. Eyes met and jaws dropped, but before either Amber or Ruby could formulate a question, Opal spoke up. "The Father asked us to come. Es wants you to be there for His big announcement and we all know that it will take some time to get this done. So when He asked, we all said yes," motioning around to the rest of the crew that has been part of this mission. "We felt we owed it to Es."

"Wait," Amber said, holding up one hand as the other pinched the bridge of her nose. "He *asked*?"

"He asked," Indi assured with a nod from the rest.

"Well, I'll be," she muttered under her breath, though it was loud enough to draw smiles from the entire contingent of Angels currently ensconced in the attic. "Will wonders never cease." Amber shook her head to clear it, then looked around the room. "Right - so where are you at?"

"We just arrived. We were trying to decide if we should work as a group top to bottom or spilt up and try to do it all at once. The middle levels will only need cursory cleaning - there are no personal effects in the rooms we used."

Amber nodded and glanced around, glad to see these women - her friends - together again... even for something as mundane as mission wrap-up. In the months they had been reassigned after this case, they had been isolated from one another except for the barest of greetings in passing. And the Father had kept them so busy, even that was hard to manage some days. Amber wondered again if He'd had a purpose behind His method - figuring He likely did, but knowing she'd never truly understand unless He deigned to explain Himself to them. Not that He was obliged to, of course, but it did occasionally get frustrating to be left out of the loop on things like this.

"Well," she said after a moment of silence, "I think with this many bodies we'd probably be better served if we split up. We'd avoid running into one another and could probably get done before the end of the day. I'm waiting for a call letting me know that they've...." Amber paused to clear her throat, feeling it tighten at the memory of how real it had been. "Sorry," glad for Ruby's steadying presence. "I'm waiting to hear that the hospital has released the body to the funeral home. Once that's done, Charisma and Brianna have offered to help set up a service. It'll be similar to what we did for Phira without the wake."

"So cremation again?"

"Yes."

"Okay," they acknowledged, then turned and started dividing up the work seamlessly. Amber was sent downstairs and accompanied by most of the others as the ground floor was the one that would require the most work. They did drop off a couple on the middle levels to ensure that nothing got missed and everything was clean when they left.

They spread out downstairs - living room and kitchen, leaving the bedroom to Amber. She stood in front of the closed door for a long moment, hesitant to enter the room that had been Esmeralda's and Saphira's private retreat from the rest of the world while they had been sequestered on Earth. Even when she'd shared living space with them, her room had been upstairs away from them, offering them whatever privacy she could as a human. She'd rarely entered this room with an invitation, much less without one. And knowing Esmeralda had died here in her arms was not making her task any easier.

Amber was so lost in thought she jumped when Ruby's hand slid to the small of her back. She turned to offer the older woman a glare, but only managed a sigh when she found compassion in Ruby's eyes.

"Sorry, hon - I thought you heard me walk up behind you. You all right?"

"Honestly, Ruby, I think I'm a little freaked out. I know Es is alive. I just saw her. But I saw her die... felt her die in my arms. And being here again...." She shook her head, curls bouncing everywhere. "This was theirs, you know? We all respected that."

"Would you rather someone else do their room, Amber? We left it for you because you're even more their family than we are, despite the role I played while I was here. But if it's going to make you uncomfortable... or miserable...."

"No, Ruby - it's my privilege and my responsibility. I just... it's weird."

Ruby snorted indelicately, causing Amber to snicker and relax slightly. "Amber, this entire mission was weird from the get-go. C'mon," she said, patting Amber's back lightly. "I'll help with this bit, and then we can go find out what the big news is. I am curious to know if it's actually worth the weirdness we put up with on this case."

"Ruby, I can't think of a single, solitary thing that valuable."

"Guess we'll find out soon enough." She reached for the doorknob. "C'mon - sooner started, sooner finished."

Amber rolled her eyes, but covered Ruby's hand so they turned the knob together. "That was one of my least favorite of your teaching expressions, you know."

"Of course," Ruby grinned. "Why do you think I used it?" pushing the door open and urging Amber inside with the hand still resting on her back. She snickered when Amber cut her eyes over in a glare, then followed her into the room. The hard part was over.

************

"So what do you think about all this, Mama?" Patrick asked hours later when he and Okasa were getting ready for bed. After he and the boys and their families had arrived in the city, they'd gone directly to Charisma's house to be met with the news of her divorce and her decision not to run for President in the next election. The family had been quietly supportive, knowing that Charisma and Brianna did need time to become a couple privately before their relationship was thrust into the public limelight.

Still, something about the whole situation niggled at Paddy, and he turned to the woman who for almost fifty years had been his confidante, lover and friend. Okasa frowned at him and climbed into the bed, scooting up to lean against the headboard and smoothing the covers around her. She tipped her head to one side.

"What part of all this, Paddy? The divorce? Charisma and Brianna as a couple? Charisma postponing her dream?"

"Is that what you think she's doing... postponing it? You don't think she's giving it up?"

Okasa slid her fingers under her glasses and pinched the bridge of her nose, feeling her shoulders tighten in reaction. She knew Patrick was trying not to be difficult, but she wondered where the hell this was coming from all of a sudden and decided to ask. She removed her glasses and set them carefully on the bedside table, then turned to give Patrick her full attention.

"What are you thinking, Paddy? Where's this coming from?"

He set down the cup of water on his nightstand and sat down on the edge of the bed, rubbing his hands over his face before sighing and slipping under the sheet beside his wife. "I'm not concerned about the divorce - it doesn't actually affect us personally, and both Kent and Charisma seem happier now than they've been in a long time. And you know how I feel about Charisma and Brianna as a couple - she's been a daughter of my heart almost since the day I met her in Charisma's dorm room. We've waited a long, long time for them to reach this point together."

"So it's the Presidential thing?" Okasa asked when Patrick stopped talking. "Paddy, you heard your daughter - she and Brianna agreed that it would be better for them to wait until they've had a little time together first. They're right... and you know it." Okasa paused when she saw Patrick's shoulders sag. "You heard what they said - it's not never... just not now."

"I know... and I want to believe that. Okasa, this has been Charisma's dream her whole life. I just don't want to see her give it up in case...." His words ceased when Okasa held up a hand while glaring fiercely at him.

"Don't you dare finish that sentence, Patrick Tagherty. She deserves happiness, and if Brianna makes her happy, that should be enough for you."

"It is, Okasa," he chastised with a hint of hurt in his tone. "I just don't want regret over this decision to be an issue for them later. They've waited so long to be happy."

"Do you *really* think they haven't thought of that... discussed it? Paddy, Brianna and I talked about it when Charisma and Kay went to check on Es. She'll make sure Charisma doesn't regret it, because Brianna is prepared to do what it takes to ensure Charisma follows that dream if that's what Charisma wants. But they've made a good choice in deciding to wait. This will let them be stronger together."

Patrick chuckled and Okasa twitched an eyebrow at him. He smiled and patted her hand. "Charisma should hire you to be her campaign manager. Between you and Brianna, anyone she runs against doesn't stand a chance."

Okasa laughed aloud and squeezed his hand. "Flatterer," smiling when he waggled his eyebrows at her. "Feel better?"

"Yep," he said, sliding down until he was mostly reclined on the bed. "I just wanted to make sure I wasn't misreading things."

"Rest easy there, Papa. Your princess still has her eye on the prize. HER princess won't let her lose sight of it as long as they're chasing the dream together."

Patrick reached over and turned out his lamp, shifting a little until he was facing Okasa who looked down at him with a smile. "I wonder how Senator Maxwell feels about that," he commented innocuously. Okasa snorted.

"If she's smart, she'll keep any less than complimentary thoughts to herself. Pretty sure she won't survive the evisceration that will follow any unfavorable commentary she makes." Okasa flipped off her light, then sank down onto the mattress with a sigh. "I just wish Es could have lived to see this."

"Why?" Patrick asked softly. "I mean... I would much rather she and Saphira both were here to witness what's finally happening, but because it would mean they were here with us more than for any other reason. But it's not like they've been waiting decades for this to happen - not like we have."

Okasa shrugged and turned to face him in the darkness that was just highlighted by the moonlight peeking through the curtains that weren't completely closed. "Maybe. But Es did have more to do with them coming together again than all the rest of us combined." She reached up a hand to cover his mouth when she felt him draw breath to speak. "I'll tell you one day, but not tonight. Tonight I just want to sleep for a while so we can go say goodbye to Es tomorrow."

Patrick nodded and kissed her fingertips, and Okasa removed her hand from his lips. "Do you think Brianna and Charisma were right? Do you think Es found Saphira and is happy again?"

"I'd like to think so. It gives me a little peace, especially knowing what they were to one another in life."

Patrick didn't respond verbally. Instead he scooted over until he could embrace her and Okasa sank into his arms with a contented sigh. It wasn't long until they were entwined together in sleep.

************

"That was a little surprising," Brianna said as she and Charisma sat together on the small couch in her study. The wine they had poured sat practically untouched on the coffee table in front of them, and though touching along their lengths, only their hands were tangled together. Gentle fingertips of their unattached hands traced paths along smooth skin, even though neither woman was conscious of their actions. Charisma nodded.

"I certainly didn't expect it. I thought Amber had kind of written us off, given how curt we were earlier." She noticed Brianna's furrowed brow. "Something wrong, Bri?"

Brianna bit her lip as she shook her head slowly. "I'm not sure how to say what I want to convey tomorrow. Es was an amazing woman, Ri - she helped bring us together despite ourselves," garnering a small chuckle from Charisma and smiling in response. "I'm not sure ... the writer in me wants to find the perfect words to say about her, but so much of what I feel seems too personal to share... especially with people who didn't know Es like we did."

Charisma shifted so she could wrap an arm around Brianna's shoulders, smiling when Brianna snuggled closer and the blonde head tucked itself under her chin. She took Brianna's hands in her other hand, rubbing her thumb along the length of hand she could reach. "What's to say they don't, Bri? It's not like any of us have really shared what Es was to us beyond her job title. It's very likely she was the same person to everyone else that she was to us... a friend. Besides, you only have to share what you're comfortable with. Es would understand that."

"I just want to do her justice, Ri. I feel like I owe that to her."

"Speak from your heart, Bri. That's what I'm going to do," frowning when her cell phone started ringing. She sighed when she saw who it was from, then rolled her eyes in Brianna's direction as she answered the call on speakerphone. "Hello, Laura."

"Good evening, Charisma. I didn't catch you at a bad time, did I?"

"Of course not," Charisma replied when Brianna shook her head. "What can I do for you?"

"I wanted to speak to you about your campaign. I might have been a little hasty in dismissing your words the other day. I've been considering what you said, and I think we can work the Brianna Walker angle to your advantage."

"Laura...."

"Just give me a chance, Charisma - hear me out."

"Laura, I'm not going to run."

"Now here's what I was thin.... excuse me??"

"I'm not running this election. Brianna and I are going to take some time to be a couple... to become a family."

"You can't do that!"

"I can and I am. The Presidency isn't going anywhere, Laura, and I'd actually have a better shot in the campaign following this one. It's not up for discussion, Laura. I appreciate the time and effort you've put into this, and if you don't want to back me when I *do* run, I'll understand. But this isn't going to happen now."

"I knew that woman...."

"Before you say anything else, you should know Brianna is sitting right here listening to every word. Laura, I think we make a formidable team, and if we work together when I'm ready, I know we can win. But I need to do this... for me. Brianna's right - if I run now, it won't be about the issues or my platform or even politics. It will be about us... her and me. Not running this time means it should be a non-issue by the time the election rolls around again."

They could almost hear Maxwell thinking over the phone, and neither was surprised when she agreed. "All right," she accepted grudgingly. "Perhaps we can get together sometime soon and lay out some long-term plans and goals. Your... friend seems to have a good head on her shoulders, Charisma. Perhaps it's time I got to know her as more than simply Senator Walker or that woman."

Brianna and Charisma both laughed and Laura couldn't help but join them. "I'll have Opal call Indi and Jess - we'll see what we can arrange. Goodnight, Laura."

"Goodnight, ladies."

"And on that note, I think I'll head home," Brianna said. "Tomorrow's going to be a busy day."



Chapter CXII

"Are you ready?" Ruby asked Amber as they stepped from the empty house and closed the door solidly behind them. They and the others had spent the entire night cleaning and packing away the few items that had actually been part of Esmeralda's and Saphira's earthly home. Jas had volunteered to drive the truck containing them to the local shelter for donation, and the rest had gone ahead to the funeral parlor. Despite knowing the truth, they would be there just as they had for Saphira's service. Then they would all return home together.

Amber glanced around at the building and tiny yard that had been her home for so many months and sighed. "Yeah," she replied tiredly. "Let's go give these mortals the closure they need. I'm ready to go home."

Ruby frowned. "Amber? Are you all right?"

Amber huffed. "I'm still a little ticked off with the whole mess, if you must know. Thinking that they were dead… there better be some seriously good payoff for putting us through that." She drew a shaky breath and Ruby just waited. "Sorry, Ruby. I think my exhaustion is getting the better of me."

Ruby took her arm and they walked towards the road, knowing the taxi they had called would be arriving shortly. "Amber? Why did you ask Charisma and Brianna to offer a eulogy? Isn't that your place to do so?"

Amber shrugged. "Perhaps. And if it was true... if Es was really dead, I would probably be the only one speaking at her service. But she did so much for these two - I'd like to hear what they have to say about her."

"Then let's go," Ruby commented as the cab pulled up in front of them.

************

"I look around this room," Charisma said with a soft smile, "and it says so much to me about the kind of person Esmeralda was. Much of society overlooked her... or looked down on her because of who she was and what she did. And yet I'd be willing to bet that every single person in this room considered her a friend. Because that was just who Es was - she was a friend to everyone," meeting eyes and seeing every head nod its agreement with her assessment. She smiled again. "It didn't matter to her if you were a Senator or a personal assistant or a colleague... rich or poor... young or old. All Esmeralda saw were friends." Charisma looked down and cleared her throat. "I can't speak for the rest of you, but I know having Es for a friend made an impact in my life. And unlike the musical, knowing her did change me for the better... and for good."

Charisma let her eyes meet Brianna's and she paused again to blink away the tears. When she was certain she could speak again, Charisma took a deep breath and let her gaze rove over the entire room. "I saw Esmeralda shortly after she died. And as much as it pained me to know I... we," motioning around the room, "would never again know the wisdom of her counsel or the warmth of her understanding, I couldn't be unhappy that she'd finally found peace."

Charisma took another breath and looked up at the ceiling with a smile. "Thank you, Es. I know you're happy in whatever reality you're in now, and try not to be too hard on Saphira, okay? Remember everyone deserves a second chance... just like the one you helped make sure I got."

She took her seat next to Brianna, and Brianna took her hand for a brief moment and whispered something that drew a smile from Charisma even as she wiped the tears from her eyes. Then Brianna stood and made her way to the podium.

"Most of you know who I am, although many of you don't like me... or at least don't know how to take me. Because when I came here, I didn't come to make friends or influence people. I didn't seek this job; I came here as a favor - to hold the seat until the next election. I figured I could do two years here... no sweat." Brianna snorted. "And I got lost the minute I got into town," reaping quiet chuckles from all over the room. Most of them had been in the same situation once upon a time.

"But you know something? I have blessed the day that I came to this pompous, overblown city and gotten lost. Because that little bump in my road caused me to find Esmeralda and Saphira and be reminded that there are real, caring people still left in the world." Brianna bit her lip and looked around the room. "They reminded me of the Good Samaritan parable I heard in Sunday School as a child - taking care of a stranger for no other reason than it was the right thing to do. And the only thing they asked in return was my friendship."

Brianna looked around the room again, letting her eyes linger on those people she recognized until she finally met Charisma's and held there. "I will never be able to repay the kindness shown to me by them, but I would like to think that I'll be better than I was because of what they gave to me." She too leaned her head back to stare at the ceiling with a smile. "Es, I know you can hear me, and I know you're with Saphira again. Be happy, my friends, and thank you. Thank you for making my world a better place to be in. God bless you both."

Brianna kept her eyes riveted on the ceiling for several moments, before Adam's voice rang out in the stillness. "Bye, Es." Then as if on cue, Luke and Kay started harmonizing 'Amazing Grace', and it wasn't long until the entire congregation was singing as well. When the first verse was done, people rose from their seats, slowly taking their leave as they continued to sing. Amber and Ruby stood at the door, accepting hugs from these strangers who had known Esmeralda enough to want to say goodbye.

By the fourth verse, only the Taghertys, Kay's family and Brianna were left in the chapel and they finished the song as they exited the building, leaving only Brianna and Charisma to say goodbye to Amber and Ruby.

"Thank you," Brianna said quietly. "For letting us say goodbye. The words were inadequate to the feelings, but I'd like to think that maybe somewhere out there, Es heard them and smiled."

Amber nodded, tears shining in her eyes. She'd been glad to know that Esmeralda had been as highly thought of by so many as she had, but hearing them all sing together, as if they had been easing her spirit into the next life.... That had moved Amber in ways she hadn't been touched in centuries.

"I'm willing to bet she did, Senator. I'm willing to bet she did."

"Will you two be okay getting back...?" Charisma trailed off, not sure exactly where they were headed. Ruby took up the question and nodded with a sad smile.

"We'll be fine, Senator Tagherty. I know you don't think much of the Father, but he's taking care of things now. We'll be all right."

"If you're sure...?" Brianna queried.

"We are. Go on now. Go live your lives and be happy together. You know that's what Es would have wanted." Charisma and Brianna exchanged startled looks, then turned wide eyes on Ruby who nodded.

"Thank you, Ruby," Brianna finally said. "Godspeed your journeys home." And without another word, they walked down the steps hand in hand and entered the limousine that was waiting for the two of them. Amber and Ruby watched it out of sight before turning to the rest of the Angels who were waiting for them.

"Let's go home, ladies."

************

"Are you all right, Love?" Saphira asked as they turned away from the monitor. They had asked the Father to postpone His announcement until the team returned home to hear the news firsthand with the rest of Heaven. He had granted their request, starting their 'Welcome Home' banquet instead - that would keep those gathered happy and busy until such time as the rest were home once more.

In the midst of all the gaiety and celebration, Esmeralda had approached the Father, and at His nod, taken Saphira's hand and led her to the viewing room. Saphira looked around, then back at Esmeralda in question, wondering what had brought them here in the middle of their own gala. "Es?" coming up behind her and wrapping her in strong arms. "What's going on?" Esmeralda turned in Saphira's embrace, laying her head on Saphira's shoulder and smiling into her neck when Saphira tightened her hold. Saphira brushed a kiss over blonde hair and whispered, "Es?"

"I'm okay, Phira. I asked the Father if we could watch my funeral. I know it sounds kind of morbid, but I'm curious." Saphira cocked an eyebrow, but didn't release her grip, merely waiting for Esmeralda to continue. "Charisma and Brianna planned your service - they spoke about you, and it made my heart glad to hear what they had to say about you."

"You think they'll speak again?"

"If Amber doesn't, yes."

Saphira nodded. "All right then... turn it up," gesturing to the screen that was currently showing the small chapel where Esmeralda's ashes had been placed. Esmeralda put her back to Saphira's front once again, and triggered the volume so they could hear. Saphira watched with interest the number of people that were already seated, even as more slowly trickled in behind. "That's a lot of people."

"It was the same for yours, Saphira."

"Really?"

"Yes, now shh...." seeing Matilda approach Charisma and Brianna after she'd spoken to Amber and Ruby.

"I'll still expect to see you two girls every Wednesday night for dinner," Matilda scolded without preamble. "No excuses."

Brianna and Charisma communicated with one another silently for a long moment, then covered each of Matilda's hands with one of their own. "We wouldn't dream of missing, Matilda. Es would probably come back and kick our collective butts if we let something that important slide. You don't treat friends and family like that, you know. We may bring Adam from time to time if that's okay," Charisma stated, seeing a twinkle flash in Matilda's sad eyes.

"Joe and I would like that."

"Good. We'll plan on it then." Matilda moved away then and Esmeralda and Saphira continued to watch the proceedings with interest. Saphira held Esmeralda when Charisma and Brianna spoke, but they both cried when Adam said goodbye. When the assembly began singing, Esmeralda turned back to Saphira and simply held on.

"That was remarkable," Saphira whispered in her ear as the sound from the screen tapered off into silence. "Do you think the Father would understand if we took a few minutes before the girls get back to collect ourselves?"

"I think He'd be surprised if we didn't - omniscient, remember?"

Saphira chuckled and Esmeralda laughed, and with that, a weight was lifted from them and they sighed in relief, as a burden they hadn't known they were carrying was suddenly gone from their shoulders.
"Good - c'mon. I'm sure He'll send Rudy to fetch us back if we take too long." She extended her hand to Esmeralda who accepted it with alacrity, then pulled Saphira towards the doorway. Then they were racing for their home, a lightness in their steps causing them to laugh in pure, unadulterated joy.

The Father smiled from the head of the table and continued to bask in the celebration going on around Him.

************

"Brianna? This is Scott Patterson. Look - I don't really like you, and I certainly don't owe you anything, but I do think you're more than capable of carrying out your threat against me. I want you to know that none of this is my doing. So I'd appreciate it if you don't mention Trevor Carlson in retaliation for the bevy of reporters that are waiting to speak to you and Tagherty. I didn't call them."

Brianna frowned when the message tone beeped at her, effectively ending the call. She hit 'replay' and listened to it twice more before dialing Charisma.

"Ri... I think we have a problem."

************

"Senator Tagherty! Senator Tagherty!! Is it true that you divorced your husband so you could 'go gay' for Senator Walker?"

"Senator Walker! Did you come to Washington for the express purpose of breaking up Senator Tagherty's marriage?"

"How long have you been having an affair?"
"What was your family's reaction to you outing yourself as a lesbian?"
"Does this mean you won't be running for President?"
"What does Adam think about having two mommies?"

"Okay!!! That's enough!!" Brianna roared, causing an almost instantaneous hush to fall over the crowd blocking their way into the Senate Building. "You can ask whatever questions you like - we don't have to answer anything, but freedom of the press and all that. But you bring a child into this and all bets are off, understood?? You leave him out of this."

The reporters blinked - stunned by the outburst and the one who had spoken. They had been so sure Senator Tagherty would be the one to react. And by the time they had shaken off their surprise, Charisma and Brianna were inside the building.

They looked at one another in stunned silence for a moment, then burst into nervous giggles. "I'm not sure that helped our case any," Charisma said through her laughter, "but that was fabulous. I don't think I've seen anything that funny in a long time. It was nice to see them get back some of what they give all the time."

"Yes, well... I probably shouldn't have spoken out of turn like that, but I really do not like reporters. And when they went after Adam...." The ringing of their cell phones simultaneously cut off her words. When Brianna answered, it was Kay on the other end and Kent was on the other side of Charisma's call. The next few minutes were spent chatting and laughing - Kay congratulating Brianna on her biting witticism that kept the press at bay; Kent ensuring both Brianna and Charisma were all right. When their calls were over, Brianna and Charisma exchanged glances and entered the lift, clasping their hands together as they headed upstairs.

"I guess we need to sit down and formulate some sort of press release. Because we both know this news has gone viral already."

"I might have something," Brianna offered. "I drafted it this morning so it's a little rough. But I think it says what we want it to." The elevator stopped and they released each other's hands as the doors opened, maintaining a sense of propriety in the workplace despite their desire to cling to one another for support. They exited together, ignoring the stares and the whispers they were getting from their colleagues and the numerous staffers apparently scattered randomly down the hallway. Brianna tugged Charisma into her office, nodding to Indi as they passed directing into the inner sanctum. Indi nodded back and continued to answer the phone that never stopped ringing.

Brianna closed the door behind them, then led Charisma directly to the couch, seating her and plopping into the cushion beside her. She popped the locks on her briefcase, and withdrew a yellow legal pad. Charisma's eyes widened in delight, recognizing the handwriting she had missed. Brianna chuckled at her expression.

"Charisma?"

"You still...." holding up the pad. "I missed this. I missed reading your raw stuff. I used to love it when you'd come in and pass me one of these. I never knew what I was going to get, but I always knew it would be good." She frowned. "Is this how Fontana writes?"

Brianna laughed. "Depends on my mood, actually - and whatever's available to me when inspiration hits. But yes... sometimes this is still the way Fontana writes."

"Good," Charisma muttered, and turned her attention to the page in front of her.

************

"And in a joint statement from the offices of Senator Charisma Tagherty and Senator Brianna Walker about the rumors flying around the capital about their illicit affair, the two had this to say...." The reporter glanced down at the screen set into her desk - though it was completely unnecessary with the teleprompter that was positioned next to the camera - before she faced the lens squarely. "While it is true that we are together in a very new romantic relationship, we have been in love for a very long time. Senator Walker recognized it in college - Senator Tagherty refused to. It is what caused us to be apart from one another for twenty years. Though we realize people want to hear the dirty laundry being aired, there is simply nothing inappropriate between us to share - no illicit affair; no secret liaisons; no hidden funny business - just two people finally acknowledging something that had been true for years. That being said, the divorce between Senator Tagherty and her husband Kent Rockwell was both mutual and amicable, and was in fact instigated at Mr. Rockwell's behest."

The reported glanced down, then back up at the camera. "Mr. Rockwell had this to say," as a monitor started rolling footage of Kent Rockwell. "Charisma and I were friends long before we decided to marry - we were content as a married couple, but we were never happy like she is now. Brianna Walker makes her happy and as her friend, I want her to be happy." He shrugged. "Who knows - maybe I'll find that kind of happiness myself."

The screen came back to the news anchor and she spoke again. "The Senators' statement continues - At some time in the near future, we will have a press conference to allow questions. Until then, we won't be answering any inquiries - please try to respect that and keep in mind that Adam Tagherty is completely off limits in all aspects. Those who have difficulty with either of those concepts will not be permitted to attend the press conference."

The reported cleared her throat. "Several of the Senators colleagues were approached by various news agencies and were basically stonewalled. We're not sure what caused this unprecedented closing of the ranks, but we'll keep digging."

************

"So what happened?" Charisma asked as she leaned forward to accept the drink from Laura. Brianna sipped on hers as she leaned back to watch the other two Senators. Laura walked from the bar and took a seat on the couch across from the one Brianna and Charisma were settled in. She studied them and shook her head even as she chuckled.

"I'm not sure - I didn't send out any instructions." She snorted. "I'm a little surprised to tell you the truth. You know how cutthroat some of the people in this business are. I'd have thought...."

"... that they'd take advantage of a perceived weakness?"

"Yes... exactly. Although," Laura turned to Brianna, "you were exceptionally forceful this morning with the press, and not many can hold their own against those vultures without the benefit of security and a written speech. Guess that being a writer thing helps you think on your feet, huh?"

"Sometimes," Brianna conceded. "Do you know who they talked to? The reporters, I mean."

"I can find out. Why?"

Brianna shrugged. "Just curious. I wonder how many of them were at Es' service."

Laura rubbed her forehead. "Why would that matter?"

"Because we both spoke about the value of friendship - it was something Es was especially good at. And everyone who was at her funeral knew that."

Laura sighed. "I wish I had known her. She sounds like she was a truly remarkable woman."

"She was, Laura. She really was."



Chapter CXIII

The knock on the door startled both of them out of their reverie. It wasn't that they had been doing anything that would cause them to be caught in a compromising position yet again - once of that was bad enough, and it had already happened twice to them. It was simply that most of the rest of heaven tended to use the celestial chimes... except for Rudy, of course. But since they had taken care to close the door completely, there was no way to be disturbed by the clearing of a throat. Still, though they were expecting a request to return to the banquet - they were the guests of honor, after all - Saphira and Esmeralda traded confused glances. They certainly hadn't anticipated a knock at their door to call them back to the festivities.

Saphira extended her hand as Esmeralda did the same and they held hands as they moved in tandem to the doorway of their home. Saphira looked at Esmeralda with a question in her eyes and Esmeralda just nodded her head. Saphira opened the door....

... and was nearly punched in the face when Amber went to bang on the door again. Only Saphira's quick reflexes kept her from harm - which only lasted until Amber could twist out of her grip and shove Saphira out of her path as she stomped in the door. Saphira's expression contorted into something less than welcoming, and it was only Esmeralda's hand on her arm that kept her from lashing out. Instead, she wrapped her body around Esmeralda's from behind and simply waited. Esmeralda covered Saphira's arms with her hands and spoke softly.

"Hello, Amber. Please come in and make yourself at home," seeing Amber was still standing in the foyer, arms crossed over her chest glowering at both of them. "What can we do for you?" Esmeralda asked, stepping forward out of Saphira's embrace and approaching Amber cautiously when the silence started to grow uncomfortable.

Amber snorted. "You're kidding me, right?" backing away from Esmeralda before she could touch her. "Do you have any idea how furious I am at the moment??" She turned her gaze to Saphira. "I can forgive Es - she was dying because we thought you were DEAD, Saphira!!! How could you do that to her, huh? How could you do that to us??" moving in close enough to take a swing and wincing when it actually connected. She had fully expected Saphira to stop the blow... just as she had at the door. Instead, Saphira just let it make contact, warning Esmeralda back with her eyes and the tiniest shake of her head. Esmeralda sighed unhappily and crossed her arms as she watched the tableau play out in front of her. She knew it needed to happen, but it didn't make her any happier to witness.

Saphira lifted a hand to her face, casually wiping blood from her nose and split lip. She stared at her hand, then glanced down at her robe, realizing she didn't really have anywhere she could wipe it. Esmeralda sighed loudly and left the foyer, confident that Amber's anger had been tempered by her action enough that nothing else crucial would happen in the few moments she would be gone. She was correct - when Esmeralda returned, neither Amber nor Saphira had moved from the spot she'd left them in.

Esmeralda slipped between them, taking care *not* to push Amber away as she tended to Saphira. She gently wiped the blood from Saphira's face and hand with a wet cloth, wincing in reflex when Saphira flinched. She patted it dry, pleased to see her ministrations were successful in stemming the blood flow. Esmeralda lightly kissed first the nose then the lips, smiling when the injuries began to heal. Then she stepped back away from the confrontation, understanding they needed to finish what had been started long before Amber had come crashing into their home.

Saphira kept her arms at her sides, looking at Amber with sadness in her eyes. "Do you feel better, Amber?" she asked with concern, no trace of anger or sarcasm in her tone. Amber studied Saphira's countenance for a minute, then dropped her gaze to the floor.

"I think your face broke my hand," she muttered. Saphira sighed and looked at Esmeralda. As a clean-up Guardian, she was much better equipped to heal than an Angel of Vengeance such as Saphira was. Esmeralda shook her head and walked between them again, catching Amber's wrist in her hands and tenderly lifting it enough to examine it.

"I think you're right," Esmeralda replied, gently manipulating the bones back into place. Amber clamped her jaw tight, grinding her teeth hard enough that Esmeralda could hear the squeak. "I'm sorry, Amber; I'm not trying to hurt you."

"I know, Es. And it's my own fault, so nothing for you to be sorry for. Can you kiss it and make it better like you did for Phira?" not seeing Saphira relax when she heard the familiarity roll from Amber's lips. But Esmeralda felt it and smiled.

"I can kiss and make it start healing - it's going to be a little uncomfortable for a bit, though. The bones still have to re-knit themselves whole again."

"I know," watching as Esmeralda ghosted her lips over her knuckles. "Thanks, Es."

"Anytime, Amber," Esmeralda offered, cupping Amber's cheek with her free hand. "Are you ready to go sit down and talk about this rationally?"

"Not really," she mumbled. "I'm still very angry." She sighed and carefully removed her hand from Esmeralda grasp. "On the other hand, we need to get this settled before the Father sends someone after us to return to the banquet. He seems kind of anxious to make His announcement... whatever it is."

Esmeralda gestured towards one side of the house, then reached back and took Saphira's hand, and together they joined Amber in the living room. They seated themselves across from her and waited for Amber to speak. Finally, Amber looked right at Saphira, staring into her eyes as though to divine the truth without speaking. When Saphira held her gaze without flinching, Amber nodded and spoke.

"Why, Phira? Why did you let us think you were dead? Why... how...?" She ran her fingers through her hair and groaned. "What were you thinking??"

Saphira waited another moment, wanting to be sure Amber was done before she started to speak. When she was satisfied, she nodded slowly and clasped Esmeralda's hand a little tighter. Then she cleared her throat and replied.

"I had very little choice once a course of action had been decided on," Saphira said. She held up her free hand before Amber could interrupt. "Es was dying, Amber; being kicked out of our home was killing her - I know you could see it," watching as Amber nodded her reluctant agreement. "I did what I needed to do to make her healthy again. I had no way of knowing I was going to die as a result... or that Es would follow because our bond was broken." Saphira drew a shuddering breath. "That wasn't actually something I was made aware of until after I was gone."

"And after? Phira, I know she couldn't find you in her dreams."

"My situation and yours were very similar, Amber. Just as you could not contact her without the Father's permission once you returned home, I was not allowed contact with anyone except Rudy and a couple other cherubs who occasionally stopped by the holding place where I was waiting. I was allowed to watch, but I couldn't interfere."

"To what purpose?"

Saphira shrugged. "We haven't been told."

"I still think it was a test of faith," Esmeralda chimed in.

"Whose?" Amber asked plaintively. "Because if that's the case, I think there was a lot more testing being done than just the two of you."

"I don't know," Esmeralda responded honestly. "I don't think we'll ever know if He decides not to share."

Amber sighed. "Did you really not know you were going to die?"

Saphira shook her head. "I had no idea. I sincerely apologized for the actions that got us banished, and acknowledged that I could have looked for other ways to handle the situation. The only thing I expected was to be offered forgiveness and a chance to come home. I knew Es would heal here."

"You admitted you were wrong?!?"

"Sort of, I guess... but not exactly," Saphira answered.

Amber chuckled. "It kills you to admit you made a mistake doesn't it?" ignoring the glare Saphira was sending her way. She laughed, but held up her hands in surrender when she felt Saphira shifting in frustration. She knew what that meant, and they were so close to putting this whole debacle behind them - she didn't want there to be more trouble. No amount of teasing was worth going through another mission like this one had been… EVER. "I'm glad it worked out, regardless of what you had to do to get it done. Next time, though - ask for a few more details and try to share them. I can speak for the whole team when I tell you none of us was thrilled to be left in the dark."

"If it makes you feel better, Amber, I was in the dark too until I got here, and even then, I didn't know everything. I still don't."

"Is your bond back?" Amber asked bluntly as she looked between the two of them, having little doubt of the answer, but wanting to hear it from them directly.

"From the moment I took my last breath on the Earthly plane," Esmeralda replied, her expression one of such joy, Amber couldn't doubt her words. "It's the reason I was smiling, Amber."

Amber snorted. "Yeah, you did seem suspiciously content. I, on the other hand...."

Esmeralda leaned forward and took Amber's undamaged hand in hers. "I'm sorry Amber. I didn't know...."

"I know. How could you?" She squeezed the hand covering hers lightly before releasing it. Then she slapped it on her leg and stood. "Now, what do you two say to us going back to that banquet? I'm pretty sure you're expected, and everyone is waiting for you to return before the Father makes his announcement." Her stomach growled, and she smiled sheepishly. "Besides, I'm starving. I haven't eaten in a while." She turned to Saphira. "We all right?"

Saphira gave her a cocky half-smile. "Aren't we always?"

Amber smirked and headed towards the door. "I dunno about you, Phira, but I'm usually spectacular."

"And modest," Saphira mumbled, though it was loud enough for Amber to understand her. Amber snickered.

"I don't need to be modest - I'm just that good." They laughed together and the tension fell away, then they headed back to the banquet.

************

The cheer that went up when they re-entered the banquet hall was deafening, and it caused the Father to leave His throne again to greet them once more. "Welcome back, ladies!" He said with His arms outstretched, garnering another round of cheers. "I trust everything is settled now?" giving Amber a significant look.

"Yes, Father," they replied together.

"Very good," gracing them all with an indulgent smile. "Come then - it is time for you to feast. Then I will tell you all a little story."

************

The Father had risen from His throne, but remained on the dais looking out at the vast company of Angels seated around as far as the eye could see. Saphira and Esmeralda had taken seats on the top step, but the rest had spread out on the golden floor, not wanting to impinge on whatever it was that the Father had in mind for Esmeralda and Saphira. The Father maintained His vigil for long moments, meeting the eyes of each and every individual in the room, grateful beyond measure for their unfailing loyalty in spite of everything. They watched the proceedings with interest, and as His eyes moved on to the next, the silence in the room grew to absolute stillness. Nevertheless, they were all thankful for the outstanding acoustics in the room when the Father began to speak in His normal, soft tone.

"My children," He began. "I know there has been a lot of confusion and hurt and even anger in your midst in recent days. And though none of you spoke out to Me about it, I am aware of the resentment and frustration many of you have felt. I assure you it was necessary.

When you have been a society for as long as we have, you reach a place where stagnancy and complacency become the way of life, and that will destroy you. For us, it has the tendency to destroy those that we are supposed to care for - not just each other... but our mortal charges as well.

"What happened between Brianna and Charisma should never have occurred. Their watcher grew lazy, and by the time he saw fit to notify us, it was too late." The Father took a deep breath. "I knew what was happening of course - that omniscient thing again - but given the rules we operate under, there was little I could do to change it... at least immediately.

When Saphira took matters into her own hands - when she broke the rules because she felt it was the right thing to do - she provided the opportunity that allowed us to send a team in to help Brianna and Charisma. However, since she was being punished for her rash actions, there had to be some consequence - she and Esmeralda were cut off from us and made human. I didn't do it to be cruel - I wanted to know how they would cope, living as humanity does."

He strode back and forth on the platform, aware that every eye in the room was following his movement. "I had a reason - actually, I had several reasons. Esmeralda believes it was a test of faith." He nodded. "I suppose you could look at it like that. A few of the Angels that served on this mission think it was some sort of experiment." He shrugged. "Perhaps, but not in the way any of you envisioned. I wanted to know how they would function with the unexpected - no real resources... able to count only on one another." He looked down at Esmeralda and Saphira and smiled.

"You two passed my wildest expectations, because it wasn't just the two of you for very long. You went out and made friends and found people who cared because you cared first. It was quite amazing to watch you create another family - one you hadn't been born to but that loved you just the same. And when you helped Brianna Walker that first time, with no thought of yourselves... providing for a stranger from what little you had because it was the right thing to do - that's when I sent the rest of the team in. I was confident you could pull off a victory with those two."

"But why didn't you give us the support we needed, Father? This all could have ended so much quicker with the same results if we'd just had...."

"Would it, Es?" the Father queried kindly. "Charisma Tagherty possesses a stubbornness to rival your mate's. And Brianna Walker was tired in her very soul. Do you think you would have achieved the same success any faster with more support... knowing what you do about them?" He waited patiently for her answer as did the rest of heaven.

"Perhaps... not," she conceded.

"Besides," the Father reminded her gently, "there was still Saphira's punishment to be gotten through. And you chose to share that with her. As much as I love you, I wasn't going to negate your choice by forcing anything. Had you elected to leave her to return home, you would have had access to every resource available. But we both know that would have been an epic fail for everyone involved," looking around when snickering broke out across the room. "What??" He asked plaintively. "It's not like I'm not aware of this stuff, and I get tired of everything being a disaster." He turned back to Esmeralda.

"No - despite all the grumbling and frustration, things played out the way they should."

"So we were supposed to die? You couldn't have just brought us home?"

"Your deaths were to give closure to those left on the human plane. You had become so integral in the lives of those you were mentoring that simply disappearing would have been intolerable; it would have undone all your hard work to get them together because they would have been focused on finding you instead of working on becoming a couple. Unacceptable. Keeping you alive and moving you would have caused... complications." He turned His attention to Amber. "And before you ask, it needed to be real - they needed to be convinced that it was real to be able to say goodbye. So I kept it as real as I could."

"Can I ask why?" Amber replied. "What was so important that You needed to cause so much chaos for so many of us here? I understand the human element - I do work with them on a regular basis. But why the elaborate scheming? Why couldn't we know the truth? What could possibly be worth...?"

The Father held up His hands and Amber trailed off. "When Esmeralda and Saphira were first mated to one another, it wasn't a surprise for anyone here was it?" listening to the negative murmurings all over the room. "Of course not - even though it happened much sooner for them than it has for most of you, it was unmistakable. There's an aura around them that everyone can feel even if they can't see it - humanity is sensitive to it as well. All of you have one to some extent and when you meet your mate, it blends and becomes stronger.

When Saphira and Esmeralda merged, they became more than mates - they became a family. And over time, they wanted more. Each of them - separately and unknown to the other - came to me and made a request. They wanted a child... their child." Excited rumblings ran around the room and the Father stood perfectly still waiting for it to die down. Saphira and Esmeralda gripped one another's hands, stunned to realize what their shared appeal to the Father had been.

When it was quiet again, the Father looked out at the multitude, smiling benignly at the excitement he could feel throughout the room. "Saphira once commented about my regretting giving humanity free will." He smirked at the blush that traveled up her face. "I don't regret it as much as I wish I had been a little more selective about some things. And this assignment gave Me a second chance to do that - it gave Me the opportunity to see how Saphira and Esmeralda responded to the unfair and the unexpected and the unknown. It was very enlightening and you far exceeded any expectations I had for you. And it made Me realize that it was time to reward the depth of your love for one another."

The Father looked between the two of them and smiled, then offered them His hands to pull them up on the dais beside Him. "If you both still desire to add to your family by having a child together, you have my blessing."

Saphira and Esmeralda didn't hear the cheers and applause that rang out around them. They only had eyes for each other. The Father stepped just out of their view and they met in a long embrace - Saphira had set herself immediately, knowing Esmeralda was going to jump into her arms and Esmeralda didn't disappoint. For long moments they remained wrapped up in one another, heads buried in each other's necks as they trembled with excitement and joy.

Finally, Saphira felt Esmeralda mumbling against her skin and pulled back just enough to look into sparkling green eyes. "Es?"

"We're gonna have a baby, Phira. We're gonna have a baby!!" Her eyes widened and she turned her head to look at the Father. He had returned to His throne and was watching them with a contented smile resting on His lips. She tugged gently on Saphira's neck, and Saphira released her to stand on her own once more. Esmeralda caught Saphira's hand in hers and walked to the throne, dropping to her knees when she reached it.

"Thank you, Father. We couldn't have asked for a greater honor."

"You've earned it, Esmeralda. You both have. And it will be nice to have some fresh blood here; we could use it." He looked around and saw the team that had served with Esmeralda on so many occasions waiting for them at the base of the stairs and jerked His head in their direction. "I think you have some people waiting to congratulate you. Go. We will talk soon and iron out the details."

They bowed their heads. "Thank you, Father," they offered together. Then they rose and walked towards their friends. For the first time in a very long time, heaven was alive with excitement, and they were ready to celebrate. Tomorrow would be the beginning of a new era, but tonight was all about being home again. It was good to be home... at last.



Chapter CXIV

Of course, the temporary injunction surrounding Brianna's and Charisma's personal life didn't last too long - the press took their statement as a challenge to dig up everything they could find and try to turn it into story fodder. Strangely, there was little for them to sensationalize. Brianna had never been outspoken about her sexuality, but she'd never made an effort to hide it either. That made for very little to find out that wasn't already public knowledge. And her friends and colleagues mostly closed ranks - offering either no comment or words of praise for her work ethic and congratulations on the personal front.

Digging into Charisma's life had nearly the same result - she had been planning her political career almost since she could speak, and definitely since she could read and write and there was simply nothing there for them to find - no dirt to dig up... no scandal to embellish upon. In fact, despite the press' best efforts and their frustration with their inability to produce any sort of ignominy they could exploit, there was a grudging admiration for Charisma's strong ethics. That in and of itself was story worthy at a time when shame and disgrace seemed to be the norm and not the exception.

The only action she had taken that could be considered morally questionable was her divorce from Kent and her subsequent liaison with Brianna Walker, and even that was progressing so slowly in public that Victorian standards would be considered loose by comparison. So far, the most anyone had seen was them holding hands and staring to the point where the action became serious eye sex. Once they had been witnessed leaning into one another, wrapping their arms around each other for support. Charisma had actually brushed a kiss against Brianna's temple, but otherwise things between them publicly remained almost Puritan in nature.

That isn't to say they didn't indulge in some heavy petting and long make-out sessions when they were alone together, because they certainly did. As soon as the divorce decree had been signed they had stepped up their physical intimacy by mutual, unspoken consent, though they had yet to completely consummate their union. Not from lack of desire, but rather a longing to make it special for each other, and rushing for a lack of time or privacy wasn't especially romantic. It did make for a lot of frustration and grumpy mornings though. They were both secretly counting the days until their European trip.

Still, their public decorum was, in point of fact, very maddening for members of the fifth estate - there was nothing for them to dramatize. The public, however, was quite fascinated. It was like watching a faery tale come to life and surprisingly, most weren't concerned that the two principal players were women. They were more enamored with the story being told in front of them.

Of course, as the saying goes - into every life a little rain must fall - and Brianna and Charisma were no exception to that... especially as there was a small minority whose entire political platforms focused on hatred and bigotry towards anything that varied from their own very public moral code. Even though their colleagues had originally rebuffed any inquiries made about them, those select few felt they could further their own righteousness by focusing attention on the perceived moral ambiguity that Charisma's and Brianna's actions had caused in an otherwise stellar career.

Thus, only two weeks after their statement to the press, and only a month before their scheduled trip to Europe, the Ethics committee convened with the intent of removing what some wanted to view as an embarrassment to the office. It was unfortunate for them that they chose not to let sleeping dogs lie, because things would have blown over on their own had they been left to do so. But then... hindsight is such a wonderful thing.

************

"Senator Walker, do you know why you're here this morning?" the Chairman asked as she seated herself behind the microphone. Brianna had not risen to show her respect for the Chairman's position when she entered the room, and she was more than a little put out by the lack of deference to her office. It was definitely time to put this woman in her place - show her how things were intended to run here. One couldn't get ahead if they didn't play by the rules like everyone else and after almost a year here, Brianna Walker should understand that fact. The Chairman peered over her glasses and frowned, hoping to intimidate her with her glare. Instead, Brianna snorted to keep from laughing aloud at her posturing, leaning back in her seat to regard the Chairman with humor.

"Of course. I am here because you have a stick up your ass and need to pick at something that is actually none of your business to keep your mind off it."

"Excuse me?!? You will not speak to me or anyone else involved in these proceedings with such disrespect, Senator. We have rules and processes that we follow and respect is key to that."

"Bullshit!" Brianna snapped with a vengeance, causing every person in the room to flinch. "You think because you were elected to office to SERVE," her emphasis on the word so strong, those listening could hear the capital letters in her voice, "that you're ENTITLED. Let me tell you something, Senator," sneering, "you're not *entitled* to anything. And you certainly haven't earned MY respect. You want me to excuse you?? There's no excuse for any of you, and trust me... I've looked."

"Senator Walker...."

"Nono... you don't get to talk now," holding up a hand and standing, walking around the table so she could lean against it to regard her accusers. Suddenly, the committee was thankful for two things - that they had decided to keep these actions closed and away from the press and that they had never faced Brianna Walker in court. It already felt as though she had eviscerated them thoroughly, and it was obvious from her stance that she hadn't even gotten started yet.

"You asked me a question - I'm quite willing to give you an answer. You brought me here with the intention of putting me in my place - making sure I towed a moral line *you* determined. You really think you can do that, Senator Gilbert? Rhetorical question," she instructed when the Chairman opened her lips to respond. "You don't want to answer yet. Because if you choose the wrong answer, there will be consequences."

"Are you threatening us, Senator Walker?"

"Not at all, Senator Gilbert. I'm simply explaining the truth to you. Surely you're acquainted with Newton's law - for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. I think you should be aware of what that reaction will be if you decide to pursue this course of action."

Gilbert held Brianna's eyes for a long moment, searching them for any hint of falsehood. When she found none, she leaned back in her chair as nonchalantly as she could manage and reached for the glass of water. When she noticed her shaking hand, she simply motioned for Brianna to continue instead.

"Thank you, Senator Gilbert," Brianna nodded graciously, her tone quite civil. "Before you start flinging spears and arrows at either me or Senator Tagherty for some sort of perceived moral shortcoming, let me suggest that you worry about your own business. You see, Charisma Tagherty is one in a lifetime - she's the real deal. Honest, forthright, stands by her convictions. Can the rest of you say the same? Don't answer - I already know. Every single one of you sold out a long time ago, and you're just *dying* to bring Senator Tagherty down to your level - it justifies your own actions.

But you can't - she's worked hard for the people of our state and it shows in the latest polls. Most of her constituents aren't concerned with us being a couple now - she was faithful to her husband for the duration of their marriage. In fact, despite the fact that she discovered her feelings for me, neither of us acted on that while she and Kent were married nor would we have. Because unlike you, Senator Danvers," pinning the woman with an intense stare, "I'm not a home wrecker. I was fully prepared to walk out of her life again. And unlike you, Senator York," watching the man flinch, "Charisma Tagherty believed that fidelity was part of the marriage vows she took."

Brianna smirked as she watched the faces that had entered the room with so much righteous indignation and accusation on their features, pale and turn ashen with each casually revealed secret.

"Should we talk about the dominatrix sessions you attend every Wednesday night, Senator Gilbert? With a woman who looks nothing like the husband you claim to have been faithful to for thirty-five years? Would you like to discuss Senator Morris' son's drug problems and the illegal strings he's pulled to keep him out of jail?"

She glanced around the room. "Would you like me to continue?" looking at the three committee members she hadn't yet called out and watching them shake their heads frantically in the negative. Brianna smirked again, and dropped her eyes to the floor in an effort to contain her laughter. If she'd been them, she wouldn't have wanted those particular bits of dirty laundry aired either. "I have files upon files filled with items like these - and not just for the people in this room." Brianna locked eyes with each of them one at a time, smiling in such a way that they were reminded of any number of Disney villains. Only this time, it was readily apparent that the villain was going to win any encounter they instigated. "It's amazing what you can find out about people when you know the right people."

"You have no proof."

"Are you sure? Are you willing to bet your career... risk jail time on that possibility? I assure you, Senator Thomas, I have proof that would destroy each and every one of you, and it would certainly be my pleasure to do so," the fire in her eyes lending credence to the truth of her words.

"What do you want, Senator Walker?" Gilbert finally asked resignedly.

"Aside from each of you becoming the leaders you were elected to be?" Brianna snorted. "You leave us alone. I don't care if you support Charisma or not, but you don't get to question her ethics or her morals anymore. Not one of you is in a position to do so - none of you has a moral leg to stand on, and if you think I'm going to stand by and let you persecute and obliterate her...."

"Anything else?"

"Yeah," Brianna replied. "If you try to isolate or undermine her or make things personal, I will ruin you - each and every one of you... one at a time. And I promise - you won't see it coming and each blow will be worse than the last. Not a threat - just a statement of fact. I don't like most of you - you are lower than the dirt on my shoes... wheeling and dealing and forgetting why you're really supposed to be here. Does that make me naïve?? Probably, but at least I sleep nights. Can you say the same?" Everyone reacted to that, no matter how minutely, and Brianna knew she'd made her point.

"I won't let you ruin what could be one of the brightest promises for the future of this great country with your petty bigotry and hatred. So drop your agendas against Senator Tagherty. I won't let you try to damage her further - she deserves better. She's actually earned the respect you demand."

The Chairman looked to her left, then her right before turning her attention back to Brianna. "We accept your terms, Senator Walker. Can we trust that you'll do nothing with the information you have?"

"Lady, I haven't given you a single reason *not* to trust me."

"Perhaps," Gilbert conceded, "but trust is something that is earned as well. Can you see why we might have a bit of difficulty doing so? Despite what you call it, you have threatened us all."

Brianna shrugged. "I suppose you could see it that way. But the fact remains that I have had this information in my possession since shortly after I arrived here and I haven't made it public - that should count for something." A pause as they absorbed the evidence she had just given them. "As long as you behave, so will I. I play to win, but I play fair... relatively speaking, of course," sneering at their disbelieving stares. Brianna gathered her papers together and slipped them back into her briefcase, then turned her attention back to the committee members that were watching her every move.

"A word of caution, ladies and gentlemen - do not test me, and don't think you can destroy the evidence I have on you. There are numerous copies of the charges I have laid before you today, and any sort of retaliatory action against me or Senator Tagherty will trigger the accusations to go public. Are we perfectly clear?" Every head bobbed slowly in acknowledgment. "Very well. If we're done here, I have a lunch date. Have a pleasant day."

Then Brianna turned and made her way out the door without pause. Only when she was gone and the portal closed completely behind her did the committee exhale and look at one another.

"Now what?" Senator Lopez asked. "Do we...?"

"We do nothing," Senator Gilbert announced as she straightened the papers in front of her.

"But...." from Senator Zimmerman.

"No buts," Gilbert bit out. "Can any of you afford to have your constituents know those kinds of things about you? Because I certainly can't. I'm just barely holding onto my seat as it is. And somehow, I believe Walker when she says there's evidence. We all know what kind of shadows lurk in her past, and even though we can't use it against her because she's maintained her distance from those connections, there is still every possibility that those connections work well for her when the need arises." Gilbert's pointed glances garnered her reluctant agreement from the rest. "Very well. This meeting is adjourned. I need a drink."

"Me too," piped up several of the others. Then they rose from their seats and headed out of the room.

************

The sky was clear and the air was hot as they walked hand in hand down the narrow, cobbled streets of the Old City towards Trevi Fountain. The first part of their holiday had gone so smoothly, and they had filled up several memory cards with pictures of the many places that they had already visited on their trip thus far. And of course, there were those instances that weren't captured by anything more than their memories - things too private to share with anyone beside one another.

The first time they'd made love in a Scottish castle that still bore the smudge marks of a thousand years worth of torchlight. Watching the sunrise wrapped around one another inside a blanket in a field as green as Brianna's eyes. Making love under the stars in a meadow in the Alps. Skinny dipping in a private cove they'd discovered while sailing around the islands in the Mediterranean. Dancing naked in the rain beneath the shadow of Mt. Vesuvius.

It had been all they had hoped for and more than they had dreamed and for the first time, Brianna felt whole. She turned to stare at Charisma as they neared the fountain, and cocked her head at the odd expression on Charisma's face. Charisma caught her and smiled bashfully. Brianna blushed, but grinned back at her.

"What?" Charisma demanded, her voice playful and husky.

"That's what I was going to ask. You had a strange look on your face."

"Did I?" chuckling when Brianna nodded pointedly. "I was thinking about how amazing this trip has been; about how the similarities make it seem familiar while the differences," squeezing Brianna's hand for emphasis, "make it feel new all over again. I was thinking how grateful I am that you were willing to give me one more chance, because I wouldn't have missed this for anything." They rounded the corner, and the noise from the fountain was almost overwhelming, so they hesitated for a moment to allow them time to adjust. Charisma loosened her hand from Brianna's, so she could cup her face and look into her eyes. "I was thinking how wonderful it is to be whole again. I love you, Brianna Walker."

Brianna clasped a hand around one of Charisma's and eased it from her face. She slipped a coin into it, and Charisma's face lit up in comprehension. They turned their backs to the fountain, then kissed the coins and tossed them over their shoulders, laughing while snapping pictures that they hoped would come out later. A kindly older man asked if they'd like him to take a picture of them together, and they nodded and handed him their cameras. He grinned and stepped back, and they turned towards one another with the fountain in the background. Brianna laced her fingers behind Charisma's head, threading them into the dark hair that hung loose. Charisma's hands naturally fell to Brianna's waist and they moved together until there was no space left between them.

"For the record," Brianna whispered as she tugged Charisma's head down, "I love you too." Then their lips met, and everything else became ambient noise. They didn't even notice the man taking pictures until he cleared his throat to separate them long enough to return their cameras. They blushed, but only pulled apart enough to receive them. He smiled and shook his head when they offered him money.

"Complimenti, bella signores," he said. "It was my pleasure," spoken in halting English. "Vi auguro tanto amore e felicità insieme sì?"

"Grazie," they answered simultaneously, leaning forward and kissing him on either cheek. He blushed but his smile grew, and with a wave of his hand, he disappeared back into the crowd of people wandering around the fountain. Brianna and Charisma stared after him for a moment, then turned back to each other with a smile. Charisma shifted her arms from Brianna's waist, and Brianna loosened her hold until they could clasp one another's hands.

"What do you say," Charisma asked as they slowly headed back down a narrow road, "to us going back to our hotel room for a bit?" She glanced at her watch. "It's late enough in the City that Kent and Adam will be up at least, if not actually awake," garnering a chuckle from Brianna. It was a running joke that every time they called home, it seemed to be meal time, bath time or 'God we just got out of bed' time. Even Kent had taken to laughing about it. "We could make our call, then maybe order a little room service?" leaning down to nuzzle Brianna's neck. Brianna responded by nipping at Charisma's earlobe and Charisma shivered. "A little food, a little wine, an afternoon of passionate sex?"

Brianna dropped Charisma hands and started walking briskly towards their hotel. Charisma frowned and halted, tilting her head and wondering what she'd said to make Brianna pull away from her. Just then, Brianna stopped moving away from her and turned to face Charisma with her hands on her hips and a wicked twinkle in her eye.

"Well??" she questioned, throwing her arms out. "Are you coming or do I have to start without you?" Charisma's eyes widened when she realized exactly what Brianna meant and she ran to catch up, snagging Brianna's hand as she ran by and pulling her along as they ran giggling towards their room. The natives just watched them go and shook their heads while their lips creased into little smiles. Americans were crazy without a doubt, but real love was always beautiful to see and they were glad for the glimpse into that kind of genuine happiness.

Brianna and Charisma never noticed - their focus was solely on one another. As it should have been... as it would always be.



Epilogue

"Wait," Charisma said as she leaned back into the pillows piled up behind her on the couch. "That's it?? THAT'S where you're ending our story??"

"Yep," Brianna drawled, that mischievous twinkle shining out of those pretty green eyes again.

"You can't stop there, Brianna Brianna. That wasn't our story ending... it was just the beginning, just like Es said it was."

"Who's the writer here?" Brianna challenged.

"Who's the President here?" Charisma retorted. "Pretty sure I outrank you."

"Out there, maybe," pointing towards the bedroom door. "In here, no, and here," holding up a familiar yellow tablet, "I'm the boss." Brianna laughed and Charisma crossed her arms over her chest and pouted.

"That's not fair," Charisma mumbled. "I'm the President," she reiterated.

"Maybe, but it is life and life is not always fair. This is just the introductory installment, Ri," Brianna told her with a tender smile. "I have more writing to do - you have more history to make. We have a life to continue living together, and I can't write about it until we do that."

"That was mean," Charisma grumbled.

"You still love me," Brianna insisted as she leaned forward to claim Charisma's lips. A knock on the door caused them to stop millimeters apart and they sighed and settled for a quick peck before Charisma called out, "Come in."

Adam poked his head in the door, shaking it as soon as he realized he'd interrupted them... again. For as long as he could remember, his moms had been in love, and though they tried to be prudent about sharing too much of their intimate life with the world outside the family and closest friends, they were naturally demonstrative and affectionate in the privacy of their home. More than once he'd caught them together in the middle of a kiss... or a hug... or very intimate conversation.

"Sorry," he murmured automatically. "I just wanted to let you know that Ame put Dad upstairs - he wanted to be close to the gym. He dropped his luggage off and headed out to an appointment." Adam shrugged to indicate he didn't know anything else. "Gramma called a few minutes ago - something about Es' hot chocolate recipe?" Adam shrugged. "You'll probably want to call her back... she wasn't real clear. Anyway, I'm headed out to pick up Jenna so we can get to the Natural History Museum on time. Do you need anything before I go?"

Charisma rose from the couch she been snuggled up on with Brianna and wrapped her arms around her nearly grown son. Where had the time gone? she wondered as she straightened his bowtie and brushed at the sleeve of his tuxedo. He hugged her gently, then did the same with Brianna. "Just be careful and ask the Andrews for copies of their pictures please since I can't go take my own without causing a national incident apparently," Charisma instructed slightly aggrieved. "And be home early - you know how your Gramma is during the holidays and she'll be here soon. She'll expect to see you first thing tomorrow regardless of how long your winter formal goes on tonight."

"Yes ma'am," he acknowledged, then slipped out of the room before she could caution him any more. Charisma turned back to Brianna.

"Well, well," she drawled softly. "It seems we have the house to ourselves at the moment. And what do you know? My work is done for the day. If you're really finished for the moment," nodding her head at the legal pad currently discarded on the table, "what do you say to calling the kitchen? A little food, a little wine and an evening of wild lovemaking?"

Brianna smirked and began undressing Charisma as she urged her gently towards the massive bed. "I think, Madame President, you've made me an offer I can't refuse."

And from somewhere above two Angels smiled in satisfaction as they stood sentinel while Brianna and Charisma consecrated their love once more.

THE END
11/08-04/09
03/10-10/11




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