Forever Love by Fanofhearts

'Cause the heart won't lie
Sometimes life gets in the way
But there's one thing that won't change
I know I've tried
The heart won't lie

September 11th, 2001 was the day of hell for Ziva. Jenny had been brought on as an American agent in Tel Aviv working some under cover ops for Mossad, for the past seven months her and Ziva had been living in a cramped Mossad owned apartment. It was heaven for both especially Ziva who had never lived away from her mother or her father in her life. She was in love and working covert operations for her country. Life was good. But that all changed when the United States was hit by the suicide bombers. Overnight their life was altered, word came over that Jenny was needed back in the States immediately; she would leave the next day. For Ziva it felt like her insides were being torn out. She couldn't breathe, she felt sick, and she was desperately waiting to wake up from the hell that had so quickly become her life. Jenny wasn't much better, she had pictured her life here, in Tel Aviv. The thought of returning to the states felt wrong.

"What are we going to do?" Jenny whispered, her face buried against Ziva's neck, her favorite spot. They were standing in the small bedroom; Jenny had just hung up with her director finalizing her flight plan back to the US.

"I-I do not know. What are the chances they will reassign you?"

"Not good, not with the mess this has all become." Jenny shook her head picturing the images of the burning Pentagon and the thousands that had died in the buildings. "I don't know what is going to happen but it will take a while for all this to get sorted out. They are talking war."

Ziva nodded and pulled back, she ran her hands through Jenny's loose hair, "Promise me we will not lose this. I cannot lose you Jen."

"You won't, I'll call, you'll call, we can e-mail. Maybe you can take a two week leave and come to the States. I'll show you around the capital, maybe I could get off and we could travel west. I've always wanted to see Yellow Stone. It will be just us, no job, and no security threat."

Ziva moaned, "That sounds wonderful." She sighed. "I wish we could go back to Giza today, it could be just us."

"We don't have enough time." Jenny's fingers began to unbutton the shirt Ziva had haphazardly thrown on in the chaos that greeted them that morning. "Right now, I want to memorize every inch of your body." Jenny pushed her back onto the bed before climbing on top of her.

Ziva grabbed her hands, "Jen, just remember..."

Jenny felt her eyes sting, "Please don't Ziva, not now, just let me love you." She dropped her mouth to the skin she had exposed.

Even though it was only 10 miles from the apartment to the air field the trip took well over an hour with traffic. They were silent in the cab, Jenny leaving heavy against Ziva's side, tears trickling down her face. Ziva would never forget that day. She had helped Jenny pack, after they had showered both seem to struggle to form sentences, the reality of the situation was beginning to set in. They waited, hands clasped till the cabbie knocked on the door. The sun was setting; its red and orange hues sinking into to the distance again reminded Ziva so much of the American's hair. She squeezed Jenny's shoulders and kissed her cheek. "I love you." She whispered. The cab stopped in front of the tarmac and Ziva reluctantly opened the door.

~@~

Ziva hadn't felt the gut wrenching feeling since, she had prayed that she would never feel it again but there it was. She swallowed hard against the taste of bile in her throat. "What?" It came out as a choked whisper.

"I'm dying Ziva."

"How, what...are you sure, I do not-"

She felt a hand clamp over her mouth. She looked up into Jenny's moist blue eyes. "Please." She whispered.

Ziva pulled her to her hard, holding on as tight as she could. "Tell me."

Jenny buried her face in Ziva's neck, she loved her smell. It was earthy and sweet, it always calmed her. "Do you remember when I dropped that wine bottle?" She felt Ziva nod into her neck. "I told Ducky what happened, I just started shaking and the bottle flew out of my hand. I couldn't stop. I also told him about the headaches." She felt Ziva stiffen and she gently kissed her neck. "He ran some test and found high levels of creatine kinase. He did an MRI and confirmed it is a brain tumor." She felt Ziva squeeze her harder, she nuzzled her face against the ribbed tank top taking solace in the comfort the younger woman was offering. "He sent me to his specialist in Boston, we met briefly and I went back up at the beginning of last week to meet with him to see if they could operate." She felt her heart beat speed up thinking of being in his office. "They...they did a lot of blood work and scans. I-I had to drink all of this horrible junk that made me so sick." Her tears were falling faster now it was all she could do to keep talking. "It's malignant Ziva." She gasped, a choking sob ripped from her throat. It was the first time she had said it out loud. "I'm dying."

Ziva continued to rub Jenny's back, she made shushing noises, gently kissed her hair, she did everything one was supposed to do to comfort a loved one but it was not enough. She pushed Jenny back and wiped her tears, "Jen, what about surgery? We can go get a second opinion, this is not the end."

Jenny shook her head and stood up. She walked to the end table where a box of Kleenexes sat. She wiped her tears and turned back to look at Ziva. "He brought in another doctor; they are the leading brain surgeons in the country. The tumor is flat, the surgery might buy me some time but it would most likely turn me into a vegetable. I don't want to live like that."

"But Jenny, there has to be-"

"No," Jenny held up her hand to stop Ziva's approach. "There is not. I've spent the last 7 days with these people, looking at the tests, the statistics. I'm done. I want to live out my final days in peace."

Ziva froze. She looked at the woman in front of her. This beautiful woman who had come into her life so unexpectedly and gently changed her life. "But, I love you." She whispered her arms felt useless hanging limply at her sides.

"I know." Jenny could no longer look into Ziva's devastated face. She turned towards the window and looked out at the sky. She could just make out the moon between the buildings. She felt Ziva's arms slide around her waist and she leaned back. "I'm leaving NCIS. I'll turn in my resignation on Monday." She swallowed hard. "They think two months at the most. Driving in a few weeks will be out of the question; even now they frown on it." She felt the tears begin to slide down her face. "I've arranged for a nurse around the clock so I can stay in my house. When I get bad Ziva I don't want you or anyone there."

"No."

"Ziva..." She turned in her arms. She let her hands slid up Ziva's arms to rest on her shoulders taking in the warm, smooth feeling of her skin. One hand picked up the Star of David pendent and played with it.

"No. I'm not leaving you Jenny. I love you, I will be there."

"But work your job..."

"I am not going anywhere. I will put in for a leave of absence."

"Ziva-"

"I will be there, I love you." She began to kiss down Jenny's neck as her hands reached for the tie on her sweats. "I love you." With one tug the pants hit the floor and Ziva helped her step out of them. She felt numb; her mind was still trying to wrap its way around the thought of Jenny dying. She didn't look sick, she just looked exhausted. Her hand slowly slipped down to gently trace the tattoo that stood out against the pale skin of Jenny's thigh. She dropped to her knees and kissed the rough patch of skin. She smiled remember when they first got the tattoos.

~@~

Minutes and hours and years may go by.
But my heart knows nothing of time.
So don't cry, just keep me right there.
In your dreams.
And hold on to these words of mine

Cairo 2003

Ziva had not heard from Jenny in over three weeks. She was beyond worried. They had stayed in touch as much as possible with the distance and the hostel situation between their countries at the moment. Last year she had managed to get to the states for three days. All thoughts of taking a full vacation flew out of their minds the second they saw each other. They never left Jenny's house. Both had been able to call or e-mail at least twice a week until three Monday's ago. Jenny hadn't said anything about a mission or being away for a great period of time. Ziva wiped the sweat from her brow. It was hot, July in Cairo was hell. She hadn't been back since Jenny. Ziva had learned a lot in the past 2 years. She was now a junior agent with Mossad and was to complete a drop mission in the city. She got sent in because she was a woman and would not draw attention to herself by walking through the market. She was to pick up a package from an American informant and return to headquarters. As she neared the drop site her eyes caught sight of a red lock of hair. It was just enough to stop her forward motion. The person behind her bumped into her pushing her forward into the woman she was staring at. The woman turned and Ziva's heart stopped. "Jenny?"

"Ziva?"

They froze, staring at each other, for one second Ziva was back in front of the American embassy all those years ago. The smell brought her back to the present. The sulfur made her nose tingle she turned and saw the smoke. She quickly reached out pulling Jenny towards the other side of the street and knocking her to the ground behind an olive vender. The sound of the explosion made her ears ring, the last thing she remembered was looking down into Jenny's blue eyes thinking 'she is safe'.

When Ziva came to she was in a hotel room. Jenny was pacing back and forth at the foot of the bed. "Jenny?"

"Oh thank God!" Jenny stepped over to the bed taking Ziva's hand in hers. "I was so worried."

"How long have I been out?" She asked groggily. She reached back to the area where her head was throbbing the worst and felt a bump. "Ow."

"Shhh, just lay back, it's been about thirty minutes. I was just getting ready to call a doctor."

Ziva nodded, "I probably have a concussion."

"I'm sure. What the hell where you thinking Ziva? Pulling me like that and putting yourself into the line of fire! You could have been killed! Don't you ever do that again do you hear me?"

Ziva just stared at her unblinking, "Could you please lower your voice, my head hurts."

Jenny dropped her eyes and blushed. "I'm sorry, it's just...this is not how I expected our reunion to go. I could have lost you Ziva."

Ziva shook her head, "Never" She pulled Jenny down on the bed." I must ask, what in the world are you doing here? You stopped e-mailing I was worried your cell phone goes straight to voicemail."

"I'm sorry. This mission came up quickly. I've been bounced all over North Africa. This mission became available and I jumped at it. I was afraid they wouldn't let me have it because it is a probie mission but I can be very convincing."

A slow smile spread across Ziva's face. "I know. Being that I can't really sit up, could you please lean down and kiss me."

Jenny laughed, it was a wonderful sound to Ziva's ears, "I've missed you." She covered her lips with hers in a series of short kisses. "We have three days."

"That seems to be our lucky number."

Jenny and Ziva had both checked in with their agencies, Jenny had one more drop the next morning and Ziva was off for two days because of her concussion. After a light lunch the both laid on the bed catching up. Jenny was again in shorts and a tank top leaving her legs and arms free for exploration. Ziva's fingers gently played over the scar on the inside of Jenny's left thigh. "You got very lucky with this." She whispered in the quiet room.

"So you've told me many many times." Jenny smiled nuzzling her face into Ziva's neck. "It's not a very happy scar for me. It brings up bad memories."

Ziva raised her eye brow, "When are scars happy?"

Jenny smirked and turned her wrist over to show Ziva. "Remember that night after the dinner party you dragged me to?" On the underside of her wrist was a faint white scar, they had both had too much to drink that night and in their frenzy to get their clothes off Ziva had tripped and knocked Jenny's into edge of the kitchen counter the impact had sliced open her wrist.

Ziva laughed, "Okay, I will give you that one," She had an idea, "What if we changed that?"

Jenny pulled back and looked at her in the dim light of the room, "How?"

"Come on." She sat up slowly; she still had a faint headache.

"Ziva..."

"Trust me."

An hour later they were in a dingy back room of a shop, the smell of acid and incense was heavy in the air. Jenny was chewing her lip while Ziva was speaking to the shop clerk in rapid Arabic. She handed the older woman some money and grabbed Jenny's hand.

"Ow. Ow. Ow. OW!" Jenny's head shot up off the cot she was laying on. Her legs were spread and the older woman from the front desk was between them injecting ink into her skin. "Why did I let you talk me into this?"

Ziva was in the same position reading a magazine. "Because you love me."

"You do know this is forbidden in your religion."

Ziva laughed, "I do a lot of things that are forbidden in my religion." She waggled her eyebrows at Jenny which earned her an eye roll.

It took about an hour and they were again walking down the street hand in hand. It was late and there were not many people around. "How does it feel?"

Jenny frowned. "It's numb right now."

"Good, tomorrow it will itch like no other."

Jenny laughed pulling Ziva into their hotel. "Would you mind scratching it for me then?"

~@~

The room was only lit by the street light outside of Ziva's bedroom. Jenny lay tucked into Ziva's shoulder as their hearts slowed down. Ziva's fingers were gently tracing the word that now covered the scar on Jenny's thigh; 'ahavat' was scrolled in Hebrew. It matched the one on the inside of Ziva's own thigh.

"I love you." Ziva whispered into Jenny's hair.

"I love you too."

"Please tell me this is all a dream Jenny." Ziva pushed herself up to look down at her lover.

Jenny shook her head, sobs rocked her body. "Ziva, I'm so scared."

Ziva froze; in the almost ten years that she'd known Jenny she had never heard her admit she was scared. She had rarely seen her cry; even when she broke her arm in an op in Latvia she didn't cry a tear. She clutched the other woman as Jenny's nails left red streaks down Ziva's back, but she didn't care. "Do you remember our dreams? Do you remember asking me to get you a job here so we could be together? We would settle down, buy a house outside of town, have children, and maybe get a dog. Do you remember Ziva? I'm so sorry for this mess, the only way I could guarantee getting you here was to take the Directors job. If I had known what I know now I would have never taken it. God, we could have both left, we could have been happy Ziva. I'm so sorry."

"Hey, hey, hey, stop. We are happy!" Ziva lifted her tear stained face up to look into her eyes. "Do not regret what you worked so hard for Jen. You are the first female director of a government agency! You are damn good at it too. Without that job we might not have gotten here, me leaving Mossad when I was young was not an option and you love your job. You are so good at it, please do not regret that." She gently kissed the tears that were running down Jenny's cheeks.

"I wanted children with you Ziva, I wanted a life."

"You have me now Jenny. Everything I have is yours."

"I don't want to die Ziva, God, I don't want to die." Her sobs made it impossible for her to speak. Ziva let her cry, she held onto her tightly. Silent tears trickled down her face; she would not let her love go down without a fight. She began making plans in her head, she still had many connections overseas, someone would be able to help Jenny, and they had to.

TBC...