The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There's so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

“Sam, get back over here!” Xan ordered, calling back the excited blonde woman who had gotten ahead of the group. ‘We should have let her out of the quarters…’ the dark haired Guardian mused as Sam ran back, a bright smile lighting her face up. She was beginning to see that keeping the blonde cooped up in her home hadn’t been such a good idea after all, whether it was for her own safety or not.

“Xan! Xan! Do we get to ride the shuttle? I’ve only ridden it once but it was really fun. I don’t think I’ve ever gone that fast in my life.” the younger woman chattered, reminding Xan of a young child. In fact, that’s what Sam reminded the older woman of most of the time. Sometimes, Xan forgot that Sam was an adult since she certainly didn’t act like one. Then there were times when Sam said something that made so much sense that she seemed much more experienced than she truly was; even if what she said was said with the innocence of a child. The older woman wondered what it was like to be so innocent but still be as wise as the girl beside her. “Where are we going, Xan?” Sam suddenly asked, changing the subject before Xan could answer the first question. Xan knew that Sam loved to talk, but she usually managed to stay on one topic longer than thirty seconds. She chalked the sudden topic changes up to the excitement the blonde woman felt. Ever since Xan had told her they’d be going somewhere else to stay for awhile, the blonde hadn’t been able to hide how excited she was to be getting out of the confines of Xan‘s home.

“Somewhere safe.” was the older woman’s vague answer. Sam rolled her eyes at the stoic Guardian.

“Snildians…” she muttered under her breath, earning a questioning glance from Xan. She blushed, not realizing she had spoken aloud, and in Solarian to boot.

“Oh come on Xan. We all wanna know where we’re going. All you’ve told us is that it’s in the old city.” Ilarius said, almost as curious as the blonde woman. That curiosity was also tinged with fear. He was worried about how Xan would act on her old turf. Despite all the good that she had done, there was still a chance that Xan could fall into her old ways in a familiar environment. ‘You can take the woman out of the streets but you can’t take the streets out of the woman.’ he remembered telling Henry once.

“And that’s all you need to know.” the dark haired woman told him, pulling the blonde man out of his thoughts.

Truthfully, there were two reasons she hadn’t told anyone where they were going. Ever since the night of the attack, Xan knew there was a traitor amongst the seven of them. Only those living in the quarters knew the code to lock and unlock the door. Therefore, they were the only ones that could lock and unlock it, both from the inside and the outside. At the moment, Xan trusted none of the others and she wasn’t going to risk revealing their destination until she absolutely had to. That way, when they arrived, they wouldn’t have a squad of enemy soldiers waiting to get the drop on them.

Another factor that kept her from telling everyone was the fact that she wasn’t even sure she had a place for them to stay. It had been ten long years since she had been to her mother’s inn and she doubted the other woman would ever want to see her again. Not after what she had become and how she got her brother killed. Before she had the chance to dwell on the past, she noticed that Sam was beginning to get ahead of them again.

“Sam, didn’t I tell you to stay close?” she called, getting the curious woman’s attention. ’Definitely should have let her outside more.’ she thought with an amused smile as Sam hurried back.

“Sorry, I’m just so…” Sam thought for a moment, trying to think of the correct word.

“Excited?” Alicia provided. Sam nodded at the blue haired teenager before turning back to Xan.

“So do we get to ride the shuttle?” she asked again, remembering that her protector hadn’t answered her the first time she asked. The dark haired woman nodded, making green eyes light up with a smile, which in turn made Xan smile. “Wow. Do you think a lot of people will be on it this early?” she asked, her eyes twinkling with curiosity. Another thing Xan noticed about Sam was that she liked to be around people, unlike herself. Xan figured that the reason for this was because of how Sam was brought back from the dead; no memories and a profound feeling of loneliness. That was the one thing the blonde never liked to talk about.

“Probably not. Normal people like, sleep at this time.” came the grumpy response from a still cranky Moira. It was obvious that Sam and Moira had a shared hatred for early mornings… or just mornings in general. Only Sam’s excitement for what was going on around her held off her usually gruff morning attitude. Unfortunately, this wasn’t the case with Moira. “Why did we have to leave at four in the morning? The sun isn‘t even out yet.” the pink haired girl asked. “Couldn’t we have gone with the boys?”

“Weren’t you listening last night?” Alicia asked. Moira shot her a glare before shaking her head.

“Someone kept stealin’ my cigs.” she reminded her friend, who immediately had a sheepish smile on her face.

“Those things are bad for you. Besides, I thought you were quitting?”

“It’s been pretty stressful lately, ’kay?” Moira defended herself. All five members of the group knew what she was referring to. Ever since the attack the week before, everyone could feel the tension in the air and the three Guardians had pushed the four Protectors harder than ever. It was a miracle if they ever got a break from training. In Xan’s mind, they should have been more prepared and she was going to make sure they were ready for the next time an attack happened.

“If you say so.” Alicia sighed before running a hand through her hair. “It’s not like we could see the sun if it was out anyways…” she grumbled crankily.

“Ooh! Ooh! We’re there!” Sam squealed in excitement as she clapped her hands, dragging the group out of its melancholy mood. A small smile appeared on Xan’s face as she realized that they were in fact in front of the shuttle station. “Where’s it at?” Sam asked, not seeing the metal box that she had ridden in with the scientist so long ago in the dark tunnel.

“Hold your horses Sam. It’ll be here soon.” Moira told her as she pulled a stick of gum out of her pocket. Alicia was right; smoking was bad for her. She gave a mental sigh as she popped the chewy stick into her mouth, not seeing the blue haired girl’s triumphant grin.

“But… I don’t have any horses. Do you?” Sam informed her, a confused look on her face. She heard Xan chuckle and immediately felt her face heat up in a blush. She had definitely just said something stupid again. This language was just so confusing! ‘And what in the world is a horse?’ she wondered, choosing not to voice her question. It’d most likely get her laughed at again.

“Just wait Sam. The shuttle should be here soon.” Alicia helpfully informed the girl, happily explaining what her friend meant.

“Oh… Well why couldn’t she just say that?” the blonde muttered under her breath, feeling like an idiot.

“Don’t worry about it.” a familiar voice whispered in her ear. Sam looked up at her dark haired friend and smiled. The unguarded blue eyes captured her attention, a strange feeling of familiarity coming over her and catching her off guard. There was something about those eyes that she felt she should know. Before she could analyze the feeling, the walls went back up and Sam was left wondering if they had really been down in the first place.

“Thank you.” she mouthed with a smile before turning back to the tunnel as the shuttle pulled in noisily. The group of five quietly stepped into the advanced transport, the doors sliding closed behind them.

The inside of the shuttle was almost completely empty when they stepped inside, only a few other early risers accompanying the five travelers. Sam took in the surroundings with a small smile. There was one man who was holding onto one of the metallic poles in the middle of the box instead of sitting in one of the many seats. A few rows back was an old couple, both the man and the woman having strange red markings across their faces that were unfamiliar to Sam. She’d have to ask Xan about them later. Seated in the row of seats opposite the old couple, there was a teenaged boy. Or at least Sam was pretty sure it was a boy. He was covered in orange and black fur and his cat-like ears were at the top of his head, rather than on the sides. Sam felt an urge to go over and stroke the soft-looking fur but decided against it when she noticed that the boy had cat-like paws rather than hands.

A wisp of a memory pulled at her mind when she saw the paws. She suddenly felt a sharp pain in her chest that made her reach out and grab Xan for support while her other hand went to her heart. Luckily the shuttle had just started moving at that moment and she was able to use that as an excuse.

“I’m sorry… I’m not used to being jerked forward like that.” she told the dark haired woman when she saw the look of concern on Xan‘s face. “Really, I’m alright. It just scared me, is all.” she assured her friend when Xan didn’t look away. The tall warrior seemed to accept this and nodded.

“Come on. Let’s go find us a seat.” Xan said, not bothering to pull her arm away from Sam as she walked down the aisle in the middle of the seats.

“Like that should be hard to do. Everyone else is at home sleepin’.” Moira mumbled while chewing her gum. She boredly snapped it, earning an annoyed glare from Ilarius.

“Stop complaining and sleep on the way to the city.” he told her as he took a seat closest to the aisle towards the front of the shuttle. Moira muttered something under her breath before sitting down in the seat just in front of the furry teenager, Alicia sitting beside her. It wasn’t long before Moira was lifting the armrest on her side and using the two seats as a small impromptu bed, her legs curled up to her chest. The blue haired girl chose to engage in conversation with the feline like teenager behind her.

Xan allowed herself to be dragged along by Sam to the seats closest to the small windows.

“Sam, you’re not going to be able to see anything. There isn’t much scenery when you travel underground.” she told the younger woman, who had her face pressed against the glass. Green eyes turned to face her and Xan felt an odd sense of déjà vu as she looked into the curious orbs.

“Moira mentioned the sun though…” Xan chuckled and shook her head.

“Sam, the closest we have to the sun in this city is the artificial lighting and pictures.” she told her. The blonde still stared at her, waiting for her to elaborate. Xan sighed. She really hated trying to explain things to people. “About twenty years ago, this city was created for the rich. It was meant to keep out the riff-raff of the streets. In reality, this is a city built inside a large building that goes on for miles. Of course, it’s a building without windows, seeing as that would increase the chances of the trash sneaking inside.” Xan told her. “So, there is no natural sunlight or plants. People will sacrifice a lot to keep themselves safe. Understand?” The blonde nodded in understanding before turning back to the window. She had been hoping to see what this ‘sun’ looked like.

“Xan… do you think Solarius had a sun?” she asked her darker companion. Xan raised an eyebrow and she blushed. “Sorry. It’s just, I can remember bits and pieces, but not a whole lot. I mean, I remember the language just fine, obviously, and a lot of the history…”

“But nothing important to you?” Xan asked. Sam just nodded, keeping her gaze focused on the lights whirring by outside the window.

“I don’t remember what it looks like, what kind of creatures roamed its surface, or what my family and friends were like.” she said sadly. “I don’t even remember what I was like…” she added on in a whisper. “What if… What if I’m not supposed to be like this? What if how I’m living now is a lie and goes against how I was before?” she asked, her voice cracking. She wanted to know who she had been so badly. “What good is knowing my name if I don’t even the know the person behind it?” she muttered angrily.

Long moments ticked by as Xan tried to think of something to say. The only time she had ever seen Sam so vulnerable was when she was asleep, lost in the throes of a nightmare. Even when the girl had first been reawakened, she had shown determination and stubbornness. Now though… she seemed like a lost child looking for something she had lost and desperately wanted back but had no way of knowing how to find it.

Before she knew what she was doing, Xan’s hand reached for Sam’s chin and gently made the blonde look at her, her icy heart nearly breaking in two when she saw the unshed tears there.

“Sam, you’ll get your memories back. It will just take some time.” she assured her younger companion, all the while half-hoping that the young woman never got her memories back since she had seen what some of those memories were.

That seemed to be the release for the floodgates and before Xan knew it, she had a crying blonde savior in her arms as sobs racked the smaller frame. Xan awkwardly wrapped her arms around the blonde, not sure of what to do. Her instincts seemed to take over as her hand gently began rubbing the smaller woman’s back.

“Shh… It’s alright Sam.” she cooed in the blonde’s ear quietly. ‘Well it seems my tough-as-nails image just got shattered.’ she thought as she noticed Ilarius and Alicia looking back at them with a grin on their faces. She glared at her two comrades, making them both go back to what they had been doing as they tried to suppress the smiles they had.

After a few minutes, the crying subsided and instead of sniffles, Xan heard soft snores coming from her blonde friend. Blue eyes looked down and she couldn’t quite stop a smile from forming at the sight of Sam sleeping in the crook of her shoulder. The smile turned into a frown when she realized how uncomfortable that had to be with the armrest in between the two of them. She carefully lifted the blonde’s head up for a moment before moving the armrest. She then gently lowered Sam’s head down to her lap, giving the younger woman a much more comfortable sleeping position.

“Sleep tight, Velcro.” she said quietly, moving a strand of stray strawberry blonde hair.

“Dun’t call me that…” the blonde sighed sleepily, somehow hearing Xan’s words. Xan blinked, hoping she hadn‘t woken her younger friend up from a much needed rest. She waited a few moments more for the girl to speak again before she realized that Sam was talking in her sleep. ‘That isn’t surprising.’ she thought with a chuckle as she felt her own eyelids drooping, the rhythmic sound of Sam’s breathing along with the repetitive sounds of the shuttle putting her to sleep. Just before she drifted off into a dreamless slumber, the dark haired warrior could have sworn she heard Sam say ‘Love you, Xan.’

Ilarius took in the sight of the sleeping couple and, for the first time in a long time, felt at ease. When the mission had first started, he thought without a doubt that Xan’s hatred for Sam would put the young woman’s safety at risk. Taking in this scene, though, it was hard to believe that the dark-haired warrior had ever pushed the blonde away. He was glad that Xan was able to see past her hatred.

Of course, that happiness also had a bit of jealousy tainting it. The moment he laid eyes on Sam, he felt as if she had taken his heart away. He had been hoping to create a relationship with the young woman, even if it was a bit awkward for a Guardian to be dating their charge. Of course, it wasn’t like Sam knew they were trying to protect her so she could hopefully save the world.

‘I wonder how she would feel if she found that out…’ the blonde man pondered as he watched the blonde sigh in contentment. It would most likely ruin her friendship with Xan. ‘Idiot! It’d ruin her relationship with you too!’ He chided himself for being so stupid before looking back at the couple. ‘I could just ask her out on a date. I could tell Xan I’d be showing her around the city to see the sights.’ he mused as he traced the cherubic face of the blonde woman with his eyes. He let out a sarcastic snort. ‘Yeah, like Xan will leave Sam’s side for a moment.’ A few moments went by and a light bulb went off in Ilarius’ mind. “Henry…” he muttered to himself as he thought of the perfect solution for his dilemma.

He casually drew his eyes away from the picture perfect scene and gazed ahead, a smile forming on his face. Despite the fact that he had had to wake up before the natural sun came up, the day was beginning to look positive. He’d have a date before the end of the night and he might be able to make Henry’s and Xan’s day look pretty bright too by setting them up. It was going to be a good day indeed.

‘What in the world?’ Xan thought sleepily as a ringing noise pulled her out of her pleasant dream. It took her a few moments to open her eyes and a few moments more to focus. She looked down to where the ringing was coming from and noticed her watch blinking in time with the rings. It took a few seconds but her mind finally registered that someone was calling her. The built in caller ID flashed Henry’s name and number instead of the time and she remembered that she had told Henry to call when he was ready to leave.

She quickly pulled her headset out of the inside pocket of her denim jacket and slipped it on, pressing the button to accept the call. She let out a frustrated breath when she realized she had been to slow and the line was already dead. She quickly scrolled through numbers on her small contact list stored in her watch until she found Henry’s number. It wasn’t long before she heard the familiar ringing of the phone in her ear. A few moments later and Henry’s voice came on the line.

“Xan! I thought something happened to you guys. I tried calling three times and you didn’t answer.”

“Sorry Henry,” she apologized, fighting back a yawn, “I fell asleep.” The line was silent for a few moments and she wondered if her friend had hung up on her. “Henry?” she asked, waiting for an answer.

“Sorry. I’m still trying to comprehend the fact that you took a nap.” he teased her. “And in public, no less.” Xan could hear his repressed chuckle and she felt a scowl come on her face. “Oh, don’t you dare give me that look.” her friend said over the line, somehow able to tell what she was doing.

“I’m not that predictable, am I?” she asked, wiping the scowl from her face and replacing it with her usual mask of indifference.

“Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.” Henry chuckled before turning serious again. “Look, the other two guys and I are on the next shuttle. Where should we meet up at?” Xan was quiet for a moment. She hadn’t thought of that. She was still trying to figure out if they’d be able to stay with her mother or not. “Xan?”

“Do you remember the first place we met?” she asked, coming to a decision. “We’ll meet up two blocks from there.” she told him.

“Alright Xan. See you then.” her friend said before hanging up. Once the dial tone sounded in her ear, Xan pulled the headset off and stuck it back inside her jacket. No longer feeling tired, she took in her surroundings. Alicia was still awake and Moira had decided to join the land of the living. They both were chatting amiably with the tiger patterned Were-cat. Ilarius was awake as well and she had to wonder if she was the only one who fell asleep. The soft snoring coming from her lap brought her eyes downward, where she found a still sleeping Sam resting her head on her jean covered lap.

‘She really does look ridiculous in my clothes.’ Xan decided as she took in the blonde’s ruffled appearance as she slept. She was wearing a simple white t-shirt that fell a little ways passed her waist and hung off her body loosely. Yet the girl insisted on wearing it, even though Moira had clothes that fit her much better. The grey sweat pants had to be rolled up a few times before she could walk without stepping on the ends since Xan was considerably taller than the blonde. The red and white sneakers were her own, given to her by the perverted scientist that had given her the rest of her… outfits. One thought back to the skimpy ensembles and Xan shuddered.

‘Thank the Gods we got rid of all those.’ she thought as she brought her attention away from Sam and back to those around her. More people had gotten on so the shuttle was only half empty. ‘Must be pretty late in the morning then.’ Xan mused as she lifted her wrist up again and checked the time. The watch said 11:43. ‘Glad we took the shuttle. We’d be walking all day if we didn’t.’ Another thought came to Xan. ‘Since when do I sleep in this late?’ she wondered, trying to remember the last time she had slept in. A small whimpering sound and the feel of something tugging at the hem of her shirt brought Xan out of her thoughts. Sam was going through yet another nightmare and Xan wondered if they would ever stop.

She waited a few more seconds before gently shaking the blonde‘s shoulders. She wasn’t quite ready for the younger woman to shoot up so fast and the end result was her getting a large helping of Sam’s forehead against her nose.

“Oh Xan! I’m so sorry. Are you okay?” Sam asked, trying to ignore the stars she was seeing.

“It’s alright. I’m fine.” the dark haired woman lied as she tried to keep her eyes from tearing up. Sam frowned, knowing she wasn’t being honest with her. “I said I’m okay.” she assured her blonde friend. Sam still didn’t look convinced but she dropped the issue anyways.

“How much longer until we get… where ever it is we’re going?” she asked as she lowered her legs to the floor and faced forward.

“We should be there in another hour or so.” Xan replied as she absent-mindedly rubbed her now sore nose.

“Wow. Does it always take this long to get there?”

“Well, it depends on how many stops the shuttle has to make. It’s usually faster and easier than walking though.” the dark haired woman told her. “What? Not enjoying the ride?”

“Oh no, I’m loving it.” Sam shook her head vehemently, making Xan chuckle. “I’m just more excited to see what else is out there. Not that I didn’t enjoy staying in your home, Xan.”

“I understand.” Xan smiled, earning a smile back from the blonde.

“Xan, when we get where we’re going, are you going to keep teaching the others?” The dark haired woman raised an eyebrow at the question. “Well um… I kind of want to keep learning.” Sam explained when she saw the look. ‘I want to be able to fight like you.’ she added on mentally, remembering the helplessness she felt when she saw Xan fighting against the man with the weapon. Despite all she had learned so far, she wanted to learn more so she’d be able to help her friend.

“Yes, training will continue even when we get to the old city.” Xan assured the girl.

“What’s the old city like?” Sam asked, her curious nature beginning to emerge once again.

“It’s… different.” Xan replied cryptically, making her smaller companion frustrated.

“What kind of answer is that?” Sam huffed, crossing her arms and pouting slightly.

“The only kind of answer you’re going to get.” The dark-haired woman chuckled before ruffling Sam’s hair. The blonde glared at her.

“I guess I’ll just have to see when we get there.” she pouted with a sigh before sinking into her seat. A few moments went by before the curiosity got the better of her. “Xaaaaan! Will you pleeaaaase tell me what it’s like?” she pleaded, reminding Xan of the talk they had had the day of the break in. That was a discussion she would never have again.

“Nope. You’re just going to have to wait.” Xan told her as she shook her head, enjoying putting the little blonde through this prolonged suffering.

“Fine. See if I talk to you anymore.” Sam grumbled, turning to look out the window instead of at Xan.

‘Three… Two… One…’ Xan mentally counted down.

“Xan, what’s the sun like?” Sam asked, already forgetting that she had just told Xan she wasn’t going to talk to her anymore.

“I guess you’ll just have to find out for yourself.” She chuckled at the face the blonde made.

“Did anyone ever tell you you’re not good at conversations?”.

“Yes, quite a few people actually.”

“You’re joking, right?”

“That would require a sense of humor.” Xan deadpanned.

“A what?” Sam asked, not quite sure what her taller friend was talking about. Xan just shook her head. “Never mind. I don’t want to know.” she said, trying to retract her question. ‘I’ll just look it up later.’ she decided as she went back to staring out the window.

It was almost 1:00 when the shuttle docked at the station. The group of five were the only ones that got off the transport before it took off again. The docking bay was almost as empty as the shuttle had been in the morning. The only people that walked along the area with them was personnel and security. Sam somehow managed to keep any questions she had to herself, not wanting to interrupt the eerie silence.

They approached two sets of stairs, reminding the blonde of Xan’s quarters. Only, these stairs moved, one set going up and the other going back down. She had learned from the computer that these were called escalators and that very few places had them anymore. Apparently, they had become obsolete when the new cities were built. Sam stared at the moving steps apprehensively before taking a tentative step towards them. She looked back at Xan, who merely stared back at her, before placing her foot down on one of the moving steps that went up.

She squealed with joy when she felt herself being moved up and immediately brought her other foot up to join the one that was already resting on the moving step. She looked back to find Xan and the others smiling up at her. She felt herself blushing so she turned away. Not a moment later, Xan was behind her and she felt her hand reaching out to wrap itself around her friend’s to hold onto as they made the trip upward.

The first thing Sam noticed when they reached the top was the blinding light. While temporarily blinded, she noticed the air seemed… different; thicker some how. Not only that, but everything seemed louder as well. Noises she didn’t recognize rang in her ears and she felt herself gripping Xan’s hand tighter.

Thankfully, her vision returned quickly and she was able to see what was going on around her. There were people everywhere around her and she was torn between wanting to edge closer to Xan than she already was or branching out and talking to one of the many people she saw. The decision was made for her when someone ran into her, knocking her into her taller friend. Xan thankfully didn’t say anything as she helped Sam steady herself. She gave the dark haired woman a grateful smile before going back to her curious observations.

From what she had learned in her computer, she knew that the large objects on wheels that were rushing past her were called cars, trucks, and buses. She never believed they could go so fast though. It was a shame the computer couldn’t bring back her memories.

“Finally. Could you have taken any longer?” Moira asked as she snapped her gum, earning a disapproving glance from Ilarius. Henry shrugged his broad shoulders before turning to Xan.

“So, where did you want us to go after we met up?” Henry asked. Xan thought for a moment before answering, not sure how to choose her words.

“I wanted to stay with my mother…” she finally said. “I don’t know if she’ll want to have much to do with me now, though.” she added on, gazing down at the ground as she felt a rare moment of insecurity.

“Why wouldn’t she want to see you?” Sam asked. It was times like these when Xan forgot that Sam didn’t know about her past.

“I… I wasn’t a very good person Sam. I did a lot of bad things.” A snort came from Lawrence and Xan was a little flattered to see Sam shooting a glare at him on her behalf.

“Xan, who you were doesn’t matter. It’s who you are now that counts.” the blonde assured her. Xan shrugged, hoping to drop the topic. Instead, she got a look from Sam that said ‘We’ll talk later.’ She sighed to herself and began leading the way to her mother’s inn, lost in her thoughts the whole time.

She couldn’t really believe Sam had just told her that what she had done in the past didn’t matter. She had killed hundreds by with her hands alone. Who knew how many had died because of her gang. ‘How can I forgive myself all that? How could anyone forgive me?’ she wondered as she watched the blonde skip beside Ilarius, who had a grin on his face. Of course, Xan noticed that Lawrence had a scowl on his face as he watched Sam prance around Ilarius. ’Oh, he is definitely up to something.’ she thought. She’d have to keep an eye on him.

They didn’t reach Xan’s mother’s house until around 3:00 and Xan found herself hesitantly walking in the door. As soon as she did, the lobby quieted down and stared at her. This had definitely been a bad idea.

“What are you doing here? Have you come to corrupt more of our children?” one of the women asked with a glare. Xan immediately lowered her head in shame. She was glad she had made the others wait outside while she did this.

“Xan?” a familiar voice called out above the din. The dark haired woman looked up and saw her mother standing at the foot of the stairs.

“Cadrift! Get this murdering monster out of here!” one of the men at the tables yelled before throwing the apple he had been eating at the warrior. Before Xan or her mother could say anything, more food was being thrown at her. It was more shameful than dangerous, but some of the food would leave bruises. Xan didn’t mind though. In fact, she believed she deserved worse.

Xan looked to her mother, to see what she would do. Deep down, the child in Xan wished desperately that her mother would open her arms to her and protect her from the patrons of the inn. In reality, Cadrift Phipolis simply turned her back on her child and allowed the people to pelt her with food. The dark haired woman closed her eyes at the pain of rejection from her mother.

“Stop it!” a familiar voice shrieked and Xan realized that she wasn’t being hit with food anymore. She opened her eyes and found Sam standing in front of her, green eyes burning brightly.

“Stay out of this, little girl!” one of the men shouted from his spot at the bar. Xan noticed Sam roll her eyes.

“Excuse me, but that’s my friend you’re covering with food. I’m not going to stay out of this.” the blonde argued, hands on her hips. “Want to give me an explanation?” Unsure murmurs could be heard throughout the room. Everyone looked at the couple with disbelieving stares, wondering how Xan could be friends with the blonde. Sam cleared her throat, signaling that she was still waiting.

“Sorry miss… we’re just trying to figure out what a thing like you is doing with a monster like that.” the man from the bar explained, glaring at Xan, who looked down at the floor.

“Monster? You must be mistaken. Xan saved my life and she’s saved the lives of others as well.” Sam argued. Xan raised an eyebrow. What made Sam think she had saved the lives of more people?

“She probably only saved you, and them, to recruit into a new gang.” one of the women yelled out.

“Do you see a new gang here? I don’t. That part of Xan’s life is over.” she explained with a smile before turning to Xan and giving her a look that said ’I’ll explain later’.

“Is it really?” a hopeful, yet sad voice asked quietly. Cadrift had turned back to her daughter and now stared openly at her with pleading eyes. Not able to find the words, Xan simply nodded. Her mother smiled and walked over to the two of them. She tentatively took Xan’s hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze before leading the two of them to a door marked ’Employees Only’ behind the bar. A small smile was on Xan’s face.

A piece of her nightmare had just died.

The tension in the room was stifling and Xan couldn’t help but wonder if she had been wrong to think that her mother wanted to speak to her. She had seen a smile on Cadrift’s face, hadn’t she? Or had that been imagined? It didn’t matter now that she and Sam were in the back with her mother, who was refusing to look at her. Whether she was straightening things up or simply tapping her fingers on the kitchen counter, Cadrift refused to look at Xan.

“It’s been awhile.” the older woman said, not looking up from the counter she was scrubbing down for the second time since they entered the kitchen. Xan nodded slightly in agreement before remembering that her mother wasn’t looking at her.

“Yeah…” she replied awkwardly. Never in ten years had she thought she would be speaking to her mother again and now that she was, she had no idea what to say. She knew what she wanted to say, of course, but she couldn’t think of a way to word what she was thinking. Another silence filled the room, neither mother nor daughter knowing what to say to each other after their estrangement.

It took her a moment, but Xan registered a small squeeze of her hand. She looked down and into reassuring green eyes, willing her to keep talking. It was strange; Xan could have sworn that she heard Sam’s voice telling her to keep going, but she never saw the blonde’s lips move. She mentally shook herself and looked back over at her mother.

“Mom, I… well my friends and I… we need a place to stay.” she started; only knowing how to get straight to the point. That was how it was when she had headed her gang. There was never any need for a heart-to-heart; only commands. However, in the real world, that wasn’t the best way for someone to start a conversation, especially when they haven’t talked to that person in ten years. It was a lesson Xan was about to learn first hand.

“So that’s why you’re here; you and your gang members ran out of places to hide and now you’ve turned to your mother?” Cadrift asked, finally looking over at her daughter. The smile from earlier had disappeared and her eyes now had a hard look in them.

“No, that’s not what I meant.” Xan objected, her hands clenching into fists. This was a mistake. She should have never come back. How could she have thought that her mother would forgive her for anything? How could she convince her mother that she had changed, and for the better, when she couldn’t even start off a conversation correctly?

“Xan doesn’t have a gang. She hasn’t had one for three years.” The blonde at her side spoke up. Both she and her mother looked over at Sam, both with curiosity but for different reasons.

“How do you know this?” Xan asked her with a raised eyebrow. The fact that Sam was able to know this about her was unsettling. She had been hoping to hide that part of her life from the small blonde, seeing as the girl was supposed to destroy creatures that were just like her.

“You gave me a computer. You’d be surprised what you can learn on there.” Sam stated, staring up at her blue-eyed friend. “It wasn’t a lot; just enough to tell me that you weren’t always the person you are now.”

“When…?”

“As soon as I was able.” Sam answered before she could finish her sentence. Xan blinked in disbelief. Sam had known all about her since the beginning of the second week of her stay, yet she still had tried to worm her way into Xan’s heart. Why anyone would willingly try to gain her friendship after knowing of the monstrosities she had committed, the dark haired woman didn’t know.

“Is this one of your… friends?” Cadrift asked, casting suspicious glances at Sam. The blonde looked up at Xan expectantly. Were they friends? Sam liked to think so. At least, she felt they were friends. But what did Xan feel?

“Yeah, she’s a friend. One of the best, actually.” Xan finally replied, making Sam’s green eyes sparkle with happiness. She reminded Xan of a child on Christmas morning.

“Hm…” Cadrift looked her daughter up and down. True, it was hard to believe that this stoic woman was once the young teenager that had left her to pursue the gang life, but if she tried hard enough she could remember the little girl that Xan used to be. It may have been motherly instinct or just a guess, but Cadrift thought that just maybe the little blonde next to her daughter could bring the child out in the dark Xan. “Where are your other friends?” she asked quizzically. Xan looked over at Sam, waiting for an answer with a raised eyebrow. Why weren’t the others with her?

“Oh! They went to go purchase supplies!” the blonde supplied happily, glad to be of some help.

“You mean they left you here… alone?” Xan growled, making a mental note to give a lecture later about doing their jobs correctly. Sam shifted guiltily at Xan’s words though.

“Well uh… They kind of don’t know I’m here. See, I was supposed to follow them but then I heard the noise coming from inside… here.” she explained, shrugging her shoulders slightly. “Did I do something wrong?”

It was times like these that Xan wanted desperately to roll her eyes at the little blonde. Instead, she just shook her head. Before Xan could say another word, a large man came flying through the old-fashioned wooden door.

“Next time, listen to the little lady when she says no!” a familiar voice said from the other side of the door. This time Xan did roll her eyes. Lawrence either needed to come up with new material and stop using cliché lines, or just stop talking altogether. She would prefer the latter. She looked over at the man that had come flying through the door; he was out cold.

‘Not bad.’ she thought before walking over to the doorway and listening for other familiar voices.

“Well now that that was discreetly taken care of,” Ilarius’ sarcastic voice said, “we were wondering if any of you had seen a blonde woman come in here.” Xan smiled slightly as she peeked around the wall and saw most of the inn patrons pointing towards the kitchen. “Thanks!” the blonde man said gratefully before heading her way.

Just as he and Lawrence walked through the door, right past Xan, the dark haired woman snuck behind the green-haired teenager and tapped him on the shoulder. Lawrence spun around and threw a punch on instinct. Unfortunately, Xan was faster than him and had his wrist in a vice-like grip before he could blink.

“Lose someone?” she asked, tipping her head in Sam’s direction. Lawrence nodded, too afraid to speak. Xan couldn’t read his thoughts but by the look in his eyes she guessed that they were something along the lines of ‘Oh’ and ‘Shit’. A low chuckle left her throat before she let go of his wrist, which he pulled to his chest, as if he was afraid that she would reach out for it again. “You guys really need to be more careful.” she scolded them, looking over at Sam.

“Xan, are these more friends of yours?” Cadrift asked, looking from the unconscious man to the two newcomers. Her daughter nodded.

“That one’s Ilarius,” Sam pointed to the curly haired blonde man, “and that’s Lorrie.” she said, now pointing to the teenager with long, green hair.

“My name isn’t Lorrie, it’s Lawrence.” he mumbled, stuffing his hands in his pockets and looking down at the floor.

“My my Xan. You have changed tastes in friends.” Cadrift said in a disbelieving voice. “I take it these are all of them?” she asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh no! Henry, Moira, Alicia, and Ace aren’t here yet.” Sam answered for her friend, who had suddenly found the floor more interesting than the conversation going on.

Cadrift sighed. This wasn’t exactly how she had planned her reunion with her daughter. Of course, she had never expected to actually reunite with her estranged child, but she had been hoping if it did happen it would go smoother than this.

“I’ll call him.” Ilarius volunteered before pulling his headset out of the pocket of his purple vest and sliding it over his ear. “Henry, we found her. Yeah. Yeah. No, she was back at the inn with Xan. Meet back here once you’ve picked up the supplies.” he said into the microphone that was attached to the earphone. Once the call was over, he pulled the headset off and put it back in his pocket. “Henry’s on his way with the others.” he informed the others with a grin.

“Wait a minute! Who exactly is this Henry?” Cadrift asked, getting tired of having a conversation about someone she didn’t know.

“Well, his real name is Henlaricles.” Lawrence said, finally speaking up. That was enough to stun Xan’s mother into silence. For a few minutes they all stood in a strange silence, the only sounds their breathing and the noises of the other employees cooking.

“If you don’t mind, I think I need to speak to my daughter privately.” she finally said, breaking the tense silence. Before any of them could object, she was shooing them out the door and into the lobby until Xan was the only one left in the room. Cadrift sighed as she leaned her forehead against the wooden door before turning to her daughter once more. “You have a lot of explaining to do, young lady.” she said in a motherly tone that clearly said ‘no arguing’. Xan felt her hands clench into fists once more as she tried to think of what to tell her mother about the last three years. “But you can do that later. Right now, you need to give your mother a hug.”

Xan blinked. She hadn’t been expecting that, but it was a pleasant surprise. She nodded her agreement before walking over to Cadrift and awkwardly wrapping her arms around the woman that raised her.

Cadrift allowed everyone to stay at her inn, on the one condition that Xan at least tell her about what had made her change her ways before they had to leave. It was an agreement that the dark-haired Guardian had gladly agreed to. It had been so long since she had spoken to her mother; she was dying to let her know she had done something that would make Cadrift proud to call her daughter.

The inn owner hadn’t expected her dark daughter to open up to her automatically. So she was pleasantly surprised when, a week after they started staying at her place, Xan paid a visit to her while she was doing the dishes.

“Mom, I was um… wondering if you were busy?” Cadrift noticed Xan’s nervous glance towards the blonde woman standing next to her. There was obviously something about the other woman’s presence that seemed to calm her daughter.

“I’m never too busy for my own daughter, Xan.” she replied with a smile as she placed the last dish on the rack and slid the glass cover down. “So… what do you want?” she asked after pressing a series of buttons on the class cover she had just slid down.

“You said you wanted to know about what changed me,” Xan looked over once again at the smaller woman, who gave her an encouraging smile, “I was going to tell you now?” It came out as a question, as if Xan was asking for permission to continue.

Cadrift blinked. This certainly wasn’t what she had expected to hear coming from her daughter. For a moment, the only sound in the room was coming from the dishwasher.

“Oh!“ the older woman said, finally breaking the awkward silence. “Of course, Xan. Feel free to tell me anything.” Cadrift hastily wiped her hands on her apron before looking over at Sam, wondering if the other woman would be joining them.

“Sam, do you mind waiting here while I talk with my mother?” Xan asked, secretly hoping her young friend would mind. What had made her think she was ready to talk to her mother?

“Of course not. Take all the time you need.” The dark haired woman mentally sighed. Of course Sam wouldn’t mind. ‘She wants me to patch things up with my mother almost as much as I do.’ she thought before turning back to her mom with a small, unsure smile. “Well, shall we go up to your room then?” After receiving a nod from her mother, Xan led the older woman out of the kitchen and up the nearby stairs, ignoring the stares they received from the patrons. It seemed that there were still those uncomfortable with her staying at the hotel, even if she was gone most of the time.

Xan’s heart rate increased as they walked down the hall of the second floor. Now that she was about to talk to her mother, she had no idea what she was going to say.

‘I’m definitely going to glaze over some parts.’ she decided mentally as they reached Cadrift’s room. The older woman opened the wooden door and led Xan inside. The dark haired woman realized that her mother’s room probably had more furnishing and knick-knacks than her entire house did. There was a homey feel to the room, with the earthy brown and green colors of the blankets and rugs. Photographs of her and her brothers were placed throughout the room, on shelves and dressers. On the table next to her mother’s bed was a picture of all four of them together. They had been the perfect family; only without a father present. The warm environment made Xan relax a bit more, some of her anxiety disappearing. If her mother still kept pictures of her, it meant that she hadn’t disowned her entirely.

“Come on and sit down Xan. I won’t bite.” Her mother grinned at her from the twin bed, patting the space beside her. Xan was still for a moment before tentatively taking a seat next to the auburn haired woman.

The minutes seemed to tick by in an awkward silence as Xan tried to think of what to tell her mother. It was no easy feat, trying to explain what had changed her from a bloodthirsty gang leader to a Guardian, fighting for good.

“Sam would be much better at this…” she mumbled as she looked down at the green blanket covering the soft mattress.

“What?”

“Sorry. I was just talking to myself.” she said, turning her attention to the older woman. “I really don’t know where to start.” Xan admitted after a few more moments went by in silence.

“The beginning is usually a good place.” Cadrift told her, gently taking her hand and smiling.

‘You already know the beginning’ Xan thought sadly before beginning her story. “I’m pretty sure that you’ve gotten to know Henry by now.” she started off, “He’s the main reason why I changed my ways…” Cadrift looked at her daughter with an interested expression on her face.

“Go on.” she encouraged when Xan didn’t keep going. The dark haired woman sighed before continuing.

“I was in a tough spot, mom. I was getting tired of the killing and the fighting… tired of everything.” Xan’s jaw was clenched as she tried to keep her emotions in check. This wasn’t an easy story to tell, even when she was leaving the worst parts out. “You probably already know that you can’t simply quit being in a gang, especially when you’re the one running it.” This earned a nod from her mother, but Xan didn’t notice. She was stuck too far back in the past to see anything going on outside her mind.

“Since I couldn’t leave the gang, I tried to force myself to like it again. I thought that if I killed Henlaricles I’d be satisfied with myself and I’d feel that pride in myself that I used to get.” Xan gave a self-depreciating snort. “I was such an idiot. Henry wiped the floor with me. I don’t know what made me think that I could beat him. He’s practically a god, y’know.”

“You weren’t an idiot. Maybe a bit reckless, but not an idiot.” Cadrift said, smiling at her daughter. Xan gave her a small smile back, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Keep going.” Xan nodded and continued her story.

“Everything started to go down hill from there. The gang, they didn’t think I was fit to lead. They stopped respecting my orders.” A painful memory flashed through Xan’s mind before she continued. “I began to realize that if I didn’t do something fast, I’d never get my gang back. As much as I hated the life, it was the only thing I knew and the only place left I had to go. I couldn’t lose that. So, I went after Henry again.”

“I almost beat him this time, but, unlike me, Henry had friends. He taught me a valuable lesson that second time he beat me.” Xan looked over at her mother, who now had tears threatening to fall. “Love isn’t a weakness; it’s the strongest force in the universe. Love gives people the strength to fight for those that matter to them even when all seems lost.” That had caused the tears in Cadrift’s eyes to fall.

The tears weren’t just for the years she had lost with her daughter because of what had happened in the past. They were for the pain her daughter had to endure to learn a lesson she had forgotten. They were also for the happiness she felt that her daughter had been able to relearn the lesson. It seemed that she had been wrong; her daughter hadn’t been beyond saving. A frown crossed Cadrift’s face. ‘Maybe if I had just went to see her…’ Before she could continue with her ‘What if’ thoughts, Xan started speaking again.

“Henry must have been able to see something in me that day. He didn’t kill me and he helped me make a deal with GPA. They ran a few tests on me, to make sure I wouldn’t revert back to my old ways unprovoked. After that, I was made into a Protector. I was able to move up to Guardian status rather quickly with my fighting abilities.” Xan smirked as she remembered those that hated her because she had moved through the ranks so quickly. Her smile disappeared when she remembered what the ‘tests’ had consisted of. That was something she definitely wasn’t going to tell her mother.

As for Cadrift, she knew her daughter was leaving some parts out, but she got the gist of what happened. Deciding she could let her daughter off the hook this time, she smiled and wiped her eyes.

“Thank you Xan. I know it must have been hard to tell me that.” she said gratefully before catching the dark woman by surprise and giving her a kiss on the forehead. Surprised by the motherly action, Xan just sat there with a dumbfounded look on her face. “I think it’s time we got back to your friend. She might start getting bored if I keep you up here too long.” Cadrift suggested with a smile. Right after she said this, a shriek of surprise was heard, followed by a loud crash.

Not waiting for her mother, Xan jumped up from the bed and took off out of the room. Taking the steps two at a time, she couldn’t help but wonder what trouble her little blonde friend had just gotten herself into. Her mother was halfway down the stairs when Xan rounded the corner into the kitchen where Sam was. The sight that greeted her almost made her double over laughing.

On the floor, surrounded by broken dishes and soapy water was Sam. The drenched woman had a shocked look on her face as she looked over at Xan. That did make the stoic woman break into laughter.

“Xaaaaan! It’s not funny!” Sam complained with an indignant expression on her face. After a few seconds though, she started joining in with her friend.

“What happened in here?!” an angry sounding voice shrieked, causing both Xan and Sam to stop laughing and look in the doorway. There stood Cadrift, wondering why her daughter’s friend was surrounded by a puddle of water and her, now broken, dishes.

“That’s what I was just about to ask.” Xan said, her voice now serious. She turned back to face Sam with a questioning expression on her face.

“I’m sorry. I just.. I wanted to know how it worked.” Sam apologized quietly, looking over at the opening in the wall that used to hold dishes. “I didn’t know that the plates would all fall out if I pushed the glass up.”

“That doesn’t explain why you’re on the floor.” Xan pointed out. Sam blushed and looked away from Xan, mumbling something. “What?”

“I said I slipped on the water!” she repeated, a bit louder than she intended. Through the open doorway, the patrons looked in at them. This caused Sam to blush a deeper color, which in turn made Xan chuckle. The Guardian looked over at her mother as she tried to control herself.

“I’ll clean it up, mom. Promise.” she assured the older woman, who just rolled her eyes.

“Kids…” Cadrift sighed before leaving her daughter with the strange blonde woman. Once her mother left, Xan turned back to Sam.

“What am I going to do with you?” she asked, shaking her head as she walked over to her friend.

“Dry me off, preferably.” Sam told her, receiving a laugh from Xan.

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? Sorry, but that would just be too nice. You’re stuck being wet until we clean this up.” she said. “Just think of it as punishment, Velcro.” she told the girl, ruffling her blonde hair before pulling her up. Sam just shook her head and began to help Xan pick up the broken shards of the plates.

As they sat there quietly picking up the broken plates, Xan’s thoughts began to go wild. She didn’t understand why Sam liked her so much, but she was glad the little blonde did. She had helped her open up to her mother and she wasn’t so cold towards the other Guardians, either. Sometimes, Sam even made her forget what she had been, and sometimes still felt she was. Sam seemed to chase away all the shadows of her past with her bright personality.

‘Maybe she’s my light.’ Xan thought with a smirk. Her hand stopped mid motion as she reached for another piece of the plates. Memories of darkness flooded her mind as she remembered the dream she had before she met Sam. Hadn’t the figure at the end of the dream said that she was her light? “Sam?” she whispered.

“Hmm?” the blonde asked as she began scrubbing the water up off the floor. When Xan didn’t answer her, she looked over at her dark haired friend. The other woman seemed lost in thought. “Xan, did you say something?” she asked. Blue eyes moved up from the floor and looked at Sam with a strange expression. Before Sam could analyze it, it was gone.

“I just wanted to say thank you.”

“For what?”

“Everything.”

Author’s Note: I tried writing chapter 7, but I realized that it ended up just being an extension of this chapter. So, I combined the two. I’ll have chapter 7 written soon though! I do hope you enjoyed the extension of this chapter, however.