With snow falling lightly, my shoes crunched on the virgin crispness of the glistening white ground as I arrived at my destination. Staring at the Georgian style bow fronted window I am reminded of a card one might send at this time of the year. Snow flakes falling softly through the air and like a snow globe in its full glory, there appears the shimmering image of a Christmas tree in a window with brightly bubbling lights flowing from each branch that sparkles with the many decorated ornaments adorning them. It is the illusion of Christmas you have in your mind and dredge up once a year which, in my opinion, rarely satisfies the child that remains within everyone just as the season of goodwill seldom meets ones expectations. I ascended the lightly snow covered concrete steps, five in all, and pressed the bell.
Having spent most of my life in institutionalised environments I recall only sketchily a family Christmas. I was probably four or five at the time and the smell of roasting chestnuts on the fire and marshmallows in hot chocolate were the smells I recall and laughter - lots of laughter. Perhaps, if I search around my memory I might even remember the first present I opened from under the tree. However, that was a long time ago and now my Christmas festivities are about as enriched with laughter and traditional celebrations as the beggar on the street. Well, perhaps that is a little harsh. I was always invited along with the four other employees to my boss’s home for a few drinks with a buffet a few days before Christmas. Everyone always attended for our boss would be upset if someone from the office didn’t attend without good reason. Then, in his jolly way, he’d wish us all a wonderful best wishes for the season and, in true Dicke
ns style, goodwill to all men. He even sent us all home with a small gift to be opened on Christmas morning.
I am the personal assistant to Darren Nicholby who had started a small insurance company twenty years earlier that had grown steadily over the years. He was never going to give the big guns a run for their money, but he never had had any intention of being in their league. He wanted to remain a small family run company with people that cared. And, was exactly what he accomplished. In our town he was looked on with great admiration by many. His generosity and compassion for people’s plights were the tell-tale signs that he’d never be a millionaire this time around. However, that wasn’t what life was all about for Darren. He was a solid upstanding citizen with a wife he adored and who adored him. He had two children who must have been bestowed with their dad’s kindness of heart because I’d never seen them do anything but smile every time I’d meet them over the years.
My musing’s ended as the door opened and I looked up into the face of a stranger, where is Darren, Elsie or the twins?
“Hi, welcome, you must be Laura.” The voice was melodic almost singing the words as happiness flowed from it without effort. It made me wonder how many festive drinks she’d already had.
Flicking the snow that had drifted into my eyes with the light wind, I smiled briefly and answered, “Yes I’m Laura. Since you know my name it can only mean one thing…I’m the last to arrive.” It happened to me every year. I always meant to get there at seven, but somehow my feet dragged and I ended up arriving at least an hour behind everyone else.
After I entered the home, the woman, who was smiling broadly, motioned for my snow flecked coat. “Let me take that. I’ll put it close to one of the radiators and it will be dry and cosy when you leave.”
“Mom, mom you’re never going to believe what uncle Darren is doing now!” A small girl, who was perhaps five or six, arrived in a hurry from the sitting room.
“I’ll be there in a moment sweetie. Will you take Laura inside to the others?” The stranger winked at her daughter and left us alone in the hallway.
When a small child stands in front of you and looks at you with those innocent, yet aged eyes, for a split second you’re afraid. Usually the question is of what and the answer is simply everything. Then, when the small person speaks and, in a gesture that is somewhat surprising, places her small hand in yours and begins dragging you towards the sitting room, you’re even more afraid. “Laura I’m Clancy. Come on hurry or you’ll miss my uncle doing his party trick.”
Seconds later we were inside the sitting room that appeared to be teaming with people - happy people at that. Fortunately for me, but disappointing to the child still holding my hand, Darren had completed whatever the party trick was.
“Laura, at last, we all thought you were never going to get here,” Darren’s jolly voice boomed out. I received some knowing looks from my colleagues, especially David Fisher, who rolled his eyes in boredom. He was a loss adjuster for the company and I didn’t care too much for him in the best of times and found him particularly obnoxious at this time of year. I suspect if Miranda, Darren’s secretary, hadn’t told him on his first day that this invitation was mandatory he wouldn’t be here. It wasn’t mandatory exactly. Usually the look in Darren’s eyes if there was even a whisper that someone wasn’t attending broke any defences you put up. Talk about puppy dog eyes.
“Sorry everyone I had to make a few calls.” I crossed my fingers when I said that because it was a bare-faced lie. How could I tell them that I really didn’t want to be there?
Elsie, Darren’s wife, crossed the room and hugged me warmly. “Thank you for coming Laura, it means a great deal to us all.” For some people to say that kind of remark you’d take it with a pinch of salt. But there was never any doubt that Elsie meant every word. “I think you know most people here, it’s the usual crowd.” The group included the office staff I worked with and a few of the Nicholby’s close friends. However, there were noticeable new entrants to the party. Notably the woman who’d answered the door, the child called Clancy, and a couple seated in the far corner of the room with the Nicholby’s children.
“Most not all,” I said glancing discreetly over to the sofa where the strangers were sitting. At the same time, Darren came over with a huge drink of…well let me say a concoction of drinks to make his special merry punch as he called it. Merry and punch do ring true. It certainly makes you merry and whacks a punch in the morning with a headache.
“Here you go my special punch. We have some special guests joining us this year.” With a smile that seemed to envelope his whole face, Darren made some quick introductions. “Over there with the twins are Mark and Amelia Turner. They are close friends of my sister Jean who answered the door. Now where is she? Ah, there she is lurking in the doorway.” He motioned for the woman to join us. “Laura, this is my baby sister Jean Nicholby.” He smiled fondly at the woman who seemed to cringe with the baby comment. “Jean, this is my right hand at work Laura Ramsey.” His eyes twinkled. “The one I told you about.”
The one he told her about? My mind was doing somersaults, now why would he talk about me to his sister of all people.
I should have known there was some relationship for, just like her brother, she had those sparkling eyes and that ready smile. “Jean here is thinking about finally settling back in town. She’s been threatening that for the last four years I hope this will be the year. She’s been living in California for the last ten years. My sister is the clever one of the family,” he said proudly. “She’s an orthodontist and has made pots of money in the sunshine state.”
There was a significant groan from my left side as the woman named Jean held out her hand, “Hi Laura. Take no notice of him. He’s only jealous because I have a tan all year round and he doesn’t.”
“Hello again, pleased to meet you. I guess you’ll be feeling the cold here since somehow rusting is more the norm than tanning at this time of year.”
David Fisher, who was now on my right side, gave a yawn before he interrupted. “Laura when did you ever attempt to make a joke before, I didn’t realise you had it in you.” He sarcastically laughed before loudly asking, “Hey, has anyone in the room ever heard Laura make a joke?”
The people in the room all looked in our direction, rolled their eyes at David then returned their attention to whatever they were doing.
I flashed my grey-blue eyes to his and it was enough to silence him. I never had liked him much. He was far too arrogant with the customers but Darren said he was good at what he did. I dismissed the sorry ass from my mind ignoring his crass comment completely when I felt a tug at my hand.
“I’m Clancy Nicholby-Turner. This is my mom and sitting over there is my dad.” The child pointed out her parents with childlike pride.
I bent slight and shook the tiny hand that was in my much larger one. “Hello Clancy Nicholby-Turner it’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m Laura Ramsey.”
The child’s eyes shone brightly as I spoke to her like an adult. I must have done something right because she kept hold of my hand and dragged me towards the food. With a wry glance behind me to the indulgent adults that followed our departure, I allowed myself to be escorted to the buffet. Then remarkably, the precocious child filled a plate then led us to two empty chairs where we shared the variety of delicacies.
Even when you don’t want to be at a party the happiness and joy some people exude simply overwhelm you and for whatever reason you find yourself enjoying the few hours spent with really nice people. This year was no different from the previous fifteen I’d spent in the Nicholby’s home and I knew I’d go home that little bit happier after the event. Except, tonight was different! I actually was trying to make an effort and not because it was polite to do so, but because a tiny hand kept grasping mine throughout the evening and pulling me along into anything and everything that was going on. In the past I would be content to sit in a chair and observe what was happening and never joined in. It was interesting and fun to view the events through the eyes of a small child. Often I would search out the child’s mother who would smile and nod her head in approval. Although there were many times when the little hand led me to where the
woman was standing or sitting. Since I was a stranger I guessed she wanted the security of her mother.
When finally it was time for the child to go to bed she gave a scowl that was somewhat reminiscent of one I knew I did as a child. Interestingly enough, I hadn’t thought about being a child for months perhaps years. Yet in the space of a couple of hours, memories had arisen. I guess that was the miracle, if you could call it that, of Christmas.
I was dragged from my meandering thoughts when I heard my name being mentioned. “I want Laura to take me!”
She wanted me to take her where? I wondered. Frantically locking gazes with that of the child’s mother, I received an apologetic expression.
The pleading on the little girl’s face had me at a disadvantage. I’m not soft hearted or anything like that; in fact most would call me the exact opposite. “Ok, where do you want me to take you?” I asked quietly as I peered into the child’s friendly, trusting eyes.
A gleeful grin and chuckle were my answer as she once more tugged at my hand and dragged me towards the staircase. I was a hesitant, though willing captive and certain that this kind of thing had never happened to me before. How could it? I rarely interacted with children. Basically, I was a child myself and the only young people I’d any interaction with were the Nicholby’s twins. At the top of the stairs Clancy pointed to the door that was supposedly her room. We entered and once inside I could clearly see that two personalities vied for supremacy in the room - young and old. I checked out some of the items strewn around the room and saw posters depicting what must be the latest craze in rock and movie stars and toiletries, creams and the like were on the dresser indicating a mature adult. On the king-size bed were some well-used soft children’s toys.
“That’s my favourite rabbit. Want to know what they call him Laura?” The child ran over to the bed and flopped on top of the coverlet as she reached for the ragged object. It had one eye missing and by the look of the left ear with different coloured cottons used for the stitching, had been sewn up several times.
“Sure Clancy.” I decided that this fascinating interlude in my life was just that, fascinating and never likely to occur again. Therefore, why not go with the flow and see how it all panned out.
The child chuckled. “He’s not called Clancy - that’s my name.” An uproariously laugh followed. The child was clearly tickled by the thought.
I smiled at the retort and a part of my heart melted towards this child; she was really very endearing. “Ok, sorry about that. I think you’d better introduce him to me properly along with his friend of course.” My eyes drifted to the bear that looked even worse than the rabbit and a lot older.
With a giggled and approving smile, Clancy reached for the bear too. “This is Tubby, he belongs to mummy, but don’t tell her I told will you. She said it’s our little secret.”
The grin that split my face was accompanied by a deep chuckle from the person in question who had appeared at the door. With a bland expression on her face, Jean stood there presumably waiting for my reaction. “Really, well I have one just like it too on my bed at home he’s called a…a…Ralph.”
There was another giggle from the child, as she rolled her eyes. “Ralph? That’s a funny name for a bear, my rabbit is called Jack. Get it Laura? Jack rabbit.” The item was thrust in my face and I recoiled slightly.
Jean Nicholby stepped into the room at that moment and chastised her child, “Clancy that’s enough. Laura needs to get back to the party, not play with you. Say goodnight and thank Laura for her company.”
What happened next was another first for me as the child, with a petulant expression that quickly changed to a huge smile, threw her arms around my neck and hugged me tightly. Then she kissed the side of my cheek and whispered, “Thank you Laura, Merry Christmas. Will you be coming over for turkey too?”
“Go brush your teeth and wash your face for bed Clancy,” Jean said with gentle authority. Her daughter slipped by us with her pj’s in her hands, out of the room.
Jean Nicholby gave me an apologetic glance as she pulled back the coverlet on the bed that she presumably shared with her daughter. “Sorry about all this, Clancy is a friendly child, too friendly sometimes. It takes eyes in the back of your head to watch her. I’ll take it from here so you can go back and enjoy the party. Darren is in full swing with one of his Christmas anecdotes.” I must have groaned out loud as Jean looked up from her labours and smiled.
“Hmm, yes he can go over the top can’t he? He means well and Elsie manages to stop him before people want to kill him.” She grinned indulgently as she spoke of her family.
“He’s a good man. He just wants people to be happy,” I answered softly.
Once she had finished her work on the bed, Jean directed her total attention to me. “If you wait a few minutes while I settle Clancy, we can hide in the kitchen and have a decent drink before Darren realises we aren’t in the main room.” Her voice was alive with warm mischief, almost as if what she was saying was something out of turn.
Strangely enough, I liked this woman. I didn’t know her but just like her daughter, she was …endearing too. “I’ll go to the kitchen and find those drinks, any preference?”
The look she gave me then contained what I would say was one of summing up of what I’d said in context to who she perceived me to be. “Great, anything you’re having will be good …except the punch.”
I left with a smile of approval and headed for the kitchen with a spring in my step that was making me feel quite light headed. It must have been those three glasses of punch I had.
+ + +
In the kitchen were two of my other colleagues. By the conspiring they were engaged in I think they were closer than anyone of us in the office suspected. Or, it could be one of those Christmas office-party types of affairs - they both stared at me in annoyance and guilt when I entered. Breaking the embrace and with a hasty explanation that they both needed a cigarette break they opened the outside door and left me alone in the room. I didn’t mind, it was better that way. What happened in the time outside of the office had nothing to do with me and I wanted to keep it that way. I knew Darren always had other drinks available so I opened the refrigerator and took out two bottles of beer and placed them on the counter. Frowning, I realised that although I enjoyed the odd beer the other woman might not. Perhaps she was more a wine person. I looked in the bar cooler where several bottles of white wine chilled and on the table beside the cooler where sev
eral reds were opened and breathing. Choices, choices, choices and I didn’t have a clue about wine at all.
“Too many to choose from,” drifted across my shoulder.
I turned and looked up a little embarrassed that I hadn’t been confident enough to choose. I shrugged and pointed to the beers on the counter and then to the bar where the wine was waiting. “Yes, I wasn’t sure what you’d prefer.”
A speculative glance caught my own embarrassed one and, as she looked into my eyes, I felt decidedly trapped but in a nice way. Then she smiled and I was reminded again of how alike she and her brother were when it came to facial expressions. “Anything other than Darren’s punch is good for me. What do you prefer?” She reached for a bottle of beer and opened first one and then the other before she had my answer.
I stood there surprised and annoyed for not having that assurance myself. “Beer is good.” I accept the proffered bottle and we went silent as we drank from the bottles.
As we stood there, we could hear the background noises of our fellow party revellers and I knew it was really up to me to begin a conversation. “Your daughter is a bright child, you and …her father must be proud of her?”
With a tender smile, Jean looked out of the kitchen window for a moment, her mind presumably miles away. Then she absently answered, “Yes we are, she’s been a marvellous bonus to my life.”
I was lost for conversation again but this time I knew why. That faraway sad look in Jean’s eyes puzzled me. What I had deemed an innocent question appeared to have struck a chord, and obviously not a good one. Perhaps Clancy’s father, who was in the next room, hadn’t wanted a child or maybe they had parted on bad terms or - I could think of several scenarios but only she knew the truth.
“I figured Clancy would have preferred her dad or mom to take her to bed. It was a bit of a surprise when she asked me.”
A tinkle of laughter which was a more adult version of the child’s, greeted my comment. “Mark is up there now finishing the story he started last night. He doesn’t see her as often as he’d like. He’s an airline pilot and he married Amelia a couple of months ago. This appeared to be a good time to get together. They leave tomorrow to return to San Francisco and will spend the rest of the holiday with her parents.”
“I see, kind of hard on Clancy. She probably expected her dad to be there Christmas morning.” My heart did a knee-jerk reaction to what I perceived as the man’s disregard to his daughter’s happiness on Christmas day.
Jean drank some more from her beer and smiled wryly. “It’s not what you think. Clancy isn’t that kind of child. She’s one of those children that understand what’s going on around her when she really shouldn’t. An old soul I think it is called. Sometimes I think she’s more the adult than I am.”
“Does it bother you that he has a new wife?” Oh no what am I saying. This has nothing to do with me at all. She is a complete stranger and I am asking the most personal of questions. I was expecting a sharp and probably caustic reply to my inquisitive question but it never came. Instead an explanation did and I was equally more stunned into silence.
“Not at all, I’m happy for them both. Mark deserves some happiness after the last five years. I at least had Clancy. He had no one until Amelia came into his life last year.” Jean was away in a dream world again and then she gave me a surprisingly warm gaze as she continued. “He lost his parent’s within months of each other two years ago and five years ago we both lost Ellen.”
It was the, we both lost, which puzzled me. She must have realised that, as she spoke again this time her tone rang with a sad memory. “Sorry you won’t know what I mean. Ellen was Mark’s sister. She was my best friend and my partner. There was a freak accident when she was running in the park almost a year after Clancy was born. A car veered off the road and killed her instantly.”
“How terrible, was the driver prosecuted for their negligence?” A typical insurance retort and I wish I hadn’t said anything when she replied quietly.
“That was the freaky part of the accident. The driver was only thirty-three and had a heart attack and died at the wheel. He never had any heart related problems so how could I blame him. He left a wife and two daughters, one Clancy’s age. We keep in touch at birthdays and that kind of thing.” She sighed. “It was an unfortunate accident nothing more.”
Even through all the tragedy Jean managed to remain a generous caring person - must be in the Nicholby genes. No way would I have wanted to have anything to do with people who were even remotely related to someone who had taken a precious person from my life in such a way. “You’re very magnanimous. Not sure I would be in the same circumstances.”
Jean gave me a concentrated stare and was about to say something else when the outer door to the kitchen opened and in walked the two who had left earlier for a cigarette. They looked cold and shook snow from their indoors clothes.
“Hey you two are brave. What made you go outside?” Jean asked her face wreathed in a smile. All the sadness had gone as she reached inside a cupboard and handed them each a small hand towel to dry off with.
They both looked at me sheepishly and then showed her the packet of cigarettes. “The dreaded weed, hmm I’ve had a few cold evenings on the porch myself in the past. Want something to drink to warm you up, you both look freezing.”
They mumbled, “No we need to get back to the others we’ve been gone for quiet a while.”
I watched them leave and at the same time heard Darren telling one of the twins to crank up the volume and let the dancing begin. I guess it is time I go back. They might miss me too. I doubted it as I was on my own as usual when most of the others had partners in tow. Dancing wasn’t my speciality either. In fact, I’d never been dancing that I could clearly recall. Even here at the Nicholby’s home I’d made a pact with Darren that I would attend the party on the proviso that he didn’t insist that I dance…ever! To date he had kept the agreement though David Fisher was on his own this evening. Surely he wouldn’t inflict that idiot on me. “I guess I’d better get in there too, thanks for the beer.” Turning away, I headed towards the music.
“Do you want to dance?”
I turned back around. What kind of question is that? Is she asking me to dance? I found that totally improbable. Or, is she asking me if I enjoyed dancing? Damn, which way do I answer that. Fortunately my brain decided to kick in and help me out at last or that was the idea anyway. “Do you?”
There was a brilliant flash of a smile and she nodded. “Absolutely! What’s a party without a good jive to the old Christmas jingles.” I closed my eyes briefly as she, like her daughter earlier, grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the revellers dancing in the middle of the room - her laughter rang behind us as we left the kitchen. I am going to be so, so embarrassed at work!This can’t be happening.
As it turned out, the whole experience was surreal to me. I even conceded that I actually enjoyed myself, so much so I even danced in a rather awkward fashion with Darren and a couple of the other guys in the room. Jean had been whisked away by various people and I saw her laughing in a close embrace with Mark Turner. How could she even get close to the guy? A slight tremor went through me as I saw them together and my mind to wander a little about them together and I realized I was jealous. That had me worried. Why would I be jealous? I finally feigned tiredness I sat down next to Elsie who smiled at me warmly. “Well, I see someone finally got you up to dance - it was about time.” Her words were spoken in a happy way and I had to admit I had enjoyed the experience though I’d hardly term myself in the league of the rest who were dancing around.
“Yes, your sister-in-law is as hard to say no to as her daughter.” In retrospect I hadn’t even tried to say no. I’d just gone along in the flow of things, very strange behaviour for me.
Elsie placed her hand on mine and gave it a gentle squeeze. “She is a woman who can cast a spell and weave its magic on the heart. It runs in the family I guess. When I first met Darren, we were poles apart as to who I thought I’d become involved with. Somehow he wove a spell over me the first time I he smiled at me and now look at us. Did he tell you our news?”
Does Elsie think that I am enchanted by Jean? Then I automatically answered her question, “No, are you going to share?”
Excitedly Elsie moved forward in her seat. “With you? Of course. I’m pregnant! Can you believe that? Isn’t it incredible?”
Incredible , well you could say that. Although if it had been me I would have more likely screamed why me! “Congratulations, did you plan on another or was it an accident?”
“Not exactly Laura. We’ve always wanted another baby. We thought once the twins were two we would try again. We did, well have been ever since I guess you’d say, and the twins are fifteen now. Another of Santa’s miracles I’d call it. I found out for sure yesterday.” Elsie was beaming and I was happy for them both.
“So the old dog isn’t useless after all is he,” I said grinning. At that moment the music changed to one of those loves songs everyone dances real close together. Thank goodness I’d left the dancing when I had. Then Darren came over and with a wink at me, held out his hand for his wife. There weren’t any words passed between them but you could see the love they shared in every movement of their body.
Another baby at their ages… what am I saying Elsie is my age! If I choose I could still consider motherhood in the future. I’d have to find a partner first. Mentally I hit my forehead and the penny dropped …oh that’s what Jean meant by partner. My mind flashed back to our earlier conversation and a part of me was flattered that she thought Jean might be interested in me. But, I was curious as to why Elsie might think I was interested in another woman. I’d never mentioned boy or girl friends to anyone. I’d always considered it my personal business and no affair of anyone else.
“Hi, mind if I join you?” I looked up and, with a slight rush of blood to my face, blushed slightly. I waved vaguely in the direction of the sofa. She sank down next to me, kicked off her shoes and began wriggling her toes.
“I haven’t danced like that in years, what about you Laura?” Jean’s voice held that chime of laughter that, in the very, very short time I’d known her, would be the trade mark I’d always look for when, more likely if, we ever met again. A soft smile accompanied the sound and I had to admit that for the first time in my life I wanted to make the effort and spend time with someone – this woman in particular. I want to spend time with her How strange that sounds to me.
“I’ve never danced like that before,” I pronounced quietly.
Her sparkling eyes flashed to mine as she stared at me in wonder. “Really? You’re not telling me this is the first time you’ve ever danced here?”
I looked down and was surprised to find my eyes travelling to Jean’s toes, which were still being flexed. “The first time here yes. Actually the first time ever.”
Feeling the touch of a hand on my chin as it was slowly being raised, I wanted to resist but somehow that gentle touch made it futile. I was captured by Jean’s eyes as she took my hand and dragged me off the sofa. She whispered, “In that case Laura, let’s complete the education shall we.”
The first slow music had receded followed by an even slower one as she placed her hands on my waist and rather than keep mine regimented by my side I followed suit on her waist. We swayed in what I hoped was time to the music but I wasn’t really sure at all. All I knew was that I was happy and wanted the moments to last for a lot longer than the three minutes of the music. As the last note ended I shyly looked up and saw a question in Jean’s eyes and I knew what she was asking.
“Thank you Jean, I enjoyed the dance.” The fact that I was there, in my boss’ home surrounded by co-workers and dancing with a women didn’t seem to faze me in the least. All I knew was that I was sorry the music had ended.
Jean gave me a direct gaze that held warmth and a hint of hesitation. This was a first for from the moment we’d met, Jean had always been supremely confident. Now she isn’t. It made me wonder what she was thinking - probably what kind of woman has never danced before?
“My pleasure Laura, I was…”
I stopped her and gave her a quick smile. “I’m sorry but I must be going it is getting late and with the snow and all I really must go. I’m sorry.” Of course it wasn’t that late only around midnight and the snow was of no real consequence to me but… I had a feeling that if I didn’t go then something was going to happen to me that I couldn’t cope with or control.
“Sure. Okay.” Jean looked confused and slightly embarrassed. “Darren,” she called her brother over. “Laura is leaving.”
“Oh, I’m sorry to see you go. Can’t you stay a bit longer?”
“No,” I said firmly. “I really need to go.” All the while I was trembling inside and didn’t know why. My eyes secretly looked at Jean who’s face though jovial held a hint of sadness.
“Then I shall call you a cab.”
“No, its ok it really isn’t that far.”
“It’s late and snowing. I’ll have no argument on this.”
I knew the subject was no longer up for debate and ten minutes later the taxi arrived. Elsie had given me my coat that Jean had said on my arrival would be placed it in a position to dry it out. It was cosy and warm - the heavier snow that was now falling wasn’t going to bother me at all.
As I was about to leave, Darren said, “I’ll walk you to the cab.”
What was it with men in particular, who thought that women were incapable of doing the simple things, like opening a cab door for themselves. I allowed him the gesture because I wasn’t in the mood to argue. In fact, I felt pretty darn good both inside and out but a feeling of trepidation was stirred into the mix.
“I was wondering Laura, if you might change your mind and come over for lunch on Christmas day? You know it’s just the family as always. Well, with the addition of Clancy and…Jean.”
Is he matchmaking? No not possible, that wouldn’t be his style. He was more subtle than that and this invitation had been offered to me from the first year he’d known that I spent the holidays alone. I had always declined and tonight was going to be no exception…except. For a few moments I did actually want to say yes. I wasn’t sure if it was the fact that I was feeling giddy or that I knew Clancy and Jean would be there. However, I denied myself that pleasure and shook my head.
“Not this year Darren. Maybe next when the new baby arrives and you need an extra pair of hands.” I climbed into the cab and it roared away, though I did have the satisfaction of rendering him speechless for a second. He obviously didn’t know that Elsie had told me of the upcoming birth.
As I sat in the back of the cab, I must have been smiling like a goof because the cab driver began to speak with me.
“If that smile is anything to go by that must have been one great party.”
As another first for my life happened - I actually spent the ride home making small talk with the driver.
+ + +
Christmas Eve at the office was its usually merry time. We all brought something into work for a celebration. There were four other companies in the building and ours was lower keyed than the other office parties. But, we all had a great time until Darren told us all to go home early. As was my custom, I stayed and manned the phones for another hour while Darren did his traditional thing and along with a couple of his friends in the building did the rounds.
I looked up at the clock and saw that soon Elsie would be by to collect Darren. It was another of their traditional things together. I was diverted in my attention of watching for her when the phone rang. Ah well, no rest for the wicked they say. The voice on the phone made me smile as it was one of our oldest customers who rang to wish me a merry Christmas. Mrs Flanherty, used to run a pie shop around the corner from the office before she retired ten years earlier. She still called every Christmas to talk with me for a few minutes. It was one of those things one sort of took for granted but would know immediately and felt bereft if you never received the call. For my gesture, I always sent her a box of her favourite Belgian chocolates that would arrive late in the afternoon on Christmas Eve before she was whisked off by her son and his family to a family celebration. I was always happy that she still had someone to care enough to invite her.
Completing the call, I looked up at the clock. It was odd that Elsie hadn’t arrived yet since you could generally set your clock by her arrival times. A discreet cough caught my attention and I looked across at the open door of the office. It wasn’t Elsie but Jean and I had that feeling once again of being giddy and the blood rushing to my face. She was dressed casually in jeans, a UCLA sweatshirt and a barn jacket and I was taken with how really warm and open she looked.
“I’m sorry Jean I didn’t realise that you were there. Are you here for Darren? I’ll find him for you,” I finally asked. I awkwardly stood up and then sat down again as she closed in on my desk then casually sat on the edge.
“No rush Laura. Elsie told me he enjoyed his catching up with the guys this afternoon. I figured I would give her a break. She’s suffering badly from morning sickness and is taking a nap.” Jean’s voice held that laughter I was coming to expect and I felt happy again for no reason other than she was here.
“He does that’s true. Did you bring Clancy with you?” I asked more for something to say although I did genuinely want to know about the child.
The sparkle in Jean’s eyes mesmerised me as she chuckled, “Can’t go out and see her new friend Laura and not take her with me. There would be a penance to pay if I had. She’s in the car. I thought I’d better check that it was ok to bring her in before I did.”
I laughed self-consciously at her comment. “I thought she’d be out with her cousins making snowmen and stuff.”
“Well, she would but the twins are somewhat preoccupied with their own friends at the moment. I have that dubious playtime when we get back.” Merriment danced in her eyes. “Unless, of course, you want to volunteer.” Her voice was nonchalantly but I did think she genuinely wanted my answer.
I looked down at my clothes, my sober skirt suit and brogues that had held up fine for the walk from the car but a snowman expedition and very likely a snowball fight wouldn’t be fitting. “Maybe another time, I’m not exactly dressed for…”
This time Jean stopped me before I could refuse, “I’ll drop Darren off and then I can come to your place and pick you up. I was thinking about taking Clancy to an early dinner afterwards and letting my brother have a little private time with his wife before they are engulfed in the entertaining frenzy again. Does that sound like a good idea Laura?”
How could I possibly resist as she looked at me with those warm eyes and that gentle smile, then there was Clancy… “Ok, I’ll find Darren and I’ll write down my address for you.”
In the time it took for Darren to complete his circuit and join us, I spent time talking to Clancy. Or perhaps, listening was a better word to her constant chatter about what Santa was going to bring tonight but, of course, only if she was good. When they left I locked up the office and most years I’d be wishing away the few days we were closed but not this time. This time things were different. I just had to find out if whatever it was that was making me happy would last. I left the office, got in my car and headed home. I hoped that I’d look as good in my denims and sweatshirt as Jean did but, you can’t have everything.
+ + +
We had a marvellous time. My facial muscles had never had such a work out as I laughed at Clancy’s antics, not to mention her mother’s. Jean had a gloriously childlike way of enjoying the moment. I could understand that perfectly when I saw her with her daughter. They were a team bound by love and blood not to mention necessity. A faint memory that came out of the blue as I watched Clancy snowball her mom reminded me of me a long time ago. I recalled having a similar experience with my dad. His face was hazy, which was to be expected after so long, but the tenderness and affection that glowed in my memory-scape told me everything I needed to know - he loved me. I felt the tears welling up as I watched Clancy being tickled after a snowball had hit her mother in the chest with a direct hit. I wiped away the tears and smiled.
Suddenly I felt the smack of snow against my arm. “Ha, gotcha,” Jean said laughingly.
“I’ll have you know I can throw a pretty mean snowball myself,” I said as I bent over and scooped up a handful of snow fashioning it into a ball while I straightened up. Smack! “I hit her square in the chest.”
“Is that all you’ve got?” she said as she launched another in my direction.
Artfully I dodged it one only to find myself hit in the arm again but this time by Clancy. “I see it is two against one.” I laughed and scooped up more snow and the game began.
Finally we all sat down in the snow spent but laughing with each other. As I watched Jean brushing the snow off her daughter I smiled softly knowing that if I never experienced anything like it again I would be eternally grateful to these two people for coming into my life even if for a brief time. They had helped me remember what this time of year was all about and that I didn’t have to be afraid to enjoy myself. I had time to change my life and have myself a merry Christmas.
As we travelled to the small diner I’d recommended for our dinner the darkness of the early evening began and there was the magic of the lights that had been strung around the town.
“Look at that one Clancy. Santa is on the roof and going into the chimney.”
“That isn’t the real Santa Laura.”
Both Jean and I laughed. “I know but it is a good likeness.” I winked at Jean.
“See those lights they are beautiful. Someday I’d like to put up a display like that,” Jean said wistfully.
“Oh, Mommy, look at that one.” Clancy squealed as she saw and entire window filled with animated Christmas characters.
I couldn’t remember ever enjoying looking at the lights with the wonder of a small child’s eyes. At one stage, with Clancy glued to the side window of the car, I looked across at Jean and the gaze she directed in my attention made my stomach flip. Obviously my own version of bonding with her daughter was something she approved of big time.
The diner was another success. When we entered the diner I saw Clancy’s eyes fill with wonder as she took in all the various costumes the each of the staff was wearing. Stevie, one of the waitress’, had told me earlier in the week that they all dressed in fancy dress on Christmas Eve. Clancy was even more delighted when a small box was placed in front of her.
“Mommy, is this for me?” she said solemnly.
Jean looked at the waitress who nodded. “Yes, I believe it is.”
Clancy tore into the box and laughed when she took out a miniature deer with a red nose. “Look, its Rudolph.”
Jean just laughed and ruffled the girl’s hair. “This is a marvellous place Laura. I’m so glad you brought us here.” The look in her eyes told me all I needed to know – she was glad to be with me.
“I’m so glad you invited me. Thank you,” I said softly.
Her eyes sparkled and the familiar sound of her laugh seemed to fill the room. “No thank you. It’s been a long time since I have laughed so much.”
I rubbed my shoulder. “You have a pretty good arm with the snowball.”
Our meal was placed in front of us and Clancy’s face lit up. “Chicken fingers and fries…my favourite.”
Jean and I both shook our heads happily.
The meal was a wonderful topping for that afternoon.
Clancy was asleep virtually in my arms in the back seat as we neared my house and I tried to extricate myself from her small grip. Jean helped to remove her from my lap and the touch of her hand as it accidentally touched my breast had me catching my breath. The sensations that ran through my body should be banned. I didn’t dare look into Jean’s eyes as I climbed out of the back of the vehicle. She placed Clancy carefully on the backseat and managed, though how I didn’t know, to encase her in one of the seatbelts.
We stood on the sidewalk. “Thanks for the lovely time. I really enjoyed myself.” I finally said.
“You’re welcome. It was a wonderful outing,” she said before placing her hand on my arm and leaning forward slightly to kiss me fleetingly on the lips. “Goodnight Laura.”
The revving of the car that left my driveway brought me out of the stupor I was in. Then, like a dream, my fingers tenderly stroked my lips that were still tingling from hers.
Oh my god I think I’m in love!
+ + +
Entering my house, I looked around and saw nothing that would signify this time of year, not a tree or trimming to welcome you home. I closed my eyes briefly as I thanked god that Clancy or Jean hadn’t entered my home. What would I have said? Peering at the clock in the hallway, I saw it was only six-thirty and if I hurried I could get to the mall three blocks away and buy a few items.
Picking up my car keys, I quickly drove to the mall and was amazed at how many people were still shopping. Obviously more than me had left it to the last minute. I bought a fibre optic tree that would stand quiet nicely in my hallway and a few other Christmas ornaments that could be placed strategically around the lounge -in particular, a two foot tall Santa that jiggled his sack and sang ten different Xmas tunes.
Next, I went along to the supermarket and bought a small ham and a breast of turkey and a few other festive goodies. As I shopped the euphoric feeling that I was having increased until I felt that I might burst along with the fully loaded shopping bags I was storing in my car. I was about to climb in the car and leave when I saw a small shop that sold all kinds of trinkets and gifts. Walking towards the window, I saw a snow globe that looked just like the picture in my mind of the Nicholby’s home a couple of nights before. It was a beautiful creation and next to it was a much smaller one depicting children playing in the snow and throwing snowballs. The decision was made. I bought them both and satisfied, I drove home. When I got there I placed the items I’d purchased around the house and put on the Christmas CD I’d bought. If nothing else this year, I could say I’d made the effort.
As I sat looking around satisfied with my decorations, I heard a car drive up outside my house and footsteps crunched on the newly laid snow. The doorbell rang and I was puzzled as to who would be calling on me at nine-thirty. Opening the door, I was surprised and happy to see my visitor.
Jean stood there and smiled. “Hi Laura, I’m sorry to bother you but I was thinking that maybe you might change your mind about tomorrow?” She looked at me with hope in her eyes as she fingered with her keys.
I tried to find the words to answer her.
“Hey, look, I’m sorry I disturbed you. This isn’t normal for me to hassle anyone.” Apologetically she turned to leave and then I galvanised myself into action. Reaching out to stop her, my hand felt hers and it was as though I was touching molten lava - the heat of our connection mentally seared me.
“No, please Jean, don’t go,” I implored. She turned back to me and this time that sparkle and confidence was back in her face and her eyes filled with joy as she nodded. “If the invitation is still good I’d love to accept but I do have one request.”
A beaming smile was my answer as she quickly said, “anything you name it.”
“I was wondering if you and Clancy might come over here to lunch or dinner or …spend the day after Christmas if you’re not going back to California that is.” I’d forgotten for a moment that she wasn’t living here permanently and the thought made me sad to think that I might lose her from my life so soon.
A wonderful sound came from Jean as she smiled in gratitude. “We’d love to come over for the day. Do you think you can cope with a six year old going on twenty and a thirty-five year old going on ten?”
Oh yes I’d cope anytime . “Why don’t you come inside for a something warm to drink? You must be freezing out there?”
For a moment she hesitated and then she smiled. “I’d love to.”
As I took the coat that was dripping from the snow, I had to admit that my trip to the mall had been one of my better decisions. She smiled and complimented me on the decorations. Ten minutes later she was snuggled into my old leather armchair with a steaming cup of hot chocolate in her hands. She looked like she belonged right there. I must have been staring because she gazed at me and a tender smile creased her lips. “You make great chocolate.”
“Thanks, it’s all in the wrist action.”
“Really” as her eyebrows flicked upwards in a suggestive manner.
The expression placed me at a slight disadvantage until it dawned on me that she might not quite be thinking on the same lines as I was, forcing me to splutter out embarrassedly, “you know with the froth maker.” A secret smile and twinkling eyes didn’t have me fooled. She was teasing me and I’d fallen for it, “You’re teasing me Jean.”
“Absolutely.” Her eyes sparkled in merriment. “You don’t mind do you?”
Taking a deep breath, I grinned back. “No at all, but only by you.” I closed my eyes wondering why I said such an idiotic remark. Then I heard Jean stand up and place her cup on the table. I was so insecure at that moment that I didn’t really think properly and figured that she was leaving because of my stupid comment. I kept my eyes shut.
Then something magical happened. When she knelt in front of me and took my hands my eyes flared open and were captured by hers. “Laura, it’s taken me a long time to find someone I’d like to spend time getting to know. If you don’t mind, I’d like to get to know you better.”
My heart did crazy things as the words sank in. Do I want to get to know her better? Try and stop me! “I’d like that too Jean.”
This time her arms didn’t go around my waist they encircled my back and she pulled me close and our lips met in a sensual kiss. All my expectations of what kissing was going to be like with someone you loved were blown out of the window with its intensity. We broke away but remained close for a while until she laughed softly. “I’ll not rush you Laura but right now I’d be lying if I didn’t say my idea of a wonderful Christmas present would be to spend the night making love with you. Not tonight though because I meant what I said about not rushing and I do need to go and help with the presents.”
We’d known each other less than three days and it never occurred to me that I could fall in love, never mind so quickly. It all fell into place perfectly and if it didn’t work out I’d call this my Christmas of firsts because I was going to ensure it wouldn’t be my last. She was right - rushing this moment would be stupid. I knew in my heart there would be the right time and it wouldn’t be eons away. “You’re right about rushing. It has only been three days since we met.”
Jean grinned at that as she kissed me again and then winked. “Actually it isn’t the first time.” My face must have been a tabloid of various expressions as she laughed the adorable sound that I realised I wanted in my life forever. “The day before I left for college about seventeen years ago I came over to the office to see Darren and you were there. I thought you were the sexiest woman I’d ever seen in my life. If things had been different and I wasn’t off to school the next day and not terrified you’d turn me down I’d have made a play for you then.” She chuckled again as the memory struck her as amusing.
Strangely enough, being called sexy had numbed my senses to everything but the glow it made me feel. Her other words finally filtered into my consciousness. “You were terrified?”
“Of course.” She laughed self-consciously. “You were so hot and older I didn’t think you would give the time of day to a teenager.”
“I’d only been with Darren for six months then.”
“I know.” She winked at me and kissed me again. “Have you ever had a special someone in your life?”
It took me a long time to answer for I really didn’t know what to say. “No, I never found anyone that interested me.” I sighed. “I’m not real comfortable with people.”
Her eyebrows creased in the centre. “Why?”
“My parents abandoned me at a young age.” I shrugged. “No one wants an older child just a baby so I was bounced around from one foster home to another. I learned early not to trust or care about others.”
“I’m sorry to hear that Laura. I know my brother and Elsie think the world of you.”
“They are good people.” I needed to end the direction of the conversation for I was feeling very uncomfortable. “What about you?”
For a long moment Jean got the far away look that she had the night of the party. “Darren has tried to get us here for Christmas for years and I always made up excuses not to come.”
“Lucky you.” I laughed. “I don’t get the choice to spend time with my family.”
“This year he said, you need to come and be with family Jean. And I told him that being with his co-workers wasn’t exactly family. Then he said the most remarkable thing.”
“What was that?”
“He started rattling off the guest list and when he said Laura Ramsey will be here it was like magic to my ears and I heard nothing else he said. I knew you still worked for my brother but…well old fears…you know.” She sighed. “I really need to get back and help out.” She stood up and stretched her body. The liquid eruption that the motion set off had me almost begging for her to make love to me but I didn’t.
I stood up too and we walked down the hall. As I passed her the coat I asked, “What time tomorrow?”
Jean gave me a smile that should have melted the snow accumulating outside because it thawed every damn nerve in my body. “You can be there as early as you want. We have lunch around three but I’m hoping you don’t leave it to the last minute.”
“Don’t worry I won’t,” I said. We sealed that with another kiss before she left.
As I picked up the mug of spent hot chocolate that she had been drinking, I saw the shade of lipstick on the rim and like a goof I placed my lips on the transfer. Laughing at myself for such a foolish action, I thought next thing you know I’ll not be washing the smudge off.
Even though it was early, I decided to go to bed. My logic for that was that early to bed early to rise that way I could go over to the Nicholby’s sooner rather than later.
+ + +
I would have thought that everyone at the Nicholby’s home would be surprised when I actually showed up early, but for some curious reason they were not. The house was filled with the true spirit of Christmas as everyone seemed to revel in the happiness of family. I always had the feeling that the festivities at their home would be glorious and I was not disappointed. It seemed so natural, as everyone welcomed me into the circle of their family as one of their own. I’d never laughed so much as I did at the antics of the twins and Clancy. Christmas was definitely a day for children but as I looked around the room at the serene looks of happiness on everyone’s faces I knew it was for adults too. Not even the odd nudge from Darren, could waver my enjoyment of the day.
The marvellous lunch was consumed with gusto until all the adults sat silently savouring not only the fare but the day. The children were not as satisfied and challenged each other to a snowball fight and donned their coats to go outside.
When Elsie and Jean stood up to clear away the dishes, I offered to help.
“No, we’ll take care of it,” Elsie said motioning me to sit back down.
“But, it’s the least I can do after…” This time Jean patted my shoulder. “Stay here and keep Darren company. We won’t be long.” Her touch sent shivers through my body and I really wanted to go just be near her but I complied. Looking at the man I smiled wondering why his eyes were dancing in merriment.
Picking up his glass of wine, Darren stood up and moved to a chair next to mine. Darren sipped from his wine and asked softly, “Are you enjoying yourself Laura?”
I smiled warmly at him. “I’ve had a marvellous time. Thank you for the invitation Darren. You have a wonderful family. You’re very lucky.” I shrugged and mused, “I don’t know why I never took you up on the offer before.”
His jolly chuckle had me staring at him expectantly wondering what the joke was. “Perhaps its one person in particular that is wonderful?”
“Don’t be silly, you all are.” I defended my position but we both knew it was futile. My eyes betrayed me as they kept trailing to the doorway watching for Jean to reappear.
His eyes turned serious and looked questioningly at me. “Do you remember once saying to me that you’d never settle down until you found someone like me?” He cocked his head as he waited for the answer.
How did he recall that? It was years ago. “Vaguely, why?”
“Well the nearest you’re going to get is in the room next door,” he said nodding towards the kitchen. “By the way, she’s moving her itinerary forward to arrive here by the end of spring.” His eyes twinkled again. “I think a certain party has influenced that decision.” His smile beamed across his face.
I mirrored his smile as I felt a wave of heat cross my face. He’d given me a present that, although unexpected, was fantastic news. “Surely Jean has her own mind,” I said softly. “I’m sure she’d already decided.”
Darren’s kind face softened even more. “Don’t sell yourself short Laura.” Trust me she has talked about coming back for the last five years since Ellen died.” He patted my hand as if to soften the blow but silence fell between us at the mentioned Jean’s deceased lover. “Then,” he continued, “Jean opened the door and you walked in Laura. I’ve never seen her so animated. I suspect Clancy picked up on that too. I’m sure that is why she chose to be your little helper the evening of the party. She wanted to show her mom her approval as well.”
I was astounded that such a small gesture by the precious child had so many facets to it. Clancy was a great child that anyone would be proud to have in their family. “What about you, do you approve?” I watched for any sign that he wasn’t completely happy with his sister’s choice. It was obvious, I think, that she might be interested in me, well more than interested. I had his answer without words as he beamed that wonderful smile and hugged me close.
Whispering in my ear he said, “It was about time. I’ve attempted to get you two together for the last three years here at Christmas.” He chuckled softly. “Neither of you would co-operate at the same time.” Pulling back slightly he smiled. “And look what happened when you two finally did show up. I couldn’t be happier.”
I could feel the blush grow stronger and was saved any further embarrassment as Elsie and Jean arrived with smiling faces asking if anyone could join the group hug. Soon we were all laughing and hugging each other. Of course the hug from Jean held special meaning for me.
I had a wonderful time and when it was time for me to leave I invited everyone to join me at my home the next day for lunch.
“I’m sorry Laura but we are going to my sister’s tomorrow,” Elsie said apologetically.
I wasn’t sure if the excuse was a ruse or not but I was grateful.
+ + +
Having Jean and Clancy in my home made everything worthwhile somehow. When I gave them each a present after lunch I could see differing expressions in their eyes. Clancy was expectant and ripped the paper off immediately. She saw what it was and gave it a shake so the snow whipped around the globe. After several shakes she left her seat and came over to hug me and place a wet kiss on my cheek. “Thank you Laura,” she said joyfully.
Jean, on the other hand, looked self-conscious and at first didn’t seem to want to open the box. Her eyes captured mine as she shook her head. “You shouldn’t have,” she said tenderly.
I knew she was upset at my buying a gift for her since she hadn’t bought me one. What she didn’t know was that from the moment I met mother and daughter they had given me the best gift of all - the knowledge that I was capable of feeling wondrously happy in other people’s company.
When she finally opened the box she smiled, as she too shook the snow then turned it over and wound the switch and I’ll be Home for Christmas began to play. She smiled. “That’s so appropriate.” She placed her snow globe on that table and gave me a tender smile before whispering, “thank you,” as she gently fingered the globe. “It will always remind me of this wonderfully unexpected time we’ve shared.”
“Mom that’s not good enough,” Clancy intervened into our magic moment.
Jean looked at her daughter perplexed. “What isn’t good enough Clancy?”
Then out of the mouth of babes, “Mom you have to give Laura a proper thank you like I did.”
I coughed at the comment as I didn’t want to hurt the child’s feelings by laughing at the strangled look on Jean’s face - it was a picture. Secretly I hoped that Jean would follow her daughter’s suggestion. It didn’t take long for Jean to get over the surprise of her child’s comment and act.
She sprang up from her chair and in seconds I was engulfed in a hug similar to the one Clancy gave me. The feeling of Jean’s curvaceous body against mine nearly sent me into a melodramatic faint. As the hug was similar to Clancy’s, the kiss was different altogether. Our lips met in a passion that we mutually felt ignite our bodies.
We broke away only when we heard Clancy in the distance bemoan, “Yuck, I can’t believe your still kissing.” We all laughed. Clancy then went to the mechanical Santa and switched it on. Soon the house was filled with tinny renditions of Christmas songs until it finally stopped with a last ho ho .
Jean and I sat together and watched as Clancy seemed to explore every nook and cranny of my home. She squealed when she came across my cat, Molly. On the other hand, Molly was not as delighted and took her first opportunity to slide out of the child’s grip and find her special hiding place.
As dark approached, we made sandwiches and all sat in front of the television to watch Its a Wonderful Life. Clancy took her place between us and munched happily on her sandwich.
Watching that particular movie with Jean and Clancy took on a new meaning for me. “Why are you two crying?” Clancy asked when the movie was over. Jean and I just sniffled and hugged the child.
Not too long after that, Clancy fell asleep in her mother’s lap. “Would you like to lay her in my bed? I it might be more comfortable for both of you.”
Jean stroked the child’s hair. “Would you think me strange if I told you that this has been a very special day for me?”
Our eyes met in mutual understanding. “If you are strange Jean then I am in good company.”
Her eyes left mine. “We really should be going.”
My stomach did a few summersaults as I reached for her hand. “Please don’t go yet.” I didn’t want the day to end or see them leave.
Carefully she stood up holding Clancy close to her. “Which way is your room?”
“Come on I’ll show you.”
Jean smiled when her eyes rested on the bed and the small brown lump resting there. She turned to me. “You really do have a Ralph.”
Somewhat self-consciously I scooped up the battered old brown teddy bear which had no eyes and floppy ears from repeated sewing. “Yeah, it is all I have of my family. Supposedly I was clutching it when they found me on the orphanage doorstep.” I grinned. “Until the other night it really didn’t have a name. I think Ralph suits him don’t you?”
I saw a brilliant smile cross Jean’s face. “Yes, it suits him just fine.” She patted Ralph on the head before carefully placing Clancy on the bed. She bent over and gently kissed her daughter’s cheek. “Good night sweetheart.”
Once Clancy was tucked in we went back to the lounge and sat back down on the couch It wasn’t long before we were nestled in each other’s arms enjoying the moments together. We kissed softly until our passion and desires flared and we may have gone further but the sound of a sleepy Clancy stopped us. “Mommy, are we staying all night?”
Jean laughed heartily. “Not this time sweetie, but soon.” She got up and engulfed the child in her arms and kissed her head. “I guess we’d better go.”
I ruffled Clancy’s hair. “This little one needs to sleep in a familiar bed.” Smiling I added, “let me get your coats.”
With Clancy in her arms, Jean said, “I have to leave first thing in the morning Laura. If I call you when I get home will that be ok with you? ” Her eyes were filled with expectation and hope.
With a beaming smile I answered, “If you don’t I will be hounding Darren for your number.”
“I need to close my practice and sell the house. As soon as that is taken care of we are going to move back here. Maybe we can make some plans for my return when we talk.”
My heart filled with a joy I had never known. "I would like that." I think the smile on my face was kinda goofy when I spoke next. "If you need a place to stay you're always welcome here." I shrugged. "I guess you'd stay with Darren."
"I'd rather stay with you." Then Jean carefully manoeuvred her daughter and moved as close as possible to kiss me. "Thank you," she whispered.
"No, thank you." I kissed her once more. "Have a safe trip."
"We will." She smiled and I opened the door. One last kisss before she headed for her car. I didn’t want to let them go. Deep in my heart I knew that next year at this time we wouldn’t part at all. Although we hadn’t said it, we both knew that in our hearts we had found love.
As they left and I watched them drive away, I looked up to the skies and sent a silent prayer upstairs thanking whomever for my Christmas present…love and a family!
The End