Chapter 1

Two entwined bodies crashed into the locked door. One of the four hands fumbled to get the key into the lock and to turn the knob. The hand managed to undo the uncooperative barrier and threw it open crashing with a resounding bang against the sidewall. The two bodies wrapped tightly around each other awkwardly waddled through the open door far enough for a foot to snake out and kick it closed.

They moved as one back against the door to support the raging lust that possessed them. One short, one tall? It mattered not the height as the small blonde pressed her prey against the wooden obstacle and her knee between the brunette's legs. She felt the molten heat radiating through two pairs of jeans. The blonde released the woman briefly as she quickly grabbed the panting woman's shirt and roughly pulled it over her head.

Iridescent eyes riveted to the creamy mounds of breasts before her. She worshipped them and slowly ran her open palms across the red covered breasts. Her lover for the night gasped and squirmed beneath her. The blonde was not in a hurry and took her time.

Her lustful gaze pranced across the tops of firm breasts and her palms felt the hardened nipples beneath. Fingers traced the soft path across the tip of one breast, down the deep cleavage separating them and up the other side to the top of the breast.

"Beautiful," the blonde whispered sight fixated upon the delicacies before her. She absently licked her lips.

She bent slowly and kissed the tops of each breasts much to the extreme delight of her lover. The woman's hands came behind and buried themselves in the blonde hair already tussled in the elevator on the way to the apartment. The brunette ground herself deeper into the blonde as a low moan escaped her lips. The blonde tasted the tops of the breasts leaving not an inch un-kissed, not licked or sucked. There against the door, she made love to the brunette's nipples alone.

"Come on lover," the brunette said and took her companion by the hand. "I'll give you a tour some other time. Right now, there's only one room you need to see." She led her down the short hall to the darkened room at the end.

The brunette stopped before the blonde and smirked seductively as she could. The blonde reached around her lover and slowly removed the red satiny material. She gasped as meaty flesh tumbled free of their restraint and her head shook from sided to side in covetous awe. She let the bra dropped absently from her fingertips unto the floor. Her hand rose to gently cup each healthy breast in a palm. As the blonde's thin fingers surrounded the firm breasts, brown eyes rolled back and closed. The brunette experienced the ginger knead and the light almost rhythmic squeezes to the end of the nipple, a pinch and then the kneading began again. The brunette groaned her approval and arched her back into the touch wanting more.

She kicked off her cumbersome shoes frantically and fumbled with the button of her jeans. She momentarily regretted the move as the blonde had to let go of her to do so. Dark green eyes peered at her through a visible sexual haze and her chest heaved uncontrollably up and down as if she had just run a marathon. Soon the brunette lay upon the bed beckoning the blonde to join her. Slowly the blonde removed her shoes and socks and made her way upon the bed, crawling, stalking her prey to be feasted upon. The woman lay there waiting, wanting, legs apart and beseeching the blonde to come to her. Shirt and pants, the brunette was not particular at the moment. She was, however, curious as to why her companion had chosen to remain clothed.

Kneeling before the brunette, the blonde kissed her deeply, passionately, and thoroughly savoring her mouth. She tasted her neck leaving small nibbles in blazing trails across the collarbone and across the tops of the breasts that already knew love this night. Weight upon her knees, the blonde sat hunched and devoured the left breast with her tongue and mouth while her hand massaged and pumped the right.

"God, you're making me so hot. You love them don't you?" the brunette breathed and felt the heat rise from the attention the blonde lavished upon them. She never had anyone love her upper half so much. It was as if the breasts were all that mattered to the smaller woman. "Take your clothes off baby."

In response, the blonde shifted her attention from suckling and nipping the left breast to the right while the other hand massaged the left. She finally seemed to have had her fill and leaned back on her heels. A satisfied smirk upon her face reminded the brunette of a vampire after satisfying their blood -thirst. Her eyes were barely open and she seemed to sway in place.

As the brunette's hips squirmed possessively against the blonde's jean clad leg, she left a wet glistening trail and luxuriated in the roughness of the fabric against her center. Just as the brunette raised her hands to lovingly touch the blonde's breasts as she had received, a pair of small hands shot out to trap her wrists in a near crushing grip.

"Don't!" The vampire-like gaze froze the woman beneath her.

"I want to touch you."

"Let me show you how first," she tried to smile but it conveyed only her apprehension at being touched.

The blonde slowly released her grip and guided the woman's arms back above her head. Her hands tracked down to the full breasts that jutted at her. She bent and placed a kiss upon each nipple before letting her tongue outline the contour of muscle and flesh on her way to the darkened patch below.

Without warning, her mouth locked upon the brunette's engorged center while and her tongue began its assault The sudden fierceness of the move brought the woman's back inches off the bed eyes wide and then slammed shut. Mouth working diligently, green eyes twinkled at the flex of abdominal muscles that rose through the intense sensation. She fell back upon the bed and her hips soared into the air where she held suspended. The earsplitting yell blasted from between the woman's lips and her body rigid. She was immobile for what seemed eternity before dropping back upon the bed. The brunette's body appeared to convulse with orgasmic tremors that made her voice quiver throughout her scream.

The blonde moved upon the panting body and once again devoured the breasts with the added flavor of her lover upon her lips and face. Each one was adored equally before sitting back upon her heels and shivered through her own small orgasm beside the exhausted brunette.

She stroked the lovely face wishing she could partake all the brunette had to offer. Her hands drifted once down the lithe body and over the large breasts waiting for it to happen. You are truly lovely, marveled the blonde.

The ringing sounded at her waist and she sighed heavily. I need to give myself more time with women like this. The blonde retrieved the cell phone and looked at the number. The bliss she felt immediately replaced by the rehearsed worried frown.

"What is it?" the brunette asked breathlessly.

"I have to go," the blonde whispered. "I'm on call." The brunette saw the wrinkled brow and scowl and knew for certain that the blonde detested the interruption. She was partially right, the blonde was angered by the interruption but not for the reasons she perceived.

"Nooo," she whined and reached for the breasts again but the blonde had already moved to the end of the bed. "But wait." Puzzled, the naked woman sat erect and watched the blonde put on her socks and shoes. Her body tingled from the exquisite orgasm she had endured and desperately wanted more throughout the night. "You can't go now."

"I'm sorry; I have no choice," the blonde replied flatly and stood. She felt the painful throbbing behind the seam of her jeans and knew the ride home was going to be damn near unbearable. "I've so very sorry." She stepped to the side of the bed, deftly avoiding the woman's seeking hands. The kiss was intense but short.

"Will you call me?"

"You bet." She turned at the door and winked at the naked beauty.


Out in the heat of the summer night, Devon Walsh walked to her car parked across the street from the apartment building. Safely buckled behind the wheel, she inhaled the scent of the brunette upon her face, her hands and clothing. She shifted uncomfortably in the seat for a position that did not cause the seam to rub against her. She reached for her belt and pulled the cell phone into view. Regrettably, she flipped it open and expertly pressed the buttons to reach the alarm clock function. A few more buttons and she deleted the timer she had set an hour ago.

She sighed with disgust and threw the device upon the seat. She took a deep breath; the aroma of the brunette soured her mouth. It was always like this a burning hunger that implored her to step through the loneliness that caged her with a few hours of nightlife. She tolerated the jarring music for the chance to assuage her sometime ravenous sexual urges with the goal of spending an hour or so with a woman whose name she did not care to remember. She groaned as the as the seam of her jeans let her know that she did not give herself enough time to finish with the woman she had picked up at the Tavern. She believed that she could get in the woman's door, quench the fire between both of their legs and get out before the subject of breakfast ever arose. Some nights like tonight, she did not give herself enough time.

Devon checked her rearview mirror and eased into the flow of traffic toward her home on the Southside.



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Chapter 2


At the rear of her combination convenient store and video rental she cleverly called Walsh's Video Mart, Devon blankly stared out of the large window of her office. She had a wonderful view of the park across the street from the plaza where her store resided. It was a stroke of genius actually. When she had discovered the location by happenstance, her vision was immediately born. It was perfect: a small strip mall on the Southside of the city just near the highway and on a heavily commuted traffic route.

In the five years she'd been at this location, Devon witnessed the unnerving turnover in businesses within the strip - clothing stores, pre-owned videogame shops and sports equipment sellers - even a restaurant and wireless cell phone stores had come and gone.

That's an idea, she thought suddenly. Smiling at the lure of more customers in or enticing those already in the there shopping. "It could have its own entrance or maybe near the video counter anyway to reduce potential theft," she pondered aloud.

Devon's eyebrows rose to the tip of her short blonde hair pulling a full grin with it. She swiveled back and forth in the comfortable office chair thought about the new cell phone display area she would create until the flash of a confused and naked brunette swirled in full color before her eyes.

Her body hummed its betrayal to life. For the last week she had effectively suppressed the vivid images that reminded her of what was and what could not be. Devon leapt from her chair to her feet and stomped to the door. The short hair bounced with each sway of her arms and placement of each step. She would walk through her entire store searching for the perfect spot for the cell phone booth. She would do anything to prevent her mind from reliving the many passionless encounters and the impossibility of ever being touched.

Walsh's Video Mart, a.k.a. "WVM" was divided neatly into two realms. One side was the market, great for picking up those last minute needs on the way home or after you had picked out your videos from the other side of the store. A wide isle separated the two halves and was the entryway into the store. Once inside the huge sliding glass doors, either you turned left to shop for groceries or turned right to get movies and video games. Devon owned two locations, this one on the Southside and another on the West. To make her life simpler, Devon hired a manager for each side of her stores.

Devon paused in the last isle before she entered the market and surveyed the area. Plenty of customers were milling about and shopping for their needs, a sight of which she always approved. She glanced to the floors and down several aisles. All were clean and barrier-free. She made her way back to the separation lane towards the video side, when her eyes landed upon the counter girl openly flirting with the young man in line. Then she kissed him. This was something of which she did not approve.

Devon peered closer and did not recognize the woman. Must be a new hire by Greg, she thought. All of her store managers had the authority to hire and fire for their divisions once authorization was received from her. Obviously, she did not meet all of her employees though she would have liked to greet them all upon initial hire. Sometimes not doing so gave her the advantage and the opportunity to test customer service, like now.

"Hello ma'am," the young girl beamed, her brows knitted in concern. "Did you find everything alright?" Devon played along to see what the girl was like. She raised her hands indicating that she obviously did not have any rentals in her hands. "Maybe there is something I can help you with?"

"Possibly. Do you have any adult films?"

"Adult films, ma'am?" She shifted her weight and looked puzzled for a moment then blushed profusely. "Ooh those. I aahh? I'm not sure. Let me go find someone and ask, okay?" She pressed several buttons on the electronic register before she turned and headed down the aisle in search of someone.

Devon nodded to herself, Very good. She was pleasant, helpful, and not pushy. You might be able to keep your job after all. She turned around and observed the neatness of the shelves, appealing displays of recent releases and the entire organization of the place. She tilted her head to the side and listened to the soft rock station that filtered from the muzak. Not too low, not too loud, good station.

The girl returned within with Greg and a tall woman in tow. The girls hands were gesturing and her mouth chattered until, Greg looked up at the customer. "Can I help you miss?" He smiled at his boss and placed his hands on his hips.

"Yes you can. You body language says that you are annoyed at being disturbed." She returned his smile. Of all the managers, she liked Greg the most. He was honest, loyal, and straightforward in his thinking. He also shared her vision for the store and this helped tremendously when it came to customer service and presentation. He also had a baby face for a thirty-five year old father of four. He could also charm the pants off anyone except her. "Am I disturbing you Greg?"

"No Devon," he replied with little amusement, he heard and comprehended the irritation in her voice. "I was just showing Victoria around WVM."

"Socialize on your own time, not mine."

"I'll remember that Devon when I leave today, but for right now, let me introduce you to Victoria Newcombe, stock and register," he replied then extended his hand towards the irritable boss. "Devon Walsh."

The dark haired woman stepped around Greg and offered her outstretched hand. Her smile brightened to display pearly white teeth as her blue eyes twinkled mischievously. The cash register girl stood mouth ajar and hazel eyes wide.

"Nice to meet you Devon," Victoria supplied capturing the smaller hand in her larger one. Very nice indeed.

Devon felt the band of electricity flow from her fingers travel the length of her arm and spread through her chest. The room grew amazingly warm and Devon found her tongue sealed to the roof of her mouth. She fell into the depths chilling blue fire that swallowed her whole. She felt a sharp tug and her body started to lean into the handshake.

Victoria felt her heart thunder back to life. She could swear there was a smoldering flame in the palm clasped in hers. A knowing grin crept to her face as she watch the changing green eyes before her. The sense of recognition astounded her. She had never met Devon before, yet the familiarity was uncanny. Victoria knew that Devon felt it as well for the moisture that developed between their hands could not be blamed on one or the other, but was surely the product of both.

Devon slid her hand slowly out of the grasp of the unsettling Victoria and forced her attention to wide-eyed clerk. "You did wonderfully going to find help and returning so quickly for a customer. But I suggest two things; one - familiarize yourself with where the different movie genres are and two, kiss the boyfriend on your own time, not mine. Got it?"

"Yes Mrs. Walsh."

"Ms.," she held the word to emphasize her point to the girl and to Victoria, "Walsh, big difference." In dismissal, Devon turned her darkened virescent eyes upon her manager. "Greg, I have a project for you. I am considering a cell phone selling area somewhere in the store."

"Oh?" He shook from the out of the reverie he was pulled into by the two women.

"Yes. Do you think it would develop a customer base?"

"It might Devon. The other wireless stores in the plaza are gone. They had a transitional business, but steady."

"Maybe I can help you? I have some contacts in that area. I'd be more than happy to make a few calls and get you connected to them? No pun intended." Victoria offered and took a step closer to her boss.

"That would be great Victoria," Greg chimed and thought of the numerous possible contacts that Victoria would have. It would make the task less hectic and chaotic. He knew how to use a cellular telephone. He didn't have the knowledge required for the rest the project.

"It would be," her blues drank in the storeowner and held her captive, "my pleasure."

Devon couldn't stop the crimson that flared across her cheeks and spread down her neck. Those damn eyes are touching me. I feel them. Oh Lord. No Devon, she works here that means she is your employee. She chastised herself. That means that she is off limits. There are plenty of other women in the city for that.

Victoria's lips curled into a knowing grin. Ah ha, I see you Devon. Her inner child's voice taunted silently. Would you like to come out and play? "How can I reach you Devon when I have the information?" Give me your number and address and I will personally deliver it to your doorstep.

Devon lost in the sea of blue had a delayed registration of what came through the sensual lips. "Yeah?ahh?" she cleared her throat and began to back away. "Pass it on to Greg, and he'll give it to me." She turned and tried desperately to walk calmly back to her office. She needed to be behind the safety of the wooden door away from the cerulean eyes that were etched into her memory.

"Well cousin," Greg chuckled and watched his boss retreating figure. "I think you've made an impression on the boss."

"Think so? Gee, I really couldn't tell." Victoria slapped him playfully in the stomach. She looked toward the door at the end of the separation aisle and wondered what the lovely storeowner was doing behind the closed door.

Devon sat in her office chair once more and breathed deeply. She had never reacted to another woman like that before. Some part of her was not comfortable with her pulse racing in her ears and the other half marveled in the attention and connection they had shared. She didn't like what meeting the woman named Victoria made her feel. She didn't want to like how it made her feel.





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Chapter 3

Victoria crouched low to reach the bottom three shelves of the horror display. The cart next to her was full of movie returns from the weekend and she had to reshelf them to await the next renter. She had been at it for the past hour and was near boredom from the task, but a job description was a job description and this task was definitely listed on hers.

For the hundredth time she conjured the image of the storeowner to her mind and replayed their few and all too brief encounters over the past two weeks. She had seen Devon only in passing, as she would dart to and from the store. Victoria managed to catch her attention while tending to her duties or at the register waiting on customers. Several times Victoria's wave to Devon beckoned her over to where she was and each time, Devon pointed to her watch and hurried to her office or from the store. Sure their eyes had locked upon one another each time but Victoria was never able to get her to stand still long enough to have a conversation. Victoria knew she was being brushed off. So after another week of unsuccessful attempts to get Devon's attention, Victoria decided to play along.

She had seen Devon only once so far this week. From her peripheral vision, Victoria saw her move swiftly past her station headed for her office. Devon would only emerge for a soft drink from the market or to grab a bite of cooked foods that Walsh's Video Mart offered. Then she would return to the office and seclude herself there long after the market side was closed for the evening.

Victoria sensed her attraction to Devon immediately when they met. She wanted to get to know Devon Walsh. Behind those sparkling green eyes, lay something more; Victoria knew Devon felt the same, she was sure of it. The problem was how to get Devon to recognize it and give them a chance to see what it was between them. She placed the DVD upon the shelf and stood. She heard the vertebrae crackle and stretched even more. A curse for six feet of body length remaining stooped for too long.

"Oh yeah, I give up a cushy desk for this."

"Hey Vic," Greg called to her from the aisle over. "Having fun?"

"Loads."

"You're the one who said you wanted a fun job."

"Thanks for reminding me. It's not that bad really. I rather enjoy it."

"Sure you do." He grinned as she twisted to stretch.

"Greg, can I ask you something?" she hedge and studied her feet.

"Sure." He crossed the short distance. The mustache curled around his upper lip in the smirk he knew would annoy his cousin. He was puzzled that his cousin suddenly looked around the store to make sure no one could over hear them. "What is it?"

"Greg, what do you know about Devon?"

"A little. Why?"

"Greg?" she trailed off and widened her eyes to signal her cousin what information she wanted.

"Oh, I get it. You're interested huh?"

"Never mind the commentary just spill it." You can be so trying.

Greg shrugged and glanced around, "She's a very private person, Vic. She's not very warm to anyone really. I've heard rumors."

"Rumors?" Great, I've definitely been out of touch too long. My gaydar needs servicing. Hmmph, that's not all that needs servicing either.

"Just rumors. Vic, I know you'd be okay for a while financially if you weren't here, but just remember, she is your boss."

"Always looking out for me cuz."

"Since we were kids."

"Do you know what kinds of things she likes, cards or flowers? Her favorite color?" I can't believe I am asking him this.

"Vic, how the hell would I know that?"

"Find out for me."

"Oh no, I am not going to be apart of this. Brenda would kill me."

"I'll talk to Brenda," Victoria waved absently.

"No. The last time you talk me into doing something this stupid, we nearly got arrested."

"This isn't half as bad as that. Besides, we were kids."

"It was two weeks ago!"

"I got us out of that didn't I?"

"Sorry, you're on your own on this one. If you are that interested, just go up to her and talk to her."

"I know how to approach women Greg, but something about her is different."

"Chicken," he taunted and clucked.

"Hey."

He turned and walked away flapping his arms like wings and clucking like a chicken.

"Asshole," Victoria muttered under her breath.


*********


Midnight and the doors of the WVM had been locked for more than an hour. Victoria was had finished her till count long ago and just waited for the other two employees to head out the door. All night, she looked toward the office door, knowing that Devon was beyond it. Just before he left, Greg had taken Devon the receipts and a pot of tea. She had not come out for a peak or for the night.

How can she stay secluded in there all day and never come out? What am I talking about? I used to do that all the time. Hell, I've spent plenty night at the office on the couch. It's easy to do. What will I say? Aww hell, since when have I ever hesitated to speak to a woman? Since I've met Devon?.

Victoria let the last two employees out of the back door and locked all the bolts in place. Greg told her that once the front doors were locked and the alarm set, it could not be reopened until the morning with the code. So the employees left through the back door. She dimmed the lights as Greg had instructed her to do if she ever closed. Now she stood outside Devon's door with sweaty palms and parched throat.

"Come in," Devon bellowed from behind the oak desk. She looked up from the mass of papers to see Victoria standing in the doorway. He heart betrayed her once again and skipped despite the blank expression upon her face.

"Hi." Victoria quietly inhaled at the beautiful eyes behind the reading glasses perched upon Devon's nose. Her heart muscles clenched and she momentarily could not draw a deep enough breath. She was captivated at the mere sight of the woman behind her desk. She never knew that glasses could make someone so sensual. The soft glow from the desk lamp added a near golden sheen across the blondish red mane falling across one emerald eye. My god she is beautiful. Look at me. What is this?

"Hello Victoria, what can I do for you?" Devon waited for her to say something but when she did not, she began to worry that something was amiss within the store. "Is everything alright out there?"

"Oh, yes. I'm sorry. I had a blo?" She saw the rise of Devon's single eyebrow. "?lost train of thought." She quickly corrected. "I uhm, the others are gone now and the place is locked." She stepped forward for a chance to peer into those green eyes closer.

"Alright, are you ready to go?" Stay over there, please.

"Yeah, are you?"

"No, I'll be here for a while yet." Devon got to her feet and stretched.

"But you look so tired." It was out before she could stop herself. Victoria could not only take the words back nor change the tender tone they both heard. Oh well, it's out there now. Let's do this. Victoria stood just on the other side of the desk peering down upon her boss. The difference in their height was nearly five inches.

"I?thank you for your concern, Victoria." You should not be in here. I should not be in here with you. Not able to hold her gaze any longer, she couldn't help it when her own fell upon Victoria's full breasts outlined by the polo shirt. Devon quickly found the papers on her desk of prime interest. "But I really do have a lot of work left to do. I have two stores and that means twice as much."

"Doesn't your partner help you with running the business?"

"I don't have a partner."

Well that's one question answered, maybe. "Your family or significant other then?"

"Nope these are my babies." She sat heavily in the chair and rolled her head around on her shoulders to stretch the sore neck muscles.

Perfect, Victoria grinned and moved to stand behind Devon. "Let me help with that."

"Excuse me?"

"I'm great with massaging knots and kinks. May I?"

Devon eyed the tall woman suspiciously uncertain if she wanted Victoria to touch her. Something within told her she could be dangerous. She glanced upon the brilliant smile of Victoria's and felt her resistance wane. My god, she is beautiful. Those eyes?. Devon decided that a massage would do her some good and nodded her head in assent to Victoria.

At the initial contact upon her shoulder, Devon involuntarily jumped at the warmth of the large hands upon her shoulders and neck. She leaned her head forward giving Victoria more room to work on the tense muscles. She closed her eyes and allowed the soothing hands to ease the tightness.

Victoria deeply inhaled the floral scent of Devon's perfume. Her hands firmly grasped the trapezius on each side of Devon's neck and alternately squeezed with rolling of the skin. "You are a very tense person, Devon."

"Stress is inevitable. It's not easily splitting your time between two stores." Devon knew that she had been spending too much time on the Southside and was neglecting the smaller Westside location. Her managers were competent. Her managers were competent, and knew how she wanted the store to run. She still needed to be there to keep track of the financial side of things and to make the final decisions. This she observed over the past several days when she would drop in unannounced. Nonetheless, she promised herself to spend more quality time at WVM West.

"True. You should exercise and relieve some of the tension or at the very least take more frequent breaks. It is not good for the system." Her hands worked down Devon's back.

"And how would you know about stress?"

"I have had my share."

"Is that ri...OW!" She yelled and jerked forward away from the relaxing fingers. When she grabbed the edge of the desk, she inadvertently pressed the emergency call button sending a distress signal to the police station. "Shit!" She cried and snatched the telephone from the receiver.

"Sorry about that. I felt a very big knot on that shoulder blade, Devon."

"Whatever it is it hurts like hell. Besides," she replied punching in several numbers, "I pressed the emergency button. I have to cancel it." She finished entering the code waited a few seconds and then replaced the receiver.

"I can make you feel so much better if you let me." She reached out her hands to touch Devon once again. Come one, let me make you feel wonderful, Devon.

"Uhm," she stammered and stood. "Thank you, it does feel better already."

"Are you sure?" Victoria stepped closer to her boss and held her captive with her eyes.

Devon grasped the edge of the desk to keep her hands under control and from reaching out to Victoria. She melted into the cerulean sea that washed over her from the short distance. She wanted to curl her fingers into the raven tresses and feel those red lips upon her own.

Victoria watched the vein in Devon's neck pulse with the rise and fall of rapid breathing. She likes me; that is for sure. How should we proceed hmm? She questioned. What she sensed coming from Devon, was more than hesitancy. It was something that she had to yet put her finger on. A sense of fear perhaps, Victoria was uncertain and could not describe it. Why are you afraid of me Devon?

"Devon," she stepped closer reaching out slowly to touch the flushed cheek. Victoria felt the heat rise to her fingers from the smooth skin when Devon involuntarily turned into the touch. She saw the melancholy that invaded the green irises and it crippled her heart. "Will you let me out of the store please?"

Relieved that the scene would not go any further, Devon slowly inched away from the alluring woman and made a straight line for the door not turning back to see if Victoria was following her. Devon knew she was and watching her every sway of her hips. She reached the rear of the store and unlocked the many latches that secured the door.

"Will I see you tomorrow, Devon?"

"I own the place." she replied nonchalantly. Actually no, I'll be at the Westside store. You are too dangerous for me. You make me feel things I cannot afford to.

Victoria studied the woman beneath the glowing red exit sign and then shifted on one foot debating if she would say anything more. What the hell, I've already started anyway. "Devon, would you like to go get a drink or bite to eat?"

"Thank you, but no. I have a few things to do yet before the night is over."

"Some other time then?"

"Goodnight Victoria." She held the door open not seeing the hurt in Victoria's eyes.

"Goodnight Devon."

Devon closed the door in the face of Victoria as she stood there staring at her. She reattached the locks and leaned her back against the door. Victoria Newsome, I need to stay away from you.

She walked through the eerily quiet store towards the spray of light coming from her office. She exhaled heavily to release the feelings that welled inside from Victoria's touch. The flutters in her stomach had finally ceased their erratic flight pattern and her heart had almost resumed its normal rhythm. She couldn't afford to feel this way.

"I don't want to feel this, damn it!"

Devon spoke to the shadows across the room. She had not felt such a strong pull on her emotions since Marie. It had been four long years since she was seriously interested in anyone; four years since the car accident. Four arduous years since the diagnosis that changed her life completely. Devon had survived, a numbing survival nonetheless. She admitted to herself long ago that she did not live on this planet. She just existed. How could she live when her perception and self-image was half a woman? Who would want that? Who would want me? Victoria wouldn't if she really knew.


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Chapter 4

Devon watched the monitor labeled "South". The monitor was divided into four smaller screens that changed every few seconds to another part of the market or the video section of her Southside store. She had spent the majority of the past week at WVM West only going to the South location when she was sure that a certain employee was not on shift.

Tammy Coultry managed the smaller store and was quite capable of running the video portion of the business, but lacked ability to manage the market. Although it would cut into her cushion of profits, she felt it best to hire another manager and not risk costly mistakes. So much of her week at West was justified as she had scheduled interviews for the open position.

Today Devon was working the counter as an employee was a no call/no show. Devon pleasantly smiled at the little girl on the other side of the counter while thinking of something horrific to do to her employee when he finally called or showed up. She told everyone on duty that the guy was to speak only to her.

"Hello there. What can I do for you?" Devon had to lean far over the counter to see the four-year-old cherub face beneath unruly sandy colored hair.

"This please?" She offered Devon the DVD clutched between her chubby fingers.

"You want to rent this do you?" Devon took the plastic case and scanned the front, "Did you pick this one out?" The wild head nodded making more strands stick up and out as if full of static. "Excellent choice." The little girl beamed and pushed her glasses up on her nose.

"Mommy said I could have ice cream too. So hurry please."

"Sarah!" Mom chastised behind her.

Devon laughed and hurried to complete the transaction to get Sarah on her way for ice cream. Once that was done, Devon went back to the sports section where she had left the return cart. She resumed re-shelving the movies when she sensed someone behind her.

Devon turned only for her eyes to be met with a pair of bare smooth legs and tennis shoes. They traveled upward slowly resting a bit longer than they should have on the triangular spot of a pair of cut off blue jeans.

"Like those do you?" Victoria smirked at the blush that colored her boss' face. It quickly faded when her Devon's lips drew to a straight line and the green eyes clouded with anger.

"What do you want? How did you know that I was here?" She turned back to her task and ignored the pleasurable tingle that started because of those long shapely legs.

"Greg told me. Then I called to make sure you were still here. I thought that we might have lunch together."

"Sorry. Busy." She got to her feet and moved to the next aisle. "We happen to be short today."

"Would you like for me to fill in? I wouldn't mind." I'd be near you that would make it all worthwhile.

"Thank you, but no." She kept her mind focused and refused to face her attraction.

"Are you sure? I don't have anything special set for today."

"Thank you no. This gives me a chance to see how things are truly going."

"Ok, so then have lunch with me." Victoria watched her bend over and nearly groaned aloud. The contour of hips and buttocks was a heavenly sight for her. She had thought about the blonde for over a week. She still felt her within her fingertips. It wasn't enough she wanted more and so did Devon. If she would admit it that is.

"I told you we are one short and I am busy. Can't leave."

"Sure you can." She grabbed Devon's hand and tugged her behind her. "Follow me."

Victoria ignored Devon's protests and she did not let go as she led her to Devon's office door. She looked upon the furious storeowner and gave her a confident smile. It annoyed Devon even further.


Victoria opened the door and stepped back so that Devon could enter. As she did, Devon inhaled sharply at the transformation of her office. The desk had been moved back against the far wall to create space upon the floor. A large piece of green outdoor carpet was laid upon the floor with a checkered tablecloth atop of it. The plates for lunch were set for two and the wicker picnic basket off to the side on the supposed grass. Around the picnic area were three large cut outs of trees. Devon couldn't help herself and laughed.

"This is wonderful Victoria. When did you do this?" Then her brows narrowed and she turned upon Victoria. "How did you do this? My door always locked."

"Fifteen minutes ago. I saw you grab the cart and knew I had a little time?" she hedged and studied her foot as she scuffed her toe upon the floor, "to break in, sort of, and to set things up."

"Arrgh!"

"It wasn't that hard really." She gave Devon a smile that reached her eyes and made them twinkle seductively.

"Did Greg do a background check on you?" Devon made herself turn away before she fell into the fathomless blues.

"Sure did and I'm clean as a new whistle."

Devon turned back to her picnic office and smiled inward, how can I get mad at her for doing something like this for me? She did do this for me, didn't she? She felt the giddy butterflies lift to begin their flight within her soul. Just as quickly they were corralled in the net as she snatched them out of mid flight. Hesitantly, she put them back in storage. My mind is telling me that you are too dangerous Victoria but all I want is to enjoy this with you. That can't make sense.

Victoria leaned closer and whispered, "You can be angry later at me if you want, but do you like it?"

Devon blushed, feeling the hot breath upon her ear. She closed her eyes and weaved internally letting the involuntary shudders spread through her entire being. She heard the melody of the birds chirping from the CD player upon the desk. Oh my god, I could really fall for this wo?. Her smile faded. She looked down at the lunch of cheese, crackers, cut pieces of meat, grapes everything one would need for a picnic outdoors. In a small bucket of ice to the side were two one liters of flavored water and two wine glasses chilling. I can't do this.

"I can't do this," she whispered.

"Sure you can," Victoria took her hand and led her to the red and white cloth. "Have a seat before lunch gets cold." She guided her to the floor and smiled.

Devon was surprised at her body's willingness to be manipulated by Victoria. Her mind, on the other hand kept her rooted. Ok, we will do this once thing and that's it. She went to a lot of trouble to do this. Afterwards, I'll tell her I'm not interested. Right?

"This is very creative of you Victoria." Okay, she went to a lot of trouble here. Keep it short, fifteen minutes at best.

"Thanks. It always helps to have a contingency plan."

"Contingency plan?"

"Yes, you see," she sat opposite Devon and reached for a wine glass and the bottled water. "I assumed that you would not want to go to lunch with me, so I decided to have a back up plan: bring the lunch to you." She handed the flute to her boss. "I thought it was a great idea, don't you think?"

"It's original."

"Oops, almost forgot." She jumped to her feet and went the filing cabinet across the room. She turned the switch of the tabletop fan and aimed it slightly downward. Then she resumed her position upon the picnic floor. "Forgot about the gentle breeze," she laughed.

"You've thought of everything," Devon smiled against her will.

"Tried to," She smirked. "Look over there." She pointed the far corner of the green carpet. It was then Devon noticed the small group of plastic ants in a row. She laughed and shook her head. "And over there." On either side of the picnic basket was a small rubber fly and bumble bee. "Did I forget anything?"

"No, this is perfect."

"I'm glad you like it."

Victoria pretended to shoo the fly and the bee away while she reached into the top for their lunch. She handed one pack of hi-ho buttered crackers and placed the other in front of herself. She then set the bucket of chicken in the center between them.

"Regular and crispy, white and dark?. I was not sure which you preferred so I have a mixture." She grinned at Devon and opened the large bucket of chicken. "No silverware. Lunch is barbarian style." She chuckled reached in and grabbed a crispy leg.

In spite of the apprehension she felt at the moment, she couldn't help but chuckle at the Victoria's wiggling eyebrows and broad smile. "I am not wiping my hands on my pants Victoria."

"I assumed that you would not want to do that so," she placed a small basket of hand wipes next Devon. She then handed Devon a paper napkin.

Devon hesitated before reaching in and grabbing a leg herself. She took a large bite and savored the taste closing her eyes to the spices exploding upon her tongue. "This is really good. I didn't realize that I was hungry."

"It is isn't it? So tell me about Devon Walsh?" She lay on her side propped by an elbow.

"Nothing to tell. I am my own person. I own two stores. That's it."

Victoria chewed her mouthful slowly watching the woman across from her. "That is what materials Devon Walsh has. Tell me about the person."

"That's an even shorter list. I work and go home."

"You are not going to make getting to know you easy are you?"

"Why do you want to? What's in it for you Victoria?"

Why are you so guarded? "I want to get to know you better."

"Why?"

"Isn't it obvious? If not I'm more than willing to be explicit so there is no doubt or miscommunication." Gaze locked upon Devon's, Victoria placed the chicken leg upon her plate and wiped her hands and lips.

Devon fought against the draw that pulled on her once again directly towards the raven-haired beauty across the grass. She looked upon the red lips, longing to taste the spices left by the chicken. Wanting in such a way she had long since forgotten how to control.

Victoria adjusted her seat to be closer to Devon. "I have wanted to kiss your lips from the moment I first saw you, Devon. You have haunted my every moment and I feel that you are such a magnet that I can't fight the pull towards you. I have never felt this strongly for anyone."

Devon's hard swallow seemed to echo in tune with the sounds of the birds that filled her office. Victoria's lips were so closed to her own, that her eyes dropped down to them and her lips parted in anticipation.

God they are so soft, Victoria marveled. She cupped Devon's face with her palms holding her close and drinking in the taste of the lips that she dreamt of night after night. Victoria used her tongue to trace Devon's lips and ask permission to enter. Devon willing parted her lips welcoming Victoria inside. Victoria entered and searched her mouth deeply. She felt the moan escaping her throat from the succulent taste of Devon.

Devon wrapped an arm around Victoria's waist to hold on and keep herself upright. She weaved in place as the room seemed to spin. Devon did not have a reference for the emotional swirl Victoria created. Just as the moan escaped her throat her eyes snapped open as a hand encircled her right breast. She pulled her lips away from Victoria's with enough force to cause a smacking release from the suction they had upon one another. Devon quickly scrambled to her feet to put some distance between her and lustful desire.

"Devon, what's wrong?" Puzzled, Victoria panted worried for the suddenly pale Devon. She knew her own face was flushed from the heat spiraled between them. Why wasn't Devon? "What did I do wrong?"

"I think lunch is over." Devon turned her back hoping to steel herself against the ache that vibrated within.

"Devon, I don't understand." Victoria got to her feet and approached the stiff back turned to her. "Did I do something wrong? Please tell me. I'm sorry what ever it was." She placed her hands upon the small blonde's shoulder but then she pulled sharply away and went to the door.

"Thank you for lunch. But I have to get back to work." She left through the door with out another look back.

"What the hell?"

Victoria covered her mouth with her hand and looked back to their lunch. She closed her eyes and relived the time they were together. She wanted to kiss me. I felt her returning it. What the hell happened? Victoria put the food and her insects back into the picnic basket. She placed the trees around Devon's office; at least it would add some color to the drab blandness of the room. Ten minutes later she had her disastrous surprise bundled and she left.

Devon waited on a customer in the Japanese Animation section when she spied a confused and dejected Victoria emerge from her office with her bundles. She lowered her head quickly when Victoria looked her way as if pointing to something beneath the glass. She could not hide the blush that rose to her cheeks as she remembered the flames that moments ago seared them. It cannot be Victoria. I wish it could.

*********

Devon waited for her company to return from getting drinks. It was so simple tonight. She did not have to play the chase game for too long before she happened upon what's her name?Barb maybe. A little while later and they were in Barb's apartment beginning phase two of the evening's dance. That area between Devon's legs had been on fire for more than thirteen hours and she was ready to explode no thanks to a certain raven-haired beauty and her lips.

She did not want to continue to play this game for too much longer. Devon wanted to cut to the chase and get what she needed and be done with it. Her hand snaked to her side checking the position of her cell phone. Once satisfied, she loosened the button on her wrangler jeans and waited for what's her name to return.

Soon, the lovely creature returned to the living room wearing a mini terrycloth robe. Devon saw the shapely legs protruding beneath the downy material and couldn't wait to get inside where it was bound to be warm and toasty.

"Thank you Barb."

"You're welcome, Debra." Devon smiled, Barb remembered the false name that she had given her. Although she was in the next town over, Devon still did not want to take the chance of ever running into one of her conquests knowing her true identity.

Devon took a sip of the strong drink and then placed it on the end table to her right. She took Barb's away from her and placed it next to her own. Two fists wrapped around the lapels of the robe and Devon lightly pulled and guided Barb to her lap. Barb leaned the rest of the way onto Devon and kissed her deeply.

Devon released the lapels and reached inside the soft blue terrycloth rubbing the hardened nipple. She moaned and her hips ground downward. Barb's were in a motion of their own. Devon tore her lips away from Barb's and pulled the robe off her shoulders. Savagely, she took the small perky breast between her lips and sucked deeply. Barb arched her back giving Devon more to take as her eyes rolled closed.

Barb rocked against the snap of Devon's jeans. "Off?take them off" Barb panted. Reluctantly Devon broke her hold upon the breast, lifted up in the space that Barbs body allowed and pulled her jeans and underpants to her ankles. The cloth of the couch was scratchy against her buttocks, but she couldn't have cared less as long as it did not make her want to itch or scratch.

Barb returned to straddle Devon, a knee on either side of her hips on the couch. Devon resumed her gorging on the other breast that she had neglected before. She reached between their bodies and pushed her own hips forward. Barb was wet she felt the drippings seeping through her own hair. Devon groaned from the tempest within.

Her fingers played across Barb moving just past the tightness of the opening and then pulling out. Her fingers moved up and down the slickness she created as Barb's hips bucked in acceptance of Devon entering her.

Devon released her mouth upon the right breast to return to the left. She couldn't get enough. She had to have more of the woman in her mouth. She ran her teeth across the hardened nipples and flicked them with her tongue. She was hungry and Barb was feeding her frenzy.

"Oh GOD!" Barb cried as two fingers plunged deeply within and held her captive. Her hands wrapped around Devon's head and held it firmly into her chest as her body became frozen in time. Everything was still except for the trembling in her thighs that signaled orgasm was upon her.

Devon wrapped her hand firmly upon Barb's behind guiding off and on her other hand. As Barb rocked, she caused Devon's fist to rub against her own center and increase the friction bringing her closer to orgasm as well. She pumped her fingers faster in and out of Barb and until the woman reared back nearly falling save for the fact that she had her fingers dug into the couch behind Devon's head. Her body arched into strained shudders as Devon continued deeper and faster into her. The scream escaped her throat filled the silence of the room and soon was joined by Devon's own lust-filled screams.

Devon was amazed as she lay there panting that Barb continued to ride her hand. She then pulled herself off and raised Devon's wet fingers between them. Eyes locked upon Devon's green ones, Barb began to clean Devon's fingers with her tongue. Devon hissed thinking about how that pointed red instrument with the small silver ball in the middle would feel against her.

Devon removed Barb from her lap, shook a leg free of her pants and placed her back against the end of the couch. She threw the freed leg over the back of the sofa and crooked her finger towards Barb, beckoning her into position. Without much effort, Barb fitted herself upon the couch between Devon's open legs. She took Devon quickly and relentlessly.

Devon threw her head back her hips gyrated wildly in all directions, up and down, side to side in the attack by Barb and that silver ball. She was close to exploding once again. Devon closed her eyes and was visited by the raven-haired beauty that had started this whole spiral. She placed a hand on the back of Barb's head and held her in place. Barb eased two fingers inside of Devon and wrapped her arm around one of her legs to hold on. Devon came with an explosive vengeance rising high off the couch creating her cacophony of sounds with in the small apartment. She was sure the neighbors upper and lower heard her clearly reach the heavens. She moved her hips slowly and deeply against Barb's face and hands until she collapsed on the scratchy couch too spent of energy to maintain the suspension.

"Dear God that was heaven," Devon panted. Trying to open eyes that felt sealed from being squeezed so tightly.

"Hmmm. I feel the same way Debra. Let's continue this somewhere more comfortable."

"I have to catch my breath first before I can move," Devon panted.

"Ok." Barb sat on her haunches between Devon's legs and reached out to touch Devon's breasts. Instantly, she found her wrists in a strong grip between small hands.

"Don't touch me?yet."

"Hmmm, that's alright. I can wait. I have some interesting things in the other room for us to explore, when you're?"

The beeping of Devon's cell phone cut off Barb's invitation. "Excuse me, I have to get that." Barb shifted so that she was sitting properly but uncomfortable in her own wetness upon the couch. Devon lethargically returned her legs to the floor and reached for her pants to find the ringing device. She looked at the 911code and showed it to Barb.

"I'm sorry about this. It's my mother, my dad must be ill again. I have to go." I'm whipped.

"Your father is sick? Oh how awful, but I am sorry that you have to go. Can we finish when you're done with your father?" she asked letting the robe fall from her shoulders freezing Devon as she slipped into her jeans.

"Oh that is a definite yes, Barb. We are far from finished here." I thank you. You have gotten farther than most. I just had to feel that tongue ring.

"How long do you thing you will be?"

"Couple of hours maybe," she said fastening her jeans and shifting the seam away from pressing upon the swollen lips.

Barb left the room and returned with a piece of paper with her telephone number and address upon it. "Just call when you get here and I will buzz you in. Okay?" She stepped up to the blonde and planted a deep and promising kiss upon her lips.

"I most certainly will. Couple of hours at most."

"I can't wait."

"Neither can I." She kissed her deeply once again before being let out into the hushed hallway.

Devon jogged down the two flights of stairs and out into the cool night air. She could almost imagine the steam rise from her head from the hot encounter. The smile she had upon her face for Barb quickly faded to an empty frown. She found her car, got in and locked the door. She leaned her head back to gather her wits before she started the car and then pulled her cell phone from her hip. Pressing a series of numbers, the self-page feature was disengaged and she threw it upon the vacant passenger seat. Devon rolled down the window to keep the smell of sex from choking her and pulled away from the curb. It was a sixty-minute drive back to her city and home.




______________________________________________


Chapter 5

From the platform of the checkout area, Victoria cashed out the last customer in line then looked out over the store. She had been waiting to get her Greg alone to ask him about Devon but the opportunity never presented itself thus far into her shift.

Victoria was helping a customer select children's movies when she saw Devon enter the store and go straight to her office. She couldn't help the pounding her heart began to beat at the sight of the small blonde. Victoria followed her from the time she entered the store until the office door closed. Her heart lodged into her throat and she quickly looked around the store for her cousin.

Victoria checked the customer out and watched him leave the store before going to the family entertainment section where Greg was restocking.

"Greg, I need to talk to you."

"Sure Vic, what's up?"

"Tell me about Devon."

"You still pursuing her? I told you she is not interested in anything. All she does, that I know of is work. I don't know anything else."

"And hang out at the Tavern," another voice sounded. Both Victoria and Greg turned to see Hannah, the gothic chick standing on the other side of the aisle.

"The what?" Greg asked.

"The Tavern. It's a bar over in Cornwall."

"What would she be doing there?"

"The few Fridays that I've seen her there. She usually is alone for a while."

"Alone for a while?" Victoria felt the sinking of her heart. She knew what that meant. She had often done it when she worked for the company. Her need would become too great to manage alone and she often drove an hour or two to another city to find comfort for a few hours. She understood, but hoped it was not true. But why turn me down? Is there something wrong with me or the way that I look? Something is not right. Do I really want to find out? Is she worth it?

"You want to go with me Vic?" Gothic chic smiled. Victoria looked at the nose ring and the black fishnet stocking and inwardly cringed.

"Thank you but some other time maybe." She smiled and hoped it was enough.

"Suit yourself." The girl hunched her shoulders and walked backed to the counter to help the costumers.

"Think she is telling the truth?"

"Don't know Vic. What is it about her that has you so hooked? I didn't even know you two were talking."

"We're not exactly. Greg, I don't know what it is. I just know that when I look at her, I get these? these funny things inside."

"Maybe it's just a crush or something. Wait, how do you know she's gay?"

"The way she kissed me."

Both eyebrows shot high upon his forehead. "Okay that would do it. You really like her huh?"

"What I know of her, yeah. I really do."

"Well I don't know much about her Vic, like I told you before. She keeps to herself, never socializes with any of us. Strictly all business?."

"Well, let's see if I can get her to break with tradition."

"What makes you think she is interested in you? I mean, if she is going to that bar all the time, then that should tell you something."

"Yeah, it tells me she is running away from something. I sensed it when we were in her office the other day."

"I hope you are right."

"Me too. Look, cover for me. I'm going to go see her."

Victoria walked across the store headed for Devon's office. She paused outside and then rapped firmly. She heard the cry for her to enter and she timidly opened the door. Shutting it behind her, Victoria waited for Devon to look up from her papers.

"Hi."

"Something I can help you with Victoria?"

"Yes, two things," Victoria fought off Devon's chilly greeting.

"Oh, what are those?"

"Will you have dinner with me tomorrow night?"

"I don't think that would be wise thing to do."

"Why not?" Eyes leveled on the blonde she slowly walked across the room.

"You mentioned two things?"

"Why are you avoiding me?"

"I am not avoiding you."

"I think that you are."

"I think you are too full of yourself."

Victoria turned the office chair causing Devon to face her. "No I am not. I just know what I want and go after it."

"Is that how you get your conquests?" Cold green icicles bored into blue.

"Don't know. Never had any," Victoria lied.

She took the blonde by the shoulders and made her stand on her feet. Devon was surprised at her lack of resistance. Victoria stroked the short mane letting her hand rest upon the smooth cheek and looked deeply into her eyes.

"I cannot explain this?this hold you seem to have over me. I only know that you have been a constant thought on my mind from the first moment we met. I want to spend time with you. I want to find out why Devon Walsh fascinates me so. Please, have dinner with me tomorrow night." She bent to taste the lips she had yearned for the past several days. Her hands dropped and went about the smaller waist pulling her closer as their kiss deepened. Devon felt her heart hammering behind the chest wall and she momentarily let herself imagine how it would truly be to share a night of unabridged passion with Victoria Newsome. She succumbed to the sharp pinprick tingles flowing through her body and knew this was different. How many lovers' arms had she been entangled in the past several weeks or months? Too many to count and none felt half as good and delicious as the pair that is embracing her now.

They had to break for oxygen and even with the heaving intakes of air; neither could completely fill their lungs. The corner of Victoria's lips curled slightly as she recognized the haze of lust within Devon Walsh's emerald ones.

"Until seven tomorrow night then. Just dinner and a movie, I promise." Victoria planted a kiss upon her forehead. "I don't want to rush this. Okay?"

Devon could only nod feeling the draft of coldness overtake her body when Victoria withdrew her embrace. She wanted them to surround her again. Within them, she felt somehow complete. She felt whole. And I am not. It cannot be, Victoria. Why the hell did I react that way? Why did I let her get that close? I don't have any resistance against her. That has never happened before. Damn, now what do I do?


*********

Devon stood in front of her bathroom mirror. The bath sheet dwarfed her small frame. She wiped the mirror with a part of the towel to see her reflection. After brushing her teeth and cleansing her face, she stared at herself in the mirror. She was to have dinner with Victoria. It would be the first official date that she had been on in over four years.

Her short hair was slicked back from the shower and she watched her reflection closely. She closed her eyes and imagined being wrapped within those arms once again. She could picture them going as far as starting to remove their clothing and then her eyes flew open and she witness the sadness reflected within her soul.

You are the first person who has made me feel again Victoria, and I have no idea why. I hardly know you, yet I let you kiss and caress me as you have. Would you truly want me like this?

Devon slowly removed the bath sheet and tied it about her waist. She studied her reflection intensely. Her eyes focused upon the mastectomy scars that remain in the place where her left breast used to be. She ran her hands slowly over the raised welts and remaining tissue as she tried to remember how her chest used to be sculpted with both breasts intact.

Her fingers moved over the area and she studied the scar pattern closely. She had never accepted the fact that she had breast cancer. The support groups and counselors that came to her through the hospital where her surgery was performed all tried their best to get her to see that she still had her life. That was the best news beside the fact that they managed to get all of the cancer.

She still had her life.

Devon had never been one to be vain or fascinated by looks or attributes that she held, not until she received the news that devastated her. In her opinion, her lesbian opinion, how could she allow a woman to love her with only one breast? She needed to love herself first before someone else could. She could not. No lover could be fulfilled with only one breast to command. None, according to Devon.

She could not completely forsake women. She was a lesbian after all. There were no alternatives to the comforting embrace of the female body. So instead, she sought to alter the way she shared her body, to change the way that she found relief - through nameless encounters, that she would command and control. The women would receive her touch but they were limited in the caresses they bestowed upon her.

Only in the privacy of her home, did she remove her shirt and the prosthetic she wore daily. It was a custom match for her right breast, but only she knew. In four years, her right breast had not been suckled nor fondled. Not even by herself. Devon had been practicing breast neglect, if there were such a thing.

Now there was Victoria, who made her feel things she had not allowed within her heart since Marie. They had dated for a month. It was the getting acquainted period as well as the honeymoon new couple phase. Devon allowed her feelings to stir for Marie, but she always felt that something was missing. One glorious wild month she shut Marie out of her life. Her heart had been barren ever since. That is until Victoria.

Victoria, made Devon want to be touched, made her want to be fondled, to surrender all that she was and to seek a different view of her body, her soul and her spirit. Tears that had not been there for those four years reappeared at that moment as she wept for the sensations that she dearly missed, desperately wanted Victoria to give to her but could not bring herself to risk rejection. She sat upon the closed toilet lid and wrapped the bath sheet around her, cradling herself as she cried for the lonely existence she felt forced to endure.

Devon knew that there were thousands of women who survived breast cancer and lead full family and sexual lives. It was what all the counselors at the hospital and support groups had tried to drum into her. Her positive attitude was critical for her continued recovery and well-being. Still, Devon could not be convinced. She was not one of the contented survivors. Her reality told her that breasts were the foundation for Sapphic love. She truly believed this and without hers there would be no complete love. There would be no Victoria.

If was sometime before the tears ceased and her chest calmed from the wrenching sobs. She stood and splashed cold water upon her face to ease the burning eyes and stuffed nose. She returned to her bedroom selected a pair of jeans and button down shirt from the closet. She quickly dressed, blow dried her hair and left her home twenty minutes before Victoria arrived and rapped upon the front door.

Victoria waited a moment before she pounded louder and waited for a response. She checked her shoes and ran her fingers through her dark hair and hoped that she looked all right. I have never been so nervous before for a date. This is ridiculous. What the hell is wrong with me? She waited and knocked again. When no one answered she finally realized that Devon was either home and refusing to answer her door, or that she was not at home.

Either way, she did not like being stood up.

Victoria walked to the curb and climbed into her Cherokee, started the engine and sat looking at the darkened house. She drummed her fingers upon the wheel and thought about what the gothic chick had said, The Tavern in Cornwall. Victoria pulled away from the curb and headed through the city toward the direction of Cornwall.


*********

It was ten o'clock by the time Victoria made her way to The Tavern on the other side of Cornwall. She had taken the wrong turn twice and the relatively hour or so drive was more than two and half for her. Victoria found a parking space two blocks away and walked behind a group of women heading for the bar as well. She stood in the short line and waited to pay her cover fee to enter the popular nightspot.

It took her eyes sometime to adjust to the rotating darkness and flashing strobe lights of the bar. She was reminded instantly why she did not frequent such places. The smoke was past intolerable and the driving jungle beat from the tall speakers were near deafening. During her college years she lived for places like this. There was always a variety to choose from and back then. She sampled the smorgasbord two or three times a week. When her career began to rise, she restricted herself to private clubs and secure dating services.

Victoria scanned each table section and dance floor that she could from her location by the bar. Gothic Girl said that she saw Devon here. Victoria took the chance that she was right. Victoria moved along the bar further into the club and scanned the back tables and booths. In a corner booth she found Devon. She had a bottle of beer before her and appeared to be alone. Victoria watched and ordered a beer for herself.

Why are you here Devon? You have to feel the same as I do yet you push me away for something from here? Why? Victoria felt a hand upon her shoulder and turned to find an attractive brunette next to her. She gave her a small grin and told her she was not interested. Victoria felt the sadness radiating from Devon across the room. She watched as Devon was proposition by the same brunette and a few others. Each one, she turned down. If Gothic Girl was right, then Devon should have had company by now. Good news for me.

Finally, the thumping beat slowed to something that had intelligible lyrics. Victoria left her stool by the bar and walked a straight path to Devon. She came to rest by her side and waited for Devon to look up. When Devon did, her mouth fell ajar and speech was stricken from her.

Victoria placed her beer upon the table and took Devon firmly by the hand. She pulled her from the booth and led her towards the dance floor. Too stunned to protest, Devon followed, half her body rejoicing that the Victoria had found her and possibly saved her from another night of emotionless passion. The other half was terrified that Victoria had found her.

Victoria found them a spot upon the partial crowded dance floor. Couples seem to thrive upon the sultry voice of Anita Baker singing, "Get Here". Victoria found their place and turned to face a terror-stricken Devon. She smiled and tried to convey that she too was frightened and overwhelmed with the feelings between them. Victoria felt Devon's initial resistance to press her body next to hers. So she did the next best thing, Victoria stepped into Devon's arms.

"Devon," Victoria whispered into her ear. "I don't know what has you frightened of me. I wish I knew so that I could change it. You must feel it too. Don't you?"

"Yes."

"Then why are you running from me?" Victoria stepped back to peer into those emerald eyes. "Please tell me."

"I can't?. I am not who?what?. It won't work between us Victoria."

"I don't buy that. There is something that you are not telling me. What is the real reason Devon?"

Devon stepped out of Victoria arms willing her tears not to fall. "There can not be an 'us'. Get that through your head okay. Stop chasing me. Stop hounding me." She turned and marched off the dance floor heading for the door. Stunned, Victoria turned to see several nearby couples looking back at her. She strode off the floor and followed Devon outdoors.

"Devon!" Victoria cried out toward the figure a block away. She ran and caught up to Devon just before she closed the door of red Magnum. "Devon wait," she puffed and stopped the door from closing.

"Let go of my door Victoria. This is bordering on harassment you know."

"Oh stuff it Devon. We both know that you are running from me and I deserve to know why."

"Why can't you accept the fact that this infatuation with me is just that? I am not interested in a relationship with you."

"I would if that was the truth."

"You are very attractive Victoria, but your arrogance is quite the turn off. Now let go of my door so that I can go home."

"Well excuse me for wanting something more than a one night fuck like you give most of those girls in there. Sorry if I ruined your score for the evening Ms. Walsh," Victoria spat and slammed the door rocking the small car.

Devon watched the figure storm away through the windshield. The numbness began to suffocate her within the car and in her chest. Her mind reeled from the painful truth Victoria spoke. Soon, large bright lights beamed through her windshield as the Grand Cherokee sped past her. She glimpsed the profile of Victoria as she passed. Devon leaned her head upon the steering wheel and took several deep breaths. Well excuse me for wanting something more than a one night fuck like you give most of those girls in there, Victoria words became a mantra in her mind.

Devon started her car and made a u-turn from her parking spot along the curve.



______________________________________________



Scarz concluded in Part 2

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