There is some implied sexual attraction between persons of the same sex. Grow up and/or go away if that's a problem.
Mail is always appreciated at Kamouraskan@yahoo.com
This story takes place sometime after the birth of Eve, in God Fearing Child. In other words, the Fifth Season.
So Beautiful. So cold.
So tired.
If she would only let me sleep.
"Gabrielle," she shakes me. That's my name, gotta remember the important stuff.
Sleepy.
"Gabrielle, you have to stay with me."
'Of course I will,' I think, and I open my eyes to smile at her. She's magnificent! Of course I would stay with her. Silly.
"Gabrielle," and I force my eyes open again. I was almost there. "Whattt?" I slur. I was so comfortable.
"Your body is shutting down because of the cold. You have to stay awake. Please! Listen, I need you to stay awake. Promise me."
She sounds so concerned. Of course, I promise. Stay awake. She needs me to stay awake.
She hands me a wrapped bundle and I see there is a beautiful child in it. Such a cute baby. She tucks it carefully into my arms and leans into my face, and with exaggerated enunciation says, "I've got to find some dry wood. Once we get a fire going, we'll be okay. But you have to look after her and stay awake, Gabrielle. Both your lives depend on it."
She gets much too tense sometimes. I look to the child in my arms. That's right, we do have a baby, now. A beautiful baby girl.
It's so dark, but there is no wind at all. Just night's darkness and the billows of snow. The drifts are so lovely. Exquisite curves and ethereal slopes shaped by the God's own craftsman. I watch as our breath swirls. There is a cave in the moonlight and I remember that we are hiding, on the run again. Traveling for days. Because... the baby. Because...? Someone wants to hurt the baby. We have to protect her. I have to protect her. I have to stay awake. Concentrate, Gabrielle.
The crack of branches snapping carries on the cold air so clearly. All the sounds are so sharp in this frozen night air. I cuddle the little one closer. Our child. She has to be kept warm.
I point out the stars to her. They are larger than I ever remember and each has an iridescent halo about it. So beautiful. I want to write down my thoughts. It's been so long since I felt such poetry. It must be because I have my baby with me again.
Again?
I almost fall asleep and I know I mustn't. There are some words, a song? Did I write them?
I croon them softly to the child in my arms.
Arise and tell to me.
What thou hast done with thy wee babe?
I saw and heard crying by thee.
I put her in a tiny boat
And cast her out to sea
That she might sink,
or she might swim
But she'd never come back to me.
Where did that come from? There was someone who had to do that. I could never, ever...but the memory flies away. Because my child is here. My beautiful girl. I kiss her forehead so gently. 'I'll protect you' I tell her.
Suddenly my warrior is back and there is a thrill of fear before she reaches around me and lifts us up. So powerful. I see that there is a fire already started at the mouth of the cave.
"There's no ventilation, so I can only put it at the entrance. We'll have to sleep near the opening for fresh air."
She has to carry us both , but I'm just happy to be in her arms with my child. Knowing that she wants to protect us both. Seeing it is so wonderful. She want to protect my baby because she loves her, too. Of course she does. Why would I think otherwise?
She leads me past the fire, and begins to rub my legs and wrists while I cradle our child. Something my mother told me appears in my mind. "Rub them with snow..."
"No." she says with authority. " That may slow the discomfort, but you need gradual warmth." And now I can feel the pain, My ears begin to burn and then there are fiery tingles throughout my legs. "It hurts..."
"I know Gabrielle, but we have to do it."
I love how she says my name, and she is so warm. I reach up and with one hand begin to unbuckle her armor, while she continues my massage. The air seems cold suddenly, and I become frustrated trying to remove the armor. But finally there is just her shift. She leaves for a moment and brings all of our blankets. I tug at her shift. "Off. " I mumble.
There is a strange fear in her eyes. "Are you sure?"
"Off." I repeat, beginning to shiver. "Warm ..."
She glances about and quickly removes it and mine and pulls me into her arms.
I am only slightly aware of the blankets being drawn over both of us, because the contact of her flesh is so awesome, so perfect. I close my eyes to concentrate of the feel of her skin against mine. I slowly slide my legs around and between hers, relishing every movement. It is Elysia. I hear the softest of moans from her mouth, and she tenses as she hears herself. Haven't we done this before? We must have. Nothing new could be this flawless. I see her breasts and they are exquisite as well.
So heavy. But why? Shouldn't I be the one who is nursing?
But all coherent thought stops as I duck my head into her chest, and breathe her scent, feel her softness. I tighten my thigh muscles possessively. Mine. There is another soft whisper from her. It is so warm here. I cannot keep my eyes open, but I am very happy. Still numb, but not from the cold anymore. Our child is unwrapped and brought into the safe harbour between us. Protected by both her mothers. I am crooning to her, saying her name, and as I fall asleep I know Xena is listening to me.
Why would that make her sad? That wasn't a tear, was it?
Everything is so right. This is all I have ever wanted. My warrior lover. Protecting my most precious Hope.