DISCLAIMERS:

COPYRIGHT: Xena Warrior Princess, Gabrielle, Janice Covington, Melinda Pappas, and The Xena Scrolls are the property of MCA/Universal and are used here without permission. No copyright infringement implied or intended. Billie and Cat are my creations, Copyright by kd bard. The leading ladies resemble our two X:WP heroines. Any character or name resemblance to 'real' people currently living or dead is completely coincidental. Download it, print it out and pass it around if you'd like, but be sure to include the disclaimers.

SUBTEXT: This story is about two women who are committed to a caring and loving relationship. Sex is part of that relationship, but not the focus. It contains some mildly graphic sex scenes, but nothing kinky. If this type of love offends you, if you are under 18 yrs old, or if love is illegal where you live, climb aboard the anti-subtext train and get outta town.

VIOLENCE: BE WARNED... This installment contains references to rape, incest, and molestation, all mentioned in the past tense, which are essential to the story line. If you are currently a victim of molestation, please, remove yourself immediately. Again, the events in the story are written as past tense, and do not actually occur in the story.

TIME LINE/CONTINUITY: This is the twelfth installment in a modern day Uber-Xena sequence, starting with "The 'Commitment'" and followed by "A Family in Blood", "Personal Preferences", "Fighting City Hall", "Visions in Paradise", "What's In A Name?", "Promise Me Paradise", "While I Was Gone ..." , "Unchained Memories", "Happy Campers - NOT!", and "At Loose Ends". Since these stories are continuations of each other, there are events mentioned within that will not make much sense if you haven't read them all in order.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: I strongly believe that love is love, regardless of how it is packaged, so please don't flame me for believing in something so wonderful. All flames will be flushed down the toilet, however, I do encourage constructive criticism. Send all feedback to warriorx@together.net. A very big thanks to those of you who took the time to find my booboo's ... you know who you are! I really appreciate it. A special thanks to Mom for your support - it means a lot to me. Finally, a big thank you to those who graciously host my stories and provide a forum for expression. kd :-)

NOTE TO READERS: This story picks up immediately after "At Loose Ends" finishes. As I said in a special note at the end of that story, this installment constitutes Part II. The story was just becoming too long to post as one ... however, I did post them together, so I ask that you forgive me for violating (once again) my general rule of not posting partial stories.

On Solid Ground

By: kd bard

Started 04/19/99

Finished 05/02/99

CHAPTER X

Billie woke up and came downstairs just as Cat was loading the supper dishes into the dishwasher. Cat could feel her presence as she entered the kitchen, but kept her back to the tall woman as she rinsed and loaded the dishes. Coming up behind her wife, Billie wrapped her arms around Cat's waist and pulled her back into her chest. Cat went willingly, leaning her head back and to the side as she rested it on Billie's left shoulder. Her right hand came up and held Billie's head in place as the taller woman nuzzled her neck.

"Hmmmmm," they said at the same time.

After a moment or two, Cat turned around in Billie's arms, her hands on her wife's shoulders, while Billie pulled her in closer. "How are you feeling?" she asked, looking into eyes of azure blue.

"Headache's gone. Did you call Doc?" Billie asked.

"Yes I did. He also thinks it was a seizure. He'd like to see you tomorrow, to do some tests, adjust your meds, you know, stuff like that. He also said that driving was off limits for a while until he can understand and control what's causing the seizures," Cat said, knowing how well received that piece of news would be.

"Aw Cat! Do you know how tough it is not to be able to drive?" Billie complained.

"I know, love," Cat replied, "but imagine what could happen if you had a seizure while behind the wheel of a car. And even worse, what if one of the kids was with you?" Cat reasoned.

"I know ... I know, but I don't have to like it," she whined, looking away.

Cat reached up to turn Billie's face back toward her. Standing on tip toes, she placed a light kiss on the dark haired woman's lips. "Are you hungry?" she asked.

Billie grinned. "A little," she answered.

"Well then, sit yourself down and I'll fix a dish for you," Cat said.

"Cat, I can get it ....:" Billie began.

"I said, sit! Doctor's orders!" she added.

"I really hate it when you outrank me!" Billie said, grinning ear to ear.

**********

Cat made a pot of coffee while Billie ate, and sat sipping the rich brew while she kept Billie company at the kitchen table.

"So, other than the seizure, how was your day today?" Cat asked.

Billie swallowed the bit of stew she was chewing. "Actually, the morning went great." Suddenly remembering the information Jimmy had found on the Net, Billie became animated. "Oh, oh, oh! Cat! How could I forget! Jimmy found Mel's child!" she said excitedly.

Cat nearly choked on the sip of coffee she had in her mouth. "He did? That's wonderful, Billie! Where is she?" Cat asked, just as excited.

"Well, he hasn't physically found her, but he found the name of the adoption agency that took her from Mel. Cat, the individual records are sealed, but he did find out there were three children given up for adoption in 1944 in Lancaster ... one of which was on June 14th!" Billie explained.

Cat's eyes were as wide as saucers. "So where is this agency located? It seems like a logical next step to visit them to find out as much as we can about the Lancaster adoptions," Cat reasoned.

"I'm afraid that isn't possible, Cat. The agency was closed in 1948 when the owner was arrested for selling the babies on the black market," Billie said.

"Billie, that's awful!" Cat exclaimed. "How will we find her then?" she asked.

"Well, like I said, the records are sealed, and it will take a court order to open them. I'm prepared to take it to that level if I have to, Cat, but I think we should try a direct appeal to the governor of South Carolina first," Billie explained.

"Billie, do you really think he'll listen to us? Heck, we don't even live in South Carolina," Cat said.

"No, but Melinda does .... a rich, influential, southern belle. Now she's someone, he'll listen to!" Billie explained.

"You are a wicked woman, Billie. I like the way you think," Cat responded with a smile as she rose from the table to fetch the cordless phone.

**********

The phone rang three times before it was picked up. "Hello?" came the rich Southern accent from the other end.

"Grams?" Cat asked. "Is that you?"

"Caitlain? Caitlain, honey, how are you?" Mel asked, a smile in her voice.

"I'm fine, Grams. How are you and Grandma Jan?" she asked.

Ignoring Cat's question, Mel launched into a few of her own. "Caitlain, dear, something is wrong ... I can hear it in your voice. Is Billie ill? I had the strangest feeling about her around noon time. Is she all right?" Mel asked.

Cat looked at Billie with an astonished expression on her face. "Did you say around noon, Grams?" Cat asked.

"Yes. I was sitting in the parlor with Janice, talkin' about the archeological seminar comin' up in about a month, when all of the sudden, I felt this odd feelin' in the pit of my stomach. I called and called and called, but no one answered your phone. Finally I just gave up .... well, actually Janice made me stop.. she said if somethin' was really wrong that you'd call me .... and now you have - so tell me, child, what's wrong with my granddaughter?" Mel finally finished.

"Cat, what is it?" Billie asked from across the kitchen table as she looked at the confused look on her wife's face.

"Grams, could you hold on a minute?" Cat asked.

"Sure, darlin', but I want an answer when you come back," Mel warned.

Cat covered the receiver with her hand as she looked at Billie. "Billie, she knows that something was wrong with you today. She said she felt it. Should I tell her?" Cat asked.

Billie shrugged. "I can't see where it would hurt, Cat. It is kind of odd though that she actually felt it." Billie said.

Cat nodded and removed her hand from the receiver. "Grams, you're right. Billie was ill today. Look, we haven't told you this yet, but Billie has a mild form of epilepsy. She had a seizure today ... around noon," Cat explained.

"I knew it.. I just knew it! Janice, I told you I wasn't losin' my mind! Our Billie had a seizure today ... and it happened around noon!" Mel said off line to her wife.

Cat could hear Janice grumbling in the background, bringing a smile to her face.

"She didn't believe me, Cat ... she thought I was losin' it or somethin'" Mel said, talking into the receiver once more. "Sugar, is Billie right there, I'd like to talk to her," Mel asked.

"Actually, I called you, Grams, because Billie has some news for you ... here, let me put her on," Cat said, handing the phone to Billie and taking her empty dish away.

Billie caught her arm as she started to walk toward the sink, and pulled her back, wrapping her arm around Cat's waist and pulling her in for a kiss. "Thank you" she mouthed to her wife as she let her go. Holding the receiver to her ear, she said, "Hello Grams."

"Child, you nearly scared the life out of me today," Mel scolded, causing Billie to grin. "Land sakes, Billie, you should have told us you had epilepsy. How are you feeling now?" Mel asked.

"I'm fine Grams, really. Its not the first time I've had a seizure, and it probably won't be the last. Don't worry about me. Doc will adjust my meds and I'll be fine," she said. "Grams, I have some news for you. We've found the agency that took your daughter from you."

"Oh my!" Mel said as Billie listened to scuffling sounds on the other end of the line.

"Grams? Grams, are you all right?" Billie said into the phone.

"Billie?" came the sound of Janice's voice. "Mel's all right, she just nearly fainted again. Are you all right, girl?" Janice asked.

"Jan, never mind me, is Mel okay?" Billie said.

"She's fine, in fact, she wants the phone back, but before I hand you over to her, answer the question." Janice demanded.

"Jan, I'm fine. I have epilepsy. I've had it for about a year now. My medication pretty much keeps it under control. Cat thinks the stress of this genealogy search may have brought on the seizure, but I'm fine. Really. Please don't worry," Billie explained.

"All right then, you take care of yourself. Mel, hold your britches on, Geesh!," Janice exclaimed before Mel's voice came back on the line.

"Billie, honey, did you say that you found her?" Mel asked in a shaky voice.

"No Grams, we found the agency that took her from you. The adoption records were seized and sealed, but they do show a child from Lancaster registered with them on June 14, 1944. It has to be her, Gram. I just know it is." Billie said. "There is one problem, though," she continued. "Like I said, the records are sealed and it will take either a court order, or a decree from the governor to open them."

"The governor?" Mel asked. "You leave this to me, Billie. I'll deal with Governor Jamie Hubbard. He happens to be an acquaintance of Janice and I. You see, we have given generously to his campaigns in the past, and I'm sure he would do anything to keep his constituency happy," Mel said, a wicked tone entering her voice. "Now, give me all the details," she said.

Billie spent the next half hour telling Mel everything she knew about Sylvia Tanner and the Children's Home Society. Hanging up the phone, she looked at Cat and smiled. "Your grandmothers can be very ruthless when they have to be love. Remind me never to cross them," Billie said.

Cat leaned over the kitchen table and took Billie's chin in her hand, forcing their eyes to make contact. "OUR grandmothers, love ... OUR grandmothers," she said, causing a grin to spread across Billie's face as she nodded her head up and down.

Billie leaned in to place a gentle kiss on Cat's mouth. Pulling back, she knit her brow together and asked, Cat, where are the kids?"

"They're downstairs watching Dr. Dolittle," Cat answered.

"Dr. Dolittle? That's my favorite!" Billie exclaimed, jumping up from the table and heading for the basements stairs. Turning back she looked at her wife and said, "Ah, Cat, can ....." she began.

"Yes, love, I'll make you some popcorn! I'll be down in a few minutes," she said, seeing the smile cross Billie's face before she disappeared down the stairs. "Kid's today!" she exclaimed while pulling the popcorn pan out of the cup board.

**********

Billie called in an unscheduled vacation day the next morning, opting instead to cuddle a little longer in bed with her wife.

"Cat, it's Friday. Why don't you call in a day off as well. We'll have a relaxing three-day weekend," Billie suggested, pulling Cat closer until the smaller woman was nearly laying completely on top of her.

Cat leaned in and ran butterfly kisses along Billie's jaw. "I can't, sweetheart. It's too short notice to find a replacement," she said. "However, I have only one surgery scheduled for 9 am, so I don't need to be in until 8 am, and I should be free to leave by noon." she said.

"Will Doc be at the hospital, or in his office this morning," Billie asked, leaning her head to the side to give Cat better access to her neck.

"Hospital," Cat said, gently nipping at Billie's neck.

"Gods!" Billie exclaimed. "Good, I'll go in with you this morning and have the tests done there. Seeing that I can't drive, it will work out well that way," she said, grasping Cat's red hair and pulling her in closer to her neck.

"Good plan," Cat said, as she shifted her target from Billie's neck to her mouth, passionately devouring the woman below her.

"Cat ... Cat, I need you," Billie said, panting laboriously. By this time, Billie's hands were roaming freely up and down Cat's back, her legs entwined with the smaller woman's, trapping her in place. Billie reached down and cupped Cat's bottom with both hands, squeezing almost painfully and pulling the smaller woman down into her, grinding their abdomen's together.

Cat threw her head back and moaned, "Aarrgghh ... Billie, please," Cat said.

"Please what?" Billie asked.

"Please take me ... take me to the edge, please ... love me," she begged.

Billie flipped them both over so that Cat was on her back. Leaning in, it was her turn to devour the woman below her. Cat squirmed and thrust her abdomen toward Billie rhythmically. Billie knew that Cat was desperate for release, not that she didn't feel the same. Just looking at her wife in the heat of passion was enough to push Billie nearer to the pinnacle of fulfillment.

Rising to her knees, Billie placed her left thigh between Cat's legs and made contact with her core. Cat gasped at the delicious desire that flooded through her. "Raise your left knee for me, love," Billie instructed. Doing so, brought Cat's own knee in contact with Billie's fount of desire. Soon, the two women were pressed against each other, rocking and thrusting, bringing each other to edge of paradise.

"Billie!" Cat screamed. "Billie, harder, please!" she demanded, trusting her own knee harder against the taller woman.

Billie did as she was told, thrusting against Cat with such force, that it literally moved her several inches across the bed. Each trust, brought her own core down heavily against Cat's thigh. Within moments, the room was filled with cries of passion as both women released their climax simultaneously. After a time the spasms slowed, and Billie tucked her arms under Cat pulling them both over so that she was lying on her back with Cat on top. Cat laid her head on Billie's chest, just below her chin, her hair plastered to her forehead with sweat, her arms hanging limply on the bed on either side of Billie. Billie breathed deeply, watching Cat bodily rise and fall with each breath, her hair also damp with sweat.

Billie looked at the clock and saw that it was nearly 6:00 am. Leaning her head down, she kissed the top of Cat's head and said, "Love, we need to get up and shower. We still have to bring the kids to school."

"Give me a few more minutes, Billie. I can't move." Cat said, chuckling.

By 7 am, they were showered and dressed and urging the children to finish dressing so they could eat breakfast at a somewhat leisurely pace. Since Billie couldn't cook worth a damn, she was relegated to lunch duty, making ham sandwiches, and filling lunch bags with pudding cups and apples, while Cat threw together bacon, scrambled eggs and toast. Soon, dressed, fed, and armed with school bags, the kids headed out to the car, the adults right behind them.

Just as she was pulling the kitchen door closed behind them, the phone rang. Billie swore under her breath and motioned to Cat that she'd only be a moment, racing to reach the phone before the caller hung up.

"Hello?" she said into the receiver.

"Good Morning, Billie," Mel's voice clearly said from the other end.

"Grams!" Billie exclaimed, out of breath.

"Billie, you aren't havin' another seizure are you? You sound out of breath," Mel said worriedly.

"Grams ... I ran in from outdoors to catch the phone before you hung up ... No, I'm not having another seizure," Billie answered.

"That's good dear. Look, I'm calling to let you know that Janice and I have a lunch date with Governor Hubbard today. I intend to make it clear to him that his cooperation is key to future campaign contributions. In fact, I'm even thinkin' of donatin' enough money to build a youth center, named after him," she explained. "What to you think?"

"I think you are an evil woman, Grams," Billie said, mirth filling her voice.

"Thank you, dear. I knew you would approve. I know you're probably on your way out, so I'll give y'all a call later to let you know how things turned out, okay?" Mel said.

"Okay, Grams. Good Luck ... and Grams ... I love you, and Jan too. You know that don't you?" Billie asked.

"I do know, love. We love you too, very much. I'll call you later this afternoon. Bye." Mel said, hanging up the phone.

************************************************************************************************

CHAPTER XI

Billie spent the morning undergoing a barrage of blood tests while Cat was in surgery. After sufficient fussing over the bruise on her temple, Doc invited her back to his office when the tests were done. Opening the door, he motioned for her to enter before him.

"Have a seat," he said. "How about a cup of coffee?" he asked.

"Doc, you're a man after my own heart," Billie said. "Please .... I'm just about due for a fix anyway," she added, grinning and accepting a cup of the strong rich brew from the doctor.

"So, Billie, tell me, how are things with you and Caitlain?" he asked.

"Things are wonderful, thanks for asking," Billie said. "We're a little overwhelmed right now with the search for my mother, but we seem to be holding up under the strain," Billie commented.

"Well, young lady," Doc said, leaning across his desk toward her. "Caitlain may be holding up under the strain, but you're not."

Billie narrowed her eyes. "What do you mean?" she asked.

"Billie, one of the things that can bring on an epileptic seizure, is extreme stress. Considering that your condition has been well under control with your current level of medication for about a year, the probability that this attack was stress related is pretty high. You need to either end this search of yours, or you need to deal with the stress better. Tell me, have you been to the gym lately?" he asked.

Billie looked guiltily at the cup in her hands. "Well ... no, not as much as I should, I guess. This search has been pretty time consuming," she admitted. "I run most mornings, but then, it's the end of the day when I'm stressed out. Maybe I should change the time of my workout," Billie suggested.

"No, I wouldn't change it," Doc said. "I mean, if you're running every morning now and still having seizures, then changing the time that you're running may not be enough. I would suggest adding a work out at the end of the day, even something as simple as power walking or stationary cycling," he suggested. "If stress is indeed the cause of the seizure, then you either need to remove the source of the stress, which by the way is my first recommendation, or, you need to find a way to work off the stress before it affects you physically."

Billie nodded her head and looked at Doc. "I can't quit the search now, Doc. You know we're very close to finding Melinda's daughter. We have the name of the agency that took her, and in about ..... one hour," Billie said, looking at her watch, "Melinda and Janice will attempt to gain access to the sealed records on the adoption through the governor of South Carolina."

Doc smiled and sat back in his chair. "Well, if anyone can charm the pants off the governor of South Carolina, it's Melinda," he said. "I hope she reins Janice in before the meeting, though. When Mad Dog is on a roll, there's no stopping her. I'd hate to see a tirade on Janice's part ruin Mel's chances with the governor."

"Mad Dog?" Billie questioned, her eyebrows arching high on her forehead.

Doc rose to his feet and retrieved the coffee pot from the warmer. Walking over to Billie, he refilled her cup, and then his own before returning the pot to the hot plate. Settling back down in his chair, he leaned back and smiled. For the next hour, Billie was thoroughly entertained by the archeological antics of Mad Dog Covington.

**********

Cat found Billie in her father's office after her post-surgery debriefing. Pushing the door open, she walked in to find Billie holding her stomach, laughing heartily. Walking over to her wife, she leaned down and kissed her tenderly, asking, "What's up?"

Billie was still chuckling. "Hi, love. Your father was filling me in on the legend of Mad Dog Covington," she said.

Cat smiled. "That grandmother of mine is certainly a character," she said.

"That she is, Kitten, that she is. How did surgery go?" Doc asked.

"Very well," Cat said. "No complications. The patient stayed relatively stable throughout the operation," Cat replied.

"Good. Well, if you ladies will excuse me, I have a lunch date with your Mother, and knowing her, she'll kill me if I'm late. I'll see you and the kids tomorrow then?" he asked, looking at Billie.

"Tomorrow, it is, Doc," Billie said, looking at the questioning expression on Cat's face.

Doc leaned in to kiss both ladies on the cheek before excusing himself and leaving the office. After he left, Cat looked at Billie. "Tomorrow?" she asked.

"Your dad invited us over for a cookout. What could I say? I didn't think we had other plans ... do we?" Billie asked sheepishly.

Cat smiled. "No we don't ... it just surprised me, that's all. So, want to get some lunch?" she asked.

"Sure," Billie said, looking nervously at her watch.

"What is it, Billie?" Cat asked, seeing the gesture.

"Nothing, really. It's just that Mel and Janice are meeting with the governor just about now. I hope he cooperates," Billie replied.

Cat grinned. Locking arms with Billie and leading her toward the door, she said, "Between Mel and Mad Dog, how can he resist?"

"How indeed?" Billie replied as they left for lunch.

**********

After a leisurely lunch, Cat and Billie returned home, intent on spending a few intimate hours together before the children came home from school. Walking into the kitchen, Cat threw her keys on the table and kicked her shoes off into the corner by the closet. Purely by habit, she walked over to the refrigerator and reached for the handle. Billie was there, her hand against the door, holding it closed before Cat could open it. Cat turned around to look at Billie, and found herself trapped against the refrigerator door, in the circle of Billie's arms. Looking into Billie's eyes, she saw a smoldering fire burning deep within their blue depths. Billie reached forward with her right hand and placed it around Cat's neck, pushing her head against the refrigerator door and tilting it up at the same time, before lowering her mouth to Cat's.

Several passionate moments later, both women were breathless from the intensity of the exchange. Stepping back, Billie bent over and placed an arm under Cat's legs, lifting her off the floor and bodily carrying her into the living room. Not wanting to waste the time and energy climbing the stairs, Billie headed for the overstuffed couch, laying Cat down, and then herself on top of the smaller woman. More passionate kissing followed. Soon, Billie worked her way from Cat's mouth to her throat, and across her collar bones. Cat's head was thrown back into the cushion, her breath coming in frantic pants, as Billie reached up to unbutton her shirt.

Just as Billie flung open Cat's shirt, the phone rang. Billie raised her head and looked at Cat, wavering between answering and ignoring the rings. Moments passed, their eyes remaining locked as two, then three, then four rings pealed out. Finally, the answering machine picked up the phone. Billie smiled and lowered her mouth once more to Cat's lips.

Suddenly, the sound of Mel's frantic voice came across the speaker on the answering machine, causing an instant pause once more in their lovemaking as both women listened to the message. "Sweethearts, we did it! We did it! The governor graciously allowed us access to my daughter's adoption records. We have a name, Billie! We have a name! Give me a call when you get home, okay? We'll talk to ...." Mel's voice rang out.

Billie was on her feet in seconds, grabbing the phone before Mel hung up. "Grams! It's Billie. No ... everything's fine ... Cat and I were just, ah ... a little tied up. No, it's all right," Billie said into the phone as Cat sat back up, smiling at her wife's discomfort while she rebuttoned her shirt.

"You said you had a name?" Billie asked, picking up the pen by the phone, ready to take down the information. "Okay ... okay ... 'Howard and Julia Mcguire' ... I think I've got it. All right. Grams, I'm going to call Jimmy as soon as I hang up to see if there's anything he can do for us today, other wise it will be Monday at the earliest before we know anything. Yes, I know, it will be a long weekend ... but Grams, it's been a long fifty-five years. I promise I'll find out as fast as I can. I'll call you as soon as we know something, okay? All right. We love you, and Janice too. I'll talk to you later. Bye."

Billie hung up the phone and looked at Cat. Cat was curled up on the couch with her arm thrown over the back, looking at Billie with a look of anticipation on her face. "Cat ... we have the name of her adoptive parents, Howard and Julia Mcguire," was all she could say before the tears came. Cat rose from the couch and approached Billie, wrapping her arms around the taller woman.

"Shhh, it's okay, love. Calm down ... that's it, relax," she said as Billie's shaking slowly stopped. "Now, call Jimmy and give him the information, then, I want you to relax and take a nap, okay? I'll stay with you until the kids get home," Cat suggested.

Moments later, after placing the phone call to Jimmy, Cat and Billie were in bed, wrapped in each other's arms, Billie's head on Cat's shoulder, while Cat repeatedly rubbed the arm Billie had thrown over her chest. Billie was soon sleeping, consumed by emotional exhaustion. Cat looked at the ceiling, praying to any god that would listen that this woman was indeed Billie's mother, dreading the disappointment that would surely follow if it turned out not to be the case.

**********

The phone rang as the Charland family sat down to eat supper.

"I'll get it," Billie said, jumping to her feet. She had been edgy all afternoon, anxiously awaiting a phone call from Jimmy. "Hello?" she said into the receiver.

"Hi Missy, this is Jimmy. I've got the information you were looking for," he said.

Billie's knees suddenly became weak as she reached her hand out against the wall for support. Cat was on her feet immediately, going to Billie's side, and placing an arm around her waist. Billie's arm went around Cat's shoulder for balance. Cat looked back over her shoulder to the table, where the three children were watching them with concern etched on their faces.

"Is Mom all right?" Seth asked nervously.

"She's fine honey," Cat said, "Seth, bring a chair over here for Mom, will you? Billie, let me take this," she said, taking the receiver out of her wife's hand as Seth pushed the chair in behind Billie's knees. "Thanks, Sweetie," she said to her son as he stepped back a pace, unsure of how serious the situation was. Into the phone, Cat said, "Jimmy, this is Cat. Could you hold on for a minute please? Thanks."

Cat looked at Billie, who was sitting in the chair staring blankly ahead, then looked back at Seth. "Sweetheart, Mom's okay, I promise. She's just a little overwhelmed right now with the search she on to find her mother. Do you understand? Please don't worry, okay?" Cat finished.

Seth nodded his head and went back to sit at the table, just staring at his supper, still a little unsure of his mother's condition. Skylar was whimpering lightly while Tara stood by her side, rubbing her back, eyes wide with worry at her mother's strange behavior.

Cat looked at the children and then down at Billie, who was still sitting there, staring straight ahead. Raising the receiver to her ear once more, she spoke to Jimmy. "I'm sorry to keep you waiting, Jimmy, but Billie's a bit overwhelmed right now. Why don't you give me the information and I'll see that she gets it, okay?" Minutes later, she hung up the phone and knelt down on the floor in front of Billie. Reaching up, she placed her hand on the side of Billie's face and softly called out her name. Billie blinked her eyes and focused on Cat, confusion clearly written across her features.

Looking around at the worried expressions on the children's faces, and then coming back to rest on Cat, Billie said, "Cat, what happened?"

"You had a petit mal seizure, Billie," Cat said angrily.

"I did?" Billie responded, still looking confused.

"Yes, you did. Damn it Billie! This mission you're on is getting to be way too much for you," Cat said in a raised voice, before remembering their audience of three just a few feet away. "Damn," Cat said under her breath. "Look, Billie, we can talk about this later, okay? Right now, we need to finish supper," Cat said, helping Billie to her feet and leading her to the table, still somewhat in a stupor. She then went to comfort the girls who were still tense with worry.

Billie sat down and looked around the table at three long faces. "Hey, what are the sour pusses for?" she said, forcing a smile to lighten the mood. One by one, the worried expressions started to lift, and soon the supper table turned into it's usual sounding board for the day's events, the only notable difference being the looks of confusion, concern and anger that flew back and forth across the table between the two adults.

**********

Billie sat up in bed, her back resting against the headboard, watching an angry Cat pace back and forth across the room, not saying a word.

Cat was struggling with herself over whether or not to tell Billie about Jimmy's phone call ... a call she obviously did not remember taking place. Finally, she decided to wait until Sunday to tell her. This would give her at least one day to relax and enjoy the cookout her father had planned. Cat stopped her pacing and stood at the foot of the bed, looking at Billie.

Billie had been looking down at her hands in her lap while Cat paced. She knew she was in trouble. Doc had warned her to take it easy, and according to Cat, she got herself all worked up when the phone rang, and fell into another seizure. She had never felt so helpless in her life. She really needed to learn how to deal with extra stress, or she'd be walking on egg shells for the rest of her life. Her whole livelihood was at stake here. Being a lawyer was by definition, a stressful job. Finally, making a decision, she raised her head and looked at Cat.

"Cat, I want to start seeing Dr. O'Brien again," she said.

Cat's brow knit together in confusion. "Why?" she asked.

"Cat, honey, I know you think this search is what's causing the seizures, but in reality, its the stress caused by the search ... you see? It's the stress doing it, not the search itself. If I can't learn to deal with stress better, this is going to happen every time I get upset about something. I really think I need to see Dr. O'Brien again," Billie explained.

Cat just stood there, her arms crossed in front of her, nodding her head. "All right, Billie. Give her a call Monday morning and set it up. I'll go with you, if you'd like," she said.

Billie just nodded her acceptance and looked back down at her hands. Cat stood there, trying very hard to stay angry at her, but failing miserably. The heart-stricken look on Billie's face at the moment was tearing her to shreds. Crawling onto the bed next to her love, she reached over and pulled Billie's head down into her lap, stroking back her hair and humming an old lullaby Ida used to sing to her as a child. Soon, Billie was sleeping peacefully. Being careful not to wake up her sleeping beauty, Cat slid down onto the bed beside Billie and reached over to turn out the light. Moments later, both women were walking in the realm of Morpheus.

************************************************************************************************

CHAPTER XII

The cookout was a huge success. Cat kept a close eye on Billie and noted that she was making a conscious effort to relax and enjoy herself, being as playful as ever with the children, and even sneaking up on Doc to spray him with the garden hose. It felt so good to see her at ease. Now more than ever, Cat was glad that she had withheld the information about Jimmy's phone call.

Later that evening, Billie called Jen and Fred and made arrangements for the four of them to go out to dinner. Hiring a sitter for the five children, they set out to enjoy an evening of dining and dancing. They had decided to dress casually, with dress slacks and blouses, and no tie for Fred. The two couples completely enjoyed themselves, despite the odd looks Cat and Billie received when they hit the dance floor. When they returned home, all five children were sleeping in wild array on sleeping bags all over the floor of Cat and Billie's family room. Instead of waking them, Cat insisted that Stevie and Karissa be allowed to spend the night, giving Jen and Fred a much deserved night alone. Billie shooed their friend's out the door, with a pat on Jen's behind and a wink to Fred, telling them not to show up to collect their children before noon the next day.

All in all, it had been a nice day.

It was a pity the same could not be said of the following day.

Billie rose early as usual, donning her running gear and heading out for her five mile run through the park. When she returned nearly an hour later, she stripped off her clothes and jumped into the shower, washing away the sweat from her run. She briskly toweled herself dry and slipped on a sports bra, button up sleeveless shirt, which she tied in the front with the shirt tails, and a pair of cut-off jean shorts, her mid section from navel to diaphragm exposed.

Padding through the house in her bare feet, she reached the kitchen and put on a pot of coffee to brew, then walked around picking up the few odds and end items that the kids had left hanging around from the night before, an empty soda can, a paper towel, a piece of paper with some scribbling on it. Billie carried these items to the waste basket and threw them in. Watching them fall into the bin, she suddenly noticed the name 'Jimmy' on the paper she had just thrown away. Her heart rose to her throat as the leaned down and retrieved the paper from the bin. Carrying it over to the kitchen table, she sat down and started to read.

'Jimmy called. He found the address for the adoptive parents:

Laurel Mcguire, born 6/14/44, Lancaster, South Carolina

Adopted by Howard and Julia Mcguire

Current Address: 163 Pine Street, Hazelton, Pennsylvania

Adoption Agency: Children's Home Society

Adoption Agent: Sylvia Tanner'

Billie looked up from the note to see Cat standing in the kitchen doorway. Cat's eye were wide with anticipation, guilt clearly written on her face.

Narrowing her eyes, and fighting back tears of hurt and anger, Billie asked, as calmly as possible, "When did this call come in, Cat?"

"Friday night during dinner," Cat replied, raising her chin defensively.

Billie rose to her feet and turned her back on Cat. She walked over to the kitchen door and looked out the window. "Friday night during dinner," she repeated. Turning around sharply, she looked intensely at Cat. Holding the note out in front of her, she said, "And here it is, Sunday morning. When did you plan on telling me about this, Cat?" she demanded angrily.

"Sometime today," Cat replied truthfully.

Billie stood there, totally outraged. Walking toward the smaller woman, and stopping just inches from her, she leaned over so that their faces were a mere hairs breath away. "What gave you the right to withhold this from me, Cat? I've lost an entire day of searching because of you," she said in low angry tones.

Cat was pissed. "What gives me the right? What gives me the right!" she yelled, walking into Billie and forcing the taller woman back a couple of steps. "I'll tell you what gives me the right! Watching you work yourself into a frenzy and scaring the shit out of the children by falling into a seizure because of it! That's what gives me the right, Billie!"

Billie's eyes widened at the revelation. Looking down at the note in her hand, she asked, "This is what prompted the seizure?"

Cat nodded her head yes, watching as the taller woman sank back down into the kitchen chair she had vacated earlier. Propping her right elbow up on the table, Billie dropped her forehead into the right hand and rubbed at her bruised temple. "Damn!" she exclaimed.

"Billie, this is becoming too much for you. You either need to give up this quest, or let someone help you with it," Cat said angrily.

Billie's jaw clenched and unclenched repeatedly. "I can't give up, Cat," she said firmly.

"Well, I can't stand by and watch you make yourself sick over it. The kids were terrified last night Billie. I'm sorry I withheld the information from you, but you were in no condition to deal with it at the time. Now, you can be angry with me if you want, but given the chance, I'd do it again!" Cat exclaimed.

Billie sat silently for long moments, contemplating the table top while Cat stood by nervously awaiting her reply. Finally, she sighed deeply and said, "I'm sorry I yelled at you, Cat. You were only doing what you thought was best for me."

Cat walked up behind Billie and wrapped her arms around the taller woman's neck, hugging her closely. "I forgive you, love. Now, will you please let me help you?" she asked.

"Help me how, Cat?" Billie asked, still rubbing her temple.

"You've been trying to do this all alone, Billie. The last time I looked, we were a team. Let me help. Let me make the phone calls. Let me ease some of the stress ... please." she said.

Billie nodded her head. "Have I told you lately how much I love you, Cat?" she asked.

"Every time you look at me, love ... Every time you look at me," Cat said.

**********

"Hello?" came the soft female voice from the other end of the line.

"Hello, my name is Cat Charland. I am looking for Howard or Julia Mcguire. Am I speaking with Mrs. Mcguire?" Cat asked.

"Yes, but before you start, I'm not interested in buying anything ....." the fragile sounding woman began.

"No! No, I'm not a saleswoman, Mrs. Mcguire. Please don't hang up." Cat pleaded. "I'm calling ... well, I'm actually looking for a Laurel Mcguire. Do you know where I can ...." CLICK, came the sound from the other end, cutting Cat off in mid-stream.

Cat looked at the receiver like it was an alien creature that suddenly appeared in her hand. "Huh," she said, dialing the number again. For a second time, the frail voice answered the phone.

"Mrs. Mcguire, please don't hang up. I have reason to believe that Laurel is the mother of someone very close to me ... please, just give me a few minutes of your time." Cat begged.

"Please hurry," the voice said. "He'll be back soon, and I'll have to hang up again."

It became immediately obvious to Cat that the woman on the other end of the line was afraid for her own safety, not disturbed by the phone call. "Mrs. Mcguire. I need to know where Laurel is. Do you know?" Cat asked.

"You say she is someone's mother?" the woman asked.

"Yes ... someone very dear to my heart," Cat exclaimed, looking up into smiling blue eyes. "She is ill right now and unable to make this call herself." So I'm stretching the truth here just a little bit! Cat thought, as she shrugged her shoulders to the dark haired woman beside her. "Will you help me?" Cat asked.

"She hasn't lived here for about 30 years," the woman said. "Threw her out of the house, he did. Told her never to come back, he said. Got herself in trouble! Got into drugs. Bad seed, he said," the older woman rambled into the phone.

"Please, Mrs. Mcguire, tell me, where is she?" Cat urged, getting the distinct feeling that she was losing this woman..

"Don't tell him I know. Don't tell him I've been staying in touch with her. Hell to pay if he finds out," the woman said.

"Julia, I won't tell. I promise," Cat replied. "Where is she, Julia?" Cat pushed again, looking over at Billie, who sat there clenching her fists at the obvious abuse that was going on in that household.

"Bay City .... 15 Birch Court, Bay City, Michigan. Got married, she did ... many years ago." the disoriented woman said.

"I need a married name, Julia ... Please, give me her married name." Cat said, feeling a sense of urgency.

Suddenly, Cat heard the gruff sound of a man's voice in the background. "Who are you talking to, bitch?" said the voice.

In a moment of lucidity, Julia said into the phone, "I'm sorry Mrs. Stafford, but I'm not interested in buying any magazines. Please don't call here again." CLICK.

Cat looked over at Billie as she held the dead receiver to her chest.

"Did you get the name, Cat? she asked, hope filling her eyes.

Cat hung up the phone and reached for the pad of paper and pencil in front of her. Holding it so that Billie couldn't see what she was writing, she wrote in bold print: 'Laurel Stafford, 15 Birch Court, Bay City, Michigan'. Handing the pad to Billie, she smiled and said, "Which do you prefer, an aisle or a window seat?"

Billie grabbed Cat's face in her hands and kissed her hard and long, smacking loudly when she released her. Smiling widely, she said, "Cat, my love ... kick me now for not letting you help earlier. I've been a fool! Thank you, sweetheart."

Cat just smiled. "I'll put it on your bill," she said.

Billie raised her eyebrows. "Bill?" she asked.

"Oh yes ... and I'm very expensive," Cat said seriously.

Billie reached into her pockets and pulled the linings out, indicating her penniless status. She looked at Cat sheepishly. "Can I take it out in trade?" she said, a wicked gleam in her eyes.

"Well, it just so happens, Ms. Charland, that I don't accept checks, money orders or credit cards, so that pretty much limits your options, wouldn't you say?" Cat said as she circled around a seated Billie, trailing her fingertips across broad shoulders and finally seating herself in the chair at Billie's left.

Billie turned her face toward Cat. "Trade?" she asked.

"Do you mind if I inspect the merchandise first?" Cat asked.

"No, go ahead," Billie replied as Cat once again stood and circled around her, poking and prodding, squeezing and pinching. Finally Cat looked into her mouth.

"What am I, livestock?" Billie asked with mock indignance.

"Hey, if I'm going to hire you for stud service, I want to know what I'm getting," Cat explained.

"Stud service?" Billie questioned sarcastically.

Cat took one more look around the tall woman before saying, "You'll do. Trade it is. Upstairs -- two minutes -- be there!" she said, getting up and leaving the kitchen.

Billie sat at the table and looked once more at the name and address on the pad of paper. "I'll see you soon, Mom," she said before grinning broadly and rising to her feet to follow her wife upstairs.

**********

Hours later, Billie was flat on her back, out cold and worn out from paying off her debt to Cat. Cat smiled as she brushed the dark bangs off her wife's forehead, then leaned in to kiss the spot vacated by the hair. "Poor baby," Cat thought. "She's still weak from the seizures." Leaning in again, she placed one final kiss on her forehead then whispered in the sleeping woman's ear, "If you push yourself too hard again, you won't have to worry about seizures, because I'll kill you myself. Sleep well, my love," she said, rising from the bed and pulling a T-shirt over her head.

It was just about time for the kids to come back from the movies with Jen and Fred (payback from the night before), and Cat had a phone call to make before pulling something together for supper. Padding down the stairs to the kitchen, she reached for the phone and dialed the number for Pappington Acres, Charleston, South Carolina.

"Yeah?" came the greeting from the other end of the line.

"Grams!" Cat said cheerfully. "You know Grandma Mel doesn't like you to answer the phone that way," she scolded.

"Yeah, well, Melinda needs to loosen up a bit," Janice said. "What's up?"

"Some good news, Grams. Could you ask Grandma Mel to pick up the extension so I can tell both of you?" she asked.

"I would, Cat, but Mel's not here. She's gone into town with Maggie to visit the craft fair. Damned craft fairs. Last year, Mel dragged me to four of them! Little does she know, I paid Maggie to go with her this time," Janice said, chuckling under her voice, very proud of herself. "So, you can either call back later, or give me the message and I'll ask her to call you," Janice suggested.

"No, I'll tell you," Cat said. "Grams, we contacted Laurel's adoptive parents this afternoon. We now have a married name and address for her. We need to decide what to do next," Cat explained.

Cat was greeted by silence at the other end of the line.

"Grams?" Cat said.

"I'm here. I'm just worried about Mel, Cat. What if this reunion thing doesn't go well? What if Laurel is angry about being given up? I swear, if she hurts Mel, I'll ....." Janice sputtered.

"Grams, I know. I've been thinking the same thing about Billie, about how she will feel facing the woman who gave her away, the woman who essentially sold her into adoption," Cat said.

"Well, it doesn't really matter how you and I feel about this you know. Mel and Billie have to do what's right for them, and it's our job to stand by them, even if we don't agree with what they're doing." Janice said.

Cat sighed into the phone. "You know something, Grams," Cat said, "sometimes it's no fun being the sidekick".

************************************************************************************************

CHAPTER XIII

The flight into Flint Michigan was relatively uneventful. After securing a rental car, Billie and Cat drove the one hour distance between Flint and Bay City in moderate silence. Cat kept glancing over at Billie, concerned about the woman's solitude.

"Sweetheart, are you all right?" Cat asked from her position behind the steering wheel.

Billie nodded her head without looking at Cat. On one hand, she would have preferred to take this trip alone, since she couldn't guarantee what her reaction would be to the woman who could possibly be her mother. On the other hand, having Cat with her was comforting. She really depended on her for strength and support, more than even Cat realized.

"Do you want to find her first, or check into the hotel?" Cat asked.

Billie looked at her watch. "Its still early Cat. Let's settle in and then start our search, okay?" she asked, reaching up to rub her temple.

"Headache, love?" Cat asked, noticing the gesture.

"Yeah, a small one," Billie replied. "Maybe I can catch an hour or two of sleep before we look for Laurel," she suggested.

Cat nodded as she pulled into the parking lot of the hotel. "That's a vey good idea, Billie. I could use a nap myself," she said.

While Billie checked them in, Cat wandered over to the information counter and asked for directions to Birch Court. By the time Billie was done, she had directions in hand, and followed her wife to the elevator. Stepping out of the elevator, Billie looked at the electronic key and said, "708. Room 708, this way, Cat," she said, turning right and finding the room halfway down the hallway.

Stepping into the room, they noticed they had a breath taking view of Lake Huron. Billie dropped the suitcase on the floor by the door and walked over to stand in front of the window. Cat came up beside her, wrapped her arm around the taller woman's waist, and leaned her head against Billie's upper arm. Moving her arm from Billie's waist to her back, Cat began to rub her hand up and down the broad expanse.

"Talk to me Billie. I can feel your pain. Please let me in," Cat pleaded.

Billie turned to face Cat, taking the smaller woman into her arms. "I'm afraid, Cat. I'm scared out of my mind of meeting this woman. Over the past few days, I have harbored such thoughts. Hurtful, vengeful thoughts." Billie tried to explain.

Cat pulled out of Billie's embrace and led her to the bed, pushing her down into a seated position. Bending down, she unlaced and removed Billie's shoes, then pushed her shoulders so that she was laying on her back. Climbing onto the bed beside her, Cat reached for the comforter at the foot of the bed and pulled it over both of them. Opening her arms to her wife, Cat said, "Now come here, love. Let me hold you while you talk."

Billie gratefully rolled into Cat's arms and rested her dark head on the smaller woman's shoulder. Cat waited patiently for Billie to speak, while she stroked the long dark hair.

"Cat, how can it be possible to hate someone you've never met?" Billie asked.

Cat forced herself to remain calm, even though Billie's question upset her terribly. "Do you really hate her, Billie?" Cat asked.

"I don't know what I feel right now. Sometimes I hate her, sometimes I don't. I try really hard to understand why she would give me up, why ... how, could anyone give away a child. Cat, how could she do that to me?" Billie asked, crying into Cat's shoulder.

"I don't know, love. She may have had good reason to, but we will find out, and I will be there with you, holding your hand if you need me to," Cat said softly.

"I do need you to, Cat," Billie said before she drifted off to sleep.

**********

"All right, Billie, where to we turn next?" Cat asked, waiting for Billie to read the directions from her shotgun position in the passenger seat.

"Go through the next set of lights, then take your second left, then first right," Billie instructed.

"Second left, first right. Okay, there's the second left," Cat said as she made the left hand turn, followed almost immediately by a right hand turn. "Birch Court ... here we are, Billie. We're looking for 15 Birch Court, right?" Cat asked as she watched Billie's jaw clench and unclench convulsively.

Moments later, Cat pulled the car to a stop in front of 15 Birch Court. Turning off the engine, she looked over at Billie. "Do you want me to do this, Billie?" she asked.

Billie looked at her. "No, Cat. I want us to do this. Please come with me," she said.

Cat reached over and opened the driver's door, climbing out onto the sidewalk by the car. Looking back at Billie she extended her hand to her wife in a show of support. "Are you coming?" she asked gently.

Billie opened her own door and climbed out. Walking around the car, she grasped Cat's hand, and together, they walked to the house. They stood side by side in front of the screen door while Cat reached out and pressed the doorbell.

An attractive woman answered the door. Judging by her appearance, Cat guessed that this woman would be in her late forty's or early fifties. Billie was grasping Cat's hand so tight, that Cat was sure she'd need to splint and maybe cast it later.

The woman's slender figure was nearly Billie's height. Long dark hair, aged by gray, fell in gentle waves around her shoulders. Startling blue eyes stared back at her. "Yes? How may I help you?" she said. Cat nearly melted on the spot as Billie's sultry voice came from this woman's mouth. Billie continued to stand there, silent rage and emotion coursing through her and into Cat's hand, which was rapidly turning blue from lack of blood flow.

Cat found her voice. "Ah, are you Mrs. Stafford, Mrs. Laurel Stafford," Cat asked in a shaky voice, already knowing the answer based on the woman's appearance alone.

"Yes," the woman said. "Do I know you?" she asked Cat.

"No you don't, Mrs. Stafford, but I believe you do know this woman," Cat said, motioning to Billie.

The woman pushed the screen door open to get a better look at Billie. Billie made and held eye contact with her immediately. Laurel's eyes took on a haunted quality, like she recognized Billie, but couldn't quite place her. Unable to break eye contact, she asked Billie, "Where do I know you from?"

"The womb," was all Billie said.

"Suzanne!" was the only word out of Laurel's mouth before she crumbled to the ground before them.

**********

"Mom?" a voice said from inside the house.

Everything was happening in slow motion for Billie. Laurel had looked at her and said, "Suzanne", the name on the tiny bracelet found inside the safe deposit box belonging to Billie's adoptive parents. The next thing she knew, Laurel had fainted away at their feet. "This woman was most definitely her mother, and Mel's daughter," Billie thought. Billie just stood there, looking the prone at body of the woman in front of her.

"Billie! Billie, snap out of it!" Cat yelled at her as she bent over the woman on the ground.

"Mom?" the voice said again, louder and closer. From inside the house, emerged a young man. Tall, lean, muscular build, broad shoulders, curly blonde hair, dimples, and the same blue eyes that resided with Billie, Laurel and Mel. "Mom!" he said urgently when he saw his mother unconscious at the feet of two strangers.

The young man barged in between Cat and Billie and pushed them away. "What have you done to her?" he asked, bending over to tend to the woman.

"She fainted," Cat said. "She's not injured."

Lifting Laurel into his arms, he turned to look at Cat. "What are you, a doctor?" he asked sarcastically.

"As a matter of fact, I am," she said. "Bring her into the house and I'll have a look at her," Cat offered.

"No. I don't know who you are, or what business you have here, but I suggest you leave right now, before I call the police," he threatened.

Billie spoke for the first time. "Let Cat look at her. She really is a doctor."

The young man turned to Billie with daggers in his eyes. "And who the hell are you?" he asked.

"Your sister," replied Billie, drawing a startled expression out of the boy. "Now bring her into the house so Cat can look at her, or I'll take her from you and do it myself. You got it!" Billie said sharply, nose to nose with her brother.

The young man looked unsure of what to do, until common sense took over and led him to bring Laurel inside. Billie and Cat followed him as he laid her on the couch in the living room, then stood and took a step back, standing next to Billie, eyeing her suspiciously.

Cat immediately fell into doctor-mode. Checking all of Laurel's vital signs, and finding them stable as expected, she asked the young man for a cold cloth to place on the woman's forehead. While he was out of the room, Cat looked at Billie and asked, "Are you all right?"

Billie's jaw muscles were working over time, clenching and unclenching as Billie stood there with her arms crossed in front of her, a stern look on her face. She looked Cat directly in the eyes, but did not answer.

"Billie?" Cat said again before the young man returned, handing her the cloth. "Thank you," she said as she accepted the cloth and placed it on Laurel's forehead. Looking back at the boy, she asked, "What is your name?"

"Dylan Stafford," he replied, casting another suspicious look at Billie.

Cat extended her hand to the young man. "My name is Cat, and this, as you now know, is your sister, Billie," Cat said.

Dylan shook Cat's hand, but kept his distance from Billie. "I don't have a sister," he said defensively.

"Well you do now," Billie said, staring him down, daring him to refute what she had just said, "and as soon as she wakes up," Billie motioned to Laurel, "she can confirm it for you."

Cat did not like the way Billie was behaving. "Billie, can I speak ..." Cat was about to ask Billie if she could speak to her in private, when Laurel began to stir.

Dylan went immediately to Laurel's side, grasping her hand and feeling her forehead. "Mom, are you all right?" he asked worriedly.

"Dylan?" Laurel asked. Looking around, she noticed Cat kneeling on the floor beside her, and Billie, standing a few feet away with a cross expression on her face. Finally, her eyes came back to Dylan's face.

"Mom, she claims that she's my sister," Dylan said, motioning to Billie over his shoulder.

Laurel sat up and then rose to her feet. Closing the few steps between herself and Billie, she stopped directly in front of the younger woman and looked her in the eyes. "Suzanne?" she said again, reaching up to touch Billie's face.

Billie pushed her hand away, causing Cat to cringe. "My name is Billie. Billie Waterman Charland. Does the name sound familiar, Mother?" Billie said, lacing that last word with heavy sarcasm.

"Waterman? Yes. They adopted you," recalled Laurel.

"No Mother, they bought me, for ten thousand dollars, remember? Where did that money go, Mother, up your nose?" Billie demanded angrily.

"Billie!" Cat said, trying to get her wife to calm down. Billie ignored her.

"I had no choice. They wanted a child. They loved you on sight." Laurel cried.

"Yes, they loved me and gave me everything a child could ever want, except one thing. The truth. They led me to believe I was theirs. They let me believe I belonged." Billie was starting to raise her voice, on the verge of losing her temper. "Do you know what it feels like to find out that your life has been a lie? Do you have any idea how that feels, Mother?" Billie raged.

Laurel reached up again to touch Billie's face. Again, Billie knocked her hand away. "I'm sorry, Suzanne. I ... I ... " she cried.

"My name is NOT Suzanne!" Billie screamed into the woman's face. "Suzanne died 32 years ago when her mother threw her away like a piece of trash!"

"Billie, that's enough," Cat said angrily, coming to stand between Billie and Laurel. Dylan also rose to his feet, ready to defend his mother should this crazy woman become more than just verbally abusive.

Without breaking eye contact with Laurel, Billie put her hands on Cat's shoulders and firmly moved her out of the way. "Cat. This is between my mother and I. Please stay out of it," Billie demanded.

Cat pushed her way back in between the two women. "No, I won't stay out of it. You are my wife, and I will NOT stand by and let you lose control like this. Do you understand?" Cat said.

Both women were so distraught that neither of them realized Cat had revealed the true nature of their relationship to Laurel and Dylan.

Billie just reached out with one arm and literally pushed Cat out of the line of fire as firmly as possible without hurting her. "I said to stay out of it, Cat," Billie said firmly, turning her attention once more to Laurel, who was staring wide eyed at her.

Billie was about to unload both barrels at Laurel again, when an intense pain ran through her temple, bringing her to her knees. Cat was by her side immediately. "Damn you, Billie," she said. "I told you not to work yourself up like this."

"What's wrong with her?" Dylan asked as he watched his sister convulse and twitch on the floor.

Cat and Laurel were immediately on their knees beside her. "Cat?" Laurel said, fear clouding her vision.

"She's having a seizure, Laurel. She's an epileptic," Cat explained.

"Epileptic?" questioned Laurel.

Cat was monitoring Billie's vital signs as the seizure wracked her body. Looking at Laurel, she said, "Billie developed epilepsy after she took a bullet to the brain while stopping our daughter's kidnapper, Laurel."

Laurel was confused. "Kidnappers? You have a daughter?" the woman asked.

"You have three beautiful grandchildren, Laurel. A boy and two girls. Billie and I love them dearly. They are very much a part of what makes us whole. Billie would die for them, as would I, if necessary. Keep that thought in mind when you think about what happened here today," Cat suggested.

Just then, a particularly violent tremor ripped through Billie's body.

"Will she be all right?" Laurel asked frantically.

"Yes. The seizure will pass in a few minutes. She'll be disoriented for a while, then she'll sleep for several hours. I'll bring her back to our hotel room as soon as the convulsions pass," Cat explained.

"No, please, stay here," Laurel said.

"Mom," Dylan warned. "What about Dad? You know how he feels about ... you know," Dylan said, motioning his head in the direction of Cat and Billie.

Cat caught on immediately. "Are you trying to say that your father would object to 'our kind'? Are you saying that he hates gays?" Cat asked angrily.

Dylan just nodded, ashamed of himself for bringing it up.

Cat sat back on her heels and ran a hand through her hair. She sighed deeply, thinking that this whole quest had been nothing but trouble from the start. Looking up at Dylan, she said, "Well, you don't have to worry about it. I'm taking her back to our hotel room, right now in fact," Cat said, as she noticed Billie's tremors had stopped and she was coming to.

"Cat?" Billie said weakly, opening her eyes.

"I'm here love. Come on, we're going back to our room. You need to sleep," Cat said. She helped the taller woman to her feet and walked her out to the car, refusing help from Laurel.

After seat belting a groggy Billie into the passenger seat, Cat circled back around the car where Laurel was waiting. Dylan stood in the doorway of the house.

"Cat. I want to see her again. There is so much I want to say to her, so much she doesn't know. Please, let me see her," Laurel pleaded, tears in her eyes.

"I'm not so sure that's a good idea, Laurel. As you could see, intense emotional stress can trigger a seizure. It kills me to watch her go through one of these. Do you know this is her third seizure since she started searching for you just two weeks ago? She hadn't had a seizure for an entire year prior to that!" Cat tried to explain.

"Cat, I promise, if she starts to become upset, I will leave. Please let me see her again," Laurel begged once more.

Cat could see the sincerity in this woman's face. Maybe there was more to the adoption than meets the eye. Laurel was the only one who could answer that. Talking a deep breath, Cat replied, "Laurel, I'll talk to her later tonight, after she's had a chance to recover her strength. If she wants to see you, then I'll call you. Otherwise, we will be on a flight home tomorrow."

"I understand, " Laurel said. "Please wait here a moment while I write our phone number down for you," she said before returning to the house.

While Laurel was gone, Dylan approached Cat, who was now leaning against the driver's side of the car, waiting for Laurel to return. Billie was still sitting groggily in the front seat.

"Cat, I want to apologize for that comment I made, and I'm sorry that Billie is ill. I hope she feels better soon. Maybe we'll see you later," he said, walking away as his mother returned to the car carrying a piece of paper.

"Here is the phone number, Cat. Please talk to her. I want desperately to explain things to her. Please encourage her to give me the chance," Laurel said.

Cat just nodded her head and turned to get into the car. Suddenly she stopped and looked at Laurel. "By the way, Laurel, as the fates would have it, we know of someone else who is looking for you. Someone who loves you very much and wants desperately to get to know you."

Laurel narrowed her eyes in a gesture so much like Billie that Cat had to restrain herself from reaching out and touching her face. "Who?" she asked.

"Your own mother," Cat said as she climbed into the car.

Laurel stood there, dumbstruck as Cat drove away.

************************************************************************************************ CHAPTER XIV

Billie slept for several hours. While she was sleeping, Cat spent her time making phone calls, first calling Jen to check on the kids and to fill her friend in on what had happened, and then to Mel and Janice. The call to Mel was difficult. Mel was elated that they had found her daughter, but disturbed by the confrontation between her and Billie.

"Grams, it was awful. Billie was so angry and hurtful. Laurel tried very hard to calm her and to explain what had happened all those years ago, but Billie just wouldn't let her," Cat explained. "The worse part, is that Billie worked herself up into such an emotional tizzy, that she fell into another seizure, right there in front of Laurel. Of course, not knowing what was wrong, Laurel was beside herself with worry when it happened. I had to get her out of there," Cat finished.

"Caitlain, where is Billie now? Is she all right?" Mel asked.

"She's fine. She's sleeping now, right here beside me. The seizures take a lot out of her, Grams. I don't know how long she'll be out this time," Cat said.

"Well, I think Janice and I should get on a plane right now and join you," Mel said.

"Grams, I know you're anxious to see Laurel, but I think we need to resolve the problems between her and Billie first, before we add another contestant. I told Laurel that you were looking for her, Grams. She doesn't know any more than that yet. We didn't have time for more, I had to get Billie back to the hotel and put her to bed," Cat finished.

"I understand, Caitlain. Do you think you'll see Laurel again before you leave?" Mel asked hopefully.

"I don't know. She wants to see Billie again. She said there were so many things Billie didn't understand," Cat said.

"What are you going to do next?" Mel asked.

"I'm going to wait for Billie to wake up and then talk to her about Laurel. If she wants to go home, I'll make the reservations immediately. If she wants to see Laurel again, I'll call and set it up. It all depends on Billie right now," Cat finished.

**********

Cat was standing in the window looking out over the lake when Billie awoke. Rolling over to her side to face her wife, Billie called out her name.

Cat?" she said.

Cat turned around. "Hey! How are you feeling?" she asked, walking over to sit on the edge of the bed. Cat reached out and affectionately brushed the hair off Billie's forehead.

"Tired, weak, headachy. I had another seizure, didn't I?" Billie asked.

Cat just nodded her head.

Billie rolled over onto her back and looked at the ceiling. "Cat," she said, "maybe I should give up this quest and go home. We'll give Laurel's name and address to Mel and let her deal with it if she wants, but maybe looking for my mother was a mistake," she said.

Cat climbed onto the bed and laid on her stomach, propping herself up on her forearms so that she could look at Billie as she talked. "Do you really want to do that after you've come this far, love?" she asked.

Billie looked at Cat, confusion etched deeply into her face. "I need your advice, Cat. What should I do?" she asked.

"Well," Cat said, "first off, I think you were a little rough on Laurel this afternoon. Billie, she wants desperately for a chance to explain why she made the choices she did. You've come so far in this search, love. I think you owe it to yourself to listen to what she has to say," Cat suggested.

"You think so?" Billie asked.

"Yes, I do, Billie. Once you know the truth, you can decide for yourself if you can live with it. If not, we can put this behind us and go on with our lives. If you can live with it, you'll have found your mother, and your life will be richer for it. I can't make this decision for you, love, but whatever you decide, I will support you," Cat finished.

Billie reached up to cup the side of Cat's face. Nodding, she said, "You're right, Cat. If I don't give her the chance to explain, I will spend the rest of my life wondering," Billie paused as she held Cat's gaze and thought for the millionth time about how lucky she was to have this woman in her life. "I'll call and ask her to dinner. Is that all right with you?" she asked Cat.

Cat thought for a moment. Dinner was a nice idea. It would give them a chance to talk socially, and get to know each other a little better before jumping into the private details of their lives. After dinner, they could find a nice quiet place to talk, and hopefully, by the end of the evening, Billie would have her answers, and they would be able to make a decision about how to proceed with their lives, with or without Laurel in them.

"Do you want to call her now?" Cat asked.

Billie nodded as she sat up, reaching for the phone.

Cat dug the phone number out of the pocket of her jeans and handed it to Billie, who accepted it with shaky hands.

"Do you want me to make the call for you, Billie?" Cat asked.

"No, Cat. I have to do this myself," she said as she dialed the number.

"Hello?" came a man's voice from the other end of the phone.

"Hello, may I speak to Laurel, please?" Billie asked, thinking to herself that this was not Dylan she was talking to.

"May I ask whose calling?" the man said.

"Billie," she supplied.

"Hold on," came the reply.

Moments later, a breathless Laurel answered the phone. "Billie?" she said cautiously.

"Yes, Laurel, this is Billie. First let me apologize for the way I treated you earlier. I didn't give you a chance to explain, and for that I am sorry," Billie said. "Cat and I would like to take you to dinner tonight if you're free. I think we have a lot to talk about. I'd like to start over and do this civilly," she added.

Laurel was very misty-eyed on the other end of the phone. "Yes, I would like that, and Billie, I have so much to say to you, so much to explain. Thank you for giving me the chance to do that," she said.

"Cat and I will pick you up at 6 pm, okay? Since you know the area, we'll depend on you to select a restaurant. All right then, we'll see you at six," Billie said before hanging up.

Hanging up the phone, she took a deep breath and looked at Cat. "It's a start," she said.

Cat just nodded and smiled.

**********

The atmosphere at dinner was very tense, filled with polite "safe" conversation, during which they learned of each other's jobs, hobbies and interests. They went to a very nice seafood restaurant on the shores of Lake Huron, however, if asked later, none of the three women would remember what they had eaten, the air was so thick with emotion. Billie learned more about her brother, Dylan. That he was 25 years old, had just completed his degree in veterinary medicine and was just now starting to establish a practice. Laurel was careful not to ask too many personal questions, afraid that if she learned too much and was rejected later, that it would pain her too deeply. Finally dinner was over and a decision needed to be made about whether to part company, or to continue getting acquainted.

Walking back to the car, Billie stopped before reaching for the passenger door handle. Looking at Laurel, she asked, "Would you like to come back to our room to talk, or would you like us to bring you home?"

Without hesitation, Laurel opted for the first choice. "Please, let's talk. I have so much I need to say to you."

Nodding, Billie opened the door and slid into the car. Soon, they were on their way back to the hotel.

The first thing Laurel noticed when they entered the hotel room, was the fact that there was only one bed. The thought ran through her mind that she would have to accept and get used to the fact that her daughter was gay if she hoped to have a future in her life.

Cat climbed onto the bed and sat cross legged as Billie stood by the window. Laurel perched herself in the only chair that occupied the room. For long moments, silence permeated the air, making Laurel squirm in her seat. Finally, she took the initiative to start the conversation.

"Billie, I know you must hate me, and you have every right to at this point, but please let me explain what drove me to make the choices I did thirty-two years ago when I gave you up for adoption," she started.

Billie abruptly turned away from the window. "You sold me, Mother," she said.

"Billie, please give her a chance to explain," Cat said.

"No, Cat, she's right. I did sell her. That act is the one thing I regret most in my life. I know now, that no amount of money in the world is worth losing a child over. It was a hard lesson to learn," she said.

Laurel rose from her chair and started pacing. "I'm not sure where to start," she said to herself as she continued her trek back and forth across the room. Finally, she stopped and looked at Billie. "I guess I'll start with my own childhood. A lot of what happened there drove me to make the decisions I did." Taking a deep breath, she began her story. "I knew from an early age that I was adopted. My mother tried very hard to make the adoption sound like I was a heaven-sent gift to her and my father, however, my father sent a completely different message. He was never a very affectionate man ... at least not in the way a father is supposed to be affectionate with his daughter," she said, "but he was a good provider."

Immediately, a suspicious look passed between Cat and Billie. Their attention was draw back to Laurel as she continued.

"Unfortunately, he didn't realize that it wasn't his financial support that I needed, it was his love ... and not the kind of warped love he offered. You see, he started molesting me when I was thirteen."

Billie's fists clenched in anger as Laurel continued. "It started out innocently enough. A few inappropriate touches here and there, an occasional kiss that was just a little too intimate to be considered father/daughter. By the time I was fifteen, he became bolder, coming into my room at night and touching me while he masturbated."

"Oh gods!" Cat said as she rose off the bed and into Billie's arms. The words coming out of Laurel's mouth were making her ill.

"I'm sorry, Cat. Maybe I shouldn't be telling you this," Laurel said.

"No. No, go on, please. The healing has to start somewhere. I'll be all right," Cat said as she hugged Billie's waist a little tighter.

"All right," Laurel said. "As I was saying, he became bolder and bolder as the years went on. I was seventeen the first time he actually penetrated me."

"Why didn't you tell your mother, Laurel?" Billie asked.

"I did," she said. "Billie, you need to understand something. My father was a very domineering man. He had total control of his household, and he kept it that way through brute force. Both my mother and I had fallen victim to his tirades on several occasions. Neither of us dared to cross him, for fear of the punishment that would surely follow. I told my mother about the abuse, but what could she do?" Laurel reasoned.

"She could have taken you and left," Billie supplied angrily.

"Billie, she was uneducated and totally dependent on him," Laurel said. "In her mind, she had no choice. I do not fault her for her reasoning, Billie. She just didn't know any better." An uncomfortable silence fell over the room for the next few moments.

While Laurel gathered her thoughts, Billie walked over to the bed and sat down, her back propped up against the headboard. Cat crawled up and sat between her legs, her back resting up against Billie's chest, Billie's chin resting on the top of her head. Finally, Laurel was ready to speak again.

"Okay, where was I. Oh yes, I was seventeen the first time he raped me. I felt so dirty and guilty. He convinced me that it was my fault and that if I told anyone, I would be ridiculed and considered a slut and a whore by everyone I told. If I resisted him, he beat me. I was miserable. The rapes continued at a rate of once or twice a week until I left home to go to college about a year and a half later. I was thrilled to be out of the house, but I worried the whole time about what my mother was enduring while I was gone. Her letters indicated that things were fine, but by then, she was a master at putting on a good front for the public. She worked very hard for several years, hiding my father's sins."

Laurel paused to catch her breath and noticed that Cat had shifted, and was now curled up in a fetal position in Billie's arms. Billie was wrapped around the smaller woman as though protecting her from something. Frowning, Laurel wondered if there was some significance behind the move, but put the thought aside to continue her story.

When I was twenty two, I came home between the semesters of my senior year. He couldn't even make it through my first night home before falling into his old habits, only this time, I couldn't take it any more. The next morning, I left and returned to school to stay on campus for the rest of the break. Little did I know at the time, that one night had changed my life forever. By the time the semester break ended nearly a month later, I realized I was pregnant."

Billie gasped, causing Cat to nearly jump out of her skin. Leaning forward, with Cat still in her arms, she said, "Laurel, are you telling me that the man who adopted you is my father?" she asked.

Cat cringed, remembering the abusive tone he had used with Julia when she had called to find Laurel.

Laurel looked directly at Billie. "Yes, that is exactly what I am saying. Your father is Howard Mcguire."

Billie sat back again, leaning her head against the headboard and closing her eyes. "By the gods," she thought. "How would I have handled that? Could I have raised a child that was forced upon me like that? A child that was the product of incest?" As Billie contemplated these thoughts, another one entered her mind. "Cat endured two rapes, and lovingly accepted the children that resulted from them. Tara and Sky. I can't imagine life without them." In her mind, Billie reasoned that if Cat had the strength and courage to keep her children, then Laurel should have had as well.

Laurel continued with her story. "So, here I was, twenty-two years old, no job, no home. I was too ashamed to return to classes when the spring semester started, so I dropped out of school. I held various odd jobs, including waitressing and bar tending, but I wasn't able to hold any of them for very long, especially when my employers discovered I was pregnant. I couldn't return home. My father had banned me from the house, probably afraid that I would reveal him as the father of my child if I did. Instead, he convinced the family that I was, in his words, 'bad seed', and that I had gone out and gotten myself in trouble like the slut he had always warned me I would be. I had nowhere to go, and in my mind, I had no hope and no future, so I fell in with a bad group of people. Soon, I was involved with drugs and alcohol. The night you were born, Billie, I was so high on drugs, that I don't even remember the birth. When you had that seizure at my home earlier today, I was afraid that you had been born with epilepsy as a result of my drug abuse when I carried you. I would have never forgiven myself for that."

Laurel rose from her chair and walked over to the window. Her back was to Billie and Cat, but they could tell that she was crying when she lifted her right hand to wipe her eyes. Cat sat up and looked at Billie, compassion in her eyes for this woman who was obviously in tremendous pain with her memories.

Laurel continued, her back still to the two women on the bed, her voice shaky from tears she was trying so desperately to hold back. "When you were born, Billie, I named you Suzanne. It was such a pretty name, and you were such a beautiful baby. I tried to keep you, truly, I did. You were three months old before I finally gave you up. I couldn't support you. My drug habit was more powerful than my maternal instincts, I guess." Laurel paused to choke back a sob, her shoulders shaking under the strain. "You were hungry all the time, you cried constantly. Hell, we didn't even have a home. We were living in a flop house full of other drug addicts. My body was desperate for the drugs I had come to depend on. So I did the only thing I could think of -- I sold you. I sold my child for drug money!" she proclaimed, finally breaking down as violent sobs wracked her body.

Billie was there to catch her as she sank to the floor. Strong arms wrapped around the weeping woman, holding her and, rocking her as they both cried out their anguish, shedding tears of lost memories they would never share. Cat was a total wreck, sitting on the bed so recently vacated by Billie, knees drawn up to her chest, arms wrapped around them tightly as she too shed tears of regret. Billie looked up from her position the floor and saw the naked pain in her wife's eyes. Reaching out a hand, she motioned for Cat to join her. Soon, all three women were sitting on the floor wrapped in each other's arms as they poured their pain into a common font of cleansing.

**********

The drive back to Laurel's home was relatively quiet, the two women in the car barely speaking at all. Cat came to a stop in front of the house and turned off the ignition. Turning in her seat, she looked at Laurel and said, "Are you all right?"

Laurel looked down at her clasped hands in her lap, then turned her head to look at Cat. "I've been better," she said. "But I'm more concerned about how Billie is."

"Billie is a very strong woman, Laurel. There have been a lot of problems and hardships that she has endured in her life ... problems that are not my place to talk about. She will have to decide if and when to tell you. But know this, Billie is a survivor. She has such strength and endurance, and such depth for forgiveness and acceptance, that I sometimes look at myself and pale terribly in comparison. Her capacity for love is boundless. I have never in my life felt as safe, loved or needed as I have since I met mer. She is my life, Laurel. Together we are whole. I can only hope that I have half her strength of character," Cat said passionately. "So, where you are right to be concerned, know that she will rebound, and together, we will go on and be stronger for the experience," Cat finished.

Laurel wiped a tear from her eye. "My heart is so heavy with regret, Cat. I have failed her. I have failed miserably. My only hope is that some day she will find it in her heart to let me in, to forgive me for wronging her so horribly. I hope the Watermans are smiling down on her right now, because they raised one hell of a daughter." Laurel took a deep breath and slowly let it out.

Cat sat quietly, watching the play of emotions cross Laurel's features. It was so obvious where Billie's physical beauty had come from. She found herself wondering if she was looking at Billie in another 20 years. She certainly hoped so; this woman sitting before her was still breathtaking, even at fifty-five years old.

Laurel felt Cat's eyes on her. Turning, she looked directly into emerald green eyes. "What are you thinking?" she asked the red haired woman.

Cat smiled. "I was thinking about how beautiful you are, and how much Billie looks like you," she confessed.

Laurel blushed and looked back down at the hands in her lap. "She probably considers that a curse, right now," she said.

Cat reached out and touched Laurel's hand, causing the woman to look into her eyes. "Laurel," she said. "You have given Billie a lot to think about, and right now she may be filled with anger and hurtful regret, but give her time," Cat said. Then, smiling, she added, "Once she's had a chance to think about things, she'll want to talk, and I'll listen. It's one of the things I do best ... well, that and cook. Did you know your daughter can't even boil water?" she added, causing Laurel to chuckle. "There, that's better," Cat said, lifting Laurel's chin with her hand. "Billie has your smile."

Laurel fished a tissue out of her bag and wiped her tears. "I'd better let you go," she said. "I'm sure Billie's watching the clock, wondering where you are," Laurel added.

Cat just nodded.

Shoving the tissue back into her purse, Laurel reached for the door handle and then stopped. Turning back to Cat, she leaned over and kissed her tenderly on the cheek, then hugged her fiercely. "Thank you for giving me the chance to set things right with my daughter, Cat. I'll never forget what you have done for me," she said.

Cat smiled through misty eyes as she watched Laurel walk up the path to her house.

When Cat arrived back a the hotel, she found Billie sleeping, curled up in the middle of the bed in a fetal position, the blankets and sheets in wild disarray around her. It was obvious that sleep had been anything but restful. Peeling off her clothes, she slipped a T-shirt over her head and slipped into bed behind Billie. Billie visibly relaxed as Cat spooned herself in comfortably behind her long frame. Kissing the shoulder blade in front of her, Cat whispered into her wife's hair, "Relax my love. You are safe, you are home in my arms. I love you, Billie." Kissing her once more, Cat laid her head down and joined Billie in sleep.

************************************************************************************************ CHAPTER XV

Cat awoke the following morning to find something unusual, Billie still in bed asleep. It was a rare occasion when the taller woman didn't rise first and set out for her morning run well before the shorter red head decided to greet the day. Coming up onto one elbow and reaching over Billie's sleeping form, Cat placed her hand on her wife's forehead, checking for signs of illness. There were none. "Huh," Cat said as she retracted her hand and started to rise.

Cat suddenly found herself on her back, with a blue eyed monster hovering over her. Apparently, Billie had been playing opossum and grabbed Cat while she tried to get up, pulling her back down and in one smooth motion, gained a positional advantage over her.

"Just where do you think you're going?" the monster asked.

"I've gotta go pee!" Cat replied urgently.

"Pee?" the monster asked.

"Pee! Now let me up before I make us both very uncomfortable!" Cat warned, scooting out from under Billie and running to the bathroom.

Billie sat up in bed, chuckling. Reaching for the phone, she ordered breakfast for both of them, then settled back down under the covers and pretended to be sound asleep again.

When Cat came out of the bathroom and saw Billie burrowed back under the covers, she rev'ed up her engines and ran full steam ahead at the bed, jumping up and landing right on the prone woman.

"Ooommmph!" exclaimed Billie as Cat landed. Within seconds, she had the smaller woman trapped under her again, this time, with her sitting on Cat's stomach, her thighs straddling each side, and her hands pinning Cat's shoulders to the bed.

"Why you ......!" Cat sputtered as she managed to wiggle her hands free and found Billie's one ultra tickly spot. Moments later, Billie surrendered.

"I give up! I give up! You win. Please stop!" she begged as Cat finally relented and rolled off her.

Billie rolled over to Cat, partially pinning her to the bed and kissed her soundly. "Thank you, love. I really needed to start my day laughing," Billie said.

"You're welcome. Now shut up and kiss me," she demanded.

Billie was more than happy to oblige. Unfortunately for Cat, seconds into the kiss, a knock came at the door. "Room Service," a voice said from the hall.

Cat looked at Billie questioningly. Billie just shrugged her shoulders and plastered an innocent look on her face. Climbing off the bed, Cat padded over to the door and let the waiter in, pushing a cart in front of him. "Enjoy your breakfast," he said as he left the room.

Cat started taking the covers off the dishes and found a delectable array of pastries and fruits, along with two plates, each containing a fluffy omelet, home fries and toast. The whole meal was complimented by rich hot aromatic coffee. Cat's mouth watered at the sight. She spared a glance at Billie and saw a coy expression there.

"You did this, didn't you?" she asked.

Billie just raised her eyebrows and nodded her head up and down. Smiling, Cat put the covers back over the food, and crawled up the length of the bed to soundly kiss her wife and thank her for being so thoughtful. Then, she quickly retrieved their omelets and brought them both over to the bed. Climbing back up, she sat beside Billie, and together, they feasted while they talked about the previous day's events.

"So, how are you feeling today, love?" Cat asked.

After taking a sip of coffee, Billie replied, "I'm fine. Still a little tired ... probably from the seizure, but I'm okay."

"Laurel and I had a nice talk when I brought her home last night," Cat said.

Billie stopped chewing for a second and looked at Cat. Then, swallowing, she said, "Oh yeah? What about?"

"She feels horrible, Billie. She feels like she failed you miserably," Cat said.

"Yeah, well, she did," Billie replied, becoming a little irritated with the conversation.

"Billie, can you understand what drove her to give you up? She really thought she was doing what was best for you. She couldn't take care of you," Cat explained.

"She could have cleaned up her act, Cat. She should have given up her drugs, NOT her child." Billie replied angrily.

"Sweetheart, I understand why you're so angry, but think about what drove her to the drugs to begin with. Can you imagine being raped by your own father! Billie, some people just can't get over the trauma that occurs during a rape!" Cat reminded her.

"You did! You did, Cat! Twice! Yet, you didn't give up. You didn't turn to drugs. You didn't give your children away!" Billie said, tears starting to form in her eyes. "Damn it! I thought I had cried this all out last night," she added, wiping her eyes.

Cat reached over and took Billie's hand in hers. Kissing the knuckles, she held it close to her heart and looked into Billie's eyes. "Billie, when Tara was conceived, I had a loving family around to help me through it. With Sky, I had you. Laurel had no support network. All she had was a weak mother, and the man who abused her in the first place. Who else did she have to turn to? Billie ... think about it. Where would I have been if I hadn't had the support to get through it?" Cat paused, watching Billie carefully as a parade of emotions crossed her face. "Sweetheart, open that big beautiful heart of yours and try to find a place in it for Laurel. She needs you right now, and whether you'll admit it or not, you need her too," Cat finished.

Billie held Cat's eyes with her own, tears threatening to spill from both. Billie's bottom lip trembled with emotion.

"Please, Billie. Please let the pain out. Until you do, there will be no room for anyone or anything else. Please," Cat said.

Billie closed her eyes, allowing the tears to overflow onto her cheeks as she nodded her head yes. "I'll try, Cat. I'll try," she said.

**********

"Hello" came the voice from the other end of the line.

"Laurel? This is Billie,"

Silence.

"Laurel? Are you there?" Billie asked.

"Uhm, Billie. I didn't expect to hear from you," Laurel replied, her voice laced with emotion.

"Well, I didn't expect to be calling," Billie answered, receiving a dirty look from Cat, who was standing by, holding her hand for support through this conversation.

"I'm glad you called. I felt so bad leaving you in such a state last night," Laurel said.

"You had no problem leaving me thirty-two years ago, Mother!" Billie said sharply.

"Billie! That was uncalled for!" Cat declared angrily, abruptly releasing her hand and walking a few feet away.

"Billie, is that Cat?" Laurel asked. "May I talk to her?"

"Sure," Billie said, handing the phone to Cat. "She wants to talk to you. Go figure!"

Narrowing her eyes at Billie, she took the phone and placed the receiver up to her ear. "Yes?" she said.

"Cat, I just wanted to thank you again for last night, and to say that I deserve everything Billie says about me. Please don't be angry with her. She has the right to feel that way," Laurel said.

"Laurel, she has no right to be disrespectful. What is done is done. It's in the past, and that's where it belongs. Look Laurel, you made your apologies last night, and now Billie has to decide whether to accept them or not, but she has no right to be disrespectful," Cat said.

"Let me talk to her," Billie said.

"Hold on, Laurel. Billie wants to talk again," Cat said, handing the phone to Billie.

Billie took the phone and covered the receiver with her other hand. Looking at Cat, she bent down and kissed the smaller woman tenderly. "I'm sorry, Cat. I'm being an ass, and I know it. I'm sorry," she said again.

Cat looked at her sternly. "It's not me you owe the apology to, Billie," she said, walking away to stand at the window, her back to Billie.

Billie looked at Cat's retreating back and knew in her heart that she was right. Lifting the receiver to her ear, she said, "Laurel, I'm sorry. I've been acting like a fool. I have a lot to think about, and a lot to adjust to, and I'm afraid I'm not handling it very well. Look, Cat and I would like to see you again. We have to make a decision about what to do next, where to go next, and you are part of that decision. Can we meet you somewhere?" Billie asked.

"There's a park on the outskirts of town, bordered by a lake. It's beautiful at this time of year. I can either give you directions, or you can pick me up," Laurel suggested.

"Well pick you up. Can you be ready in 15 minutes?" Billie asked.

"I'll be waiting by the curb," Laurel replied.

Billie hung up the phone and approached Cat, who still had her back to her. Wrapping her long arms around the smaller woman, she pulled Cat back into her embrace and laid her cheek on top of the smaller woman's head. "I'm sorry, Cat. This is just so damned hard. Part of me wants to kill her, the other part wants to be held by her. I don't know what to do," said.

"Listen to your heart, not your head, Billie. What she did was wrong. There is no denying that. But what she feels for you now is right. She loves you, Billie, and you may never be able to love her back, but you need to forgive her and move on with your own life. This hurt you are feeling right now is like a thorn in your side. It will continue to fester until it consumes you body and soul," Cat said.

Cat turned around in Billie's arms to look her directly in the face.

"Billie, how many times have you told me that I am the other half of your soul?" Cat asked.

"Too many time to count," Billie replied.

"Then keep in mind love, if this hurt and anger consumes your soul, then it will consume me as well." Cat explained.

Billie's eyes opened wide, filling up with tears at the realization of what Cat was saying. "By the gods Cat. I can't let that happen. I can't lose you!" she cried.

"Then don't lose yourself, love. Don't lose yourself to the anger. Let it go. For both of us," Cat pleaded.

Billie forced a smile through the tears. Bending down, she kissed Cat tenderly, then looked her in the eyes and said, "Let's go get Mom. We've got a lot of talking to do."

**********

Fifteen minutes later, Cat and Billie pulled up in front of Laurel's house, and true to her word, found her waiting at the curb. Climbing into the back seat, Laurel gave Cat instructions on how to get to the lake, then focused her attention on Billie, who had turned around in her seat to look at her.

"Billie, I can't tell you how much this means to me. I really appreciate you seeing me again," Laurel said sincerely.

Billie caught a look from Cat out of the corner of her eye before responding to Laurel. "Cat has made me realize that harboring this hurt inside will only damage both of us in the long run. I need to find a way to get through this and come out whole at the end. We all do," she finished.

Laurel smiled at Billie as she nodded her head in agreement.

The drive to the lake was relatively short. Moments later, the three women were walking along the shore in silence. Billie was holding Cat's hand tightly, using the smaller woman to anchor her in reality as she strove to find a way to talk to this woman she called Mother, without losing her temper. Finally, they spotted a park bench on a grassy knoll overlooking the water and made their way to it.

Billie and Laurel sat on the bench while Cat sat cross legged on the grass in front of them, randomly pulling the green blades out of the ground. An uneasy silence permeated the atmosphere around the ladies.

Finally, Laurel spoke. "Billie, please talk to me. Tell me what's on your mind."

Billie looked at her mother. "What's on my mind? There's so much on my mind that it would take forever to say it," Billie said.

Laurel reached over and touched Billie's hand. Billie flinched slightly, but did not shrug it off. "For you, Billie, I have forever. Please tell me," Laurel replied.

Billie dropped her chin to her chest, fighting desperately to keep her emotions under control. Finally, she lifted her head and looked at Laurel. "Didn't you ever wonder what had happened to me? Where I was? How I was doing?" Billie asked, her voice cracking near the end of the sentence.

Laurel took a deep breath. "Never a day went by that I didn't think of you. Never a day went by that I didn't regret the weaknesses and faults that drove me to that most heinous act. I was weak, Billie. I was a coward. A big piece of me died the day I handed you over to the Waterman's lawyer. I felt like my heart was being torn right out of my chest. But I knew that you would be happier in a stable home with two loving parents. I swear, If I had it to do again, I would have done anything to keep you," Laurel explained, whispering that last sentence.

Billie rose to her feet and started pacing back and forth, clenching her fists repeatedly. Cat watched her cautiously, ready to intervene if Billie got out of control. Finally, she stopped in front of Laurel and looked directly into her eyes.

"I feel like part of me has died, Laurel," she said. "My whole past has been a lie. The only truly real things in my life are my wife and children. I have such ANGER in here!" Billie raged loudly, her voice deepened and raspy with emotion as she pounded repeatedly at her chest, loud enough to hear thumps.

Laurel held eye contact with Billie through the tirade, regret and pain clearly written in their blue depths. "I loved you, Billie. I have always loved you. Giving you up was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. Please forgive me," she pleaded.

Billie broke the contact and strode away a few paces. Falling to her knees in the grass, she buried her face in her hands and cried out her anguish. Billie's torturous cries tore through Cat's heart as she watched her soul mate rock back and forth, arms wrapped around her middle, and head thrown back, as she cried out her pain. Cat kept her distance to allow the cleansing ritual to work its medicine. Finally, emotionally and physically spent, Billie collapsed to the ground and curled up into a ball, repeatedly catching her breath in hiccuping gasps.

Cat was a total wreck, nearly in as much pain as Billie as she crawled over to her wife and laid her head down on Billie's cheek. Billie was so distraught, that Cat wasn't sure she even realized where she was. "Billie, sweetheart," Cat said, kissing her cheek. "Sweetheart, talk to me, please."

Billie blinked her eyes, focusing in on Cat. "Cat," she said softly.

"I'm here love. I'm right here," Cat said, brushing the bangs off her forehead.

"Laurel?" Billie asked.

Hearing her name, Laurel rose from her position on the bench and approached her distraught daughter, kneeling on the ground in front of her. "I'm here too, Billie," she said.

Billie reached out her hand to Laurel, who took it into her own and held it close to her heart. Tears streamed down Laurel's face as Billie smiled at her.

"Come on, up you go," said Cat as she and Laurel helped Billie to her feet and walked her over to the bench. The three women sat there for a long time, desperately clinging to each other, trying to reaffirm their places in each other's lives, Billie in the middle, book-ended by Cat on her right and Laurel on her left. No words passed between them, save the silent communication of their hearts.

************************************************************************************************ CHAPTER XVI

Cat and Billie dropped Laurel off at home and returned to their room, after making plans for dinner with their combined families, Jim included.

Back in their room, Cat held Billie in her arms, Billie's head on her shoulder, their legs entwined, her arm thrown across Cat's waist, as they laid on the bed and talked about their meeting with Laurel.

"I was very proud of you Billie. How do you feel, love," Cat asked Billie.

"I'm tired, Cat. My eyes burn, my chest hurts, but my heart feels lighter, cleansed." Billie replied.

Cat smiled. Turning her head, she kissed Billie's forehead. "Does that mean you've forgiven Laurel?" she asked.

"It means the anger is gone. Some of the hurt is still here, but I guess in time, it will fade." Billie answered. "Does that mean I forgive her? I don't know, Cat. What I do know, is that I understand her pain and sense of loss. I understand it, because I share it," she said.

Cat just nodded her head. "I'm glad she and Dylan are flying to Charleston with us tomorrow. Grandma Mel is so anxious to meet Laurel. Imagine, Billie ... just imagine after fifty-five years, finding the daughter you thought had died during childbirth," Cat said incredulously.

"Maybe something good will come of this search after all, love," Billie said.

"Something good has already come of it, Billie. You have your mother, and a brother you didn't know existed. You've always wanted siblings. Now you've got one," Cat pointed out to her tall lover.

Billie grinned when she thought of Dylan standing up to her when they appeared on Laurel's doorstep yesterday. "Yeah, a little brother. I do kind of like that idea," she said.

"Do you realize, love, that yesterday morning, you were an orphan, and today, you not only have a mother, but a brother and step father! Do you think Jim will come to dinner with us tonight?" Cat asked.

"No, I don't think so. I'm not sure if he'll ever warm up to us, Cat. Only time will tel,." Billie observed, yawning.

"Sleep, love. You've had a very emotional afternoon ... we all have," Cat said. "I love you, Billie. Thank you for pulling the thorn out of my soul," she said, closing her own eyes and drifted off to sleep.

Billie lifted her head and placed a gentle kiss on Cat's lips. "You're welcome, Cat. I love you too," she said.

Soon, both women were fast asleep.

**********

As suspected, Jim was not with Laurel and Dylan when they met the ladies at the restaurant. Laurel shrugged her shoulders when Billie asked her about it.

At dinner that evening, the three women, and Dylan talked about Mel and Janice. No details were given about the circumstances surrounding Laurel's adoption, except that Mel had been told Laurel was stillborn. Billie and Cat felt it would be best for Mel to discuss the details with Laurel, however, they felt it was important for Laurel to realize that Mel had not intentionally given her away. They also filled her in on the personalities of the two women, and what to expect when she met Janice.

Finally, they told Laurel that she had a sister, Ida. She was a little confused at first that Janice was Cat's material grandmother, and that Mel was Billie's. It seems odd, and not at all coincidental that the granddaughters of these two women would meet and fall in love more than fifty years after they had. She found herself wondering if there was some force at work that brought these four women together.

Dylan was intrigued by the description of his grandmothers, and secretly thought it was cool that they were gay. Laurel on the other hand was having a difficult time dealing with gay parents as well as a gay daughter. Billie assumed her discomfort was due mostly to her husband's prejudice against homosexuals in general.

"Did you tell Jim about Cat and I when you got home last night?" Billie asked Laurel.

Laurel nodded her head and looked down into her plate with a sad expression on her face.

"I take it, he wasn't very happy about it?" asked Cat.

Laurel looked up at her daughter and daughter-in-law. "You guessed right," she said. "Interestingly enough, though, is that he had a harder time with the fact that I had kept it secret from him all these years, than the fact that you are gay," Laurel explained.

"You mean he accepts that we're gay?" Billie asked.

"I wouldn't exactly call it acceptance, Sis," Dylan said, making Billie smile at the endearment. "Resignation is a more fitting description. I mean, what choice does he have?"

Laurel turned to her son. "In all fairness, sweetie, we gave your father a lot to deal with last night. I mean, in one evening, he learns that he has a step daughter, daughter-in-law, three grandchildren and two more mother-in-laws, and to top it all off, four of his new family members live a lifestyle that is totally contrary what he believes in!" she explained.

"Do you think he's capable of accepting us into the family?" asked Cat.

"I don't know, Cat. Maybe when he meets the two of you, he'll come around, but until then, I don't know. I think we need to give him some time to adjust to the whole situation before we arrange a meeting though," she said, watching the three heads of her children nod around the table.

"I'm sorry that our presence is causing trouble in your marriage, Laurel," Billie said.

Laurel reached up and touched Billie's face. "You let me worry about that, Billie. Now that I've found you, I will not let anyone come between us again -- not even my husband," she said.

**********

"Mel, will you stop fidgeting and sit down! The house looks fine!" Janice scolded as Mel walked around adjusting knick knacks.

"I can't help it. I'm so nervous, I can hardly breath," Mel said, nervously flitting around the parlor, making last minute adjustments to the furniture.

Janice had had enough. Rising to her feet, she grabbed Mel and pushed her up against the wall. Leaning in, she planted a long and hard kiss on Mel's mouth, effectively stilling the woman's fidgeting. Their guests stepped into the parlor just as Janice pulled her mouth away from Mel's. Billie cleared her throat to announce their presence.

There before them, were two elderly women, the smaller one holding the taller one pinned against the wall, their body language making it painfully clear the guests had just interrupted an intimate moment. Both women were looking at them, the taller one's face flush with embarrassment, the smaller one's bearing a smug expression.

Janice felt Mel's knees begin to buckle. "Don't you dare faint on us, Melinda Pappas!" she scolded.

"Oh my!" Melinda said as she sank further down the wall.

Billie and Laurel were immediately at her sides, assisting Janice in her effort to keep Mel from sliding all the way to the floor. Book-ending Melinda, the two women led her to a chair while Janice went to stand with Cat and Dylan. Turning around, she looked at the three women and was immediately struck by the strong resemblance between them.

"Holy Shit!" Janice said.

Cat threw her arm around Jan's shoulder. "Kind of overwhelming, isn't it?" she said grinning. "By the way, Grams, this is Dylan. Laurel's son ... and your grandson. Dylan, this is Grandma Jan." Cat said, completing the introductions.

Janice turned to Dylan and put her hand out to shake his. Dylan looked at her hand and raised his eyebrows before wrapping his arms around her in a tight bear hug and lifting her off the ground, swinging her around in a circle. Putting her back on the floor, he planted a wet sloppy kiss in her cheek before letting her go. "Nice to meet you, Grams," he said, grinning ear to ear.

"Aarrgghh!" Janice said, wiping her cheek while Cat and Dylan laughed.

While Cat was introducing Dylan to Janice, Billie was making introductions of her own.

Billie knelt down on one knee in front of Mel and took her hand. Looking her in the eyes, she said, "Grams, are you all right?"

"Oh my, yes! No need to fuss over little ole me. Billie, did you bring her? Did you bring my little girl?" Mel asked, not seeing Laurel, who had moved off to the side while Billie was tending to her.

"Yes, Grams, we brought her, and your grandson too," Billie said.

"I ... I have a grandson?" she asked, not taking her eyes off Billie's face.

"Oh yeah, my little brother. He's a cutie too," Billie replied, causing Mel to smile broadly.

"Well, land sakes child, what are you waitin' for? Where are they?" Mel said impatiently.

Billie rose to her feet and extended a hand to Mel to help her out of the chair. "Grams, this is Laurel, your daughter," she said, motioning Laurel forward.

Mel looked at the vision before her. Releasing Billie's hand, she took a step forward, coming face to face with Laurel. Nearly the same height, build and coloring, they were mirror foils of each other. Both women simultaneously reached their right hands up to touch the cheek of the other. Both had tears streaming down their cheeks. They stood there, staring into each other's eyes until Mel opened her arms and Laurel fell into them.

"My baby," Mel cried. "I thought you were dead. They told me you were dead," was all Mel could say. "I'm so sorry."

Both women were crying, clinging to each other. "Mama?" Laurel said, clinging desperately to Mel.

Billie had made her way over to Cat, taking the smaller woman into her arms as they too cried at the reunion. In fact, there wasn't a dry eye in the room, with Janice and Dylan trying to inconspicuously dry their eyes, not wanting to betray their 'tough guy' images.

Cat gave Janice a shove forward and motioned for her to join her wife and daughter's reunion. Another shove had Dylan heading into the fray as well.

Billie looked at the gathering of people before her and realized that she was now on solid ground. She had found her roots. These people were her home and her family. Motioning to Cat with her head, she herded her wife out of the room and up the stairs while three generations within, reveled in the essence of family.

************************************************************************************************ EPILOGUE

The Charland and Swenson clans were gathered in Cat and Billie's back yard for a cookout to celebrate their victorious return. Seth, Tara and Skylar had stayed with Jen and Fred for the entire week that Cat and Billie were gone, and although they enjoyed staying with their friends, they were happy to have their parents back home.

Billie and Cat had returned from South Carolina two days ago after spending a few days with their extended family. The visit had gone well. Billie and Laurel had made their peace, however, only time would heal the wounds of lost memories that they would never hold in their hearts. They were exhausted, but feeling emotionally complete.

When they left, Laurel and Dylan were making plans to stay for another week, giving themselves ample time to become acquainted with their new family. The scene at the airport in Charleston when Billie and Cat left, was emotional. Laurel still had a sister, and three grandchildren to meet and made plans for her and Dylan to visit Billie and Cat in the near future. Whether or not Laurel's husband, Jim would be with them, was yet to be seen. Laurel and Jim had a lot of things to discuss and work out concerning her daughter and parents.

"Billie, could you please pass the catsup?" Cat asked as her friends and family sat around the picnic table in the back yard.

Billie passed the catsup to Jen, who passed it to Cat.

"So, this whole quest started because you were convinced you had a connection to the warrior and bard. Did you ever resolve that issue?" Jen asked.

"Actually, yes we did," Billie said. "Mel and Jan told us this wonderful story about a dig site they were on in Macedonia, Greece. In fact, it was at that very site, where they met. It seems that it held the Tomb of Ares, Greek God of War. Legend has it that the Hephestas, the Greek God of the Forge, trapped Ares in this tomb, only to be freed by a descendant of Xena. Janice found the tomb, which by the way, was the same tomb where they discovered the Xena Scrolls. Apparently, while they were excavating the site, Xena somehow inhabited Mel's body and actually had a sword fight with Ares. It turns out that Mel is Xena's descendant. While Xena was in Mel's body, she told Janice that she was a descendant of Gabrielle. So there you have it. Pure and simple," Billie explained.

"Pure and simple, huh?" Jen said. "So you think you're pretty hot stuff now, huh? I mean, a direct descendant of Xena Warrior Princess and all," Jen said.

"Oh yeah!" Billie said. "Hot stuff indeed!" she said.

"Ah, would you excuse me for one moment?" Jen said, getting up from the table.

Billie turned her attention back to her meal, talking amicably with Cat, and paying no attention to her friend, who walked away from the table with an evil smile on her face. Moments later, Billie heard Jen's voice from behind her.

"Well, Miss Hot Stuff ... time to cool down. Remember the kitchen sprayer? Paybacks are a bitch!" Jen said.

Billie turned around quickly and caught a cold spray of water from the garden hose, full in the face.

"Aarrgghh! JEN ... YOU ARE DEAD! DO YOU HEAR ME!" Billie screamed as she got up from the table and chased her friend around the yard, trying her best to dodge the spray from the hose. After a time, Billie's longer legs gave her the advantage as she managed to wrestle the hose away from Jen, soaking her to the bone.

Cat watched the antics from her nice dry spot at the table. "Ah, it feels good to be home," she said.

THE END