DISCLAIMERS:

COPYRIGHT: Xena Warrior Princess, Gabrielle, Perdicus, Toris, Cyrene, Autolycus, the Amazxons, Ephiny, and Argo are the property of MCA/Universal and are used here without permission, but for entertainment purposes only, and for no monetary gain. No copyright infringement implied or intended.

SUBTEXT: Yes, this is alternate fan fiction which is based on the premise of two women who are very much in love with each other. There is absolutely nothing graphic here... in fact I wouldn't even rate it PG-13 if it wasn't for the violence. If this type of love offends you, if you are less than 18 years old, or if love is illegal where you live, climb on board the anti-subtext train and get outta town.

VIOLENCE: This fan fiction implies, and in some cases, describes, acts of violence. This is after all, Xena, and not Nancy Drew. This story could be classified as hurt/comfort, and specifically deals with spousal abuse. If you are disturbed by this concept, you may not want to read this. If you are currently in an abusive relationship, GET OUT OF IT NOW! If you are currently recovering from one, I applaud your efforts to free yourself and you have my heartiest congratulations.

TIME LINE: This story occurs in an alternate time line, which presupposes that Gabrielle is still married to Perdicus. It also occurs prior to information revealed about Xena's childhood during "The Furries".

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is my first attempt at writing fan fiction. Please be gentle with your criticism. All flames will be flushed down the toilet. Send all feedback to warriorx@together.net.

THE MOST PRECIOUS THING

by: kd bard

Written: 10/98

CHAPTER I

Xena had been riding for most of the day, her head bent low, cloak wrapped tightly around her to ward off the biting wind. If truth be known, she welcomed the cold. It served to numb her senses, and to take her mind off the dull ache in her heart. Right now, her goal as she pushed on through the countryside, was to find shelter for herself and her horse Argo.

Xena had been traveling for many moons, with no real destination in mind. Things were so different now that she was alone. Where she once cherished the rare moments of silence, now she cursed them. The silence gave her opportunity to think.... and to remember. These were two things she definitely did not want to do. Thinking always led to tender memories, followed by the searing agony of loss. She used to welcome the silence, but not any more. Sometimes the silence was interrupted by violence, by the need to defend the innocent, or herself (which she considered far from innocent). She welcomed these times, for they disrupted the silence and gave her less time to think and remember. But not today.... No, today she dealt with her memories, along with the cold and the wind.

Soon, Xena came upon signs of civilization.... a few scattered huts here and there.... a farmer, bundled securely against the elements, trying to raise a living out of the fallow, drought-stricken land. The drought had caused severe problems this cycle, making the harvest season one of the poorest on record. Communities all around the area were struck hard.... Amphipolis, Potedia. Potedia.... The pain that word invoked tore through Xena's heart like a newly sharpened blade. Potedia..., the home of her bard. Her Bard? Did she really have the right to think that way about her any more? Surely not. Damn the silence.

Xena thought back to that day six moons ago, when Gabrielle's childhood sweetheart, Perdicus appeared in their camp. She and Gabrielle had been traveling together for nearly a year by then. Each day that passed, saw her love for the bard increase beyond her wildest imagination. It was true that in the beginning, she didn't want the bard to follow her. She was annoying to say the least.... she never seemed to shut up! Xena tried her damnedest to discourage her. But, Gabrielle would not be dissuaded. Instead, she wormed her way into Xena's life and into her heart - becoming as important to her, as the air she breathed.

Xena cherished this friendship beyond everything else, but lived in fear that someday, the bard would tire of their travels and leave her. It was this fear of losing Gabrielle that prevented Xena from telling the bard how she really felt about her... that for her, their friendship had developed into something far beyond sisterly affection.... that she not only loved her, but was in love with her. Gabrielle was, after all, just an innocent country girl. Xena had no way of knowing if Gabrielle even knew that women could love each other that way. She was convinced that a declaration of carnal love would surely scare the girl away. So, she did the only thing she could think of to retain the bard's friendship.... she suffered her love in silence. In the end, it was just that silence that caused her to lose Gabrielle.

Perdicus arrived in their camp in the middle of the night, distraught with self-loathing for the lives he had taken in battle. Falling to one knee, he proclaimed his undying love for Gabrielle and proposed marriage. He told Gabrielle that he needed her.... that he couldn't live without her.... that it was the vision of her face that had prevented him from taking his own life on the battlefield. He touched her heart where she was most vulnerable... her need to be needed. Xena could see that now.

Why had she been so blind before? She needed Gabrielle too! Why did her pride and warrior stoicism prevent her from showing it? Why had she allowed this farm boy-turned-soldier to come in and sweep Gabrielle away from her? "I'll tell you why," she told herself... "Because she deserves better than you. She deserves to have a home and children. She'll never have that with you. All you can give her is a life of traveling.... never knowing when we'll have a roof over our heads or food in our stomachs! Never knowing if injury or death will result from an encounter with raiders, murders or thieves! No Xena, she's better off where she is!"

Xena envisioned her bard, heavy with child by now, sitting contentedly in front of the fireplace with her husband at her side, discussing plans for their future. As much as it tore her apart, Xena knew she could not stand in the way of Gabrielle's happiness. "Damn, I miss her!", she agonized out loud.

About a half candlemark later, Xena drew Argo up to the front of the inn. She had only a vague idea what town she was in, but she didn't really care. All she was looking for right now, was warmth, and maybe a little companionship to take her mind off her breaking heart. She hadn't been with anyone sexually since Hercules..., since Gabrielle came into her life, but this overwhelming loneliness was more than she could bear. Maybe a little physical comfort would help ease the pain.

She entered the inn and looked around. It was pretty typical as far as inns went. The tables were worn, and the air was stale with the smell of mead and sweaty bodies, indicating to Xena, that this was a refuge for the more undesirable element of the population. This was the type of place she would often frequent in her warlord days. But she didn't care.... as long as she could get a warm bed and a somewhat decent meal. Not that it mattered to her if she ate or not.... she didn't have much of an appetite these days. In fact, over the last six moons, she had been eating just barely enough to fuel her body. Her weight loss and loose fitting leathers were testaments to that fact.

Xena rented a room and then went to take care of Argo. When she returned to the inn, she went directly to the back of the dining area and selected a table that would afford her a view of the whole tavern. It was an old habit of hers.... choosing such a strategically position allowed her to ward off attacks, as they would all have to come from in front of her. She dropped the saddle bags on the floor next to the table and sat down heavily, leaning back in the chair and placing her right leg up on the table. She struck a no-nonsense pose that sent the message loud and clear to the other patrons, that she was to be left alone.

Xena's mind soon began to wander. "I wonder what Gabrielle is doing right now?", she mused. "Probably cleaning up the supper dishes", she thought as she pictured Gabrielle settling into a safe, routine, domestic lifestyle. Xena often felt guilty that her life with Gabrielle afforded little domestication. Someone as good and pure as Gabrielle deserved an easy life, with a warm roof over her head, a larder full of food and a partner who treated her like the queen she was. These are the things she wished she could give her, but her past would not allow it. No, there would always be wrongs to atone for, and evil warlords, bent on revenge, that would constantly put their lives in danger. How could she possibly give Gabrielle the stability she deserved with so many strikes against her?

Still, Xena couldn't help but think how life would be settling down with Gabrielle. She had often thought about returning to Amphipolis to live. She could build a cabin for herself and Gabrielle near her mother's inn. There was always plenty of work she could do there to help out, or she could raise and train horses, and maybe bring some much-needed trade back to the town. Gabrielle could earn dinars by telling stories at the inn. She didn't think her mother would mind having a bard-in-residence to help bring in customers. "Yes, we could be happy there", Xena thought. "If it wasn't for my past...., I could give Gabrielle everything. We'd even find a way to have children if she wanted them, after all, I have many skills."

Xena's mind soon returned to reality. "You're too late, warrior", she reminded herself. "She's out of reach now.... married.... settled down, safe and secure. She doesn't need you anymore - not that she ever did." Xena could feel the tears pooling in her eyes.

Xena reached up and wiped the corners of her eyes, looking around to be sure her distress wasn't obvious to the other patrons. "Get a grip on yourself, Xena", she scolded. "She isn't like that. You were her friend and nothing else. She would probably be shocked and disgusted that you could even have these kinds of thoughts about her. She likes men.... the gods know, she mooned over enough of them during the last year of your travels together!"

Xena's musings were soon interrupted by a young barmaid who approached her table. Xena was so absorbed in her thoughts, that she didn't acknowledge her until the maid reached down and touched her arm. Startled, Xena instinctively leapt to her feet, drawing her sword as she went. She grabbed the barmaid and slammed her down onto the table, pressing the tip of her sword between the girl's breasts with just enough pressure to slightly scratch the skin. The girl stared up at Xena, with wide-eyed terror on her face. Xena calmed down, then slowly leaned over the barmaid until her lips were a hair's breath away from her ear.

"Do that again, and those lovely breasts of yours will suffer much more than a scratch!", she hissed into the girl's ear. "Never approach a warrior unaware.... Your life could be forfeit for the act!"

With that warning, Xena slowly raised herself up off the breathless girl and released her, sheathing her sword.

The girl laid there for a moment longer, a red flush creeping across her features. Xena looked closely at her face, but couldn't decide if it was embarrassment or desire that was causing the flush. "This may be just what I need to warm by bed tonight", she thought to herself. Xena held out a hand to the girl to help her off the table.

"What's your name? Xena asked, returning to her seat.

"Fiona", said the girl. "I'm sorry I startled you.... I assure you it won't happen again."

She blushed once more. Fiona turned her face away from the warrior so as to not betray her emotions.

"See that it doesn't." warned Xena. "What is the kitchen offering tonight?"

"Roast pork and red potatoes", the barmaid replied.

Xena couldn't help but think that Gabrielle's mouth would be watering just about now, had she been there. "Stop it, Xena!" She chided herself. "She's got a stable life now.... be happy for her and get on with your own!" Xena shook off the offending thoughts and turned her attention back to the barmaid. She noticed for the fist time that the barmaid resembled Gabrielle.... right down to the reddish-blonde hair. "Yes, I think this is just the diversion I need tonight", she thought.

Xena ordered the pork, along with some ale, and then settled back to wait for her food. While she was waiting, she watched Fiona move among the customers, hips swaying, hair thrown casually over her shoulder. She would unconsciously touch a customer's arm, or smile sweetly while taking an order.... Oh, so much like her Gabrielle. Yes, Xena was looking forward to the night they would spend together, gently building her passions to peak levels, making the girl cry out her name at the height of release. For this night, Xena would allow herself to dream.... dream that she was making love to her bard, if only in her mind.

Her dinner arrived quickly. Fiona placed the platter of food in front of her and "accidentally" brushed her hand along Xena's arm as she released it. Xena caught the coy look the barmaid gave her as their eyes met over the contact. "I can see I won't have to spend much time persuading this one to join me tonight." With that thought in mind, Xena ate her meal. When she was done, she pushed the empty plate away from her and waited for the barmaid to return. She didn't have long to wait.

Fiona approached Xena's table with determination. She could see the interest in the warrior's eyes, and she decided that she wasn't going to miss out on the opportunity to feel the warrior's desire this night.... and if she was lucky, make a dinar or two to boot.

"Is there anything else I can do for you, Warrior?" she asked innocently.

"I can think of several things you can do for me." Xena eyed her suggestively.

"My shift ends in about a half candlemark.... Is that all right?" the barmaid asked with her eyes downcast and a slight flush on her cheeks.

"I can wait." Xena replied.

Fiona brought a second mug of ale over to Xena who graciously accepted it and sat back to wait for the maid's shift to end.

A half candlemark later, Fiona and Xena were heading to the stairs leading to Xena's room, Xena's saddle bags flung carelessly over her shoulder.

"Xena!", a voice rang loudly from the front door of the inn. "Thank the gods you're here. I've been looking from here to Tautarus and back for you!"

Irritated at the interruption, Xena turned toward the voice and graced the unfortunate intruder with one of her "looks". The intruder approached her from across the room, pushing the hood of his cloak off his head as he neared.

"Autolycus!" Xena said. "This had better be good!" she warned him.

"Xena, I need to talk to you.... in private." he added as he eyed the girl waiting for Xena on the stairs.

Xena sighed with frustration. "Autolycus - this is NOT a good time. Come back in the morning - we'll talk then."

Xena grabbed the barmaid's arm and headed up the stairs again.

"Xena, wait!. Its about Gabrielle!" Autolycus knew this would get her attention.

Xena stopped her ascent abruptly, turned, and came back down the stairs. She grabbed a handful of Autolycus' shirt front and pulled his face close to her's.

"What about Gabrielle?" she said in her most intimidating voice.

"Now, now, Xena, there's no need for violence." Autolycus whimpered. "Easy on the shirt. Can't have the King of Thieves running around with torn clothing now, can we? After all, I have a reputation to maintain!"

"I don't have time for this Autolycus." She released the front of his shirt and gently pushed him backwards. "Come back in the morning." Again, she turned to follow the barmaid back up the stairs.

Seeing that he was losing her, Autolycus suddenly blurted out, "Xena.... He's beating her!"

Xena froze.

She turned back to Autolycus, the fire of Hades raging in her eyes. Grabbing his shirt front again, she shook him violently.

"You have exactly 10 seconds to tell me what you know, or by the gods, I will kill you." she said.

"Okay, okay. Let's take a seat and I'll tell you". Autolycus knew he had to calm her down before he told her the whole story, or he was bound for Tautarus.

Without releasing the hold on Autolycus' shirt, or breaking eye contact with him, Xena reached down into her coin bag and produced a dinar, which she pressed into Fiona's hand.

"I guess I won't be needing your services tonight after all." she said.

Fiona looked at the dinar, shrugged her shoulders and walked away.

Xena dragged Autolycus over to the table she had just vacated and slammed him down into a chair. She remained standing, leaning over the table at him.

"Talk!" She demanded.

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CHAPTER II

Autolycus took a few moments to compose himself. Gods, how he hated being the bearer of this news. He knew Xena and Gabrielle had split, but he also knew that the warrior was deeply in love with the bard. She never admitted it to him, but he prided himself on his keen sense of observation, and he was convinced of their love without a doubt. Xena's current physical condition, with her weight loss, dull, untamed hair, and dark circles under her eyes, spoke volumes about what the separation was doing to her. He turned to the warrior and hoped that when she heard what he had to say, she wouldn't take her anger out on him.

"Xena, you have to promise that you won't kill the messenger, okay?" he pleaded.

Slamming her hands down on the table, and leaning even further over him, she warned, "Autolycus, dying is going to look real good to you compared to what I'll make you suffer, if you don't spill it right now!".

That's all the encouragement he needed. He started by telling her that he had been in Thessaly, and was passing close to Potedia. Since he was near by, he decided to stop in and pay a visit to his good friend, Gabrielle. As he entered the town, he noticed that it was a pretty dull and boring place.... not at all the type of village he could picture Gabrielle living in. He entered the inn and asked for directions to Gabrielle's house.

Xena paced back and forth while Autolycus told his story.

"I approached the barkeep and asked about Gabrielle, and curiously enough, I was met with hostility. The barkeep began sputtering about how I was one of those friends from her past, and that she didn't need reminders of that life around her anymore. This is where it gets weird, Xena. He started to say how 'that woman', I assumed he meant you, corrupted Gabrielle, and that her husband had a heck of a time 'straightening her out'. Now he had me really worried. After threatening him with bodily harm, he finally gave me directions to Gabrielle's house."

Autolycus took a break and sipped the port the barmaid had brought to their table for him. Xena was still pacing like a caged animal.

"Anyway," Autolycus continued, "I followed the directions I was given and I started to wonder if the barkeep had led me on a wild goose chase. You see, Xena, the house he directed me to, was more like a rundown shack or hut. Xena, Gabrielle is living in poverty! It broke my heart to see it!"

Xena stopped pacing and clenched her fists together into tight balls. "Go on, Autolycus," she said.

"Well, I went up to the door and knocked, but no one answered. I was beginning to think that the place was empty, so I turned around and started walking away. Then suddenly, the door opened just a sliver, and I saw the unmistakable green of Gabrielle's eyes."

Xena closed her own eyes and recalled the beautiful emerald green that she missed looking at so much.

Seeing the wistful look on Xena's face, Autolycus continued.

"Like I said, they were Gabrielle's eyes all right. She was peeking out the door, and when she recognized me, she just closed her eyes tightly and then opened them again to let tears fall down her cheeks."

Xena was pacing again. Autolycus could feel the pent-up anger radiating from her. He continued with his story.

"I reached forward and pushed the door open wider. There before me, stood Gabrielle. Xena, I almost didn't recognize her! Her hair was matted, she was as thin as a reed and she wore clothes that were little more than rags. The worst part though, were the bruises that covered almost every bit of exposed skin!"

Autolycus stopped, catching is breath and trying to compose himself before continuing. Xena stopped directly behind him, her breath coming in short, angry pants.

"Xena, I tried to get her out of there." he said, turning around to look at her. "I grabbed her wrist and started dragging her through the door. All of the sudden, we heard her husband coming in the back entrance. He was screaming at her, calling her a whore and a bitch, and threatening to beat her to within an inch of her life. Gabrielle just lost it. She freaked out! Xena, I have never seen such terror in anyone's eyes before. She pleaded with me to leave before Perdicus saw me. She said it would be worse if he thought she had a man in the house while he was gone. She begged me to go. She refused to come with me, Xena!. She pushed me out the door and slammed it, but not before he saw me. He came charging out of the house, dragging Gabrielle behind him by the hair. He threw Gabrielle down on the ground at my feet and kicked her hard in the stomach. I tried to stop him, Xena, truly I did. I lunged at him, but he drew a dagger and held it to Gabrielle's throat. He warned me, that if I, or any of Gabrielle's friends showed our faces at their door again, he would kill her. I was powerless, Xena. I had to leave her there.... I'm sorry."

Autolycus stopped and dropped his head into his hands, his emotions winning out over his determination not to cry.

Xena walked over to the empty chair beside Autolycus and let herself drop wearily into it. Placing a hand on his shoulder, she said, "You did what you could Autolycus. Thank you for telling me. I will take care of this."

Giving Autolycus the room she had rented for the night, Xena collected her saddle bags from the floor and headed to the stable. Soon, she and Argo were on a dead run for Potedia.

Having left just after dinner, Xena knew she wouldn't get far before darkness fell, so she started looking for a place to set up camp. She found a secluded spot, not too far off the main road, near a stream, where she could bed down for a few hours, and give Argo some much needed rest and water. She quickly set up camp, forgoing a cook fire, since she didn't feel much like eating. Stretching out on her bedroll, she tried to sleep, but visions of a battered and bruised Gabrielle kept invading her mind. She spent the next several hours battling the tears that flowed freely down her cheeks as she sat with her arms wrapped tightly around her knees, rocking back and forth, chanting Gabrielle's name over and over. A couple of hours before daybreak, she fell into an exhausted slumber.

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CHAPTER III

Just before dawn, Xena awoke, packed up camp, and was on her way. The terrible rage that had started back at the inn during the telling of Autolycus' story, rapidly grew, until it consumed her entire being. She spent the hours on horseback, thinking of ways to show Perdicus the same terror that he had so freely wrought upon Gabrielle.

Self-loathing followed. "It's all my fault" she thought. "If I had just told her how I felt, maybe she wouldn't have gone off with him in the first place. I practically threw her at him! She must be feeling horribly betrayed right now. Gabrielle, I'm so sorry. I love you so much. That bastard will pay for what he's done to you - I promise!"

Xena rode on through the day, mindless of the cold that whipped her hair into a frenzy, and froze the tears that were falling freely down her face. Soon, she came upon the outskirts of Potedia. By this time, Xena was frantic. It had been four days since Autolycus left her with a raging Perdicus. She only hopped that she wasn't too late.

Xena pushed Argo as hard as she dared, silently vowing that she'd make it up to her faithful mount later. Argo seemed to sense her mistress' urgency as she forged on. Soon, Xena brought Argo to an abrupt halt in front of the inn. Before the mare came to a complete stop, Xena was on the ground and heading for the entrance. She kicked the door in and barged directly up to the barkeep.

Grabbing him by the throat and lifting him up over bar, she spat into his face, "I don't want any shit from you, Got it?! Give me directions to Gabrielle's home NOW, or I'll kill you where you stand!'

The barkeep quickly gave the warrior the directions and was rewarded with the release of his windpipe.

Xena ran back to Argo, mounted, and was off on a dead run in the direction she was given. A quarter candlemark later, she was kicking in the door to the ramshackle hut. She was met with a cold, empty room, and dying embers in the fireplace.

There was no sign of Gabrielle anywhere. She searched frantically through each room twice, and all around the perimeter of the property, including the barn and woodshed, calling Gabrielle name out loudly as she searched. Xena prayed to any god that would listen, to help her find her soul mate. Finally, after nearly a candlemark of searching, she gave up hope.

Falling to her knees in the middle of the bedroom, Xena cried out, "Damn you Perdicus! You bastard! If she is dead, you will not be far behind. Your ass will rot in Tautarus for this!" She dropped her head into her hands and sobbed openly for her missing love.

Suddenly, Xena heard a faint noise from the far corner of the bedroom. She drew her sword and crept cautiously towards what appeared to be a pile of blankets and rags. She heard the noise again. This time, she was certain she had heard her name, called out in barely a whisper.

"Xena! Xena, help me, please!"

Dropping her sword, Xena quickly dove into the pile of rags, throwing them off in all directions. Buried beneath, was the battered body of Gabrielle.

"Gabrielle!" Xena cried, her voice breaking.

Xena carefully pulled the bard toward her and enveloped her securely in her arms, trying to be careful not to cause her any more pain. Gabrielle whimpered in spite of her best efforts to be brave.

"Xena, you came!"

"Yes, my bard, I'm here. You're safe now. It's okay, I've got you.... I've got you." Xena held her close, rocking her back and forth, placing light kisses on her forehead and comforting her the best way she knew how.

Gabrielle had never felt so safe, held tightly in the warrior's arms. She buried herself deeply into Xena's shoulder and held onto Xena's arm with an iron grip.

Soon, Gabrielle calmed down and looked into Xena's face. The fear that Xena saw there tore her heart from her chest and sent her on an emotional roller coaster into her past. She quickly pushed the memory aside to be dealt with later.

As she held her, Xena looked around the room to find a more comfortable place to lay the bard while she examined her for injuries. The bedroom had obviously been ransacked and trashed - probably by Perdicus. Finding no place suitable, Xena gently lowered the bard to the floor, and after promising to come right back, went into the living room to rekindle the dying embers into a warm raging fire. She then laid out several sleeping furs on the rug in front of the fire, and went to retrieve Gabrielle.

Carefully, she lifted Gabrielle up into her arms, carried her to the fire, and gently laid her down on the furs. Once Gabrielle was settled in as comfortably as possible, Xena began to examine her closely for injuries. What she found, made her sick with rage.

Gabrielle's face was so bruised that one eye was swollen completely shut and her lip was split open and bleeding. She stripped her of the rags she had been wearing, cringing visibly with each new bruise that was exposed as she removed the clothing. Her stomach knotted tightly when she saw what appeared to be welt marks across her back - probably put there by a wide leather strap or belt. Xena had a difficult time seeing through the wall of tears that continuously escaped her eyes.

"Gabrielle, I'm so sorry. This is all my fault!" Xena wailed as she finished removing the rags from Gabrielle's body.

"No Xena! I won't let you take the blame for this." Gabrielle said in whispered tones, her voice scratchy from thirst. "This is NOT your fault - it's mine. I walked into this with my eyes open".

She took a ragged breath through the pain.

"I knew Perdicus had a mean streak - he used to be cruel to small animals when we were children. I just didn't think he would turn it on me." Gabrielle was exhausted and quite upset after her little speech.

Seeing her exhausted state, Xena urged Gabrielle to calm down.

"Gabrielle, Don't try to talk right now - save your energy. You can tell me all about it later, okay? I need to check out your injuries. I'll try not to hurt you, Love."

"Love?" Gabrielle thought. "Did I hear that right?"

"I'll be right back, Gabrielle." Xena said, rising to her feet. "I need to get the healer's kit from Argo's saddle bags."

Xena ran out to Argo and rummaged through the saddle bags until she found what she was looking for. Before returning to Gabrielle, she grabbed the water skin that was hanging from the saddle horn.

"Here," Xena said, kneeling and holding the water skin to Gabrielle's lips. "Drink this.... it will help you regain some of your strength."

Gabrielle drank thirstily.

Xena spent the next candlemark examining Gabrielle for injuries. As she uncovered and treated each one, her rage grew until she was ready to kill Perdicus on sight.

"How bad is it, Xena?" Gabrielle asked. ".... and I want the truth."

"Its bad, Gabrielle. From what I can tell, you have a concussion, a broken right arm, several broken ribs, a deep gash on your thigh that will need stitches, and a sprained ankle. I also see signs of bleeding inside your gut, which could be very dangerous."

Xena paused to regain her composure, failing miserably, she ran her hand through her hair and continued, her voice cracking, "By the gods, Gabrielle, there are whip marks across your back, and you're bruised everywhere!"

Another pause.... Xena cleared her throat to continue, "You'll need to see a healer as soon as I treat the more serious injuries enough to move you."

Xena made the bard as comfortable as possible, then stood up and paced back and forth in front of the fire, her barely controlled anger showing through. Xena was doing her best to get her emotions under control - at least for now. Gabrielle needed her, but with her rage boiling the way it was, she would be useless. Xena focused all her energy into calming herself down, and soon had her rage under control enough to care for the bard.

Xena returned to the sleeping furs where Gabrielle was laying, obviously in tremendous pain. Xena brushed away an errant lock of red-blonde hair from Gabrielle's forehead and spoke to her in a soothing voice.

"Gabrielle", she said. "I'll have to set your arm, stitch your leg, and bind your ribs before I can move you. They are the most painful injuries that I can see. I am really concerned over the internal bleeding, but I won't be able to do anything about that until I get you to the healer, okay?".

Gabrielle nodded her head, yes.

"Also, with that head injury, you shouldn't sleep right away, so while I'm tending your wounds, I want you to tell me what has been happening here for the last six moons."

"Xena, I really don't want to talk about it right now." she replied.

"Look Gabrielle, I know this is unpleasant, but it will help me to better understand and treat some of your injuries." "Especially those I can't see." she thought to herself.

"Okay, okay." She paused to take a deep breath - wincing as pain shot through her injured ribs. "When Perdicus and I first got married, things were fine. He was attentive and sweet for the most part."

Xena didn't miss the reference to "for the most part".

"About two months after the wedding, Perdicus' father was getting ready to bring in the harvest. Of course, Perdicus and I both went into the fields to help out. Cutting the wheat by hand was grueling work, but we were making pretty good progress until the wind storm hit."

Gabrielle paused, a memory obviously causing her mental distress.

"Xena, I have never seen such an intense and terrifying storm as the one that raged through here that day. It leveled all the crops for miles around, setting the town and the merchants into a panic. It was almost as if the gods were behind it."

Xena interrupted her... "Gabrielle, I need you to steady your arm for a moment. The larger bone in your forearm is broken and I have to set it. I'm going to use pressure points to relieve the pain while I do this, but it will hurt like Hades when I release it. Do you understand?"

Gabrielle nodded.

Xena pinched two pressure points in Gabrielle's neck, which deadened the pain in her arm. After locating two flat pieces of wood and some torn sheets she could use for bindings, Xena braced her foot against Gabrielle's shoulder while she pulled and aligned the arm bones. Once set, Gabrielle held the wood in place while Xena bound the linen strips around it.

"Okay, Gabrielle. I have to release these pressure points. You know it will hurt. Are you ready?"

Gabrielle shook her head, yes, even though she was scared out of her mind.

Xena released the pressure points and then held the bard as she cried out from the pain. Tears flowed freely from the bard's eyes. After a few minutes, the pain subsided to a dull ache.

As Xena prepared to stitch the gash on her leg, she said, "Go on with your story, Gabrielle."

Gabrielle wiped the remaining tears from her cheeks and continued.

"Like I was saying, Xena," Gabrielle continued, "The storm pretty much wiped out the winter food supply, so everyone was in a panic. The town elders held a meeting, which women are normally not allowed to attend, but seeing that my father-in-law was one of the elders, I was able to get away with being there. I sat there and listed for two candlemarks about how the town was going to starve to death over the winter, and about how they were cursed by the gods. I got pretty sick of it and finally stood up and suggested that the people of the town pool their resources together into a type of town stores, which could be rationed out over the winter. Food would still be scarce, but at least no one would starve to death. I couldn't believe the silence that fell over the room, Xena. I had broken the unwritten Potedian law that women were only to be seen but never heard."

She paused for a moment. "Xena, my head is killing me.... I really just want to lay down here for a while."

Xena sensed that Gabrielle was approaching the most painful part of her story and was avoiding the recounting of it.

"No Gabrielle." Xena said. "You'll just fall asleep, and with that concussion, you need to stay awake for a while. Now be a good little bard and finish your story."

"Oh, all right." groaned Gabrielle. "So, I embarrassed Perdicus by speaking my mind in front of the council. He was furious with me. He dragged me out of the council and all the way home. He accused me of making him look like a fool".

Gabrielle looked away from Xena and down at the sleeping furs, obviously too ashamed to make eye contact with the warrior.

"That day was the first time he ever hit me, Xena. It pretty much went downhill from there. The beatings became more frequent - almost daily.... and he didn't seem to need a reason for it after a while. He started drinking away what little money we had, and he let the house fall apart. Soon, I was a prisoner in my own home - I wasn't allowed to go anywhere or see anyone".

She paused to wipe the tears from her face. Taking another painful breath, she continued.

"Autolycus' visit a few days ago pushed Perdicus over the edge. The barkeep at the inn is also the town gossip. It didn't take him long to spread among the locals, that I was having an affair with one of my former lovers. Perdicus exploded when he heard the gossip and he rushed home to see me push Autolycus out the door. Of course he thought we had already - you know.... had our little roll in the sack, and that I was urging him to leave before we got caught. He did this to me as punishment," she said waving her uninjured arm over her body.

She paused while silent sobs racked her battered body.

Xena paused in her stitching to wipe the tears from Gabrielle's eyes. She gently lifted Gabrielle's chin with her fingers and looked straight into those green pools. The fear and sorrow she saw there tore her insides out.

In a shaky, tearful voice, Gabrielle asked her, " Xena... when will it end?"

"It ends here Gabrielle. If that bastard ever lays a hand on you again, he'll have me to answer to." she replied.

Xena completed her stitching and applied salve and a bandage to the wound. Looking Gabrielle over carefully, she suddenly noticed that most of her injuries were along her right side. She pointed that fact out to Gabrielle and asked her why that was.

Gabrielle took a moment to recall the events that could have resulted in the injuries down her right side. Suddenly, she remembered and a look of sheer panic crossed her faced. Xena noticed this and took Gabrielle's hand in her own to provide comfort.

"It's okay, Gabrielle, you can tell me." Xena coaxed.

Reclaiming control of her emotions, Gabrielle recounted the injuries.

"During the argument over Autolycus, Perdicus picked me up over his head and threw me into the fireplace. I remember hitting the stones on my right side. Everything after that is a blur until I heard you calling out to me."

"He threw you into the fireplace?!" Xena yelled angrily.

Xena was on her feet now, pacing back and forth in a blind rage, her voice raising an octave with each word she spoke.

"Gabrielle, tell me where he is. I'm going to kill him!" she raged.

"Xena, Please...., It wasn't his fault. I should have kept my mouth shut. I shouldn't have let Autolycus into the house. Xena, I asked for it by disobeying him!" Gabrielle wailed.

Xena turned sharply towards Gabrielle. Falling to her knees in front of the injured woman, she grabbed Gabrielle's shoulders and looked directly into her tear filled eyes.

"Asked for it? Gabrielle, NO ONE ASKS FOR THIS KIND OF BEATING! What in Hades realm was he thinking when he did this to you?"

"Xena, we had been fighting for days over Autolycus' visit. He accused me of everything from sleeping with him, to wanting to sleep with you!" (This got a raised eyebrow from Xena).

"If she only knew how close to reality that last accusation was!" Gabrielle thought.

Gabrielle continued, "By the time he did this to me, he was fueled by the town gossip, by his own hurt sense of dignity and pride, and by what he saw as damage to his reputation. Top that all off with three days of fighting, and what you get is a battered wife."

As Xena folded Gabrielle into her arms, Gabrielle closed her eyes and reflected on the shattered mess her life had become. She looked up at Xena and sighed, "Xena, why do men have to hit?"

Xena's resolve to kill Perdicus was weakening under Gabrielle's vulnerability. Calming down, she gently laid Gabrielle back onto the furs and placed one hand to the side of the bard's face. She took a deep breath before answering.

"Not all men hit, Gabrielle.... just the ones who are not man enough to see women as equals and are Hades-bent on proving it."

Xena reached for the long strips of linen she had torn from a discarded sheet.

"Here, let me help you to sit up a bit so I can wrap your ribs." she said.

Xena helped Gabrielle into a sitting position where she tightly wrapped linen strips around her rib cage. It was obviously uncomfortable, but trying to make the trip to Amphipolis, on Argo, without the bindings, would cause excruciating pain.

"There - all done." Xena said as she lightly patted the bindings. "Lie back here now and rest while I get Argo ready for the trip home, okay?"

"Okay Xena.... and Xena?" Gabrielle asked.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you. I knew you would come."

Xena quickly swallowed the lump in her throat and wiped the tears from her eyes as she pulled the sleeping furs up and tucked them around Gabrielle to keep her warm while she readied Argo. She bent down and placed a light kiss on Gabrielle's forehead before seeing to the horse.

While preparing Argo for the journey back, Xena decided to remove her breastplate so that Gabrielle wouldn't have to lean back into the unyielding metal on the ride home. She attached the armor to the saddle then returned to Gabrielle.

The first thing Gabrielle noticed when Xena returned, was her missing armor. The second thing she noticed was the loose fitting leathers.

"Xena!" Gabrielle cried out angrily. "By the gods, what have you been doing to yourself? You aren't eating are you?"

Gabrielle didn't give Xena a chance to respond before she continued her tirade.

"Damn it, Xena, you leathers are falling off you! I'll bet you haven't been sleeping well either, have you?"

Xena considered lying to her, but knew the bard would see right through the lies. "Hera's tits!" she thought, "I should have known she would notice the weight loss.... just like her to think of me, while she is lying there half dead!"

"Gabrielle, my health is not important right now - yours is. Now I need to get you onto Argo for the ride to Amphipolis. I'll try to be as gentle as possible."

"Don't think that you've heard the last of this, Warrior Princess. You're not getting off that easy!" Gabrielle warned.

"I'm counting on it, my bard... I'm counting on it." Xena replied, trying to lighten the mood.

Xena bundled Gabrielle up in a thick cloak, carried her out, placed her on the mare's back, then climbed up into the saddle behind her, securely wrapping her arms around the bard to keep her from falling off.

"Xena, Tell me again where we're going.", the bard said faintly. She was obviously in a lot of pain from the jostling around, and Xena was more than a little concerned about her lack of short-term memory.

"Amphipolis", Xena replied. "We'll stay at the inn with my mother until you're well enough to decide what you want to do."

"What I want to do?" Gabrielle thought. "Xena, I want to be with you - can't you see that?"

Gabrielle voiced a painful "Ugh" when Argo started with a slight jolt towards Amphipolis.

************************************************************************************************

CHAPTER IV

"Thank the gods that Amphipolis is so close, Gabrielle." Xena said to the half-conscious bard. The rocking motion on top of Argo was enough to lull the bard into a slight slumber, despite her injuries. "We'll be home by nightfall."

Xena periodically talked to Gabrielle, demanding a response from the groggy bard, just to keep her awake. This much talking was too much for the warrior. She was used to listening to Gabrielle's non-stop chatter, only having to respond in mono-syllabic grunts to indicate her interest in the conversation.

It felt good to be riding with Gabrielle again. Gabrielle didn't agree to ride often, but when she did ride, it gave Xena the excuse to be physically close to the bard without giving her true emotions away. Gabrielle usually rode in the saddle behind her, with her arms wrapped tightly around Xena's waist and her head resting between the warrior's shoulder blades. Oh, how she relished the feel of the bard pressed up against her like that... arms wrapped around her and thighs pressed together. Sometimes, she would find herself leaning back into the bard, subconsciously craving closer contact. And then there were times when, invariably, the bard would fall asleep against her, using her as Xena, Warrior Pillow. It amazed Xena just how easily she could do that. Sometimes, Gabrielle would ride in front of her in the saddle. This gave Xena the chance to hold her close, wrapping her own arms around the bard and snuggling her nose deep into the bard's fragrant hair. The bard was riding in front today.... not out of the desire to be close, but out of necessity, to ensure her safety and to minimize the impact of the jarring ride on her injuries.

True to her word, the pair reached the fields surrounding Amphipolis around dinner time. Xena looked down and realized the bard was dozing again.

"Wake up, Gabrielle. We're almost home." she said as she prodded the bard awake.

A short time later, Xena pulled Argo to a stop in front of the inn and slid out of the saddle, grabbing the saddlebags and gently easing the bard down with her. Gabrielle let her head rest on Xena's shoulder.

She pushed the door open with her hip and carried the injured bard into the tavern. Xena's mother, Cyrene hurried over to them with concern written plainly on her face.

"By the gods, Xena!" Cyrene cried. "What has happened to the poor child?"

"I need a room, Mother. I'll explain everything after I get her settled in a comfortable bed."

Cyrene led Xena to her childhood room and held the door open for her to enter with the bard. After laying Gabrielle down gently on the bed, she rummaged through her saddle bags and retrieved a small pouch of mixed herbs, which she handed over to her mother.

"Mother, please brew these into a tea for Gabrielle. They'll help the healing process." she said. "And send Toris for the healer. She has some internal bleeding that needs treating... Oh, and Mother, ask Toris to stable and brush Argo for me."

"Right away, Xena. I'll also bring you some dinner. It looks like both of you could use the nourishment." With that, Cyrene left to brew the tea and to send Toris on his errands.

While Cyrene was gone, Xena unwrapped Gabrielle from the cloak. "By the gods, Gabrielle, you're a mess. You're concerned about my health, but you're so thin yourself, I can count your ribs. What has that bastard been doing to you?" she seethed to herself, as she removed the cloak from around the bard.

Seeing the extent of Gabrielle's injuries in full light rather than in the dim light of her hut, sent a fresh shockwave of hurt and rage through her. There were several injuries that still needed treating. Xena had only treated the ones that would have made traveling unbearable for the bard, intending on helping the healer finish the job when they arrived at the inn.

Removing the cloak, she settled Gabrielle comfortably under the covers. As Xena was tucking the covers in around the bard, she came face to face with those emerald green eyes staring at her. "If she only knew what those eyes do to me." Xena thought.

"Hi!", Xena said.

"Hi yourself!" Replied the bard, trying to smile through the pain. "Where are we?"

"We're at Mother's inn in Amphipolis. How are you feeling?"

"Like I've been run over by a herd of wild horses." she said.

"Close". Xena's smile didn't quite reach her eyes.

"Mother is brewing some tea. It will help with the pain and swelling.... and Toris has gone for the healer. When she gets here, we'll have you fixed up in no time."

No sooner had Xena finished saying this, then the door to the room was nudged open. Cyrene entered, laden with a tray of meats, breads and cheeses, a wine skin, and the tea. She walked to the bard's bedside and set the tray on the table there. Cyrene walked over to Gabrielle, kissed her on the forehead, then turned to address Xena.

"The healer should be here soon, little one. I'll be in the kitchen. If you need anything else, give a yell, okay?" she said as she turned to leave them alone.

Cyrene sensed that her daughter and the bard needed time alone to discuss this latest turn of events. Gabrielle was so good for her stoic daughter. She had seen so many positive changes in Xena over the past year, and she was sure the bard had everything to do with it. When the bard left to marry that man, Xena retreated back into herself, but through some miracle, managed to remain true to her mission of helping those in need rather than returning to her warlord ways.

Cyrene had been happily aware of the special relationship between the bard and her daughter for some time now - even if they weren't acknowledging it to themselves, or to each other. As for the present state of things, Cyrene wasn't completely sure what had happened here.... she had a good idea, but now wasn't the time to ask questions. She would hear the story later from Xena once the bard was asleep.

When Cyrene left, Xena looked uncomfortably at the bard. Sensitive chats were not her specialty, but she knew Gabrielle needed to vent her feelings.

"Wanna talk about it?" she asked Gabrielle as she sat on the edge of the bed and handed her a cup of the healing tea. The platter of food would wait until the healer had looked at those internal injuries.

Silence hung thickly in the air as Gabrielle finished her tea, and then dropped her chin to her chest. She said in a small voice, "Xena, I don't understand why he hurt me!" The tears coursed down her face. "I tried to be a good wife. He said he needed me... I did everything he told me to do.... I gave up storytelling... I wore those awful clothes. Xena, he even prevented me from contacting the Amazons. Ephiny must be out of her mind with worry by now!"

She reached up to wipe the tears from her eyes before she continued.

"I was good to him. I made his meals on time, I cleaned the house, I never refused his physical needs, I did everything a good wife would do. I don't... know... why... he... hated... me... so... much!"

By this time, the bard was crying so hard with heart-wrenching sobs, that she could hardly finish her sentence. Each sob sent blinding stabs of pain through her broken ribs.

Xena wrapped her strong arms around the bard and pulled her onto her lap, holding her, and rocking her back and forth like a child. Her heart was breaking so much for the bard, that she had a hard time holding her own tears back.

"It's okay, Gabrielle. It's not you - it's him. He is at fault - not you. You are perfect in every way... too good for this kind of treatment. He didn't deserve you, Gabrielle. I'm so sorry I didn't see that in him before it was too late."

Xena continued to hold and rock Gabrielle until the sobbing stopped, and the bard regained some semblance of control.

Struggling into a sitting position, Gabrielle reached up to wipe her eyes, then looked at Xena, distress clearly written on her face.

"Xena, There's one thing I haven't told you yet, but I'm afraid of your reaction when you hear this.", she said.

"Whatever it is, I'll be here for you Gabrielle, you know that, and like I've said, none of this is your fault - please don't think I could ever be angry with you over this.", Xena replied.

"I'm more afraid of your anger towards Perdicus, Xena." She said.

"Okay, out with it Gabrielle70;. You obviously have something you need to tell me70;.. Now what is it?" Xena urged, starting to lose patience with the whole thing.

"Xena, about a moon after the beatings started, I found myself with child."

Gabrielle could feel Xena's arms tense around her as she continued.

"Like I said, after that first beating, they came more frequently, and often without cause." Gabrielle paused to catch her breath. "The day I found out about the baby, Perdicus came home from the tavern drunk. His moods were unpredictable when he got that way. Sometimes he would be amorous, sometimes mean. Unfortunately, on this night, he was mean. Xena, could I please have the water skin?" Gabrielle paused to ask.

"Sure, Gabrielle, here." Xena's trembling hand reached for the water skin and held it to Gabrielle's parched lips. After a long drink, she placed the skin back on the bedside table and urged Gabrielle to continue.

"Thank you, Xena. Where was I? Oh yeah, when Perdicus came home drunk that night, he was in a nasty mood, and looking for a fight. When he was in one of those moods, it didn't take much to set him off. His excuse this time was the dirty glass left in the sink. He started accusing me of being a lousy wife and house keeper and soon, I found myself on the floor, holding my hand to the side of my face.". Gabrielle unconsciously reached up to touch her face. "He was in a wild rage, Xena. One like I had never seen before. While I was on the floor, he started kicking me over and over. After a time, I passed out. The next thing I remember was waking up in the healer's house and being told that I had lost the child."

A sob racked through Gabrielle as Xena held her closer, tears streaming down her own face.

"Xena, he told the healer that I had fallen into the well! He wasn't even man enough to own up to what he had done to me, and to our child." Looking up into Xena's eyes, all the heartbreak came pouring out, "Xena, he killed my baby! He killed my baby!" Gabrielle dissolved into tears.

Xena was beside herself with anguish for her friend. "Perdicus will pay for this", she seethed to herself. "I will hunt him down like the dog he is, and show him what it feels like to be hurt and defenseless. He will NOT get away with this!" Xena would not rest until retribution was made. She didn't care how long it took her to find him.... he WOULD pay for this. No one was allowed to hurt Gabrielle and get away with it - NO ONE!

As the tea began taking the edge off the pain, Gabrielle relaxed in Xena's arms. The tea also loosened her tongue.

"Xena, I don't know why he treated me like he did. I was faithful to him in every way."

Gabrielle paused and looked thoughtfully at Xena. "No, that's wrong." she said. " I was faithful in every way but one." she admitted. "He never owned my heart - You do. You always have."

Before Xena could react to this confession, the healer was led into the room by Toris. She quickly shooed Xena out of the way to get a closer look at Gabrielle's injuries.

Xena sat in the chair by the bed, dumbfounded by what the bard had said. "I own her heart? Does that mean what I think it does?" Xena pushed the thought aside for now, needing to help the healer care for Gabrielle. She'd have plenty of time later to deal with it.

With a lightness she should not have felt given the circumstances, Xena dove in to the lend the healer a hand.

************************************************************************************************

CHAPTER V

Xena sat by Gabrielle's bedside when the healer left, holding her hand and talking to her in soothing tones. She wasn't sure if Gabrielle heard her, since she was drifting in and out of consciousness after drinking the healing tea, but it made her feel better to just be there with her, assuring her that she was safe. Soon, Gabrielle fell into a deep sleep.

Xena tucked the covers securely under Gabrielle's chin, and then went to the kitchen in search of her mother. She found her stirring a beef stew for the evening meal at the tavern.

Cyrene saw her daughter enter the kitchen, sit heavily in a chair at the table, and drop her face into her hands. She approached Xena from behind and wrapped her arms around her, pulling Xena back into her warm embrace. Xena let her head fall back onto her mother's chest.

"Tell me what happened, little one." she whispered softly in Xena's ear.

Xena's shoulders shook with the force of her tears as she relayed Autolycus' story to her. Her voice cracked in anguish when she described her search and ultimate discovery of Gabrielle under the pile of rags in the ramshackle old hut she was living in. All the while, Cyrene held her and gave her what comfort she could.

She allowed Cyrene to hold her like that until her sobbing was under control. Finally, she motioned for Cyrene to sit by her side.

Looking into Cyrene's eyes, she asked, "Mother, My father beat you, didn't he?"

Cyrene looked everywhere but at her daughter.

"Mother," she said, placing a hand on Cyrene's arm. "When I saw the fear in Gabrielle's eyes today, I suddenly realized that I had seen it before - in your eyes when I was a child.... just before Father left us. He beat you, didn't he?"

Xena waited as her mother fidgeted uncomfortably.

"Please, Mother, I need to know." she pleaded.

Cyrene met her daughter's eyes, blue eyes mirroring each other.

Finally, Cyrene began to speak, "Yes, Xena, he did. That is why he left.... or I should say, that is why I asked him to leave."

Cyrene got up from her chair and started pacing the floor behind Xena.

"Xena, Atrius was never an affectionate man, but he was a good provider. At the time, I needed what he could give me, security and a roof over my head. Soon after Lyceus was born, he became restless, and he took it out on me. One day, when you were about seven, he chose a new target for his anger.... You. I could tolerate it as long as he left you children alone, but when he started to...."

Cyrene paused, the memory too painful to go on.

"In any case, Xena, I asked him to leave. Of course, he refused, but your uncles soon convinced him otherwise. He left in the middle of the night, after he managed to get one last beating in, of course. He has never returned."

Xena stood and drew her now weeping mother into her arms.

"Mother, I'm so sorry."

Cyrene dried her own tears and pulled back from Xena's embrace. She lifted Xena's chin with her hand and looked straight into the sky-blue eyes.

"Xena, all of that is in the past, where it belongs. It's Gabrielle who needs your help now. This type of abuse works to break down your self esteem. She will need to know that you still love her and support her."

Cyrene chuckled at the startled look on Xena's face.

"Yes, Xena, I know how you feel about Gabrielle. It's clearly written all over your face every time you look at her. I'm surprised she doesn't see it herself."

"Mother... I..." Xena stammered.

"Xena," Cyrene interrupted her, "It's all right. I couldn't be happier for you. It's not everyday that you find true love, and when you do, you need to reach out and grasp it with both hands. Gabrielle is a wonderful girl... I would be proud to call her Daughter."

Xena smiled and drew her mother into a hug. "Thanks, Mom. I love you."

"I love you too, little one." she replied. "Now go be with your bard before she wakes up in a strange place and is scared half out of her wits."

Cyrene kissed Xena on the cheek and sent her to be with Gabrielle.

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

The next few days were hard on Gabrielle. Xena spent long hours sitting with her, trying to get Gabrielle to talk more about what had happened. The normally talkative bard was reluctant to discuss the disaster her marriage had become, ashamed that Xena would think she was a failure. In six months, Perdicus managed to destroy nearly all the self confidence it had taken a year to build.

Over the next several days, Xena worked hard to convince Gabrielle that she was not at fault here.... that men like Perdicus were cowards with little self esteem of their own.... who beat the more defenseless in order to make themselves feel more important.

"It's a sickness, Gabrielle," Xena explained. ".... making you feel small, served to make him feel big and important. It's all about power. I know, I used the same tactic as a warlord."

Xena paused.

"What I don't understand, Gabrielle, is why you didn't defend yourself. I've seen you take much larger men than Perdicus, down with your staff."

"He was my husband, Xena. I made my choice when I agreed to marry him. I know now it was a mistake.... Hades, I knew then that it was a mistake. But I made the decision anyway, and I knew had to live with the consequences.... I couldn't admit my mistake to you, Xena, and I can't run to you every time my life gets a little rough."

"Gabrielle" she said, grabbing her by the shoulders, "I am here for you, do you understand?... I will always be here for you, no matter how big or small the problem is. You mean everything to me. Don't shut me out Gabrielle. Promise you'll come to me in the future if you need help, okay?", Xena asked.

Looking down at her hands, Gabrielle whispered, "Okay, Xena.... Thank you."

Xena wrapped her arms around Gabrielle and held her for hours.

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

Gabrielle, was given strict instructions not to move out of bed for a full week. After two days, she was out of her mind with boredom. Her right arm was broken, swelling her hand so much that she couldn't grasp her quill to write in her diary or scrolls, and since Xena had already heard all of her stores (Hades!, Xena had LIVED most of her stories!), she didn't get any enjoyment out of reciting them to her again.

In addition to the boredom, Gabrielle was starving most of the time. The healer had determined that the internal bleeding was due to being kicked in the stomach by Perdicus the day Autolycus came to visit, so Cyrene was instructed to feed her a light fare in small quantities to allow the injured organ to heal without being over taxed. When she was healed, she planned on eating everything in sight! Secretly, Xena was glad that her notorious appetite was recovering nicely from the trauma.

The nights were the worst for Gabrielle. She would wake up screaming, as the beatings replayed over and over in her dreamscape.

Xena slept on a palette on the floor next to her bed... that is, until the nightmares began. From that point on, Gabrielle fell asleep each night wrapped in Xena's arms. When the nightmares came, Xena would gather her up and cuddle her, chasing away her demons. They would spend long hours into the night, talking about their fears, their hopes and their dreams, until Gabrielle would drift back off into the arms of Morpheus. Xena enjoyed holding the bard in her arms each night, hard as it was to keep her lustful emotions at bay. The way Gabrielle felt, cocooned in her arms... the innocent way the bard wrapped herself around Xena while she slept, arms and legs in a tangle with her own... the look of childlike sleepiness on her face as she awoke each morning. All of these things increased Xena's love for the bard ten-fold during this time of healing.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Whenever Gabrielle was left alone, she intentionally disobeyed the healer and got out of bed. Every movement, every breath, was a constant reminder of the ordeal she had been through. Gritting her teeth through the pain, she recalled how Xena shrugged off even the most severe injuries and just kept on going. How could Gabrielle expect any less from herself? She spent these forbidden moments doing one-armed staff drills, until on the third day, she was caught by Xena. She received such a tongue lashing, she couldn't resist the urge to say "Yes, Mother!" when Xena was done, drawing a grin out of the warrior, who was trying desperately to remain angry with her. After that, Xena saw to it that there was a steady stream of visitors through the bard's room to keep the boredom at bay - and to keep her in bed.

One of her most frequent visitors was Xena's brother, Toris. Gabrielle saw his visits as a chance to learn more about her emotionally distant warrior friend. Xena was reluctant to talk about her childhood, and since Toris had first hand experiences with the warrior as a child, Gabrielle intended to take full advantage of the situation.

Toris, it seemed, was more than willing to spill the beans about his sister, and was even willing to record the information on Gabrielle's scrolls for her, since her hand was still too swollen to write. Gabrielle even convinced him to scribe her latest story, while she dictated it to him. For the better part of that week, they spent long hours sitting side by side on her bed, with Gabrielle tucked up against Toris, looking over his shoulder as he recorded her tales.

It was during this time, that Gabrielle discovered Toris was in love with the blacksmith's daughter, Danella. Toris, like his sister, had trouble expressing tender feelings, and eagerly sought advice from Gabrielle on how to handle the situation. She advised him to be honest with her, and to tell her how he felt before she found another to give her affection to. It was during one of these discussions, that Toris asked her something that threw her for a loop.

"Can I ask you a personal question, Gabrielle?" he inquired?

"Sure, Toris, you can ask me anything... but I won't guarantee that I'll answer." she replied.

"Okay, here goes.... Gabrielle, why is it so easy to give advice, but yet so hard to follow it yourself?" he asked her.

Gabrielle looked at him, confused. "What do you mean?", she asked.

"Well", he continued, "You said that I should be honest with Danella about how I feel, yet I don't think you've been honest with yourself.... or with Xena".

"Toris, I don't know what you're talking about." she said, looking around the room nervously.

"Oh, I think you do. Gabrielle, look at me." he said as he cupped her chin with his hand and drew her face to look directly at him.

Gabrielle looked into his eyes and was struck by the thought "By the gods, they're Xena's eyes! I only hope Danella appreciates looking into them as much as I do Xena's."

Gabrielle attention was draw away from her daydreams by Toris' question.

"Gabrielle, how long have you been in love with Xena?" he asked.

Gabrielle's eyes grew wide with panic. "I... I... Toris, I... Damn! Is it that obvious?" she asked, looking away before Toris could see the pink tinge of embarrassment on her face.

"I've watched your eyes when you look at her, Gabrielle... the way they follow her around the room... the way your face lights up with the unmistakable look of love and devotion. Gabrielle, how long have you felt that way?" he asked.

Gabrielle dropped her chin to her chest and let the tears roll down her face.

"I can't remember not loving her Toris. But, I don't think she feels that way about me. She still sees me as a child. Besides, I don't even know if she's attracted to women. Toris, I can't take the chance of losing her... or our friendship. I would rather love her in silence that to risk that."

By this time, she was sobbing openly.

Toris, reached over and pulled her tightly to him. She buried her head into his shoulder and relaxed into his embrace.

"Shh, It's okay Gabrielle. It will all work out - you'll see. But I still think you need to take your own advice and tell Xena how you feel. You owe her that much."

Just as Toris was consoling Gabrielle in this way, Xena pushed open the door to the room, entering with Gabrielle's lunch tray.

"Lunch time, my bard", she announced, and then stopped short when she took in the scene before her. She just stood there for a few seconds, frozen by the sight of Gabrielle in her brother's arms.

Snapping back to her senses, she quickly tried to cover her shock.

"I, ah.... I hope you're hungry. Mother sent up a loaf of your favorite nutbread."

Xena quickly set the tray down on the table next to Gabrielle's bed and ran out the door before Toris or Gabrielle could react. She ran all the way to the stables, stopping only when she closed the door and leaned her back against it.

"Oh gods!, Oh gods!" she said out loud in an anguished voice as tears gathered and rolled down her cheeks while she gasped for breath. She mentally chided herself for not seeing this coming. "How could I have been so blind?" she thought. "Of course she would be attracted to him. I've got to get out of here for a while... I need to think."

While she was saddling Argo to make her escape, the door to the stable burst open and Toris rushed in.

"Xena, It's not what it looked like. If you ride out of here, you'll be making the biggest mistake of your life." he warned her.

Xena continued to saddle Argo. She looked over at her brother. Disguising the anguish in her voice, she said, "Toris, Gabrielle is the sweetest, most wonderful person the gods ever put on this earth. You'll be very happy with her.... but I warn you - if you hurt her in any way, I will kill you. Is that understood?"

With that warning, Xena quickly mounted Argo and was off on a dead run through the field.

"Xena!" Toris yelled. "Xena, come back here. You don't understand!. Damn you, Xena!"

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Xena rode Argo hard through the rest of the day and into the night, stopping only when the mare refused to go on. Sliding out of the saddle, she fell to her knees on the ground and buried her face in her hands. Suddenly, she threw her head back, released a blood chilling howl, and then collapsed into a state of unconsciousness.

The sun was high in the sky when Xena finally regained consciousness the next day. she rolled over and realized that she had been lying on the ground, without the benefit of a fire or bedroll. She knew she would pay for it in a variety of aches and pains when she tried to get up.

Her mind was a little fuzzy when she awoke, but it wasn't long before the memories of the previous day invaded her consciousness.

"Gabrielle", she thought. "Am I destined to spend the rest of my life seeing you in the arms of another? How can I live each day, knowing that your heart belongs to Toris? How can I handle seeing you with him, knowing it is HIM that you love...., knowing that it's HIS arms you sleep in each night..., HIS body that you make love to?" Xena spent the remainder of the day lying there, wallowing in her own pain, convincing herself that she wasn't worthy of Gabrielle's love.

Finally, as the sun was setting over the horizon, Xena resolved to return to the inn and face her demons. She would stay until she knew Gabrielle was safe and well, then she would leave to allow Toris and Gabrielle a chance at happiness without her around getting in the way.

************************************************************************************************

CHAPTER VI

Xena returned to the inn just before dawn and went directly to the stable to take care of Argo. She spent several candlemarks brushing and grooming her beloved mare, delaying the inevitable confrontation with Gabrielle. Finally, allowing her cowardice to win out, she spread a blanket in the hayloft and fell into an uneasy sleep.

When Xena appeared in the kitchen of the inn later in the evening, she was met by a very angry Cyrene.

"By the gods, Xena, do you always run away from your heart like that? You tore out of here like the flames of Tautarus were at your heels!"

"Mother...", Xena attempted to explain.

"Don't you 'Mother' me, young lady!" she said, backing Xena into a table.

"You scared the life out of all of us. Gabrielle has been beside herself with grief since you ran off!"

"Then let Toris comfort her!", she spat.

"She doesn't need Toris.... she needs You." Cyrene shouted back.

"I know what I saw, Mother!"

"What you saw, Xena, was one friend comforting another - nothing more."

"I wish I could believe that, Mother. It's too late for me now." Xena replied unhappily, sinking down into a chair and burying her head in her hands.

Cyrene approached Xena and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Daughter, you need to look with your heart - not with your eyes. Until you do, you don't stand a chance with Gabrielle. Now, if you're smart, you'll march right up to her room and apologize for scaring her half to death!"

Cyrene turned her back on Xena. Picking up a bowl of biscuits, she turned to addresses Xena again.

"I have customers to wait on. Take my advice, Xena, before it is too late."

Cyrene left the kitchen for the dining room, leaving Xena with her thoughts.

Long moments later, Xena took a deep breath and rose to her feet. Her mother's words had given her hope. Maybe.... maybe.... Well, in any case, she did owe Gabrielle an apology. With that in mind, Xena headed for Gabrielle's room.

Pushing the door open, Xena nudged her way into the room and saw the bard curled up on her side with her back to the door. Thinking she was asleep, Xena began to slowly back out of the room.

Suddenly, Gabrielle turned toward the door. "Xena? Is that you?" she asked, distress clearly written in her voice.

Xena froze, then stepped back into the room and softly closed the door.

Gabrielle struggled to sit up in bed then reached her arms out toward Xena. "By the gods, Xena, I was so worried about you!"

Xena quickly closed the distance between them and sat on the edge of the bed, taking Gabrielle into her arms. She held the sobbing bard close to her, cherishing the feel of her heartbeat against her own.

After what seemed like and eternity, she realized the bard had fallen asleep in her arms. Xena slowly eased them both down on the bed and relaxed in the feel of the bard laying close to her. Gabrielle subconsciously pulled the warrior closer, throwing her arm around Xena's waist and snuggling her head down into her shoulder. Before long, warrior and bard had both succumbed to a deep sleep, where they remained until the next morning's light.

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

When Gabrielle and Xena awoke that morning, the warrior was attentive, but emotionally distant. All attempts at getting her to discuss the misunderstanding with Toris were thwarted. Somehow Gabrielle had to make Xena understand that Toris was nothing but a dear friend to her.... that her heart belonged to the warrior.

Judging by Xena's reaction to what she thought was going on between her and Toris, Gabrielle felt renewed hope that Xena could return her love, but the fear of losing Xena still made her reluctant to confront the issue head on. She would just have to find another way to get through to her.

Later that morning, Gabrielle was finally let out of bed. After changing the dressing on her thigh and rubbing salve into the whip marks on her back, Xena wrapped her warmly in a cloak and escorted her (actually, she carried her) to a nice overstuffed chair on the front porch of the inn. Tucking a blanket around her legs, Xena leaned over and gave her a quick kiss on top of the head, then trotted out into the field across the yard from the inn to retrieve a couple of stray cattle.

Gabrielle occupied herself by writing in her diary. The swelling in her hand was nearly gone, so she was now able to write legibly. Gabrielle was especially glad for this fact, since Toris' help with her journal had led to such a mess with Xena.

Several candlemarks later, while she was concentrating on her writing, she was distracted by a harsh voice talking to her.

"I knew I would find you here, you whoring bitch!" the voice said.

Gabrielle's world came crashing down around her. Perdicus was standing at the bottom of the porch steps, a murderous look in his eyes. He had obviously been drinking, and looked as though he hadn't bathed in the entire week Gabrielle had been gone.

"Per... Perdicus!" she stammered. Gabrielle's eyes desperately looked around for Xena. This action was not missed by Perdicus.

Noticing the fear on Gabrielle's face, and seeing her eyes darting around in a vain attempt to find Xena, he sneered, "Your whore girlfriend isn't around right now... I made sure of that before I made my appearance. In fact, I've been watching you for the past few days, just waiting for the right moment to take back what is mine."

He started pacing back and forth on the bottom step, pounding his right fist into his left palm over and over. He was enjoying the immense feelings of discomfort that he was obviously instilling in the bard.

"What do you want, Perdicus?" she asked, hoping to reason with him.

"Why, I want you... Wife. You see, I OWN you. You are my property - you belong to me, and I want you back." he said.

Gabrielle's stomach turned with revulsion and fear with each word that left his lips. "Xena, I need you, please come to me!" Gabrielle thought desperately.

"No, Perdicus. You DON'T own me. I own myself." she replied bravely.

"That's bullshit and you know it, Gabrielle." he screamed into her face, taking one step closer to her - his hands reaching out as though to choke her.

Seeing that she had provoked him into losing control, he forced himself to calm down. He had to do this right. He had to do it quietly, and quickly before that warrior bitch returned.

"Perdicus, you had better leave. If Xena finds you here, she will kill you." Gabrielle warned, mentally noting the position of her Amazon fighting staff by her side.

"Oh, I will have finished what I came to do before she'll even know I was here. I was careless back in Potedia,, Gabrielle. I should have made sure the job was finished before I left you there. Now, I have to tie up the lose ends and get rid of the evidence."

He started advancing further up the steps towards her.

"How did you know I was here?" Gabrielle asked, stalling for time.

"The barkeep at the inn in Potedia was kind enough to tell me that the warrior bitch came looking for you. Thanks to you and your constant rambling, I knew exactly where she lived. It didn't take me long to figure out that she would have brought you here."

He walked up one more step.

"Perdicus, please leave me alone. I can't be with you. I can't be with someone who is so cruel and heartless. Perdicus, you killed our child! I can never forgive you for that." Gabrielle tried to reason with him, but soon realized that he was insane with hatred and jealousy.

At the mention of the child, Perdicus flew into a rage. Pacing back and forth, he screamed at Gabrielle. "The child? You mean your bastard? How do I know the child was even mine Gabrielle? How do I know it didn't belong to the lover you had in our home the day I caught you a half-moon ago?"

"I was faithful to you, Perdicus. The child was yours, and you killed it. My love for you died with the child, Perdicus. Please leave, I can't be with someone I don't love."

"Love has nothing to do with this Gabrielle. Do you really think that I EVER loved you? NO! I wanted someone to clean and cook for me, and to satisfy my needs. I wanted someone who would OBEY me and accept their place beneath me. That someone was supposed to be you, Gabrielle. Your parents promised you to me when you were only 13, remember? But no... you had to go and ruin it all by running off with Xena. Tell me Gabrielle, does it feel good being her whore?"

That was just about all Gabrielle could take. Before Perdicus knew what hit him, Gabrielle grabbed the staff by her side and swung it in a full arc, landing it squarely on the side of his head. He went down hard.

Gabrielle stood over him, every inch of her being shaking with rage.

"I am NOT a whore, and neither is Xena! I DO NOT belong to you, and I never will, Perdicus. Now do yourself a favor and get out of here before Xena returns and makes you wish that death was the worst thing you had to look forward to!" she screamed.

Perdicus suddenly reached out and grabbed Gabrielle's sprained ankle. She went down, howling in pain. With blood running down his face, he crawled up her body, attempting to get his hands around her throat.

Trying to ignore the throbbing pain in her ankle, Gabrielle swung her staff once more across Perdicus' back. He rolled off from her, clutching his back with both hands.

Gabrielle took advantage of her freedom and crawled to her feet, running down the steps and towards the field as fast as her injured ankle would let her, calling Xena's name the whole way.

Perdicus struggled to his feet, shook off the effects of the blow to his back, and took off after her.

Gabrielle made it to the edge of the field before her ankle gave way and she fell hard to the ground, jarring her still tender ribs and causing a sudden loss of breath. As she lay there gasping for air, she saw Perdicus approaching her, an evil look on his face. Gabrielle struggled to her feet, using her staff for leverage.

"No... No, Perdicus. Not again! Please don't do this!" she pleaded with him as he walked toward her with a determined gait.

Suddenly, a part of Gabrielle's brain registered a familiar sound...

"Yiyiyiyiyiyi....". "She heard me!" Gabrielle thought. "I knew she would."

She turned to watch Xena on Argo's back, flying across the field toward her at a full gallop. It was the most magnificent sight Gabrielle had ever seen.

Gabrielle was facing Xena and didn't hear Perdicus come up behind her, once more tackling her to the ground and sending another painful jolt to her ribs. Perdicus rolled her onto her back and straddled her waist, reaching down at the same time to circle her neck in his hands.

The next thing Gabrielle remembered was six feet of pissed-off Warrior Princess flying through the air, wrenching Perdicus from his perch on top of her.

The pair landed a few feet away. Within seconds, Xena was on her feet and striding toward a very unfortunate Perdicus with a feral smile on her face. Reaching down, she grabbed the front of his tunic and yanked him to his feet, drawing is face very close to her own.

"Didn't your mother ever tell you it's not nice to hit girls?" she hissed into his face.

Xena didn't give him a chance to answer. She drew back her fist and landed it squarely on his nose. With a sickening crack of bones, blood flew everywhere.

"How does it feel, big man, huh? Do you like being defenseless?" CRACK - another punch landed on his jaw, sending him flying to the ground.

Perdicus struggled to his feet, only to feel several of his ribs give way under Xena's kick. He lay on the ground once more, doubled over in excruciating pain.

"How does it feel to be kicked around, you bastard? Now you're at my mercy, just like Gabrielle and your child were at yours."

Xena stood over him, drew her sword and placed it at the base of his throat.

"How does it feel to be the victim Perdicus?", she asked.

Again, not giving him a chance to answer, she pushed the sword into his throat just enough to break the skin. Feeling the trickle of blood flow freely down the side of his neck, Perdicus' eyes took on a terrifying gleam.

"You look scared, little man? What's the matter? Are you afraid to die?" she taunted him.

"No more.... Please don't do this.... I don't wanna die!" he begged.

"Well, now you know how Gabrielle felt when you were doing this to her. Now you know how she felt when you were murdering her child! You are the sorriest excuse for a man that I have ever seen. Now prepare to die!" she warned as she raised her sword above her head.

Trying to regain her senses, Gabrielle rolled onto her side and reached out for Xena. She couldn't let her kill him. She'd be no better than him if she did.

"NO!!!.... Xena, please don't kill him. He isn't worth it. I'm okay. Please.... remember your promise!" Gabrielle cried.

Gabrielle's voice managed to penetrate through the haze of Xena's bloodlust as she stopped and considered the promise she had made to the bard... the promise not to become a monster if anything were to happen to her. Xena lowered her sword, but continued to hold it over a very frightened Perdicus.

By this time, Toris had heard the ruckus and ran from the stables to see what was happening. He saw Xena holding a sword over a man who was laying on the ground with blood pouring from his nose, mouth and neck. He called to Cyrene to summon the law then drew his own sword and approached Xena carefully. As he neared, he saw that Xena struggling with herself emotionally.

"Xena," he said quietly. She spared him a sideways glance.

"I assume this is Perdicus?" he asked. Xena nodded her head slightly.

"Xena, I've got him covered.... it's all right. Put your sword down. Mother's gone to summon the constable. Put your sword down and go to Gabrielle - she needs you."

Toris' soothing tones had the desired effect. Xena started to relax the rigid stance she had been holding herself in. After a few more moments, she finally removed her sword from Perdicus' throat and walked a few steps away from him to help Gabrielle to her feet.

Toris held his sword on Perdicus until the village constable arrived, then he dragged him to his feet and bound his wrists behind him. Spinning him around to face him once more, Toris grabbed the front of Perdicus' tunic and leaned down into his face. With as much venom as he could muster, he said, "You will live to regret what you have done to my sisters, you bastard."

Now it was Xena's turn. She approached Perdicus with such hatred in her eyes that he visually shrank back from her stare.

"I should have killed you!" she spat at him. "You would be dead right now if it wasn't for Gabrielle."

Xena turned from him and walked a few paces away, running a hand through her hair, obviously trying to keep her temper under control. Suddenly, she turned back and charged at him. Stopping within inches of his face, she leaned into him.

"You are a fool!" she spat, driving her index finger repeatedly into his chest. "You had the most precious thing in the world, and you destroyed it! You had Gabrielle's love and devotion.... I would give my life for that!"

"You already have it, Xena."

Xena, Toris and Cyrene all turned to see where the statement had come from.

Gabrielle was standing there, leaning heavily on her staff.

In a last ditch effort to say his piece, Perdicus spat at Gabrielle, "I knew you were her whore, you bitch!"

Toris planted a quick jab on the end of Perdicus' already broken nose and sent him once more to the ground. Dragging him to his feet again, he helped the constable herd him away, saying, "I said you would regret messing with my sisters!"

Cyrene quietly led Argo to the stable.

Xena, oblivious to every thing around her except her bard, approached Gabrielle, not quite daring to touch her. "Gabrielle, are you saying..."

"That I love you? Yes, that is exactly what I'm saying, Xena. I have loved you since the day I laid eyes on you. Not like a friend... not like a sister. I love you with all my heart warrior. I am in love with you."

"But, Toris....." she stammered.

"Toris is your brother and my friend, and by the way, you owe him an apology! When you came into our room and saw me in his arms, it is because he was comforting me. Xena, I was crying because I didn't think you could love me the way I loved you." Gabrielle explained.

"Then why Gabrielle... Why did you...?"

"Why did I marry Perdicus? Is that what you're asking?"

Xena nodded.

"Because he needed me, and because he said he loved me." Gabrielle replied.

Xena dropped her chin to her chest, and in a little girl voice, said, "But I needed you too..."

"At the time, I didn't realize that, Xena. I knew you loved me, but I thought that love was only in friendship."

Gabrielle paused and limped back and forth, her hand nervously arranging the bangs on her forehead.

"Xena, you are so damned independent.... I didn't think you needed anyone, or anything. I thought our relationship would always be one sided and that you could never return my love - at least not the kind of love I wanted and needed."

Xena's head snapped up, blue eyes meeting green. "I have always loved you Gabrielle. I fell totally, head over heels, out of my mind, in love with you the moment I saw you stand up against Draco's slavers."

"Then it's my turn to ask why, Xena. Why didn't you stop me? Why did you let me marry him?" And then in a quieter voice... "Why didn't you tell me you loved me?"

"I didn't stop you Gabrielle, because I loved you too much to deny you the home and children I thought would make you happy... and I didn't say I loved you because I was afraid of losing you. Besides, Gabrielle, how could I condemn you to a future full of danger and uncertainty? We'll never know when some dark figure from my past, will use you to punish me."

Gabrielle brought her hands to her eyes, brushing away the tears that were flowing freely now.

"Xena, I don't need a home and children to make me happy. I need you. YOU are my family. YOU are my home. YOU make me happy. I don't need anything more than that. Xena, I know the risks of loving you are high, but the rewards far outweigh the risks. I want to spend the rest of my life with you Xena. I love you,"

Xena smiled through her own tears and took a step towards the bard. Reaching up with both hands, she cupped Gabrielle's face in her palms. Looking deep into emerald pools, Xena lowered her forehead to touch Gabrielle's.

"I love you too, my bard. More than I have ever loved anyone before." she whispered.

"C'mere, you big dumb warrior. I need to be kissed." Gabrielle said, pulling Xena's mouth down to her's. Their lips met in a blaze of liquid fire.

Several moments later, Gabrielle pulled away from Xena and looked directly into azure eyes.

"Xena, Love me..., make me yours." she pleaded.

Xena's breath caught in her throat, fear evident on her face. She wanted desperately to make love to her bard, but she had to be sure Gabrielle knew what this meant to her.

"Gabrielle, Are you sure? This means FOREVER for me.... I need to know that it means the same for you. If we do this, there will be no turning back." Xena stated.

"Forever, Xena.... Forever." was the bard's reply.

Xena bent over and lifted Gabrielle into her arms, being very careful not to further aggravate her injuries. She carried her into the inn and to their room, where she laid her gently on the bed and lay beside her, folding her long frame around the bard.

Propping herself up on her elbows, she looked deep into Gabrielle's eyes once more.

"Gabrielle," she said, "I have had sex with many others, both men and women, but I have never made love before. You are the first one that I have ever truly loved. I want this to be special for you... for both of us. This has to be something we both want."

Xena paused, giving Gabrielle every chance to back out if she wanted to.

"Are you sure Gabrielle? Do you know what this kind of love involves?" Xena asked, needing to be sure again, that Gabrielle knew her heart.

Gabrielle tried desperately to soothe the warrior's fears.

"Xena, I am an Amazon Queen. I am well aware of how women can love each other. I am not afraid. I want this with all my heart, Xena. I love you, and I know you won't hurt me. Now, love me, Xena. Please."

Xena pushed her own fears deep into the recesses of her mind as she lowered herself over the bard.

Xena looked deep into the bard's emerald eyes, and said, "I love you too Gabrielle..... Forever." before their lips sought refuge in each other.

THE END (or maybe THE BEGINNING?.....)



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