DISCLAIMERS:

COPYRIGHT: Xena Warrior Princess, and Gabrielle, are the property of MCA/Universal and are used here without permission. No copyright infringement implied or intended. No dinars will be made on this story. The leading ladies resemble our two X:WP heroines. Any character or name resemblance to 'real' people currently living or dead is completely coincidental. The characters are mine... If you want to use them, please ask me first. Download it, print it out and pass it around if you'd like, but be sure to include these disclaimers.

SUBTEXT: This is a story about two women who are very committed to a caring and loving relationship. Sex is part of that relationship, but not the focus. There are some mildly graphic sex scenes within, but nothing explicit or kinky. If this type of love offends you, if you are less than 18 years old, or if love is illegal where you live, climb on board the anti-subtext train and get outta town.

VIOLENCE: Not much. This episode refers to the after effects of domestic violence, but does not contain any such violence itself. I would classify it as Hurt/Comfort. Just for the record, I believe domestic violence is the work of a sick mind. If you are currently involved in a violent relationship... GET OUT OF IT NOW... RUN - DON'T WALK, TO THE NEAREST EXIT!

TIME LINE: This is the eighth installment in a modern day Uber-Xena sequence, starting with "The 'Commitment'" and followed by "A Family in Blood", "Personal Preferences", "Fighting City Hall", "Visions in Paradise", "What's In A Name?", and "Promise Me Paradise". Since these stories are continuations of each other, there are events mentioned within that will not make much sense if you haven't read them all in order.

AUTHOR'S NOTES: I strongly believe that love is love, regardless of how it is packaged, so please don't flame me for believing in something so wonderful. All flames will be flushed down the toilet, however, I do encourage constructive criticism. Send all feedback to warriorx@together.net

SPECIAL ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS: To Brett: Thank you for providing some much needed clinical information and making this tale a lot more believable and technically accurate. You've been a great sounding board, friend, and a wonderful source of information. I could not have written this story without your help. To Rosa: For "Rosa-Proofing" the text...I dared you on this one girl... - thanks for the inputs! To Herbard: A very special thank you for editing my copy. As always, my friend, you have provided immeasurable help and moral support, and have prevented me, once more, from looking like a literary idiot! Thank you, kd. :-)

While I Was Gone...

By: kd bard

Started 02/04/99

Finished 02/18/99

CHAPTER X

Billie's second day of therapy was very similar to the first, with one exception...Billie was in pain from the previous day's workout before the therapy even began. Her mood blackened the moment Joseph walked into the room. Scowling, she turned away and refused to acknowledge his presence.

"Okay, Billie." he said, after nodding a hello Cat who was standing by the window sipping a cup of coffee. "Time to get to work."

"No." Billie said.

"No?... Did you say no?" Joseph answered her.

"Wwhat ppart of that ddidn't you uuunderstand?" she asked angrily.

"Well, considering that 'No' isn't in my vocabulary... all of it. I don't take 'no' for an answer, Billie. I'm here to do a job, and like it or not, you are going to cooperate." he warned.

"I ssaid, no!" Billie yelled.

Joseph leaned over the end of the bed and grasped Billie's ankles with his hands. "Well, I said, yes!" he returned, giving her legs a steady pull until she was lying flat on her back. Coming around to the side of the bed, he went to work maniuplating her legs.

"Damn you!" Billie shouted. "Leave mme alone!"

Having little control over her muscles, her attempts at kicking him away were ineffectual.

"I suggest you stop struggling, Billie, before you hurt yourself." Joseph commented, continuing his manipulations.

Cat had put her coffee cup down and was ready to pounce on the large man. All she needed was a sign from Billie.

"Don't ttouch me!" Billie yelled again.

Joseph stopped and leaned over her. "All right... That's quite enough, Billie. I'm a big guy... too big for you to mess with, okay? Just cooperate, and this will be over with before you know it." he said.

Billie looked over at Cat, silently pleading with her to do something. That's all it took. Cat launched herself at the large man, and soon found herself flat on her back, lying across Billie's legs.

"Cat!" Billie said fearfully.

Somehow, Joseph had seen her coming and intercepted her tackle, swinging her up and around in one large arm and landing her on the bed in front of him, across Billie's legs. Getting to his feet, he reached down and picked Cat up, threw her over his shoulder and walked out of the room with her, depositing her in a chair in the hallway. Blocking the door to Billie's room, he pointed at her and said, "Until you can learn to behave youself in there, therapy sessions are off limits to you... Understand?"

Cat was speechless as she watched the big man go back into Billie's room and shut the door. An hour and a half later, he came out again and stopped in front of Cat who was still sitting in the chair he had deposited her in. "Look," he said. "I apologize if I got a little rough earlier, but sometimes drastic measures are called for. I know what I do hurts in the beginning.... but it's necessary." He looked back over his shoulder into Billie's room, and then back to the petite red head. "She needs you right now." he said while he walked away.

Cat quickly scrambled to her feet and entered Billie's room. Billie was lying on the bed, the sheets in wild disarray around her. It was obvious that she had given the man a hard time throughout the entire session. Cat walked over to Billie's bedside and sat down. Billie turned her face toward Cat and locked eyes with the smaller woman. They sat there staring at each other for long moments before the door opened and Julie entered, ready to start her occupational therapy.

**********

Cat went to her parent's house while Billie was engaged in OT, lunch, and her afternoon rest session before seeing Dr. O'Brien. She needed to prepare the children for their visit with Billie that evening.

A small body launched itself at her the minute she walked in the door. Wrapping her arms tightly around the child, she said, "Oh Skylar, my love. I have missed you so much! Where's my kiss?"

"Right here, Mama." the child said as she took Cat's face in her hands and planted a big sloppy kiss on her mother's mouth before hugging her again. Pulling away, Skylar looked around and said, "Where's Mommy?"

"Mommy is still in the hospital, Sweetie. Wanna go see her tonight?" Cat asked.

"Yippie!" Skylar clapped. "Can we go now?" she asked.

"Tonight, love bug... after you've had dinner. Grandpa will bring you, okay?"

"Where will you be?" Skylar asked.

"I'll be with Mommy, waiting for you, Tara and Seth to come visit." she replied. Looking around she asked, "Where's your brother and sister, honey?"

"They're in the family room playing 'tendo 64. Want me to get them?" Skylar asked.

"Would you, Sweet Heart?" Cat replied as Skylar ran out of the room.

"How is she Caitlain." a voice said from behind her.

Cat swung around to see her mother in the doorway of the kitchen, a dishcloth slung over her shoulder. Their eyes met as a look of understanding passed between them. Cat covered her mouth with her hand to prevent a sob from escaping, then ran to her mother's open arms. Several minutes later, Cat felt another set of arms circle around her and looked down to see Seth snuggling close into her side. Cat looked at her mother who graciously took a step back so that Cat could comfort her son.

"Hi love." Cat whispered into Seth's hair. Seth just held on tighter. "You okay?" she asked. He nodded, then released her, trying to hide the tear that had escaped his eye. Cat pretended not to notice. "Well, Scout, feel up to visiting with Mom tonight?"

Seth's eyes brightened considerably as he looked at her. "Really?" he asked.

"Really." Cat said. "After dinner, okay?"

"Great!" he exclaimed.

Ruffling his hair, Cat contined. "Well, there are a few things you need to know before tonight, so if you want to go drag your sister away from that video game, we need to have a talk. Okay?"

"I'll get her." Seth said, running off toward the other room. Moments later, he was back with an irritated Tara in tow.

"Mama, I was almost beating the game and Seth shut it off on me!" she whined, shooting her brother a hateful look.

"Don't blame your brother, Rugrat, I sent him after you. And by the way, is that any way to greet your mother, who you haven't seen in two days?" Cat asked her 8 year old daughter.

Tara smiled and ran into Cat's open arms, jumping up at the last moment so her legs straddled Cat's waist. "You're getting kind of big to be doing that, pip squeek. Pretty soon, you'll be knocking me over!" Cat observed as Tara threw her arms around her neck and hugged her hard. Cat placed a raspberry in her daughter's neck, making her squeal, and wiggle away to drop to the floor.

Finally, she had them all in the same room together. Dropping to the floor to sit cross legged, the children immediately gathered around her to hear what she had to say. "Okay." she began. "Tara, I've already told Seth and Sky this, but I want to take you to visit with Mom tonight." She looked around at three grinning faces. "However... there is something you need to know before you get there." she said.

"What?" Tara asked.

"Well, she.... she won't know any of you." Cat said.

"What do you mean?" Seth questioned, worry written all over his face.

"Seth, Honey... You know she's had brain surgery, right?" she waited as he nodded. "Well, sometimes after brain surgery, the patient wakes up and doesn't have any memories. That's what's happened to Mom."

"Does she know you?" Seth asked.

"No, she doesn't. She doesn't recognize Grandpa either." Cat explained.

"Will she get her memory back?" Tara said.

"We hope so, Sweet heart, but right now, she's pretty scared. She doesn't even know who she is." Cat said.

"I wanna see Mommy." Skylar interjected.

Cat opened her arms for Skylar to climb into them. Hugging her close, she continued. "Grandpa and I have talked to her about you, so she know's you're coming to see her tonight, but I don't want you to be upset if she doesn't recognize you or remember your names, okay?" Cat asked.

Seth and Tara nodded their heads while Skylar snuggled in closer. "Okay... any more questions?" Cat asked.

"Can I color her some pictures, Mama?" Tara asked.

Cat smiled and reached out to touch her daughter's cheek. "I'm sure she'd like that, Tara...She'd like that a lot."

"I made a beaded necklace in Cub Scouts last night, Ma. Do you think she'd like that?" Seth asked.

Cat's eyes teared over. "Yes, Honey, I think she would." she answered.

"I'll color some picture too!" Skylar piped in.

Cat smiled and hugged her youngest daughter tighter. Looking at all three, she smiled and said, "Mom and I are the luckiest mothers in the world. Thank you Sweeties. Now, how 'bout helping you old mother to her feet so I can get back to the hospital?" she joked.

Seth grinned from ear to ear as he lent Cat a hand to her feet. Hugging each of them and promising to see them later that night, she kissed them all goodbye and said I love you's all around before hugging her own mother and heading out the door.

**********

Cat arrived back at the hospital just in time for Billie's counseling session with Dr. O'Brien, her spirits much improved after spending some time with the kids. Deciding to use her father's direct approach, she waltzed into the room like there was nothing wrong and perched herself on the edge of Billie's bed. Billie eyed her warily.

"Hi!" she said, cheerfully. "How did your OT session go?"

Billie's blue eyes locked with Cat's green. "Fine." was all she said, however, her eyes continued to hold Cat's gaze.

Cat got the distinct impression that Billie was waging some internal battle as she watched a wide range of emotion parade across the tall woman's face. "You're not the only fighter in this family, warrior!" she thought to herself as she stubbornly refused to break the stare.

Long moments passed before their silent conversation was interrupted by Dr. O'Brien's arrival. Little did the ladies know, the doctor had arrived a few moments earlier and was standing in the doorway watching the silent confrontation with interest. Clearing her throat, she announced her arrival. Cat fully expected to be asked to leave when Dr. O'Brien came in, but was pleasantly surprised when Billie consented for her to stay. She chose the chair by the window, to allow the doctor a closer position to Billie by the bed.

Seeing where Cat had positioned herself, Dr. O'Brien turned and said, "Cat, bring your chair closer... That's it... right over there next to Billie...good. Now, let's get started." she said after Cat had obediently pulled her chair next to the bed.

They talked at some length about how Billie felt inside, the fear and uncertainty about her future that was gnawing at her stomach.

"I don't knnow wwho I aam. I don't even knnow wwhere I live!" Billie said at one point.

Cat looked at Billie in amazement. "Billie... You live with me... with our children. We want you to come home, love." Cat pleaded, reaching forward and then quickly pulling her hand back, anticipating Billie's reaction.

This action was not lost on Dr. O'Brien, who turned to Cat and said, "Cat, Why did you pull your hand back just now?"

Cat broke the stare that Billie was holding her captive with, and turned to the doctor. Looking down at her hands, she said, "Billie doesn't like me to touch her."

Dr. O'Brien looked at Billie. "Why not?" she asked the taller woman.

Billie's brow knit together as she looked at the doctor, then to Cat, and then back to the doctor. "I don't know." she said.

Dr. O'Brien stood up and sat on the edge of Billie's bed. "Billie, give me your hand." The doctor said, taking the hand that was offered to her. "Now you, Cat." she said to the smaller woman. Cat placed her hand in the doctor's open palm. Turning Billie's hand palm up, she placed Cat's hand, palm down, into it. Billie instinctively tried to pull away, but Dr. O'Brien held tight. "Now close your hands." she said to both of them.

Billie stared down at their joined hands with trepedation as Cat's fingers intertwined with her own. "Billie...." Dr. O'Brien said to her when her hand remained open. Billie looked at the doctor and understood the expectant look on her face. Finally, she allowed her fingers to close over Cat's hand. Cat's smaller hand all but disappeared into Billie's larger one. Billie looked at Cat and saw tears threatening to spill from her eyes as Cat's attention was glued to their intertwined hands.

"Cat." Billie said in just barely a whisper.

Cat looked up, causing the tears to overflow onto her cheeks.

"I'm sorry." Billie said, before abruptly letting go of Cat's hand.

Cat felt like she had been thrown a lifeline, only to have it snatched away from her as she was reaching for it. She took a huge gulp of air and let it out, causing her body to shudder with emotion.

Billie had clasped her hands together on her lap and was staring at them, unable, or unwilling to meet Cat's eyes a second time.

**********

When Dr. O'Brien left, Cat was standing at the window, arms crossed in front of her, staring out over the city. Her heart was broken in a million pieces, and she was beginning to think it would never be put back together again. "How can Billie be so cold?" she thought. "By the gods, even an angry Billie was easier to deal with than this indifferent one. I don't know what to do... I don't know how to make her see how much I love her and need her. Billie, please come back to me... I don't want to live without you... please." her mind screamed as she held her self tensely in front of the window.

Billie was sitting on the bed, propped up on both sides by pillows, watching Cat struggling with herself by the window. Somewhere in the recesses of her mind, an emotion started to build.... guilt?.... anger?....anxiety? Billie wasn't sure what it was, but it was certainly there. "Her hand felt so soft." She thought. "So soft, yet so strong.... and familiar. God, I don't know what to do! I am scared and lost. Someone please help me find my way back...please." Taking a deep breath, she said outloud, "Cat?"

Cat 's head snapped around at the same time a deep voice from the doorway said, "Okay... you... out!"

"Excuse me?" Cat said angrily as she saw Joseph standing there.

"I said, out. You know the rules... " Joseph said.

"No, I'm not leaving!" Cat replied stubbornly, hands on her hips. There was no way in hell she was leaving after what had happened in counseling today.

If Cat had looked, she would have seen a grin cross Billie's face as she took her stance.

Joseph smiled at her. "You've got balls, lady. I like that!" he thought to himself. Out loud, he said, "Okay, I'll make you a deal... You stay back and out of the way... and NO interference, unless I ask you for some.... and I'll let you stay... Deal?" he said, reaching out his hand to Cat.

Cat smiled and placed her hand in his. "Deal." she replied.

For the next hour, Cat bit her tongue and sat white knuckled in the chair by the window as Joseph put Billie through her routine. Cat could tell by the look on her wife's face and the line of sweat on her upper lip, that she was trying very hard not to cry out. Finally, Joseph sat back and asked Billie for her hands. Cat had always marvelled at the size of Billie's hands, so when they disappeared completely inside of Joseph's, her eyes grew wide with fascination.

Joseph took Billie's hands and said to her, "Now use me as an achor and pull yourself into a sitting position."

Billie looked at him as though he was out of his mind.

"Come on, you can do it... Pull against my hands... that's it... pull... good." he coached as Billie used every ounce of energy she had to lift her head and upper body off the bed, and pull herself toward Joseph. When she had managed to pull herself completely up so that her upper body was at a 90 degree angle to her legs, Joseph wrapped his big arms around her and hugged her tight. "I knew you could do it, Billie!" he exclaimed before gently guiding her back to the bed. She looked over at Cat with a big smile on her face. Cat smiled back with all the love and tenderness she could muster.

"Aggain." Billie said.

"No... I think that's enough for today, Billie." he said.

Billie reached over and touched his arm. "Please?" she asked.

Joseph smiled and held out his hands, "One more time." he said as she pulled herself up.

************************************************************************************************ CHAPTER XI

After Joseph left, Laura came in to massage Billie's muscles. This time Cat asked her questions throughout the whole routine, hoping to be able to pick up enough knowledge to be of some help to Billie later. Laura was more than happy to help Cat learn the fundamentals and explained each technique carefully as she gently massaged away Billie's pain. Finally, the massage was over and the ladies were left alone once more.

"You did a very good job in therapy this afternoon, Billie." Cat said, knowing she was making idle chit chat, but feeling too awkward with the silence to let it continue for too long.

"Th..thank you." Billie replied.

"I was very proud of you when you pulled yourself up." Cat continued.

Billie looked down at her hands and blushed.

Cat was going to tease her about the nice shade of red she was sporting, when Billie's dinner tray was brought in and set in front of her. Cat walked over and took the cover off the tray. "Looks good." she said.

"Wwant ssome?" Billie asked?

"No...No, that's all right. I'm really not very hungry." Cat replied.

Billie looked up from her tray and said, "You, not hungry? that's a first!"

Cat's eyes nearly bugged out of her head. "What did you say???" she asked Billie frantically.

"I...I ddon't knnow wwhy I..I ssaid th..that!" Billie answered, obviously shocked herself, at what had come out of her mouth.

Cat's heart was beating a mile a minute as she struggled to calm herself down. "Don't push her, Cat. You'll only scare her again. Let it go..." she told herself.

Cat reached over and opened Billie's milk carton, then unwrapped her straw and put it inside the milk. Placing the carton back on the tray, she said, "Are you nervous about tonight?"

Billie nodded. "Are aaany of them mmine?" Billie asked as she led a spoonful of mashed potatoes to her mouth shakily. Cat smiled at how much better Billie was becoming at fine motor skill coordination after only two days.

Reaching over for Billie's fork and knife, Cat cut up the meat loaf for her into bite size pieces that she could spear with her fork. Putting the utensils down, she sat down in the chair next to the bed and said, "Billie, they are our, children... both of ours. But to answer your question... yes. Our son is biologically yours. The girls are mine."

"I have a sson?" Billie asked.

"And two daughters, Billie." Cat replied.

Billie looked at her and said, "Yes, of ccourse.... Wwhat are their nnames?" she asked, continuing to eat her dinner.

Cat smiled as she thought of their children. Leaning forward so that her forearms rested on her thighs, she began. "Seth is 10 years old. He's a beautiful and sensitive child, Billie. He has corn silk hair and blue, blue yes - like yours. He's our little man. Tara is 8, and very much a free spirit and outspoken. Stubborn as all hell, and quite a tomboy. She has red-gold hair and green eyes like mine. Skylar is the baby. We call her Sky for short... you named her, Billie. She's 4 years old and still very cuddly. She especially likes to curl up in your arms and cuddle into your neck when she's tired. Skylar also had red-gold hair, but her eyes are blue like yours and Seth." Cat finished.

"Wwhere are th..their ffathers, Ccat?" Billie asked.

Cat sighed deeply and sat back in her chair. "Tara's father is dead. Seth and Sky's father is in jail for kidnapping, assault, attempted murder and rape." she explained as Billie's eyes widened with each offense Cat listed.

Billie suddenly paused in mid chew and turned to Cat. "Seth aand Ssky hhave the ssame ffaather?" she asked, obviously confused.

"Yes, Billie. He was your ex husband when I met you." Cat explained. "We had known each other for less than a year when he raped me." she finished, looking down at her hand in her lap. "Skylar is the product of that rape."

Billie watched Cat intently. "I..I'm ssorry." she said.

"Yeah, Well, that's in the past, where it belongs, Billie. I don't dwell on it. If I keep looking back, then I just might stumble on what's in front of me, understand?" she asked.

Billie just nodded and sat back against the pillows.

"All done?" Cat asked.

Again, Billie just nodded as Cat cleaned up her tray and carried it out into the hall. While she was out there, she spotted the speech therapist heading their way. Cat decided to take a walk in the cool evening air while Billie was in therapy, hoping it would give her the strength and renewal to deal with the children's visit.

The hospital grounds were beautiful..., well manicured lawns, colorful arrays of flowers, benches dotting the landscape. Having been cooped up in the hospital almost nonstop for the past two days was very tiring. She filled her lungs with fresh air and let it out slowly. Her thoughts returned to Billie, confined to that bed, and her heart began to break. She promised herself that as soon as Billie was fully recovered, she would plan something special for her love...for their family. Cat looked at her watch and realized that the speech session would be ending soon. Stretching, she rose from the bench she had been sitting on, and headed back inside.

Cat reached Billie's room just as the therapist was leaving. Before she could step into the room though, she spotted her family walking down the hall toward her. The kids saw her, and against all warnings from Grandpa, they took off running toward her and nearly toppled her over onto the floor when they made contact. By the time Cat had the situation under control, Doc had reached them and they entered Billie's room together.

Seth and Tara held Cat's hands, while Doc carried Skylar. As they walked into the room, Billie's head turned toward them.

"Mommy, how come you're wearing that funny hat?" Skylar said.

Billie looked at the small child in Doc's arms and started laughing at the remark. Skylar wiggled out of Doc's arms, slid to the floor and ran into Billie's open arms. As Cat predicted, she curled up into Billie's neck and kissed her on the cheek. "I missed you, Mommy." she said.

Billie wrapped her arms around the child and rested her cheek on the little girl's head. Cat was a ball of mush in the doorway, while Doc pretended that he had something in his eye before he excused himself to check in on some other patients.

Billie raised her head and extended an arm out to the other two children. It didn't take long for Seth and Tara to both climb up onto the bed and into Billie's arms.

Billie sat there, propped up by pillows and surrounded by three squirming children, while Cat stood by the door looking desperately for any sign of recognition from the tall woman. Skylar was curled up in Billie right arm, while Seth sat on her left, leaning against her for support, her arm thrown around his shoulders. Tara straddled her thighs, facing her... hands flying out in all directions as she talked nonstop about the Nintendo game she was currently trying to master.

"...and then I kicked him and he went flying and he jumped up and did a flip, but I super kicked him across the room... and... and then three more guys came out and I had to fight them too, and..." Tara explained, almost whacking Seth across the head with one of her arms.

Seeing that Tara was becoming a little too animated, Cat approached the bed and took her daughter by the shoulders. "Tara, honey, calm down now... you almost clocked your brother one... and if you're not careful, you'll hit Mom too! Why don't you get down for now, okay?" she suggested.

"No.. Llet hher stay. She's ookay, Cat." Billie said.

"Are you sure, Billie?" Cat asked as she watched Tara grin out of the corner of her eye.

Billie nodded and turned her attention back to the children while Cat sat in the chair next to the bed.

"Mom, why do you talk funny?" Tara asked, earning a kick from her brother.

Billie looked down at Seth, "Hey Ssscout... nnone of that, okay?" she said, too absorbed in the interaction between the children to hear Cat gasp at her use of Seth's nickname. Turning back to Tara, she answered the child's question. "Mmy bbrain has fforgottten how tto talk, Tara. I have tto learn hhow aggain." she said.

"Oh." Tara said as she looked at Billie. "Did they cut off all your hair?" she asked.

Billie smiled, "Cat was right... she is quite outspoken!." Billie thought. "I th..think so. I hhaven't llooked yyet." Billie answered. Then, looking at Cat, she said, "Cat?"

Cat came to Billie's rescue. "Oh Yeah... It's all gone. But it'll grow back pretty fast."

Seth leaned forward then looked up at his mother. "All of it?" he asked.

"All of it." Cat answered. "Does that bother you, honey?" she asked Seth.

"A little... I kinda liked Mom's long hair." he said.

"I was kind of partial to it myself." Cat said, drawing a frown from Billie. "But then, I think she's beautiful, no matter how much hair she has." Cat said to her son as she peeked over to see a blush rising up Billie's neck..

"Mommy's bald!" Skylar said giggling.

"You'd bbetter watch it Rrugrrat, or I'll hhave to tickle ya!" Billie said, forming her left hand into a claw. Skylar squealed with delight while Cat sat by totally stunned at Billie's familiarity with the children. "I'll bet she isn't even aware of it!" Cat mused.

Knowing the threat would probably develop into a full blown tickle war, Cat stepped in and put a stop to it before someone got hurt. "Okay, you two... that's enough." she said, taking Skylar out of Billie's arms and resting her on her hip. Billie looked acutely disappointed with that move.

"Hey, don't you have something for Mom?" she asked the three children.

Tara jumped off the bed and ran to the bag Cat had left by the door as Skylar squirmed her way out of Cat's arms to join her sister. "Oh yeah!" she exclaimed. "I almost forgot!"

While his sisters were busy digging their prizes out of the bag, Seth climbed off the bed and walked around to the other side, smoothly slipping onto Cat's lap. Cat wrapped her arms around the child and kissed the side of his head unconsciously as he leaned back into her. Billie watched this interaction with interest.

Moments later, Tara and Skylar walked side by side back to the bed, obviously trying to hide something behind their backs. "Close your eyes, Mom... and no peaking!" Tara warned as Billie obeyed and covered her eyes.

The girls carefully laid the pictures they had colored for their mother, out on her lap.

"Okay, Mommy. Open your eyes." Skylar instructed.

Billie uncovered her eyes and saw the pictures there on her lap. Her eyes immediately filled with tears as she reached down and touched them with a shaky hand.

"You don't like them?" Tara asked, frowning at the sight of the tears. Billie looked over at her daughters. Tara was standing ramrod straight at the edge of the bed, while Skylar was leaning forward, her upper body supported by her forearms on the bed. Both children's eyes were wide with anticipation.

Billie reached out and touched the side of Tara's face lovingly. "Of ccourse I llike them, girls. They're bbeautiful. Th..thank you." she said, opening her arms for the children to climb into. Cat sat there in her chair, holding Seth tight, and fighting back her own tears as Billie cradled her daughters. "I'll aask Mama tto hang them up ffor me on the wwall. Okay?" she said to the children, who shook their heads enthusiastically.

While Billie was thanking her daughters, Cat whispered in Seth's ear, "Don't you have something for Mom?"

Seth whispered back that he wanted to give it to her in private. Cat just nodded and smiled.

Cat could see that Billie was starting to tire. It had been a long and difficult day with therapy, and Billie needed her sleep to be fresh for the challenges that awaited her tomorrow. Rising to her feet, she motioned for the girls to join her. "Come on, girls, Mom's tired. Hugs and kisses, then we've got to get going, okay?" she said.

"Aw Mama!" the girls said together, but obediently climbed off the bed to leave, after depositing big, wet, sloppy kisses and lots of hugs on Billie.

While the girls were saying their good-byes, Cat leaned in to Seth and whispered that he was to stay with Billie as she and the girls went to find Grandpa to take them home.

After several rounds of "I love you's", Cat and the girls had left the room in search of Doc, leaving Seth standing shyly in the middle of the room, alone with Billie.

Billie was about to say something to the child as a searing pain shot through her head, causing her to cry out and grasp her head with both hands.

Seth bolted towards the bed and grabbed Billie's arm. "Mom! Are you all right?" he asked.

Billie held out her hand to calm Seth. Closing her eyes tightly, she rested her head back against the pillows and rubbed her temples. When she opened her eyes, she saw Cat standing there, holding a staff and wearing a brown leather skirt and short green top. Looking down at herself, she realized that she was dressed in a short, dark leather dress with battle armor and knee high boots.

"Do you know him?" asked Cat.

"Yes." she heard herself say. "He's my son."

Billie closed her eyes once more against the pain. When she opened them, she and Seth were sitting beside a river... at least the child looked like Seth, but he had longer hair and wore a band around his head. She was still dressed in battle armor.

"Your mother would be proud of you." she said to the boy.

"You think so?" he asked.

"I know so." Billie answered.

Lowering her head into her hands, Billie massaged the back of her neck. Lifting her head, she opened her eyes and saw Seth lying there in a hospital bed.

"Hey Buddy-Boy, howya doing today, my love?" she greeted him as she entered his room. Seth lay passively in his bed, with his eyes closed. It was times this like that Billie had to keep a stiff upper lip and hope for the best. It was so discouraging some times, to come in here day after day and face such unresponsiveness.

Disturbed with the scene before her, Billie closed her eyes once more.

"Mom?" she heard a voice say next to her.

She opened her eyes and looked at her son. Suddenly a rush of heat rose from the pit of her stomach to her brain. Her eyes bulged out of her head. Reaching over, she took him by the shoulders and looked him over carefully, making him turn around so she could see all of him. When he turned back to face her, she took his face in her hands and pulled him in to place a kiss on his forehead. He pulled back after the kiss, confusion on his face.

"Mom? Are you all right?" he asked.

"Sseth, you're all rright!" she said excitedly. "C'mere, llove." she said opening her arms.

Seth climbed up onto the bed and sat next to Billie as she wrapped her arms around him. "Oh ggods, mmy baby. I ccan't believe yyou're all rright. I tttold those ddoctors you'd wwake up... I ttold them." she said, placing a kiss on top of his head.

"Mom, I woke up four years ago." Seth said.

Billie pulled back and looked at her son. "How ccan that bbe? I just ssaw you in th..the hospital?" she asked.

"But I did." Seth argued. "Mom, I'm 10 years old now."

Billie looked closely at her son. He was six years old when he was hit by the car. This child sitting beside her was definitely older than six.

"Sseth? Oh gods..." Billie said as she lost consciousness.

**********

Cat sat in the chair by the window, Skylar asleep in her arms, Seth and Tara sitting on the floor with their backs leaning up against the wall as they watched Doc examine Billie. After a few moments, Doc turned and sat on the edge of the bed, facing Cat and the kids.

"Daddy, what happened to her?" Cat asked.

"Well, Cait, I'm not really sure, but she may have had a seizure." Doc replied. Then, turning to Seth, he said, "Son, can you tell me what happened with your Mom before she fainted?"

"She was acting kinda weird. She thought I was still six and she was surprised that I was awake. She thought I was still in a coma in the hospital." he explained.

"She's remembering!" Cat said, almost in a whisper.

"Seth, was she upset, or excited or anything like that before she fainted?" Doc asked.

"She was acting real worried and confused... and she looked scared." Seth said. "Grandpa, is she gonna be all right?"

"Yes, she will, Scout. She'll be fine." Doc said. Then to Cat, he added, "I'm going to order an EEG to see if there's any evidence of abnormal electrical activity in the brain, and depending on what that shows, we may need to follow it up with a CAT scan and MRI. The EEG results will tell us a lot." he explained.

"What if it shows normal brain activity?" Cat asked.

"Then it may not be epilepsy, however, I'm not ready to rule that out yet." Doc said.

"But the seizures..." Cat began.

"Daughter, seizures can be triggered by a lot of things, including low blood sugar, fainting, heart disease, stroke, migraines, kinked blood vessels, anxiety, and stress, to name a few. Billie's in pretty good shape, so a few simple tests can rule out most of those causes, but if her memory is indeed returning, extreme stress and anxiety would not be unexpected." he explained. "Look, it's late. I'll order the EEG to be hooked up tonight so we can monitor brain activity while she sleeps, okay?" he said as he leaned down and lifted a sleeping Skylar out of Cat's arms. "Come on little ones... let's go home." he said to Seth and Tara.

Cat kissed her children goodnight, holding Seth just a little longer than normal, trying to assure him that his mother would be all right. Leaning against the door frame, she watched her family walk down the hall until they rounded the corner to the elevators. Letting out a deep sigh, the walked back into the room and sat by Billie's bed. It was going to be a long night.

************************************************************************************************ CHAPTER XII

Cat slept restlessly. Between the hum of the EEG monitors and constantly checking on Billie though out the night, she got very little sleep. She was standing at the window, watching the sun rise when she heard movement come from the direction of Billie's bed. Turning around, her eyes locked with Billie's.

Cat Smiled. "Good Morning, love. You gave us a scare last night. Daddy thinks you may have had a seizure... that explains the wires and monitors. How are you feeling?" she asked, walking over and sitting on the edge of the chair by the bed.

Billie's brow knit together. "Where's Sseth?" she asked abruptly.

She was so tired, both physically and emotionally, that Billie's gruff attitude got to her. Letting herself fall back into the chair, she looked at Billie and said, "I'm fine Billie, thank you for asking....... He's home with Mom and Dad... probably doing what normal 10 year old boys do at 5 am... sleeping!"

Billie's eyes narrowed. "Wwhy didn't you ttell me that hhe wwoke up?" she asked.

"Billie... He woke up four years ago!" Cat said, a little harsher than she intended. She realized that she was starting to lose patience with the whole situation. "Stop it, Cat. It's not her fault... calm down!" she told herself.

Getting to her feet, she started pacing back and forth, her arms crossed at her chest. Billie watched her intently. Finally, she stopped at the foot of Billie's bed.

"Billie." she said. "What do you remember?"

Billie leveled a gaze at her, but remained silent.

"Billie, do you know who you are?" she asked.

"Yes." Billie replied.

"Who are you?" Cat prodded.

"You knnow who I..I aam." Billie answered stubbornly.

"Damn it, Billie! Yes, I know who you are.... I want to know if you know!" Cat said forcefully.

Billie sneered at her and said. "I aam Billie Charland... mmother... llegal assistant... aerrobics instrrructor.!" she shouted back.

"And who am I, Billie?" Cat asked softly.

"I ddon't knnow!... I don't know... Is th.that wwhat you wwant to hhear?" Billie cired. "All I knnow is that yyou have mmy son. I want him back, Cat. He's all I've ggot.... He's aall I've ggot!" she said, breaking down into powerful sobs.

Cat's heart broke for her lover. Taking a huge risk of being rejected, Cat went to Billie and sat on the edge of the bed. Reaching over, she took Billie into her arms and held her as she cried, whispering over and over, "You're not alone, my love, you've got me and the girls as well as Seth... we are a family, Billie, we love you. Let us love you." Cat kissed the side of Billie's head as she held the sobbing woman, rocking her back and forth. Surprisingly, Billie did not pull away.

**********

Doc entered Billie's room about a half hour later and found her sleeping, wrapped inside Cat's arms on the bed. He had to stop at the door to regain his composure at the sight. "Apparently, something major happened here last night." he thought to himself. Walking over to the side of the bed Cat was on, he reached down and squeezed her shoulder gently. She opened her eyes and smiled at her father.

"Good Morning." he said softly, noticing that Billie was still sleeping.

"'Morning, Daddy." Cat said.

"When did this happen?" he asked, referring to the embrace.

"Very early this morning.... we had a bit of a confrontation.... she let me comfort her!" Cat said, smiling broadly.

Doc smiled back. "Good." he said. "You've got about an hour before breakfast arrives... try to sleep, you look like hell, Daughter!"

"I love you too, Daddy." Cat said, snuggling in deeper with Billie as she closed her eyes and drifted off.

Exactly an hour later, breakfast arrived, rousing the two women from their sleep. Billie was startled and embarrassed when she realized that she and Cat were lying entwined together on the bed. She quickly disentangled herself from Cat, who promptly crawled out of the bed and sat in the chair. Neither woman spoke to each other throughout breakfast. Finally, the meal was over and Joseph was on Cat's doorstep. Surprisingly, Laura was with him.

Most of the morning PT session centered around helping Billie relearn how to balance herself in a sitting position. Joseph provided the anchor and the instruction for Billie to pull herself up, while Laura provided the stability she needed not to fall over sideways or backwards while sitting on the edge of the bed. Cat watched from the sidelines, as Billie made significant progress throughout the morning session. While Joseph remained stoically silent, Laura talked incessantly, continuously encouraging Billie through difficult maneuvers, and congratulating her on her successes. By the time the session was over, Billie was sitting up unassisted for several moments, a smile plastered across her face. Cat sat in the chair by the bed, bursting with pride for Billie's accomplishments.

Joseph left the room at the end of the session, leaving Laura to help Billie resettle into bed. Billie was sitting on the edge of the bed, feet dangling over the side, with Laura standing in front of her. Laura looked over to Cat and said, "Cat, Would you come over here please? I need to straighten the bed out while Billie's sitting up, and I need you to keep her balanced while I do that, Okay?"

Cat got up from the chair and walked over to stand in front of Billie. Billie locked eyes with her. "Okay, put your hands out like this, Cat." Laura said, demonstrating by holding her hands at waist height, palms up, in front of Billie. "Good. Okay, now Billie, place your hands in Cat's and hold on." Billie reluctantly did as she was told. Laura left them like this while she took her time straightening out the bed behind Billie. Cat looked over Billie's shoulder at Laura, who just winked at her and continued straightening the bed at a turtle's pace. Cat had all she could do to keep the grin from showing on her face. Finally Laura was done and came back around to help lower Billie onto the bed. Laura headed to the door and waved to the ladies on the way out. "See ya this afternoon, ladies." she said as she left.

Cat turned to pull the covers up around Billie's waist and to adjust the pillows on either side of her.

"No... lleave them." Billie said indicating the pillows. "I nneed to wwork on mmy balance."

Cat smiled and said, "Okay, good idea." Cat returned to adjusting the blankets and the height of her bed. Looking back at Billie, she said, "I was proud of you this morning, Billie. You worked very hard."

"Thanks." she said, allowing a crooked smile to cross her face.

"Good Morning, Ladies!" came a cheery voice from the doorway.

Cat turned and said, "Good Morning, Julie! She's all yours!" Turning to Billie, she said, "Billie, I'm going to find Daddy and talk to him about the EEG tests he collected last night, okay? I'll be back soon."

Billie just nodded.

**********

"Well, Daddy, what do you think?" Cat asked her father, who was bent over he EEG results collected from the previous night.

"Well, Kitten." he said. "See this right here.... and here?" he asked, pointing to a couple of high points on the graph. "They indicate some sort of abnormal electrical activity, but it is not very pronounced. Its hard to tell from this data whether epilepsy is the cause of it. We can take another CAT scan and MRI, but with readings this mild on the EEG, I'm afraid we'll be wasting our time there too. I hate to say it Cait, but we may just have to wait and see if it happens again." he concluded.

"Can't we start her on anti-convulsants now to prevent another seizure?" Cat asked?

"Caitlain, we don't even know if she has epilepsy yet. I'd hate to medicate her for a condition she may not even have. No. Its best to wait." Doc explained.

Cat dropped her chin to her chest and reached a hand up to rub her brow. "Daddy, I hate to see her suffer. I hate not knowing..." she said.

Doc reached over and pulled Cat into his embrace. "C'mere, daughter... You look like you need a hug." he said as she burrowed down deep into her father's shoulder. "I know this has been hard on you, Kitten. She'll get better... I promise." he said.

"I know she will, Daddy." Cat said into his shoulder, "But I want her more than well... I want her back." she said as the tears took over and her body shuddered with release.

**********

Doc took Cat by the hand and led her to the cafeteria before allowing her to return to Billie's room.

"Daddy... I'm really not hungry!" see insisted.

"Caitlain Maureen O'Grady Charland... I won't take no for an answer... do you understand? You haven't eaten enough to keep a bird alive over the past three days. Now, you're going to have lunch with me if I have to hog tie you to the chair. Is that clear?" he lectured.

Cat grinned. "Daddy, I knew I had lost the battle when you used my full name... All right... all right... I'll eat!" she said, throwing her hands up in the air.

Moments later, Cat and Doc were sitting across each other at a small table in the hospital dining room.

"Caitlain, you really do need to eat more." Doc said, eyeing the small salad Cat had chosen.

"Daddy, I'm not hungry... really. This is fine." she said pushing the greens around her plate.

"It might be, if you'd actually eat any of it!" Doc pointed out.

"I'm sorry, Daddy. " Cat said as she put her fork down and pushed her plate away. "I really don't have much of an appetite. I guess I'm just too worried about Billie to eat."

Doc put his own fork down and sat back in his chair. "Spill it, little one." he demanded.

"Huh?" Cat said, looking up at her father.

"I said, spill it. What is it that's keeping you from eating and sleeping?" he asked. Noticing her surprise that he knew her sleeping patterns of late, he added, "Oh, yes, daughter, I have my spies!"

Cat focused on her hands clasped on the table in front of her. "I'm afraid, Daddy" she admitted. "Afraid that she'll never remember me... afraid that I'll lose her... afraid that I'll lose Seth." she said.

"Seth?" Doc asked.

Cat looked up at her father. "Daddy, she is starting to remember. She knows who she is now and she remembers Seth." Cat began.

"That's wonderful news. Caitlain!" Doc exclaimed.

"I hope so, Daddy." she said. Pausing for a moment, she met Doc's eyes and said, "The argument we had this morning was over why I hadn't told her that Seth had come out of his coma." she said. "Daddy, she is the Billie I met four years ago. She doesn't know me. She's living in a time just before we met." Cat explained.

Doc reached over and kissed Cat on the forehead. "Give her time, Kitten. Take this as a good sign... If she's recovered part of her memory, there's a good chance she'll recover the rest." he said. "Keep your chin up, okay?"

"I'll try Daddy." she said, taking his hand and kissing it before he left her to return to his rounds.

**********

Cat dug through her pocket until she came up with enough change to call Jen. After two rings, Jen picked up. "Hello." she said cheerfully.

"Hi, Jen!" Cat said. "Just checking in. I wanted to thank you again for keeping me company last night. I really appreciate it." she added.

"All right, Cat, what's up?" Jen asked.

"What do you mean?" Cat answered.

"Spill it, Girlfriend." Jen demanded.

"Damn it, Jen. You know me too well for my own good." Cat exclaimed. "All right, all right. The visit with the kids was great, Jen. You should have seen how Billie was with them... like nothing was wrong. Glimpses of the old Billie kept showing through, but I don't think she realized it." Cat said.

"Cat! That's wonderful. You were worried that it would be tough on the kids." Jen replied.

"Well, I've only told you part of it Jen. I left Seth with her while the girls and I went to find Daddy to take them home, and Billie had a spell. Apparently, memories of him from four years ago when he was still in the hospital, came flooding back. She passed out on him." Cat explained.

"Oh my god, poor Seth." Jen exclaimed. "Is he all right? Is Billie all right?" she asked.

"Yes to both questions." Cat answered. "The good news, is that she now knows who she and Seth are. The bad news, is that her memories stop when he was hospitalized at six years old." Cat added.

"Before or after she met you?" Jen asked.

"Before." Cat answered.

Jen paused for a moment, trying to think of something positive to say to her friend. "Well, it's a start, Cat. Keep your chin up, okay, love? I have a good feeling about this. It'll work out... I know it will."

"Jen, what would I do without you? I can't thank you enough for your support." Cat said.

"No thanks are necessary, Cat. You know how I feel about you and Billie. I'm only glad I can help." Jen answered.

"Well, I've got to go. Billie's counseling session begins soon, and I don't want to miss it." Cat said.

"Okay, Cat. I'll see you soon." Jen said. "Kiss the Big Guy for me, okay?"

"I will, Jen. See you later." Cat said, hanging up the phone.

"One more phone call." Cat thought and she slipped the coins into the slot.

"Hello, Art?" she said into the phone.

"Cat! Cat, is Billie all right?" Art asked cautiously.

"Art, she's fine. She's starting to remember. She knows who she is now, and who Seth is, but her memories stop just before she and I met. In her mind, she is still a legal assistant. If you come to visit her, she'll probably recognize you, but she won't remember that she's a practicing lawyer. Just keep that in mind, okay?"

"She must be pretty confused, huh?" he commented.

"Yes she is." Cat replied.

"Any idea when she'll be going home?" he asked.

"I'd say in another week or so." Cat replied.

"Maybe it would be better if Marge and I waited until she goes home to visit, Cat. That will be one less thing she'll have to deal with in the hospital. What do you think?" he asked.

"I think that's a good idea, Art. I'll tell her I spoke with you and that you'll see her soon." Cat said.

**********

Cat arrived back at Billie's room just in time for her session with Dr. O'Brien. When she got there, she was surprised to see Laura instead. "Hi." Cat said as she walked into the room. "Where's Dr. O'Brien?" she asked.

Laura turned to look over her shoulder at Cat. "Hiya Cat!" she said cheerfully. "No sessions on Saturday.... Doc's on call though, if you'd like us to call her?" Laura offered.

"No... No, that's all right.... Is it really Saturday?" Cat asked as she circled around the bed to watch Laura exercise Billie's arms and legs.

"That it is, Red." she said to Cat. "Pretty easy to lose track of time around here, isn't it?" she asked.

"Oh Yeah." Cat answered. "What are you doing?" she asked Laura.

"Yeah, wwhat are you ddoing?" Billie echoed from the bed.

Laura looked at Billie with raised eyebrows. "So... You can talk!" she commented. "I was beginning to wonder when you didn't say a word in this morning's session." she teased. "...but to answer your question, I am warming your muscles up... we have a pretty taxing workout planned for this afternoon." she explained.

"Is Ivan the Tterrible ggoing to be here?" Billie asked.

Laura smiled. "You must mean Joseph, huh? Yeah, he'll be here." she answered, chuckling at Billie's nickname for her colleague.

"So what's so taxing about this afternoon's session, Laura?" Cat asked.

"Can you say, 'On Your Feet, Soldier'?" Laura asked.

Cat and Billie looked at her with identical expressions... eyes bugging out, mouths wide open, eyebrows raised into their hairlines.

Laura looked at them, and in her best Mae West voice, said, "Close your mouth, you're catch'in flies!", before she broke down laughing.

**********

After the session, Cat thoroughlly understood why Billie called Joseph, Ivan the Terrible. The man was brutal in his insistence that Billie stand on her feet.

After several failed attempts, Billie was ready to give up. "Oh no you don't." Joseph said bending down to invade Billie's personal space. "No quitting! You don't understand... my patients don't quit on me." he stated.

"Billie grabbed his shirt front and pulled him down nose to nose with her. "You don't understand!" she said. "It hhurts! I ccan't do it!"

"Yes you can!" he said, grabbing her shoulders and pulling her up into a standing position. "Now DO IT!" he said sternly into her face as he released her arms.

Billie was so angry with him, that she didn't realize she was indeed standing. Laura had a firm grasp on the thick belt they had placed around her middle to provide convenient hand holds while allowing the patient to maintain control and balance. Cat was standing against the wall by the door, hands clasped over her mouth in surprise.

Billie scowled into his face. The smirk he was wearing only made her angrier. "You bastard." she said to him.

Joseph grinned and took a step back. "I've been called worse." he said as his eyes drew her attention to the fact that she was standing on her own.

Suddenly realizing that no one was holding her up, Billie wavered, her knees buckling.

"I've got you." Laura said as she wrapped an arm around Billie's waist and gently lowered her to a sitting position on the bed.

Billie looked from Laura to Joseph, to Cat, and back to Joseph, her eyes wide with awe at what she had just accomplished. Her eyes misted over as she broke into a grin. "I did it." she said. "I rreally ddid it!!"

Joseph walked over and bent down so that he was once again invading her personal space. "Like I said... My patients don't quit on me!" Standing back up, he smiled and said, "Tomorrow, we start the real fun. See you then." With that, he was gone.

"Okay, Miss Show Off, let's get you back into bed and rub those sore muscles down, okay? Cat, you wanna give me a hand?" Laura asked.

Cat quickly crossed the room to Billie's bed and helped Laura guide her back onto a prone position. Cat sat in the chair next to the bed and watched Laura intently.

Cat was so preoccupied with the massage, that she didn't feel Billie's hand reach over and take her own, until contact was made, startling her. Her eyes flew to Billie's face where the fear of rejection was evident. She smiled and accepted Billie's hand, grasping it tightly.

Laura, pretenting to concentrate completely on the massage, spared a glance at the ladies and let a lazy smile cross her face.

**********

"Cat, You nneed to ggo home... see the kkids... get ssome ssleep." Billie insisted.

Cat paced back and forth across the room. "Damn it... Why did I have to fall asleep in the chair during her speech therapy?" she mused.

"No Billie. I won't leave you!" Cat said.

"Ccat... I'll bbe alrright. Go home!" Billie said again.

"No." she said again, sitting on the edge of her own cot, and crossing her arms across her chest.

"Please?" Billie pleaded.

"No!" Cat said loudly. "No! No! No! No! No!... Got it?" she asked.

Billie lowered her chin to her chest and took a deep breath. Looking back up at Cat, she said, "I don't wwant you to gget sick, Cat. At least lay ddown and gget some ssleep." she said.

Cat looked at her love through drooping eyelids. Closing her eyes, she nodded her agreement, then laid down on her cot. She was asleep in seconds.

Billie rested her head against her pillows and looked at the ceiling. "Who are you, Cat?" she mused to herself. "Why can't I remember you?" Finally, exhausted from a day filled with therapy, she felt her own lids grow heavy as she too drifted off to sleep.

************************************************************************************************ CHAPTER XIII

Billie woke up the next morning feeling refreshed. Looking over at the cot set up on the other side of the room, she saw Cat laying on her side, her left hand tucked under her cheek, the blanket pulled up to her neck. Red-gold hair spilled out over her face. Billie had the overwhelming urge to brush her hair back and place a kiss on her brow. "Now where did that come from?" she asked herself, startled at the intensity of the emotion. Billie closed her eyes and took a deep breath to calm her reapidly beating heart. When she opened them again, she was staring directly into two of the greenest pools she had ever seen.

"Cat!" she said, unnerved by the red head's intense stare.

Cat reached up and brushed the hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear. "Good Morning." she said, smiling at Billie.

"You llook better this mmorning." Billie commented. "Looked like hell llast night."

Cat sat up on the edge of the bed and combed her hair with her fingers. "Why does everyone keep saying that!" she said, exasperated.

"Because its ttrue. You're nnot taking ccare of yoursself, Cat. I wwant you to go home ttonight... eat, sleep in a real bbed. Okay?" Billie said.

Cat looked up at Billie and saw real concern in her eyes, melting her heart into a puddle at her feet. "Dare I hope?" Cat thought.

"I'll think about it Billie. I do need to check in at work to arrange another week's vacation. Let's see how things go today, okay?" Cat compromised.

"All right." Billie agreed, smiling.

"Gods, how I miss that, Billie." Cat said without thinking.

"Miss what?" Billie asked.

"Your smile... It is so beautiful.... You are so beautiful." Cat said.

Billie blushed and looked down at her hands.

Cat walked over to the bed and sat on the edge facing Billie. She reached out a hand to cup the side of Billie's face. "Now I've gone and embarassed you, love. I'm sorry." Cat said.

Billie looked up at Cat with uncertainty in her eyes. Taking a deep breath, she forced a crooked smile and said, "You ggot a thing for bbald women, Ccat?"

"Only if they have eyes the color of the sky on a sunny spring morning. Know where I can find someone like that?" she asked.

Billie looked down and blushed again.

Cat smiled, then turned her head sharply as Billie's breakfast was brought into the room. Cat let her chin drop to her chest. "Why does this always happen?" she thought. "Just when we're warming up to each other?"

Cat's thoughts were interrupted by Billie's hand on her arm. "Help mme to sit up, Cat." she said.

Cat looked at Billie intently. "Billie, do you think you should?" she asked.

"Yes. I'm ssick of eating lying ddown." Billie replied as she rolled onto her side and maneuvered herself up onto her elbow, pushing her body upright.

Standing up, Cat grabbed Billie's ankles and swung them over the side of the bed as Billie reached over to grasp the edge of the bed with her free hand to pull herself into a seated position. Billie placed her hands on the bed to balance herself while Cat moved the bed tray over in front of her, locking the wheels so that it wouldn't roll away if Billie leaned on it. Billie grinned at her as she reached for her fork and began eating her breakfast.

**********

Laura was surprised to see Billie sitting up when she arrived promptly at 9 am, pushing a wheelchair in front of her. "Good Morning." she said to Cat and Billie. She positioned the wheelchair close to the bed and locked the wheels, then stood in front of Billie, hands on her hips, and said, "Pretty proud of yourself, huh?" she said to Billie who was grinning from ear to ear.

"Yep!" Billie replied, glancing over at Cat, who was also smiling.

"You ready for a workout, Missy?" Laura said to Billie, reaching her hands out for Billie to grasp.

Billie put her hands in Laura's and looked up at her expectantly.

"Okay, now shift your weight forward and press your heels into the floor... that's it. I've got you... I won't let you fall." Laura said as Billie slowly rose to her full height.

Laura reached around Billie's waist and supported her as she turned her body sideways and slowy lowered her into the chair. "Comfy?" she asked after adjusting the footrests.

Billie just nodded, obviously nervous about the therapy that was to come.

Laura walked around to the back of the chair and unlocked the wheels. Looking over to Cat, she said, "You coming?"

Cat nodded her head and followed them out of the room.

**********

Laura wheeled Billie into the Physical Therapy room and parked her chair directly in front of the parallel bars, locking the wheels in place.

Joseph came in at that point and approached Billie. He stood in front of her with his arms crossed in front of his chest. "Good Morning, Billie." he said. "You're not going to quit on me today, are you?" he said smugly.

Cat shot daggers at him with her eyes, while Billie accepted his challenge and issued one of her own. "I'd like to ssee you try to mmake me." she said without breaking eye contact with the arrogant man.

"You're on." he said. Taking a step backward, he placed one of his hands on each bar and said. "Reach out and grab the bars, Billie."

Billie did as she was told, keeping her eyes on Joseph.

"Now pull yourself up out of the chair." he instructed.

Billie grasped the bars tightly and pulled with all her might as she pushed her heels into the floor. Her face contorted with the effort, a sweat breaking out on her brow. Half way up, her strength gave out and she fell back into the chair, which Laura had maintained at a close distance behind her.

Her chest heaved with exhaustion and anger as she made her second and third attempts. Over and over, she failed and fell back into the chair. Joseph just stood there, a hand on each bar, leaning forward slightly, and watching her intently. Cat was standing nearby, feeling Billie's humiliation and pain with each failed attempt.

In the midst of the fourth attempt, Billie was drenched in sweat, muscles quivering, and tears running down her cheeks.

"Help her!" Cat yelled at Joseph, unable to take it any more.

Joseph turned to her and yelled, "I warned you before about interfering... Now either shut up or get out!"

Billie was pissed. Pulling as hard as she could, she summoned all her anger and pulled herself to her feet, coming face to face with Joseph. Looking him in the eyes, she said, "Don't you EVER ttalk to her llike that aggain... Got it!"

Joseph just grinned and said, "Congratulations, Billie. You did it."

Billie was standing there, knuckles white from holding on so tightly to the bars, sweat covering her face and neck, eyes bulging out of her face. Her entire body started to tremble as Laura reached forward under Billie's arms and helped to lower her back into the chair. Billie looked over at Cat who had backed up against the wall in reaction to Joseph's outburst. Tears were running down her face. Billie smiled at her, causing Cat to smile back through her tears.

As incredible as it was to believe, an entire hour had passed during Billie's attempts to stand. Billie was exhausted and weak as Laura wheeled her back to her room and helped her into the straight backed chair by the window. Shaking from exertion and shock, Laura took a blanket from the closet and wrapped it around Billie's legs.

Dropping to one knee in front of Billie, Laura tucked the blanket in around her legs and feet. Before rising, she squeezed one of Billie's knees and said, "You did real good this morning, Billie. Better than expected, actually."

Cat, who had been sitting on the edge of Billie's bed during this exchange, jumped down and approached Laura. "Laura, why does he antagonize her so?" Cat asked.

"Joseph's methods seem a little unorthodox, Cat, but he does produce results." Laura said.

"But I just want to slap that smug look off his face!" Cat blurted out, causing Billie to smile.

Laura laughed. "Oh, girl, I know what you mean. Sometimes he even gets to me, but I've learned to butt out. Like I said, he gets results... he's good at what he does."

"He won't be doing it mmuch llonger if he attacks Cat aggain." Billie warned, drawing a smile from Cat.

Laura chuckled. "Something tells me, Joseph has met his match with you, Billie." she said. Rising to her feet, she added, "Okay... your OT should be here soon. I'll be back after your lunch to help you back to bed. You should take a nap before this afternoon's session. Okay?"

"All right. Thanks Laura." Billie said as Laura left the room.

**********

Billie's OT session went exceptionally well, prompting the therapist to comment that she wouldn't need many more before her body would be ready to take over and train itself.

During the therapy, Cat had curled up on Billie's bed and had fallen asleep. Billie watched her with interest as she waited for her lunch to arrive. There was something so familiar about her, yet so foreign. Billie was feeling more and more comfortable with her as time went on. It had been a couple of days since anyone had mentioned their marriage, but it was always a nagging thought at the back of her mind. "She said I was beautiful." Billie mused. "I can feel her love for me... why can't I return that love? Who are you Cat? Who are you?"

Billie pondered these questions as her lunch arrived. Without Cat to wait on her, Billie found it a little more of a challenge, but soon, she had managed to open her milk carton by herself and spread the mayonnaise on her turkey sandwich without making too much of a mess. Finally, lunch was over and Laura arrived to help her into bed.

Laura wheeled the chair over to her and locked the brakes. Holding her hands out to Billie, she anchored herself as Billie held on and struggled to her feet. Turning her body, she slowly lowered herself into the chair with Laura's help. "You're getting pretty good at that, girl." Laura said as she wheeled her over to the bed.

Laura reached out to shake Cat awake so that Billie could take her nap.

"No... leave her." Billie said.

Laura locked eyes with Billie and smiled. "You sure?" she asked.

"Yes." Billie answered.

"Okay... up you go then." she said, helping Billie to her feet and gently lowering her to the bed. "Pleasant dreams, Billie." Laura said as she left the room.

Billie laid back carefully, so as to not wake Cat. Cat's back was to her, her red-gold hair spilling over onto Billie's pillow. Billie gently raised a lock of hair and held it in her fingers. "So soft..." she thought as the lock fell through her fingers. Billie rolled onto her side and spooned behind Cat, throwing her arm around Cat's middle. Moments later, she joined her in the arms of Morpheus.

**********

Cat shifted in her sleep and felt a familiar weight around her waist. Rolling part way over, she peaked over her shoulder and realized that she was wrapped in Billie's arms. Her heart flip flopped in her chest. "Oh Gods.... oh gods!" she thought, her heart visibly beating through her chest. "Is this really happening?" She shifted a little more, causing Billie's arm to tighten around her and pull her closer. "Oh yeah... this is definitely happening." Cat decided happily as she snuggled into the embrace and allowed herself to feel the warmth and comfort from Billie's arms before falling back to sleep.

"Ladies.... Ladies.... Time to get up... wakey, wakey!" Laura said as she shook Billie's arm. She almost hated to wake them, they looked so cute lying there together.

"Huh?" Billie said as she rolled over onto her back. When she pulled away from Cat, she felt a tremendous sense of loss and separation. Confused and disoriented, she looked back at Cat, who was still sleeping, then back at Laura, who was watching her intently.

"You okay?" Laura asked her.

Billie nodded. "Yeah, I tthink so". she replied, glancing again at Cat.

"Should we wake her?" Laura said.

"If we don't, she'll be really mmad." Billie answered.

"Do you want to do the honors, or shall I?" Laura asked.

"I'll ddo it." Billie said. "She's really hhard to gget up ssometimes." "Now how did I know that?" Billie thought as she reached over and shook Cat, several times before she finally allowed herself to be roused from sleep.

"Whaa...?" Cat said before she realized where she was. "Oh... is it time to go?" she asked Laura, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes.

"Yes Ma'am." Laura answered, moving the wheelchair within Billie's reach. "Come on, Billie.... Ivan will get impatient if we're late." she joked, helping Billie to her feet and into the chair. Soon, the trio were on their way to PT.

**********

"Okay, Billie... Now that you've mastered pulling yourself up out of the chair, let's see if you can take a few steps." Joseph said.

Billie was standing between the parallel bars, with Joseph in front of her, and Laura standing behind her, a hand firmly on the belt around Billie's waist. Once again, Cat was relegated to the sidelines, with strict orders from Joseph to keep her mouth shut.

"Try to move one of your feet, Billie." Joseph instructed.

Billie felt like her feet were glued to the floor. Using her hands for support, and Laura's touch on the belt for balance, Billie tried desperately to move her right foot forward. Suddenly her knees gave out and she almost went down, save for Laura's strong arms around her waist. Helping her back to her feet, Laura whispered words of encouragement in Billie's ear as she regained her balance. This process was repeated for nearly an hour, with Billie stumbling several times.

Angry, humiliated and frustrated beyond all comprehension, she lashed out at Joseph, and even at Laura, as tears streaked down her face. Cat was unable to tolerate the pain and anguish her wife was in, fleeing the session long before it was over. Finally, when he felt Billie was on the verge of giving up, Joseph assisted her with simulated leg movements, and managed to help her take several steps through the length of the parallel bars where her wheel chair was waiting.

Helping her into the chair, Laura wheeled her back to her room, where Cat was waiting, staring out the window. Laura helped her into bed and massaged the knots out of her tired muscles, before wishing them a good evening and leaving them alone.

"I'm sorry, Billie." Cat said from the window.

"For what?" Billie replied.

Cat turned around. "For deserting you in there. I'm sorry, but I couldn't take it any more. My heart was breaking for you." she explained.

"I understand." Billie said. "I wwish I could have ggone with you." she added.

Cat approached the bed. "Do you still want me to go home tonight?" she asked Billie.

"Billie looked down at her hands, and then at Cat. "No." was all she said.

Cat smiled and nodded her head.

"Cat?" Billie asked, looking up at Cat.

"Yes?" She answered.

"We're married, right?" Billie said.

"Yes we are. You fought very hard in court for the right to make it legal." Cat explained.

"Will you tell me about it... about us.. our life?" Billie asked.

Cat reached down and took Billie's hand in her own. Raising it to her lips, she kissed her knuckles, then held it close to her heart. "Of course I will, love... of course I will." she replied.

Billie moved over onto her side to make room for Cat to lay next to her on the bed. Cat climbed in and laid facing Billie so that their faces were only inches part, and began her tale... "Once upon a time, there was this beautiful dark haired aerobics instructor, and this very clumsy red head......"

THE END (or maybe the beginning? Look for more in "Unchained Memories")

NOTE TO READERS: This story is IMMEDIATELY followed by "Unchained Memories". I generally do not post incomplete stories, and I apologize to anyone who was miffed by the abrupt end to "While I Was Gone", but the document was becoming quite a monster in size, so I decided to split it into two stories. However... I did wait until both documents were finished before posting them together,... so forgive me... please? kd :-)

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NOTE TO READERS:

Much of the information on Epilepsy was found in a wonderful web site maintained by Andrew Patrick (andrew@calvin.dgbt.doc.ca), called Frequently Asked Questions about Epilepsy. It is located on the Net at: http://debra.dgbt.doc.ca/~andrew/epilepsy/.

Information on Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) and Acquired Brian Injury (ABI) can be found at John & Clara's TBI/ABI Related Sites and Info, located at http://tbinet.org/jlyon/tbi.html. This site contains a wonderful index on TBI, including information on support groups, mailing lists, epilepsy and seizures, education, legal issues and medication.