~ The Infamous Journal Entries of Casey Jenkins ~
Crazy Thoughts
by Kiki Hart

As of right now, I don't plan on any really bad violence, maybe some sexual situations in the future entries and some really funny material. I am just going to let Casey talk to me and write down what she says. Wherever my Muse takes me, so to speak. J

Some topics may be controversial, please don't flame me about them, I know not everyone is going to agree, but if you want to discuss it with me? Feel Free to do so! If you don't agree with it, then you should stop reading it.

Casey has come out of my subconscious to say the things not everyone wants to say out loud. This is my first time, so be nice! Feedback is ALWAYS welcome at khart369@yahoo.com and if you have something that you want Casey to talk about then send that on too, and I will see what I can do.

Journal Entry #1
I am a twenty-five year old and was just given this journal for a gag gift from a friend of mine. She seems to think that rather than ranting about everything from the moon to the sun, I should write my rants down, as they can be very confusing and exhausting to everyone around me. *shrugs* I don't see her reasoning behind it, but ? I ? I guess I am a very opinionated person and I surround myself with carefree people. So a part of me sees how it could be annoying.

So here I am writing in my 'new' journal and my latest rant is about grocery store shopping trips and how it affects the mind and spirit. Interesting, yes I know. Crazy, yes I realize that even more so, but my opinions on this matter just fascinate me. Oh and I should put in here that I write what I am doing while I am thinking of what I am writing. If you could understand that one. Ha! On the offhand chance anyone should ever get his or her hands on 'my' journal. So here goes nothing! *smiles*

"Crazy Thoughts"

I went to the grocery store over the weekend. Now, that is not what surprised me, but I am going to start at the beginning so you know where I am coming from with my surprise. The very beginning?

You are born. *grins* Then you get to have your first experience going to the grocery store with your parents, one or both, doesn't matter. It was always a great joy each time you would get to go. Well, once you were old enough to be excited about going someplace, anyplace for that matter, except the Doctor's office (that is another rant all in itself.) But you always went with 'someone' and got a small say over what you might want, but could still always be turned down with a 'No' from Mom or Dad. (There is one exception to this and that is if you got allowance, although Mom and Dad still had a habit of saying 'No' even then.)

Then you grow into your teenage years, and you get a job (what a concept!) and then you get your own money (WooHoo!). And for the most part you can spend it on whatever you want. Well, that is until you get a car and you have to either pay for part of the car or the insurance on it. (Been there done that, regarding the insurance payment demand from the parentals.) So, then you only have 'some' of your own money. You might go to the grocery store to get? let's see, what did I get with that money. I remember getting a soda and a snack (junk food, of course *grins*) or a pack of gum or a magazine (of course for the latest fashion and make-up tips, or in my case to secretly look at the models and famous beautiful women *smirks*). That's at the grocery store but also, music CD's, movies, clothes that you don't need, (books, in my case) so basically anything that strikes your fancy at that time is bought with that money. Either way that money is spent on things that are wants not needs.

Okay, so soon you grow into young adulthood. It could be a number of things that would put you on your own completely, either by going to college and living in a dorm, or living on your own and not going to college. *shrugs* So, you start going to the grocery store by yourself. Now, you can't only get junk food, well I suppose some people could and would, but most are not going to. You are going to buy foods that you can well, afford (no brainer there) and also that are going to make good meals, like Ramen noodles, lots and lots of Ramen noodles. *grins*

So, along the way of life... you have been going to the grocery store with someone, and without someone now. Easy enough experiences there. THEN comes the long-term partner that moves in with you, or vice versa. This kind of grocery shopping is different than anything you have ever experienced. You find that most of the time you have to go together because one of you always gets the other one the wrong items when going solo. *sigh* Yes, I have been there. That is what started my whole train of thought here. Two years worth of this experience here that I am talking about, and each time was always an ? interesting would be the word to use, experience. Especially, oh yes, especially if that person is as picky as mine was. Trust me here.

Okay long-term, a year for most, or more as in my case... that's a lot of grocery trips! You get into a habit and a cycle. It becomes old hat! Then you break up. (Dum, dum, dum! Music that means you are d-o-o-m-e-d in the scary movies) Now the reason for this long in-depth look at a person's lifeline of grocery shopping is because when that break-up happens.... *eye roll* Besides the trauma of the break-up, then you find yourself going through all kinds of stuff that used to be no problem solo. Grocery store shopping being one of them rated in the middle, but certainly not on the bottom of the trauma list! Is it not the weirdest experience after all that time, to go grocery shopping for one again?

It is! It happened to me, just this last time! Of course that is what started this entire rant as I see I have already mentioned. I do that a lot? repeat myself. Yes my friends find that annoying as well. *shrugs* Oh well, getting off the topic. I found myself walking the aisles and thinking about what I 'usually' got. I would pick up stuff that I don't even eat, but that my partner, EX-partner, would always pick up. Some habits are hard to break, not to mention, the habits that you think will stick around forever. *sigh* Very weird feeling indeed, *shakes her head after re-reading this* Now you know why I titled this entry "Crazy Thoughts" and I even underlined it neatly, too. J

Until next time, dear journal, be good. J

Continued in Part 2

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