~ By Firelight ~
by Lariel


General Disclaimer: Xena and Gabrielle are characters owned by MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. No copyright infringement is intended, and no profit gained by this piece of fanfic.

Violence/Love: Nothing physical, just lots of intense emotions as our favourite warrior settles back for an average night with everyone's ideal travelling companion.

Write Me Pleeeeaase: Let me know someone reads this stuff! I don't bite (unless you want me too) and I might even write back ...... so make a poor girl very happy and gimme some feedback! But be nice - otherwise I'll set Xena on you. Or if you're really awful, I'll send our favourite bard round. Or maybe I'll inflict the ultimate punishment, and just keep her for myself....

Lariel_a@Hotmail.com


She's had a tough day. She tries to hide it from me; thinks I don't notice the secret stretching of aching muscles, the worried circles stretched tightly around tired eyes, and the bruises and cuts which pattern her body. Marks caught fighting at my side, protecting my back; battle scars of which she is proud, branding in flesh and blood her place at my side. And the weariness in her face and the fear in her eyes that harm would come to either one of us. But she never could hide what she is feeling - her expressive face speaks so clearly and I can always tell.

Why does she try to hide it from me? Doesn't she trust me by now? She still thinks I might send her home, that there's no room in my warrior life for an innocent village girl who's always getting into trouble. Like I could send her away now! She's burrowed into my heart as deeply as a barbed arrow into soft flesh, and it would tear me apart if she were to leave me now. I couldn't imagine my life without her. Without her, there is no life. Only a soulless existence.

She has me on a pedestal and feels she has to prove herself worthy of me, that she's tough enough to stay. She says she wants so much to be like me. I wonder why? She is far stronger than I will ever be - not physically, no; but in ways which are so much more significant. She touches people so deeply; I see it all the time as we travel. She has taught me lessons about life and love that I had never hoped to learn - I thought my time had gone, but she has brought it all back and given me a second chance. I owe her so much and I can never repay her. I want so much to be like her.

Again, I glance at her as she sits quietly at the fire's edge while I am pretending to polish my armour. The firelight casts a gentle glow, burnishing her skin and turning her hair into golden threads of silk. A dreamy expression softens her eyes as she stares absently into the dancing flames and I smile as I recognise the familiar expressions fleeting across her face. She always does this when she's working on a story, experiencing each emotion as she fixes it in words onto parchment. She smiles, her eyes alight, and I am struck again by her beauty and her gentleness. She is one of the most beautiful people I have ever known. Not just in the physical sense - no, to me she is so much more than just flesh and blood. She is the candle in the window that guides me home on a dark winter's eve.

The moon is climbing across the sky. She will write all night if I let her, and yawn and struggle all through the next morning. When we first began travelling together, when the night time fears would nip her, I noticed how my steady sharpening soothed her and now, I pick up my sword and begin my nightly ritual. Her head quickly droops and her eyelids close over vibrant eyes as I give her my gift. I lull her to sleep.

The scroll drops from her hands as she accepts my gift as she does every night, and I quietly cover her with her blanket. I tenderly brush the loose strands of hair from her brow as I allow myself my nightly treat; I kiss her and thank her for giving me another day. One day I'll tell her what she means to me......but not yet. I could never find the words to do her justice. For now, I just hug my love, my respect and my awe around me, wrapping myself in her comforting warmth. And I thank the Gods again for sending her to me. Maybe one day, I'll find the courage to tell her.

"Goodnight Gabrielle. Sweet dreams." I stretch out beside her, and hope as I do every night that her presence will be enough to chase the shadows in my nightmares. And as I have done for every night for the past eight months, I look forward to tomorrow.

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This was one of the first pieces I ever wrote, and is one of my more serious attempts. It's the first in a series I'm working on - the others will be posted soon. All constructive comments gratefully received.

Lariel_a@Hotmail.com



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