They say that the road to redemption is fraught with stark, rocky terrain and darkened paths that those with any sense dare not tread. No wonder it took me many years to finally trample that road. I looked for it at every turn, down every dark alleyway, in the ruins I helped to create, in the faces of the poor that I crushed. But it eluded my grasp, and the search itself became an exercise in futility. It mocked my every attempt to grasp it, until I finally stopped altogether. The road to destruction was an easier path to follow, so I did.

I was a monstrous, hideous aberration, barely human, and I reveled in my barbarous nature. Men quaked at the mere mention of my name, women feared for their daughters, and children thought me a nightmare-like the ones you have on a cold, windy night, when the moon is full.

Guilt was my constant companion; it followed me wherever I went. I heard it laugh every time I plunged my sword into an innocent victim. It snickered while I watched my men plunder and rape the land. It's evil cackle echoed in the hills on the hot nights when the cries of my victims rose up from the bowels of hades itself.

Redemption. I was ready for it, however, having spent most of my adult life doing things that even I could never forgive, I thought it beyond my grasp. I thought I might find it in my own homeland, but, alas, this was not to be. So I ditched my armor and weapons in a field, donned a thick linen garment and cloak, and wandered the land like an itinerant nomad. After awhile I easily resembled those I perpetuated violence upon-a vacant stare, lost in the wreck of my memories. I lived a peripatetic life-I scrounged in trashcans, hid in caves, and howled at the moon. I begged for food in places that even animals avoided.

I was still full of rage, and self-hatred, but I was tired. I wandered for so long that suddenly fall became spring without me realizing it. Until one day, when a bone weariness caught me in its grasp, and I had to finally take my rest.

It was a typical seaside village. Not really any bigger than the one I grew up in, but for an agora that hugged the shore and an impressive fishing pier that accommodated about twenty mid-size boats. The main road into the village was lined with the typical small markets, clothes stores, bars, and a few liveries. There were a few temples on a road that led away from the shore, and beyond that, a row of small houses that disappeared behind a hill, where I realized most of the dwellings must have been-safely protected against any storms that rose off the sea. I figured that the people who lived in this place lived very simple and quiet lives.

As I walked down the roadway and past the first inns, with their aromas of hot food, I realized I was hungry. I hadn't eaten in two days, and I probably stank as well. With no money or means of acquiring food I walked the road that led to the temples and hoped there was a Theseion there, like the one in Athens, where the poor were taken care of. I needn't have worried, there was, and it looked exactly like the one I remembered in Athens, Doric, peripteral, with a pronaos and opisthodomos.

I destroyed the one in Athens, and the guilt that came with that memory almost kept me from entering the one in this small town. But I was too famished to care at this point. There were two food stalls erected at the bottom of the steps that led up to the temple proper, one was offering meat, the other, vegetables. I stepped to the end of the small line of people. It was late in the afternoon and most people had already taken their midday meal.

As I stood at the back of the line a small boy turned to me and frowned. "You need a bath, lady."

I offered the boy a cynical smile. "Yeah, well, you and me both, kid."

His mother turned to say something to me but when she caught my glaring eyes she quickly turned around and gathered the boy closer to her. I realized I could still do it; still intimidate people with just a look. I caught myself then, wanting to apologize and strangle at the same time.

I wordlessly accepted the small plate of food offered to me and sat down on the temple steps. They didn't offer me a fork so I picked up the food with dirty fingers and ate it like a starving animal. I looked up to find that a man, dressed in dirty rags, was watching me as he ate.

My eyes narrowed and I stilled my movements. "What the fuck are you looking at?"

He shrank away and lowered his eyes. "Nothing…nothing, I'm sorry. Its just that, well, you look familiar."

I frowned. "No, no I don't."

The man nodded and turned his back to me, apparently agreeing with my astute appraisal. He scooted further away from me and finished his meal.

An older woman, with blonde hair streaked with gray, came up to me an offered me a small loaf of bread from the basket she was carrying. I snatched it up without speaking and dipped it into the grease left on my plate and ate like there was no tomorrow. My hunger for food was temporarily satisfied.

I looked up again when I finished and noticed that the woman who had offered me the bread was watching me while conversing with the vegetable cook. When she noticed my glance she put down her basket and approached me.

"Hello, my name is Hecuba."

I wasn't in the mood for conversation. "So what."

She smiled at me then, and sat down on the step I was sitting on. "You look like a woman who could use a clean place to rest."

"I don't care what you think, leave me alone."

She regarded me for a few moments, and then did something that no one in my army had ever dared to do. She reached over and lightly touched my shoulder. "We own the inn at the end of that street, the two storey one. Come by after you eat." With those words she stood and walked away from me.

I don't know how long I sat on those temple steps, but when I looked up, the sun was setting on the horizon and it was starting to get a bit chilly. There were no stables to break into and sleep in, and I didn't feel like sleeping inside the temple, so I got up and headed for the two storey inn at the end of the street.

Looking back, I don't know why I made that decision. The temple would have been comfortable, but I also knew I didn't like sleeping in the company of other people, and I wondered what that woman really wanted from me. I knew not to enter by the front entrance, so I walked to the back of the inn and looked into a small, yet clean, kitchen. The woman who earlier approached me was in there talking to a girl with dark hair and pretty eyes.

I cleared my throat and the woman turned and looked at me. I think that she was a little surprised that I accepted her invitation, but she smiled at me and indicated for me to follow her. I entered the kitchen and followed her down a small hallway until she stopped at the farthest door. She opened it and stepped aside.

I peered inside to find a small bathing chamber. A copper tub stood in the center of the room with small tables pushed up against opposing walls, on which I assumed were bottles of soaps. There was a large cabinet on the wall opposite the door.

"We offer traveling sailors baths in here for a reasonable price, but you can use it for free. There are clean clothes in that cabinet."

I turned to her then, suspicion clouding my eyes. "Why are you doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"Offering me your kindness."

She looked at me and then gave me a sad smile. "Because no one should be as shattered as you are."

My heart clenched as she turned and left, and my eyes could have filled with tears had I not willed them away. After a few moments I closed the door and, throwing off my clothes, practically fell into the steaming water. I had not bathed in hot water for months, and it felt so good that, as my head fell back onto the tubs edge, I finally felt my pain and let a few tears escape me, and a small, strangled cry escaped my lips. After awhile I poured some soap onto a cloth and thoroughly washed my body. It was only then that I realized how filthy I really was.

I ended up draining the tub and filling it again with hot water and settled my body into it for a long soak. When I was ready I got out, dried myself, and opened the cabinet. There were several tunics hanging and several boots lined up on the bottom. I selected a dark brown linen tunic and brown belt and they fit rather well. I also selected a pair of black leather boots and put them on. I was thankful that they were worn because new boots would have hurt my sore feet. I hadn't worn anything on my feet since my own boots fell apart two weeks ago.

A part of me wanted to hide in that room, but I was curious by nature, so I ventured out into the hall and made my way towards what I assumed was the main room. I peered into the room and realized just how much I missed life's simple comforts. There was a huge fireplace built into one wall, with a fire blazoning, and several tables were scattered about it with small oil lamps burning on each table. This was the only light it the room, and the doorway that led into the kitchen was darkened by a drape. A long tall bench ran along the wall where the door to the kitchen was and several amphorae of wine were stacked on it, along with several drinking vessels.

Several people were scattered amongst the tables, and were talking or laughing as they drank. I was about to turn away when the woman named Hecuba entered from the kitchen and waved me over to her. She indicated a series of small booths near the door to the kitchen.

"Would you like to sit awhile, maybe have a cup of wine?"

I was too tired at this point to decline so I glanced at her before settling into one of the booths. She lit the small oil lamp on the table and then moved to pour me a cup of wine.

When she set the cup in front of me I offered her a weak smile of thanks. "Thank you."

"My pleasure."

I found myself looking up to her then, a little curious about her. "Who was that girl you were talking to earlier?"

She sat opposite me. "Oh, that's my youngest, Lila. She helps out here every afternoon."

I nodded. "Her looks must favor her father."

"Yeah, they do. But my oldest looks exactly like me. If you stick around tonight you'll hear her tell her stories."

"Stories?"

Hecuba ran her hand through her hair then. 'She's a dreamer, that one. She fancies herself a bard and likes to come here every night and entertain our guests."

My curiosity was piqued then. "What's her name?"

"Gabrielle!"

We both turned then when a young blonde woman entered the inn dressed in a simple light beige, cotton chiton and sandaled feet.

A young man, the one who had called her name, stood from one of the tables and walked over to her, grinning broadly. "What have you done with your hair?"

The young woman, Gabrielle, ran her hand through her short blonde locks. "Do you like it, Perdicas?"

Hecuba stood up then and leaned against our table. "What have you done with your beautiful hair?"

Gabrielle turned to her mother then and laughed. "Oh, mom, its much too hot for all that hair. Don't you like it?"

The young man put an arm around Gabrielle's waist. "It's lovely."

I brought my cup up to my lips then and stared at the blonde over the rim of my glass. The boy was right; it was lovely, she was lovely-beautiful, actually.

The young woman looked down then, as if noticing for the first time there was someone else at the table her mother was at. Her smile faltered slightly then, and I could have sworn a shyness enveloped her, one that wasn't there before.

Before I knew what was happening, I found myself on my feet then, and the young woman known as Gabrielle was walking in my direction.

Her mother pushed off the table and indicated me with her hand. "Gabrielle, I'd like you to meet…meet…" She looked at me then and shook her head. "I'm sorry but I didn't get your name?"

I panicked for a moment then, wondering what the mere mention of my name would do to these people. I looked from Hecuba to Gabrielle and finally blurted it out. "Xena-my name is Xena."

Gabrielle simply took my large hand then, and held it between her own. "It's so nice to meet you, Xena."

I remember that when I looked down on her my I opened my mouth as if to say something, but words failed me then. Then I finally noticed her beautiful emerald eyes, they sparkled bright, even in the dim light of the tavern. I stared at her, as her small hands held one of my larger callused ones, and wondered why I couldn't find my voice.

She looked like she wanted to say something, as well, but she didn't. Then her smile faded as her lips parted slightly.

We just stared at each other, for the longest moment I could remember.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Hecuba, she was looking from her daughter to me and a small smile touched her lips. I tactfully removed my hand from Gabrielle's and nodded to her.

"Its nice to meet you, too." I cursed the hoarseness in my voice.

Hecuba touched her daughter's shoulder. "Have any new material for our guests tonight?"

Gabrielle's eyes lit up. "No, nothing really new. But I thought I'd continue with Hesiod's Theogony tonight, it's a real favorite."

I watched as Hecuba beamed with delight at her oldest daughter. She lightly brushed her hand over the young woman's face and then walked to one corner of the room where a tall stool was.

"Fair and gentle guests!"

All in the room faced the older woman. "Once again, tonight we are graced with the stories of my fair-haired daughter, Gabrielle."

As Gabrielle walked over to her mother the small crowd cheered. When Gabrielle sat on the stool one of the patrons put a glass of wine on the small table next to it. The blonde smiled down at the man and took a sip of wine.

Then her face lit up as she began her tale. "I thought that tonight we would continue the wonderful tale of Hesiod that I began three days ago."

"Eurynome, a daughter of Oceanus with lovely looks, bore him the three Graces, Aglaia, Euphrosyne, and the fair Thalia. From their eyes love that dissolves the flesh seeped down as they looked; beautiful is their glance from under their brows.

And he came to the bed of Demeter abundant in nourishment, and she bore the white-armed Persephone, whom Aidoneus stole from her mother, Zeus the resourceful granting her to him.

Again, he took love of Memory with her beautiful hair, from whom the Muses with gold diadems were born to him, nine of them, whose pleasure is in feasts and the delights of song.

Leto gave birth to Apollo and Artemis the archer-lovely children above all the Celestials-in shared intimacy with Zeus who bears the aegis…"