~ Trying to Fall in Love ~
by Queen Karena & Red Hope


Disclaimers: Violence: None so far.

Subtext: We definitely are subtext writers.

Copyright: Universal/MCA owns Xena, Gabrielle, Argo, and Joxer. Karena and Red Hope own the story line, so do not touch it!

Time Frame: Fifth season based.

Started: December 7th 2000, Thursday

redhope@redhope.net


Chapter One: The Morning

Red Hope

Xena sighed and continued waiting beside the door of the tavern. She folded her arms and leaned against the wall beside the door. She stared through the empty tavern. Sunrise had begun about a candlemark ago and she wanted to head off.

Last night had been chaotic for the group. They had ended up with a small room and not enough money to get a second room. Xena had offered Gabrielle to take the bed while she would sleep on the floor. That's when the entire debate began.

"Xena, let me sleep on the floor," cut in the warrior-bard.

"No." The Warrior Princess helped up her hand. "I will; you sleep on the bed."

"What about me?" asked Joxer suddenly.

Both warriors turned to the wanna-be warrior and considered.

"You can sleep in the bed with Gabrielle," suggested Xena with a sly grin.

"Ooooh no." The warrior-bard spun around and faced her friend. "Joxer is not sleeping in the bed with me." She folded her arms. "I'd rather sleep with Argo."

"You can't, its too cold." Xena just cut off an option.

"Hold on." Joxer looked at Gabrielle. "Why won't you sleep in the bed with me?"

The Amazon Queen cringed; she hardly hid the cringe. "I just? can't."

The man put his hands on his hips and nodded while saying, "I see, what you think I have kutties or something?"

"Yeah something like that," muttered Gabrielle under her breath. She held her hands up. "I don't mean any offense but it's just that? I? well? I have problems with? male species." That just came out totally wrong, mused Gabrielle. I'm toast.

"Like what?" probed the man. He corked an eyebrow. "Do you like women more?"

Both Xena and Gabrielle's eyebrows shot up above their bangs.

Gabrielle started coughing and patted her chest. "Not quite like that, Joxer." She cleared her throat and said carefully, "I just get a little? nervous being around men let alone sleeping in a bed."

The wanna-be warrior sighed. "I won't do anything. I'll stay on my side."

"Yeah Gabrielle, he'll stay on his side," taunted the warrior with a grin.

The warrior-bard glared at her partner. "You stay out of this." She narrowed her eyes in warning before facing Joxer again. "I don't feel comfortable, Joxer. Its simple as that." After those words, she rotated on the heels of her boots and smirked at Xena. "Xena, why don't you sleep in the bed with Joxer while I sleep on the floor."

The Warrior Princess scowled her friend. "Not on your life."

"What's wrong?" teased the smaller woman. "There's enough room on that bed for you."

Xena's eyes narrowed instantly. "Don't even."

Gabrielle grabbed her friend's arm. "Excuse us, Joxer? we'll be back." She dragged Xena out of the room and closed the door quietly behind. "I'm not sleeping in the same bed with him," she growled lowly.

"Gabrielle, he won't do anything." The warrior put her hands on her hips.

The Amazon Queen sighed and ran a hand through her short hair. "Xena, please? I can't do this." She peered up. "Let me sleep on the floor."

"No," stated the warrior. "You need to sleep comfortably tonight."

"It's not going to be comfortable with Joxer a breath away," the younger woman hissed.

The older woman sighed and gazed everywhere but at Gabrielle.

"Xena?." The warrior-bard grasped her friend's arm. "Be my hero." She smiled innocently. "How about? we all sleep in the bed?"

Xena look at her partner instantly. "No-"

"Please," Gabrielle begged. "If I have to suffer, you can suffer with me." Her hands slipped down and touched her friend's hand on the leather-clad hip. "Please, Xena," she whispered.

The Warrior Princess sighed and lifted her hands off her hips. She covered Gabrielle's hand with her two larger hands. "You owe me."

The warrior-bard studied her friend's hands covering her own. She smiled softly before placing her free hand on top of Xena's hands. "Thank you," she said sincerely.

"You're welcome."

Gabrielle smiled then gave her friend a long warm hug.

That was when the debate had ended and Xena failed miserable to win the debate. Well, wasn't failing more like submitting to Gabrielle's will. She grinned at that. She just loved submitting to Gabrielle when it felt just right. Last night had been one of the times. One thing she knew, Gabrielle could get anything she wanted from Xena if she just asked. Anything.

But needless to say, Joxer that night never even so much as twitched in the bed. He was too fearful that if he moved an eyelid; Xena would have hurt him for it. Joxer was not about to anger the warrior especially when he knew how protective she was over Gabrielle.

So, Gabrielle slept very well last night. Even more so considering Xena had slept on her side, facing Gabrielle, and her left arm dropped on the warrior-bard's stomach. It had merely been by accident, so they both justified and went with it. How else would they explain it? That they had deeper feelings for each other? No, that wasn't a topic on hand between them right now.

Xena whipped out of her thoughts and heard somebody coming down the steps.

Gabrielle reappeared at the bottom of the steps and spotted her best friend by the door. She flashed a smile briefly. Only briefly because of their traveling company, whom Gabrielle was sick of being near. But, she went over to the warrior and folded her arms. "He's coming."

"Wonderful," mumbled the Warrior Princess.

"Horses saddled up?" asked the small warrior.

Xena nodded. "We're ready to go other then?" she trailed off.

The Amazon Queen nodded and stood silent. She reached down and adjusted her leather belt of her orange skirt.

The older woman grinned and taunted, "Still getting use to the leathers?"

"No," stated the younger woman. She arched an eyebrow at her friend. "I've been wearing them for most of the year, I'm use to them."

The Warrior Princess chuckled and lifted her eyes at hearing a clanking coming down the stairs. She sighed dramatically.

Gabrielle glanced over.

Joxer came bustling down the steps with his armor making a ruckus all the way down.

The warrior-bard groaned quietly. "Here we go again," she mumbled to her partner.

Xena chuckled inwardly. "We'll be okay."

"Yeah but see?" Gabrielle leaned towards Xena, "he has a crush on me? not you."

The Warrior Princess bit her lower lip. "True," she agreed. "Just kiss him and maybe he'll stop," she teased.

"I don't think so," growled Gabrielle yet she smiled warmly when Joxer was closer. "Glad you finally made it."

Joxer coughed and rested his hand on his sword hilt. "Sorry, takes awhile to get all this armor on." He peered up at Xena. "Right Xena?"

The warrior straightened up and replied, "No." She smirked, opened the door, and left.

The wanna-be warrior dropped his shoulder. "Well for us male warriors? it takes longer," he stated with bravado.

Gabrielle slammed her right hand on his chest plate. "Sure, Joxer." She grinned and left the tavern.

Joxer sighed and followed but made sure to close the door behind.

The group soon had their horses out of the stables and mounting them. They headed on the road in the blustery day, which made them pull their cloaks out. It was a calm, relaxing day in the early morning.

Chapter Two -The Day

Queen Karena

The only sounds that could be heard were the clip clop of the horses' hoofs and the clanking of Joxer's armor. Gabrielle is very quiet this morning, Xena pondered. Her mind kept wandering back to the comment that Gabrielle had made last night. "I have problems with the male species."

Xena looked at Gabrielle's profile. Gabrielle looked really great with short hair. Made her make so much more mature. Xena loved the way the sun highlighted her hair. To be honest she loved everything about Gabrielle.

Xena's musings returned to the conversation from last night. I wonder why she said that. Does she prefer woman? What does she think about me ? Xena shook her head. Let's not go there! Easier said than done though. I need a diversion. I bet she is hungry. It has been a few candlemarks since breakfast.

"Let's stop shortly and have something to eat," Xena informed the others.

"Good idea, Xena, I am feeling a bit hungry." Gabrielle turned to Xena. "And don't you say anything about my appetite." She grinned at her best friend.

Xena laughed at the running joke and nudged Argo into a gallop. Gabrielle urged her horse to match.

Joxer valiantly tried to keep up but he was not as accomplished on his horse. He decided to concentrate on just staying on and catch up with his two friends shortly.

Xena and Gabrielle rode for another half a candlemark until the sound of running water saw them slowing their horses back to a walk. Gabrielle was the first to notice that Joxer was not with them.

"We seemed to have lost Joxer."

"And you say that like it is a bad thing?" Xena grinned.

Gabrielle laughingly nudged her horse closer to Xena and gave her a quick backhand. "You are just sooo bad, Xena."

"Don't worry. He will catch up with us shortly. I don't think he is quite up to galloping on his horse yet." Xena smirked. "Must be all that armor."

"So what are you going to feed me, Warrior Princess?" Gabrielle cheekily inquired.

"Depends on what that stomach monster of yours has a fancy for," retorted Xena.

"Ooooh, my choice. Now lets see, fish, rabbit or bird. So many choices. Hmmmm, I think I would fancy some fish. Unless it is too cold for you to go for a dip?" Gabrielle knew making the challenge would result in her getting her choice.

Xena was enjoying the gentle banter. She had missed it all morning. "I think I could brave the cold for you as long as you promise to warm me up afterwards," she purred. Oops, did I just say that out loud?

Gabrielle did a double take. Did Xena just say what I think she said? Nah, she wouldn't have meant it like that.

"Hi Ho friends, is this where we are stopping?" yelled Joxer as he rounded the corner.

Gabrielle breathed a sigh of relief. I will file that away for looking at later. "You go get the fish, Xena, and I will get a fire going. Joxer, why don't you get some more wood?" The others nodded and set about their respective tasks.

Gabrielle quickly got the fire ready and sorted out the herbs to use with the fish. She could hear Joxer crashing through the undergrowth on his hunt for wood. Her thoughts returned to where they had been all day. Everything is so strange since we came back to life. There is a closeness about us that wasn't there before but there is also something else. It is like a need that I can't identify. I just wish I could talk about it with Xena but without knowing what it is, what would I say? Gabrielle's forehead wrinkled in consternation. She was a bard that couldn't articulate what was happening to her.

A crash brought her attention back to the present. She looked over to see what it was. Joxer was sprawled on the ground surrounded by tree branches.

"I'm fine I'm fine. No problems," Joxer warbled. He had really wanted to do this task right to show Gabrielle that he was not incompetent. He knew that it was always going to be difficult to get her attention when she traveled with such an awesome person. However, he knew that he just had to. Her death at the hands of the Romans had made him realize just how much she did mean to him. And he needed to tell her that.

Gabrielle let out a frustrated sigh. Joxer being here isn't helping either. Can't he see that we need some time on our own just to sort through what happened? Of course not, Joxer is never the brightest when it comes to things like that.

"Is everything okay?" Xena asked softly. She placed the fish by Gabrielle and knelt down to face Gabrielle. She had heard the sigh from her friend and was starting to get really worried. Something was definitely wrong and Gabrielle wasn't talking about it. This was something that was happening more of late and Xena did not know how to breakthrough. Talking was something that had always been Gabrielle's forte.

"Oh yeah, everything's fine," Gabrielle answered absently whilst picking up the fish. C'mon Gabrielle, get on board here. You are worrying her. "These fish look great, thank you." She smiled warmly at Xena.

Xena grinned back. "I'll go and see to the horses while you turn these fish into one of your normal masterpieces."

Gabrielle's smile got bigger. Xena's compliments always had a way of warming her even on the coldest of days. Their eyes had not moved from each other and there was a softness in both.

"Ahem, what do you want me to do, Gabby?" Joxer interjected. It had felt as if they had forgotten he was there. And the looks on both of their faces as they turned to him seem to reiterate that fact.

"Ummmm." Gabrielle was at a loss at what to say. For the briefest of moments everything had seemed so right and then the interruption. She wasn't even sure she could remember what he had asked. Her eyes reflected her confusion.

"You can help me with the horses," Xena briskly replied. She quickly moved away from Gabrielle to allow her time to gather her thoughts. Gabrielle smiled a warm thank you to Xena. Xena winked back and walked away.

The fish did not take long to cook and soon they were all sitting around the fire enjoying the food.

"So, where as we headed, Xena?" Gabrielle asked.

"Amphipolis." Xena looked at Gabrielle. "I thought we would catch up with mother, let her know that we are okay. You know how fast rumors spread about us. If you want we can go to Potidaea after that."

"Sounds like a plan. It will be good to see your mother again. And I do love her cooking." Gabrielle smiled at Xena. "And my parents do need to know I am all right."

"How many days ride is that, Xena?" Joxer wondered apprehensively. He hoped it wasn't far as his riding ability was not the greatest. He hurt in places that he had no intention of mentioning to his two friends.

Xena and Gabrielle laughed at the look on his face. Gabrielle remembered all to well the pain involved when you weren't used to riding a horse for long periods of time.

"Only a couple of days at a slow pace, Joxer," Xena warmly answered. "We are all quite tired so we won't push it."

Joxer's face showed his relief. "Well then, my fine friends, let's go. A soft bed and good food is calling us."

Xena quickly put out the fire and Gabrielle tidied up the campsite. They all remounted their horses and headed off again; all deep in their own thoughts.

Chapter Three -Warrior Pillow?

Red Hope

Xena slowed her horse down and glanced at her partner beside her.

Gabrielle came up along side the warrior and flashed a smile.

The warrior chuckled and gazed ahead. Far behind, she could hear Joxer catching up with is rattling armor. "We better wait up," she mentioned and gestured the slow warrior-wannabe far behind.

The warrior-bard sighed and nodded. "He has the worst timing anymore."

"I know," muttered the Warrior Princess. She reached over and patted her friend's knee. "How you holding up on your horse?"

The small woman chuckled and grinned. "I'm fine." She looked away and said quietly, "Alright? I'll admit I'm a bit saddle sore."

The warrior smirked but lost it. She shifted uncomfortable in her saddle.

Gabrielle caught this and teased, "So are you."

"Never," stated the older woman. She shot a smug look. "A warrior is never sore."

"Uh huh." The small woman grinned evilly. "You'd be reaping the benefits if you were sore."

Xena corked an eyebrow at hearing her friend's words. "What? benefits would that be?"

"Hmmm? something like a nice? massage," uttered the warrior-bard with a low tone.

The Warrior Princess's eyebrow arched even higher. She leaned towards her partner, preparing to say something very sensual but the moment was broken.

"Howdy, pal gals," greeted Joxer. He came right up to his friends and noticed the funny scene. He cleared his throat. "What's the hold up?"

Xena closed her eyes and held back her anger. She sat upright in her saddle again.

Gabrielle answered back before her partner could. "Just waiting for you." She paused then added, "We're going to go a little further then break for camp." She noted that Xena was quiet and still calming down. Wow, I hope she doesn't plan to shove her chakram up Joxer's-

"Well, let's go then," cut in Joxer's voice. "I am pooped here."

The warrior glanced back at the man. "Why don't you go ahead of Gabrielle and I."

"Sure." Joxer flashed a silly smile and tapped his horse in the sides. He went ahead of them and continued trekking down the road.

"You okay?" whispered Gabrielle.

"Yeah." Xena laughed deeply in hopes to let the moment go. "He's got rrreal bad timing."

"Ummm can we..." The small warrior stopped, feeling a little odd in the request.

The older woman raised an eyebrow. "Go on."

Gabrielle laughed. "Let's walk."

The taller woman nodded and dismounted her horse.

The younger woman did the same and took her horse's reins. She walked beside her friend down the road. She felt uneasy since the first time she'd met Xena. It was if another door stood before her like when she had the option to leave Potidaea with the warrior.

Xena certainly picked up on the quiet, uneasy atmosphere. She wanted to reassure her friend but before she could, Gabrielle cut in.

"Hey? thank you for last night," mentioned the warrior-bard. "I know you didn't have to do that and?" she trailed off.

The warrior smiled softly and walked closer. She rubbed her friend's upper back along her shoulder blades. "Not a problem." She dropped her hand.

"I tell you, he didn't move at all." The Amazon Queen chuckled and grinned.

The Warrior Princess snickered. "Well? after you went to sleep I told him not to even breathe on me or he'd be on the floor in agony."

Gabrielle laughed then asked, "Did you really?"

"No," answered the warrior in an amused tone. "But I think it was established none the less."

The small woman chuckled deeply and nodded. "He's still scared of you even after?."

"Three and half years," finished the warrior.

Gabrielle huffed. "Its been that long?"

Xena nodded. "Makes you feel old huh?"

"Nah," brushed off the younger woman. She peered up with an evil grin. "Make you feel old?"

"Gods, yes." The warrior sighed dramatically. "I still recall those days you were just a kid tagging along."

The Amazon Queen glared and pushed her friend. "I was a usefully tag along."

"Yeah sure? if you say so," teased Xena.

"Ha, ha."

The warrior sighed and smiled warmly. "You were just what I needed? will always need."

"Somebody has to keep you inline," muttered the short warrior.

Xena laughed. "Rrrright."

Gabrielle went silent while having thought about last night and today. "You know? I slept real well last night."

"Oooh?"

"Yeah." The small woman looked up. "And it had nothing to do with the bed."

The Warrior Princess knew where this was leading too, she couldn't believe it either. "Then what was it?"

Gabrielle blushed, she tried hiding it but really could not. "Hey? have I ever mention how comfortable your body is?"

Xena took in a shaky breath and responded, "No," quietly.

"Well? you are."

The warrior grinned and asked, "Care to try it again tonight?"

Gabrielle grinned back. "If you're offering."

"Oooh yeah." The older woman laughed deeply. "My body as your big pillow."

The warrior-bard laughed hard and said, "Xena the Warrior Pillow."

"Oh no," groaned the warrior. "I shouldn't have said that."

"Don't worry." The small woman patted her friend's stomach. "I won't tell aaanybody."

Xena smirked. "Such reassurance you give."

"Don't I?"

The warrior laughed and kept walking.

Gabrielle smiled at her accomplishment because she was now able to sleep in her friend's arms. Oh, she was getting just a little closer in each step she took.

Chapter Four: A Declaration is Made

Queen Karena

Joxer eased his horse to a stop. He had been riding for ages and his friends still hadn't caught him. He pondered the last few days. Something is different. I wonder if they even know I am here sometimes. The looks they give me are like I am intruding. It has never been like that before.

He worried that he had left it too late to tell Gabby just how much he loved her. My plan was to impress her with my new and improved skills. How can I do that when I am either going on ahead or trying to catch up? I will just have to make the time. I will tell her tonight.

Joxer felt better knowing he had made this decision. His mind started fantasizing how it would be. He just knew that once Gabby realized how deep his feelings went that she would fall into his arm. The possibility that she might not love him back did not enter into his mind.

Xena and Gabrielle came around the bend just in time to see Joxer's horse walk off to the side of the road and start nibbling on the grass. The movement startled Joxer out of his fantasy. He madly grabbed at the saddle horn but his flailing arms missed the target. His eyes just registered the presence of Xena and Gabrielle as he tumbled off his horse.

Xena caught him just before he hit the ground. "Are you alright, Joxer?"

"Just great," Joxer muttered under his breath. "I get saved by the Warrior Princess. My day just continues to get better."

Xena raised her eyebrows. Her hearing had caught Joxer's words and she wondered where they had come from. She made a mental note to talk to him about it later.

"Is it Amarice?" Gabrielle's question interrupted Xena's musing.

"Nope. You only have four questions left, Gabrielle. Are you sure you don't want to give up?"

The return to twenty questions had been a surprise to Gabrielle especially because Xena had initiated it. The game had such pleasant memories for her. It was always a good indication of how close they were. It had been absent in the last few months leading up to the crucifixion.

"Of course I don't want to give up. I must be close if you are asking me that!" Gabrielle grinned up at Xena, her eyes sparkling. This brought a corresponding smile to Xena's face.

"Ummmm, Xena. You can ? ah ? let me go now. I am fine." Joxer wriggled in Xena's grip to emphasize his request.

Xena removed her hands from his arms and moved away. "There are easier ways to dismount," Xena quipped. Gabrielle giggled and looked away.

Joxer sighed. "Thanks Xena, I did appreciate your help."

"No problem. We would hate to see you hurt." Xena smiled warmly at him then looked around at the location. "This is a good place to stop for the evening. You did well, Joxer."

"Anytime warrior chums," Joxer preened. There was nothing he liked better than getting a compliment from Xena. Okay, getting a compliment from Gabby would probably be higher on his list, but only just. This helped reinforce his warrior-status. He had no intention of admitting that he hadn't even noticed the lake beside the road.

In no time the campsite was set. It was still early in the day and still quite warm.

"Let's go for a swim in the lake and cool off. It will also help with those aches and pains." Xena looked hopefully at the other two as she stripped down to her shift.

"I am definitely a starter for that!" Gabrielle grinned up at Xena. "I am not embarrassed to admit that I am a bit saddle sore."

"Warriors don't get saddle sore, Gabrielle," Xena stated emphatically. Gabrielle burst out laughing. "Right, Xena, I believe you." She quickly swatted Xena on the backside and took off running towards the lake.

"You will pay for that, Gabrielle!" Xena raced after Gabrielle. "Are you coming, Joxer?" she yelled over her shoulder.

"No no, you two go. I have something I need to do." Joxer quietly sat down on one of logs they had dragged up for seating. He wanted to work the words out just right so Gabrielle would know exactly what he meant.

"Is he okay?" Gabrielle cast a worried glance in his direction.

"He will be fine, Gabrielle. And that is more than I can say for you." Xena proceeded to splash Gabrielle big time. "Smack me on the bottom will you."

Gabrielle immediately retaliated and the water fight was on. This is so great. We haven't played together for ages. Gabrielle could tell how relaxed Xena was becoming. There had definitely been a shift since their re-birth. Xena seemed softer and more open. More likely to let me in. That last thought caused the edges of her mouth to crease upwards.

Xena could tell that something had distracted Gabrielle. Xena took the opportunity to study her friend. Friend definitely did not describe how I see Gabrielle. She is my life ? my love. The crucifixion had made Xena realize that she could not run from this anymore. Their lives were too interlinked. She wouldn't make the first move but she would not push Gabrielle away either. They both deserved happiness.

Xena quickly dove under the water and swam behind Gabrielle. She could tell when Gabrielle came back to the present because she started looking around for Xena. "Looking for me," she purred into Gabrielle's ear. Gabrielle shuddered from the warm breath caressing her neck. Before she had time to react, Xena quickly dunked her under the water.

Gabrielle came up coughing and spluttering.

"Paybacks are a bitch, Gabrielle. When will you learn?" Xena laughed and headed for the shore.

You shouldn't turn your back on me, Xena. Gabrielle's eyes turned to slits and an evil grin spread across her face. She quietly followed Xena until they were both in the shallows. Then she made her move, tackling Xena around the legs. Xena was taken completely by surprise and tumbled forward. She landed face first into the mud. Gabrielle quickly released her legs and fell back in hysterics.

"You think that was funny, do you Gabrielle?" Xena's voice dripped with menace.

Gabrielle had tears running down her face. She couldn't have spoken if her life depended on it so she just nodded.

Xena could not hold her laugher anymore and joined in. "You got me good, Gabrielle. That will teach me to be smart. Paybacks are a bitch." She executed a perfect dive back into the water to clean off the mud. Walking back to the shore, she offered her hand to Gabrielle who was still sitting in the water and hauled her back up. Arm in arm they walked out of the water.

They laid down on the shoreline until the dying rays of the sun had completely dried them both.

"How about rabbit for dinner?" Xena clipped on her chakram and her sword as she waited for Gabrielle to answer.

"Sounds great to me. I will prepare the vegetables while your gone." Gabrielle headed towards the saddlebags and retrieved the food and herbs she needed.

Xena waved to them both and headed out to hunt. Joxer started pacing around the low burning fire. The clanging of his armor caught Gabrielle's attention. Raising her head from the vegetables she was peeling her eyes followed his journey.

"What is the matter, Joxer?" Gabrielle inquired. He had not said anything since their return from the lake and that was so unusual for Joxer.

Joxer knew this was probably the only chance he would get to talk to Gabrielle without Xena being around. Now that the time was here, his nervousness increased ten-fold. Joxer focused on Gabrielle and started walking towards her. Unfortunately, he forgot how close he was to the fire and stepped in it.

"Oww ? oww ? owww." Joxer danced around the campsite, holding his foot. Gabrielle reacted quickly and threw water over his foot.

"Are you alright, Joxer?" Gabrielle was definitely worried. Joxer was normally clumsy but this was something else.

"I really need to talk to you before Xena gets back." Joxer looked everywhere but at Gabrielle.

'Ooookay, sit down. Let's talk." Gabrielle pointed to the log next to hers.

Joxer took a big breath. "You know that I care for you very much."

"I care for you as well, Joxer." Gabrielle encouraged him to keep talking. She could tell by his behavior that whatever it was it was very important.

Joxer started fiddling with his armor. He had rehearsed it all afternoon but now that the moment was here, the words all left.

"I ... I ? I ?" Joxer swallowed and tried again. "Gabby, I uh uh I un, dammit, Gabby I love you."

Gabrielle was shocked. Of all the things that Joxer could have said that was not what she had expected.

"Do you mean like a sister?" Gabrielle hopefully asked. "Because I love you like a brother." Please let him say yes to this. Please. I really don't want this conversation if it is going where I think it is going.

"No Gabby, I love you like a man loves a woman." Now that he had explained it more clearly Joxer just waited for Gabby to throw herself into his arms and swear her undying love for him. And waited.

Xena had been lucky. She had managed to catch two good-sized rabbits without having to go very far. She was just about to walk into camp when she heard Joxer's words. She stopped immediately and waited. This was not the time to make her presence known.

Gabrielle looked at Joxer with compassion. She knew that she would have to hurt this man but she wanted to give him some dignity.

"I can't love you that way, Joxer." Gabrielle had taken his hands in hers and was softly stroking his hands.

"Why can't you love me like that? I love you." Joxer's voice had taken on a pleading element to it. This was definitely not going how he wanted. "It's Xena, isn't it? She is the reason why you can't love me. I just know it." His voice had a bitterness to it.

Gabrielle decided it was better to be honest with him. It was the only way to salvage a friendship over this. "Yes, Joxer, you are right. I can't love you as my heart belongs to Xena. I love her with everything that I am. You are a wonderful man and you deserve much happiness but it won't be from me. I am sorry, Joxer, but there is nothing I can do, or want to do, to change who I love."

"Does she know?" He asked softly. Joxer could not look at Gabrielle. It hurt too much.

"No, she doesn't. So please don't tell her. I will tell her when it is time. Promise me you won't tell her." Gabrielle forced Joxer to look her in the eyes. He could see the need in her eyes and the compassion.

"I promise. Can we still be friends?" He really needed to know the answer to this.

"I told you I love you like a brother. You will always be more than a friend, you are family." Gabrielle eyes shone with love for him and she pulled him into a big hug.

Xena could not stop the smile from spreading across her face. She loves me. Now that she knew how Gabrielle felt about her, she could wait. Xena's smile took a devious turn to it. I will wait for her to tell me but I might up the ante a bit in the flirting stakes. Life suddenly was filled with infinite possibilities.

Gabrielle broke the hug and looked Joxer in the eye. "Are you going to be okay?"

"Yeah. It will hurt for a bit but I will be the best brother you have ever had."

Gabrielle laughed. "Yes, Joxer, you will be." Joxer headed to the other side of the fire and started to mend his burnt boot.

Gabrielle had just restarted the vegetables when Xena arrived in the camp with her offering. Joxer was pleased that she hadn't arrived any earlier. The rabbits were added to the vegetables and everyone relaxed whilst the stew was cooking. There was a quietness to the camp but no one seemed to notice. Each was too involved in their own thoughts, absorbing all that had been said and heard.

Continued in Chapter Five?



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