Chapter 2


     Two less heroic looking, or feeling, individuals would have been hard to find. The storm had been completely unexpected and had hit before they could find shelter. This had resulted in the both of them being soaked to the skin. Even the heavy cloaks they were wearing had become sodden. When a fresh gust of wind came up its chill cut them to the bone. Xena's horse, Argo, was fairing somewhat better, though it looked rather hang dog, standing with its back to the wind.

     It had taken them longer to get through the mountains than they had anticipated and now their supply of food had dwindled to practically nothing. About all they had left were a few, thin, strips of dried, salted, meat and some, slightly over-ripe, apples with which to stave off their hunger until they reached the next village on the other side of the mountains.

     Had they both been riding they might have made better time. But the younger of the two, Gabrielle, had a problem with horses and didn't care for riding.

     While she loved them, as she did so many other living things, she was not the least bit comfortable riding them. Horses were beautiful and intelligent creatures and, in their own way, could show affection as well as receive it. All of these were traits Gabrielle valued highly. On the other hand horses were far larger, heavier, stronger, and faster than she was. Further, being the intelligent creatures they were, they sometimes had a mind of their own.

     On a number of occasions, when she'd had little choice but to ride, she'd only been a passenger and, on a few occasions, an unwelcome passenger at that. She had not been in control and control of her own movements was something she had to have. So let the whole world ride if such was their choice. She'd do her traveling on her own two feet; thank you very much.

     Xena and Gabrielle were worn out and they looked it. Their hair, like so much wet string, clung to the sides of their faces and both were having trouble controlling the chattering of their teeth. Sitting on two of a number of large flat stones, which had separated from the face of the cliff eons before, they were silently concentrating on chewing and swallowing what little remained of their food. Though they were finding the tough and stringy dried meat to be particularly good exercise for their jaw muscles the flavor was, decidedly, less than satisfactory.

     "Honk!"

     They raised their heads and looked at each other.

     "Honk!"

     Jumping to her feet Gabrielle went to the edge of the overhang and leaning out from under it she looked up toward the bases of the dismal clouds.

     "Honk honk!"

     There! She saw it. One of the largest, plumpest, and potentially most delicious, looking geese she'd ever seen. "Would you just look at that goose up there," Gabrielle said, her eyes following the birds movements hungrily. "I wish it would come down here."

     Joining her Xena followed Gabrielle's gaze and watched as the goose described lazy circles over the copse.

     "I'm so hungry," said Gabrielle, "I could eat it all by myself; dirt, guts, feathers, and all."

     Continuing to watch a thought struck Xena. "That's funny," she said. "Normally geese don't fly in this sort of weather."

     A sly grin appeared on Gabrielle's face. "Oh well," she said, "it's a lot safer up there than it would be down here, anywhere near me, right now."

     Finally, after a few more minutes, the large bird banked and glided out of sight and Gabrielle and Xena went back to where they'd been sitting; under the scant shelter of the overhanging rock.

     Two women, Gander thought to himself. One dark haired and the other a reddish blond. Then too the blond one had seemed shorter and not as heavily built as the other. Could these two be Xena and Gabrielle, he wondered. Well there was only one way to find out.

     Turning back he dropped bellow the level of the tops of the trees and headed for a point, just to one side of the beginning of the copse, next to the face of the cliff. Landing he moved as carefully and quietly as he could, on web feet, and entered the copse. Slowly he waddled toward where he now knew them to be.

     When he was still several cubits from where they sat he chose to find a vantage point, under cover of some thick bushes, where he could observe the two of them for a little while. They were about the most miserable looking pair he'd seen for quite some time. Both were bent over, huddled under their wet cloaks and trying, obviously unsuccessfully, to get warm.

     Gander's heart went out to them. At least it did until the young blond one began speaking.

     "How do you like your goose cooked, Xena? Me, I like mine roasted and basted in butter with plenty of spices, on a spit, over a bed of low burning coals."

     Me oh my! How interesting, Gander thought to himself. Bizarre but interesting! Here I am, only a few cubits from this attractive young lady, listening to her describe, in considerable detail, how she'd go about preparing me for her meal. If geese could grin, which alas they couldn't, his would have been down-right wicked.

     I hope what I've heard of her good sense of humor is accurate he mused. If she likes cooked goose so much I think I'll see just how well she enjoys having her goose cooked; but just a little.

     He continued to listen as he studied the physical layout and began to formulate a simple but effective plan. Wizards are many things including practical jokesters.

     "Well actually, Gabrielle," Xena was saying, "I prefer mine stuffed with bread crumbs, celery, onions, and herbs, and baked slowly in an earthen oven. But why waste time talking about it? We don't have a goose. And if we did there isn't a bit of dry tinder or wood to be had. We can't even build a fire, right now, to warm ourselves."

     "I know Xena.," said Gabrielle, "but if I could get my hands on that goose I'd eat my share raw." This last was said with a somewhat toothy, good natured, grin.

     So these two were the famous, or notorious, Xena and Gabrielle. They certainly didn't look much like the stuff of legends. In fact Gander would have bet they would agree with his last thought themselves; were they honest. Anyway, with his search now over, the only thing remaining to be seen was whether or not all his efforts had been worth while. He certainly hoped so.

     Xena and Gabrielle continued to sit there with their backs to him. The large, flat, rocks they were siting on left a fair amount of room behind both of them.

     Quietly Gander crossed the short distance between where he'd been and where Gabrielle and Xena sat. Just as quietly he gained the top of the rock directly behind Gabrielle. What he had in mind would be far more safely done with her. Xena had a reputation for being quicker than a viper's strike and many times more deadly; especially when taken by surprise from behind. Gabrielle was speaking again.....

     "You know, Xena, the more I think of that big, beautiful, goose the easier it is for me to imagine the smell of it roasting over that bed of coals I was talking about."

     By now Gander had crept very close to her. Close enough to be able to extend his neck so his beak was almost touching Gabrielle's ear. Her last rhetorical remarks on the merits of goose for dinner was the proverbial last straw for Gander.

     "HONK!"

     Gabrielle's shriek was ear splitting as she leapt high off her seat and landed on her feet a couple of cubits away.

     Xena's reaction was just as quick but, as expected, entirely different in nature. She had whirled about as she sprang to her feet, her Chakram in her hand, her arm already drawn back, wrist cocked, ready to let fly.

     Gander had instantly, and wisely, dropped back to the ground, to shelter behind the rock. The circular weapon whistled by, ruffling the downy feathers on the top of his head and throwing a shower of sparks as it struck the stone wall behind him, before returning to the hand of its owner.

     After a few moments Gander took a quick peak over the top of the rock. Xena had replaced her Chakram at her side and drawn her sword. She was beginning a stealthy move to the right while Gabrielle, her staff held at the ready, was beginning to circle around to the left. The look in both of their eyes said more loudly than words, "DINNER!" This was just too much for him.

     The sound started off like staccato honking but then there came a glowing light from behind the rock and the honking transformed itself into entirely human, hilarious, laughter. When the light died away he stood before the two, thoroughly amazed, women leaning heavily on his two staffs, still laughing fit to split his sides with tears of mirth streaming down his face.

     His mode of arrival had been both sudden and most unusual. To Xena and Gabrielle his physical appearance, now, was that of a rather ordinary looking man. But he had appeared in the form of a large goose only seconds before so they remained very much on their guard.

     In fact they thought him to be out of his mind! There he stood, in the presence of one of the worlds fiercest warriors. He had just startled her and her closest friend half to death.

     She had already come within a feather's width of taking this idiots head off. She had her sword in her hand, ready to give him a split personality the hard way, and the only thing he could do was stand their and laugh hysterically like some lunatic!

     His height was only average and he tended to the plump side. He had heavy dark eye brows which seemed to grow more or less together over the bridge of his nose. What hair he had on the top of his head was salt and pepper in color and on the shaggy side. He had a full beard which was also a mixture of brown, dirty grey, and white, and his matching mustache was fairly long with the ends trained upward.

     He wore a long, heavy, robe which was off white in color, its hood down around his back and shoulders. Over this he wore a sleeveless, grey, cloak which had a number of large, commodious, pockets. The boots he wore were of a soft, yellowish brown, leather.

     They studied him quite closely. The humor in his dark brown eyes bespoke a person one need not fear. Indeed the wrinkles upon the man's face, what wrinkles there were, were the sort one sees on the faces of those who laugh and smile a great deal. But Gabrielle and Xena were unsure of the man's intentions and they were still angry over being so badly startled.

     Regaining some measure of composure and wiping the tears from his eyes and face, with the sleeves of his robe, this strange man turned first to Gabrielle.

     "I must say I've been invited to dinner on a great many occasions," Gander said, chuckling, "by kings and common folk alike. Usually I've attended these affairs as the guest of honor. So it was a unique experience to hear your rather enthusiastic invitation to dinner ... as the main course!

     "Now I admit those who eves drop deserve to hear whatever they hear. But I'm sure you can see how bizarre it would be to listen to someone talking about you being put on a spit, basted with butter and spices, and roasted over a bed of coals."

     While his voice was gentle, warm, and friendly, the gleam in his eyes and the twisted grin which had crept across his face showed clearly he had an ornery sense of humor.

     Then he turned to Xena, who continued to eye him with suspicion, although she had sheathed her sword.

     "Xena," he said, "for me to meet you is a great pleasure. Please let me assure you I mean neither you or your friend any harm."

     Not the most forgiving of people Xena was still more than a little angry.

     "It may be a pleasure for you but the way you appeared just now was far from pleasant for us. What manner of Sorcerer are you?!" she demanded.

     "What I want to know," said Gabrielle, "is who you are."

     Gander nodded his head slightly. "Again I do apologize most humbly," he said with what sounded like real contrition in his voice. "Evidently I startled you somewhat more than I intended and, doubtless, my sense of humor leaves much to be desired.

     "However," he said, "I'm a Wizard; not a Sorcerer. As for who I am. . . . the few who know and like me call me 'Gander.' All others usually refer to me as 'Two Staffs."

     "Sorcerer, Wizard, what's the difference?" Gabrielle asked.

     "Granted," said Gander, "both Sorcerers and Wizards are possessed of somewhat similar powers so, I suppose, the simplest way to explain the difference is to say that Sorcerers are little more than jumped-up Wizards with a very bad attitude.

     "For example: A Sorcerer coming across the two of you would, most likely, go on his way and leave you to suffer with the elements. A Wizard, on the other hand, might do something like this."... Lifting the staff he held in his right hand Gander brought it down on the ground with a thud.

     The change in their immediate surroundings was as awesome as it was instantaneous. They were still under the same rock overhang but now there was a wall of canvas which had magically attached itself to the outer edge of the outcropping with its bottom edge, apparently, firmly attached to the ground as it extended completely around the overhang to create a closed in cozy shelter. At the same moment pillows and cushions had appeared on the large, flat, stones they had been using as seats and on the now dry ground making for three separate places to lay upon.

     A ring of small stones, surrounding a bed of glowing coals, had also appeared; placed conveniently in front of the 'seats.' Suspended over the coals were three game hens on a spit, which was slowly rotating, seemingly on its own.

     Just to one side of the coals there was a pot of moderate size with a lid on it. Also, here and there, were wooden bowls and cups and a small number of utensils. The aroma of hot, spicy, food was overpowering.

     "Is that food real!?" Gabrielle asked in disbelief.

     "It's as real as real can be," said Gander, "and while I realize you had roasted goose on your mind, perhaps similarly roasted game hens will suffice for the time being. By the way," Gander said, pointing to a skin container, "that wine is of a particularly fine vintage. I hope you like it."

     The three of them went over and took seats by the fire ring. Gabrielle and Xena were both, obviously, famished but Gander could sense they were hesitant about eating the food. Well I guess I can't blame them really, he thought to himself.

     Taking up a small, sharp, knife he reached over and sliced small pieces of meat from each of the birds, depositing them in a bowl. Next he took the lid from the pot and using a large wooden spoon he served himself a good portion of curry flavored rice. Beginning to eat he looked up at both of them. "I thought you were hungry?" he said, then returned his attention to his own meal.

     Gabrielle and Xena loaded up bowls of their own and went to work on their food with considerable vigor. As they ate their meals something else dawned on them. Only a few minutes before they had been soaked to the skin and trembling from the cold. Now their things were bone dry and they felt as though they had never been cold at all.

     Something else they'd noticed, as they had taken their seats, was this Wizard, Gander, had walked with a noticeable limp and had used both of his staffs for actual support. For some reason this Wizard, or whatever he was, began to interest Xena.

     When they'd finished their meal all that remained was a small collection of bones. They had tossed these into the coals.

     "That was great," Gabrielle sighed, contentedly.

     "It really was good," Xena said, taking a sip of wine from her cup.

     "Thank you." said Gander, a grin on his face. "Anyone can say they're sorry but I've found actions do speak more loudly than words. So now the question is .... have my actions spoken loudly enough for you?"

     "I'll say." Gabrielle said cheerfully.

     "Yes," Xena said, "apology accepted. There may be something lacking in your humor but you certainly can cook."

     "Am I to take it then," said Gander, humorously, "that you're not disappointed about having no goose for dinner?"

     When wet, cold, and hungry, neither of the two had seen anything humorous in the raucous manner of Gander's arrival. Now they were warm, dry, comfortable, and well fed.

     They looked at each other for a moment. Then Gabrielle began to giggle; just a little at first. Then, no longer able to maintain a straight face, Xena began to chuckle. Within a few seconds the dam broke, so to speak, and the three of them were laughing uproariously.

     After settling down again, Xena turned to Gander, her expression serious once more.

     "I wouldn't want you to take this wrong," she said, "but I think you'll agree this is a strange situation. I mean first you startle the both of us out of five years of life. Then I very nearly take your head off. Then you apologize by providing us with shelter, warmth, and one of the finest meals we've had in a long time; which really is wonderful. But I have this strong feeling, Gander, that there is something you want from us in return. Am I wrong?"      

     Both of them sat there watching him intently; waiting for him to reply. Gander looked into the glowing embers for a moment before answering Xena's question.

     "What do I want?" he said softly, almost to himself. "Perhaps to share some warmth, good food and drink, and companionship with two people I am quickly coming to like a great deal.

     "Perhaps one day, which may or may not be far off, to aid the two of you in a situation where you may desire such assistance rather badly. And perhaps," he said, looking them both in the eye, "one day, to be able to count both of you as friends." Then, locking eyes with Xena he said, "You wanted to know what I wanted. Now you have my answer; and it is the truth."

     "There's another question I have," Gabrielle said. "Why us? With all the other people in the world to choose from why single us out?"

     "Actually Gabrielle," he replied, "I should think you'd be able to figure that one out for yourself. The simple fact is we Wizards tend to make the majority of people nervous; sometimes very nervous. That is why Wizards tend to lead such solitary lives. For instance. If I'd done for others what I've done here, for us, most folks would have reacted like so many chickens with a weasel in the hen house. Oh my! How the feathers would fly! Whereas here we sit all snug, warm, and well fed, having a pleasant little chat.

     "So you see Wizards can associate only with a very special sort of people. Otherwise we usually have to stay pretty much to ourselves. Unfortunately this means we seldom have normal day to day social relationships."

     "In other words," Xena said with a grin, "Wizards get lonely."

     "Quite right!" said Gander. "Sometimes very lonely."

     "Why," asked Xena, "say so much to say something so simple?"

     "That Xena," Gander explained, "is part of the problem Wizards have in making and keeping friends. We are alone for such lengthy periods that when we do meet someone with whom we can converse we tend to be entirely too talkative.

     "Not to put too fine a point on it we become great, vociferous, wind bags. Of course this is a trait which tends to drive the majority of people to distraction." This last struck both Xena and Gabrielle as being not only truthful but funny as well.

     "Another thing about all this talking," Gander said with an easy smile, "is it's thirsty work." Holding up the wine skin he said, "Feel free to join me if you wish."

     After their cups were refilled Gabrielle asked if his many powers and abilities included being able to see into the future.

     "After a fashion," Gander said with a shrug of his shoulders.

     "Could you tell my fortune?" Gabrielle asked with somewhat more enthusiasm in her voice.

     Smiling gently Gander shook his head slightly from side to side. "I don't like to disillusion you Gabrielle," he said softly, "but the truth is most, so-called, fortune tellers are nothing but charlatans, fakes, and frauds."

     Gabrielle was becoming a bit frustrated.

     "But you just said you could see the future!" she protested.

     "Yes. I did." Gander said patiently. "There are those who are possessed of the 'Dubious Gift' and I happen to be one of them."

     Gabrielle was about to open her mouth to speak when Gander held up his hand and continued with what he had to say.

     "Seeing and knowing the future, Gabrielle, is by no means the same as knowing what has already come to pass. If anything is seen at all it is almost never seen clearly. Furthermore what little is seen and more or less understood is usually not what will be.... Only what might be. So you see, the telling of the future is, at best, a most imprecise art."

     "What's so 'dubious' about the gift of being able to see the future?" asked Gabrielle. "I wish I had it."

     "No Gabrielle," he said, momentarily turning serious, "you really wouldn't like it even if you had it."

     "Why not!" she demanded.

     "You wouldn't care in the least for the nightmares which so often go with it."

     The wind continued to gust blowing sheets of rain against the canvas of their shelter. But inside, the coals in the fire ring continued glowing a cheery red, radiating warmth. A sense of peace and contentment crept over the three of them and eventually they took to their beds of cushions and drifted into a deep, blissful, sleep.

 


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