Something really funny just happened. I'm still cracking up about it.
So, my roommate and I made dinner tonight for her, her fiance, and myself. Shrimp Alfredo, green beans, and garlic bread. So they get back from church and I turn the water on to boil. Once it starts boiling, I pour the pasta in and look at my cell phone. 9:32pm
I stir while talking to Tabitha and Timothy. I have the garlic bread (which I bought at Piggly Wiggly) sitting beside me on the baking sheet. I ask Tabitha, "How long to toast the bread?"
She said, "Till it's brown. It should take about 4 to 5 minutes on broil."
So, looking at my cell phone again, I pop the bread in the oven at 9:37 and turn the broil on (no preheating). Two minutes later (at 9:39) I tell my roommate to start heating up the sauce and shrimp that I had set on the back burner. After a minute, Tabitha asks, "What's burning?"
I check my noodles, it's not them. She quickly checks the sauce. She notices smoke coming up from the eye and she says, "Ah, must be something on the eye
that's burning. Man, the fire alarm is going to go off with all this smoke." The fire alarm does go off and she and Timothy run to open the doors and let Tropical Depression Ida clear the house.
So it's 9:41 and I'm draining my noodles. I'm noticing the smoke doesn't seem to be lessoning. I look back at the stove and think, "What the hell? The green beans are burning! Smoke's rising up from them? And damnit, smoke's coming from the sause?!?"
So I turn off the stove and Tabitha shouts, "The smoke's coming from the oven!"
I open the oven and there's a tiny burst of flame. The bread is black as coal and one of them is on fire! Tabitha shouts, "Get it out April!" But Timothy beats me to it. He gets a potholder and pulls it out. I'm getting a glass of water to pour on them cause I figure we'd be throwing them in the trash and want to douse them before doing so. Tabitha tells Timothy, "Just blow it up and take it outside so the smoke alarm will go off."
He walks outside with them and Tabitha and I about die laughing. We're both leaning on the wall, holding our sides because we're laughing so hard. I'm laughing now just thinking about it.
We're still laughing when he comes back in with an empty sheet. Tabitha tells him, "You're going to have to go pick them up and put them in the trash. We can't leave them outside for the land lady to find. And you better be lucky it's rained the past few days or you would have started a fire throwing them on the pinestraw."
So the rest of dinner was uneventful and the food was good. Tabitha and I would look at each other and crack up laughing. I've never made food catch on fire before, lol. We think something's wrong with the oven. I mean for bread to catch fire in 4 minutes on broil? Anyway, I thought it was pretty funny.
You, your sister, and your family will be in my thoughts/prayers. 
We're here for you if you need us.
And I've always wanted to be a character in a story.... 
You're officially welcomed to the thread.
