~ Love in Photographs ~
by Alex Tryst
Copyright © June 2002

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Disclaimers: See Part 1

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Part 4

Two summers later Helen was in New York on a photo shoot. Not a day went by that Helen didn’t think about the photographer and being in the city where she lived made it more difficult. She often wondered what Torrance was doing and hoped that the older woman was all right. Ever since Torrance had left her life, things hadn’t quite been the same. Helen had retreated away from most of her friends, preferring to stay in instead of going out with them, Kelly and Mark being the only two she spent a lot of time with. Most of her time was spent thinking about Torrance and what had happened between them. It hadn’t taken very long for Helen to start desiring to see the brunette, but knowing their separation had been her idea, she felt it best that she leave the tall woman in peace. The only time she had tried to contact the photographer was after the book had been released. Quite unexpectedly Helen had received a signed copy in the mail. There was no note attached, only an inscription thanking Helen for all her contributions to the book and wishing her well. Torrance had signed it with love, and it now sat on the coffee table where Helen saw it daily. When her offers for work began to multiply, she thought about sending Torrance a thank you note, and after much discussion with Mark and Kelly did so, hoping that Torrance would take that as enough motivation to contact her, but she never heard anything. That had been over a year ago.

As she left her shoot that day to head back to Philadelphia, her thoughts as usual were with the brunette. Walking with her head down out to the busy street of New York, she checked her watch to see how long she had before her train left. However suddenly she heard the unmistakable voice of the photographer. Jerking her head up, she saw the woman that had dominated her thoughts for the past two years standing in there with a young pregnant woman trying to hail a cab.

Helen was frozen as she watched Torrance open the back door of the cab before hugging the woman and rubbing her stomach in obvious affection. The blonde knew she shouldn’t have been eavesdropping, but her heart stopped when she heard Torrance telling the younger woman she would see her at home before bestowing a kiss on her cheek. Suddenly feeling the urge to run, Helen turned to go, but before she could even get two steps, she heard Torrance call her name questioningly.

Slowly Helen turned toward Torrance. “Hi, Torrance.” softly she stated looking into the face she still loved and noticing a faint scar along Torrance’s temple and specks of gray hair just above her ears but seeing that in almost every other way, the brunette was unchanged. It wasn’t until Torrance took a tentative step toward her that Helen observed a small limp.

“Hi. Funny meeting you here. In a city this large I never imagined this would happen. You working?”

“Yeah. I just finished a shoot. You?”

“I was just dropping a package off. How are you?”

“Fine. How are you?” nervously the blonde asked.

Torrance shrugged. “I’m okay I guess.”

There was an awkward pause before Helen mentioned, “I got the copy of the book you sent. That was nice of you. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome. I got your note. I’m glad things are working out well for you.”

Helen gave a nod. Not knowing what else to say, she mentioned, “Well, I should probably go.”

“Oh.” Torrance replied in obvious disappointment. “Well, it was nice to see you.”

“You too, Torrance.” she stated before turning to walk away. However as she turned her back on the photographer, she wanted nothing more than to stay. She was trying desperately to think of a reason to visit longer when she heard Torrance call her name again. Looking back she saw Torrance walk toward her.

“Listen, Helen, do you have time for a cup of coffee with an old friend?”

“Um... I thought you had business.”

“I’m just dropping something off, and then I was going to go across the street for some coffee. Would you like to join me?” As much as she wanted to, Helen had her reservations. Seeing Torrance with another woman had hurt her more than she had cared to admit. Noticing the blonde’s hesitation, Torrance gave a smile. “I’ll tell you what. I’m going to go upstairs, and then I’m going right over there for coffee.” she said pointing to the café across the street. “I would love to see you there, but if I don’t it was good to see you. You have about ten minutes to decide. Okay?” Helen gave a nod. Taking one long look at her, Torrance smiled softly saying, “Good bye, Helen.”

Helen watched Torrance enter the building before contemplating the offer. She had missed the photographer more than she had admitted to anyone. However seeing that Torrance was now involved with someone else made it difficult for Helen to see her, but her curiosity of what the photographer had been up to in their two years apart made Helen go across the street to wait.

Fifteen minutes later Helen was sitting at a back table anxiously eying the door for the brunette. Her heart pounded nervously wondering what she would say to the woman who she had grown to love even more through their time apart. As soon as she spotted Torrance enter the café, her breathing stopped momentarily as the tall woman flashed her a beautiful smile. Helen sat watching Torrance as she went over to the counter for a beverage. When Torrance came to the table, Helen saw how the older woman was favoring one leg as she walked.

“Well, I didn’t really expect you to be here, but I’m glad you are.” Torrance stated as she took a seat across the small table.

Helen took a nervous look out the window as she put on a brave front even though she could feel her hands beginning to sweat. “Well, I guess congratulations are in order, huh?” she mentioned lightly, even though her heart ached at seeing Torrance with her pregnant girlfriend.

“You mean the book? You had a lot to do with that. For the first year after that thing came out, I would get daily calls asking me about you, who you were and if you were available for sittings. I always just directed them to your agent. I don’t think I’ve ever had such a response to a piece of work as I have to your face being on the cover of my book.”

“Thank you for your referrals. I’ve had more offers than I can even deal with. I never thought at twenty-nine my modeling career would be on the upswing. It’s been a pleasant surprise. You didn’t have to do that.”

“Nonsense. You have something special about you, Helen, and they all see that. That’s why they ask about you. I just took a picture. They know the real beauty is in you.”

The blonde blushed at the compliment. “Thanks but I wasn’t actually talking about the book.”

Looking at her in confusion, Torrance asked, “Then what were you talking about?”

“You and your girlfriend... having a baby. It’s what you’ve always wanted.”

Torrance gave a light smile. “You mean Melissa? Oh, she’s not my girlfriend. She’s my cousin. She’s staying with me for awhile, because she’s been having some problems at home. I’ve agreed to help out with the baby. I wish I was that lucky though.” she mumbled.

“We all want to be that lucky as to find the right one.” Helen mentioned, but as soon as she said it, she knew it would hurt Torrance. Seeing the effect her words had on the older woman’s face, she quickly said, “I didn’t mean it like that, Torrance.”

The brunette shook her head. “It’s in the past, Helen. It should stay there.” she said more calmly than she felt.

Helen gave a nod in agreement. An awkward pause occurred in the conversation, but not wanting one comment to ruin their time, she asked, “So, how long has Melissa been living with you?”

“A couple of months. It’s been a real trial, but I’m sure you don’t want to hear about that.”

“Don’t be silly. I can see that it’s a serious matter to you. Please feel free to talk to me about it. I’m here for you.” Helen reached across the table instinctively to take Torrance’s hand.

Torrance looked out the window for a moment before looking back at the green eyes she loved. “Well, Melissa is seventeen and the daughter of my father’s youngest brother. Her whole life she’s been spoiled, and she’s gotten herself into some trouble with drugs. Now she’s pregnant, and her parents want nothing to do with her. It irritates me to no end that parents can feel that way toward their children. Anyway, she didn’t have anywhere to go, so I said she could stay with me. I’m helping her out for awhile, but today we got some bad news from the doctor. Melissa could lose the baby, because she’s been reckless during her pregnancy with drugs and alcohol, but assuming she could carry to term, the baby is going to have severe disabilities. I honestly don’t know what to do. She’s too young to be a mother, not to mention a mother of a child with special needs. She can’t even take care of herself.”

Helen nodded. Hesitantly she inquired, “So what are your options?”

“There are no options. I don’t believe in abortion, but even if I did, she’s too far along already. That choice is out. I know what will happen if she does have this kid. She’s going to continue down her destructive path, and I’m going to be the one trying to care for them both. I don’t think I have it in me to do that, Helen, and I feel terrible about it. I mean privately I sometimes hope that she miscarries, so she can have another chance at life, and that’s wrong of me.”

“I don’t think so. Torrance, you have a kind heart. You’re doing more for her than anyone else ever has, but even you have your limits. It doesn’t make you less of a person. It simply makes you human. I don’t think I could ever do what you’re doing.”

“What’s even worse is that I don’t think she’s even clean now. She was so messed up on drugs, and then she swore to me when she moved in that she would clean up, but in my heart I know she hasn’t. I still think she’s using. I’m worried about her.”

“It’ll be okay, Torrance.” the blonde whispered.

They were quiet for a moment as Torrance just looked out the window, and Helen gazed at her. However after a moment Torrance looked down at the table to notice their hands still joined. Slowly pulling hers away, the photographer leaned back in her chair and stated, “Enough about me though. What’s been going on with you?”

Helen pretended not to be affected by the loss of contact. “Well, not much actually, just work. Kelly and Mark have decided to get married though.”

“Really? That’s great. When?”

“Early next year. Kelly asked me to be her maid of honor.”

“As you should be. Where are they holding it?”

“In Philly. It should be fun. They’ve been together for long enough.”

“What’s going to happen with your living situation then?”

Helen shrugged. “I’m going to get a new place I guess. Even if they moved out, I couldn’t afford to live there alone.” After another pause Helen asked, “May I ask what happened to you? How did you get this scar?” She reached across the small table to lightly finger the brunette’s temple.

Instinctively Torrance leaned into the caress. “Um, I was in an accident. That just proves that people in their thirties can still be stupid.”

“What kind of accident?”

“I was thrown out of a second story window face first. My arms took most of the glass, but I still had some cuts on my face.”

“Oh my God. Is that how you got your limp too?”

Torrance nodded. “Yeah. I had several broken ribs and a broken leg. I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“When did this happen?”

“Uh, it was about six months after you and I stopped speaking.”

“Oh. I wish I could’ve been there for you. I’m sure that was a difficult time.”

“Well, it’s in the past.” Torrance mumbled. The two of them sat there the rest of the afternoon while the world passed outside the window. Finally Torrance looked down at her own watch and mentioned, “You know, it’s getting late. If you still have time before your train, I would love it if you would join Melissa and me for dinner.”

Helen consulted her own watch, noting that she had long missed her train, but not telling Torrance that, she just smiled and replied, “I’d love that too.”

“Great. Shall we go then?”

Going out to the street, Torrance hailed a cab for them, but with commuter traffic, they didn’t arrive back to Torrance’s building for another hour. When they arrived on the photographer’s floor, they both heard loud music coming from the direction of the brunette’s apartment. Casting a quizzical look at the blonde, Torrance led them down to her door. It was ajar, so Torrance pushed it open and stepped inside. Fearing the worst, she made her way through the entry toward the kitchen where she heard voices. When she stepped into the room, she saw her kitchen littered with empty bottles of liquor as well as an assortment of drugs on her bar as a pack of adolescent hoodlums talked amongst themselves.

“Oh my God.” Helen whispered under her breath taking Torrance’s hand.

Not seeing her cousin among the kids, Torrance yelled, “Excuse me! What in the hell are you doing in my apartment?”

They all turned to look at her. One of the older looking boys stepped forward as he commented, “Well, Missy’s dyke cousin is home, and look what she has with her.”

Ignoring the slur Torrance asked, “Where is Melissa?”

“She’s upstairs with Brad.” he stated. “You want some?” he inquired holding the joint out to her.

Knowing Brad to be the father of Melissa’s baby, the brunette felt her anger get the better of her. “This party if over people! Everybody out now!”

“Chill out now. There’s no need for that.”

“Maybe you didn’t hear me clearly! I said get your drugs and your alcohol, and get the hell out of my loft now!” she screamed grabbing the guy by the shirt. “You have ten seconds before I’m calling the cops!” Torrance watched as Melissa’s friends left her place before going after her cousin. Running up the spiral staircase with Helen right after her, Torrance barged into Melissa’s room. Seeing Melissa and her boyfriend in bed together, Torrance charged over to them. “I’m going to fucking kill you!” she yelled yanking Brad out of bed and throwing him against the wall. “Haven’t you done enough? She’s already pregnant because of you!”

“Torrance, stop.” Helen stated from the open door. “Something’s wrong with Melissa.”

Torrance turned to the bed to see her cousin lying there completely still. Forgetting Brad for the moment, she returned to the bed and dropped to her knees. “Melissa, wake up.” she stated shaking her by the shoulders. Getting no response, she shook harder. “Melissa, wake up dammit!”

“I’m calling an ambulance.” Helen said seeing that Torrance couldn’t bring her around.

Torrance felt herself losing control as she turned her anger on Brad again. Shoving him roughly against the wall a second time and grabbing him by the throat, she screamed, “What did you give her?”

“I didn’t think it would hurt her, honestly.” he stated panting for air.

“You tell me what she took now!” she demanded grabbing him between the thighs. He groaned painfully. “You better tell me or else I’ll make sure you’re never with another woman as long as you live! Tell me!”

“I’ll tell you. Please just don’t hurt me.” he begged.

“Well?” she yelled.

“Heroine. I didn’t think she would OD.”

Torrance released him enough to push him toward the door. “Get the fuck out! I never want to see you again!” she bellowed going back to her cousin. She checked her vital signs.

Moments later Helen reappeared. “Any change?” she softly inquired coming into the room.

“No. Her pulse is weak and breathing shallow. This is not good.”

“The ambulance is on it’s way. I’ll go wait to let them in.” she gently said.

Once she was alone, Torrance looked at her cousin just lying there. “Dammit, Melissa. I never should’ve left you alone.” she stated.

It seemed like forever until the ambulance arrived. As they rushed to take Melissa to the hospital, Torrance grabbed Helen by the hand and dragged her out to the ambulance as well. Just as they were about to get in, the EMT stated, “Only family is allowed to ride with us.”

“We’re both family. Now get out of my way.” Torrance growled. “Come on, Helen.”

As they rode to the hospital, Helen embraced the older woman as Torrance just cried. However once they got there, they were forced to wait. Guiding the brunette over to the corner of the waiting room, Helen sat her down and pulled Torrance into her arms. Neither said anything for awhile as Torrance just quietly cried herself into an exhausted light sleep. As Helen sat there gently stroking Torrance’s short dark hair, she prayed desperately that Melissa be all right for Torrance’s sake. She knew the older woman felt responsible for what had happened.

After a few hours the doctor asked to speak with them. As Torrance and Helen followed him into a private room, Helen squeezed Torrance’s hand tightly in support. “Well, I have to say that Melissa is an extremely lucky young lady this evening. She did overdose, but we were able to save her.”

“Oh, thank God.” Torrance sighed in relief.

“However I am sorry to report that she has lost her baby. It was hard enough to keep her with us, but we had to make a choice. There was just no way we could’ve saved them both. I’m sorry.”

Torrance gave an absent nod. “But Melissa will be okay?” she clarified.

“Yes, she should be fine and able to go home tomorrow night or the following morning depending on when she comes around. Right now she is unconscious but stable. She’s being taken to her room now. You can see her if you’d like.” Torrance gave a nod. “Okay, I’ll have the nurses get you when she’s ready.”

“Thank you, doctor.” Torrance whispered. He nodded before turning to leave them. Looking at Helen Torrance reached for her instinctually, and Helen allowed Torrance to embrace her as the older woman cried in relief.

“Come on. Let’s go to her room.” softly Helen suggested leading Torrance by the hand out to the nurses’ station to find out where Melissa was being moved.

When they arrived at the teenager’s room, Torrance sunk down in a chair next to the bed as Helen stood next to her with a consoling arm on her shoulder. The photographer sparred a look up at Helen as she mentioned, “I’m sorry you got dragged into this.”

“It’s all right. I’m glad I could be here for you.”

“I guess we made you miss your train. I’m sorry. You could probably still catch a late one.”

“I’m not going anywhere. I want to be here for you.”

“Well, I’m going to stay here with Melissa the rest of the night. Why don’t you at least go back to my place and get some rest? The least I could do is put you up for the night.”

Helen shook her head. “I want to stay here with you, Torrance. I don’t want you to have to be alone right now.” Torrance gave a nod in agreement, so Helen pulled up the other chair next to the photographer’s, and they were silent the rest of the night.

The following morning when Torrance awoke she felt arms around her and a head on her shoulder. Opening her eyes she noticed that Helen had curled up into her sometime during the night, but the teacher was sleeping soundly. Looking over toward the bed, she saw Melissa’s dark eyes just staring at them. “Melissa.” Torrance softly called out, gently maneuvering Helen off of her. Leaning over to the bed, Torrance took her cousin’s hand.

Melissa’s eyes watered. “Please don’t hate me, Torrance.”

“I don’t hate you, Melissa. I never should’ve left you alone after the news we got. I love you, but you scared me so badly.”

The teenager nodded. “I’m sorry.”

“I know. The doctors said you would be fine though.” Pausing for a moment, the brunette continued, “I have to tell you though that due to what happened, you lost the baby, Melissa. I thought you should hear that from me instead of the doctors.”

“Oh.” Melissa mumbled. Looking over at the blonde, she curiously inquired, “Who’s that?”

Torrance gave her first smile as she glanced at the sleeping woman. “That’s Helen. She can sleep through anything. I better go tell the nurses you’re awake. We have so much to talk about, but I first want to know when you can get out of here.”

Later that day Melissa was cleared to go home, so Torrance left her cousin under Helen’s watchful eye as she went home to get her car. As the three of them got back to the loft, Melissa saw the destruction that had been caused. “Oh, Torrance, my friends ruined your place.” she whispered.

“I know, but that won’t happen again, because they aren’t coming back. They aren’t your real friends anyway. Now come on. You need to rest. Let me help you upstairs.” Torrance assisted her up the staircase and led her to the master bedroom since Melissa’s room was still a wreak from the previous night. Helping her cousin into pajamas, Torrance settled her in the bed before kneeling beside her. “You try to get some sleep. I’m going to start cleaning up the mess downstairs and in your room.”

Melissa nodded. “Torrance, I really am sorry. Please let me stay here with you.”

“Do you truly mean that, Melissa?”

“Yes.”

“All right. You can stay, but there are going to be some changes. You’re going to get clean. No more drugs. Do you hear me?”

“Yes. I want to stop, Torrance. I really do.”

“Okay and I’m going to help you. For now though, get rest. I’m going to clean up your room. If there are any drugs in there, I want you to tell me now. If I go in there and find them without you telling me where they are, I’m going to be upset.”

“They’re in the night stand.” Melissa mumbled.

“All right. Go to sleep.”

Torrance went into her guest room that was serving at Melissa’s quarters and began rummaging through her belongings looking for drugs. Finding them in the bedside table as her cousin had said, Torrance flushed them in the bathroom before going back to straighten up her room and change the sheets. When she was finished, she took a peek in on the teenager to see that she was sleeping. Going downstairs she found Helen in the kitchen cleaning.

“Hey. Is she asleep?”

“Yeah. You don’t have to do that. I’ll get it.”

“No. Don’t worry about it. You’ve been through a lot too. It’s the least I could do for you. Just sit down. I’ll finish this and then make you something to eat. I know you haven’t had anything in at least twenty four hours. You must be starving by now.”

“I am a little hungry.” Torrance conceded. “You don’t have to cook though. I’ll just order some Chinese. I could at least feed you for kidnaping you the last day and a half.”

“I wanted to be here.” Helen mentioned making Torrance give a small smile.

By the time their dinner arrived, Helen had finished with the kitchen. Torrance took the liberty of setting up her bistro table out on the balcony for them, so once the kitchen was clean, they both sat down to their meal. “This is nice.” Torrance stated. “After all that’s happened the last two days it’s nice just to be here sitting still.”

“I’m sure it is. It’s been rough for you. You deserve a break.”

“You’ve made it bearable, Helen. Thank you for being here.”

“It was my pleasure. So, what are you going to do with Melissa now?”

“I was thinking that rehab is the best way to go. I think it’s the only way she’s going to have a chance at staying clean. It’s going to be a long road. Staying off drugs is a tough battle.”

“Sounds like you speak from experience.” Helen said.

“I do. When I was her age, I was just as wild and dangerous. Hell if I had been into guys instead of girls, I probably would’ve been pregnant too. I’ve been in her shoes, and it took a near fatal accident and a caring person to make me see the light.”

“What happened to you?”

“I was twenty two, just out of college. My girlfriend at the time and I had gotten high, and I wanted to go out joyriding. I stole my grandfather’s Ferrari, and the two of us went cruising. I nearly killed us both by running it into a tree.”

“Oh my God.”

“Yeah. I was a real hellion. My grandfather could’ve been upset about the car, but he sat by my hospital bed everyday until I recovered. We had a lot of talks during that time. He told me one time that he wouldn’t have been able to handle it if I had killed myself. He was genuinely concerned about my well-being, and he’s the reason I went into rehab. I didn’t want to hurt him any more than I already had. It is a long road, but now it’s time I return the favor he gave me by being there for Melissa.”

Helen just sat looking at her companion across the table as her admiration grew for the photographer. Knowing that Torrance had struggled for her success made Helen regard her even more highly for attaining her goals. “You really are something else, Torrance.” she said. “Melissa is lucky to have you.”

“Well, I hope I’m enough. Her family wants nothing to do with her, and it’s hard enough at that age to think that no one cares, but when you need your family’s support and don’t have it, things can seem impossible.” As their meal came to a close, Torrance inquired, “So, what’s your plan? Are you going to try to go back tonight?”

“I wasn’t planning on it if that’s okay with you. It’s getting late.”

“I think you should stay here. That can be a long trip on the train, and it is late. You’d be better off staying the night.”

“I don’t want to impose though.”

“Oh please. You could never impose. The least I could do is give you a bed to sleep in. In fact I probably could even do better by offering you my jacuzzi tub. You could have a soak, and I could wash your clothes, so you have something clean to wear in the morning. What do you think?”

“That’s tempting. I could use a bath. I bet I look a mess.”

“Never. You always look beautiful.”

The blonde blushed. “Perhaps we should take these dishes inside.” she suggested changing the subject.

Torrance nodded in agreement, so they took everything inside. “Well, just let me take care of these, and then I’ll go upstairs and move Melissa, so you can have privacy up there.”

“Why don’t you go ahead with that? I’ll get these.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. Go on.” Helen said lightly shooing Torrance from the kitchen.

The brunette made her way upstairs to her room. Gently waking Melissa she assisted the teenager to her own room before going into the master bath. Wanting everything to be perfect for Helen, she arranged candles around the tub along with an assortment of bath oils and bubbles. Getting a new towel out of the cabinet, she laid it out for the blonde as well as hanging her robe where Helen could reach it. By the time she returned downstairs, the model was finished with the dishes. “Your bath awaits.” Torrance stated. She led the way up to the bathroom and opened the door for the teacher. “I hope you find this to your liking. If you just leave your clothes here, I’ll get to them. Have a good soak.”

Helen thanked her before she was left alone. Closing the door, Helen went over to the tub and started the water. She looked around the bathroom as she began to undress. The atmosphere that Torrance had set was romantic and thoughtful, making the blonde’s heart ache all the more for the woman the she still loved. Taking a seat on the edge of the tub, Helen studied all the products Torrance had laid out for her use before adding some lavender oil to her bath. Shedding all her clothes into a pile, Helen slipped into the warm water and laid her head against the bath pillow Torrance had left for her. Her thoughts went to the brunette. She wondered might’ve happened had they become a real couple. Helen imagined that the photographer would be there in the tub with her wrapped in her arms. Helen longed for another chance to be what Torrance wanted in her and contemplated a way to get the older woman back in her life as she closed her eyes. The lack of quality sleep was making her tired as she relaxed, and it was only moments before her exhausted body gave into to its need for rest.

Torrance waited downstairs for over an hour flipping through the tv channels, but her mind was with the woman now in her tub. She longed to be up there with the blonde, but knowing a relationship was not meant to be, Torrance stayed where she was on the couch until she began to get concerned when Helen didn’t reappear. Wondering if something was wrong, Torrance went up to the master bath and knocked, but there was no answer. Cracking the door slightly, the photographer called Helen’s name, but when there was no reply, Torrance opened the door all the way to find Helen asleep in the tub. Torrance just stood in the doorway for a moment staring at Helen’s nakedness. When they had been together in Italy, Torrance had never gotten a chance to see the blonde’s body, because she had come to her under the cover of night, but now that the brunette saw the model in all her glory, she was mesmerized by her beauty.

Knowing Helen’s tendency for heavy sleep, Torrance wondered what she should do. Resolving to take care of the blonde’s clothes first, she picked them up and took them to her laundry room. When she returned Helen was still passed out, so the older woman decided to pull the drain plug to see if the would wake the younger woman. However as Torrance knelt next to the tub watching the water disappear, Helen still didn’t stir. Figuring she couldn’t let her stay there, Torrance decided she would try to get the blonde into bed. Going out into her room, Torrance pulled back the covers and laid her terry cloth robe out. Then she went back into the bathroom and gently lifted the teacher from the tub. Helen automatically curled in tighter, nuzzling Torrance’s neck in her sleep. Torrance took her to the room and softly laid her out on the bed. Torrance let her eyes gaze over the model’s bare frame for a few minutes more before regretfully closing the robe and pulling the covers over her. Brushing back a lock of short blonde hair, Torrance gave into her desire to kiss the younger woman, placing her lips delicately against her forehead. Helen mumbled Torrance’s name in her sleep, making the photographer’s heart skip a beat at the thought of the younger woman dreaming of her.

When Helen awoke later that night, she didn’t know where she was at first. Reaching for the bedside table, she found a lamp and clicked it on, revealing that she was in Torrance’s bed, but the brunette was no where to be seen. Curious as to where she was, Helen slipped out of bed and made her way toward Melissa’s room. She saw that the teenager was sleeping soundly alone. Hearing the tv from downstairs, the model went to the upstairs landing and looked down over the railing into the living room. There Torrance was on the couch asleep with the tv still on. Going down the stairs, Helen went to turn the tv off before looking at the photographer. Torrance was in a white t-shirt and men’s cotton pajama pants with one arm behind her head as Helen had seen her sleep before. Her blanket had fallen to the floor, so Helen went to retrieve it. However instead of covering Torrance with it, she put her hand on the brunette’s shoulder. Instantly the older woman’s green eyes opened.

“Helen? You need something?” she yawned.

“Come on. You’re coming to sleep upstairs with me.” Helen softly instructed taking Torrance by the hands to help her off the couch. Torrance offered no resistance as the blonde led her up the winding stairs and down the hall to the master bedroom. Taking Torrance to the bed, Helen guided her down into it, and Torrance was sound asleep again before she was even completely settled. Wrapping the brunette in the covers, Helen went to the dresser to find herself more appropriate sleeping attire before joining her friend in sleep.

In the morning Torrance awoke to someone whispering her name. As she opened her eyes, she realized her arms were around a sleeping blonde. Hearing her name again, she looked over toward the bedroom door to she Melissa standing there. “Torrance, I don’t feel well.” she whispered.

“All right. Come on.” Torrance stated sliding out of bed and escorting her cousin from the room., knowing that teenager was starting drug withdrawal.

Helen awoke about an hour to horrible screaming. Instantly panicking she raced to Melissa’s room to find Torrance holding it closed at Melissa frantically tried to get out. “What is going on?” she inquired skeptically.

“Oh good. You’re up. I need you to go into my dresser and get the key for this room, so I can lock Melissa in here.”

“Lock her in? Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

“Yes. She’s started withdrawals, and she’s going to carry on until she gets out or wears herself out. I can’t hold this door closed forever. Please get me the key.” Torrance said much more calmly than she felt.

Helen did as she was asked. When Torrance finally got the door locked, she took a deep breath. “Torrance, are you sure you have to do this?”

“Trust me, Helen. This is for the best. She’s really angry at me right now, because she needs a fix, and I won’t let her have one.”

“But she could hurt herself.”

“Well, I tried to get everything out of her room yesterday that could be harmful to her, because I knew this was coming. It’s going to get worse until I can get her into rehab somewhere. I’m only locking her in while I make some calls and get dressed. Watch this door for me while I’m in the shower. No matter what she says or does, don’t unlock it, and if for some reason she does get out, come get me immediately. I have to take a quick shower, because I haven’t bathed in days. It’ll just take me a little bit.”

“Okay. Sure. Whatever you say.” the blonde answered staring at the door as Melissa began to throw things against it.

Torrance quickly showered and dressed and then kept watch as Helen did the same. By the time the model was finished, all was silent making Torrance hope that Melissa had worn herself out for the time being. Going downstairs Helen made them breakfast as Torrance started calling around to try to find a place to take her cousin. After several hours and calls by both of them, Torrance finally found a facility that would treat all of Melissa’s needs. Calling Melissa’s parents she got her mother to agree to meet them in order to check Melissa in. When everything was arranged, Torrance took a deep breath. “Well, now for the hard part. I’ve got to go upstairs and get Melissa ready to go.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Helen asked.

“You just being here is a great help. I’m going to go up and get her things together. If you don’t mind, I’m going to have you drive my car in case I have to restrain her during the trip.”

“All right. Whatever you need.”

“Great. Get yourself ready to go, because as soon as I bring her down those stairs, we’re out of here.”

Half an hour later Torrance came down the stairs pushing Melissa in front of her. Helen noticed that Torrance had gotten a black eye somehow from all the banging she had heard upstairs, but she didn’t mention it as she helped get the teenager to the car. The ride to the center was incredibly long as Helen and Torrance had to endure all the vulgar nasty slurs that Melissa threw at the older woman. The fight continued all the way through the check-in process at the rehab facility, and Melissa’s mother hardly helped at all, obviously irritated that she even had to be there.

Finally once Melissa had been settled into her room, Torrance led Helen out to the car. “Are you all right? She said a lot of not so nice things to you.” the blonde inquired seeing Torrance quiet demeanor as they drove away from the center.

“I’m all right, just tired. She didn’t mean what she was saying. Those were the drugs talking. It can be really hard to physically need a fix and not be able to get it. Addicts will do just about anything to get their craving met. It’s part of the process. I know she doesn’t mean it.”

“She must have really knocked the fire out of you to give you a black eye.” Helen mentioned.

“Yeah, she got me good. I had forgotten about that ring she always wears. I had managed to take all the other potentially harmful things out of her room, but somehow that one got by me, and I paid for it. Melissa’s a tough one, but I’m tougher. She never stood a chance against me.” Coming to the end of the driveway of the scenic institution, Torrance turned to the teacher. “Well, could I convince you to have dinner with me before I take you home?”

“You don’t have to take me home. I can take the train.”

“We’re almost half way there. I might as well drive you.”

“As long as you promise to spend the night there. I don’t want you driving all the way there just to turn around and go back to New York.”

“Fine. You have a deal.”

It was late when they arrived back at Helen’s apartment. As they came in, they saw Mark and Kelly sitting on the couch watching tv. “Torrance, what a surprise. How are you?” Kelly inquired.

“I’m good. I hear congratulations are in order on your engagement. I think that’s great.” she said smiling at the two of them.

“Why don’t you sit down?” Helen suggested gesturing to a chair. Torrance walked over and took the seat, but Helen noticed the older woman gingerly moving, indicating to her that even though Torrance didn’t admit it, Melissa had hurt her during their skirmish.

“So, Torrance, you look like you’ve been in a fight. What happened?” Mark asked conversationally.

“Oh, I wouldn’t take no for an answer.” she joked lightly. Kelly and Mark both gave Helen a confused glance.

“Torrance, I know I can’t offer you a jacuzzi or anything, but I noticed you were favoring your back. Are you hurting? Would you like to soak in my tub? It might help, and then I could give you a back rub.”

“That might not be such a bad idea. Melissa gave me a run for my money when I had to wrestle her to the floor. A hot bath might help.”

“All right then. Come on. Let me help you up.” Helen offered taking the photographer’s hands. Helping her from her seat, the blonde led Torrance off to the bathroom. “I’ll get you something to wear to bed. Maybe after you soak I can give you a massage, so you’ll sleep better.”

Leaving Torrance alone Helen went back to where her roommates were. “Mark, do you have something Torrance could sleep in?” she asked.

“Sure. Feel free to grab whatever.” he stated.

“Are you going to tell us what’s going on, Helen? We get a call from you a few days ago that you ran into Torrance and were staying with her a few days. Now she shows up here like she’s had the tar beaten out of her. What is going on?”

“I’ll tell you. Just let me get her some pajamas first. I’ll be right back.”

Torrance was sitting on the edge of the tub trying in vain to get her shoes off, because her back had decided to stick on her when there was a knock at the door. “Yeah?”

“It’s just me. I have something for you to wear.”

“Oh, come on in.” Torrance mumbled.

When Helen entered and saw the brunette sitting there obviously in pain. “You all right? Do you need help?”

Even though Torrance didn’t want Helen’s help, she knew she didn’t have a choice in the matter. “My back is stuck. I can’t move.” she stated.

“Oh. Well, let me help you.” Helen replied coming to the brunette and kneeling in front of her. Gently she removed Torrance’s shoes and socks before helping her stand. “Do you need help with your shirt too?”

“No, thanks. I’ll be fine.” Torrance responded, even though she knew it would be difficult to do alone, but having the blonde so near was making her heart ache, so she rather go it alone.

“All right. If you need anything else, let me know.”

Going back out into the living room, Helen dropped into a chair and gave a long sigh. “Well, so, what’s up with you and Torrance?” Mark inquired softly.

“This has been the strangest three days. When I was in New York for my shoot, I accidentally ran into her on the street. At first I wasn’t sure that I wanted to see her, because she was with her pregnant cousin Melissa, but I at first thought it was her girlfriend. I just thought it would be weird, but she caught me before I could get away, and I’m now glad she did. We went for coffee and had a long talk. It was really nice. She invited me to dinner with she and her cousin, but that’s when all hell broke loose.”

“What happened?” Kelly asked.

Helen paused for a moment before stating, “I don’t really want to get into details, because Torrance trusts me with her family’s problems, but I’ll just say that Melissa has some serious issues. She ended up having to go to the hospital. We were there all night and most of the next day. Then today Torrance and Melissa got into a fight, which is how she got the black eye, because Torrance had to put Melissa into a facility that could care for her needs, and Melissa didn’t want to go. Torrance really is a saint for putting up with that when the rest of the family turned their back on Melissa.”

“What happens now? Are you two going to be friends?” asked Kelly.

“I hope so, but we haven’t talked about it or anything.”

Back in the bathroom, Torrance had managed to work open her pants and step out of them even though pains shot through her back with the slightest movement. Putting on the pajama bottoms Helen had brought her, she took a deep breath trying to control herself from whimpering in pain. Next she slowly opened the buttons of her shirt, but as she tried to slip it over her shoulders, she groaned loudly in frustration of the agony. Muttering to herself angrily she realized that she was going to have to get assistance, but before she could even more to the door to call for help, there was a knock.

“Torrance, you okay? Do you need help?” Helen softly asked.

“Yeah. I can’t get my shirt off.” she quietly admitted.

“Why don’t I come in and help you?” the blonde suggested waiting at the door for Torrance’s agreement before entering. When she came in, Torrance was standing with her back to the door. “Here.” she stated reaching for the photographer’s shoulders. Helen eased the cotton shirt down Torrance’s back revealing the strong muscles underneath. “Did you still want to take that bath?” she inquired.

“No. I’m not sure I’ll be able to get in the tub much else out of it in this condition, and I’m not really up to having Mark see me naked when he has to pull me out.” the older woman teased.

Helen nodded barely resisting the urge to look in the mirror and catch a glimpse of the front of the brunette as focused strictly on helping Torrance put on her clean shirt. “Well, let me get you settled into bed, and I’ll give you a massage. Hopefully that will help.” Escorting Torrance into her bedroom, Helen eased the older woman down onto the bed. “Here. Let’s get you turned over.” she mentioned trying to get Torrance onto her stomach.

“This really isn’t necessary, Helen. I’ll be fine.” Torrance stated.

“No. I want to do this for you. It’s obvious you’re in a great deal of pain, and if I can help you get rid of it, I’m going to. Now turn over.” she demanded gently. Torrance complied with the request, easing herself onto her front. “Good girl.” the blonde said giving the photographer’s bottom a playful pat.

The model’s hand against her posterior felt like fire to Torrance. She hadn’t expected such a touch, but she did her best not to react to it as she tried to make herself comfortable. Just when she began to relax, the teacher started to lift the hem of her shirt making Torrance tense. “Is that really necessary?”

“Trust me, Torrance. It’ll be better this way. I can get to your muscles easier. You don’t mind if I use lotion on you, do you?” she inquired casually.

“I guess not.” the brunette replied softly wondering what she had gotten herself into.

Helen went to her dresser and picked up a bottle of lotion before coming back to the bed. Casually she straddled Torrance’s hips and began to lather the liquid in her hands to warm it. Torrance tried to focus on anything but the fact that she was now between the legs of the woman she loved as the blonde began to rub her back, but the photographer couldn’t help notice that whenever Helen would press harder, her thighs would strain against Torrance’s and her hips would undulate sexily into her. It wasn’t long before the pain in her back was forgotten as she concentrated on the feel of the woman rhythmically riding her as the pressure of the massage increased. Instinctively Torrance’s body responded matching the movement of the blonde’s hips. Helen dedicated so much of her attention to easing Torrance’s pain that she never realized what she had started to do until she heard Torrance take a ragged breath. Then suddenly it struck her that the woman she had fantasized about over the past two years was exactly where Helen had longed for her to be and whimpered slightly as the older woman’s backside brushed against the apex of her thighs sensually. Helen didn’t stop however as she kept kneading Torrance’s strong back muscles pressing deeper with each quick breath. Torrance moaned at the feeling of Helen’s body on top of hers, but she knew they shouldn’t be moving so quickly if they were ever going to have any sort of relationship again. Regretfully Torrance slowly turned over and looked up into the green eyes of her beloved who still sat straddled across her. She saw Helen’s flushed face and erratic panting and knew without a doubt that they were feeling the same. It would have been so easy to lean up and kiss the woman she loved, and her body screamed for her to do just that as Torrance’s slid her hands onto the blonde’s hips. Instantly the teacher froze, fearing what the older woman might say or do in reaction to her behavior. There was a quiet moment between them as they just stared at each other.

“My back feels better. Thanks.” Torrance stated as evenly as possible.

Helen nodded and exhaled slowly relieved that at least for the moment it looked like the photographer would let the incident pass. Dismounting from Torrance’s hips, Helen answered, “Good. I’m glad. Now let’s just get you settled in for the night. I’m going to go get ready for bed myself. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Gathering up her night clothes, Helen made a quick retreat from the room. She took her time in the bathroom preparing for bed as she thought about the woman in her bed. Helen knew it had been a lie when she told Torrance she didn’t feel the same when they had returned from Italy. She had been in love with the photographer, but she had been so ashamed for forcing their relationship too fast and hurting the brunette that she felt it best to not to continue. The blonde had been confused by her anxiety about touching Torrance sexually then, but as her body clearly displayed just moments ago she had moved beyond that. It had felt exhilarating to touch the older woman knowing she had elicited her responses, and she wanted nothing more to go in there and pick up where they had left off, but she knew it wouldn’t be right. Wondering how she would make it through the night sleeping next to her, Helen made her way out of the bathroom. However she made a quick detour to the kitchen for a drink to stall for a few minutes. Getting a bottle of water from the refrigerator, she came to where her roommates still were sitting and stared at them contemplatively.

“What’s wrong?” Kelly asked.

Helen shrugged. “Do you think I’m crazy for wanting to walk straight into my room and have that woman love me senseless?”

“What?” Mark inquired with surprise. “You want to have sex with her?”

Helen looked at Kelly questioningly to which her roommate just shrugged. “What? You told me not to tell anyone, not even Mark, so I didn’t.” she explained.

“Tell me what?” he asked.

Kelly looked at Helen, who nodded at her. Taking that as permission, Kelly stated, “Helen had sex with Torrance in Italy.”

“What? Are you kidding me? You really had sex with her?” he inquired in astonishment.

“Yeah, I did.”

“Well, how was it?” hesitantly he queried.

“There are no words to really describe it, Mark. It was like nothing I’ve ever experienced. It was beyond perfect.”

“Well, hell, if it was that good, get yourself back in there and get you some action.”

“Honey, it’s not that simple.” Kelly informed him patting him on the arm. “This is about much more than sex. We’re talking about two women, and not only that, they’re two women in love.”

He rolled his eyes. “Oh Lord, one woman in love is bad enough. Now we’ve got two in love with each other.”

“Are you in love with her again, Helen?”

“I still am. I never stopped, Kelly. I just said that because I was scared.”

Kelly smiled at her. “I knew that. It was so obvious that you did.”

“I want another chance, but I don’t want to blow it. I’ve never felt like this in my life, but I don’t know what to do.”

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, she still feels the same for you. That should make it a little easier.” Kelly told her.

Helen gave a uncertain nod before stating, “Well, I guess I’m going to go to bed. This will be a long night.”

“Just keep the noise down if you two do decide to jump each other. I’ve got an early meeting.” Mark joked.

Going back into her room, Helen saw that Torrance was already sleeping. Sliding into bed she extinguished the light before tenderly putting her head onto the brunette’s shoulder and closing her eyes. Torrance, who had only pretending to be asleep to avoid any awkwardness after the incident, smiled into the dark when she felt Helen curl up into her. Slowly she brought her arms around the blonde to hold her closely before dozing off.

The following morning when Torrance had to leave the two of them just stood at Helen’s door for a few minutes. “I just want to thank you again for all that you did for me, Helen. I’ll never forget your kindness. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.” she said touching the younger woman affectionately on the arm.

Helen blushed at the praise. “I’m just glad that I could be there for you. You are by far the most giving person in the world, Torrance, so it was nice to be able to return what you had given to me. You’ll let me know how Melissa is doing, won’t you?”

“If you’d like.”

“I would. I’m leaving for home today for a little vacation, but when I get back, I want a full report. Okay?”

Torrance nodded. “Sure.”

“And if something comes up in the mean time and you need something, I want you to call me at my parents’ house.”

“I don’t want to impose.”

“You won’t be. Please. It will make me feel better if I know you would call. Promise me?”

“All right. I promise to call if I need anything.”

“Good. Maybe when I get back we can find a time to have that dinner you promised me at the coffee shop?” she suggested hoping that Torrance would accept her attempt to be close to her again.

The brunette smiled. “I think that could be arranged. I should go now. You have to get going.”

Giving a smile Helen leaned in and hugged Torrance tightly for a few moments before saying, “I’ll see you when I get back.”

Continued Part 5

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