Part 3
Bellona reviewed the portion that was scribed in her place. She said nothing, rolled it up, and secured it with her seal. She told the queen she was in charge until her return. She would be gone for three days, delivering the scrolls to the council. Bellona gave her queen directions to follow in her absence regarding the care of Carissa and the boys. It was not necessary to follow the schedule to the letter, as it would be impossible. Accomplish what can be done and report to her the progress with the children.
Clarissant looked at the plans Bellona laid out for her, the tasks themselves not appearing difficult, however, that was not taking into account someone such as Carissa. Up to now, her majesty has only observed the events as they happened. Now, she must take part in the teachings of etiquette.
The dictionary defines etiquette as the practices and forms prescribed by social convention or by authority, or much more simply, socially correct behavior. The first item to be accomplished is to be sure that Carissa and the boys understand this definition, not just memorize it. The question now is...how to proceed. As in all things, starting from the beginning would be best, with something simple, such as greeting people.
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The boys were first, as the queen felt they would be the easiest to start with, Tobie in particular was very observant. His speech has much improved since he first came to live at the manor, and his time with Desdemona is proving to be time well spent. "Welcome to our house, the House of Andromeda. I am Tobias, how might I help you this day." All this is said in a perfect posture of hands clasped in the front, standing straight and tall, and with a gentle and welcoming expression. The queen stood there, pride and joy showing upon her face at Tobie's accomplishment. He smiles with pride as well after completing his tasks.
Tristan was a little more difficult. His thoughts were of play and other tasks to be done other than learning the lessons of etiquette. Eventually, though, he, too, was successful. "Welcome to the House of Andromeda. My name is Tristan. How can I help you?" It was not as thorough a greeting as Tobias, but that much was accomplished. The other items to be accomplished are his welcoming expression and changing that bored tone to one of interest and warmth. There is still time before Bellona returns, and by then, the queen's goal will be accomplished. "May the deity assist me with my next goal; the goal of teaching Carissa etiquette. Amen," she was heard muttering as she searched for Carissa.
Carissa spends most of her time with Sergasa, the captain of the guards, learning basic defensive skills. The plan is to substitute Carissa's opponent. One cannot expect to fight the same warrior in a true battle, so it is best to train with as many skilled warriors as possible to provide a more well-rounded education. The true test would be to wrestle with the sovereign, for whom there is no equal on all of Andromeda. Clarissant feels herself to be a competent warrior, as she has won many competitions. As Sergasa readies herself for the day, Clarissant prepares for battle with Carissa.
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It is mid-afternoon when the battle finishes, and the queen has found new respect for the young woman as she watched the match between Sergasa and Carissa. Carissa's first reaction when she first notices Clarissant is, "Hey! Who are you? Where'd the teacher go?"
"Good afternoon, Carissa, I am Queen Clarissant. Later we will begin our lessons on etiquette. Let us start this battle, shall we?"
"All right, you asked for it, queenie. Don't go cryin' to her royal highness for getting your ass whooped."
The queen could not help but laugh.
She definitely has spirit. "I will correct you later, and we shall see who beats whom, Carissa, who will beat whom. Let the battle begin."
She is a good warrior, and accomplishes the task of surprising the queen a few times. A stubborn sort, Carissa is, since she would not stay down, which is the reason the battle lasted as long as it did, and the reason why she walks a little strange. A good bath, a good tea, and a little time for reflection, and she is ready to begin her lessons. Anybody else would be tired of the beating, but the queen is a little hasty in her assessment. Carissa requests a rematch immediately after she finishes bathing. A firm reminder about there always being a time and a place for everything, and now was not such the time nor the place is given. There are etiquette lessons to learn, or more precisely, she needed to learn how to properly greet people.
"You greet people by saying hi or how're you doing? What is all this etiquette shit I have to learn? No one told me I had to do that."
"Then let me read you a letter that was given to me to help clarify your confusion. My dear Carissa, I will be away for three days, and during that time, my queen will be in charge. Follow her instructions to the letter. You are to do as you are told. I will ask for a progress report. Do not disappoint me, Carissa. You are a member of my court, therefore, must be able to represent me with poise, grace, and aware of the rules of etiquette that I will expect you to know. One last thing, Carissa . . . remember . . . someone will always be listening, so always choose your words carefully. Your lessons in speech and in the studies will begin upon my return. Sincerely yours, Sovereign of Andromeda, Bellona. Any questions, Carissa...?"
Carissa shakes her head back and forth, her face turning red. There seems to be a very interesting spot on the floor as well. The etiquette lessons finish for the day, with Carissa at least being able to speak the sentence without those ugly words. "Welcome to our House of Andromeda. I'm Carissa, and what do you need?" That was the best that could be accomplished by the end of day.
Lessons continued the following day, with the goal of being able to recite the proper greeting, proper stance, and a change in tone and expression.
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Tobie progressed quickly during that time. He not only was able to perfect the proper greeting, he was also able to memorize the table setting and seating chart, both formal and informal. He was also able to memorize our pledge to the Kingdom of Andromeda, and started learning the music as well as the dancing. Truly a remarkable child, though the queen suspected Desdemona had aided Tobie in these skills.
Tristan did, indeed, progress, I believe due to jealousy that his younger brother had progressed much further. His stance improved as well as his expression and his tone. He had memorized the informal table setting and seating chart, as well as the pledge. The formal table setting and seating chart as well as the music and dances were left for him to learn.
The next day we reviewed the formal table setting and seating chart. The music and dances will be left to learn at a later time.
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Carissa fell further behind the boys as the days passed. The greeting had just been perfected as the sovereign arrived. After reporting to the sovereign the progress made by the children, she immediately summoned for Carissa, not at all pleased with Carissa's behavior.
Carissa enters Bellona's study still with her clothes from the practice fields on. "Carissa, I left you specific instructions to follow your queen's orders, and yet you refused. Was there something that I missed in the letter? Should I have instructed my queen to place you in the sleeping chambers under armed watch until my return? Explain to me, why this is so, Carissa."
"You didn't miss anything . . . it just . . . that I . . . well . . ."
"I am waiting for you to answer, Carissa. I am growing impatient."
In a near whisper, "I'm sorry."
"You are sorry is your excuse? In that case, from this point forward, I will be your teacher in your studies, etiquette, and defensive skills. If I am not here at the manor, you will be kept in the sleeping chamber under armed watch until I return."
"But that's not fair! I didn't do nothing!"
"The correct word would be anything, and it is fair, since you chose not to listen to your queen. It is your actions that caused these consequences, Carissa."
"I'll do better, I promise. Look, I'll just apologize and I'll listen better."
"A promise is only worth something if there is the intention of keeping that promise."
"But, Bell . . ."
"It is Bellona. Proceed to the bathing chambers, there will be clothing left for you on the bench when you finish your bath. You have twenty minutes."
"But, Bell . . ."
"You have ten minutes."
"But . . ."
"Do you want five minutes?"
"No, I'll go now, you're royal bitchiness." Carissa is slow to leave the office. The sovereign is not a person to make angry.
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Immediately upon completing her bath, Carissa returns to the study to start over with her lesson in the proper greeting.
It is a hard morning for her, with being reminded constantly about proper stance and her tone. "Carissa, you may have been able to persuade my queen to overlook your inadequacies. I, however, will not overlook them. During the midday meal, I want you to review, in your head, everything that I have told you this morning. We will start again in one hour."
Carissa does something that no one would have anticipated. With a look of pleasure in her eyes, she strokes the sovereign in all the sensual places, even attempting to remove the dress. Bellona will have none of it, however. She simply turns around and ignores Carissa. "This isn't fair, you know that! You have me doing things that no one else does! So why should I, bitch! Tell me the fuck why!"
"After you return to me, not only will we work on your greeting, we will also work on your language skills. I suggest you leave now. You have thirty minutes left of your afternoon break."
Carissa, her hands clenched tight and arms straight, walks very briskly out of the office.
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She returns in half an hour, with glazed eyes as well as being a little, well, wobbly, would be the proper description. If anyone were to guess, she spent her afternoon break drinking.
Bellona is not pleased when Carissa returns to the manor.
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The queen is seen outside talking to a little squirrel. "I should have known her first day of learning would be a challenge, my little friend. She is a challenge. Whom am I talking about? You know whom, my little friend, it is Carissa. If she were to just sit down, settle down, and listen, then she would have an easier time going about her learning. Her willful pride, I believe, gets in the way and prevents her from learning what she needs to. Her mistake, I think, was walking in intoxicated after her break. Bellona is not at all pleased, not at all. Let me see what happens for the rest of the day, my little friend. Who knows, maybe everything will work out in the end. The day is not done yet, and I must go on about my business, until later, my friend."
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On Andromeda, there is a potion, which when properly administered, has the ability to flush all the intoxicants from the body. That would be the benefit of the potion. Someone might believe that upon learning about this potion everyone would be willing to carry this potion in drunken circumstances. There is a downside to this potion, though. It takes some time to start working, approximately four hours by the clock. After that time, the potion takes its toll. It is not a description appropriate for this scroll . . . just know that the person does not leave the bushes for quite some time, regretting the indulgence, vowing never to do that again for their entire lifespan. Bellona prepared this potion for Carissa to take, ridding her body of the intoxicant she had ingested. Lessons resumed and she seemed to make some progress, until the potion started working. A smile of victory graced our sovereign's face as Carissa ran for the closest lavatory. Knowing she would be there for a while, the sovereign scanned her library for the appropriate material to use for her lessons the following day.
Bellona has placed Carissa on a strict schedule, starting immediately at sunrise, and finishing the day at sunset. She is to awaken immediately at that time, followed by physical activities, bathing, and then a morning meal. It does take Carissa quite some time to awaken in the morning. However, the sovereign will not be denied. Ready to awaken or not, Carissa is taken out of bed at the appointed hour, usually with resistance.
"Look, whoever you are, go the fuck away, can't you see I'm sleeping?"
"Carissa, you will awaken now under your own power or I will make sure you will awaken. The choice is yours."
"No I won't. Goodnight."
"Very well, I did warn you."
It is at this time that the sovereign physically picks up Carissa to stand on her feet, holding her around the chest. When that does not succeed, a rather cold awakening is given, a rather cold and wet awakening in the form of a cold shower. Carissa opens her eyes with a feral look toward the sovereign.
The sovereign's only comment, "I did warn you."
Appropriate clothing is given to Carissa to wear for their morning routine.
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Bellona and Carissa run five miles first thing upon awakening, then lessons in the appropriate manner in which to communicate with a horse so that the rider and horse may work as one to fight the enemy. This is followed by lessons in defensive skills, hand-to-hand combat only. Weapon use requires advanced training that Bellona feels her consors does not need to learn.
Carissa enters the bathing pool soon after the sovereign, and her first etiquette lesson starts immediately. "Give me the soap, Bell."
Bellona does not respond, instead, continues to bathe herself, seemingly enjoying the water.
"Yo, Bell, give me the damn soap." Bellona still does not react to Carissa's request.
"Yoo hoo . . . Bell . . . give . . . me . . . the . . . soap." Out of frustration, Carissa splashes the water hard enough to splash Bellona. Now, Carissa has the sovereign's attention.
"Carissa, I am not only your instructor, I am also your sovereign. Due to the relaxed setting and the fact that we are not in the public arena, it is not necessary to address me as Sovereign Bellona. However, etiquette dictates that proper manners be used at all times, even while bathing. Start again with your request."
"Look, I'm sorry, okay. I'm hungry and tired, and all I want to do is to sit and . . ."
"Carissa, make your request again. I suggest you do so now before your skin resembles the texture of a prune."
"Ma'am, would you please pass the soap to me."
"Try again."
"What..?! I said please."
"I said try again."
Carissa stood there looking at the water before making her last attempt "Ma'am, if you would be so kind, may I please have the soap to wash myself."
"Much better, always remember tone, Carissa. Tone of voice has the ability to change a simple request into a direct order."
Carissa, finally with soap in hand, starts bathing herself clean.
After dressing, they proceed to the kitchen to get their morning meal. They are assured that their meal will be ready momentarily. Both sit down in the dining chamber, all seems to be well, however, Carissa is surprised at the platter that is placed in front of her. "Hey! What happened to my breakfast? This isn't what I want. I told them I wanna cheeseburger, not this healthy sh . . . um . . . stuff."
"Cheeseburger is not appropriate for the morning meal."
"It's what I want. I get what I want, and I want a cheeseburger." Carissa picks up her platter and starts to rise, angry that her request was not fulfilled. A hand grabbing her wrist stops her, however.
"As I said, a cheeseburger is not appropriate for the morning meal. On your platter there is whole grain bread, cheese, and cured meat from the northern territories, and fruits from the eastern territories. Eat as much as you can or not, the choice is yours, Carissa. In the goblet on your right, there is milk to drink."
"Who gave me this? I don't drink milk."
"I gave this platter to you, and you will start drinking milk because it is what is on that platter that will supply you with necessary nutrition."
"You did this?! I'm a big girl, and I get to eat what I want."
The sovereign looks Carissa straight in her eyes. It is that 'there will be no argument' tone that gets Carissa's attention. "Let me explain something to you very clearly, Carissa. When you are able to prove to me, without a doubt, that you are, indeed, capable of making decisions on your own, that is the time you will be able to request anything you desire. Until that time, I will be making decisions for you, starting with your diet."
Carissa sits back down and stares at her platter, poking at her food with her fork. Reluctantly, she starts eating the food, but leaves the milk. "Milk is junk. So I'll drink juice."
"Very well, you will have milk later to drink." The servant immediately removes the platter as they rose from the table to go to the study.
It will be speech lessons to begin with, because as a representative of the court of Andromeda, Carissa must be able to pronounce the words correctly, as well as being able to speak properly. The speech lessons will be the easiest for Carissa to learn. The rest, well, they are not as easy for her, as she is eighteen years old and cannot read or write.
"Look, I don't even know why I have to learn anyway. It won't do me any good." Carissa immediately stands up from the desk to peer through the window directly behind the desk.
"Carissa, everyone must learn these skills. Yes, you have a late start through no fault of your own, as responsibilities were pushed upon you beyond your capability. With time and practice, you, too, will learn these skills, but it will take time. Nothing will come easily without practice, Carissa. Let us start again from the beginning."
"Why? So you can tell me how stupid I am, that I can't take care of the boys?"
"The answer to the first question is because I want you to be able to care for yourself with confidence and with pride. In order to care for both yourself and the boys, you need to learn these skills. It is never too late to learn. It is better we start now instead of never trying. You are my consors, yes, as I have delivered the documents to the council. They viewed me as being mad for appointing someone that is uneducated. I reminded them that I am the sovereign, and I have a right to appoint anyone I desire to be my consors. What I did not tell them is that I had not lost my mind, only my heart to someone in whom I believe can become anything that they desire. You are young, Carissa, and if by chance should you change your mind and wish to leave me, then these skills that I am teaching you will become necessary. There are many other reasons that I am teaching you how to read, how to write, how to speak, and how to listen, the most important reason, though, is that I love you."
"I just can't because I'm stupid. It's just so hard."
"Everything is difficult in the beginning, but with time and practice, then these lessons will become less difficult. Let us begin again after you have an afternoon snack."
The afternoon snack was eaten without hesitation. The milk issue, well, she did take a sip at least.
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The boys came home after a long day at school. The queen was pleased to announce to the sovereign that Tobie did very well on a science project based on volcanoes. Tristan did very well as well on a report on a foreign country, the country of Spain to be exact, and earned extra points for preparing a dish from that country of origin. A pizza was agreed upon to celebrate this occasion.
The pizza was eaten, the boys bathed, and now it was time for slumber. Tobie always falls asleep without hesitation, while Tristan, well, he always takes time falling asleep, spending most nights telling a story of a strange superhero, the queen supposes based on his description. It is a tale of a Captain Underpants and the Closet Brigade. The sovereign finds these tales amusing, and is often heard laughing in her study. It is not difficult to overhear the story, because the house does echo, so intentional or not, everyone looks forward to listening to the tales of Captain Underpants and the Closet Brigade.
It always takes Carissa time getting ready for slumber. So many years of such atrocious activity for such a young child had conditioned her to stay awake when she should be slumbering. The sovereign told the queen that because Carissa had spent the first eighteen years of her life awake during a time that she should be slumbering, it would be impossible to condition her so soon to change her body clock. It will take time. In the meantime, everyone hopes that exhaustion will take its toll, to influence Carissa to sleep rather than stay awake. Eventually, her body clock did change. It took two months, but her body clock did change. Or did it?
Progress was seen in Carissa's manners as well as her studies. Everything seemed to be going quite well, that is, until one night . . .
Carissa got up from her bedding very carefully so as not to awaken anyone. I do not believe she expected me to hear her get up and be waiting for her at the doorway. It was one o'clock in the morning, and everybody else was still asleep. I was curious as to the reason my consors chose this time to awaken, as well as being angry for whatever reason she feels is necessary to awaken at this hour.
"Hello, Carissa, should you not be in bed slumbering? After all, it is one o'clock in the morning."
"Bell . . . um . . . what . . . how . . . look, Bell, I'll be back later." She attempted to leave by moving around me. I would not let her proceed.
"Bell . . . um . . . look . . . I . . . I'll just be out for a little while, you know? I'm sure you did this, right?"
"Where are you going, Carissa, that cannot wait until sunrise?" I had an idea, and based upon her history, expected. It did not prevent me from being disappointed, however.
"I'll just be back later, I promise. Now let me go before everyone wakes up."
"You just cannot stop, can you? You cannot stop yourself from reliving the role of becoming a toy for the men, can you? I had thought that after all this time I would be able to teach you to show you what it is to be accepted. You have proven me wrong. I cannot prevent you from leaving . . . but keep in mind, Carissa . . . that if you leave . . . you cannot come back."
We stood there looking at each other with only the light of the moon shining on us, until Carissa spoke.
"What do you want me to do? I have to support the boys, and it's the only thing I know how to do. It's an addiction that I can't stop. It's in me; my mother bred it in me. It's that fuckin' bitch's fault."
"It is not an addiction that you cannot stop, because you can. And stop using your brothers as an excuse. Go back to bed now, there are still a few hours left before it is time to rise." I watched her as she dragged her feet back to her bed, looking beaten and defeated. I must think of something to help her remove herself from her previous life. Maybe a move back to Andromeda is called for. It may be too soon, but for the lack of another solution, I do not know what else to do.
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The following morning, the sovereign brings the previous night's interaction to the attention of the queen. Clarissant thought that all previous behaviors or memories of the past would be left in the past. "My word, I shall pray for her tonight," the queen states. Luckily, the boys slept through the night and did not witness this.
Tristan approaches Bellona with a question when he returns from schooling. "Excuse me, Miss Bellona, could I ask you a question?"
Looking straight into Tristan's eyes with a gentle smile on her face, she replies, "Yes, Tristan, you may ask me a question. What is your question?"
"I was wondering if I could stay at my friend's house tonight, since today's Friday and all. We usually eat pizza and watch horror movies. Cari would let me. At least, she used to let me . . . Could I?"
"Tristan, I appreciate you approaching me with this before acting upon your desires. It worries me, though, that I do not know anything of the friend that you wish to stay with. It would not be your friend who would worry me; it would be your friend's parents or guardians who would worry me. I do not know them, Tristan. Taking care of someone else's child is a full responsibility. Do you know and understand what I am saying to you?"
"Look, I've done it before, and it's only the night. So can I?"
"Tristan, the answer to your request will be no, the reason is due to the fact that I am unfamiliar with this family."
"But, Miss Bellona . . . um . . . look . . . uh . . . just wait here and let me get Cari. She knows them. She would take us there tons of times."
As soon as Tristan leaves, the dear heart, Tobie, wanders in, looking a little down trodden. "Hi, Bellona, what are you doing?" His chin barely reaches the top of the desk. He looks so adorable looking up into the sovereign's eyes.
"Greetings, Tobias, right now I am sorting through the daily cost of living and preparing lessons for your sister."
"Oh. Um . . . Bellona . . . can I ask you something?"
"The proper question would be 'May I ask you something.' Using can is requesting ability, using may is requesting permission."
"'Kay. May I ask you something?"
"Yes, you may ask me something."
"Bellona, are we going back to Andamada, and do you think Cari loves us?"
Of all the questions to ask . . . how will she answer
?
"Tobias, we will eventually be going back to Andromeda, yes, and I know without a doubt that Carissa loves you. Both you and Tristan give Carissa the courage to keep trying to learn to grow and to love."
"Okay, it's just that . . . well . . . I like it here, and I don't wanna go away like Cari says to. I think you're my momma and Mona my auntie, she's really funny sometimes. Can we have pizza tonight?"
"Tobias, what did I say about how to properly ask a question?"
"Sorry, may we have pizza tonight? I'll call, and Mona said she would give me the money. So could we, please?"
Queen Clarissant could not help but laugh, and glancing at the sovereign, neither could she. "Yes, we will have pizza tonight." The sovereign replies with a bit of a laugh, and with that, Tobie hopped and skipped out of Bellona's study.
Carissa then walks into the study with Tristan not far behind. He sees the historian sitting on the sofa scribing the scrolls. No one can resist his smile, so she makes room for him to sit beside her. They are both surprised at the events that occur next.
"Bell, Tristan told me he asked you if he could stay the night. You said no, why is that?"
"Carissa . . . is that what Tristan told you, or is that your interpretation of what Tristan told you?"
"What difference does it make? Why did you say no?"
"The difference is that if Tristan told had you the entire story, you would not be asking that question, Carissa."
"All right. . . He told me he asked you if he could stay the night at his friend's house. You said no because you don't trust them. He told you he's stayed there tons of times, and as you can see, he is still in one piece. So what's the problem?"
"Tristan, I need to speak with your sister alone, please. After the matter has been solved, I will notify you of the events. It may be awhile, however."
"O . . . kay . . . I guess I'm just going to practice . . . um . . . dancing. That's it. I'll just go practice the dances." Tristan leaves the room, closing the draperies behind him. The sovereign stands straight up from behind her desk. It is the stance of authority, as has been witnessed time and again.
"Carissa, I will tell you this as many times as it takes for you to realize and remember this statement." Bellona waits for Carissa to look at her. During this time, Carissa has been looking at that mysterious spot on the floor. Finally, after what seems an eternity, "I am the head of the household. No one has the right to challenge
my authority,
my decision,
my declarations. Tristan came to me with a request. As simple as the request that it was, that request was denied. You may have confidence in this family. I do not, however. Tristan is a part of this household, therefore, it is my duty to be sure that
his safety,
his health,
his well-being is intact. Am I making myself perfectly clear?"
"Whatever, bitch. He's just a kid. Kids are allowed to have fun, or isn't that allowed, Miss Motherfucker High and Mighty."
"I will ignore what you have just said, and having fun is allowed. However, it is allowed within reason."
"What . . ."
"The matter is closed."
"We'll see about that."
"Are you going to steal the wine again or are you going to work this matter out in a more constructive manner?" Carissa suddenly stops as she is about to exit the room. The sovereign is just full of surprises.
"How did you . . . "
"There is very little I do not know."
"It didn't taste any different than the rat's piss I usually drink."
"Fine wine is meant to be savored, not guzzled in an effort to forget the night. We really must work on your language skills, Carissa."
"Is there any way . . ."
"No."
"What am I supposed to tell him, then?"
"I will explain things to Tristan."
"All right, but don't come cryin' to me if he won't accept the answer."
Carissa clenches her fists as her skin turns to a deep red color, and as she exits the room, her arm swings out to knock over a lamp, the sovereign's favorite lamp, of all things, and a cold breeze blows in as she leaves the room. Why would she be so angry? Would the sovereign have the answer?
"Sovereign Bellona . . . would you like me to clear this debris?" the queen asks, having witnessed the events as well. Bellona does not reply right away, so maybe the queen did not approach the subject correctly. Perhaps another way will work.
"My Sovereign, Sovereign Bellona, as Carissa exited the room, the lamp was knocked over, shattering into tiny bits and pieces. Would you like me to clear it for you? I would be more than happy to assist you, my sovereign."
"There is no reason for such formality, Clarissant. I will wait for Carissa to come to her senses before I have her clear away the debris. It has been three weeks since she tried to leave the house that night. Neither of us has discussed the subject since it occurred. I wish to return to Andromeda. There, I believe, Carissa will do better physically, emotionally, and mentally, as it is a pure environment. I think, though, it would be too soon. Gather your cloak and come for a stroll with me. Perhaps a little bit of time will help to clear the negativity. Would you tell Tristan I will speak with him when we return? I cannot speak with him at this moment without saying words that might cause him harm."
"I understand, my sovereign, and I will do as you wish. He is an intelligent lad, I am sure he will understand."
The queen left the study to speak with Tristan. He had overheard the argument, and understood the reasoning, as the queen knew he would. After her talk with Tristan, Clarissant returned to the study, then she and Bellona left the manor, walking side by side in silence for a little while.
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I pray for both Tristan and Carissa. I pray to the deity for Carissa to understand and leave behind the anger. Perhaps it is the lack of understanding of authority, since she has never had an authority figure until now. Maybe that is the problem. It truly is unfortunate that Tristan was caught up in all of this mess. I predict, though, that my wife has a solution. We shall see what the outcome will be.
I correctly predicted that my wife knew who stole the wine. I know my wife well. The things she knows, the things she is capable of, are astonishing.
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They return to the manor not long after they leave for their walk. Bellona is still deep in thought, anyone would guess, judging by her eyes. She enters the sleeping chamber, smiling when she sees Tristan sitting on his bed playing with his machine. She sits down beside him, gently taking away his machine, and holds him close as she rocks him back and forth. He is temporarily puzzled, but cannot resist the love being offered.
"Tristan, my decision still stands. I fear something happening to you, and this family, not knowing how to take care of the situation, causes me to be fearful. I am the head of the household, you see, and my responsibility is not only to take into consideration the welfare of my people, but to also see to it that my family stays intact, perhaps another time, Tristan. Do you think they would accept an invitation to a meal with us? It would offer me an opportunity to meet with them so I have a better understanding of these people you call friends."
"All right, and thanks, Miss Bellona, for at least trying to talk to Cari, I know that she can be . . . well . . . um . . . hard to take sometimes. But thank you for at least trying to talk to her. You have to know, I told her exactly what we talked about. She messed it all up and told you a bunch of boloney. Poor Tobie ran into Desdemona's room. I don't know what they're doing, though. I haven't gone over there and checked it out. I can call and ask Tom if he and his family can come? See what happens?"
"Call him from my study, and I am sure Desdemona is taking care of Tobie. It is not too late yet, there is still time."
They walk into the study together. Tristan calls his friend to invite their family over for a meal, and it is decided that tomorrow they will share an afternoon meal together. Tristan is happy to hear the news, and does not mind the assignment of creating a suitable menu for the get-together. He runs straight up to the sleeping chambers, declaring, "I'll have it done in a minute." This causes the sovereign to laugh. The happiness is short lived, though, when Carissa comes back into the study.
"What the HELL did you tell Tristan? Did you tell him a lie, Miss High and Mighty?"
"Carissa, I will answer your questions when you are able to approach me in a more dignified manner. Keep in mind also, Carissa, the guards will be watching. As soon as you leave the grounds, I will be notified. And if that happens . . . you remember the consequences. This would be the time to find a more suitable means of releasing your anger than drinking. Goodnight, Carissa."
"Look, you royal pain in the ass, if I want to leave to go get drunk, I can leave and go get drunk. You can't stop me, you cunt suckin' bitch."
"I am not stopping nor am I preventing you from getting drunk. I am merely reminding you of the consequences. In the end, Carissa, it is your decision.
3Remember, when life's path is steep, to keep your mind even."
"What the fuck is that supposed to mean? You talk fancy schmancy and expect me to know something? Get real."
"Take heed of my warning, Carissa. There will be no second chances."
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This day did not end well at all. Tomorrow will come, and with that will be the beginning of a brand new day. The sun will rise with flora and fauna rising with the morning sun. The sovereign has left for the bathing chambers to relax a bit. The queen did try to follow. However, the sovereign wishes to be alone. The queen prays to release the negative feelings and frustrations that she has been feeling as a result of the situation with Carissa.
4May There Be Peace Within
May you trust your highest power that you are exactly where you are meant to be
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you
May you be content knowing you are a child of God
Let this presence settle into our bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of you...
Amen
It is remarkable what comes to mind during trying times. I did not realize I had remembered that prayer. It has been awhile since I have said or read any prayers, though it is my own fault. I have grown lazy in the teachings of my beliefs as I grew older, and the lessons became more difficult. It is not easy becoming queen. There is so much to learn in so little time.
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Carissa does not leave the grounds, no, however, it is later discovered that she requested one of the guards to buy her something to help her feel good, whisky is the believed substance. The sovereign is very angry when she confronts the guard who aided Carissa in getting drunk. As punishment, the guard will be stationed in an area with little or no action, as not only a lesson in patience, but also a lesson in with every action there is a possible consequence, this time the consequence is doing something that is very hard for any warrior to do, sit and wait. Carissa does have a right to get drunk though, the sovereign states, but no one has the right to aid her consors in getting drunk.
It is early morning, and my queen is spending time with the boys. She has grown attached to them, as I knew she would. What am I going to do about Carissa? I feel as if I am searching for answers that do not exist. What was it that Alarica said, 'To be long on patience, understanding, and love, because those are the key elements in building a true relationship with anyone'? A short time ago, Carissa attempted to leave during the night. I confronted her with my thoughts, and she did not deny them, only confirmed them. Has life been so cruel that playing the role of a man's toy, a plaything, an object of desire, is the only thing that pleases her?
Maybe it is time to begin preparations to leave America and go back home to Andromeda. This fighting must stop, it must end. I know there is a little girl in there that wants to be loved, needs to be loved, but where is she? Is she so lost under all of that pain and anger that she cannot find her way out? It is time to stop fighting and time to start loving the child within. Day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, I do as Alarica said. Just love, unconditionally and freely. Maybe then, her need to be drunk will lessen. I do love her so and wish her the best that life has to offer. It is my solemn vow, to the holy deity above, that I will love, honor, and cherish Carissa until time is no longer. Amen.
Continued...