Sex: Yup.

Violence: That too.

Angst: Probably.

This story is going to be slightly long, but I promise it´ll be updated frequently. (There´s nothing worse than having to wait, is there?) Okay, since all that´s been taken care of, I´ll just shut up and let the tale begin. Comments are welcome at: dayze11@hotmail.com

Copyright © 1999 by Day

Part 5

Chapter Nineteen

 Neo Roma, city of beauty, city of decadence. Capital of the Realm and home of the Council and the President. Admired, or despised, depending on one´s political point of view, throughout the world for its efficient and cost-cutting way of keeping the dissident in check and the unwanted and the outcast under control.

Craning her neck to look up at the towering skyscrapers, Mickey´s mouth was an expression of silent awe as she walked through the streets, past breathtaking plazas and monuments, fountains and buildings. She stared in wonder at the expensive and beautifully decorated shops displaying objects she didn´t even know existed, and the even more beautiful inhabitants of the city, all immaculately dressed, rushing to and fro destinations known only to themselves.

She knew of course that the flawless and gorgeous people walking by her on the pavement or driving past in their shiny environmental friendly cars were the direct result of the fierce breeding control instigated by the Council to make sure that only healthy and aesthetically pleasing humans´ genes were allowed to produce offspring, and in spite of everything in her protested against this outrage, she couldn´t help but feel more than a little intimidated and overwhelmed by all the splendour around her.

She was on her way to Lingstrom Memorial Park where she was to meet Lennon Lawrence, the doctor whose clinic she´d volunteered to work in for the next two years, much to her teachers´ consternation who would have preferred she stayed somewhere closer where she would have been to the Organisation´s disposal, tending to the wounded from the countless skirmishes with the Council´s troops.

They had only agreed to let her go when Doctor Lawrence, out of sheer desperation since he desperately needed capable help, had promised that the Organisation´s agents in Neo Roma could also be treated in his clinic, something he until then had refused to do out of fear that the authorities would find out and imprison himself and his wife thus closing down his clinic which was the only one of its kind in the Slums. An area which was home to thousands of people. The clinic had two examination rooms, one of them also used as a makeshift OR when needed, and a staff consisting of Lawrence, his wife Sophia and now, Mickey.

Doctor Lawrence was a pioneer, a man who helped people out of the goodness of his heart and not out of one political conviction or another which was why Mickey had been interested to come to work with him in the first place. His clinic survived mainly on anonymous donations coming from people living in the suburbs of Neo Roma, the people who were too poor to belong to the elite, but too rich to belong to the poor, and who lived close enough to the Slums to be able to smell the foul stench when the wind was right, or hear the sirens and the gunfire when the Council conducted its occasional clean ups.

The doctor and his wife lived in the Suburbs in a three room apartment, it was too dangerous for them to live in the Slums, and they had arranged for Mickey to have a small room of her own in an apartment building located slightly closer to the Slums, something they had apologized for many times, but it was the only place they could afford and Mickey had told them not to worry. She knew how to defend herself and at least she wouldn’t have to get up as early as them to get to work. In truth she was a bit worried about living so close to such a notorious neighbourhood, having heard all the stories of gangs ruthlessly protecting their area of control, psychos conducting manhunts for fun or profit and just in general being full of unpleasant people with no regard for human life, but the idea of having a place of her own for the first time in her life, almost eliminated her concerns and she could hardly wait to begin putting her own personal touch on her new home.

The Suburbs and the Slums were separated by a solid concrete wall and even the Suburbs were cut off from the inner city by an artificial river with only one bridge, both of which were heavily guarded and both had been created fifteen years ago when the riots had been at their highest and the citizens of Neo Roma had been afraid the riots would spread to their part of the city.

***************

"I open up the clinic every day a seven and close it again at six. I´d like to keep it open longer, but the guards don´t let anybody past the wall after 7 pm and you don´t want to be trapped in the Slums after dark, so remember that, miss Renault," the elderly man looked at her meaningfully, "under no circumstances should you stay in the clinic till after 6:15, that´ll barely give you enough time to reach the wall before seven."

"I understand, Dr. Lawrence," Mickey replied seriously as the two of them walked side by side on the pavement, "but what if you´re about to leave and then suddenly a patient comes in who desperately needs medical care. What do you do then?"

The doctor stopped and turned to look at her, a sad and resigned expression on his wrinkled face, "Then, miss Renault, then you say you´re sorry and tell them to come back in the morning and then you leave."

"Just like that?" Mickey asked in surprise, searching the doctor´s pale brown eyes for any hint of insincerity.

"Just like that, miss," Lawrence repeated. "And then you go home and try not to think about what happened when they don´t show up the next morning."

They continued to walk down the street for a couple of minutes without speaking, then Mickey inquired softly, "Isn´t it hard, difficult, to turn down a patient who needs you?"

"Very," the doctor replied quietly, "but I have no choice." He glanced at her, "I can´t say it gets any easier, but you´ll get used to it and most people in the Slums know they have to seek treatment before six, so it doesn´t happen that often."

"But it does happen?"

"Yes."

Mickey nodded to herself, inwardly hoping she would never have to turn anybody down, but knowing that it was bound to happen sooner or later. She just hoped it would be later, rather than sooner.

They had crossed the bridge leading from the city to the Suburbs an hour ago, and Mickey had been pleasantly surprised, and not a little relieved, to find that the papers the Organisation had supplied her with had gotten her past the checkpoints without any problems, her new identity as a distant relative of Dr. Lawrence recently moved to Neo Roma accepted and noted without a second glance.

The Suburbs were less grand and less intimidating than the city and Mickey already felt more at home there with its not so extravagant shops and buildings, streets not so immaculate clean and the occasional tree that actually had flaws and wasn´t perfectly symmetrical and straight like the trees in Lingstrom Memorial Park. Even the inhabitants seemed more human, some of them actually looking both tired and bad tempered after a long day at work and their clothes also had the appearance of having been worn more that once which made Mickey feel less out of place in her faded jeans and her old, but comfortable dark suede jacket.

She suspected that both she and Doctor Lawrence had made quite the pair walking through the park, her looking at everything with awe mixed with a healthy dose of disgust, and the doctor wearing an old suit two sizes too big and whose tousled and messy grey hair and sharp nose made him look very much like a ruffled hawk. However, in spite of the elderly man´s eccentric appearance, Mickey had taken a liking to him right away. Charmed by his sincere and heartfelt smile and his honest and friendly eyes.

"So… Here it is, miss Renault. Your new home."

"Please call me Mickey, Dr. Lawrence," Mickey hurried to say after she realized she´d missed what the doctor had said the first time. "I still haven´t gotten accustomed to my last name and I keep looking around for this miss Renault every time you say it."

The doctor smiled, "No problem… Mickey. I wouldn´t want you to think I was speaking to somebody else." He glanced at his watch then put his hand into his pocket and pulled out a key. "You room is on the eleventh floor. Sophia and I brought by a few basic necessities yesterday, a bed, a table and a chair, stuff like that, but otherwise you´ll find the room pretty bare so if there´s anything else you need, I´m afraid you´ll have to get it yourself." He gave her a slightly embarrassed smile, "Sophia and I put all our money into the clinic so we can´t really afford anything else."

"Hey," Mickey smiled reassuringly, "you´re talking to a girl who´s spent most of her life in a barrack. I´m used to bare necessities and as long as I´ve got a roof over my head that´s all I´ll need."

She was rewarded with a grateful smile and the doctor handed her the key. "I´m glad to hear that, Mickey. Okay, I´ll have to go now. I´ll come by tomorrow at 5 am and we´ll walk to the clinic together, that way I can show you how to get there and the faster people in the Slums learn that you belong to me the better, and a pretty girl like you really shouldn´t be on her own in the Slums, no matter what time of the day it is."

He paused slightly then looked at her seriously, "Since you belong to the Organisation, I have to ask you this, are you armed?"

Mickey shook her head, "No, it´s too dangerous for people like me to smuggle guns into Neo Roma, that´s left to the professionals, and I don´t really like them that much anyway. Besides, I´m skilled in various techniques of self-defence and if that doesn´t work I´ll just run."

"That sounds like a plan," Lawrence said, relief evident on his face. "Personally, I don´t like guns either and I try not to tempt fate by bringing one with me to work."

"Are you allowed to bring weapons into the Slums," Mickey asked, rather surprised by that information.

"Yes, if you got the right permissions, know the right people and got the right address of course. They keep track of all guns going past that wall and no one is allowed to leave the Slums again if they can´t produce the weapon they arrived with. Gun control in the Slums is one of the Council´s most urgent issues. Okay, gotta go. See you tomorrow morning."

Mickey nodded and then spent a few minutes watching the doctor walk away before she turned around and walked into the building that was to be her home for the next two years.

***************

The next couple of months passed in a blur and later when Mickey tried to recall those early days, the only thing she could come up with was vague images of her going to and fro work, treating patients and collapsing down onto her bed at night, barely having the energy to undress.

She soon realized that working in the clinic was hard, ungrateful and sometimes dangerous, but occasionally a patient would show up with a small gift or a kind word after being treated by her, and those rare occurrences of gratitude helped Mickey through the long hours at night when she couldn´t sleep and was doubting she´d made the right decision coming to Neo Roma.

It was also a frustrating task she had taken upon her. Already she´d had to turn down five people, two of which had been so badly beaten that she doubted they would survive the night, and if it hadn´t been for Doctor Lawrence telling her no and rushing her along, she would have stayed until after the allowed time limit to treat them. Whether they had survived the night she didn´t know, they hadn´t showed up again the next morning and she´d just barely stopped herself from going out looking for them, knowing only too well how futile and ultimately dangerous it would be.

The people in the Slums came to them with all sorts of injuries and illnesses, and Mickey doubted she could´ve gotten that much experience anywhere else so quickly. After two weeks she´d treated both pellagra and other kinds of malnutrition, stab wounds, gun shots, burns and even assisted Dr. Lawrence in an impromptu appendix operation, barely making it before it ruptured.

The cases that drained Mickey´s resources the most were the Reuma patients who showed up, all of them in horrendous pain begging for morphine, their eyes desperate and pleading. Seeing those terminally ill people, children and adults alike, and knowing that there was nothing she could do for them, and that they´d have to save the morphine for operations and people who had a chance of surviving was taking its toll on Mickey, and on more than one occasion she´d woken up in the night, sweating profoundly with images of dying people playing before her eyes.

Occasionally they would treat one of the Organisation´s agents working undercover in Neo Roma, silent and cautious people who showed up, had their injuries bandaged or a bullet removed before they disappeared back out into the streets, often never saying a word.

When treating an agent, Mickey´s thoughts would always stray to another subject no matter how much she tried to stop herself. A black-haired, blue eyed subject whom she knew from Dane was working undercover in Neo Roma as well.

She had been very surprised and very grateful that she and Dane had managed to remain friends after what had happened. He had been very hurt, she knew that, and one night she´d asked him how come he was still talking to her, why he didn´t hate her. He´d just given her a tired smile and asked whether she hated Jo for leaving her. Mickey had been silent for a moment, but had then replied that although some part of her really wanted to hate Jo, she just couldn´t. Dane had asked her why and she had said simply, "Because I love her." Pain had showed briefly in Dane´s eyes and then he´d nodded, "There you go, that´s why I can´t hate you either, Mickey. It´s that simple really."

What exactly Jo´s assignment in Neo Roma was she had no idea and since she basically tried not to think too much about Jo, she hadn´t attempted to find out and she doubted somebody could have, or would have, told her even if she had asked. She knew from Dane that Basil and Jo were still in touch, but that Basil frequently complained that Jo´s letters were sporadic and brief at best, leaving more questions unanswered than answered or simply ignoring the newly appointed corporal´s inquiries altogether.

Whether Dane and Jo had any contact at all, Mickey didn´t know and she hadn´t had the guts to ask, not wanting to know that she, and what had happened back in Vega 3, had destroyed their friendship.

The rational part of her mind knew that Jo was just as much to blame as she and as she´d told Dane those many months ago, she´d really wanted to hate her and sometimes she almost succeeded for a brief period of time, but often, late nights, when she was too exhausted to sleep, she would find herself recalling Jo´s touch on her skin, her lips on hers and fantasizing how it would be to feel that again. The next day she promised herself she wouldn´t do it again, that she would move on and not spare Jo a second thought, perhaps even begin dating, but inevitably she would find herself thinking about the dark lieutenant again. Remembering the good times they´d had just before Messina had arrived to take Jo away and everything had changed.

"Mickey! I need a hand here!"

Mickey´s musings were effectively interrupted by Doctor Lawrence´s voice calling for help and a woman´s desperate cries.

"Get it out! Get it out! You´re poisoning me! I know you are! Get it out!"

Mickey rushed past the few people waiting patiently in the small corridor separating the examination room she occupied from Doctor Lawrence´s, and rushed to the doctor who was struggling to keep a hysteric woman from pulling out the IV inserted into her left arm. Mickey grabbed onto the panicked woman´s arms to prevent her from hurting herself, and said as calmly as possible, "It´s okay, Dana, it´s okay! Nobody´s trying to hurt you. Please take it easy, Dr. Lawrence´s only trying to help you. Calm down, Dana, everything´s going to be fine, I promise."

Mickey´s voice finally managed to soothe the terrified woman enough that she stopped fighting and the doctor could let go of the woman and reinsert the IV into her vein. Taking a deep breath he turned to his assistant, giving her a tired but grateful smile, "Thank you, Mickey. That was well done."

Mickey smiled briefly in return, ignoring the pain in her chest where Dana had struck her in her attempt to get away. "She was just afraid, Doctor. Dana´s parents died when the water was contaminated." She looked at the silent woman who was slumped down on the chair beside them. "She´s been a bit paranoid since then," she sighed quietly and looked at her watch, "not that one can blame her."

The doctor was about to respond, but was interrupted by angry voices outside in the corridor."

"Hey! You can´t cut in like that, arsehole! It´s not your fucking turn yet! I´ve been waiting for two hours to see the doctor!"

"Get outta my way!" A voice shouted, hinting of barely controlled anger and Mickey froze, a wave of painfully conflicting emotions crashing over her. Her entire body taut as a spring, she turned around to face the doorway and looked directly into wild blue eyes which widened in shock for a second, but then became cold and emotionless, leaving her face to rest on Dr. Lawrence´s.

"Doc, I need your help here! My partner´s been shot!"

The doctor was already moving towards the heavily bleeding man whom Jo was half holding, half carrying and he called out to his paralyzed assistant, "Mickey, prepare the other room for surgery and send the remaining patients home, I won´t have time to treat more today!"

Mickey shook her head and quickly gathered herself, "Yes, Doctor!"

Only minutes later the clinic had been emptied, the room had been prepared and the agent was being sedated. The doctor´s wife, Sophia, had come running from the tiny room connected to the examination room where they kept their small supply of medicine and sterile instruments to assist her husband with the surgery.

"Do you need me for anything, Doctor?" Mickey asked hopefully, although she knew the answer already.

"No, Sophia, and I got it covered for now. You go and take care of the other one, she was hurt, too, if I remember correctly. I´ll call you if I need you."

"Yes, Doctor," Mickey answered and left the room, closing the door quietly behind her. For a moment she just stared at the halfway open door leading in to the other examination room, then subconsciously she took a deep breath and went inside.

***************

Chapter Twenty

Jo was pacing the small room, practically radiating pent up tension and anxiety and the moment she heard Mickey enter the room and close the door, she spun around and stared directly into the blonde´s eyes.

For a moment they just looked at each other in silence then Mickey spoke softly, soothingly, "Sit down and I´ll have a look at your arm."

Jo blinked and stared at her uncomprehendingly then slowly, as if noticing for the first time, her gaze fell on her left arm where the white shirt sleeve was soaked with blood. Without a word she took a step back and sat down on the examination table, her alert, cautious eyes never leaving Mickey as the young doctor brought a small tray with instruments over to the table and then walked back to a sink to wash her hands and slip on a pair of gloves.

Mickey had no problems feeling Jo´s eyes in her back and she had to make a conscious effort to calm herself down before she could turn around and face the lieutenant, giving her a pleasant and fully professional smile.

"Please take off your shirt so I can look at the wound."

A few seconds passed before Jo responded, but then slowly she unbuttoned the white cotton shirt to reveal a just as white t-shirt underneath, and as Mickey returned to the table, she couldn´t help but notice how stark the contrast between the white t-shirt and Jo´s tanned skin was. Before she began to examine the long and deep gash, starting at Jo´s wrist and ending just below her elbow, she gave the silent lieutenant a quick look over, searching for more serious and urgent injuries, all the while acutely aware of Jo´s gaze on her.

"Are you hurt anywhere else?"

Jo´s eyes left her face to briefly glance down at her own body, lingering for a second on the dark trousers and leather shoes then she shook her head, "No. Most of it is Frederic´s blood, not mine."

Mickey nodded to herself then reached out slowly, somehow feeling she should be careful not to startle Jo, and began to wash away the blood from the lieutenant´s arm. Jo studied the blonde´s competent and gentle ministrations to her arm in silence, her gaze occasionally leaving the wound to rest on Mickey´s face before trailing back to her injured arm.

Every time Jo´s eyes fell on her, Mickey felt it as an almost physical touch and often she had to stop herself from looking up from her task and meet the restless blue eyes she knew she´d find there.

The wound was deep, but it had been a relatively clean cut and would only leave a faint scar when it was healed.

Another one for your collection, Jo, Mickey thought absently as she reached for the small syringe lying on the tray, but before she could pick it up, a warm and calloused hand closed over hers, halting her movement.

"Save it."

"Sorry?" Mickey looked up into veiled, but slightly calmer blue eyes.

"I don´t need it. Save it for someone who does."

Mickey looked sceptically at the wound then back at Jo, subconsciously biting her lower lip. A small act of indecision that was a trademark of hers without her even knowing it. "It´ll hurt."

Jo shrugged, "Not more than it does already." She removed her hand and returned her attention to the wound, clearly indicating that she considered the discussion for closed and Mickey couldn´t help but smile, hoping Jo wouldn´t notice.

Apparently, being close to the centre of power for years and, if the rumours were true, doing slightly more than just work for Iris Messina, had made Jo used to get her way, obviously just as much in the habit of giving orders as well as receiving them. Pushing the thought away Mickey sighed inaudibly, the smile leaving her face and she put the syringe back on the tray.

"Okay, suit yourself. It´ll need about fifteen to twenty stitches."

Jo acknowledged her words with a small nod, but her attention was no longer on her arm or Mickey, but on the door leading out to the corridor separating the two rooms. Quickly and efficiently Mickey began to stitch up the wound and after the initial flinch as the needle first penetrated tender flesh, Jo neither moved nor spoke, her eyes still centred on the door, a distant and pensive expression on her face.

Several stitches later she cleared her throat softly, "Is he going to be all right?"

"Your partner?" Mickey glanced up briefly from her work then resumed her meticulous task. "I don´t know. I couldn´t tell how badly he was hurt when you brought him in."

"Could you go find out?" The hint of command in Jo´s voice caused Mickey to abruptly look up and meet the lieutenant´s eyes, her own narrowing slightly. Noticing the blonde´s expression Jo frowned a little and the frown deepened as she didn´t receive an answer, but then understanding slowly began to show on her face and she licked her lips a few times before speaking softly, "Please?"

This time every trace of command and authority was gone and Mickey held Jo´s gaze for a moment then she nodded, "As soon as I´ve stitched you up, I´ll go ask Dr. Lawrence, okay?"

"Yes. Thank you."

With no further words spoken Mickey finished her task and then quickly bandaged the wound before she left Jo to inquire about the condition of her partner. For the longest of time she didn´t come back and the lieutenant was already about to begin pacing the room again when a pale Mickey returned, sporting a small Band-Aid on her arm.

"I had to donate some blood," she explained tiredly, answering Jo´s unspoken question. She began to roll down the sleeve of her white coat, "They were running out."

"Oh, okay…"

Jo watched in silence as Mickey began to clean up the instruments on the tray and then put everything into a small cabinet next to the sink.

"They think he´s gonna pull through." She took off her coat and carelessly tossed it onto a table. "If he makes it through the night he´ll be fine."

Jo watched with something close to avid fascination as Mickey stretched and began to roll her head back and forth to loosen up painfully tense muscles. "He´ll have to stay here, though." She held up a hand to stop the protests she knew were coming, "He can´t be moved, Jo, you know that. It´ll kill him. He shouldn´t even be moved tomorrow, but we all know how eager you are to get out of here so Doctor Lawrence has agreed to let him stay in the clinic for the night and then you can come and pick him up in the morning."

"Then I´ll stay, too."

Mickey sighed and turned to look at Jo who´d eased herself down from the examination table and was looking at her impassively. "No you won´t. I´ve already had this argument with Dr. Lawrence. I´m the only one staying. It´s too dangerous to be in the Slums at night, the clinic has been attacked before and the fewer who are here, the better."

An all too familiar expression of stubbornness and determination showed on Jo´s face and Mickey barely managed to steel her heart against it as she was vividly reminded of the young cadet sitting restlessly on her bed, forced to work on her academic skills and hating every minute of it.

Jo took a step forward, "I know how to take care of myself, Mickey. I know how to survive in the Slums. I´m staying."

The lieutenant had spoken quietly and calmly, but her tone of voice had been practically oozing command and everything in Mickey rebelled against it. Taking a deep breath she looked into Jo´s eyes, "I know you´re capable of taking care of yourself and I know you´re familiar with the Slums in a way I´m not, and hopefully never will be, but I´m serious here, Jo. Dr. Lawrence and Sophia will be leaving as soon as your partner´s condition is stable and you will be leaving with them."

Jo cocked her head slightly, her eyes cold and angry, but then something resembling a grin suddenly flickered across her face and she crossed her arms. "Make me."

For minutes they just stared at each other then Mickey shook her head in exasperation and unable to contain a small grin of her own said, "You haven´t changed one bit, Jo. You´re still one of the most stubborn and pigheaded persons I´ve ever met."

Before the lieutenant had time to reply, Mickey turned her head and glanced towards the corridor where she´d picked up the sounds of the doctor and his wife exiting the other examination room, then she sighed and spoke wearily, "Okay, if you want to stay, stay. However, you´ll have to promise to do as I say, all the time, no matter what. No ignoring my instructions or question my decisions. The clinic is my home ground and what I say goes, is that clear?"

Her eyes held a subtle, but firm warning as she looked back at Jo who nodded slowly.

"Fair enough, I can live with that."

Mickey regarded her for a second, "You better." Then she turned and stepped out into the corridor to hear if the doctor had any instructions for her before he left.

***************

Checking the unconscious man´s pulse one more time Mickey then exited the room, making sure to leave the door open in case he should wake up and need anything.

"I´m afraid I can´t offer you anything to eat," she said as she returned to the other room where Jo was sitting on the examination table, her legs dangling over the edge swinging back and forth. "I ate my lunch hours ago and since I didn´t think I´d have to spend the night here I didn´t bring anything else."

"S´okay," Jo answered evenly, her eyes roaming the small and dimly lit room she´d have to stay in for the next many hours. After less than an hour she was already feeling edgy and trapped which didn´t promise well for the hours to come. "I´m not hungry." She grabbed her shirt and jumped off the table, walking past Mickey over to the sink. "Might as well let it soak a little," she spoke over her shoulder to the young doctor who nodded and then sat down on a chair, sighing quietly.

"Yeah, a less bloody look might make it easier for you to get past the guards tomorrow." Her brow suddenly furrowed and she straightened up, regarding the strong back before her, "How are you going to get past the guards? I mean, with your partner barely capable of standing upright, much less walking, don´t you think they´ll ask some questions?"

Jo turned off the water then turned around to face her, an indifferent, slightly bored expression on her face, "Nah, it won´t be a problem. I´ve got it all taken care of." She wiped her hands on her trousers, ignoring the damp towel hanging beside the sink then walked back to the table where she sat down, halfway facing Mickey, halfway the door.

For a few minutes an awkward silence lingered between them, neither meeting the other´s eyes and soon Jo wasn´t able to take it anymore. "A car will come to pick him up," she said, offering a bit of information to Mickey she knew she wasn´t allowed to. "Cars never have any trouble getting past the checkpoints."

"A car?" The blonde looked up and met her eyes. "In the Slums?"

Jo shrugged, "It does happen occasionally. The guards will think we´re just some rich kids looking for adventure and then found more than we were ready to handle." She shrugged again, "It happens."

Mickey looked back at the floor, exhaustion and tiredness settling heavily in her body and all she wanted was to lie down and sleep. "I know. I had a patient just the other day who was a victim of some bastards looking for… for adventure. They chased him down the street in their car until he collapsed and then they ran him over… It was pure luck they didn´t kill him."

A strangled sound reached her ears and Mickey gazed up to see Jo´s hands tightly clutching the edges of the table, her knuckles white from the force of the grip. The lieutenant´s face was unnaturally pale and she could see Jo´s jaw clenching with barely controlled fury.

"Jo?" The dark head turned slowly towards her and Mickey felt a shiver run down her back when she saw the expression in the blue eyes. "Jo, he´s all right now. Aside from a few bruises and sore ribs he wasn´t seriously injured."

"Not thanks to them," Jo spoke through gritted teeth, her expression so angry and her body so tense that Mickey felt a small tingle of fear although she knew the lieutenant´s anger wasn´t directed at her. As if sensing the blonde´s trepidation Jo took a deep breath, forcing herself to calm down and then managed to give Mickey a small apologetic smile, her hands gradually letting go of the table, "I´m sorry… I… I didn´t mean to…" She closed her eyes briefly, taking another deep breath before looking back at the blonde, "It´s… it´s just… I… I get so angry when… when I hear… stuff… like that."

"It´s okay," Mickey gave her a brief smile in return. "I get angry, too. We all do here, but there isn´t anything we can do about it except treating their injuries and hope they´ll have time to take cover the next time a group of rich kids get bored and decide to visit the Slums for some entertainment."

Jo nodded, more to herself than to Mickey, "Yeah, but sometimes they get more than they bargained for." Their eyes met, but Mickey had to look away. The expression in Jo´s eyes frightened her and she didn´t particular like that sensation.

For a few heartbeats nobody spoke then Jo said softly, "Let´s talk about something else, okay?"

This time it was Mickey´s time to nod, "Yes, let´s." She tapped her fingers nervously on her thigh a few times then smiled sheepishly, "What do you want to talk about?"

The lieutenant scratched her chin, a tiny grin playing on her lips, "You asking me? Well, I don´t know…" She let the words linger in the air between them, her gaze straying to the neat bandage on her arm. "You did a fine job stitching my wound," she then stated. "You´re very good at that."

Surprise, joy, and then pride flickered across Mickey´s face and she said graciously, "Thanks, I do what I can."

Jo looked up briefly before staring back at her arm, "You do more than that, Mickey. You took your time, you made sure it didn´t hurt more than necessary… Trust me, not everybody does that." She reached out and tentatively ran a finger along the white bandage, speaking so quietly Mickey almost didn´t hear it, "You got very soft hands."

Mickey licked her lips, too stunned to offer an reply, her heart fighting with her mind as how to interpret Jo´s remark.

"Thank you," she finally managed to get out.

Jo didn´t meet her eyes, "You´re welcome."

***************

"So what happened?"

Jo raised her head a little so she could look at Mickey who was sitting on the floor resting her back against the wall. "What? What do you mean?"

Mickey raised her eyebrows and gave Jo a look, "What do you think I mean? Your partner of course. What happened to get him shot?"

"Oh that." Jo slumped back down on the table, crossing her legs at the ankles. "He disregarded my orders, thought he could do it the easy way." The lieutenant snorted in disgust then rolled onto her side to get a better look of the blonde, "But at least he won´t do it again." She grinned lightly, "I´m pretty sure he´s learned his lesson."

"Jo!" Mickey gasped in horror. "You didn´t shot him, did you?"

"What?" Jo stared at her. "Of course not! What do you take me for?"

"Oh… sorry," Mickey felt herself blush, but somehow managed to hold the lieutenant´s gaze. "I… I just thought… when you said that…"

"He got himself shot because he was being stupid. It´s as simple as that," Jo sat up, pulling her legs up and wrapping her arms around them. "And no, I did not shoot him, Mickey. I only shoot them the second time they screw up."

"Haha," Mickey said dryly, then smiled. "Okay, guess I deserved that, but if you didn´t shoot him who did?"

Jo´s face grew serious and her eyes were suddenly guarded, "I can´t tell you that." She paused then continued softly, "You know why I´m here in Neo Roma, don´t you?"

The blonde nodded slowly, "Yes, well… kinda, I mean, I know you´re here undercover, but what you do exactly and why I have no idea."

"Let´s keep it like that, shall we?" Jo said gruffly, effectively dismissing any further questions, but her eyes were kind as they regarded Mickey and the blonde took no offence. Instead she rubbed her temples, stifling a yawn then met Jo´s eyes again.

"For how long have you been here? Here in the city? Unless that´s classified, too?"

"Oh no," Jo laughed. "That, actually, is public knowledge. I came here in…um… March and now it´s December which means I´ve been here for…uh… eight, nine months."

Mickey wanted to ask what Jo meant with her being in Neo Roma was `public knowledge´, but instead she stared at her hands, speaking quietly, "I´ve been here since September, almost four months."

"I know," Jo answered just as quietly.

Mickey´s head snapped up, surprise showing on her face, then green eyes narrowed just a little, "You do? Then why didn´t…" She stopped herself quickly then continued, "I mean how is that possible? I practically haven´t had any contact to the Organisation since I came here unless…" She faltered, noticing that Jo seemed uncomfortable and wasn´t looking at her. "Unless someone told you… Who told you, Jo?" Mickey´s voice wasn´t exactly angry, but it wasn´t friendly either. "Was it Basil? Dane?"

"Dane," came the low reply. "Dane told me."

Although she had expected it, the lieutenant´s answer affected her much more than she´d thought possible and she could only stare at Jo who was shifting uneasily on the table, eyes studying the floor.

"When?"

"In a letter… Some time ago."

Mickey nodded to herself, knowing she was feeling something, but not what exactly.

"So the two of you are still in touch?"

She could almost sense it and she could most definitely see it. Jo´s entire demeanour changed. She straightened up, tucked an errant lock of black hair behind her ear and as their gazes met, the piercing blue eyes were cold, expressionless, and Jo´s face was blank, in complete control.

"Why wouldn´t we be?"

As Mickey stared at the stranger who had suddenly emerged before her, she knew, without a doubt, that she was no longer looking at Jo, her erstwhile friend, but at Lieutenant Delaine, soldier in the Organisation´s army and Iris Messina´s close associate.

"Yes… why wouldn´t you be…" Mickey said, repeating Jo´s question, but leaving out the challenging edge and furious with herself for letting Jo intimidate her enough to back down from having a question answered that mattered so much to her. A question that indirectly led to another which she desperately wanted answered.

For awhile they were silent, then Jo slid down from the table, "I´ll go check on Frederic." She strode towards the door, speaking offhandedly over her shoulder, "I´ll let you know if you´re needed."

And then she was gone which was lucky for her or otherwise she´d have gotten firsthand experience how it felt to have a livid doctor trying to strangle her.

***************

Chapter Twenty-One

"So, miss Turner, how do you like it in Neo Roma so far? I trust you´ve taken the time to get a good look at our beautiful capital?"

Jo groaned inwardly all the while a dazzling smile showed on her face, "Yes, Mayor Paltoni, I most certainly have." She graciously declined the glass of champagne a bypassing waiter was offering whereas the fat, perspiring man beside her had no such reservations and took a glass from the tray, making it his fifth drink within an hour. "And I like it here very much. Neo Roma is a prime example of how to mix beauty and aesthetics with practically and simplicity. A city every citizen in the Realm should be proud of, something I´ll be sure to mention when I go back to the States."

The mayor beamed, "That´s wonderful, miss Turner. For so long the relations between the States and the Realm have been strained." He pulled out a handkerchief to wipe the sweat from his forehead, "The Council and President Anoldi have long sought to begin a dialogue between our two nations, and with more and more young people like you coming to visit, seeing for yourself our wonderful country and not listening to the propaganda of terrorists and criminals, I´m sure that it´ll only be a matter of time before the relationship between our countries is back to what it was before the Revolution. You know…" He leaned closer and Jo had to stop herself from taking a few steps back. "The Council has always regretted our countries´ estrangement and we´re all very happy that things are changing."

Jo smiled politely, making a conscious effort not to stare at the drops of sweat forming again on the mayor´s bald head, "So am I, Mayor Paltoni, and I´m not the only one. Several people back in the States are welcoming a new, more open policy towards the Realm."

The mayor smiled, "And a more profitable, too, miss Turner. Let´s not forget that."

He offered Jo his arm and together they walked through the brightly lit hall and into the parlour, Paltoni nodding and smiling at several of the beautifully and expensively dressed people who were quietly small talking around them. People all belonging to the absolute elite of Neo Roma and the Realm in general.

The small, but exclusive cocktail party was taking place at the mansion of council member Victoria Walder, a tall, skinny woman who´d recently been elected to the Council and who was now showing her gratitude.

Everybody present at the small gathering was there to eat and drink, to see and be seen and just basically do their best to show off their wealth and their importance while still seeming nonchalant and indifferent to it all and each other.

Everybody say one. One of the guests was there for a different reason, trying her damnedest to get away from her pesky and hopelessly enamoured admirer who hadn´t left her side for the last hour.

Jo was there as Josephine Turner, a wealthy heiress from the States, taking a year off before starting college, and according to the society columns in the newspapers, her grandfather had made a fortune trading with the Realm during the unsteady years of the Revolution, and had openly been opposed to the States´ harsh and uncompromising line of policy towards the Realm which had begun the moment Jefferson Lingstrom, the first president of the Realm, took office.

With the improvement of the relationship between the countries, more and more businessmen from the States crossed the Atlantic to ensure hugely profitable contracts for themselves, all looking forward to the moment when open trade between the two nations would once again be allowed. Jo´s cover was appearing to be one of those people, the main purpose of her visit to Neo Roma thus not being recreational, but about meeting potential business partners and making contacts.

Of course the newspapers didn´t mention that. That would´ve been writing about politics in a public news organ and that wasn´t allowed. So instead the journalists chose to comment on miss Turner like they did on all the other people belonging to the elite, praising her exquisite beauty and refinement, her wonderful tastes in clothes and speculating who she would be seen with at the next gala or opening night.

It had taken Jo three months to become a member of the closed and privileged society of the rich and famous, spending hours of mindless talking, attending pointless arrangements and boring banquets with even more boring guests. She´d openly displayed her wealth, used her feminine wiles and, more discretely, her brains, to get a foot in the door, and now, almost nine months after she first arrived in Neo Roma, her cover had been accepted and she moved in the finest circles, finding herself surrounded by council members, generals, diplomats, their spouses and offspring, all enjoying the fortunate and somewhat idle existence their position in society warranted.

Needless to say, Jo hated every minute of it.

***************

Slowly backing away from the mayor who was currently engaged into an animated discussion about the vintage they were being served, Jo edged herself along the wall, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. If only she could get out into the hall and then up the stairs, half of her work for tonight would be done. Of course the other half, the one being about getting into Victoria Walder´s private office and placing a bug somewhere near her desk, that was the half of the work that was the most risky and dangerous, but right now Jo couldn´t care less.

Five more minutes with the mayor and Josephine Turner, the wealthy heiress from the States, would have shocked the hell out of everyone present by throwing the man across the room.

"Oh my God, miss Turner! What has happened to you?"

Jo bit the inside of her cheek hard, very hard, and then turned around, smiling pleasantly, "Oh, it´s nothing Mrs. Walder. I had a small accident in the fencing club the other day." She looked at the discreet but nonetheless visible bandage on her left arm. "I wasn´t paying attention I´m afraid."

The tall woman shook her head, mildly disapproving, "Miss Turner, you really should take better care of yourself. What is this? The third time you´ve been cut since you started fencing?"

"I guess, I´m just clumsy," Jo smiled again, her eyes seeking out the door leading out into the hall, "but you know how the saying goes, practice makes perfect."

"Yes, I know, but-." The council member´s attention was caught by something at the other end of the room and she patted Jo on the shoulder. "Oh, excuse me, miss Turner, I must speak to General Fowler before he leaves."

"Yes, of course." Jo watched as the tall woman made her way through the crowded room, then she quickly turned and strode towards the hall. It was now or never. If she waited much longer, Mayor Paltoni was sure to search her out again and Jo knew from experience that once that happened, he wouldn´t leave her side for the rest of the night.

To her utter relief nobody approached her again and she slipped out into the quiet and empty hall, looking around quickly before heading directly towards the stairs leading to the second floor.

The second floor was quiet and only partially lit and Mrs. Walder obviously wasn´t expecting any of her guests to venture up the stairs which suited Jo just fine. Determined and soundlessly she walked down the carpeted corridor, not pausing to look at any of the huge portraits displaying various members of the powerful Walder family, or the rare Roman antiquities on display in glass cases along the wall, items which had so mysteriously disappeared from museums all over the country during the last year of the Revolution never to be seen again.

Jo had suspected something like this all along and wasn´t surprised to have her suspicions confirmed. Besides, things, and especially people, rarely surprised her anymore.

The corridor turned and Jo could vaguely make out the door at the other end. She quickly covered the distance then stopped and opened the small black purse she was carrying, a purse which of course matched perfectly to the tight black silk dress she was wearing. A dress it had taken three agents and a direct order from Messina to get Jo into, the blonde pointing out that showing up in jeans or camouflage gear wasn´t very likely to go unnoticed, and Jo had reluctantly agreed, grumbling quietly all the time it took to change much to the other agents´ amusement and, when Jo caught them grinning, trepidation as well.

As it was, the dress code Jo had to follow as part of her cover had been the hardest thing for her to adjust to, having worn nothing but uniforms and casual clothing all her life. That and the huge apartment she was renting in one of the more exclusive parts of Neo Roma, an apartment Jo found both empty and cold, serving her more as a tool than a home and thus a place she preferred to spent as much time away from as possible.

That aside she liked working undercover. Liked the relative freedom and independence it provided her with and the fact that nobody cared how she went about things and got them done, as long as she did get them done and wasn´t discovered and caught in the process.

The night before she´d left, Messina had come into her room and quietly explained to her that there might be certain things Jo´d have to do in order to get a job done, things that wouldn´t agree with her, but that as much as possible she should try to complete the task anyway, and in the case she simply couldn´t get herself to do something, she should contact her and she would see if there was any other way to go about it, and/or, if necessary, find a different agent for the assignment.

After nine months in Neo Roma there hadn´t been a single job Jo hadn´t been able to complete.

That last night on the base, they´d slept together for the first time in weeks since it had been decided Jo should go undercover in Neo Roma, and it had felt almost like the time when everything still had been simple and straightforward. The way it had been before everything changed. Before Jo changed.

A change that hadn´t gone unnoticed by the lieutenant herself, but a change she avoided to think about whenever possible, and since she in general did her best not to think about anything but her work and work related projects, it wasn´t that hard to do. And whatever haunted her dreams at night, she kept to herself, never allowing the other agents working with her a glimpse of what lay beneath the demeanour of the competent and reserved soldier whose reputation of being cold and callous had proceeded her own arrival in Neo Roma.

Jo had been surprised, but hadn´t said anything when she´d been informed that she was to lead her own unit of agents in the capital, agents who would report directly to her and receive orders from her on a daily basis. It was a command that usually befell much older and experienced soldiers, but nobody had dared to question Iris Messina´s choice, and the small whispers of favouritism had quickly disappeared and been replaced by a grudging respect when it became clear that Jo was more than capable of handling her new responsibility.

Jo herself didn´t care what people might say behind her back as long as they followed orders and completed their assignments successfully, and only once had there been a small confrontation, shortly after Jo had taken over. A disdainful general, who´d felt Jo´s leadership should rightfully have befallen him, had, surrounded by agents, made a crude and rather loud remark regarding Jo´s talents and what it was exactly that Messina found so fascinating and appealing about them.

The ensuing beating was something the soldiers talked about for weeks, but it was the look in the lieutenant´s eyes as she slammed her fists into the man´s face again and again that really had affected the people who´d been there to witness it. First it was the look of seething anger that had made them shift nervously on their feet, but it was the look of complete disinterest and cold that followed directly afterwards that had them chilled to the bone, and as Jo had wiped the blood from her face and asked whether anybody else had something to comment on, nobody had been able to meet her eyes and unsurprisingly Jo´s command or capability hadn´t been questioned since, neither to her face nor behind her back.

Jo, who reported directly to Messina, hadn´t mentioned the fight and the blonde who had learned about it through other channels hadn´t asked.

Pulling out a small metal wire from her purse, Jo quietly and skilfully began to pick the door to Victoria Walder´s office.

***************

A brisk knocking on the door startled Mickey who´d been dozing contentedly on her narrow couch and unsteadily she got to her feet, frowning lightly when she noticed the time. Although she lived in the Suburbs, visitors after 9 pm should be dealt with cautiously, especially when you were young, female and living alone. Besides, she wasn´t expecting anybody.

Keeping a bit of distance between herself and the door, Mickey called out carefully, "Who is it?"

For a few seconds there was quiet then a voice Mickey would recognize anywhere said, "It´s me. Jo."

"Jo?" Mickey stared at the door for a moment, then she stepped over and without looking through the peep-hole opened the door. The lieutenant was standing a few feet away, dressed in jeans and a leather jacket, carrying a white plastic bag in each hand. By the sound of the door opening, Jo looked up and their eyes met briefly before Jo´s gaze darted away a little, coming to rest somewhere between Mickey´s face and the doorway.

"I brought some food," she began hesitantly, holding out the bags as proof. "I went to see you at the clinic, but Doctor Lawrence said you´d left already because you weren´t feeling well, and I thought that… that maybe you hadn´t felt like shopping and… and since I was in the neighbourhood…" She trailed off, shifting uneasily on her feet then met Mickey´s eyes again. "May I come in? They´re kinda heavy."

"Oh, sure." Mickey shook her head imperceptibly to clear her mind of all the confusing thoughts that were racing through it, then stepped aside to allow Jo into her small apartment. Jo looked around for a suitable place to put the bags, but quickly realized that the room she was standing in was all there was and thus placed the bags on the small table in front of the couch.

As she turned around Mickey was standing in the doorway leading into the bathroom, a curious look on her face which was quickly replaced with a pleasant, if slightly distanced, expression. Jo let her eyes roam the small apartment, absently noting that in spite of it´s size and obvious cheap materials, Mickey had made an excellent job out of decorating and furnishing the place, making it look like it was a real home, a place where people actually lived which was a stark contrast to the silent and empty rooms in Jo´s apartment that seemed just as uninhabited as the day she moved in.

"This is nice," she turned to look at Mickey. "You´ve done a great job with this place."

There was a note of wonder in Jo´s voice and Mickey couldn´t help but smile a little, "Thanks, I thought I might as well make it as comfortable as possible since I was going to live here for two years. I don´t have much money, Lawrence can´t pay much and most of it goes to food anyway, but what I´ve left I try to spend on something that´ll make it look nicer."

The spicy smell from the bags on her table won over her reservation and she walked over to peak inside, her mouth starting to water when she saw the many white cartons. A loud rumble from her stomach caused her to blush furiously and Jo raised an eyebrow, smirking lightly, "I take it we are feeling better?"

Mickey smiled sheepishly as she found two plates and some cutlery, placing everything on the table next to the bags. "Yeah, looks like it. Actually, I think I was just tired. I´ve been working quite a lot lately with too little sleep and it just caught up with me today."

Jo nodded, looking a little apprehensively at the two plates. Mickey noticed the look and said quietly, "Have you eaten?"

"Uh, no, but…" Jo shook her head. "I wasn´t going to… I mean, it´s for you. I got it all for you."

"Jo?" Mickey waited until the lieutenant´s eyes were on her again. "Why did you bring me this?"

Jo opened her mouth, but it took a few seconds before any actual words came out, "I… I wanted to… to thank you. Doctor Lawrence told me if it hadn´t been for you giving blood Frederic would´ve died. I thought that that," she gestured at the bags, "was the least I could do. And also, you stitched me up real nice…"

"That was three weeks ago, Jo," Mickey said slightly bemused, "and besides, you don´t have to thank me for doing my job. It´s what I´m here for."

"Treating agents endangers the entire clinic," the lieutenant replied seriously. "And I know that the Organisation is very bad at rewarding selfless acts like that, and if it weren´t for you we wouldn´t have anywhere to turn to, so please," she gestured at the bags again. "Please sit down and eat. It´s all for you."

Mickey was silent for a moment, then she bit her lip thoughtfully, "Is the food from you or from the Organisation, Jo?"

"Well," Jo drew out the word, "it´s a little of both. It´s the Organisation´s money, but money they´ve given me to do with as I choose as long as it serves their purposes."

"And feeding me serves their purposes?" Mickey grinned and got an answering one from Jo.

"Well, it serves mine which ultimately serves theirs."

And how exactly am I supposed to interpret that remark, Jo? Mickey thought as she watched Jo begin taking cartons out of the bag.

As she´d said to Jo it had been three weeks since they´d met in the clinic and after Jo had left with the wounded soldier in a car the next morning, she hadn´t heard from her since. Not that she´d assumed she would. The last couple of hours before the car had arrived had been spent in silence, neither exactly avoiding eye contact, but not attempting to get it either and she had been almost relieved when Jo had left. Although it didn´t take long before she started berating herself for not getting a few answers to some of the questions she´d been carrying around with her for the last fifteen months.

She wasn´t sure what she´d feared the most. That Jo wouldn´t remember what she was referring to or that she would say that she did remember, but simply hadn´t found it important enough to give much thought. She did suspect, however, that Jo wasn´t as oblivious as she might seem when it came to what had happened between them in Vega 3. Her reaction to her question about Dane told her that much, but if that really was the case then she couldn´t understand why Jo would continue to dance around the subject, instead of just getting it over with. Admit what happened, that it was stupid, a mistake, and that it would never happen again.

"Mickey? Your food is getting cold."

Mickey blinked then looked at Jo who was standing next to the couch, regarding her expectantly. "Well, we can´t have that, can we?"

***************

It took a bit of persuading, but finally Jo agreed to stay and eat some of the food as well, Mickey claiming there was no way she could eat it all alone, and since the tiny fridge in her room was more than a little unreliable, she probably wouldn´t be able to save it for later. Jo had offered to take a look at the fridge, but Mickey had just told her to sit down and make herself comfortable while she found something for them to drink.

They´d sat side by side on the couch, eating quietly and without talking much, but as the cartons emptied and the beers Mickey had produced did as well, the young doctor started to feel more at ease in Jo´s presence and became more talkative, which inevitably led to the lieutenant becoming less monosyllabic and she actually took off her jacket, placing it on the couch behind her and altogether seemed to be more comfortable and less likely to bolt from the room any second.

"God! I´m stuffed," Mickey complained good-humouredly, pushing the last box away from her in disgust. "I can´t remember the last time I´ve eaten that much."

Jo who´d finished eating awhile ago took a sip from her beer as she studied Mickey´s body closely, subconsciously frowning when she noticed that the doctor was slightly thinner than she remembered.

"Don´t you get enough to eat?"

Mickey looked at her in surprise, glad for the dim light that hid her blush as she felt Jo´s eyes on her, "Well, yes, I… I mean, it´s not that I don´t have enough money to buy food or anything. It´s just I have very little time to go shopping. I´m usually too tired when I get back from the clinic and the few times I´ve got a day off, I´d like to do something else than shopping for groceries."

"Like sleeping all day?" Jo inquired pleasantly and Mickey gave her a small grin. "Something like that."

"I understand that." Jo emptied the beer and put the bottle down on the table. "But you have to remember to eat occasionally, otherwise your body won´t be able to keep up with the pace you´re setting."

"What do you know about the pace I´m setting?"

The lieutenant smiled briefly, searching out Mickey´s eyes, "You may not be aware of it yourself, Doc, but you´re quite the celebrity among us. There isn´t a single agent in Neo Roma who hasn´t heard about the young, dedicated doctor who takes so good care of everybody, no matter who, or what, they are." Jo looked away, her gaze focused on nothing in particular. "Actually, sometimes I think some of them make out their injuries to be more severe than they are just so they can come see you."

Mickey smiled, a warm, cosy feeling enveloping her body, "Really?"

Jo nodded, "Really."

Silence fell between them, but it wasn´t awkward or uncomfortable and Mickey was again reminded of the relaxed, quiet days back in Vega 3 when she would sit on Jo´s bed, waiting for the cadet to finish the chapter so she could start quizzing her about it.

Suddenly Jo spoke again, "When do you have to be at work?"

"Uh… I usually leave around 6 am, that way I don´t have to hurry if the guards at the wall are busy." She stretched, thoroughly enjoying the hedonistic pleasure the small act brought her.

"So you meet up with Doctor Lawrence and his wife at the wall?" Jo asked and Mickey thought she noticed something odd in the lieutenant´s voice, but came to the conclusion she was imagining things, probably due to the three beers she´d had which had been a little more than she had intended, but the food had been very spicy and Jo had been drinking quite a lot herself and hadn´t seem to care.

"Oh no, I meet them at the clinic instead. They´re usually there a few minutes before I arrive."

"So…" Jo turned her head and looked directly at her. "What you´re saying is that you go all the way to the clinic through the Slums alone? With nobody to look out for you?"

The disbelief in Jo´s voice was impossible to ignore and Mickey´s brow furrowed angrily, "I can take care of myself, Jo. I don´t need anybody to look out for me! I´m quite capable of that myself."

The lieutenant was obviously taken aback by her outburst and Mickey instantly expected to see the by now well known cold anger in the blue eyes, but to her surprise Jo´s eyes just grew hooded and guarded instead, and then her gaze dropped to the floor.

"I didn´t mean it like that, Mickey," she said quietly. "I know you can take care of yourself, it´s just… the Slums… well, it´s not the best of neighbourhoods and a lot of… of bad things happen there." She raised her head and met confused green eyes which were searching her face intently, "I don´t want any of the bad things happening to you, Mickey."

"You don´t?" Mickey breathed, feeling how she was caught up in brilliant blue eyes and was helpless to do anything about it.

Jo shook her head, a small, hesitant smile flickering across her face. For a long moment they looked into each other´s eyes and Mickey almost forgot to breathe.

Then Jo broke eye contact and abruptly rose form the couch, "I gotta go. The bridge closes at midnight tonight so I´ll have to hurry."

Mickey inhaled quietly then looked at her watch, "It´s ten to twelve already, Jo. You won´t make it." She rose from the couch as well and said as calmly as possible, "Why don´t you stay here tonight? I know the couch is too short for you to be comfortable, but my bed is big enough for both of us. It wouldn´t be a problem."

Jo blinked a few times, her mouth silently opening and closing again before she cleared her throat, "Uh… I don´t know, Mickey… I mean, it´s very nice of you to offer, but it really isn´t a problem. I´ll just walk around for awhile until they open the bridge for traffic again."

"That´s four hours from now, Jo," Mickey spoke gently, studying the lieutenant´s face with interest. "I really wouldn´t be comfortable knowing you´re walking around alone outside at night in December, and although this is the Suburbs, this particular part is close enough to the Slums to be dangerous. Please, Jo…" She reached out and put a reassuring hand on Jo´s arm. "Just stay, okay. I´m tired, you´re tired, and we both need to sleep. What´s so bad about that?"

Jo bit her lip uncertainly, gazing at the warm hand on her arm then she shrugged a little, taking a step back so Mickey had to let go, "Okay, I´ll stay, but…" She paused, blue eyes becoming challenging, "But only on the condition that you´ll let me walk you to work tomorrow. I know-," she hurried to say as she saw Mickey´s brow furrow, "that you can take care of yourself and I´m not insinuating anything, but, really, I´d feel much more comfortable knowing you´re not walking through the Slums alone… In December," she added with a small smirk.

Mickey just shook her head, raising her hands in defeat, "Okay, okay. You got a deal, Jo, but let´s go to bed shall we. I have to be at work in six hours."

Jo nodded and a couple minutes later they were lying side by side in the bed, a few inches apart and they actually managed to fall asleep pretty quickly. Something neither of them had thought possible.

***************

Chapter Twenty-Two

The music was pounding loudly and the heavy bass rhythm was making the entire dance floor vibrate under the feet of the dancers moving closely around each other. An almost palpable sense of anticipation and excitement was in the air, fighting for dominance against the smell of sweat, perfume and various kinds of artificial and not so artificial smoke making it difficult to breathe. Motionlessly, Jo was watching it all from a distance, tucked away in a dark corner, as far away from the dance floor and the bright flickering light as possible.

The club was loud and crowded, the bodies there producing enough heat to warm up an entire building or two. At least that was what Jo felt as she squirmed uncomfortably in her damp shirt, wishing she´d decided to go with a t-shirt or tank top instead. However, she was so used to wearing something that would conceal her gun that she hadn´t even given it a second thought as she picked the black silk shirt from her closet, and not until she´d had her hand on the door handle and was about to leave her apartment, did she realize that she´d put the weapon down the waistband of her jeans.

For a moment she´d considered bringing the gun anyway, thinking that it couldn´t hurt, but then she´d come to the conclusion that although it wouldn´t be visible, it would most certainly be noticed and felt if a person came close enough and thus she´d left it behind. She didn´t particular want having to stop and answer any uncomfortable questions just as things got interesting, and she couldn´t really be sure that she´d be able to get her clothes off without anybody noticing the gun. And Jo very much intended to get her clothes off tonight, preferably with a willing, hot-blooded and not too innocent member of the female sex.

She had been buried in work lately, not having any time for herself and a couple of failed missions for which she hadn´t been to blame, but with her being in command and ultimately responsible for everything her men did had had to explain to Messina, had all added to the frustration she was feeling lately. And Jo was tired of feeling frustrated, on edge, and she desperately needed to unwind in one way or another.

She wasn´t exactly sure going out and finding someone to spend the night with, or just pushing a girl against the nearest wall for some quick relief, would ease or even cure her frustration, but she thought it was worth a shot.

It had been too long anyway.

At least too long since she´d enjoyed it.

Lost in thought, it took Jo a few seconds before she became aware of a young blond woman leaning against the bar, looking intently at her over the brim of the drink she was currently sipping. She looked away quickly when Jo met her eyes, but it didn´t take long before she cast a surreptitious glance back, and Jo smiled inwardly, coming to the conclusion it had been the proper decision to leave the gun at home.

She carelessly pushed herself away from the wall and sauntered towards the woman at the bar, not bothering to hide her frank appraisal of the blonde´s body. She wasn´t that tall, but had an athletic and slender body barely hidden in a tight emerald coloured dress which Jo found mighty appealing, and she moistened her lips unconsciously as her gaze travelled from the blonde´s legs up her body coming to rest on her face.

Her eyes were beautiful, sparkling and inviting, soundlessly asking the lieutenant to come closer. Jo had always liked pretty eyes and these most certainly were. They were almost as pretty and vibrant as Mickey´s…

Jo stopped abruptly, uncertain confusion showing on her face. The blonde´s eyes were green.

Jo stared into the blonde´s eyes, not paying attention to the small frown beginning to appear on the woman´s face.

Shaking her head angrily to clear her mind of unwanted thoughts and memories, Jo closed the distance between them and roughly caught the blonde´s face between her hands, crushing their mouths together in a fierce and relentless kiss. At first the woman stiffened and she put her hands against Jo´s chest, trying to push her away, but then she relaxed and her arms went around Jo´s neck, her body moulding into the lieutenant´s.

Jo´s hands left the blonde´s face to grab her arse instead and she groaned in satisfaction as she felt the woman press even firmer against her. She tried to push a thigh between the blonde´s legs, but the dress was too tight and although Jo was rapidly getting caught up in the dizzying spiral of lust, she still had enough presence of mind to remember that they were in a public place and that people might not want to witness her tearing the dress from the woman´s body.

But before she could attempt to do anything, she felt a heavy hand on her shoulder, effectively pulling her away from the blonde´s warm and moist mouth.

"Excuse me, ladies," a furiously blushing bouncer said, a large, bulky man, towering over Jo with at least two feet. "But you… you really have to slow things down a little." He cleared his throat, finding he was unable to look any of them in the eye. "This is a public facility, you know and you can´t… can´t just…" He trailed off and Jo threw a glance at the man´s groin. Apparently, he hadn´t had anything against their small display personally. That much was obvious from the bulge in his trousers.

"Want to go somewhere else," a suggestive voice suddenly whispered into Jo´s ear and she shivered involuntarily as she felt hot breath against sentisized skin.

Jo nodded mutely and with one last look at the bouncer put her arm around the blonde´s shoulders and they left the bar together.

***************

Soundlessly, Jo slipped out of bed, quickly gathering her clothes. She dressed quietly with her back to the sleeping woman in the bed, not wanting to risk meeting the blonde´s eyes in case she should wake up before she was done.

It took her a few minutes before she´d located her shoes and jacket which for some reason seemed to have ended up at opposite ends of the small apartment. Then she headed towards the door, but to her surprise found herself hesitating slightly at the end of the bed, her eyes taking in the sight of the soundly sleeping woman.

They had headed straight for the blonde´s apartment after leaving the club, Jo never brought anybody home to her place, and it would´ve been too far to go anyway since the club was in the Suburbs and not in the city. She never went to any clubs in the inner city either, only Josephine Turner did that, and there were quite a few things Jo had done tonight she couldn´t be seen doing there.

Disappearing with another woman from a bar might puzzle or even alienate council member Andreas Lingstrom in case he heard of it, and since Jo had spent the last few weeks trying to get close enough to the man to be let into his house, she wasn´t willing to take the risk for a little carnal satisfaction no matter how convenient the clubs in the city were for that purpose exactly. Subsequently she always went to the Suburbs, finding that she preferred that area to the city, mainly because she wasn´t likely to run into anybody belonging to the elite who all frowned upon the area, thinking it to be little more than a well polished part of the Slums.

Zipping up her jacket, Jo considered briefly if she should leave a note or something and the unexpected thought caused a small frown to appear on her face. The woman seemed to be nice enough, although it was hard to tell since they really hadn´t spoken that much, and it had most certainly been fun in bed, but she´d never thought about doing something like that before, always preferring to leave before dawn, or if the woman woke early enough for a repeat of the night´s performance, then right after that. Some had asked her to call, all knowing she wouldn´t, and Jo couldn´t for the life of her understand why she was even considering changing that comfortable pattern.

It´s just… She… She reminds me of… of… And… and I…

Feeling more confused and unnerved than ever before, Jo left the blonde´s apartment without leaving anything but the memory behind.

***************

"I´m sure you will enjoy this feature a great deal, Josephine, I´ve heard nothing but praise from colleagues and friends who´ve been to see it."

"I´m sure I will, Andreas," Jo smiled pleasantly, lightly touching the council member´s arm, "and I´m so very pleased you were able to tear yourself away from business today. It´s been far too long since I´ve seen you."

"Yes, I know," Lingstrom sighed, gallantly opening the door so Jo could step through. "But you know how it is, business comes first, second and third, and only then you can attempt to find a little free time for yourself. However," he smiled, lightening up his sharp but handsome features, "I´m sure I´ll be able to find a little more time for you in the future." He leaned closer, whispering into her hear, "Would you like that, Josephine?"

Jo gave him a brilliant smile in return, her hand running suggestively down his arm, "I would like that very much, Andreas. Very much indeed."

The man grinned happily then escorted Jo down the aisle to their seats, his hand never leaving her lower back. He pulled down her seat and Jo smiled graciously and sat down, briefly considering keeping her coat on, but realizing that Lingstrom probably would find it strange if she did. So she removed it, folding it to lie in her lap, effectively hiding the slight bulge along her inner thigh underneath the fabric of her trousers.

She knew very well it was a stupid thing to do. It was an unnecessary risk and Messina would greatly disapprove if she heard, but Jo had found herself unable to agree going to the movies with council member Andreas Lingstrom, grandson of the great Jefferson Lingstrom, without carrying a weapon of sorts. She simple couldn´t. The guy gave her the creeps and she wasn´t sure she´d be capable of enduring an entire evening in his company without the soothing presence of some kind of weapon nearby.

A gun had been out of the question, particularly with Lingstrom´s tendency to always put his arm around her back and a shoulder holster hadn´t been possible either, so she had settled for a knife instead, too late realizing that the position she´d chosen for the blade might not have been one of her wisest decisions.

A wicked smile crossed Jo´s face as she pictured the expression on the council member´s face if he tried to put his hand of her thigh and felt a knife instead of warm skin, then she sighed quietly, inwardly chastising herself for losing focus while working. She´d do whatever she had to do to get into Lingstrom´s house and his safe. Of course, she might not like what she´d have to do, and probably wouldn´t, but she´d do it nonetheless. She always had. It was what was expected of her. It was what was expected of all the Organisation´s undercover agents, and Jo expected nothing less from her own subordinates. Nothing but serving the cause mattered. Nothing.

That was what she´d been told every single day of her life since she was eight years old and Jo believed it fully and agreed with it wholeheartedly. At least… most of the time.

The light dimmed and Jo hadn´t seen more than a few trailers before she felt a hand come to rest gently on her thigh. Fortunately it was the one without the knife and Jo exhaled silently, bracing herself for the film and what else might happen, unnoticed by everyone else in the darkness of the theatre.

***************

Halfway running down the street, Mickey knew she´d have to hurry if she was going to reach the bridge before it was closed at midnight. Her small trip into the city had taken longer than she´d had expected and the Friday evening crowd had made it almost impossible to get anywhere faster than a turtle with a limp.

Hurrying across the street, she ignored all the angry horns and curses from the motorists barely managing to break before they´d have hit her. Mickey just grinned as she continued to run down the street, not feeling the least guilty about upsetting the rich and powerful. Besides, it was cold and dark now and she really wanted to get home and get some warmth back into her freezing hands and feet. Of course, it the heat was off like it had been last night she might as well stay outside. She wouldn´t be able to tell the difference anyway.

Warm clouds of steam enveloped her face as she ran on and soon Mickey felt the telltale signs of having inhaled too much cold air too quickly and she had to slow down and resume in a slightly more leisurely pace. However, it didn´t really matter she noticed as she glanced at her watch. She had made up for lost time and unless something really out of the extraordinary happened, she would have time enough to reach the bridge before midnight. It was only 10:30 and it shouldn´t take more than half an hour, forty-five minutes to get there.

Just as she´d finished the last thought, something ahead of her caught her attention and she slowed down uncertainly until she came to a full stop, green eyes widening in shock. Ahead of her, only twenty yards away was Jo, engaged in a rather heated kiss with a tall and immaculately dressed man. With her mouth slightly open, Mickey watched as the couple moved apart and her eyebrows disappeared behind her bangs as she recognized the fair skinned man with the curly brown hair who was now talking intently to Jo.

She watched Jo shake her head a few times, all the while the lieutenant kept a pleasant, almost coy smile on her face and then it hit her.

Suddenly feeling nauseous, Mickey had to look away and as she raised her head again she saw Andreas Lingstrom get into a large black BMW which had pulled up next to the pavement. The council member gave Jo who was still standing on the pavement a small wave, and then the car door closed and the car drove away, leaving Jo alone in the darkness in front of the cinema.

Unable to tear her eyes away, Mickey watched as Jo remained perfectly still for a few seconds then she spat violently a couple of times before wiping her mouth on the sleeve of her coat. A hand disappeared into a pocket and even from the distance Mickey recognized the small roll Jo produced, quickly popping three mints into her mouth.

Putting the roll back into her pocket, Jo stood indecisively, her left hand absently tapping against her thigh and Mickey suddenly felt she had to get away before Jo discovered her, but before she could will her feet to move, Jo turned her head and stared directly at her.

Deciding to take some initiative, Mickey began to walk towards the lieutenant, feeling slightly worried by the pale grim look on Jo´s face and the distant and lifeless expression in her eyes.

"Jo…" She began hesitantly as they were only a few feet apart. "Jo, are you all right?"

The dark lieutenant just stared at her and to Mickey it felt like Jo wasn´t even recognizing her, but then a small flicker of life returned to the blue eyes.

"Mickey…" Jo´s voice was hoarse and raspy. "What are you doing here?"

"I… I had the day off so I thought I´d do a bit of…" Mickey faltered as she realized Jo wasn´t really listening, but was staring dully at the pavement instead and her stomach suddenly felt like it was tied up in painful knots. Jo was obviously not all right, but she had no idea what to do about it and knew only too well that Jo wouldn´t appreciate her trying.

After a few minutes of uneasy silence Jo looked up, "You shouldn´t be here, Mickey. You… you should stay in the Suburbs, it´s not.. it´s not good for you here… I mean, I… I don´t want you to… to…" She stopped herself and straightened up, a bit of colour returning to her face. "I´ll walk you home. The bridge´s closing soon, so we´ll have to hurry."

Without waiting for a reply she turned and started to walk down the street and after a moment of staring after her in bewilderment and confusion, Mickey followed.

For almost ten minutes they walked side by side down the rapidly emptying street, neither speaking a word. Mickey shot a few furtive glances at Jo and couldn´t help but notice that the lieutenant was continually licking her lips, occasionally taking a new mint into her mouth. Mickey shivered involuntarily.

"Are you cold?"

Mickey turned her head and looked at Jo in surprise, then nodded slightly. It was cold and the wind sweeping through the streets wasn´t making it better, but that hadn´t been the reason why she´d shivered.

"Want my coat?"

Jo had stopped and was looking at her, the expression in her eyes neither friendly nor annoyed. Just indifferent, like she didn´t care either way. Mickey shook her head, "No, I don´t want you to be cold as well. I´ll be home soon, I´ll manage."

The lieutenant nodded and without a word they continued down the now completely deserted street. However, after a couple of minutes Mickey couldn´t take the heavy silence any longer, and although she knew she might regret it, she heard herself say, "I saw you tonight."

For awhile they walked on in silence then Jo spoke softly, "I know." She exhaled slowly, not looking in Mickey´s direction, "I´m sorry."

"Why?" Mickey asked quietly, not looking at Jo either.

"I… I didn´t want you to see that."

This time Mickey raised her head, searching the immobile dark face beside her, "Why not? I know why you´re here, Jo. I know that you´ll have to do certain things as a part of your job. It…" She paused, then continued carefully, "It doesn´t make you any less in my eyes."

Jo turned her head to stare out at the dark river flowing past them. The wind was even more strong here, blowing directly into their faces and Jo felt tears come to her eyes and she angrily blinked them away, but for some reason they kept coming.

***************

Chapter Twenty-Three

"I was supposed to have gone home with him tonight."

Jo had spoken so softly that Mickey almost hadn´t heard it. She glanced briefly ahead of them towards the guards who were busy checking the papers of the people standing in line in front of them, then she looked back at Jo.

"Why didn´t you?"

Jo regarded her thoughtfully for a moment, appearing to be contemplating the question thoroughly. Then a tiny grin showed on her face, "He was so damn embarrassing."

Of all the answers Mickey had expected, this was not one on them.

"What?!" She stared at Jo incredulously. "Embarrassing? What do you mean by embarrassing?"

"Well," Jo grinned a little as they moved a couple of feet closer to the guards. "In the cinema he kept laughing in the wrong places, and he was constantly cheering the hero, giving him good advice. Really loud." She rolled her eyes, "God, it was so embarrassing! I was this close clubbing him so he would shut up!"

For a second Mickey just stared at Jo then she broke down laughing uncontrollably, tears running down her cheeks. Jo glanced around quickly, slightly uncomfortable by Mickey´s strong reaction, but the blonde´s laughter was too infectious and it wasn´t long before she joined her, feeling how all the stress and tension of the last couple of weeks momentarily left her body, leaving her feeling calm and relaxed instead. And tired. So very tired.

Still chuckling they were waved past the guards who obviously were just as eager to get home to a warm bed as everybody else.

"I can´t believe you said that," Mickey wiped her eyes, clearing her throat. "Was it really that bad?"

"You´ve no idea." Jo shook her head in disbelief. "I was totally flabbergasted! I mean, it´s not exactly what you´d expect from one of the most powerful and feared persons in the Realm, is it?"

"No," Mickey smiled. "Not exactly." She grew more sombre as they walked over the long bridge leading them to the Suburbs, debating silently with herself whether she should ask her next question.

"Was that the only reason why you didn´t go home with him?"

Jo looked at her strangely, obviously surprised by the sudden change of subject or perhaps the question itself, then she shrugged, feigning an offhandedness she didn´t quite feel, "I wasn´t drunk enough. Usually it´s not a problem, but with him… I don´t know…" Jo shrugged again, "I just don´t like him." She sighed deeply then mumbled under her breath, almost too low for Mickey to hear, but not quite, "I´ll have to be a lot more drunk to sleep with him that´s for sure."

They walked the rest of the way to Mickey´s apartment in silence.

***************

Jo didn´t object as Mickey asked her to come up. Besides, she wouldn´t make it back to the bridge in time anyway. As Mickey had feared the room was freezing and except from their coats and shoes they climbed fully clothed into Mickey´s bed, both wincing under the cold covers.

"Is it always like this," Jo inquired while stifling a yawn, feeling her eyelids grow heavy.

"Sometimes," Mickey shifted slightly, trying to get more comfortable. For some reason she just wasn´t able to relax. "The last week has been particularly bad. I´ve been taking cold showers for three days."

"Well, it´s supposed to be very healthy," Jo smirked, not feeling the least sympathetic. "You being a doctor should know that."

"Haha," Mickey reached out and gave Jo´s thigh a friendly slap under the covers, then she stiffened, her hand resting lightly on the lieutenant´s thigh. Jo quirked an eye open when Mickey´s hand didn´t move and turned her head slightly look at the blonde who was smiling broadly.

"Is that a knife I feel, Delaine? Or are you just glad to see me?"

Jo just arched an eyebrow good-naturedly and reached down to remove her hand, "Very funny, Mickey. Now go to sleep, will ya? I´m tired."

"Oh, all right," Mickey conceded with a small smile, unconsciously curling up on her side so she was facing Jo who had closed her eyes again and appeared to be close to falling asleep. However, the more Mickey tried to force herself to relax and fall asleep, the more awake and restless she felt, and Jo´s close proximity wasn´t improving the situation. In fact, the dark lieutenant lying so peacefully beside her was the very reason for her discomfort.

Get a grip, girl! You´ve done this before, remember? You didn´t have any trouble falling asleep then, so why should it be different now? Mickey squeezed her eyes tightly, I don´t know! It just is, okay! She´s so close, only a few inches away. All I would have to do is…

Mickey´s eyes flew open again, deciding that that line of thought was way too dangerous and subsequently it was quickly replaced by another less dangerous, but much more desolate one.

Suddenly Mickey was filled with anger and she barely restrained herself from striking the silent woman beside her, but just as soon as it had arrived, the anger left her again and she felt nothing but resigned sadness in its wake.

Mickey knew her eyes were brimming with tears, but she did nothing to stop them. She didn´t care anymore. Almost, as if having a life of its own, her hand reached out to gently push a lock of black hair away from Jo´s forehead and from there it continued, gently tracing a pronounced cheekbone, her fingers coming to rest on the warm skin in the hollow of Jo´s throat. She moved her fingers slowly, now feeling the smooth texture of the scar disappearing beneath Jo´s collar, then her hand was caught in an iron grip.

"What are you doing?"

Jo´s voice wasn´t exactly accusing, but it wasn´t pleasant either. However, right now Mikcey couldn´t care less. She raised her head and stared defiantly into slightly sleepy blue eyes, "I´m touching you."

It was a statement more than anything and it obviously wasn´t what Jo had expected because her brow furrowed and she was silent a second or two before continuing, "Why?"

"Because I want to, Jo. Because I like touching you and apparently the only time I get to do that is when you´re dead drunk or unconscious." She tried to pull her hand free from Jo´s grip, but the lieutenant was too strong. "Let go, Jo. I won´t touch you anymore, I promise. You´re safe here, it won´t happen again."

All the while she had spoken she had watched a myriad of conflicting emotions cross Jo´s face, ranging from apprehension and confusion to the beginning of anger and, Mickey felt her heart skip a beat, if she wasn´t quite mistaken, a flash of desire, too.

For a long moment they stared into each other´s eyes then Jo abruptly released her hand and without a word stood up, starting to unbutton her shirt.

Mickey stared at her, not knowing what to make out of Jo´s sudden change of behaviour.

"Jo? Jo, what are you doing?"

The lieutenant didn´t meet her eyes as she finished the last button and slid the shirt over her shoulders, letting it fall to the floor. Her hands moved to her belt and as she began to undo it, she lifted her head to look at the confused woman in the bed, her blue eyes weary and indifferent.

"I´m very tired, Mickey, I think you should know that, but if you want me to sleep with you, I will." The belt was now history and she unsnapped her jeans, "Besides, I guess it´s only fair since I owe you."

Too shocked to speak and refusing to believe that she was actually hearing what she couldn´t be, Mickey just stared at Jo, anger slowly appearing in her eyes.

"Who the hell do you think you are, Jo! You stupid arsehole! How dare you talk to me like that!? How dare you!?"

She scrambled out of the bed, past the stunned lieutenant to the door, roughly pulling it open.

"Get out! Get out of here right now! I don´t ever want to see you again!"

"Mickey, I-"

"Shut up, Jo! I don´t want to hear anything you got to say. Just leave." All the anger suddenly left Mickey´s body and she practically whispered, "Please… Please, Jo… Just leave, okay?"

***************

"No."

"What part of `just leave´ don´t you understand, Jo? I want you to go. If you have any respect for me at all please do as I ask."

"I do have respect for you!" Jo answered forcefully as she took a step forward. "I have more respect for you than anybody else."

Mickey sighed, not caring to hide the tears in her eyes, "Then why would you say something like that to me? If you have any respect for me why would you treat me like that?"

"I…I…" Jo stuttered helplessly. "I thought it was what you wanted." Her voice turned defensive, "It was you who were touching me, remember! Not the other way around."

Mickey regarded her sadly, "You just don´t get it, do you, Jo? You have no idea what I´m talking about and the worst part is that you probably never will."

Shaking her head lightly she closed the door and walked past the unmoving lieutenant to sit down on the bed, staring blankly at her hands in her lap. Then a low and rough voice made her look up.

"I´m sorry. I… I never meant to make you feel bad." Jo kneeled down before her so they were eye to eye, "I wasn´t trying to offend you in any way, really, I swear." The blue eyes were sincere and desperate to be believed. "It´s just… with the stuff you said, I thought… I thought it was what you wanted. I never meant to hurt you."

"Jo, I…" Mickey began, but then realized how futile it would be for her to explain to Jo why it was she had been so hurt, and she was also too exhausted to begin any lengthy explanation, so instead she decided to keep it basic. Keep it on a level Jo would understand.

"Jo, I know now you didn´t mean to hurt me, but don´t you understand how it feels to have someone offering to go to bed with you almost like it´s some kind of business deal? A pay off? You were as interested in sleeping with me as you would´ve been polishing your shoes. How do you think that makes me feel, Jo? That you´re offering to be with me as part of a favour, because you feel you owe me?"

"It wasn´t like that."

"What?"

"I said, it wasn´t like that," Jo repeated slightly louder, but not much, her eyes darting around nervously, never completely resting on Mickey´s face. "I wouldn´t have said what I did if I didn´t find you attractive and I do. Very much."

"You do?" Mickey asked softly, unable not to.

The dark head nodded vigorously, "Yes, very. And… and I know it didn´t sound like it at the time, but… but I…" Jo faltered then took a deep breath and met Mickey´s eyes, "I did want be with you, Mickey." She paused again before adding quietly, "And I still do."

As Mickey looked into expectant blue eyes, she knew she shouldn´t. She knew she would only hurt herself more in the end and that whatever happened between Jo and her tonight, it wouldn´t mean the same to Jo as it would to her. She knew if she went forward, the carefully constructed walls around her heart would fall to pieces and crumble the moment Jo´s lips met hers.

And then she didn’t think anymore because in that moment she felt exactly that and she slowly opened her mouth to let Jo inside.

Continued...