~ Taking Chances ~
by Eveh
Disclaimer: This is an alternative story. This is a sequel to Black and Blue which is a sequel to Expected Surprise which is a sequel to Blind Charade which is a sequel to Unknown Factor which is a sequel to Infrequent Liaisons which is a sequel to Your Weakness Is Me. It's necessary to read the others to understand this one. Remember that this is the Versions of Fate series because I've named it now.
Love/Sex Warning: Not really.
Language: Mild.
Thanks: To the ability to keep on going along. And to everyone reading this series.
Write me at: xengab01@hotmail.com
Taking Chances
By Eveh
Tamera sat in the den and waited for her husband to come home from work. It had been a month since she had lost the baby-- a month's worth of very critical analysis of her life. She had finally come to her decision and had Kelli to thank for helping her get there. Her life was no longer working for her--it hadn't been for a while. It was time she made a great change because she was now ready to take on the unknown. She would move forward with her life and she would do so alone.
Morgan hadn't been there for her after she left the hospital. The brunette had become withdrawn taking the loss of the child harder than most expected or maybe it wasn't the loss of the child that had caused her to shy away in torment, but instead maybe it was her guilt. Morgan blamed herself for giving into her desire for Tamera and in doing so believed she was a part of the reason why Tamera lost the baby and she could never forgive herself for that. At least, Morgan believed she couldn't until Lacey played the part of the best friend and forced Morgan to realize that it really wasn't her fault. Still, Morgan had stayed away from Tamera. She didn't want to cause the woman anymore pain.
Nathan walked into the house with a smile on his face, as he often did. He saw Tamera waiting for him and knew that the time had finally come. He wasn't a stupid man, he could tell that his wife was drifting away from him and nothing he could do was going to keep her with him, and the packed bags by the door were a sure hint. Things had changed since she lost the baby and he didn't know what he could do to make things better, to return things to how they were before. He had heard before about how marriages were torn apart with this kind of tragedy and he loathed that he could fit into that statistic, but if Tamera needed to be away from him to be happy then he would let her go. He would love her forever and no one could ever replace her, but he would let her go. Anyway, he still had his sister and his other family to support him.
"Nathan, I think we need to talk." Tamera's voice held the confidence that was part of what made Nathan fall in love with her so completely. It seemed that in this past month, Tamera had also gotten in touch with herself again. Before, it seemed like she was drifting around with no direction but now she had that look in her eyes that meant she was focused and had direction. Nathan loved that look.
Nathan's shoulders fell. The weight of his loss had fallen onto him and he could no longer push it away. "Can you just tell me if there's someone else?"
Tamera wasn't surprised by the question. "No." It wasn't a lie. "There's no one anymore."
Nathan nodded his head. "If I let you go will you ever come back?"
Tamera didn't want to crush any hope he had left, but she couldn't allow him to have hope anymore. If she did then his hope would become her hope and she didn't need to fall into that trap. She needed to be free. "No," Tamera sighed heavily, "this has to be it Nathan. I love you so much, but we were never really meant to be together forever. I know that's what you wanted, but we both know it was never meant to be forever."
"Where will you go?"
"I'm going to be staying with Kelli for a while. After that I think I'm just going to go home."
"Home? Tamera you haven't been home since we got married."
"I miss my sister. It's about time I let her know that I know she's still alive."
"Doesn't Kelli live with Lacey now?"
"She does."
"Won't that be weird?"
"How so?"
"Well, Lacey is Morgan's best friend. Won't you being so close to someone who's close to the family be awkward for you? You could always rent an apartment for a while until you're ready to go home. We can afford it."
"I think I rather not be alone."
"Well if you change your mind then call me and let me know."
"I will."
"Is there anything that you need?"
"Why are you being so accommodating?" Tamera asked frustrated. She needed Nathan to be angry with her. She needed to be the bad guy.
"Because I love you and I understand that you're not happy with me and I want you to be happy. Tamera that's all I ever wanted."
Tamera began to cry. She had to ask herself just one more time why she was leaving this wonderful man. Why she was leaving this man who would always be a good provider, a good father, a wonderful partner, a wonderful everything. Oh yes, she didn't love him like a lover should anymore. She didn't love him as much as he loved her.
A knock came at the door and Tamera knew it would be Kelli coming to pick her up. She had called the woman and asked her to come over a little after Nathan normally arrived home because she didn't want to stay around Nathan longer than she needed. If given half the chance he would be able to successfully change her mind. He would have her staying with him just to see if they could work things out.
Nathan turned and opened the door--he had never stepped that far from it. Kelli gave him an awkward smile knowing that she was arriving at a very pivotal moment. Lacey had argued with her telling her to just let Tamera take care of everything on her own. Her girlfriend had believed that Tamera didn't need a crutch to lean on because it would do her absolutely no good to become reliant on Kelli. In response Kelli had just brought up the relationship Lacey had with Morgan and Lacey had remained silent on the issue ever since.
Tamera and Morgan's relationship had had a weird affect on Lacey and Kelli's. As their friends' commitment had waned theirs had grown stronger. As their friends' were breaking apart theirs was becoming even more unified. As their friends' were saying goodbye and avoiding one another they were celebrating their union. It seemed that being witness to love fail made them value their own relationship so much more even though they were tending to a different part of the broken couple.
Kelli had taken on the responsibility of being Tamera's best friend when she and Lacey had shown up at the hospital to give their support. Tamera had no one by her side who she could talk to and who would hold her utmost confidence and allegiance. Lacey had already sworn her loyalty to Morgan and could not serve two masters. Kelli saw this need in Tamera-- the need to confess and be held back from judgment-- and she was willing to meet it. Her choice had, at first, brought contention in her relationship with Lacey, but Lacey being the overly logical being that she was understood Tamera's need and Kelli's response.
"Are you ready to go Tamera?" Kelli asked making it a point not to acknowledge Nathan. She couldn't stand seeing the man's broken heart.
"Yes, my stuff is by the door." Tamera pointed to her bags. "I'll just get everything else later."
Kelli grabbed two suitcases and left the other two for Tamera. She turned and walked out of the house letting Nathan and Tamera say their parting words in private. No words were spoken however. Tamera walked to the door and picked up the last two suitcases and walked out. There were not words and there was no look back. She closed the door gently but firmly.
Lacey was in the car waiting for them both which surprised Tamera because she figured Lacey would stay as far away from the situation as possible. "Why are you here?" The blonde didn't want to appear rude, but she couldn't help but ask. "Won't Morgan force you to report back?"
Lacey raised her brow. "Morgan doesn't even know you're leaving your husband, why would she have me report back to her?"
That's when a certain reality finally pushed its way through Tamera's mind. Morgan wasn't a part of her life anymore. This time their month apart didn't make their desires grow. Their need for another didn't turn into its normal flame of utmost need that could not be tamed unless they were together. Their time apart this time, was cold. It was very cold.
"Tamera are you okay?" Kelli recognized the look in Tamera's green eyes. It was the very same she herself had carried when she realized she was living a life that was missing something; a kind of something that made her life warm again.
"You haven't been telling Morgan what's going on?" Tamera easily ignored Kelli's concern. "Why wouldn't you tell her? Does she not want to know?"
Lacey didn't want to answer the questions. Her conversations with Morgan were private and confidential, but Lacey did hate to see both women suffer because of their own damned misguided views of what suddenly gaining a conscience meant. "Morgan has no idea what's going on, but that's because I don't volunteer information and Morgan hasn't gathered her courage to ask yet. I'm pretty sure that she's afraid I might tell her you're happy, so she seems to just be avoiding the subject altogether now. It would seem she wants you to be happy, but if it's without her then she really doesn't want to know about it. She's just afraid to take a chance and ask me anything."
"That stubborn woman," Tamera said to herself.
"Yes stubborn," Lacey absently agreed. "So are you going to get into the car so that we can drive happily off into the sunset or are you going to stand there and ponder the workings of a confused mind?"
Tamera silently got into the backseat of Lacey's Lexus. Kelli shut the trunk then got in on the passenger's side. Lacey started up the car and pulled away from Tamera's now former home. "So am I just driving aimlessly with no direction or do we have someplace we're going?"
"Just take us home," Kelli answered. "We have to drop some of this load off before we can go anywhere."
The end, but not really.
Continued in Drowning Stupidity
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