~ Drowning Stupidity ~
by Eveh
Disclaimer: This is an alternative story. This is a sequel to Taking Chances which is a sequel to Black and Blue which is a sequel to Expected Surprise which is a sequel to Blind Charade which is a sequel to Unknown Factor which is a sequel to Infrequent Liaisons which is a sequel to Your Weakness Is Me. It's necessary to read the others to understand this one. Remember that this is the Versions of Fate series because I've named it that.
Love/Sex Warning: Not really.
Language: It gets kind of bad in this one.
Thanks: To songs that inspire and friends that are met unexpectedly. And to everyone reading this series.
Write me at: xengab01@hotmail.com
Drowning Stupidity
By Eveh
Morgan sank lower in the bathtub allowing the water to cover her entire torso. The water was fairly warm and it was doing a good job of relaxing her tight muscles. She was beginning to feel more relaxed than she had been in quite a while. This was her first day off of work in a long while. She had been overworking herself for the past three months for reasons she only understood. Kevin had left her, and most people blamed her broken heart for her long and late hours of work and her melancholy attitude.
A nurse had actually called her melancholy to her face. Morgan could hardly believe it. She was aiming to be perceived as an angry scorned woman, instead of melancholy. Kevin could never have broken her heart and make her melancholy. She was actually quite happy when he left. When he left he told her that he wanted to actually be in a committed relationship and he knew he couldn't have one with her. Morgan didn't bother to argue with him, she just let him walk out the door happy that she no longer had to worry about being half of a relationship. There was already too much for her to worry and think about, she didn't want to worry about a fake relationship too.
Now, was actually the first time she had stopped thinking about anything. Her thoughts were too often plagued with circumstances beyond her control and she was quite tired of thinking about them. Her body and mind were too tired now. When she closed her eyes she just focused on the darkness and let her mind fall into it. She needed to just relax.
When Lacey walked into the bathroom she was greeted with the comfortable looking form of her best friend. She was happy that Morgan had finally been able to relax a little bit. The woman was starting to worry her. Morgan had been a little too serious recently and she was working herself to death.
Lacey walked further into the bathroom until she was peering directly down at Morgan's sleeping form. She stood there for a few moments waiting until Morgan's sixth sense kicked in and informed her that she was no longer alone. When the sixth sense wasn't kicking in soon enough Lacey just reached down and dunked Morgan's head forcing the woman awake.
"What the hell?" Morgan sputtered through a coughing fit. "Why in the hell did you do that?"
"Get out of the tub, we need to talk." Lacey ordered then walked out of the bathroom. She didn't feel too comfortable standing in front of Morgan's naked form. There were certain boundaries that they could no longer cross.
Morgan gave Lacey's back a dirty look but got out of the tub anyway. The water was getting rather chilly anyway. She wrapped herself up in her robe and stepped out of the bathroom. She wasn't going to even bother getting dressed for Lacey, because she wanted to remain somewhat comfortable if she was about to get yelled out, and she was sure Lacey was going to yell at her.
"What's all this about?" She asked as she ran the towel she grabbed as she left the bathroom through her hair. "I'm assuming you want to get something off your chest or you just like drowning me for some sadistic reason."
Lacey raised her brow. "I got pleasure out of the drowning."
This was an odd admission coming from Lacey and Morgan didn't know quite how to respond. "Oh."
"Don't think too hard about that statement Morgan. We don't want to fry your brain too soon."
"What's wrong with you. Is this Kelli's influence on you? If it is I don't like it. I want the prudish Lacey back."
"We can't all have what we want, but it seems that even those of us that now can have what we want we don't do anything to get."
"What the hell are you talking about, Lacey?" Morgan fell into her couch and propped her feet up on the coffee table. "If you have a point then just fucking get to it."
Lacey sighed and threw her hands up in the air. "You know I don't even know why I try any more. You just don't care anymore do you?"
Morgan turned a cold gaze to her friend. "The fucking point?"
"Fine," Lacey snapped. "You want to play your little games then let's go. I've got the night free because Kelli went to stay with Tamera for the weekend so let's fucking play."
Morgan hadn't seen this side of Lacey in a long time and it kind of frightened her. Lacey was always the epitome of calm, cool and collected. She was always the sane one. She was the voice of reason. Apparently Morgan had pissed Lacey off just one too many times in the past year.
Lacey sauntered over to Morgan until she was standing right in front of her. She swiped Morgan's feet off of the coffee table and took their place. "Let's play now, Morgan." Lacey lowered her voice and Morgan's body shivered involuntarily. "Tamera and your brother are divorced. It was a quick divorce and you know that. Your brother has a broken heart but he'll get over it. Tamera was in town for the whole thing and stayed even three months after the fact waiting to see if you'd even try to contact her. You never did so she left. I kept quite during the whole thing because I believed you'd get a fucking spine and would just claim the love of your life, but apparently you're a lot stupider than I thought."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Of course you don't, because you're fucking stupid."
"Hey!" Morgan didn't quite like when Lacey said things like that. She had emotions just like everyone else and when her best friend called her stupid it affected her.
"What? You angry because I'm speaking the truth now? I've catered to your precious ego way too damn much. So it's time for me to be a bitch."
"Get out of my house," Morgan pointed to the door. "I don't have to take this from you."
"The only way I'm going to do that is if you pick me up and throw me out and we both know I can take you so you just better sit the fuck back and enjoy what I have to say."
"You can't take me."
"Yeah whatever. So now listen to me. You're fucking stupid. Have I already mentioned that?"
Morgan just gave her look that promised immediate death.
"So I have? Then we can move on. You're stupid because you're letting your fear rule your life and that's no way to live."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"You can't do it anymore, Morgan, because I won't let you. I will not let you continue to use your brother as your excuse for never being happy. I can't let you do that Morgan, I just can't. I love you too much to do that."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"You can't do it anymore, Morgan. Your brother loved Tamera and it'll hurt him to see you with her, but he'll get over it. Your family will be surprised but they'll also get over it. You just have to fucking let go."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"You had your taste of happiness and you had years with Tamera where you could pretend that you were with her and you were happy with that. You were happy with being able to sneak around with her when no one was watching because it allowed you to be yourself while not fearing any rejection, but it became too real for you didn't it. You got scared when Tamera said she'd leave Nathan. You backed away from her. When she was pregnant and was with you, you wanted the baby to be yours and when she was willing to leave Nathan you backed away. When she lost her child you backed away. Tamera never did. She just never told anyone about your relationship because she truly didn't want to hurt anyone including you."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"What I don't understand is how you can love someone so much and just let them go. How can you do that Morgan? How are you able to deal with it, because if you ask me it seems that you're not really dealing with it. You're just ignoring it and killing yourself by doing so."
Morgan jumped off the couch and pointed at the door again. "Get the hell out of here."
Lacey remained seated the epitome of calmness. "Did I hit a nerve? If I did then I'm so fucking happy that I did because I'm tired of dealing with your emotionless facade."
"Get. Out."
Lacey looked at Morgan for a long moment then ordered her friend to sit back down, which Morgan did immediately. "I don't really know what you're afraid of, but you have to stop being afraid. You have to because I want you to be happy."
"I don't want her to break my heart," Morgan whispered. "I couldn't handle that."
"You know Tamera better than that. You know she wouldn't do that. She loves you more than anyone she ever has loved or ever will love. You have to open yourself up again to being in love without holding back," Lacey bowed her head and for the first time lost eye contact with her friend. "I hurt you a lot more than I thought I did and I'm very sorry. I never meant to be the cause of all this."
"I loved you more than I ever did anyone, Lacey, and I opened myself up to you. I don't want to be open like that and get hurt again with Tamera. I couldn't live if she did that to me. I love her too much."
"Morgan what happened between us, that was really fucked up. I was really fucked up back then and I know that isn't an excuse because what I did and said was really harsh, but you've got to know that it was all me. I freaked out after I got attacked and I didn't know how to deal and I got lost. I got really lost, but you have to know that I never did blame you for anything, even though I said I did. I got better and it's about time that you did too."
By this point Morgan was crying. She couldn't help but cry. "You can't possibly understand what it was like for me to watch you slowly killing yourself and then just disappear altogether."
"And I don't want to understand," Lacey responded vehemently. "But I will understand if you continue on the road you're on. Your family didn't care about us; they're not going to care about you and Tamera. At least now that she's no longer Nathan's wife?the ever-clueless Nathan. How was it that he never knew about us?"
Morgan laughed. It was all she could do. "He was away at school. Things were easy to keep from him."
"That true." A silence fell over the room and neither of them knew what to say to break it. They hadn't talked about their earlier years since they were actually in the earlier years.
"Do you think that Tamera could ever forgive me?" Morgan finally asked.
"Of course she can. You were able to forgive me and she loves you so much more than you ever loved me and I did a lot worse. Just go and get dressed and I'll take you to her so you can make the relationship with her real. You don't have to hide anymore."
Morgan nodded and began to get up again, but stopped. "Did you tell her about us?"
Lacey shook her head. "No. I did tell Kelli and she was going to tell Tamera. I'm not sure if she has yet or not."
"How did Kelli react?"
"She was surprised and thought I was lying to her. She didn't think I could be that way."
"You couldn't be that way, not anymore." Morgan offered hesitantly. "You came back better."
"Yeah." Lacey closed her eyes for a moment and took in a deep breath. "Go get dressed."
Morgan nodded and went off to her bedroom. Lacey just sat back and tried to forget all the memories that were hammering through the back of her mind. She had more secrets than anyone would ever suspect her of having.
Ten minutes later Morgan stepped back into the room dressed in an old pair of jeans and t-shirt. "What are we going to do once we get wherever it is we're going?"
Lacey stood up and let out a great sigh. "Hopefully we'll get somewhere."
The End But Not of the Series.
Continued In Silence is Violence
The Athenaeum's Scroll Archive