"You know," Margo said days later as Billie prepared to go home. "You should take one of those infant CPR courses."

Billie looked up from her computer. "What?"

"My Cousin Marie's two year old son, Thor, choked on a piece of bread a couple of months ago." Margo said, looking up at Billie. "If she hadn't taken that course, he would have died. They teach you all kinds of good stuff."

Billie's fair eyebrows rose. Margo had just made an excellent point. "Where can I take one of those courses?" She inquired.

"At the police station, there's a doctor from the hospital who teaches it." Margo said, smiling. "I think the next class is in a week."

Billie smiled mischievously. "Been talking to the sheriff again?"

Margo blushed, smiling shyly. "Here and there."

"Right," Billie prolonged the word, winking.

"You are going to take it?" Margo asked, quickly changing the subject, and ignoring the blush that dusted her cheeks.

"Of course I am." Billie said. "I want to be as ready as possible for the babies."

"That's great!" Margo grinned, fumbling around in her desk. "Here's the information."

Billie stood and threw on her jacket. She grabbed the paper and folded it neatly. "Thanks, Margo, I never would have thought of it."

"That's what I'm here for, honey." Margo said. "Oh, and the doctor's a hottie from what I heard."

Billie shrugged. "Makes no difference to me," She said.

"I know, dummy!" Margo rolled her eyes. "I just want you to let me know so I can take the course next time."

Shaking her head and laughing, Billie left the agency for home.

?

Susan Jordan watched her daughter stroll by the front of her shop, a small smile on her face. Billie seemed happy and well adjusted, and didn't even turn her eyes towards the windows to look at her. The news of the twins' arrival had reached Susan's ears months before, at about the time Joseph Marquee died.

She looks good, she thought proudly as she watched her continue on her way down the street.

"When are you going to talk to that child again?"

Susan spun around to stare at her assistant. Anna Jorgensen, the sheriff's mother, had been working with Susan for many years and they were as close as two coworkers could be. When Susan had refused to speak to her daughter, Mrs. Jorgensen had ripped into her, at the risk of loosing her job.

Being the mother of a proud lesbian had taught the elder Jorgensen about life. Her daughter first came out when she was just an officer in the police department, and Anna had very been afraid for her life and career. But Tanya had weathered the initial storm and had reached Sheriff Status in no time. "Times have changed, Susan." She said. "Someday, you'll regret losing eight years."

Susan did not respond, turning away from the windows and moving to her desk.

"She's your only child, Susan!" Anna implored. "What kind of a mother are you?"

Susan had heard this type of tirade from Anna for years, and she had gotten used to them. She sat down hard, taking a deep breath.

Anna moved to sit on the chair on the other side of Susan's desk. "It's only you and her, Susan." She said softly. "You're going to be a grandmother…"

"They're not her kids." Susan said, looking up at her friend.

Anna shook her head. "Maybe not by blood, but they're hers as much as they're Johanna's." She stated.

"You know her?" Susan asked; there was an edge of bitterness in her voice.

"She helped Tanya with buying her house, so I met her a couple of times. That's it." Anna replied. "Anyway, it doesn't matter if I know her. The issue is you and your daughter."

Susan surged forward in her seat. "That's right; the issue is between me and my daughter." She snapped, narrowing her eyes at Anna.

Anna was not intimidated. "That's the point, Susan," she said slowly. "There is nothing between you and your daughter and only you have the power to change that."

Swallowing hard, Susan sat back on her chair, looking away.

Chapter Six

"You sure you don't want to lift your feet?" Billie asked as she helped Johanna settle down on the chair in the kitchen.

Johanna rolled her eyes up at her solicitous lover and sighed. "Honey, take it easy, you're smothering." She said gently.

Billie took a deep breath, realizing that her lover was right. But she was worried. Their visit to the doctor that afternoon had been eventful. Leo had informed them that the babies were in position and had playfully said: "They're about ready to drop." Billie hadn't found it funny, it had actually added to her anxiousness. She had a horrible vision of both babies dropping out while Johanna was using the toilet or something. What reassured her was the fact that there was no dilation yet, so Leo was not worried yet.

As far as the doctor could see, the babies would complete full term inside their mother's womb. Leo had recommended that they get a bag ready for Johanna, for when the moment came. Upon their return, before Billie set out to prepare their dinner, she'd run upstairs and prepared it; she was satisfied only when everything from clothes to a toothbrush were in there.

Johanna, while she remained in a good mood during the day, was not having a good time at night. Sleeping was difficult for her. Lying on her back made it hard for her to breathe; lying on her side pulled at her back muscles and made it uncomfortable. Many a night, Billie has woken to find her lover half sitting against the headboard, pillows, including all of Billie's, supporting her back. Billie would then try to comfort her as much as she could, massaging her lower back on more than one occasion.

"I want you to take me for a walk tonight." Johanna said, bringing Billie back from her thoughts.

"What?" Billie exclaimed, though she'd heard perfectly. "You can't! The doctor said bed rest-"

"A little walk is not going to kill me, Billie." Johanna interrupted hotly. "I'm getting tired of being cooped up in the house!" She felt emotional; being trapped in the house was making her feel like a prisoner. Not being able to work was frustrating, and made her feel useless. Feeling as if she had the weight of two bowling balls in her stomach was a pain in the ass.

The tears gathering in Johanna's eyes made Billie's heart melt. She knelt next to Johanna's chair, taking her smaller hand in hers and squeezing gently. "Don't cry, baby." She whispered, reaching up and gently wiping Johanna's cheeks with her thumbs. She couldn't imagine what her lover was going through. Early on, Lorna had warned her about pregnancy hormones, and how Johanna was bound to get all worked up at some point. Billie knew she was fortunate that it hadn't happened that often, and that Johanna had maintained a pretty jovial mood throughout the pregnancy.

Johanna, embarrassed at her reaction, took a deep, shaky breath. These emotional moments were few and far between, but when they happened, they always caught her unaware. "I'm sorry." She whispered, rubbing her cheeks against the softness and tenderness of Billie's hands.

Billie shook her head, gazing up at her lover. "Don't be sorry." She said softly. She rose up and placed a soft kiss on Johanna's lips.

Johanna hummed, returning the kiss. She loved the feel of Billie's smooth lips. She pulled back a little and met Billie's loving eyes. "I love you so much, Billie." She whispered.

Billie held Johanna's hands in hers, and kissed her lover again. Pulling back, she replied: "And I love you." She gazed into Johanna's eyes for a long moment, and then straightened up. "Lets eat now, and then we can go on that very short walk, okay?"

Johanna chuckled softly; she'd have to appease Billie by making their walk short. "Okay, short walk." She promised.

?

Slowly stepping outside, Johanna took a deep breath of cool night air, enjoying the gentle breeze that steered her hair away from her face. Billie had made sure she was warm before they left the house, supplying her with one of her own thin jackets. They made their way slowly down the front steps, Johanna accepting Billie's solicitous help. She caught her breath at the bottom of the steps, nodding gratefully at a concerned Billie.

After a long moment, she was finally able to take a deep breath. "Okay, I'm ready." They made their way slowly to the sidewalk.

"Johannamasonlee!" Ms. Picket walked very slowly towards the couple, a smile on her wrinkled face.

Johanna smiled fondly as her neighbor slowly made her way down her steps. There had not been a day that she hadn't seen Ms. Picket sitting outside in her stoop. Ms. Picket was a very nice lady, and she'd missed seeing her. "Hi, Ms. Picket."

Billie smiled at the old lady, nodding her own greeting.

Ms. Picket patted Johanna's hard stomach gently, squeezing Billie's forearm in greeting with her other hand. "About ready to drop, eh," She cackled.

Billie rolled her eyes. She wasn't fond of that phrase.

Catching Billie's dismay, Johanna chuckled. "Yes, Ms. Picket, just about there." She was glad that Billie was there next to her, a firm arm around her waist. Being off her feet for so long affected her ability to walk around easily; her legs felt weak and her knees were ready to buckle. Leo had warned them that the anemia, which she had a little controlled with the medicines Johanna was taking, would affect her in that way.

Standing in one spot wasn't helping. Ms. Picket was chatting away, giving advice on babies. Johanna hated to interrupt her, but she had to walk around a little or she'd drop on the spot. "Ms. Picket," She broke in.

Ms. Picket looked at her questioningly. "What is it?"

"I hate to interrupt you like this, but I have to walk around a little. Get some exercise into these legs, you know?" Johanna said apologetically.

"Oh, my dear child, don't you worry. I'll come see you tomorrow, how's that?" The old lady said gently.

Johanna smiled fondly at the woman and nodded. "Okay, see you later, Ms. Picket."

As the couple slowly walked away, Billie sighed with relief. "Thank you for stopping her in her tracks," she chuckled softly into Johanna's ear. She had her arm wrapped around Johanna's waist, holding her close against her body for support. "She sure can talk."

Johanna smiled up at Billie and listened as Billie told her about her last of the six-hour infant CPR courses, and how Leo had presented everyone present with certificates. She squeezed her lover's hand which rested against the side of her stomach. Her gaze lingered on her lover's face as they walked and talked, a happy little grin making her lips twitch.

Billie's beauty always took her breath away. Her hair was perfect, even in its current tousled stage. The soft cleft of Billie's chin was more pronounced in the twilight, and her soft lips were curved into a contented smile as she spoke. Johanna wished their babies would arrive already, so that they could love them, and hold them; But very importantly, so that they could make love once again. She missed making love with Billie so much, and she knew the feeling was mutual. Billie never made her feel any less beautiful now that she was so many pounds over her normal weight. In fact, she always made sure Johanna knew how desirable she was. She felt like the luckiest woman alive.

Billie noticed Johanna was staring up at her, and she blushed slightly. "What?" She asked nervously. It was hard for her to believe that they'd been together for close to eight years, and that she still blushed when Johanna stared at her with such open adoration.

Johanna's grin grew; her lover's occasional bout of bashfulness always pleased her. "I was just thinking of how beautiful you are," She said softly. "And about how much I love you."

Billie stopped and turned towards Johanna, wrapping an arm around her back and pulling her as close as possible. Ever since Johanna's stomach became extremely obvious, she always enjoyed holding her like this, the large stomach pressing against her own. She sifted the fingers of her free hand through Johanna's thick hair. "And I love you, so very much." She whispered, the intensity of her words reflected in her eyes.

Her heart swelling with joy, Johanna reached up and wrapped her arms around her lover's neck. She pulled Billie down for a kiss.

Billie responded eagerly, feeling a shiver rush up her spine. Their kiss was soft and slow, and very deep, conveying their emotions.

After a long time, Johanna pulled back, smiling languidly. They hugged each other tightly, and then finally pulled back. She looked up into Billie's loving eyes. "What are you thinking about?" She asked softly. She was starting to get tired, and was going to ask Billie to turn around for home soon.

Billie kissed her cheeks and eyelids gently, and then pressed her forehead against Johanna's. "I was thinking about how I miss making love with you." She said hoarsely, feeling her body share the sentiment.

"Soon, honey," Johanna promised, meeting her eyes.

With a smile, Billie pulled back, her hands at Johanna's hips. She finally noticed how tired Johanna looked. There were small circles under eyes and Billie felt the smaller woman lean into her again. I shouldn't have caved into Johanna's demand to go for a walk. "Want to go back home?" She asked softly, concern taking over the previous feeling of happiness.

Johanna was worried that she wouldn't be able to make the walk back home, even though it was only two blocks away. She nodded, and allowed Billie to hold her as she had before, more of her weight supported by her strong lover.

Chapter Seven

Many nights later, a painful twinge in her abdomen woke Johanna from a fitful sleep. She gasped, sitting up slowly, hands at her stomach. She took deep breaths, trying to calm her nerves. She'd never felt anything like it, and waited anxiously for a few long minutes to see if there would be more. She looked down at Billie, the beam of the streetlight allowing her to see that her lover's eyes were still closed. Johanna sighed, if it was nothing, she didn't want to scare Billie unnecessarily.

She stood up slowly, trying to be as quiet as possible. In the bathroom, she splashed cool water on her face, still taking deep breaths. She didn't know what the hell that was, but it had to have been a contraction. She'd had none during the whole pregnancy, though Leo had let her know it could happen. They'd talked about the timing and frequency, and made sure to let her know when she should start worrying.

Finally calmed, she straightened and looked at herself in the mirror. Her hair was a mess, and there were dark circles under her eyes, from lack of sleep or her anemia, she didn't know. She'd stopped feeling attractive after about the fourth month, when her stomach shot out about ten inches in no time. She used the toilet, and noted the drops of blood in her underwear.

When she'd first noticed the blood a few weeks back, she and Billie had instantly called Leo. Leo had asked them to come in as soon as possible and thoroughly checked up on her when they did. Afterwards, the young doctor let them know that she didn't see anything wrong with the placenta, and an impromptu sonogram revealed that the babies were in good health and quite active.

"Jo?" Billie's sleep-husky voice rang out through the bathroom door. "Are you okay?"

So much for not worrying her, Johanna thought ruefully. She opened the door to let Billie in. Billie looked anxious, and her eyes were taking in everything about Johanna, trying to find anything wrong. "I'm fine, baby." Johanna said, cupping Billie's face with a hand.

Billie's shoulders visibly relaxed. "I'm sorry, it's just that I woke up and you weren't there. I kind of got scared." She said, wrapping her arms around Johanna and pressing her stomach gently against hers. One of the babies kicked in response, and she felt reassured by their presence.

"I'm fine, darling." Johanna reassured her, and brought her hands to Billie's small waist; she slipped them under Billie's T-shirt and gently caressed her sides. Billie's light hair was a mess, sticking out in all directions, and the side of her face had sheet crinkles on it. "You look adorable."

Billie looked at herself in the mirror, blushing slightly at the sight of her tousled hair. She ran a hand through it, trying to tame it, but it remained just as it was. "The risks of having short hair, I guess." She chuckled, and leaned down to kiss a smiling Johanna's lips gently. "Come on, let's get back to bed."

Johanna allowed Billie to support her as they walked. Billie helped her lay down on the bed and also helped her find the most comfortable position she could handle. Not long after, Billie cupped behind Johanna's body, both women drifted into sleep.

?

They had been making out for the better part of ten minutes, and Johanna started to pull back. They were standing together at the front door, and were in the process of saying goodbye. It was already mid-morning, and the sooner Billie left the sooner she'd be back. Billie protested at her retreat, and Johanna shushed her gently. "If you leave now, you'll get back sooner." She reasoned. "Unless you want to stay, that I have no problem with."

Billie pouted. "The kids from the high school are planning their senior trip." She said, sighing. "I have to go help Margo for a little while, because other people are starting to plan their vacations for the summer already. I don't want to leave Margo with all that work; I don't think I pay her enough to deal with all that."

Johanna chuckled, nodding. "Come back soon, okay? I'm going to miss you." She handed Billie her umbrella. The clouds were roiling outside, though the weather service hadn't predicted any rain.

Billie chuckled, slipping the umbrella under her arm and leaning towards Johanna again, tapping her lips for a long moment. "I love you." She said, softly. "I'll be back in couple of hours." She stepped out on the porch, feeling the wind tousle her hair.

"Okay, see you." Johanna said, smiling as she watched Billie walk away, her head down against the wind.

?

Johanna gasped awake, her hands flying to her abdomen at the sharp jab of pain and almost unbearable clench of its muscles. She'd been napping on the couch, having lain down as soon as Billie had left for work, tired. She rode the pain, struggling to take deep breaths, feeling the sweat break out across her forehead. This time felt worst than the night before, sharper and longer.

"Oh, God!" She cried out as her abdomen muscles contracted once again, the pain making her sit up. After the third continuous contraction, she frantically reached for the phone, knocking it down to the floor with a loud crash. At that moment, the doorbell rang.

?

Jewl rang her friend's doorbell, standing back patiently to allow Johanna the time to get to the door. She knew from experience that it was difficult for the future mother to move around.

Jewl sighed, looking around at the house's large porch. She missed her son, and knew Johanna would be disappointed by his absence. Lorna had practically begged her to leave Daniel with her, wanting to spend time with him. Jewl sighed sadly, thinking about Lorna.

In the first weeks after Joseph's death, Jewl had been saddened even more by watching her mother in law age ten years before her eyes. The bags under Lorna's eyes were prominent, and the sadness had dulled the bright blue of her eyes. Lorna had always looked much younger than her years, but the loss of her only son had taken something from her that she was just now starting to get back, with the help of her grandson.

Lorna had moved into Joseph and Jewl's house with Jewl when Jewl had left the hospital. The younger woman had been more than happy to have her close. Lorna hardly left the house, and when she did, it was only for a brief moment. When she visited Johanna, it was only for a short time and she returned home right away. Jewl suspected that she was feeling smothered by the sympathy constantly expressed by Illuminations' people. They were still receiving flowers at home from well-wishers, and it was getting so that they had to throw flowers out with the garbage every single day.

Jewl hated the attention, but she was grateful that people cared. She was sure Daniel would always know what a wonderful man his father was, not only from her and Lorna, but from everyone else too.

Jewl rang the doorbell again, moving to take a peek through the window close to the door. She knew it was the window to the living room, where Johanna spent a lot of her time during the day, and Jewl was sure she'd be there. She could hardly see through the curtains, but there was no movement that she could catch. Johanna hadn't told her about having to do anything today, as she always made sure to do when they spoke at night. Maybe they went out. She thought as she pulled away from the window. A crashing noise made her pause, and a muffled, though loud cry set her heart racing.

"Johanna?" She called out, pressing her face against the glass again.

"Jewl! Please, they're coming!"

Jewl heart fluttered again. For Johanna to scream like that there had to be a lot of pain involved. "Hold on, Johanna! Take it easy!" She yelled against the glass, hoping her friend would hear her. Jewl tried the doorknob, but it was locked. The window, she thought, looking around for something to break it with. There was a pot on the porch close to the steps, and she knew it would be good enough. She fumbled in her jacket pocket, pulling out her cellular. Dialing 911, she bent down and took the pot.

After giving the necessary information to the operator, she slipped the phone into her pocket. "Sorry, Johanna, Billie," She whispered as she swung back and slammed the pot into the window, sending glass flying everywhere. Johanna's cries gained volume now that the window was broken. "Hold on, Johanna, I'm coming!" Jewl reassured her, reaching through the window to open the lock with her left hand. She yanked her hand back with a loud curse, blood dripping copiously from her fingers. She'd cut a huge gash across her palm, and she was sure she could see bone; most importantly, she couldn't feel four fingers of the five. With a grimace of pain, she dismissed it. There were more important things going on now than her own hand.

With her good hand, she carefully pushed the window up, grateful that it was a new window, and not one of those heavy old ones. She slipped in carefully, holding her injured hand to her chest, uncaring of the blood falling all over her shirt and jacket.

Once fully inside, she ran over to her screaming friend, stopping abruptly at the sight. There was blood all over the couch and rug, and Johanna was clutching her stomach and crying. Jewl knelt down beside her. "Take deep breaths, Jo," She whispered, running her good hand over her friend's hair, gasping when she came in contact with a hot forehead.

The sound of the ambulance was a godsend, since she had no idea of what to do. She ran to the front door and opened it, moving to the side as two Emergency Workers followed Johanna's cries, a stretcher between them. She leaned back against the wall, sighing in relief. "Jewl, Jewl!" Johanna's frantic voice rang over the voices of the emergency workers.

Jewl ran back into the living room. She could cry at the pain contorting her friends' face. She thought ruefully of how glad she was that she hadn't been aware during Daniel's birth.

"Call Billie, please!" Johanna pleaded, just as the female worker placed an oxygen mask over her nose and mouth, and they carefully mounted her onto the lowered stretcher.

Jewl nodded, following them out of the house and pulling the cell phone out with her good hand. The sheriff was pulling up to the house just as the ambulance was leaving.

Tanya Jorgensen hurried up the steps towards Jewl. She was about to speak when she noticed Jewl's bloody hand. "Come on, you need to get that looked at." She said slowly, closing the door and steering Johanna towards her cruiser.

"I need to call Billie Jordan at the travel agency." Jewl explained as she walked, dialing.

"Okay, you can call on the way." Anne said, steering Jewl to the passenger side and opening the door for her. She drove away at top speed.



Continued in part XVII

Katia N. Ruiz