Instincts

(Xena)

Hatred is a very fickle master.
Under His influence,
The cruelest of deeds become
acts of loyal servitude

Personally, I always thought
I was born to Hate.
So easily did His wiles rule me.
So eagerly did my heart follow Him.

Then she walked into the darkness
that was my life and showed me that
Hate was not my master any more.
I learned to follow a new mistress--Love.

I learned to laugh, and feel it.
I learned to smile, and mean it.
I learned to love her with all that I am.

How vengeful a spurned master can be.

When I saw my son's death washed face,
Love lost her tentative hold on my soul
and Hate walked back in.

As I felt his life wither away from mine,
As I realized that I would never have
any chance to make any amends for
a past that shouldn't have been or
travel a future that would never be,
I Hated.

I Hated her.
You know that?
When I saw his pale face, I Hated Her.
My best friend, my greatest lover.
For her, I fought my way back from Tartarus.

Her stubborn refusal to view the world
through anything other than the rose hued
vision of the blissfully peaceful brought me here.

To this point in time.
Where Hate clasps my hand in His and
croons
Oh so softly.
So softly...

Hatred owned me before, this you know.
But for so long, she kept that harsh commander
away from my heart.

Now, without her gentle hand in mine,
it is so easy to re-submit to His will.
Hatred, my former Master, calls me to Him.

And I run...
Madly
Sadly
into His arms.

Once, I learned to love her.
Now I can only remember how
to hate her.

I Hate You, Gabrielle.